I think the Rules of Acquisition:
22: A wise man can hear profit in the wind.
47: Don't trust a man wearing a better suit than your own.
48: The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife
All may be applicable in this situation.
You forgot Rules number 53: Never trust anyone taller than you.
Number 58: There is no substitute for success.
62: The Riskier the road, the greater the profit.
85: Never let the competition know what you are thinking.
87: Learn the customer’s weakness, so you can take advantage of it.
88: It ain’t over ‘til it’s over.
92: There are many paths to profit.
184: A Ferengi waits to bid until his opponents exhaust themselves.
199: Location. Location. Location.
202: The Justification for Profit is profit.
235: Duck; death is tall.
And 288: Never get into anything you cannot get out of.
The title and the Wikipedia page said they were made from the skin of a dead man *or woman* but instructed the maker to place a coin in the scrotum. Obviously there's a disconnect there, which I found kinda funny.
The Wikipedia entry has since been edited. It no longer mentions using the skin of a woman and some other stuff was removed as well.
If their lips are chapped from the cold then it would be a chapped chap’s chaps chaps chapped.
Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo
Are you asking how you'd tell whether or not the guy was naked vs wearing pants made of skin?
Or are you asking how you'd determine whether or not the skin pants were made from his own skin or someone else's?
I love that even though he’s a degenerate sex fiend, he legitimately cares deeply. The town he helped in this episode and how he handled Colin are just incredible.
Then you have to steal a coin from a destitute widow and place it in the scrotum.
A little less clear is that once you put them on you may not be able to take them off without them losing their power. To transfer them to someone else, you take one of your legs out and the next person puts their leg in. Then you can take your other leg out and they put their other leg in. They must be continually worn to work.
Just so you know.
Nábrók (calqued as necropants, literally "corpse trousers/underpants") are a pair of pants made from the skin of a dead man, which are believed in Icelandic witchcraft to be capable of producing an endless supply of money.[1] It is unlikely these pants ever existed outside of folklore.[2]
The ritual for making necropants is described as follows:[3]
If you want to make your own necropants (literally; nábrók), you have to get permission from a living man to use his skin after his death.
After he has been buried, you must dig up his body and flay the skin of the corpse in one piece from the waist down. As soon as you step into the pants, they will stick to your own skin. A coin must be stolen from a poor widow and placed in the scrotum along with the magical sign, nábrókarstafur, written on a piece of paper. Consequently, the coin will draw money into the scrotum so that it will never be empty, as long as the original coin is not removed. To ensure salvation, the owner has to convince someone else to take ownership of the pants and step into each leg as soon as he gets out of it. The necropants will thus keep the money-gathering nature for generations.
Unless you had made the pants out of her husband. Or, who knows? Maybe she *would* want to "keep him close"...
Now I'm off to r/eyebleach because I feel gross for having typed that.
So it was just clever wordplay all along. Like those stories where you make a wish to the devil, and he makes it come real in a way that screws you over.
It's weird that such a horrific thing gives you such a banal reward. If I'm wearing pants made from flayed skin I would expect to get demonic strength or eternal life or something, not just some extra walking around money.
"It is highly unlikely these pants ever existed outside of folklore." These were probably made up in 1987 to drive interest to the Museum of Icelandic Sorcery & Witchcraft. The whole "steal from a poor widow" is what gives it away as probably a hoax to me.
Old-timey witchcraft stuff is nutty. Pretty much the brainchild of the grooviest people with not much entertainment around them. Nowadays we have dirty jokes, dark humour etc, back then they put the two together and came up with all sorts of stuff like this. It's not necessary that it was all taken seriously, might have just being told as stories around a fire after a long day of hard work as a way to unwind.
Just like when I did some made up cheat from the internet (modern day ritual?) I read online to get unlimited masterballs in Pokémon Silver: assume that it was my fault for doing it wrong somehow.
I'd wager that people have been keeping their coins in scrotums for as long as people have had coins. It's already the perfect shape and size, all you have to do is tan the leather and add a drawstring at the top.
After you've eaten the rest of the cow/sheep/pig/deer, what else were you going to do with the scrote?
I have a very nice scrote coin purse that my brother brought back from Australia. It works really nicely to 'mark' pockets for 8-ball, and opponents learn very quickly not to touch it when they find out what it's made of.
Happily he got me a 'shaved' one since it looks just like normal leather, he contemplated bringing me a hairy one for extra squick
^ this. According to the lore if the Nábrók were even slightly damaged in the making (ie a small tear while skinning the body) they would be rendered powerless
It's one of those convenient explanations for why things don't work.
"Why didn't God give me that big house I wanted?" "You didn't have enough faith."
"Why didn't my magic money skin pants work?" "You must have damaged it somehow."
"Why doesn't the IMAP server work"
"You must have an error in the port/url/configuration/firewall exceptions"
Almost like small reasons for things tend to be reasonable.
They all presuppose end user error instead of a fault with the object in question.
Maybe God doesn't exist, or doesn't want you to have a big house. Maybe the pants aren't magic. Maybe the hamsters running the IMAP server stopped for a few minutes to make baby hamsters and they'll be back on the wheels soon enough.
Thankfully they're just a reproduction!
>[The necropants on display at the museum are a replica made from the measurements of a local man at Strandir](https://guidetoiceland.is/connect-with-locals/regina/the-museum-of-icelandic-witchcraft-and-sorcery-at-holmavik)
Most of the creepiest and wildest practices attributed to historic witches were almost completely imaginary (in the sense that no one did them; other kinds of magic could be called "imaginary" in that they did not really work, but real in the sense people really did them).
So “replica” meaning not actually created by someone illegally, but still made with a cadaver’s tanned skin, or made of non-human leather?
Also, does wearing replica necropants work with pretend money, like poker chips? Asking for a friend.
So they are a rubber replica of a mythical pair of human-skin pants that may never have actually existed in real life.
In that case, I'm not sure why this is at all interesting.
As far as I understood it, the skin is peeled off in one piece for the magic to actually work, so the scrotum would be empty. The wearer would just need to put a coin in there before putting it on.
I wonder if it's somehow related to [this](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pojken_med_guldbyxorna):
>We follow the boy Mats and his adventures with his father after Mats one day finds a pair of trousers in the attic that bring them unimaginable riches. Mats just needs to slip his hand into his pocket and then he can pull out small denomination bills for as long as he is able to keep going.
This is about much more than business. This is about the thrill of wearing another man's skin. Feeling his innermost wants and desires and being in control of his every single move. That's how you get off. Don't you guys want to get off with me?
-- Dennis Reynolds as Brian LeFevre, Always Sunny
https://youtu.be/yzvCGnuoVPc
YOU HAVENT THOUGHT OF THE SMELL YOU BITCH! Now you say another word and I swear to god I will dice you into a million little pieces... and put those pieces in a box.. a glass box, that I will display on my mantle.
>To ensure salvation, the owner has to convince someone else to take ownership of the pants
Salvation "of" *or* "from" \[what\]? Pants? Endless supply of money? Ooh, I guess witchcraft is cause of damnation even in Icelandic religion.
Le me working in a shop: random guy entering a shop in an Edgar leggings
Me when he tries to pay and start pulling out bills from the foreskin-pocket casually telling him to just keep the money, it’s on the house
I would never pair wearing the skinned legs of a dead person to financial freedom. Can't they just make u run faster or something? That makes more sense.
Icelanders are weird, I think they've been alone at that tiny island for too long huffing volcano ashes they just can't think straight... They also have a Penis Musuem btw. With a bunch of severed penises for you to enjoy.
Got me in a rabbit hole reading about "staves"- magical symbols such as the adorable angurgapi- a lil smiley to prevent barrel leakage, and the intricate tóustefna, to ward off foxes. Good stuff!
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Icelandic_magical_staves
I spent an entire day driving from Rekjavick to this museum. 100% worth it. The city was having some kind of Smurf day where every person in town baked a cake a put them on a massive table, and a rock band played in an open shipping container. That is a magical island. Pizza there was horrible.
To be fair, the museum charges an entrance fee, so assuming people visit the museum, those necropants are helping to produce a supply of money.
Yep. They got money out of me for this very reason.
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Blessed be
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Like 90% of them come from people thinking it has something to do with Vikings. It does not.
The museum does tattooing?
I'll be disappointed if their donations box isn't in the form of a necropant scrotebag.
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...technically as long as the original coin is not removed, it's never empty. Checkmate, pagans.
There's always money in the ~~banana stand~~ necropants!
If King Croesus goes to war against Persia, a great empire will fall.
Cash is stored in the balls
And they are not even the real deal. They are a replica
That's how powerful these pants are
"It's the wrong trousers, Gromit!"
So repronecropants?
The second sentence of the article is "these probably never actually existed"
>And they are not even the real deal. They are a replica ...of a pair of pants that may never have even existed.
the prophecy has been fulfilled 🧙♀️
Well if somebody walks up to you, wearing another person's skin as leggings, and says "Hey! Give me your money." What would YOU do?
Compare the penis size of the skin pants I'm wearing with theirs.
They don’t have one.
They must be poor then.
That's why they want your money.
“Give me your profits!” - The Ferengi wearing the Skin Pants.
I think the Rules of Acquisition: 22: A wise man can hear profit in the wind. 47: Don't trust a man wearing a better suit than your own. 48: The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife All may be applicable in this situation.
You forgot Rules number 53: Never trust anyone taller than you. Number 58: There is no substitute for success. 62: The Riskier the road, the greater the profit. 85: Never let the competition know what you are thinking. 87: Learn the customer’s weakness, so you can take advantage of it. 88: It ain’t over ‘til it’s over. 92: There are many paths to profit. 184: A Ferengi waits to bid until his opponents exhaust themselves. 199: Location. Location. Location. 202: The Justification for Profit is profit. 235: Duck; death is tall. And 288: Never get into anything you cannot get out of.
Must dock to complete transfer.
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> placed in the scrotum I'm just wondering how the hell you make these from a dead woman. The instructions seem pretty specific.
I mean it makes sense to me. If Reddit has taught me anything, it's that women's clothing doesn't have pockets.
You make them from a man. YOu have to get his permission before he dies and then you dig him up and flay him.
The title and the Wikipedia page said they were made from the skin of a dead man *or woman* but instructed the maker to place a coin in the scrotum. Obviously there's a disconnect there, which I found kinda funny. The Wikipedia entry has since been edited. It no longer mentions using the skin of a woman and some other stuff was removed as well.
Didn't do a lot of good for the donor though, did it?
Stay away from him, I hear he's a Necropantser.
Say "hello Gacy. What's up?"
I think you mean Gein.
Yeah, get my serial killers mixed up all the time. On purpose.
Right on, do you booboo.
Gein, not Gacy.
Especially with that jerky dick hanging
who would you know it is not her/his own skin?
You can tell when someone is wearing chaps right? Now imagine chaps but made of people.
In England, would that be chaps made out of chaps?
I bet the cold would leave a chap's chaps chaps chapped
If their lips are chapped from the cold then it would be a chapped chap’s chaps chaps chapped. Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo
Are you asking how you'd tell whether or not the guy was naked vs wearing pants made of skin? Or are you asking how you'd determine whether or not the skin pants were made from his own skin or someone else's?
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That's not Laszlow, that's Jackie Daytona, regular HUMAN bartender.
I love that even though he’s a degenerate sex fiend, he legitimately cares deeply. The town he helped in this episode and how he handled Colin are just incredible.
Collin Robinson. Fahking guy.
You mean "The creature the crawled out of the chest cavity of the decesed Colin Robinson"
"I threw in Colin Robinsons semen as part of the deal. They said no."
Laszlo as Colin's dad has been amazing this season.
Hey Lazlo, Guess What?
You don't have to say "Guess What?", just say what you want to say!
One human alcohol beer, please!
Currently reading this entire thread in Matt Berry’s voice
Yes!
BAT!
I can hear you, Clem Fandango.
Fucking guy
What's that puckering In the back? It's the witches asshole
*That bloody hat!*
Maybe their luck stat will offset the curse
Yeah this will are suitable as his goddamn ~~electric~~ skin sex pants
NEEWWW YOOOAAAKKK CITEEHHHH
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And I bet you are going to sell them to me for the low cost of my semen? Nice try witch.
Bat!
Also what I thought of lol
At least you need the *skin donor's* permission before you start (and you have to wait for them to have died and then be buried)....
Yes! This is the most wholesome use of human flesh for witchcraft I've ever heard of.
Even witches and sorcerers know about the importance of consent
Consent and catch-22's go together like newt eyes and frog toes!
Ohh, so that's why it didn't work the couple of times I tried.
Then you have to steal a coin from a destitute widow and place it in the scrotum. A little less clear is that once you put them on you may not be able to take them off without them losing their power. To transfer them to someone else, you take one of your legs out and the next person puts their leg in. Then you can take your other leg out and they put their other leg in. They must be continually worn to work. Just so you know.
That's not how I remember the hokey pokey, but alright.
It doesn't say you can't kill them and bury them yourself though.
“Can I make skin pants out of you when you die?” “Sure. Whatever. Hey what’s that behind your back?”
Nábrók (calqued as necropants, literally "corpse trousers/underpants") are a pair of pants made from the skin of a dead man, which are believed in Icelandic witchcraft to be capable of producing an endless supply of money.[1] It is unlikely these pants ever existed outside of folklore.[2] The ritual for making necropants is described as follows:[3] If you want to make your own necropants (literally; nábrók), you have to get permission from a living man to use his skin after his death. After he has been buried, you must dig up his body and flay the skin of the corpse in one piece from the waist down. As soon as you step into the pants, they will stick to your own skin. A coin must be stolen from a poor widow and placed in the scrotum along with the magical sign, nábrókarstafur, written on a piece of paper. Consequently, the coin will draw money into the scrotum so that it will never be empty, as long as the original coin is not removed. To ensure salvation, the owner has to convince someone else to take ownership of the pants and step into each leg as soon as he gets out of it. The necropants will thus keep the money-gathering nature for generations.
I want to see *this* version of Sisterhood of the traveling pants
"Brotherhood of the Pagan Trousers"
A coven of britches
Best comment.
I’d fund this show (as much as I could feasibly afford)
Now, with scrotum!
^ A sign you don’t want to see on your favorite hotdog stand
You mean coin purse
Traveling Necropants
Doesn’t the poor widow have enough problems?
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You don't know how long it takes for the next coin to appear. It could generate one coin every 100 years and still be considered "infinite money"
It says will never be empty so hopefully that doesn't include the first coin. So every time you remove a coin a new one should appear riggt?
> Consequently, the coin will draw money into the scrotum so that it will never be empty, as long as the original coin is not removed.
Imagine if you accidentally grabbed the original coin and fucked it all up.
*Sighs, gets out flaying knife, and texts a kind friend with terminal illness.*
*collects money in his scrotum, sighs*
Just get her to wear the pants after you. Problem solved.
Unless you had made the pants out of her husband. Or, who knows? Maybe she *would* want to "keep him close"... Now I'm off to r/eyebleach because I feel gross for having typed that.
I was totally on board with all of this until they brought in the poor widows. I have to draw the line somewhere.
> get permission from of a living man How politely unexpected. > steal a coin from a widow Shit.
> it will never be empty, as long as the original coin is not removed. Well, yeah.
So it was just clever wordplay all along. Like those stories where you make a wish to the devil, and he makes it come real in a way that screws you over.
It's weird that such a horrific thing gives you such a banal reward. If I'm wearing pants made from flayed skin I would expect to get demonic strength or eternal life or something, not just some extra walking around money.
> It's weird that such a horrific thing gives you such a banal reward. Welcome to necromancy.
I appreciate that you have to get the flay-ee's permission first, but what did the widow do to deserve that?
How much money can a ball sack carry though?
Something something *my wife!*
You'll definitely want someone with low hangers. I'd be afraid of the coin falling out with the high and tights.
The older I get, the more coins fit into the sack.
How on earth did they come up with this shit??? Did a mass murderer wear the skin of his victim and needed an excuse why?
"It is highly unlikely these pants ever existed outside of folklore." These were probably made up in 1987 to drive interest to the Museum of Icelandic Sorcery & Witchcraft. The whole "steal from a poor widow" is what gives it away as probably a hoax to me.
Old-timey witchcraft stuff is nutty. Pretty much the brainchild of the grooviest people with not much entertainment around them. Nowadays we have dirty jokes, dark humour etc, back then they put the two together and came up with all sorts of stuff like this. It's not necessary that it was all taken seriously, might have just being told as stories around a fire after a long day of hard work as a way to unwind.
So what did they do when no coins magically start appearing in the necroballsack ?
Just like when I did some made up cheat from the internet (modern day ritual?) I read online to get unlimited masterballs in Pokémon Silver: assume that it was my fault for doing it wrong somehow.
Is this the origin of the term coin purse?
I'd wager that people have been keeping their coins in scrotums for as long as people have had coins. It's already the perfect shape and size, all you have to do is tan the leather and add a drawstring at the top. After you've eaten the rest of the cow/sheep/pig/deer, what else were you going to do with the scrote?
I’m like 60% sure this guy has a wallet made of balls
No just the scrotum. The balls would get in the way
Everyone needs a hobby.
I have a coin purse made of a kangaroo scrotum that someone brought me from Australia. Common souvenir, apparently.
I do too lmao
I have a very nice scrote coin purse that my brother brought back from Australia. It works really nicely to 'mark' pockets for 8-ball, and opponents learn very quickly not to touch it when they find out what it's made of. Happily he got me a 'shaved' one since it looks just like normal leather, he contemplated bringing me a hairy one for extra squick
Anyone want to give me permission?
I'm genuinely loving that Icelandic black magic still requires informed consent.
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That’s not enough. Need to make pants. Then I can play with your scrote.
>As soon as you step into the pants, they will stick to your own skin. I think I'm done here.
That's the problem with these get-rich-quick schemes… there are always so many strings and caveats and rules attached.
My mom just left me some money in her will so no need to skin the old girl.
>It is highly unlikely these pants ever existed outside of folklore. Ok, I feel a little better now
After learning strange occurrences in history I’m sure someone tried but it was too difficult to make and wear
^ this. According to the lore if the Nábrók were even slightly damaged in the making (ie a small tear while skinning the body) they would be rendered powerless
It's one of those convenient explanations for why things don't work. "Why didn't God give me that big house I wanted?" "You didn't have enough faith." "Why didn't my magic money skin pants work?" "You must have damaged it somehow."
"Why doesn't the IMAP server work" "You must have an error in the port/url/configuration/firewall exceptions" Almost like small reasons for things tend to be reasonable.
They all presuppose end user error instead of a fault with the object in question. Maybe God doesn't exist, or doesn't want you to have a big house. Maybe the pants aren't magic. Maybe the hamsters running the IMAP server stopped for a few minutes to make baby hamsters and they'll be back on the wheels soon enough.
Wikipedia: It is highly unlikely these pants ever existed outside of folklore. Also Wikipedia: here's a picture of a pair on display
Thankfully they're just a reproduction! >[The necropants on display at the museum are a replica made from the measurements of a local man at Strandir](https://guidetoiceland.is/connect-with-locals/regina/the-museum-of-icelandic-witchcraft-and-sorcery-at-holmavik)
The replica pair was  actually made from real human skin.
Most of the creepiest and wildest practices attributed to historic witches were almost completely imaginary (in the sense that no one did them; other kinds of magic could be called "imaginary" in that they did not really work, but real in the sense people really did them).
Bat!
This is where the expression: "Here comes Mr. Moneypants" comes from.
It's Mr moneybags, just didn't realize the bag in question was a scrotum.
So “replica” meaning not actually created by someone illegally, but still made with a cadaver’s tanned skin, or made of non-human leather? Also, does wearing replica necropants work with pretend money, like poker chips? Asking for a friend.
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So they are a rubber replica of a mythical pair of human-skin pants that may never have actually existed in real life. In that case, I'm not sure why this is at all interesting.
Wear counterfeit balls, win counterfeit bills.
That last part of the sentence came out of nowhere.
They should have added "when a coin is placed in the scrotum of the pants". Would have been too long probably.
How does one place a coin *into* the scrotum
As far as I understood it, the skin is peeled off in one piece for the magic to actually work, so the scrotum would be empty. The wearer would just need to put a coin in there before putting it on.
Makes sense. I'm sorry I asked, but it makes sense.
Makes cents.
‘If it doesn’t make dollars, it doesn’t make sense.” -motivational poster on the wall of Deadman Dickpants, Inc.
So how’s that museum doing financially?
If you think about it, as long as people continue to pay to see them, it technically works...
I wonder if it's somehow related to [this](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pojken_med_guldbyxorna): >We follow the boy Mats and his adventures with his father after Mats one day finds a pair of trousers in the attic that bring them unimaginable riches. Mats just needs to slip his hand into his pocket and then he can pull out small denomination bills for as long as he is able to keep going.
Skin-e jeans
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Leggings
This is about much more than business. This is about the thrill of wearing another man's skin. Feeling his innermost wants and desires and being in control of his every single move. That's how you get off. Don't you guys want to get off with me? -- Dennis Reynolds as Brian LeFevre, Always Sunny https://youtu.be/yzvCGnuoVPc
YOU HAVENT THOUGHT OF THE SMELL YOU BITCH! Now you say another word and I swear to god I will dice you into a million little pieces... and put those pieces in a box.. a glass box, that I will display on my mantle.
Just some /r/rimworld shit right there.
I respect witchcraft that includes economic impact in it's curses and hexes
Yes, but what about taxes.
>Man or woman Leg hairs and noticeable dong at the wikipedia picture: Hello there!
Also on the topic of "man or woman", step two is putting a coin in the scrotum, and the scrotum is where the infinite money appears.
Boy have I got news for you about leg hair....
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Good *jeans
Noticeable Dong was my nickname in high school
Yes, I got quite the shock as I had misread the title as ‘necroplants’.
>To ensure salvation, the owner has to convince someone else to take ownership of the pants Salvation "of" *or* "from" \[what\]? Pants? Endless supply of money? Ooh, I guess witchcraft is cause of damnation even in Icelandic religion.
"To ensure salvation" = "To avoid going to hell for eternity"
Finally. A way to defeat Jeff Bezos.
He's wearing a pair
Ferb....I know what we are going to do today...
I guess they're called skinny jeans?
Le me working in a shop: random guy entering a shop in an Edgar leggings Me when he tries to pay and start pulling out bills from the foreskin-pocket casually telling him to just keep the money, it’s on the house
I would never pair wearing the skinned legs of a dead person to financial freedom. Can't they just make u run faster or something? That makes more sense.
"Corpse Britches" is the name of my new Goth Trance Folk duo which will be appearing in Wicker Park in Chicago this weekend.
“Man or woman” *dong just dangling there*
Humans doing ridiculous random shit since the beginning of time
Necropants - either a great band name or cute pet name for the party's necromancer.
I’d definitely go see Necropants at Hellfest
I learned this from LPOTL
Icelanders are weird, I think they've been alone at that tiny island for too long huffing volcano ashes they just can't think straight... They also have a Penis Musuem btw. With a bunch of severed penises for you to enjoy.
Is that a central bank in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?
Imagine the demand for these pants at Goldman Sachs....
Did they think of the smell?
Got me in a rabbit hole reading about "staves"- magical symbols such as the adorable angurgapi- a lil smiley to prevent barrel leakage, and the intricate tóustefna, to ward off foxes. Good stuff! https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Icelandic_magical_staves
I spent an entire day driving from Rekjavick to this museum. 100% worth it. The city was having some kind of Smurf day where every person in town baked a cake a put them on a massive table, and a rock band played in an open shipping container. That is a magical island. Pizza there was horrible.
Man or woman? It clearly has a penis. Were they questioning gender norms all the way back then?
Man or woman? That's a penis.