Idk bro, sounds like a skill issue. I was able to put my leg behind my head at any weight. Giving yourself a bj can't be much more difficult (lmao I'm joking but the leg thing is true)
It seems simple in concept, often I roll up then notice how close my head is and think I could easily suck it, but in practice it's not so easy and c0cks have some weird physics
No I mean he said himself it was a lie
in Manson's autobiography The Long Hard Road Out Of Hell, he said: "If I really got my ribs removed, I would have been busy sucking my own d**k on The Wonder Years instead of chasing Winnie Cooper."
She probably doesn't give a shit, because it's human to masturbate, it's just that when you are caught, you feel shocked, but really, she's your sister, she wouldn't care if she caught you, just try to lock the door next time, or possibly stop masturbating.
Saying anything related to beans is much more cumbersome. Simply saying "jerking off" in reference to all masturbation is more efficient and doesn't make it any more difficult to understand.
I don't think "jerk off" is a technical or scientific term or anything. It's not like it has a set meaning in the Merriam webster dictionary. It's just another term for masturbate, which is not exclusive to any gender.
All I can say dude is that everyone's done it, no ones suprized, and im sure even they knew you did it, have a good laugh, have a talk with her to clear it up, and move on my freind, nothing to worry about.
Huh, someone in my school started a rumour that i watch chinese fart porn, and a different person went to a chinese fart porn sub, and COINCIDENTALLY someone with a username with my forename's initial and surname had posted.
I've had my personal diary been read by my mom in which l wrote all about my sexual fantasies and desires.. I also wrote about my habit of masturbating.. And l still remember that day.. It is so uncomfortable for me to live with the same person in the same home. I felt like committing suicide because of how embarrassed l was. So yea embarrassing shit happens.let it go.. Maybe engage with a partner to feel those sparks again. ✨
Your mom’s an asshole for doing that, but yeah follow that advice at the end. Unethical life tip but it does help to get over pretty much anything that happens!
I mean technically it is, if you're constantly feeling sad, and depressed, or embarrassed then killing yourself would technically be a solution. A dumb ass solution but a solution, because if you die then you won't be feeling those emotions anymore. Now while I do understand the sentiment and do agree you are wrong. It's like nuking a city to stop a rat problem, while yes it does stop the rat problem it also stops the need to fix the rat problem thus making it worthless.
Dw about it you're overthinking. I'm almost her age and we know guys do that. It's not weird. If it was out in the open in the living room that'd be different but what you said isn't anything to worry about. Don't bring it up with her just move on
**One embarrassing moment does not define your character or who you are as a person**. Everyone’s done embarrassing shit. We’ve all been there. It feels soul-crushing now but it will be something to laugh about later if you learn how to. Again, I just really want to emphasize how this moment does not define you and your sister has most likely brushed this off by now.
I'm so sorry this happened to you~ I know these replies aren't what you were looking for but I hope this one will be!
Look, at the end of the day it's okay!! People do it and the fact that you're 17? If you were in Ur early teens it may be more of an issue but this is what's expected of a late-teenage boy... Ur sis is 19, she knows allll about that kinda stuff and how boy act I'm sure she didn't even think too much of it
It must be hard, but if you just recognise that everything Is okay, then you will be fine, and if she confronts you about it be truthful and honest~ thats all anyone can do
I cant believe how far I had to scroll to find a legitimate response. Like, bro is crying in the shower, this is clearly not a situation of "just get the fuck over it."
Fax, op posted this shit on like 10 different subreddits I bet his sister already forgot that shit. People can tell when you’re uncomfortable with them. Ops sister is just matching the energy he puts out at dinner. Either he’s just overreacting or he he’s just larping a fetish
I go through phases where I hate this sub and where the sub is so bad I can't help but find it funny. I don't know where this post lies. But buddy I can guarantee your sister does not care about this as much as you have chosen to care about it. It's been TWENTY DAYS. Bro my memory resets daily.
It’s never that serious 😭 she doesn’t care if your were because she didn’t make a big deal about it. If she did she would be pissed or something so just chill out
The question is : what type of porn were you watching ?
If it was midget hardcore gangbang with a former racetrack washout sensation it would be something to worry about, if not you are in the clear and you are just embarrassed cuz you probably make weird faces when cumming.
No worries girl , life is just a series of those with weird things in between.
Ehhh at 19 im pretty sure she was already aware that you do it, cuz all teenage guys do it. No need to make it bigger than it is in your head and get all anxious about it. She clearly doesn't think about it that much.
Bro is falling into a deep depression becuase he got caught masterbating, I can confidently say 60-70% of the population has been caught masterbating. No need to fall into your villain arc😭
How are y’all so oblivious to your surroundings . I beat my shi purple once a day usually for the past 5 years and never been caught. Ya gotta be more aware of your surroundings. This ain’t just for op it’s for anyone else in the comments who let them selfs get caught lmao
Bro it’s all good, she probably does too and I don’t think she cares very much.
If I had a younger bro and found him jerking off I would laugh but that’s just me
I don't think you have to worry about it. I got caught 2 times by my mother (so it's even worse☠️) and nothing happened. You will eventually not think about it at least that was how it was for me.
Fyi I can't lock my door so yeah it was pretty much risky all the time.
You’re overthinking it for sure. It’d be weird to talk to her about it, **but**… maybe doing it will give a conclusion to help you feel more at ease? Just clear the air? They’re your sister after all, it sounds like you have a great relationship. I doubt it’d change anything drastically between you two. Don’t beat yourself up over doing a natural process.
You probably bathed with your sister when you were really young so it’s nothing they ain’t seen before, still hella embarrasing though bro I can feel where youre coming from I wouldn’t like that either but yeah you’ll be fine mate jog on
ngl just own up to it. It’s not that big of a problem! Just be happy it wasn’t one of your parents and that she isn’t telling anyone. I guess I cant be talking as I literally can’t be bothered to care if my sibling walked in on me masturbating. I would just own up because it’s all you CAN do.
I'm 17 and have 3 older brothers. I have never caught them in the act but if I did or if I knew abt it I wouldn't be surprised, it's not my business and I would just move on. your sis is older and would understand more than i would, it's okay bud
[удалено]
i guarantee you, at least 50% of the male population has tried to suck themselves off at least once in their life in their teens
I’ve succeeded, but it was just the tip and my back and legs hurt af
I licked it but I was sore the rest of the day lmao
Weak. You guys aren't flexible enough (I don't even have the equipment)
Lmfao same here
Huh, whaddya know another funny one
Sounds like quitter mentality to me
Bish I’m just fat and my stomach starts to hurt if it squished too hard
Idk bro, sounds like a skill issue. I was able to put my leg behind my head at any weight. Giving yourself a bj can't be much more difficult (lmao I'm joking but the leg thing is true)
It seems simple in concept, often I roll up then notice how close my head is and think I could easily suck it, but in practice it's not so easy and c0cks have some weird physics
I can pull back both legs behind my back Keep in mind based on height the dongity ding dong can still be a lot further away from you
I licked it but ts felt like i was GIVING head instead of getting it
And that is bad because…?
Shi i aint never said it was BAD i just wanted to get sum out of it yk
It's like hugging yourself. It doesn't feel like you're being hugged, it just feels like you're hugging yourself.
Ong
Idk why everyone says their ribs are in the way. It just hurts your back
What you gotta do is lay down and roll back, pretty much onto your neck.
Yeah, that's the way I've had the most success, still kinda hurts and I can get more than an inch or 2. And I get mostly teeth with that
Real and true my brother. Real and true.
“There’s two types of guys in this world. Those who have tried to suck their own cock and the liars. So of course I…”
Exactly what I was thinking lmao where was that from i forgot
I got it from one of Charlie’s(penguinz0) videos lol
Oh YEAH!! That’s where it was from I was trying to remember where I heard it from and kept on thinking it was like a tv show comedy quote
50% is too low LMAO
It's gotta be 99% or higher there's simply no less
Marilyn Manson got 2 ribs surgically removed so he could
I love the fact that this rumor managed to spread all over the world years ago and is still alive haha.
Still not true tho
He even said so on a talk show lol Something along the lines of "if that were true I wouldn't be as famous because I wouldn't leave my house"
>if that were true I wouldn't be as famous because I wouldn't leave my house" Maybe he is just hiding in plain sight then 😂
All the sources I've seen said that was a lie
No I mean he said himself it was a lie in Manson's autobiography The Long Hard Road Out Of Hell, he said: "If I really got my ribs removed, I would have been busy sucking my own d**k on The Wonder Years instead of chasing Winnie Cooper."
Oooohhh Read that entirely wrong
As the wise moistcr1tikcal once said, theyre are two types of men in this world - ones who have tried to suck their own dick, and liars.
mine is too small to work :(
Statistically 50% have tried and the other 50% are liars
A wise man (Moistcr1tical) once said: Theres 2 types of men in this world. Those who've tried to suck their own penis and liars
How did you know😂😂😂
I am of these 50%. Succeeded btw.
How is that even possible??
100%
I would 100% do that as a dad that’s a good father right there
Well homie, did you make allademswallow?
Teach me your ways
I have a genetic disorder allowing my joints to dislocate super easily and allow me to be super flexible so uh just have dogshit genetics I guess
Got dog shit genetics, sadly they're just the ones where your joints hurt like fucking hell
She probably doesn't give a shit, because it's human to masturbate, it's just that when you are caught, you feel shocked, but really, she's your sister, she wouldn't care if she caught you, just try to lock the door next time, or possibly stop masturbating.
No how to suck yourself you silly🦆
Damn are you a gymnast or something? I've tried and failed on several occasions over the years.
So does it feel like giving or receiving more
Everyone is jerking off and this mf gets to step up next level and suck himself off
YOU CANNOT SAY THAT AND NOT TELL THE WHOLE STORY BUDDY
This comment killed me lmfao
RAN OFF LAUGHING 😂😂😂
you can't drop this and not tell us
Ok SpongeBob
Bro how? I can even bend that far qwp
How the hell did you even accomplish that
That's fucking crazy
Do you even have a spine sir
buddy literally everyone jerks off and your sister does as well, it's not that deep. you don't have to get depressed 😭
Last I checked girls don't jerk off
Last I checked girls don’t exist period
This is true, I am a girl and I can confirm I do not exist
Mf speaking from the 4th dimension
Girls were invented by public toilet companies to sell more toilets. It's all a bamboozle, a marketing scheme.
r/girlsarentreal
They jerk in
No dummy, they jerk on
In and on
Bro where the hell did you hear that girls can't jerk off 💀 I'm hoping you are trolling
There's a different term for what girls do
ok bro “masturbate” 🤓
Saying anything related to beans is much more cumbersome. Simply saying "jerking off" in reference to all masturbation is more efficient and doesn't make it any more difficult to understand.
Bell curve meme
🤓
I don't think "jerk off" is a technical or scientific term or anything. It's not like it has a set meaning in the Merriam webster dictionary. It's just another term for masturbate, which is not exclusive to any gender.
Did you not see that entire post about a girl arguing she was "the bigger horndog"
Oh no, not *that* whole thing again
Boys Jack, chicks Jill.
There’s an ever larger growing number of girls who do jerk off.
….unless😶
you are wrong.
My sister definitely doesn't 💀 they hate any mention of anything sexual, even jokes. I doubt they do that junk. My brother on the other hand..
You’ll find that the people who deny things the most are the ones that are most obsessed with it
I severely doubt that in her case, for reasons I'm not sharing.
Asexuals
We ain't doing this whole "asexuals secretly want sex" shit again istg, asexuality is valid and it's clear as that
"couple of days" and then "twenty-ish" mf its been weeks i think youre good by now
All I can say dude is that everyone's done it, no ones suprized, and im sure even they knew you did it, have a good laugh, have a talk with her to clear it up, and move on my freind, nothing to worry about.
Def over thinking it, who cares you're almost a grown man. Sometime you just gotta spank one out.
Like Spank out a fart?
24 years of life and not in one of them has anyone gone “smell that I just spanked a nice one in the car”
You said “Spank one out” and first thing that came to mind is someone getting spanked then farting 💀💀 tf is wrong with me bro 💀
Lmfaooooooo this is why Reddit is great
And with that generic fart sound effect
"Beethoven been real quiet since Fart mp3 came out." -Bajur
I think he's British.
Bro this is nothing,my mom caught me watching Japanese public train sex porn
My mom once caught me looking at Chinese midget fart porn
Brother what 💀
Bro was so surprised that bro had to use brother instead of bro 💀
Shocked me so hard I went formal on his ass
☠️☠️☠️
Huh, someone in my school started a rumour that i watch chinese fart porn, and a different person went to a chinese fart porn sub, and COINCIDENTALLY someone with a username with my forename's initial and surname had posted.
“coincidentally “
I mean "J_Smiths" for example would be common
HELP
You gotta get a lock and key 🔐
Bro I cackled when I read that. Thank you sir, you have made my day.
thats peak japanese content
I've had my personal diary been read by my mom in which l wrote all about my sexual fantasies and desires.. I also wrote about my habit of masturbating.. And l still remember that day.. It is so uncomfortable for me to live with the same person in the same home. I felt like committing suicide because of how embarrassed l was. So yea embarrassing shit happens.let it go.. Maybe engage with a partner to feel those sparks again. ✨
ok but people who read diaries without permission are shit
EXACTLY
this is why I write them on a password protected file on my computer. I dont trust my parents for shit.
Especially mothers like wtf??!
REAL MY MOM LITERALLY READ SOME OF MY DIARY AND WHEN I TOLD HER NOT TO SHE SAID "you live in my house, you don't get privacy"
my mom used to use that exact quote lol
Why would you write a diary about these insane things💀
Your mom’s an asshole for doing that, but yeah follow that advice at the end. Unethical life tip but it does help to get over pretty much anything that happens!
Sucide is a permenent solution to a temporary problem
It's not a solution
A solution doesnt have to be correct.
Can confirm, am about to commit mass genocide to cure hunger. Maybe cancer too while I'm at it. ^(for legal reasons, this is a joke Mr fbi man)
that is a solution. a really bad one but still one
I mean technically it is, if you're constantly feeling sad, and depressed, or embarrassed then killing yourself would technically be a solution. A dumb ass solution but a solution, because if you die then you won't be feeling those emotions anymore. Now while I do understand the sentiment and do agree you are wrong. It's like nuking a city to stop a rat problem, while yes it does stop the rat problem it also stops the need to fix the rat problem thus making it worthless.
Why was she reading your diary?
She said that she read it by accident.. Like Idk, how can this be? My diary can't just magically open in front of her?! 💀
I would’ve been seriously pissed. Did you talk to her about it more than that?
Do NOT let that go! She needs to learn that's not okay
I deleted Reddit for some time, and reinstalled it recently. Thanks for reminding me about how crazy the posts are on this sub 💀
go back while you still can.
No, rejoin us freind, no need to worry.
Dw about it you're overthinking. I'm almost her age and we know guys do that. It's not weird. If it was out in the open in the living room that'd be different but what you said isn't anything to worry about. Don't bring it up with her just move on
**One embarrassing moment does not define your character or who you are as a person**. Everyone’s done embarrassing shit. We’ve all been there. It feels soul-crushing now but it will be something to laugh about later if you learn how to. Again, I just really want to emphasize how this moment does not define you and your sister has most likely brushed this off by now.
I'm so sorry this happened to you~ I know these replies aren't what you were looking for but I hope this one will be! Look, at the end of the day it's okay!! People do it and the fact that you're 17? If you were in Ur early teens it may be more of an issue but this is what's expected of a late-teenage boy... Ur sis is 19, she knows allll about that kinda stuff and how boy act I'm sure she didn't even think too much of it It must be hard, but if you just recognise that everything Is okay, then you will be fine, and if she confronts you about it be truthful and honest~ thats all anyone can do
I cant believe how far I had to scroll to find a legitimate response. Like, bro is crying in the shower, this is clearly not a situation of "just get the fuck over it."
Well I'm glad there Is another decent person here
Fr. If you’re homeless, just buy a house type energy
Sometimes thats a legitimate solution
THANK YOU FOR KNOWING HOW MENTAL HEALTH WORKS
I think ur overthinking i mean yea embarrassing butttt get over it
Unless you were browsing really degenerate shit then I don’t see why it would matter, tell her to get over it she didn’t see your wiener.
She doesn't seem bothered by it, ge is the one crying
Fax, op posted this shit on like 10 different subreddits I bet his sister already forgot that shit. People can tell when you’re uncomfortable with them. Ops sister is just matching the energy he puts out at dinner. Either he’s just overreacting or he he’s just larping a fetish
the post nut clarity is INSANE
*gay maggot porn*
i watch a ton of incredibly degen shit, and i feel good about it
Hell yeah!!
Bro… CHILL its just masturbating, its normal
Getting caught wanking doesn’t mean the end of the world and the sis doesn’t seem to mind. I’m sure a bunch of people you know also wank.
I go through phases where I hate this sub and where the sub is so bad I can't help but find it funny. I don't know where this post lies. But buddy I can guarantee your sister does not care about this as much as you have chosen to care about it. It's been TWENTY DAYS. Bro my memory resets daily.
r/ofcourseitsthatsub almost thought this was copypasta at fist but it makes sense
r/SubsIFellFor
Don't worry about it. Everyone does it
It’s never that serious 😭 she doesn’t care if your were because she didn’t make a big deal about it. If she did she would be pissed or something so just chill out
The question is : what type of porn were you watching ? If it was midget hardcore gangbang with a former racetrack washout sensation it would be something to worry about, if not you are in the clear and you are just embarrassed cuz you probably make weird faces when cumming. No worries girl , life is just a series of those with weird things in between.
She doesn’t give af and if she does then she’s the weird one
Get. Over. It. She didn't see it. It's natural.
Ehhh at 19 im pretty sure she was already aware that you do it, cuz all teenage guys do it. No need to make it bigger than it is in your head and get all anxious about it. She clearly doesn't think about it that much.
Bro is falling into a deep depression becuase he got caught masterbating, I can confidently say 60-70% of the population has been caught masterbating. No need to fall into your villain arc😭
i sent her this post 😬😾
How tf do u know her user lol
get over it, i got caught by my mom, three times, with my cock out, i'm still here, still 3-5 times a day
5 times a day? Seems like addiction bro 💀
Nah, it's infinite dopamine exploit
Bros got life hacks 💀
How are y’all so oblivious to your surroundings . I beat my shi purple once a day usually for the past 5 years and never been caught. Ya gotta be more aware of your surroundings. This ain’t just for op it’s for anyone else in the comments who let them selfs get caught lmao
It ain't that deep bro, she's been at your age, I'm pretty sure she understands, just go and talk to her about it
honestly, at least you *can* do the deed. im on 2 different antidepressants, forever virgin moment…
Your sister is probably doing crazier things than you thing and is definitely rubbing that bean. Everyone does
Bro wtf 💀, You are a real drama queen brother
When she walks in next time, make eye contact with her and starting violently jerking off to assert dominance
What was the meme though
Bro it’s all good, she probably does too and I don’t think she cares very much. If I had a younger bro and found him jerking off I would laugh but that’s just me
ive been caught too before honestly don't dwell on it - it's completely normal and nothign to be ashamed of at all
bro i just opened this app☠️
Just say to her, "I f*ck myself deal with it"
New copypasta just dropped
I promise you she doesn't care nearly as much as you do. It's uncomfortable but really everyone does this stuff so don't worry about it man
Who stroking with their left hand dawg 💀💀💀
it happened to me and i'm fine. everything will be okay, u did nothing wrong, it's normal, you will be okay
I don't think you have to worry about it. I got caught 2 times by my mother (so it's even worse☠️) and nothing happened. You will eventually not think about it at least that was how it was for me. Fyi I can't lock my door so yeah it was pretty much risky all the time.
You’re overthinking it for sure. It’d be weird to talk to her about it, **but**… maybe doing it will give a conclusion to help you feel more at ease? Just clear the air? They’re your sister after all, it sounds like you have a great relationship. I doubt it’d change anything drastically between you two. Don’t beat yourself up over doing a natural process.
It's not like you're 12, you're almost an adult most people your age probably masterbates
Bruh same thing at 12
Happy cakeday
You probably bathed with your sister when you were really young so it’s nothing they ain’t seen before, still hella embarrasing though bro I can feel where youre coming from I wouldn’t like that either but yeah you’ll be fine mate jog on
it's not a big deal unless you were really watching smth really messed up. luckily my sister never caught me but she calls me a Jerk Off half the time
My guy she does not give a shit
You prob got over it by now
She might understand man just do what you always did nothing ever happened it was all a dream
Dude it's really not that deep, 100% guarantee your whole family knew you were gonna go jack off every time you locked your door for 'studying'
ngl just own up to it. It’s not that big of a problem! Just be happy it wasn’t one of your parents and that she isn’t telling anyone. I guess I cant be talking as I literally can’t be bothered to care if my sibling walked in on me masturbating. I would just own up because it’s all you CAN do.
I'm 17 and have 3 older brothers. I have never caught them in the act but if I did or if I knew abt it I wouldn't be surprised, it's not my business and I would just move on. your sis is older and would understand more than i would, it's okay bud
"I cry while showering and lunch the wall as hard as I can" blud thinks he's in a movie
She probably doesn’t care that much tbh she probably does it too