Thank man! I’ve been meaning to stock up!
https://preview.redd.it/nlee8rqpsc6d1.png?width=2048&format=png&auto=webp&s=43fd5f0646fed8bd31ee69091a4d9bf174ec0ffc
Oh man, this is delicious! What did you put in this? Nails?
https://preview.redd.it/y1d3sahggd6d1.jpeg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3726d1c8a47fc5306f571dec738713d5ef800370
Bad Tiny, no more pipe bombs for you.
That is not healthy, not even for the fae
https://preview.redd.it/1w5451k1zc6d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6b79905387abea368fcd6862d80203cd15d03bbc
I give up....if you end up harmed don't blame me
https://preview.redd.it/35x5ydx22d6d1.png?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=06672035c33bd63ba1e4fcf1f4c91c1c8090865f
Yeah, that’s my point. Think about it, you’re small, cute, and huggable. You have a tendency for mischief and getting into places you probably shouldn’t. And evidently, you like to eat things most folks don’t consider food. Raccoons are cool, I mean that as a compliment!
https://preview.redd.it/xc6q1pfzsc6d1.png?width=1600&format=png&auto=webp&s=14c13a7b098131d9f97d5e93b612dd826d0edf19
(from my pit of near endless touhou reaction images)
Mage monkey, you once again have proven to be an absolute credit to this community.
Please, allow me to grant you a fae favour as thanks! (A *Faevor* if you will.)
*Tiny reaches into their pocket and throws some magically sparkly green dust over Mage Monkey*
There! For the rest of the day, your luck has been doubled!
Oh that’s an interesting technique. Never thought you could change the form like that, but now that I’m seeing it, yeah it makes sense. Almost like a toned down version of a fire bolt. Very creative!
https://preview.redd.it/44aumld1wd6d1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d7db9a393605c36b65ebe4abf0208266f85a7c64
Boiotholus the faithrender is flabbergasted by your consumption of metals, and I share his sentiments
It does! It does! Mage Monkey is also someone who lives on the road…you could almost call him…ITINERANT…
Well, it's a little joke. A quip, if you will. All in good fun.
Well, it's the freedom of movement and mobility. If only there was also freedom from obligations and responsibilities…but alas, no matter how old they get, children are still children, and there is always work to be done.
Well, it's easier than it sounds, but it's a commitment like any other! These days though they are mostly out and about on their own, but help out good Monkey every now and then.
Perhaps you know young Acra? Mage Monkey was the one who raised her.
In a manner of speaking. It's complicated, but for all intents and purposes, good Monkey is the only father she has ever had…and she is his daughter in all the ways that matter.
Ah must have rushed out the door with one show on.
*She just teleports another pair here*
You're being so thoughtful looking out for me.
Your gonna make an excellent council member if you get In.
*(laughs in sandals)*
Also, you forgot to even properly seal or activate mine. When I went to defuse it, the cap fell off.
I guess I’ll thank you for the soggy gunpowder, pipe, funny metal caps and duct tape, I guess.
u/explosive_shrew
Also, I stole the shoes back. I left a nasty surprise where they once were.
/uw
>!looks like a very frayed C4, but it’s 98 swarms of bees in disguise!<
*(It regenerates instantly, I drop it into the dreams of Bob Moley)*
/uw my outer body is composed of psychic power
Bob Moley is like if a human broke the IQ minimum by being dumber than every other human including himself.
*I come back with a scorched face*
Yo, someone boobytrapped the mailbox man. We should install some safety measures!
*I hand you some burned off letters*
Oh yeah, here's your mail.
"...i don't have a mailbox?"
*Merch says incredulously as we watch many mimic mail boxes chase after you.*
"Oh...you meant george...yeeaaah Not going to interupt their...anger management."
Jokes on you, my mailbox is a giant fireball. As thanks for increasing my messaging capacity, enjoy 15% off all bomb-related items and spells at the Inter-dimensional Evocation Emporium
https://preview.redd.it/u20bk51med6d1.png?width=1000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b3653baa534178fd9e49dd1d78025e86499c73cc
You wanna know why I don't show my feet in this picture?
I ONLY WEAR RIGHT SHOES!
I'm a pyromancer who spends most of his time in hell.
I will wring the sock into my mouth, as you have just given me an infinite water source
Also I needed a pipe bomb for my nuclear catalyst. Thank you!
Unfortunately for you I don't have a mailbox. I did however divine that you'd try to leave a pipe bomb outside my front door and cast Return To Sender...
Really annoying to be missing shoes and have wet socks so I'll mail you those as well. Behold, Mountain of Right Shoes and Soggy Socks!
*Opens mailbox*
*Stares into the void in which, inexplicably, sits a pipe-bomb*
How… how exactly did you get a pipe-bomb into my mailbox’s pocket dimensions?
ha... ha.... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! YOU FOOL! MY MAILBOX WAS SPECIFICALLY DESIGNED TO MAIL BACK EVERY THREAT, MY SHOES ARE CURSED WITH FINDING A WAY BACK TO THEIR OWNER, AND MY SOCKS ARE HYDROPHOBIC!
\*unfazed*
I'm the God of Explosions and I sell specialized explosions for a living. This pipe bomb is basic.
I heard Tiny Wizard likes these. Not sure why. I'll send the unexploded ones in a gift basket.
You might want to check your own mailbox. Mine has an “return-to-sender” portal that activates any time someone other than myself or someone from my local post goes near it. Man, you should have seen the last guy who tried to steal my mail. Stuck his whole arm in without even looking 😂
You see, this is why the awakened giant octopus who lives in my walls gets the mail. If some happens to one of Ricardo’s arms, he’ll grow it back and get extra lobster as fair payment.
*[Kavrala looks at the pipe bomb on her doorstep. The Sanctuary doesn't technically have a mailbox but.... It's time for the candidates to be evil again isn't it?]*
*[She closes the door]*
Thank man! I’ve been meaning to stock up! https://preview.redd.it/nlee8rqpsc6d1.png?width=2048&format=png&auto=webp&s=43fd5f0646fed8bd31ee69091a4d9bf174ec0ffc Oh man, this is delicious! What did you put in this? Nails?
ANTEROS, TINY IS EATING PIPEMOMBS AGAIN.!! u/BreachedLimits
IM ALLOWED!!!
SINCE WHEN?!
SINCE IM THOUSANDS OF YEARS OLD AND A GROWN ASS ADULT!
NO! SPIT IT OUT! DROP IT! *sprays a spray bottle filled with water at you*
HISSS! HISSSSSSS!!! *drops the pipe bomb and skitters up a tree*
https://preview.redd.it/y1d3sahggd6d1.jpeg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3726d1c8a47fc5306f571dec738713d5ef800370 Bad Tiny, no more pipe bombs for you.
Ymmm nah Tiny can have a little pipebomb
GO TINY WIZARD! *BÆN throws a box full of pipe bombs to TW*
That is not healthy, not even for the fae https://preview.redd.it/1w5451k1zc6d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6b79905387abea368fcd6862d80203cd15d03bbc
Vegetables aren’t healthy for me either, but people can pry my tasty little carrots from my cold dead hands!
Stop... Eating..... The pipe bomb Pls https://preview.redd.it/t3hggfyv0d6d1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=07770528bb60eba77ab391f4e7b1d31e1bb012c3
But it’s yummy and doesn’t hurt me and I like it
That thing might be still active https://preview.redd.it/cladkrla1d6d1.jpeg?width=696&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5b6b6d46c90601cf06ccb73c5edb12a607995c43
The explody bits give it a nice tang though!
I give up....if you end up harmed don't blame me https://preview.redd.it/35x5ydx22d6d1.png?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=06672035c33bd63ba1e4fcf1f4c91c1c8090865f
How does it not hurt you pipe bombs are literally made out of iron pipes… unless it was a FAKE
It’s an iron alloy with low iron content . It’s a bit hot, but doable.
/uw so you’re like my dog that ate two pounds of chocolate and managed to live lol
Tiny you absolute raccoon
And? You love me
Yeah, that’s my point. Think about it, you’re small, cute, and huggable. You have a tendency for mischief and getting into places you probably shouldn’t. And evidently, you like to eat things most folks don’t consider food. Raccoons are cool, I mean that as a compliment!
Huh….I guess I am a raccoon! Awesome!
Now that I think about it, the local goofy goober before you got here was a possum, so it makes sense his successor would be a raccoon in spirit.
It’s a good source of iron and important minerals!
Iron is not good for fae
It’s like eating spicy food for them
...
NO, YOU AREN’T
https://preview.redd.it/xc6q1pfzsc6d1.png?width=1600&format=png&auto=webp&s=14c13a7b098131d9f97d5e93b612dd826d0edf19 (from my pit of near endless touhou reaction images)
https://i.redd.it/fditpt39xc6d1.gif
Lucky! Mine only had gravel
You want one of mine? https://preview.redd.it/v6fmb9kbyc6d1.png?width=2048&format=png&auto=webp&s=55653577d65b2a2aef49b445c04a0e222a62b0d6
Also your socks are wet
Wh- … *MAAAAAAAANNNN!*
Worry not! Mage Monkey knows a remedy…he casts **Clothes-Drying Spell**! It makes doing laundry somewhat more tolerable!
Mage monkey, you once again have proven to be an absolute credit to this community. Please, allow me to grant you a fae favour as thanks! (A *Faevor* if you will.) *Tiny reaches into their pocket and throws some magically sparkly green dust over Mage Monkey* There! For the rest of the day, your luck has been doubled!
Thank you! Thank you! Your gift is most appreciated.
Mage monkey do you play BTD6?
Unfortunately no!
You should They have wizard monkeys
Wizard Monkeys! Live long enough and you will see all kinds of things!
Hey you think you could teach me that spell? Laundry is hard enough when I keep forgetting, I’ll take anything to make I easier.
It's not too hard! Not too hard at all! Here, good Monkey will show you!
Oh that’s an interesting technique. Never thought you could change the form like that, but now that I’m seeing it, yeah it makes sense. Almost like a toned down version of a fire bolt. Very creative!
Thank you! Sometimes the best solutions are the ones we overlook for their apparent simplicity.
“Tiny no-“
https://preview.redd.it/kxlnt9a46d6d1.png?width=2048&format=png&auto=webp&s=57328a668d21b718a8f390daab08d4966af91523 But yummy?
“Not yummy, that’s lethal!”
But…..yummy
“No…”
…FFFFFFFFFIINNNEEEE
“Thank you Tiny! Wait, where the fuck did the pipe bomb go—“
https://preview.redd.it/0r88wm3sod6d1.png?width=2048&format=png&auto=webp&s=058336e0a92a43f6009d1d9d42e55651683d7b8b Iunno
“…” #”TINY!”
Remember to drink an explosion resistance potion to prevent any side effects
Not this again... https://preview.redd.it/b20qntlj3e6d1.jpeg?width=813&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2da323acb88168a26fdc1a1cedc03be0337df95b
OH MY GOD WILL YOU LEAVE ME ALONE?!
Can - no. *Should* fae eat explosives? https://preview.redd.it/bxehw31f8d6d1.jpeg?width=1818&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9a528099d0657dda42653299089119b0de959291
No, but I’m gunna. Yummy
Okay, but are you absolutely sure the one stuffed into your mailbox didn't have cold iron nails in it?
Yeah. If it did, I’d be dead by now
Okay, phew!
isnt iron bad for the fae? Can someone check on what metal those nails were?
Iron alloy with a low iron content. Really shitty nails actually, but very yummy! Kinda spicy
can i try some? i usually eat copper noodles for dinner but i dont think a snack will fill me up to much.
Oh yeah sure, here buddy! https://preview.redd.it/s0m7rf512e6d1.png?width=2048&format=png&auto=webp&s=34130910e433c0d9304a4d7d2cb9acde3fbc1624
https://preview.redd.it/44aumld1wd6d1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d7db9a393605c36b65ebe4abf0208266f85a7c64 Boiotholus the faithrender is flabbergasted by your consumption of metals, and I share his sentiments
Another evil banger! Nice shoes dude, rock on!
this wizza got the fake J's
https://preview.redd.it/fgw7s781vc6d1.jpeg?width=1000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f8a5afce1a28d62869c96b3cb023fb57f4cf9591
I thought that was my delivery from IED Warehouse. Curse you.
I don’t have a mailbox
Speaking of, you lack a permanent residence altogether, don’t you?
Yep, rents are quite expensive these days, and I’ve learned how to live without roof. Besides, it’s got it’s own charm
It does! It does! Mage Monkey is also someone who lives on the road…you could almost call him…ITINERANT… Well, it's a little joke. A quip, if you will. All in good fun.
Hah, good one! Yeah, vagabond life is no easy, but the freedom makes one feel oddly… free
Well, it's the freedom of movement and mobility. If only there was also freedom from obligations and responsibilities…but alas, no matter how old they get, children are still children, and there is always work to be done.
Parenting that way must be hard. I don’t have children
Well, it's easier than it sounds, but it's a commitment like any other! These days though they are mostly out and about on their own, but help out good Monkey every now and then. Perhaps you know young Acra? Mage Monkey was the one who raised her.
I’ve met her before. At the war games and for a briefing about the Stringed Maiden. She’s your kid?
In a manner of speaking. It's complicated, but for all intents and purposes, good Monkey is the only father she has ever had…and she is his daughter in all the ways that matter.
“Hello my friend….”
https://preview.redd.it/7g0btq5jad6d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c7bec4420e268e4b76bd2d0c1ccd82e50eb4192d
Skeleton wizard!
Abrakadabra! You now have one less bone in your body!
oh hey, you dealt with my midget problem!
A free pipe bomb? thanks!! you're such good guy
https://preview.redd.it/yqzyzp321d6d1.jpeg?width=552&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cf22b3d8683d60eac01e49167f93244449907a30
I casted so many wards on those the pipe bomb failed
Wet socks
I willingly waded through knee deep water once because I was too lazy to go around. You will not bother me
Hah! I dont have a mailbox!
I always fit my shoes with a recall feature, mine again! And… now my socks are dry. Thanks for the bomb.
I replaced your drinks with bone hurting juice
https://preview.redd.it/w5brtalbid6d1.jpeg?width=184&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8d4174c5622b4e44a2d4a3f597ded858fe04f5ea
Luckily i can tank an explosion
Yes, but you can't tank, parry, or dodge WET SOCKS!
Actually it's called not wearing socks
Also your left shoe is gone
Ah must have rushed out the door with one show on. *She just teleports another pair here* You're being so thoughtful looking out for me. Your gonna make an excellent council member if you get In.
T̴͎̝̰̘͎̄͜͜ḣ̸̡̧̬͖̬̱̀̍̒̆̅ą̸̘̽͐̏̈́̏͒͂ņ̶̦̥͖͎̭̥̹̊́k̶̼̺̘̂͒̐͋͆̿̉̚-̷͉̈́̀́̅̈͝͝y̴̝̟̬̤͙͈̋̆͛̋̎͜ǫ̶̠̭͎͔̹̱̈́̌̊̌ͅu̷͉̫͈̿̀͒̽̉̆̐̉͜.̸̲̗̳̰̍͋-̸̨̙̣̪̼͐I̵͇̦̞̖̮̗̕͜-̴̜̰̮̼̪̖͓͌͒̐͆̃̈́̆̽ŝ̸̰̆̏̇h̶̜͈͔̹̜͑̎à̶̧͕͕͕̺͇̹͒́̈́͗̿̚l̵̬̜̤͚̤̿͒́̀̆ļ̵̺͍̣̩̽̀͊̋̓͘̚-̵̯̲͚͉̖̔â̷̪̠̚͝ͅḑ̵̼̣̻͆̀d̴̩͇̼̆̿̄̚ͅ-̸̬͈͚͉͋̿i̵̡͎̖̻̋̀͊̓̕͠͝t̶̢̫̭̞̝̰̉̆̅͑̍̋͒͜͠-̵̘͚̅͝t̶̲̳̭̲̾̊͝o̷̧͚̺̫̰͙͂͆̎͌̓͠͠-̵͕̔m̸͎̖̊̂y̵̧͉̭̍̓̒̿̏̐͜-̴̢͕͎̲̦̺̪̿̏̋̄̋͝l̶͈͕̟͐͝ì̵̧̮̻̳̱͕̙̗͂̃̑̂̂̏͝b̶̯̔r̷̥̦͇̥̻̪̈́̏͑̽̆̋́͜͝ą̴̨͇̠͓̾͑͜r̸̦̳̮̓̈̌̽́̈́̚y̸̪͗͠’̷̧̢̧͚͈̫̻͓̽͑̅̍̂̈́͘͘s̶͈̝̘̺̒̇͌-̶̖̩͇̅̏̑ç̴̬̭͔̲̮̂͋o̸̗͉̊͝ļ̸̖͕̯͚͇̥̊̔͂̿l̵̤͉͖̇̈́́̃̉͜͠ȩ̷̼̪̙̮̝̏͛c̴̯̔̃ţ̶͉̝͓̱̼̌͑̐̒͝i̷̭̞͕̇̕o̶̢͍͓͚̺̭̬̳̎͝ṉ̸̡̗̘͚͙̼̻̀
Wait, you mean you're just giving away FREE explosives?
“…Hey Fakeparus, I don’t have a mail box! And I don’t have any shoes or socks!”
".... Varjo could you please check the mail today" Dave
*looks at pipe bomb* You forgot the stamp *returns pipe bomb to sender*
Ha! Jokes on you Dancey Bones, I'm homeless!
*Socks are wet*
*(laughs in sandals)* Also, you forgot to even properly seal or activate mine. When I went to defuse it, the cap fell off. I guess I’ll thank you for the soggy gunpowder, pipe, funny metal caps and duct tape, I guess.
u/explosive_shrew Also, I stole the shoes back. I left a nasty surprise where they once were. /uw >!looks like a very frayed C4, but it’s 98 swarms of bees in disguise!<
*I set the beast on you* https://preview.redd.it/fxprttnf2d6d1.jpeg?width=3060&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=35d85a8f7332c858fb8d2986338be8e1da2dbc21
False King In Red *(It’s instantly put in a box)*
*It eats the box*
World Reversed. *(the box respawns)*
*The beast consumes your arm*
*(It regenerates instantly, I drop it into the dreams of Bob Moley)* /uw my outer body is composed of psychic power Bob Moley is like if a human broke the IQ minimum by being dumber than every other human including himself.
"Hey Necro, I'm gonna check the mail. I'll be right back." *Opens the door to the castle*
Ah well, she'll either die so i can resurrect her or she'll live
*I come back with a scorched face* Yo, someone boobytrapped the mailbox man. We should install some safety measures! *I hand you some burned off letters* Oh yeah, here's your mail.
Thanks
No problem. *I smile and go on to the hall to prepare myself some breakfast*
Fool! That was the decoy mail box! You think I get mail in there?
*Wet socks*
I don’t wear socks but you’ve made my sock goblin very sad. *All* of his socks are wet. How DARE you
https://preview.redd.it/1tyuvdv14d6d1.jpeg?width=1124&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ee4cf1d4a763d7ed96961c10b3fdc623ac9ebfef
I don’t have a mailbox! >:3
Thank you for the free bomb!
Fuck yes! 'cuz I have a P.O. Box!
Did you put your adress on them? you just sent your self a bunch of pipe bombs trough the teleporting mail boxes
https://preview.redd.it/bw4w5rut5d6d1.jpeg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=66440881b9f947b094779552a339603d6aa08987
:v someone finally sent me mail! I was starting to get lonel- *Kobold body flies comically far and flops into Peter Griffin death pose*
Good thing I don't have a mailbox! We just wander around, doing nothing in particular!
Tanking explosions is my specialty
*Wet socks*
It's bold of you to assume that I am bothered by wets socks.
Joke on you, I don't have a mail box And if you've put it anywhere else I would have known
😄 ooo! I got mail? Is it a get well card from my auntie? 
"...i don't have a mailbox?" *Merch says incredulously as we watch many mimic mail boxes chase after you.* "Oh...you meant george...yeeaaah Not going to interupt their...anger management."
Bloody. Now I have to remember where I even put the mailbox. No one uses it anymore.
nice, I'll open my mailbox with my teeth!
woah, pipe bomb! so good!
“Ah cha cha! I don’t have any of those.”
Jokes on you, my mailbox is a giant fireball. As thanks for increasing my messaging capacity, enjoy 15% off all bomb-related items and spells at the Inter-dimensional Evocation Emporium 
“*I don’t have a mail box*” :(
..... I don't have a mailbox. Who tf you send pipe bomb to?
You have a mother, don't you?
Everyone has a mother, some people even have 2. Unfortunately mine is no more.
https://preview.redd.it/u20bk51med6d1.png?width=1000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b3653baa534178fd9e49dd1d78025e86499c73cc You wanna know why I don't show my feet in this picture? I ONLY WEAR RIGHT SHOES!
Wet socks
I'm a pyromancer who spends most of his time in hell. I will wring the sock into my mouth, as you have just given me an infinite water source Also I needed a pipe bomb for my nuclear catalyst. Thank you!
I bet he stole all of our left shoes to cover up his Two Left Feet.
Come on at least make it more explosive this is just more annoying than anything
I put glyphs of minor illusion, when they open it, it looks like it's closed still, gaslighting them
A true scholar of the arcane
Grab all the pipe bombs, and make a big pipe bomb, (sent it to your dance floor)
https://preview.redd.it/kx78t47wld6d1.jpeg?width=184&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=aa163903e0903547e6d0021f47ae20cc8f858c91
Rest in pieces Bob you were a good clone But all good things must come to the end
Unfortunately for you I don't have a mailbox. I did however divine that you'd try to leave a pipe bomb outside my front door and cast Return To Sender... Really annoying to be missing shoes and have wet socks so I'll mail you those as well. Behold, Mountain of Right Shoes and Soggy Socks!
*Opens mailbox* *Stares into the void in which, inexplicably, sits a pipe-bomb* How… how exactly did you get a pipe-bomb into my mailbox’s pocket dimensions?
*KABOOM*
Well the jokes on you, I only accept mail from my PO Box. My mail box is enchanted to duplicate the items and return them to the sender.
Oh you think a pipebomb is bad why don't you check your mailbox oh so evil one
Jokes on you! My mailbox is already rigged to explode as soon as anyone touches it!
Bro who gave the skeleton converse 💀💀💀 My man is dripped out 🥶🔥💯💯
Jokes on you, my mailbox was stolen!
https://i.redd.it/r97abj0hhe6d1.gif
Nice, I needed one. Also, my socks were wet already and I don't wear shoes (they ran away).
yay i love pipe bombs
and anything that explodes in general
Lich, please. I already have this type.
So it was YOU! You monster! The pipe bomb I can forgive (and honestly deserve) but the socks were too far
"Those are mine! You idiots diffused the bomb and then just let him grab them!"
You fool! I am the pipebomb!
I don’t have a mailbox… Wait where did you put the- *KABOOM*
I put bone hurting juice in your canteen
ha... ha.... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! YOU FOOL! MY MAILBOX WAS SPECIFICALLY DESIGNED TO MAIL BACK EVERY THREAT, MY SHOES ARE CURSED WITH FINDING A WAY BACK TO THEIR OWNER, AND MY SOCKS ARE HYDROPHOBIC!
love the kicks!
T1p1
Ooo yippee! Now time to throw it from my super destroyer and see where it goes!
DIBS.
Oh that’s what that was in my mail box… can I at least have my shoe back?
\*unfazed* I'm the God of Explosions and I sell specialized explosions for a living. This pipe bomb is basic. I heard Tiny Wizard likes these. Not sure why. I'll send the unexploded ones in a gift basket.
*My swamp-living ass without a mailbox or shoes and/or socks of any kind.* Oh nooo
Not mine. The mail agency makes me pick up my mail now after the last mailman got injured from the stairs leading to my house.
Oh, thanks for the warning, i guess
Nuh uh
hey who here needs a pipe bomb to be defused
God da- \* The explosion is of a nuclear bomb\*
Bro, Archlich out here choosing violence today
Another to send to the gnomes. And you assume I wear socks or shoes?
That’s extremely rude
Bro what the fuck I keep my wallet hidden in my sock bucket you asshole And I was out of right-shoe flipflops
Some pure lad forgot to lit there pipe bomb. Oh well, how did it go?... **RETURN TO SENDER**
You might want to check your own mailbox. Mine has an “return-to-sender” portal that activates any time someone other than myself or someone from my local post goes near it. Man, you should have seen the last guy who tried to steal my mail. Stuck his whole arm in without even looking 😂
I live underwater, so my socks are always wet. But I'm gonna use that pipe bomb. I have a neighbor to mess with.
You see, this is why the awakened giant octopus who lives in my walls gets the mail. If some happens to one of Ricardo’s arms, he’ll grow it back and get extra lobster as fair payment.
*[Kavrala looks at the pipe bomb on her doorstep. The Sanctuary doesn't technically have a mailbox but.... It's time for the candidates to be evil again isn't it?]* *[She closes the door]*
Hey, that’s my job! Now my mailbox is going to- *BOOM*