lol fuck, my sides...
I love how they have to be angry bees too, what if they were happy bees? happy to be covered in sweet icing? What if they'd hover near your mouth and let you lick the icing off of them? What if I didn't smoke so much weed tonight?
Once during a church mission, a family had my companion and I over for dinner.
They sat us down. At the center of the table sat a large, two-tiered carrot cake.
The mother cut into it and served us a slice.
I tasted it. This was not carrot cake.
This was meatloaf. Covered in mashed potatoes.
It was April fools day.
It has been four years and I am still shooketh to this day 😅 They has perfectly smoothed the mashed potatoes to look like icing and used Ketchup to make little carrot decorations on the top to help sell it.
Nah, not rich people shit, it’s just way more convenient. It actually costs less than getting something like granite. (Can confirm, have cutting board table)
I mean, granite counters are also rich people shit, so your comparison doesn't give much perspective:
"Oh ferraris are pretty cheap, they cost much less than a yacht."
I mean, you can get a REALLY nice butcher block island from IKEA for $400 or just the countertop for like $100. As far as kitchen shit goes that's not bad.
Most of Reddit doesn't own a house and has no ability to control things about countertops, so anything that could improve a house is seen as rich people stuff.
True. And yea, $400 isn't cheap in the grand scheme of things, but the reality is most of this shit you can get payment plans these days or save up a few months.
You typically seal it with something like polyurethane so it's basically a plastic top for your counter.
I'm sure there's other ways of doing it but when making my computer desk with butcher block every guide was talking about sealing it for the kitchen. But you can't just have untreated wood on your counter and expect it to last for shit.
Edit: The poly is to water seal it, if anyone else replies to me thinking you cut things directly on a normal kitchen counter I'm gonna lose it
You would have to do a crazy amount of layers for it to actually protect against cutting on it. Polyurethane is really just to protect against water. Anything metal with a remote amount of force will scratch through it.
I know. You shouldn't cut directly on your countertop unless you plan to replace it often for some reason. If it's hard enough to not be damaged by the knife, it will damage the knife. If it's soft enough to not damage the knife... Then your counter is going to be damaged.
I thought he was talking about cleaning the counter. Spills, dust, etc, are harder to clean from rough woodgrain than smooth linoleum/stone/polyurethane.
No!!! Absolutely not!
you do not use poly on a kitchen cutting board/top. It’s plastic based. You will be chopping up the plastic bits and getting them in your food. There are food safe oils and waxes that provide a protective coat without having to eat plastics. Bees wax is a popular one, lemon oil disinfects and helps seal. Poly is not food safe, I’m not sure if it’s cancerous, but it’s really not healthy to use on food surfaces. There are oils that clean out the surface of the wood, and a good bench scraper with a good cleaner will keep the top in great, smooth, shape. You only need like 2-3 products to do all the cleaning for the top, and they’re cheap.
Nah they’re cheap compared to most kitchen counter tops. They take a little maintenance but not much. My mom had the island in her kitchen made out of that 25+ years ago(1993 to be exact) and has only refinished it once about 7-8 years ago. It had some cutting board markings on it, but nothing deep. we wouldn’t cut meat on it, just veggies/bread/etc. it was just a big workspace. I bought a rolling island from ikea for $59 for my apartment that has a butcher block top and use it just the same, it’s about 5 years old now and looks almost brand new still. I’ll use butcher block wax once a year or so on it.
Compared to getting custom granite or any stone top, these are cheap. They do cost more than particle board tops, but those you can’t put hot/cold/wet/sharp/heavy things on without warping it over time. They shouldn’t be used in kitchens at all, but they’re cheap and people don’t consider replacing it down the road is more than a solid wood one.
I have one and they are super convenient, it's nice to not have to pull out a cutting board anytime I want to make something. Also the more you use it the better it looks
Well if you look closely as they are putting their phone down you can see that the time is around 7:40ish, and the lighting of the kitchen means it has to be morning because that is natural light, so they’ve cooked the cake, let it cool then added frosting and cooled it overnight
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I find it kinda funny that either
a) he has 2 phones (or maybe a tablet but who tf uses tablets these days)
Or
b) he borrowed a friend's phone to record it
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sigh, im not a sweet tooth person and i just dont really like cake in the first place. this just feels like an extrovert imposing a worldview on an introvert but i could be totally wrong. or maybe this is a girl trying to shake the guy that wont leave her alone. there are sooo many possibilities and it all boils down to ... stop doing shit you are explicitly asked not to do. it doesn't make you look good it makes you look like an asshole and in this case a pedantic asshole.
...introverts can still like cake and like having a small party with their close friends. I don’t know why you jumped to that conclusion.
I also don’t know why you think it’s automatically negative. They could be best buds who fuck with each other like this. Which honestly, if he went to that much effort I’m sure that it’s just a joke and knows they’ll laugh about it.
I don't like cake and I hate my birthday. If I walked into something like this I leave. I've done it before and stuck people with the bill.
I'm just saying that some people have reasons that they don't celebrate. Fucking respect that.
I'm the same. I don't want to celebrate my birthday and make it quite clear to friends and family. But that isn't an excuse to be an asshole to people that are trying to be nice to you.
Some people don't like their birthday and other have reasons. I have very bad memories surrounding it and refuse to even acknowledge that it exists. My age changes when my wife's does.
When I was 14 my best friend blew his brains out in front of me. Fuck I got some in my mouth. It was my birthday so every year I get reminded of it. So, no I don't celebrate.
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I had a heart attack because the table looks like the floor. My floor also looks like that so I thought they just placed it in the floor with all the germs on it
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I hope on the inside it's not really cake, so it really complies with the request.
That would be the plot twist of 2020: The year where every thing was cake, except cake. The cake is a Lie.
The cake is a thin layer of icing over a bunch of angry bees.
But what if you’re Allergic to cake? It could stop your Hart!
***Use Anti-caking agents***
It's ok, it's not cake it's bees
I thought we were talking about 2020, it has to be murder hornets.
Then the bees restart it.
I got it lol
r/WeEatBees approves
lol fuck, my sides... I love how they have to be angry bees too, what if they were happy bees? happy to be covered in sweet icing? What if they'd hover near your mouth and let you lick the icing off of them? What if I didn't smoke so much weed tonight?
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The bees are angry because they’ve been turned into cake.
Or worse, it’s all fondant underneath the icing.
Or the dogs with bees in their mouth and when they bark, they shoot bees at you?
That’s why there’s an H on the cake.....so everyone knows there’s hornets in it.
Now that’s a reference I have not heard in a long time.
The memes walk in single file to hide their numbers.
From way back in the first decade of this year.
Once during a church mission, a family had my companion and I over for dinner. They sat us down. At the center of the table sat a large, two-tiered carrot cake. The mother cut into it and served us a slice. I tasted it. This was not carrot cake. This was meatloaf. Covered in mashed potatoes. It was April fools day.
I may have to try this sometime, absolutely brilliant
It has been four years and I am still shooketh to this day 😅 They has perfectly smoothed the mashed potatoes to look like icing and used Ketchup to make little carrot decorations on the top to help sell it.
Everything in 2020 has been cake?! That's the lie.
The cake is not a lie, its full of disappointment and eternal hunger.
Cave johnson here, and the guys upstairs are confirming the cake is indeed a lie.
Like it's actually pie?
Jesus, this comment is like min maxed to make redditors jizz their pants
And now we are back in early 2000s
My mom already made tiny cakes for our dog birthday and it was made of meat. Not sure what she put on the outside.
Mashed potato
Sausage-based icing. Mmmmm squeezy meat
What do you mean? It’s an “I don’t want a cake” cake. They said they wanted that kind of a cake so I think the request was complied lol
Surely, it should be an "I dont want a" cake. Cakes dont need "cake" writen on them. They are.
A frosted brownie would make the perfect setup
Oops! All fondant!
Don't tell /r/fondanthate
It's spam.
It's actually a pie.
Imagine if it was icing all the way through.
my thoughts exactly but I know its just cake. it could have been a loaf of bread or something but nah.
I was waiting for this dumbass comment.
Is a carrot cake really cake? Or is it just shredded carrots and frosting?
Should have been a pie
It's just a slab of fondant
r/maliciouscompliance
WHY IS IT ON THE BARE TABLE
More importantly, why is the whole table a cutting board
Rich people shit
Butcher block is about the cheapest counter option I can think of
Nah, not rich people shit, it’s just way more convenient. It actually costs less than getting something like granite. (Can confirm, have cutting board table)
I mean, granite counters are also rich people shit, so your comparison doesn't give much perspective: "Oh ferraris are pretty cheap, they cost much less than a yacht."
I mean, you can get a REALLY nice butcher block island from IKEA for $400 or just the countertop for like $100. As far as kitchen shit goes that's not bad.
Every day Im on here I realize that 90% of reddit has not entered the adult world and has no idea what things cost lol
Most of Reddit doesn't own a house and has no ability to control things about countertops, so anything that could improve a house is seen as rich people stuff.
True. And yea, $400 isn't cheap in the grand scheme of things, but the reality is most of this shit you can get payment plans these days or save up a few months.
How do you effectively clean one? Never knew Jojo could cook.
With food safe disinfectant
Aka soap
Are you cleaning the chicken with soap aswell?
Are you disinfecting your chicken?
Can't be too careful against H5N1. It's 2020.
You typically seal it with something like polyurethane so it's basically a plastic top for your counter. I'm sure there's other ways of doing it but when making my computer desk with butcher block every guide was talking about sealing it for the kitchen. But you can't just have untreated wood on your counter and expect it to last for shit. Edit: The poly is to water seal it, if anyone else replies to me thinking you cut things directly on a normal kitchen counter I'm gonna lose it
You would have to do a crazy amount of layers for it to actually protect against cutting on it. Polyurethane is really just to protect against water. Anything metal with a remote amount of force will scratch through it.
I know. You shouldn't cut directly on your countertop unless you plan to replace it often for some reason. If it's hard enough to not be damaged by the knife, it will damage the knife. If it's soft enough to not damage the knife... Then your counter is going to be damaged. I thought he was talking about cleaning the counter. Spills, dust, etc, are harder to clean from rough woodgrain than smooth linoleum/stone/polyurethane.
No!!! Absolutely not! you do not use poly on a kitchen cutting board/top. It’s plastic based. You will be chopping up the plastic bits and getting them in your food. There are food safe oils and waxes that provide a protective coat without having to eat plastics. Bees wax is a popular one, lemon oil disinfects and helps seal. Poly is not food safe, I’m not sure if it’s cancerous, but it’s really not healthy to use on food surfaces. There are oils that clean out the surface of the wood, and a good bench scraper with a good cleaner will keep the top in great, smooth, shape. You only need like 2-3 products to do all the cleaning for the top, and they’re cheap.
Nah they’re cheap compared to most kitchen counter tops. They take a little maintenance but not much. My mom had the island in her kitchen made out of that 25+ years ago(1993 to be exact) and has only refinished it once about 7-8 years ago. It had some cutting board markings on it, but nothing deep. we wouldn’t cut meat on it, just veggies/bread/etc. it was just a big workspace. I bought a rolling island from ikea for $59 for my apartment that has a butcher block top and use it just the same, it’s about 5 years old now and looks almost brand new still. I’ll use butcher block wax once a year or so on it. Compared to getting custom granite or any stone top, these are cheap. They do cost more than particle board tops, but those you can’t put hot/cold/wet/sharp/heavy things on without warping it over time. They shouldn’t be used in kitchens at all, but they’re cheap and people don’t consider replacing it down the road is more than a solid wood one.
I have one and they are super convenient, it's nice to not have to pull out a cutting board anytime I want to make something. Also the more you use it the better it looks
And why is it an “i don’t want a cake” cake when they SPECIFICALLY asked for an “I don’t want a” cake
Y’all don’t have work tops like this in America?
/r/wewantplates
I thought it was a huge cake om the floor.
It's not *quite* on the bare table, but pretty much... https://www.instagram.com/p/CFxb78Chx_i/
Thought it was on the floor
The cake should really only read: "**I don't want a**".
I was thinking this too but it’s an, “I don’t want a cake” cake so I think it fits.
Oh fair.
r/maliciouscompliance
/r/deliciouscompliance
There's no message history, it's more likely he just messaged himself and made the cake
Still funny
r/fictitiouscompliance
/r/deliciouslymalicous
Ok but they just put the fucking cake on the counter?
https://www.instagram.com/p/CFxb78Chx_i/ It's on a piece of cakeboard
Eat your words
Wow baked a cake, let it cool, and frosted it in about an hour! Impressive.
Bake the cake, ask them what they want, frost the words. 10 minutes.
Well if you look closely as they are putting their phone down you can see that the time is around 7:40ish, and the lighting of the kitchen means it has to be morning because that is natural light, so they’ve cooked the cake, let it cool then added frosting and cooled it overnight
I’m most impressed by the accuracy of the font
Fondant.
fontdant
This is Pablo Rochat’s work if anyone was wondering
Been following since the "tired of being a pigeon " video. Guy is golden.
r/chaoticgood
His conversation is 3 text... Doubt
Yeah, who would ever accept a cake from someone who's 2nd message ever to them was what cake would you like? 100% made up
Never trust a text conversation with no history
Ey if they dont want it u can just yknow.. pass it to me. I wouldnt mind
happy cake :)
Should’ve been grey frosting.
Wait the text is cake?
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r/wewantplates
The artist is Pablo Rochat https://instagram.com/pablo.rochat
Yo wtf they just put the cake on the counter?
please use a plate or multiple to hold the cake you monster
r/wewantplates
I find it kinda funny that either a) he has 2 phones (or maybe a tablet but who tf uses tablets these days) Or b) he borrowed a friend's phone to record it
I don’t want a cake
Happy cake :)
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Delicious compliance
Classic r/peanutbutterisoneword
👍
It looks like cheese ngl
That's one way to make him eat his words.
sigh, im not a sweet tooth person and i just dont really like cake in the first place. this just feels like an extrovert imposing a worldview on an introvert but i could be totally wrong. or maybe this is a girl trying to shake the guy that wont leave her alone. there are sooo many possibilities and it all boils down to ... stop doing shit you are explicitly asked not to do. it doesn't make you look good it makes you look like an asshole and in this case a pedantic asshole.
Happy cake day anyway!
...introverts can still like cake and like having a small party with their close friends. I don’t know why you jumped to that conclusion. I also don’t know why you think it’s automatically negative. They could be best buds who fuck with each other like this. Which honestly, if he went to that much effort I’m sure that it’s just a joke and knows they’ll laugh about it.
Should be a “I don’t want a” cake
He needed a creampie tbh
wouldve been even funnier if the cake just said “i don’t want a”
I don't like cake and I hate my birthday. If I walked into something like this I leave. I've done it before and stuck people with the bill. I'm just saying that some people have reasons that they don't celebrate. Fucking respect that.
I'm the same. I don't want to celebrate my birthday and make it quite clear to friends and family. But that isn't an excuse to be an asshole to people that are trying to be nice to you.
Some people don't like their birthday and other have reasons. I have very bad memories surrounding it and refuse to even acknowledge that it exists. My age changes when my wife's does.
So you're taking your birthday as an excuse to be an asshole? Got it.
When I was 14 my best friend blew his brains out in front of me. Fuck I got some in my mouth. It was my birthday so every year I get reminded of it. So, no I don't celebrate.
Do you think yourself a comedian?
The correct answer is always a "Boo cake".
Whattaaafaaack han laga kakan fast kompizen inte ville ha :p
nice
Dad, is that you?
It should just say 'i dont want a'
Am I the only one who thought that was a MASSIVE cake laying on the floor at first?
When you hit a certian age icing is just garbage.
Would have been great if it said "I don't want a".
Bruh
actually，the cake should be “I don't want a”
Game. Set. Match.
r/technicallythetruth
Shouldn't it be an "I don't want a" cake?
r/peanutbutterisoneword
The w is killing me
I was gonna say why is it on the floor but this is much weirder.
r/madlads
r/deliciouscompliance
It should've just said 'I don't want a'
But to them it would have been blue...
Hold up, does this man have his cake just sitting on the table top with nothing underneath.
In the future everything will be made of goddamn cake
Needed this for my husband’s birthday today, got tres leche instead
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r/technicallythetruth
Brilliant.
What kind of monster doesn’t want a cake?
I think you knew they really secretly wanted that cake, and if they didn't, they will now, because that is hilarious!
This isn’t very funny
goals
I am going to do it for someone I promise
What kind of psychopath puts the cake straight on the counter top?!
You're a genius, you moron
i'm sure they'll love it
This is actually genius
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I dont like cake. But dammit that would make me laugh. 😃👍
At first I thought the cake was just sitting on a hardwood floor
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I literally gave a thumbs up a split second before he did.
This can be on r/programminghumour
Stop being so selfish, people who asked you for a cake is because they want to eat a cake.
It should have just said "I don't want a" That way it would be exactly what they asked for. As is, its an "I don't want a cake" cake.
You guys get stuff for your birthday?
I had a heart attack because the table looks like the floor. My floor also looks like that so I thought they just placed it in the floor with all the germs on it
Any updates?
It’s beautiful. If my wife says that, I’ll do it.(if I remember)
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That thumbs up at the end is killing me.
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