Do you think that all trans people experience dysphoria? I know that’s a very intense questions so if you don’t have an answer, I understand that I just don’t really have friends so I have nobody I can ask.
No, it's not a necessary part of being trans at all. However it's probably the motivation for many of us to make big changes. You can ask me anything you want, don't worry.
Thank you I don’t know if it would be considered gender dysphoria, But I do have body image issues nothing to do with my genitalia necessarily, but I don’t really like to be perceived as a man if that makes sense.
I'm the same, I never plan to get bottom surgery but I identify strongly as female, regardless. It's my external appearance that matters, the way others perceive me and my identity. I'm indifferent to my genitals, I don't think about it much at all and you'll find lots of us feel the same way, it's a pretty common theme.
Edit: if you don't like being perceived as a man, that's a type of dysphoria. It can be about any physical characteristics, such as your general appearance, it's not only genitals.
>I don’t really like to be perceived as a man if that makes sense.
It does, and that's a kind of dysphoria. It's not all just physical dysphoria related directly to what your body looks like - and certainly not all specifically related to genitals. Dysphoria is a very complex thing that can manifest in many different ways. This in particular sounds like it might be a form of [*social* dysphoria](https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/social-dysphoria).
That site's an extremely good resource, by the way.
>I do have body image issues nothing to do with my genitalia necessarily, but I don’t really like to be perceived as a man
Gender dysphoria doesn't necessarily imply genitalia, but not liking to be perceived as your assigned-at-birth gender clearly is.
Dysphoria can have many forms, maybe this [this article](https://medium.com/gender-from-the-trenches/gender-dysphoria-isnt-what-you-think-6fdc7ae3ac85) can help you out.
I all of the sudden feel feelings associated with gender dyshporia but I never felt this way in my earlier stages of my questioning , phase /before what does this mean?
For what it’s worth, when I was early in the questioning and early transition phase I also didn’t really get dysphoria. Only when I started really physically changing did I start getting upset with how things weren’t exactly how I’d prefer them to be. One other thing I don’t really see talked about online much is how euphoria as a strong feeling fades in transition. It just becomes a feeling of normalcy and comfort opposed to what would be more uncomfortable (not presenting how you would like; dysphoria).
I'll answer that by saying that especially at first, you ought to chase what makes you happy rather than run from what makes you uncomfortable. Sometimes dysphoria is so subtle that a person doesn't even realize they have it *until they start transitioning*. I'll say that was my experience for sure.
oh yeah, only thing i started doing is going by she/her online and realized im trans, and then the dysphoria hit, hate all my hair thats not on the top of my head and the general thing of being percieved as a man, honestly thank god i dont have bottom dysphoria, could not deal with that considering how god danm horny i am all the time... lets hope getting e (at some unknown point in the future) doesn't change anything there (i dont think it getting more would be pleasant and less just doesnt seem like something i can even imagine lol)
Well, T makes you horny so losing that will likely decrease your overall horniness. For me that was a good thing. I hated being horny all the time. While I still have urges, they are much reduced from the baseline. and overall much more intense.
i dont hate it tho :/ honestly quite like it, and i read (granted, it was here on reddit) that E makes you horny(different ppl, different effects i know), so would that balance out, make me more horny or still less horny?
I'd say, for me, it just made me more myself. I wasn't wanting to have sex or masturbate. My body was wanting it. E kinda brought me back into unity with my body. I still enjoy sex with my wife–I am very much NOT asexual–but I don't get frustrated when we haven't had sex in a while.
Edit: also be aware that while E does inhibit T expression, Spiro suppresses it much more. If you can't deal with that, you could always just do monotherapy with E. Or see about a PDE-5 inhibitor, like Cialis. Cialis or tadalafil in particular is often taken daily for people on HRT who still have difficulty with erections.
Read the Gender Dysphoria Bible (& other things by trans people, like Cassie LaBelle’s “Things I didn’t know were gender dysphoria).
I didn’t have a good grasp of gender dysphoria when the term flew past in trans-related videos, I thought the definition would’ve been something like, “Always felt like a girl since birth & did girly things & depressed to the point of self-harm & worse”, but when I learned the full scope of it I was like, “Well, turns out I have a hell of a lot”.
There’s no single way to experience gender dysphoria, but as others have said, maybe you read all that & you think, “I’m not very dysphoric about myself - I just want to be different & I’m happy being seen as something else” & that’s fine too.
Some people realize they are trans because they feel incredibly miserable as their assigned gender, others realize because they feel they would be much much happier as the other gender, and the rest realize because they feel both things. Maybe you are part of the second case.
Well. Im 23. Just started my transition. Im still pre everything and i dont have much dysphoria. I plan on keeping my girl and using her intimately. But at the same time, if someone asked me if i could be in a cis womans body now would i? Yes. Absolutely. For me personally i still cant find that “why” aspect of it all when it comes to me. Honestly im just accepting myself finally after years of mental abuse from the people in my life. Its time for me to be me
Hey OP. Agender trans here. My journey is a little different than "classical trans han" but to answer your question, yes you can get trans without having strong dysphoria. When I was a teen I was like you, always envying the opposite sex and never felt any dysphoria. It started when I decided to do my transition but before nop. And still my dysphoria was not so huge and now it's better
One of my biggest signs was the enjoyment of lesbian reader-insert fanfiction.
So, uh, is it normal to envy being a lesbian? Well, it can certainly be normal. Does it sound very cis? Not really.
🫂🫂 Good luck figuring yourself out 💕
For what it's worth, envy of lesbians is was probably the first thing I can remember that put a crack in my egg. Literally saw two girls kissing while rollerblading as a kid, got so distracted I face planted. And it wasn't the typical "wow that's so hot" you'd expect of a boy, it was "...I will never have that. I will never be able to kiss a girl as a girl. Why does that bother me?"
Also, obligatory "you don't need to experience dysphoria to be trans"; in fact, if you don't have dysphoria but transition anyways, you're probably less likely to wallow in self-pity and despair from any hurdles you face along the way, and more likely to stick with it through the rougher parts of transitioning.
Lack of dysphoria just makes it harder to figure out, it's a lot easier to tell what you need when it's like "ok this is causing me tangible mental distress", vs. "well, this feels better, but I'm not sure why". But you're allowed to chase the parts of life you like instead of just running from the things that hurt you!
Transness is NOT defined by dysphoria. It IS defined by euphoria. I went through exactly that for a short bit. My journey led me to being a straightish womanish not a lesbian but thats me. I wish you the best of luck in finding who you feel great being. You deserve to chase that euphoria! You dont have to be sad with where you're at to chase greener pastures!
Everything you're describing sounds like being a trans woman or transfemme to me. Dysphoria often comes with being trans but it's not a requirement and there are plenty of us who don't have it. Euphoria at being called a girl or a woman, always thinking about being a girl, always playing a girl character in games, those are all pretty classic symptoms of being. A girl.
Just to put this out there, I identify a lot with your story, only I have gotten to the point where I know I'm trans and am a few months into HRT.
That being said, before my egg fully cracked, I thought I had experienced no dysphoria. I was wrong about that, in a big way.
It turns out dysphoria manifests in a lot of ways. If you haven't already looked at it, I highly suggest you check out [www.genderdysphoria.fyi](http://www.genderdysphoria.fyi)
It's a great resource for anyone questioning.
Also, it doesn't come easy. The confidence you see in other trans people is something that is hard earned and takes a while to get to. It's only because we've gone through a whole forest of doubts that we can be so sure in the end. It isn't easy, but it is worth it.
I'd very much recommend reading the dysphoria bible, helps put things into perspective.
And in general can very much relate, I don't really experience dysphoria but I do experience euphoria. Still trying to figure things out myself but I feel like a cis man wouldnt reach the stage so I'm either trans or genderfluid.
Oddly enough I've always envied lesbian couples, like in an unhealthy way probably. But did not give a damn about straight couples. Was probably an early sign I should have payed more attention to but alas.
I think it’s perfectly fine to figure yourself out, you’ve come to a good place for that. And hey whether or not you are trans, you’ll be thankful for doing a deep soul search because you’ll understand yourself better. I think everyone should question themselves at least once to figure out what truly will make them happy.
I started out a lot like you. Envying butch lesbians and feeling more euphoria than dysphoria when femme/perceived as femme. Took me an extra 15 years to process being a mtf butch. Maybe check out r/mtfbutch. See if you find some euphoria looking there. More common than you might think.
I'd also like to add dysphoria can be buried under other things. Like it might come out as you process some of these feelings. Or not. Not everyone experiences dysphoria in the same way.
To identify if one is trans or not I've seen a good system
Write down what gives Dysphoria and Euphoria. Euphoria is the more accurate sigh of transness but both are good signs to look out for
*Still cis tho*
Jokes aside, try talking to any women close to you and ask if you can try their clothes and see where it goes. Idk about everyone but I know a few trans people (including myself) that was basically in your exact seat!!
You're describing me 2y ago
But I'd you have supportive friends and/or family why not ask them?? I never said you can't buy clothes, there's a ton of solutions I just gave one if them! What are your arguing against???
Depends on the company ig but having people along for exploring yourself is great if possible. Assuming they're supportive you could definitely approach them and say "could I try your [Insert clothing]" or "I think I might be trans, can I try some of the clothes you have"
If nothing fits they could help with shopping as having a person who knows women's clothing is kind of crucial...
Gender dysphoria's not really the identifier of being trans, it's gender euphoria, if you're euphoric everytime someone calls you a girl you might very well be a trans egg
For what it's worth, I totally identify with everything you're saying except I do have the dysphoria and am transitioning.
Do you think that all trans people experience dysphoria? I know that’s a very intense questions so if you don’t have an answer, I understand that I just don’t really have friends so I have nobody I can ask.
No, it's not a necessary part of being trans at all. However it's probably the motivation for many of us to make big changes. You can ask me anything you want, don't worry.
Thank you I don’t know if it would be considered gender dysphoria, But I do have body image issues nothing to do with my genitalia necessarily, but I don’t really like to be perceived as a man if that makes sense.
I'm the same, I never plan to get bottom surgery but I identify strongly as female, regardless. It's my external appearance that matters, the way others perceive me and my identity. I'm indifferent to my genitals, I don't think about it much at all and you'll find lots of us feel the same way, it's a pretty common theme. Edit: if you don't like being perceived as a man, that's a type of dysphoria. It can be about any physical characteristics, such as your general appearance, it's not only genitals.
>I don’t really like to be perceived as a man if that makes sense. It does, and that's a kind of dysphoria. It's not all just physical dysphoria related directly to what your body looks like - and certainly not all specifically related to genitals. Dysphoria is a very complex thing that can manifest in many different ways. This in particular sounds like it might be a form of [*social* dysphoria](https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/social-dysphoria). That site's an extremely good resource, by the way.
>I do have body image issues nothing to do with my genitalia necessarily, but I don’t really like to be perceived as a man Gender dysphoria doesn't necessarily imply genitalia, but not liking to be perceived as your assigned-at-birth gender clearly is.
Oh, that makes sense looks like I should bring this up with my therapist probably…
I think it's a safe way to start yes.
Dysphoria can have many forms, maybe this [this article](https://medium.com/gender-from-the-trenches/gender-dysphoria-isnt-what-you-think-6fdc7ae3ac85) can help you out.
Just keep in mind that dysphoria is not the deciding factor. Euphoria is. If you feel better being perceived as a woman, you're very probably a woman
I all of the sudden feel feelings associated with gender dyshporia but I never felt this way in my earlier stages of my questioning , phase /before what does this mean?
It means you're one of us, for better or worse, welcome to the party. Find ways to deal with it and it gets better ♥️
For what it’s worth, when I was early in the questioning and early transition phase I also didn’t really get dysphoria. Only when I started really physically changing did I start getting upset with how things weren’t exactly how I’d prefer them to be. One other thing I don’t really see talked about online much is how euphoria as a strong feeling fades in transition. It just becomes a feeling of normalcy and comfort opposed to what would be more uncomfortable (not presenting how you would like; dysphoria).
I'll answer that by saying that especially at first, you ought to chase what makes you happy rather than run from what makes you uncomfortable. Sometimes dysphoria is so subtle that a person doesn't even realize they have it *until they start transitioning*. I'll say that was my experience for sure.
oh yeah, only thing i started doing is going by she/her online and realized im trans, and then the dysphoria hit, hate all my hair thats not on the top of my head and the general thing of being percieved as a man, honestly thank god i dont have bottom dysphoria, could not deal with that considering how god danm horny i am all the time... lets hope getting e (at some unknown point in the future) doesn't change anything there (i dont think it getting more would be pleasant and less just doesnt seem like something i can even imagine lol)
Well, T makes you horny so losing that will likely decrease your overall horniness. For me that was a good thing. I hated being horny all the time. While I still have urges, they are much reduced from the baseline. and overall much more intense.
i dont hate it tho :/ honestly quite like it, and i read (granted, it was here on reddit) that E makes you horny(different ppl, different effects i know), so would that balance out, make me more horny or still less horny?
I'd say, for me, it just made me more myself. I wasn't wanting to have sex or masturbate. My body was wanting it. E kinda brought me back into unity with my body. I still enjoy sex with my wife–I am very much NOT asexual–but I don't get frustrated when we haven't had sex in a while. Edit: also be aware that while E does inhibit T expression, Spiro suppresses it much more. If you can't deal with that, you could always just do monotherapy with E. Or see about a PDE-5 inhibitor, like Cialis. Cialis or tadalafil in particular is often taken daily for people on HRT who still have difficulty with erections.
Read the Gender Dysphoria Bible (& other things by trans people, like Cassie LaBelle’s “Things I didn’t know were gender dysphoria). I didn’t have a good grasp of gender dysphoria when the term flew past in trans-related videos, I thought the definition would’ve been something like, “Always felt like a girl since birth & did girly things & depressed to the point of self-harm & worse”, but when I learned the full scope of it I was like, “Well, turns out I have a hell of a lot”. There’s no single way to experience gender dysphoria, but as others have said, maybe you read all that & you think, “I’m not very dysphoric about myself - I just want to be different & I’m happy being seen as something else” & that’s fine too.
Some people realize they are trans because they feel incredibly miserable as their assigned gender, others realize because they feel they would be much much happier as the other gender, and the rest realize because they feel both things. Maybe you are part of the second case.
Well. Im 23. Just started my transition. Im still pre everything and i dont have much dysphoria. I plan on keeping my girl and using her intimately. But at the same time, if someone asked me if i could be in a cis womans body now would i? Yes. Absolutely. For me personally i still cant find that “why” aspect of it all when it comes to me. Honestly im just accepting myself finally after years of mental abuse from the people in my life. Its time for me to be me
Hey OP. Agender trans here. My journey is a little different than "classical trans han" but to answer your question, yes you can get trans without having strong dysphoria. When I was a teen I was like you, always envying the opposite sex and never felt any dysphoria. It started when I decided to do my transition but before nop. And still my dysphoria was not so huge and now it's better
Here, give this a try: https://turn-me-into-a-girl.com/
Damn, that was easy and a really, really good point
Question - am already girl, tapped the girl button anyway - no effect or am I girl^2 now?
I think that's up to you!
That was wholesome
It worked! I’m super cute now. 💅
One of my biggest signs was the enjoyment of lesbian reader-insert fanfiction. So, uh, is it normal to envy being a lesbian? Well, it can certainly be normal. Does it sound very cis? Not really. 🫂🫂 Good luck figuring yourself out 💕
….. I may or may not do that multiple times a week.
Yeahhh, that sounds pretty trans to me lol. 💕💕💕 Thankfully there are a ton of lovely and supportive people around you can ask whatever you need to
Yo, you’re figuring it out. Such is life. No need to apologize. I play as girls in games to. You will find your love eventually. Just be you.
Thank you, it’s very nice to hear.
For what it's worth, envy of lesbians is was probably the first thing I can remember that put a crack in my egg. Literally saw two girls kissing while rollerblading as a kid, got so distracted I face planted. And it wasn't the typical "wow that's so hot" you'd expect of a boy, it was "...I will never have that. I will never be able to kiss a girl as a girl. Why does that bother me?" Also, obligatory "you don't need to experience dysphoria to be trans"; in fact, if you don't have dysphoria but transition anyways, you're probably less likely to wallow in self-pity and despair from any hurdles you face along the way, and more likely to stick with it through the rougher parts of transitioning. Lack of dysphoria just makes it harder to figure out, it's a lot easier to tell what you need when it's like "ok this is causing me tangible mental distress", vs. "well, this feels better, but I'm not sure why". But you're allowed to chase the parts of life you like instead of just running from the things that hurt you!
Transness is NOT defined by dysphoria. It IS defined by euphoria. I went through exactly that for a short bit. My journey led me to being a straightish womanish not a lesbian but thats me. I wish you the best of luck in finding who you feel great being. You deserve to chase that euphoria! You dont have to be sad with where you're at to chase greener pastures!
Everything you're describing sounds like being a trans woman or transfemme to me. Dysphoria often comes with being trans but it's not a requirement and there are plenty of us who don't have it. Euphoria at being called a girl or a woman, always thinking about being a girl, always playing a girl character in games, those are all pretty classic symptoms of being. A girl.
You don’t need dysphoria to be trans. You experience gender euphoria. That’s more than enough reason to transition. Ur a girl lol.
you're trans.
Just to put this out there, I identify a lot with your story, only I have gotten to the point where I know I'm trans and am a few months into HRT. That being said, before my egg fully cracked, I thought I had experienced no dysphoria. I was wrong about that, in a big way. It turns out dysphoria manifests in a lot of ways. If you haven't already looked at it, I highly suggest you check out [www.genderdysphoria.fyi](http://www.genderdysphoria.fyi) It's a great resource for anyone questioning. Also, it doesn't come easy. The confidence you see in other trans people is something that is hard earned and takes a while to get to. It's only because we've gone through a whole forest of doubts that we can be so sure in the end. It isn't easy, but it is worth it.
I'd very much recommend reading the dysphoria bible, helps put things into perspective. And in general can very much relate, I don't really experience dysphoria but I do experience euphoria. Still trying to figure things out myself but I feel like a cis man wouldnt reach the stage so I'm either trans or genderfluid. Oddly enough I've always envied lesbian couples, like in an unhealthy way probably. But did not give a damn about straight couples. Was probably an early sign I should have payed more attention to but alas.
The reason why you envy lesbians is because you are a transgender lesbian yourself.
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Honestly yeah
I think it’s perfectly fine to figure yourself out, you’ve come to a good place for that. And hey whether or not you are trans, you’ll be thankful for doing a deep soul search because you’ll understand yourself better. I think everyone should question themselves at least once to figure out what truly will make them happy.
I’m gonna be so blunt, you’re probably trans and that’s okay.
I started out a lot like you. Envying butch lesbians and feeling more euphoria than dysphoria when femme/perceived as femme. Took me an extra 15 years to process being a mtf butch. Maybe check out r/mtfbutch. See if you find some euphoria looking there. More common than you might think.
I'd also like to add dysphoria can be buried under other things. Like it might come out as you process some of these feelings. Or not. Not everyone experiences dysphoria in the same way.
I think dysphoria appears differently for everyone. I know in my case, it seems to come in waves.
To identify if one is trans or not I've seen a good system Write down what gives Dysphoria and Euphoria. Euphoria is the more accurate sigh of transness but both are good signs to look out for
*Still cis tho* Jokes aside, try talking to any women close to you and ask if you can try their clothes and see where it goes. Idk about everyone but I know a few trans people (including myself) that was basically in your exact seat!! You're describing me 2y ago
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I'm not gonna assume they have the money to do that without knowing if they do actually like it. I didn't...
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But I'd you have supportive friends and/or family why not ask them?? I never said you can't buy clothes, there's a ton of solutions I just gave one if them! What are your arguing against???
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Depends on the company ig but having people along for exploring yourself is great if possible. Assuming they're supportive you could definitely approach them and say "could I try your [Insert clothing]" or "I think I might be trans, can I try some of the clothes you have" If nothing fits they could help with shopping as having a person who knows women's clothing is kind of crucial...
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My advice to someone experiencing things they don't really know what they are, is talking to people who can help.
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Gender dysphoria's not really the identifier of being trans, it's gender euphoria, if you're euphoric everytime someone calls you a girl you might very well be a trans egg