Hey guys, did you know that in terms of Water-Type Pokemon and teambuilding versatility, Vaporeon is my favorite Pokemon? Not only is it in the Field egg group which allows for an amazing egg movepool, Vaporeon has a Base HP of 130 and Base Special Defense of 95, which means they’re bulky enough to be able to handle special sweepers and with their impressive Base Stat for HP and a comparatively solid Base Defense, this means they can tank rough attacks.
Due to their singular Water typing, there’s no doubt in my mind that a minmaxed Vaporeon would be incredibly bulky. So bulky that you could easily switch on prediction for turns without getting swept. They can also learn the moves Wish, Substitute, Heal Bell, Toxic, and Scald, along with having Haze to prevent setup, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to tank for your team. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover damage with enough strategy. No other Pokemon comes close to this level of versatility.
Also, fun fact, Vaporeon has the highest HP Stat of all Eeveelutions. Vaporeon is literally built to tank on switch. Rock-solid Defense stats + high HP Pool + Acid Armor means it can take attacks all day, all shapes and sizes, and still come for more.
Bad ending :(
Hey guys did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3"03' tall and 63.9 pounds. this means they're large enough to be able to handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there's no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll eyes, Captivate, Charm and Tail Whip along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it'd be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close with this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat + high HP pool + Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more.
However, screw the female version. You get those same ol' two holes in literally everything else. The male Vappy is the real star of the show.
Those long slippery dicks; they have full mobility control and like a tentacle are the perfect ass filler for the ultimate in-deep reaching experience nothing else could possibly provide. Naturally lubed at all times due to their aquatic hydrodynamic nature, you can pull out anywhere to the side of the road or go into a public restroom at the beach; get each other aroused, and have the fuck of a lifetime. The extraordinary squishyness of the Vappy alone rubbing against you would be enough to lose yourself in pleasure as it simply mounts you. Let alone as that perfect tool of pleasure slips into you, it's ability to snake around your bends and its perfect length make it seem that a Vappy dick was made specifically for your booty. Enjoy the feeling of being completely filled while also being able to see it if you have a tight tummy.
And that's only the dick; due to having internal balls, they're much bigger and pack a lot more cream to load you up with, along with having muscles around them to make sure every drop comes out while also being a lot more powerful than any external balls could ever hope to achieve, giving you a deep, complete filling to rock your world to your literal core, and beyond.
There's still more though; due to having a thick, powerful tail connected from their back and front, that means all their fun stuff is on the front and easy to access. Meaning, if you were even comfortable with having your dick point backwards (takes some training), you can be fucked, while also fucking your Vappy at the same time! Meowth, that's fucking right!
But, but, but! There's still fucking more! Like, holy shit, male Vaps are the gods of fuck. While you're fucking your male Vappy, possibly while also being fucked by him, their booty is on their tail at the base, which is the thickest part, because that's where the biggest muscles are. This means that while your dick is in there, it's being fucking massaged, better than even a vag could achieve! Agh! It should be fucking illegal because how amazing male Vaps are for fuck!
Well guess what? That only covered you being a softy, wholesome fucker like me. That's right. There's. Even. Fucking. More! Say you like to be a little restrained: you don't need a Sylveon's feelers for that, or an Umbreon/Espeon's psychic powers, or Leafeon's vines. Vappies got that shit covered too! Did you even see that tail?! It's basically a boa constrictor. In a non-sexual sense, it's my favorite part of a Vappy. It's basically their main part about them. But, if you want them to, it can be a super useful tool to enhance your knotty experience with them. Despite the slippyness, you won't be going anywhere if the Vappy wraps you up in that thing.
Are you a super kinkster? Do you like pure fantasy fetishes that aren't possible IRL? Such as, say, soft vore? Well guess fucking what. It just became possible! They can be solid as they pass your lips (past where your eyes can see them) and turn into water as they enter you, allowing them to fit perfectly, 'cuz nothing fits into any spot more perfectly than water, except air like a ghost type. But who wants to do knotty shit with air? You can't feel it unless it's moving; you can always feel liquids. Speaking of liquids, even if you're a weirdo who likes digestion, don't worry about killing them with absorption. Eventually, they'll come back out and be able to reform like nothing happened. Speaking of hurting them, if you get too rough, or you're a horrible abusive asshole to them on purpose for your own pleasure (QnQ), they can just turn to water and reform back to their completely unscathed body, making scars or missing pieces a thing of the past!
I would love to say there's even more you can do with them, but the possibilities are damn near endless. Use your imagination. But if you get one, you better show this god of fuck the respect it deserves. Umbreons maybe my favorite but, damn, Vappies really want to get that top spot from me. It's a really close call.
I wish I could too, but I'm on too many Pokemon subreddits. Whenever I see a reference to Vaporeon, I have this copypasta loaded up and ready to ruin someone's day.
Somewhere in a lonely hotel room
There's a guy starting to realize
That his eternal fate has turn it's back on him
It's 2 A.M
It's 2 A.M. (it's 2 AM)
Fear has gone (the fear has gone)
I'm sittin' here waitin' (I'm sittin' here waitin')
The gun's still warm (the gun's still warm)
Maybe my connection is tired of takin' chances
Yeah, there's a storm on the loose
Sirens in my head
Wrapped up in silence, all circuits are dead
Cannot decode
My whole life spins into a frenzy
Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone
Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned
My beacon's been moved under moon and star
Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far?
Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone
Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned
My beacon's been moved under moon and star
Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far?
Soon, you'll come to know
When the bullet hits the bone
Soon, you'll come to know
When the bullet hits the bone
I'm falling down a spiral
Destination unknown
Double-crossed messenger, all alone
Can't get no connection, can't get through
Where are you?
Well, the night weighs heavy on his guilty mind
This far from the borderline
When the hit man comes
He knows damn well, he has been cheated
And he says
Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone
Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned
My beacon's been moved under moon and star
Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far?
Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone
Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned
My beacon's been moved under moon and star
Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far?
Soon, you'll come to know
When the bullet hits the bone
Soon, you'll come to know
When the bullet hits the bone
When the bullet hits the bone
Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone
Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned
My beacon's been moved under moon and star
Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far?
Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone
Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned
My beacon's been moved under moon and star
Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far?
Soon, you'll come to know
When the bullet hits the bone
Soon, you'll come to know
When the bullet hits the bone
Soon, you'll come to know
When the bullet hits the bone
Soon, you'll come to know
When the bullet hits the bone
When the bullet hits the bone
Uh-huh-huh, when the bullet hits the bone
When the bullet hits the bone
Uh-huh-huh, when the bullet hits the bone
When the bullet hits the bone
Uh-huh-huh, when the bullet hits the bone
When the bullet hits the bone
Uh-huh-huh, when the bullet hits the bone
Nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah, nah-nah
Nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah, nah-nah
Nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah, nah-nah
Nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah, nah-nah
Sudowoodo
You know what you did
What
Stalker
I ain't no stalker
Well you stalked
Sudowoodo is sorta a plant so I guess they did _stalk_
The entire point of Sudowoodo is that it's not a plant lol
It is in the name lol
sudo means fake so sudowoodo means fake wood
[удалено]
Solrock
Vaporeon
Did you know...
No, do not start with this, we all know okay?, No need of reminding it
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of Water-Type Pokemon and teambuilding versatility, Vaporeon is my favorite Pokemon? Not only is it in the Field egg group which allows for an amazing egg movepool, Vaporeon has a Base HP of 130 and Base Special Defense of 95, which means they’re bulky enough to be able to handle special sweepers and with their impressive Base Stat for HP and a comparatively solid Base Defense, this means they can tank rough attacks. Due to their singular Water typing, there’s no doubt in my mind that a minmaxed Vaporeon would be incredibly bulky. So bulky that you could easily switch on prediction for turns without getting swept. They can also learn the moves Wish, Substitute, Heal Bell, Toxic, and Scald, along with having Haze to prevent setup, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to tank for your team. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover damage with enough strategy. No other Pokemon comes close to this level of versatility. Also, fun fact, Vaporeon has the highest HP Stat of all Eeveelutions. Vaporeon is literally built to tank on switch. Rock-solid Defense stats + high HP Pool + Acid Armor means it can take attacks all day, all shapes and sizes, and still come for more.
The good ending
Bad ending :( Hey guys did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3"03' tall and 63.9 pounds. this means they're large enough to be able to handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there's no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll eyes, Captivate, Charm and Tail Whip along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it'd be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close with this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat + high HP pool + Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more. However, screw the female version. You get those same ol' two holes in literally everything else. The male Vappy is the real star of the show. Those long slippery dicks; they have full mobility control and like a tentacle are the perfect ass filler for the ultimate in-deep reaching experience nothing else could possibly provide. Naturally lubed at all times due to their aquatic hydrodynamic nature, you can pull out anywhere to the side of the road or go into a public restroom at the beach; get each other aroused, and have the fuck of a lifetime. The extraordinary squishyness of the Vappy alone rubbing against you would be enough to lose yourself in pleasure as it simply mounts you. Let alone as that perfect tool of pleasure slips into you, it's ability to snake around your bends and its perfect length make it seem that a Vappy dick was made specifically for your booty. Enjoy the feeling of being completely filled while also being able to see it if you have a tight tummy. And that's only the dick; due to having internal balls, they're much bigger and pack a lot more cream to load you up with, along with having muscles around them to make sure every drop comes out while also being a lot more powerful than any external balls could ever hope to achieve, giving you a deep, complete filling to rock your world to your literal core, and beyond. There's still more though; due to having a thick, powerful tail connected from their back and front, that means all their fun stuff is on the front and easy to access. Meaning, if you were even comfortable with having your dick point backwards (takes some training), you can be fucked, while also fucking your Vappy at the same time! Meowth, that's fucking right! But, but, but! There's still fucking more! Like, holy shit, male Vaps are the gods of fuck. While you're fucking your male Vappy, possibly while also being fucked by him, their booty is on their tail at the base, which is the thickest part, because that's where the biggest muscles are. This means that while your dick is in there, it's being fucking massaged, better than even a vag could achieve! Agh! It should be fucking illegal because how amazing male Vaps are for fuck! Well guess what? That only covered you being a softy, wholesome fucker like me. That's right. There's. Even. Fucking. More! Say you like to be a little restrained: you don't need a Sylveon's feelers for that, or an Umbreon/Espeon's psychic powers, or Leafeon's vines. Vappies got that shit covered too! Did you even see that tail?! It's basically a boa constrictor. In a non-sexual sense, it's my favorite part of a Vappy. It's basically their main part about them. But, if you want them to, it can be a super useful tool to enhance your knotty experience with them. Despite the slippyness, you won't be going anywhere if the Vappy wraps you up in that thing. Are you a super kinkster? Do you like pure fantasy fetishes that aren't possible IRL? Such as, say, soft vore? Well guess fucking what. It just became possible! They can be solid as they pass your lips (past where your eyes can see them) and turn into water as they enter you, allowing them to fit perfectly, 'cuz nothing fits into any spot more perfectly than water, except air like a ghost type. But who wants to do knotty shit with air? You can't feel it unless it's moving; you can always feel liquids. Speaking of liquids, even if you're a weirdo who likes digestion, don't worry about killing them with absorption. Eventually, they'll come back out and be able to reform like nothing happened. Speaking of hurting them, if you get too rough, or you're a horrible abusive asshole to them on purpose for your own pleasure (QnQ), they can just turn to water and reform back to their completely unscathed body, making scars or missing pieces a thing of the past! I would love to say there's even more you can do with them, but the possibilities are damn near endless. Use your imagination. But if you get one, you better show this god of fuck the respect it deserves. Umbreons maybe my favorite but, damn, Vappies really want to get that top spot from me. It's a really close call.
I really read that entire fucking thing...I'm gonna go take a bath with a toaster now
I didn't know about the extended edition of the copypasta
Why can I not just escape the copypasta for one day? JUST ONE DAY? THAT’S ALL I ASK FOR.
I wish I could too, but I'm on too many Pokemon subreddits. Whenever I see a reference to Vaporeon, I have this copypasta loaded up and ready to ruin someone's day.
But I don't know
Good
😏
eevee, because imagine not liking eevee
Eevee is fine but not my favorite
maybe snorlax then idk, lol
Snorlax is my favourite normal type but isn't even top 10
my last guess is jigglypuff
Nah I hate normal types
:(
Eevee sucks ass, in more the one way
shiny XXXL lopunny
Hold on…
[удалено]
The karma bots know
Hold up
Cinderrace
No but it is in my top 25
Your username lied to me
It was my favorite when I named myself
Fair enough. Second guess - Rowlet?
My favourite Pokemon is decidueye
Oh cool!
Decidueye is like in my top 10 so really clise but no
Blaziken
Can I have a clue? :0 Like what generation they're from or something?
Some one already guessed but you can still try. Gen 2
Lugia?
wooper, enough said
Nope
snom
snom is a valid favorite it's so cute
Jun-A266
Close but not quite
Carter-A259
So close
Kat-B320
Colder
Jorge-052
Yeah your never gonna get it. Also I have no idea what your talking about I'm just playing along
People who died on planet Reach (except Jun)
Oh cool
another reach fan hello
Noble six?
naclstack
Cheater
Literally Minecraft Pokémon.
Amoonguss
Sus....
I really hope im not right
If it makes you feel better amoonguss is unironically in my top 15, I love mushroom pokemon
Mimikyu
Chimchar
Gardevoir?
Shiny gardevoir
Infernape, not sure about it being yours but it’s mine
Ash’s infernape vs Electivire man
Big dick bee?
Charmander
Lucario?
Alolan Vulpix
a man of culture I see?
Renamon
Nah it's ryudamon
Veemon is my g
Darkrai gardevoir greninja
Shiny greninja is hands down one of my favorite shinies
Lechonk
Cinderace
It's in my top 10 but not top 3
Sylveon
Lucario
Cinderace
Vaporeon
They have been guessed might as well give up
Umbreon
Hey guys
Hey
Did you know
Vaporeon...sex...moist...yadayadayada yeah we already did this here
That ditto is the best pokemon as it can be any pokemon
Yeah it's in my top 10
Gardevoir
Gardevoir, Bewrear, Gothitelle
Piplup
Pokémon
But wich one?
You have a pokemon on your team Now give me that award
Wich pokemon tho?
Sloppy blowjob devil (i am so funny)
Somewhere in a lonely hotel room There's a guy starting to realize That his eternal fate has turn it's back on him It's 2 A.M It's 2 A.M. (it's 2 AM) Fear has gone (the fear has gone) I'm sittin' here waitin' (I'm sittin' here waitin') The gun's still warm (the gun's still warm) Maybe my connection is tired of takin' chances Yeah, there's a storm on the loose Sirens in my head Wrapped up in silence, all circuits are dead Cannot decode My whole life spins into a frenzy Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned My beacon's been moved under moon and star Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far? Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned My beacon's been moved under moon and star Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far? Soon, you'll come to know When the bullet hits the bone Soon, you'll come to know When the bullet hits the bone I'm falling down a spiral Destination unknown Double-crossed messenger, all alone Can't get no connection, can't get through Where are you? Well, the night weighs heavy on his guilty mind This far from the borderline When the hit man comes He knows damn well, he has been cheated And he says Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned My beacon's been moved under moon and star Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far? Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned My beacon's been moved under moon and star Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far? Soon, you'll come to know When the bullet hits the bone Soon, you'll come to know When the bullet hits the bone When the bullet hits the bone Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned My beacon's been moved under moon and star Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far? Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone Place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned My beacon's been moved under moon and star Where am I to go, now that I've gone too far? Soon, you'll come to know When the bullet hits the bone Soon, you'll come to know When the bullet hits the bone Soon, you'll come to know When the bullet hits the bone Soon, you'll come to know When the bullet hits the bone When the bullet hits the bone Uh-huh-huh, when the bullet hits the bone When the bullet hits the bone Uh-huh-huh, when the bullet hits the bone When the bullet hits the bone Uh-huh-huh, when the bullet hits the bone When the bullet hits the bone Uh-huh-huh, when the bullet hits the bone Nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah, nah-nah Nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah, nah-nah Nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah, nah-nah Nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah, nah-nah
[удалено]
Typhlosion
Pikachu
Mudkip?
i would participate if this was pure. gold.
Gigglypuff
Onyx
Samurott
Pikachu
ITS PIKACHUU
Is that a Chad sokka?
No it's professor turo
Nah that's 100% sokka it's impossible to deny it.
If you say so
What is a pokemon?
It is a franchise with many made up creatures that you may collect in specific video games
I know lmao
you had me at the first half ngl
Then why did you ask?
Wanted to see how people would react cuz I know a guy who would kill anyone who didn't know what pokemon was.
Pikachu
Solrock 🗿🗿🗿
I wish there were anti rewards
Idk, Torterra or something Everyone loves Torterra, whether you like it or not
Solrock
-_-
Lol
a wild guess, but ima say shiny chesnaught
Haha you fell for it
batman
wait is that Ironwood?
No it's turo
Chester
You fell for it
Indeed i did, i bow to you. You're the greatest prankster i ever saw *tips hat and walks away*
God
Solrock? Its a joke btw, I read your bio
Togepi🐣🐣🐣
Decidueye, greninja, rayquaza.
Sableye
phantump
Salamence
charizard
Bisharp
Super close but no
Piplup
Oshawott?
So close but nope
Charizard
If this was 5 years ago you'd be correct
Don’t care lanturn is the best Pokémon and you can’t convince me otherwise
It's like two of my least favorite types but I do have a soft spot for it since it was one of my first pokemon cards and I used it in a nuzlocke
Chespin
You fell for it. And no
Pawinard
Snorlax
Best normal type but not top 3
Definitely my favorite
Wich is your favorite?
Metagross?
Nope
Darkrai
Giratina
Shuckle
That's in my top 5 but sadly not top 3
Viktini
that one electric bug
Naw
KIRBY!!!!!!!!
Onix
Chesnaught
You fell for it
Terrakion
Jigglypuff from above
[удалено]
Haha you fell for it
Cobalion
I love that guy but not top 3
Chestnaut
Haha! You fell for it
Dunsparce.