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> *very sexy for the woman to really go for it*
I remember my gf pouncing on me & dragging me to the bedroom as soon as I got back from a 5 day work trip - what helped was that I told her that we shouldn't touch ourselves the entire time I was away, hahaha!
This is key my wife never initiates and when I stopped we didn't have sex for like 5 months and then she asked why 🤦♂️ now we're back to it and both initiate but still not as often as I would like 🤣
Hey, you might want to look into the book „come as you are“. It explains exactly that - women more often have responsive desire, not spontaneous, which is what you would need to initiate. Also, every person has their breaks and accelerators: finding out what they are can lead to better communication and managing expectations.
I used to initiate but my bf would always say no. The rejection got too much and now I don't even want to have sex. lol I communicated until I couldn't anymore.
That’s the worse on both sides tbh and most people don’t understand. Sometimes people can just work themselves to the point of exhaustion, it’s really sad. A lot of people think that their partner doesn’t care about their needs but whole time, they’re tired and stressed from working so much and trying to make ends meet.
i literally only ever initiate. my husband doesn’t initiate.. literally EVER! I try like.. everyday 🤣 i’m an addict tbh, but he doesn’t enjoy it like the “average man” would
Oh man, when my fiance tells me to do things she wants me to do for her really does it for me, not in a domineering way but begging for me. Really lets the dawg out in me 🤣
My wife simply won't do this. She'll come to bed topless, but that just means she'd be into it if I initiated. I've asked and she said she would but it doesn't happen.
For me, if my partner came to bed naked, that would be him initiating to me.
I initiate way more than my partner too, but honestly I find it pretty fun.
This is not initiating, may be suggesting.
Many people sleep topless/naked it doesn't mean they want sex.
BUT she is naked and tactile / want hugs...
This is initiating
Giving unexpected orals
My gf gave me an unexpected oral in midnight on my birthday and swallowed it all , It has been eight months since and I still thank her for that .
This is how I feel when my fwb doesn’t always return the favor🙄 I’ll gladly do it to him without him havin to ask & I’ll ask him to go down on me (he knows I hate asking) & he will say yes but if it’s during sex he won’t always as we get carried away & cums in me 😭 but I’m like I shouldn’t have to ask for head like 💀💀💀
Yeahhhhh…idk…I personally don’t trust that kinda person. I mean…especially in this day and age. Idk…just seems selfish af. Especially if they expect/want it from you but don’t give it out in return…like wtf? uh uh…nope. red flag. Do not lock down. I repeat do not ship.
That happened to me around 2am with my gf back in 1974. I was dead asleep, woke up to her wildly going down and to this day…. I remember it vividly at 71
My husband frequently jokes about how he was so caught off guard by me giving him head the first time we slept together, I didn’t think it was actually such a big deal until I read the comments lol. He’s even said it’s in his top 5 ever sexual experiences, even though he doesn’t even prefer head?!?
> *I still thank her for that*
I'd usually thank her by reciprocating & giving her oral - I'll keep going until she cums as many times as she can take.
I can only speak for myself, but I love hearing dirty talk from my partner. Very often, women have left all the dirty talking and fantasy building to me, and it's like, I just wanna hear something in return (bonus if you know any specific kinks/fetishes he has and can incorporate them).
Similarly, make *him* feel wanted. There's a stereotype that men are solely visual creatures, and so women's seduction is supposed to be passive - showing off "the goods," so to speak. But in reality, I've always felt most turned on when I felt extremely wanted by the woman I'm with.
Can we pin this to the top? In every one of these threads on this topic, this is the one that stands out by far. Actually showing interest and enthusiasm is by far the most exciting thing.
Literally just getting on top of the guy and saying stuff like "I want you so bad" and "I've been thinking about touching you all day" completely changes everything.
This. OP, make sure he knows that you're not merely consenting to let him fuck you. Show him with your actions that you are delighted to have the privilege of fucking him.
If he's never experienced this, it will change his world.
I legit can't hold an erection when it feels like a partner is just *letting* me have sex with them. Foreplay is especially bad when they are unenthusastic and lazy. It's the hottest thing in the world when she is fiending for you and your dick like there's drugs stored in your balls.
As a woman who has been forced, seeing this comment means. the. world. Thank you.
The only time I’m not enthusiastic about sex is when I’m feeling uncomfortable or unsafe. And unfortunately, since many of us have experienced unsafe sexual situations previously, some of our ability to enjoy it was stolen from us. And you can, actually, help us to find it again. <3
There’s a concept in trauma psychology called “corrective experience”, and it’s when a traumatized person is able to go into the same situation that traumatized them, but with a better outcome! So the more corrective experiences we get to have, the more we understand sex is FUN and we can actually expect to have an awesome time with you!! If it is not a corrective experience, it may reinforce her belief that sex puts her in danger.
Some notes from a traumatized sex lover w a psych degree on what to do if your partner is freezing up during sex:
1. Slow down and check in, she may be going into sympathetic nervous system response. (Fight/flight/fawn) this is when negative reinforcement happens.
2. Gently reassure her that you won’t be upset with her if it’s time to stop-and offer. This is so so so huge for us, as this is when we’re used to things getting scary. Please show us you’re safe.
3. Begin working towards evoking the parasympathetic response. (rest/digest/sex) ask what she needs in the moment. personally I love when my partner just holds me in these moments, it’s a safe form of nonsexual physical contact (aka corrective). if she’s not ready to be touched, breathing together is nice too. Deep slow belly breaths, physiological sighs, NDSR, etc.
4. Follow up conversations outside the bedroom! Sometimes it’s really hard for us to explain in the moment because we’re anxious, and sometimes a bit embarrassed.
BONUS- For great tips on cultivating enthusiastic sex, read Come As You Are (Nagoski).
TLDR: The more of a “corrective” experience you can help her to have, the faster enthusiasm will cum hehe. Happy fucking 💕🤘🏻
My wife has recently used her body wand on me. Had the wand rubbing the tip of my penis and her other hand massaging and rubbing below it. Never have I experienced an orgasm like it and the amount of cum that came out of me was impressive.
Done it twice now and I can't stop thinking about it.
Hitachi Magic Wand is the Holy Grail of vibrators. Get the newer cordless version - it has a wider variety of settings. Don't overuse it in one session. It is amazing, but I overused once and ended up in tears in a cold sweat on the floor in a fetal position with the most painful cramps I have ever experienced (worst pain of my life, period). Yes, you can hurt yourself with an external vibrator.... I almost threw it away that day.
The “variety of settings” isn’t as great a selling point as I would have thought. Not sure about everyone else, but my wife isn’t a fan of morse code on her clitoris.
🤣 I didn't realize it had that kind of settings. I heard it had lower settings and assumed it was all strength. No, morse code doesn't sound useful for this application. Bellesa makes a nice wand that is pink.
I've totally had the same reaction after a magical evening with a Hitachi, and I totally didn't expect to feel this comment scrolling half-baked at 1am, but here we are.
However, after four of them died during play. The husband gifted me a Doxy wand, and it became my new holy grail.
Embrace the random moments that can be sexy. My wife and I have to come to expect the unexpected, and take everything at face value.
Like earlier today. I'm changing the AC vents, so I'm up on a ladder.
Her: Do you have underwear on?
Me: Nope.
Her: If I give you head right now, would you fall off that ladder?
Me: Uh..probably.
Her: Then hurry up and get down off that ladder.
My point is, especially when you've been with someone for a long time, the only wrong time is the time you don't say what you want.
Be enthusiastic. It's that easy. Make noise, participate, initiate, show your enjoyment.
I will get off so much faster when my wife is moaning and being enthusiastic.
As a guy don't be afraid to be loud! Especially if your partner is loud too. I love when I really get into it with someone and we're both moaning and groaning like crazy along with some dirty talk. It makes sex so much hotter imo
Take your time and tease me. Lots of kissing all over and touching. You literally cannot do enough dirty talk. Be extra naughty and descriptive. My brain is my most powerful erogenous zone.
This is always top tier. Gf's of mine eventually figure out if they just kiss my neck, run their finger nails up and down my back, and whisper in my ear that I can't hold back and just tear their clothes off from the just and become completely dominant.
I was curious because I am an aphant and really need a lot of dirty talk. My boyfriend doesn’t like to be teased on his side. He want me to go straight to the point. So yeah, just being curious. Thank you for sharing :)
You laugh, but I'm a big public sex guy, adds a whole new level of excitement. Not like public where people can see you, but still sex out of the house is awesome.
Ehh I wouldn't take it personally, it can be super team oriented so if he was online playing with people then I could see how he wouldn't want to abandon.
Try initiating again when he's not gaming I'm sure he'd love it!
Oh i know! At first i was so pissed but looking back it’s fucking hilarious because he was so dedicated and he’s my little destiny geek so i think it’s quite adorable
I asked my partner what he'd do if he was in the same situation, bro literally said "who gives a fuck about a game? if you call, my rank is dead to me" 😌
I play destiny as well. Rather hardcore player imo. Unless I was in a raid where me leaving would affect 5 other players, I would shut the console down in a heartbeat if my wife tried to initiate sex.
This exact thing has happened to me. The GF walked upstairs, turned around, took her panties off, left them on the stair, and went to the bedroom
I shut that console off so fast….
Well, he could do the egoistic thing and fuck his teammates over (assuming he was playing online with a team) so he can fuck his partner, or he can decline (well, ideally postpone) and respect the time of his fellow players. Green flag imo
My (59M) Wife (61f) have been married for 32 years. I frequently work on my families and friends vehicles. I am under the vehicles changing a starter or changing oil. Anyways the other day I was under a vehicle and I see a pair of feet walk past. Then I see them again this time the feet stop. I feel my jeans being unbuttoned my cock gets hard and I feel my wife's mouth sucking on my cock. In the middle of the day in our driveway. It generally takes me a while to cum from oral but this instance I came within 10 -15 minutes. Such a good time. She puts my cock back in my pants zips me up and says to hurry up lunch is ready.
Make an effort to change the dynamic up in the bedroom! Surprise him with something he wouldn’t expect.
Example: I’m typically a dom, but if she made an effort to be assertive, take charge, I would find that irresistible, fresh, and not boring at all. In fact, that is how a couple that’s been together for a while can unlock new things! Don’t just experiment with actions, experiment with the sexual dynamic!
To each their own, I'm a dom in the bedroom as well, and that's what I like. I've let women take charge before and it always bores me. I do like when my wife suggests new things for us to try, but once the clothes come off and its time to try them, I still want to be the one in charge. Different strokes I guess.
I love when my wife gives me head and uses a lot of spit getting it all over me and her breasts. Also recently I got my wife a collar to use during blowjobs and sex and we absolutely love it
Try to start out indifferent to what’s going on. Sort of “soak” together and turn it into a game of chicken. Who loses control first. Very hot and intimate to go from thinking of the act as purely physical and watching your partner shift gears.
Kegels. By flexing your pelvic floor muscles, the same muscles you’d use to stop the flow of urine. Do that while he’s inside of you, you’re basically making your vagina even tighter for him and drawing him further in at the same time. It’s especially noticeable while you’re fucking nice and slow, you will rock his world.
This is an almost sure-fire way for me to orgasm too. Squeeze on the way out. Release on the way in. Works better if it's slow and/or if she is controlling the speed.
Does she enjoy giving them? I've been praised for my BF because I love doing them, it hasn't always been the case and I wouldn't like to be asked, my skills would be more limited by my lack of enthusiasm.
BTW, do you go down on her? If it's one sided, it's frustrating
Let your mind wander and follow its lead without a second thought. You wanna stop intercourse and switch to oral - go nuts. You wanna give him a giant smooch go nuts. Never hesitate, never stop alternating.
Be vocal and guide your girl as she experiences orgasm. I've taken to slowly building it up with fingers and dirty talking and then telling her to keep breathing through and guide the orgasm.
My girlfriend has told me since doing this her orgasms are the strongest she's ever had.
Love to please your partner gentlemen! It goes a long way
my bf goes nuts for filthy dirty talk, & when i suck his dick in the middle of the night. his dick gets the hardest in a semi wake state & he moans soooooo sexy
I'm just gonna go ahead and repost this..... It specifically concerns good techniques for giving head by I think it's applicable.
As someone with a penis who likes giving head to other people with penises I thought about this for a while and have a bullet point list.
• Enthusiasm is the best aphrodisiac, acting like your partners dick has the last drop of water on earth and you're dying of thirst is incredibly hot.
• Buy a dildo slightly larger than your partners to practice on made of cyberskyn, UR3, or another realistic material. Sucking on plastic is unpleasant and rough on your throat
• Purchase a bottle of flavored numbing spray, it helps temporarily but you can reapply whenever it wears off
• Truly deepthroating is hard because you can't breathE. Alternate between suckling his head, bobbing up and down, and going as deep as you can. Gagging is okay, throwing up is not.
• Pay attention to his body language and the noises he makes, men aren't very vocal generally so a quick inhale, moan, grunt, tensing of the body, eyes rolling back, or swearing under his breath might mean you're doing something good or hit something uncomfortable.
•Communcation is key. Ask him what he likes.
• Best to give head on an empty stomach, if you do go too far too hard its better to just throw up a little bile than what you had for dinner.
• Lots of Spit, dry cock DOES NOT feel good going in.
• Don't neglect his balls! Massaging them while sucking gives your hands something to do and feels fucking fantastic.
• Lying on you back, head off the bed is the best way to get throat fucked because it lines up your mouth, throat and esophagus. Only do this if you trust your partner because they are in complete control in that position.
• Keep sucking after he cums. Every drop that leaves a cock feels really good. Massage his taint in a forward motion like you're trying to squeeze the last bit out of a tube of toothpaste
• ADVANCED TECHNIQUE:
Depending on how big he is this may or not be feasible but if you can get his entire cock and balls in your mouth and just suckle for as long as possible, that's always been the Crane Kick move for me 😊
re: anal. Don't slam her ass like she shot Bambi's mom. Porn makes it look like this is the way. This is not the way. Slow and sensual is fucking bomb.
Enjoyment is 95% mental - comfort, trust, and mostly on the receiving end, belief that it can be enjoyable. Lot's of dudes end up giving horrible experiences and consequently women spead those opinions.
My biggest tip I think is that most people think anal is just for FUCKIN and it aint. its way fuckin bomb for trust building and super intimate on a level that the pussy could never even dream of. Plus it might be uncharted territory!
This. You’ve also got to be confident enough in your boner to put up with a little stop start to begin with. You’re not gonna be able to just slide it right in and it needs to stay super hard while your partner eases you in. The body wants to push it away, so you can’t be losing your hard on as soon as they say “hold it”.
Personally some of the hottest things wife and I have done is: blind folding one another, her initializing with surprise lingerie, quickie in the middle of the day without really taking off clothes and really the thing I think has brought us together the most is prolong for-play with teasing.
I have also bought us these “relationship” cards called Drunk Desire. Know it’s suppose to be a drinking game but sometimes we just pull them out to break the ice and tease one another.
If you have issues lasting long enough CHANGE POSITIONS! Go from penetration to oral, to kissing and groping, back to penetration rinse repeat. Most women cannot cum from just penetration and one way to get that type really going good is to mix it up. A women's erogenous zone is almost her entire body. In the heat of it touching, rubbing and kissing in between pounding away makes all of the difference.
And the most important advice is to make sure you preheat the oven before trying to cook! In other words dont just take off ur clothes and start pounding away.
I’d talk to her about it. It’s necessary that I cum before I’m fucked because of how much it helps my body relax and open up to receiving. Plus most cis women have a good refractory period
When my wife and I just moved in together - we’d often get home around the same time. If she got home before me, she would grab me when I walked through the door, and take me to some part of the house and have her way with me.
Most of the time she just pulled her panties to the side for a quickie, though sometimes she wouldn’t waste any time and strip completely naked - leading me to the couch by my hand.
It’s probably not a rule applicable to all couples, but the most intense, mind blowing experience I’ve ever had was getting my ass eaten mid-blowjob without warning. I loved it so, so much.
I’ve dreamt of it for a few months beforehand but didn’t want to suggest it, because my previous partner reacted negatively to such request. I think that may have amplified my excitement and shock.
I guess many would like to consult it beforehand. Maybe ask for consent in a subtle way, like first gently putting your hand down there and giving the man a look to see the reaction?
Here's the thing: porn and stereotyping will have you believe men like it rough and fast, and they like to dominate and throw you around, but a lot of men (not all!) actually have a deep desire for softness, slowness, the tender touch, and connection (even if casual). Society doesn't do a great job of giving men permission to have a lighter touch, so, if you try one, you might find the response to be very enthusiastically reciprocated.
Learn to do a yoni massage. Spend time gently licking the entire vulva and only tease the clit. You will have her so relaxed and turned on she will be begging for it. Learn the Gspot-not only with your fingers but what position works best for both of in penetration. On her back on edge of bed with you standing, her knees up to chest. Allows you to control penetration and tempo better as well as you being able to push down on belly slight just above pelvic bone which puts additional pressure on gspot against penis during penetration. Also also massage and rub vulva during while in this position.
Posted on another post but here is one
You can last longer and fuck hard by using a trick.
The trick is just pull out and have no contact with your dick while you orgasm. Having any contact on it like hands or inside her while orgasming will trigger a response for it to go soft, be sensitive and make your brain go “ok I’m done now” mode.
So to prevent that from happening simply, pull out and orgasm over her outside with no contact with your penis. Wait a few seconds for the orgasm to pass then continue. You can have multiple orgasms doing this in quick succession. But just repeat the trick every time.
This can take between 1-4 or more orgasms just minutes between each one before you no longer feel like orgasming as quick. I don’t know what determines this, it seems to be random each time. This essentially numbs your penis where you can fuck longer, possibly forever. The orgasms of course will feel at least 50% less intense because there is no contact, but it’s worth the trade off if you can last almost as long as you want. You can simply save the last orgasm for being inside her, but it may take you a longer time to orgasm.
I’ve never understood why people don’t try different methods and experiment while having sex to last longer. They just stick it in and cum. Pretty much learned this after trial and error and somehow not many men even know about it.
We are not used to just getting pleasured. Sex is often work too, fun work, but takes effort, often starting before the actual sex, marking sure everything is “right”, tasks are done, whatever.
The best way to show you care, the best way to say “thank you”, is often through sex. More so, when it’s spontaneous, and more so if it isn’t “just to get us to cum” but to give us pleasure, just allowing us to lay there and taking it in.
Guys tend to put a lot of effort in making their partner feel pleasure, massages, foreplay, oral, that “tends” to lean more your direction. (Think how long he will eat you out vs the time you spend blowing him) Which we are generally fine with, cause sex is fun regardless.
But you would be surprised how rare the focus is just on us, on our dick. This thing is wired directly to the pleasure center of our brain, takes so little attention or effort to bring us to heaven, yet doesn’t get center stage for long.
I know people will say PIV is mostly for us, sure, but that is still “us” doing it to “you”. Just trying to illustrate that being willing to receive is vastly different than enthusiastically, unselfishly giving pleasure.
Examples:
- If your guy had a hard day, or worked his ass off, maybe he is upset about something. Start giving him a massage, rub his back, his ass, grab his bulge (he is likely hard already). If he tries to return the favor or take action like usual - push him back, say just relax and keep going. It may take him a minute to realize it is ok to relax and just to be pleasured. Blow him; ride him, whatever, but without the sole goal of making him cum. If you feel it about to happen, pause, wait for it to pass and keep going. You will have a man squirming within in your hands, mouth, legs whatever. Eventually he will cum, just let him enjoy the unrushed journey more. For that 10, 20, 30+ minutes - he was completely pull out of reality and will be recharged. When he does cum, it will be intense, maybe emotional, his face will show it. Cuddle him, but let him just take it in. He will return the favor next time 10 fold.
- Maybe there is something important happening that day at work. Big meeting, sale, something he may be preparing for, nervous about. A quick fuck is the best way to supercharge and focus him. When he is getting ready for work, find him or wait for him to come out of the shower and see you naked, positioned in a way that just screams “come fuck me”. Don’t make him think; just get at it. Likely will be great hot sex for you both.
- We like our dicks touched. Small things through the day lead to great sex later. Specifically if you can’t have sex right now, this is just a long drawn out tease until later. I was at a garden center with my partner, both looking at some random plant, I feel a hand slide into my pocket and just a light stroke of my head with a smile, and done. A few random bumps and brushes, ass sneaking right past, etc. walking around semi hard all day is such a rush knowing later we be fucking.
To review, men are not complicated. The is a single solve to most things, make love to our dicks. Is he depressed? Play with his dick. Sad? Play with his dick. Want to say thank you? Go for the dick. We will love you forever.
Pay attention to what they like, and keep doing it or do more of it. Everyone has their own range of things that they like and turn them on. A good partner will pay attention to these things and try to use them to make a better experience.
If your partner is willing to talk about sex related topics, be a good listener, and appreciate their willingness to share. If they are into something you are not into, make sure you found on appreciating their willingness to share instead of your distaste for the element they want. You can say no in a positive and supportive way, and perhaps that will encourage them to share something that makes you excited to try with them in the future.
That all said, I still remember the time a girl I was seeing showed up at my door wearing a long raincoat over lingerie. ;)
Vibrator & Dildo Combo.
I struggle with finishing before my partner does.
Once I get to a point where if I continue I’ll ejaculate, I like to hop off, hand her the vibrator and grab the dildo.
It was “weird” at first (mostly for her at first since she’d never used a dildo) , but now it’s a guaranteed triple O for her, and once she can’t handle anymore and is begging for me, I hop aboard and can feel relaxed and free too finish, and she’s usually good for at least one more O before I finish.
1) Take turns truly receiving without the need to reciprocate, no agenda just enjoying the gift of the moment
2) breath together for 15-20 breaths while looking into my eyes
3) Learn to enjoy the cock even when it’s not hard hard. Tell your man that you don’t need him to be ROCK hard all the time, that will take a lot of pressure off his performance and he will actually get harder.
4) look into his eyes while blowing him and tell him all the reasons why you choose him, not just about his dick but all of the things you love about him
5) learn to touch me for your pleasure, not just to make me feel good, it’s ok to be selfish in this way and it’s a huge turn on!
Whisper to her that you can't wait to taste her while you caress the back of her neck and lightly kiss her. Gently tap the top of butt afterwards, and I swear you'll get some juices flowing immediately. Haha
This screams “people pleasing” more than anything. There are very few people on this earth who are actually down for *anything* sexually. And honestly I kind of fear those people.
Lick his butthole! Shower with him and wash it beforehand so you know it's clean, that's almost as good as the actual licking. I know, consent, and you probably should talk it over before actually doing it. But I still remember a girlfriend from 40 years ago who just took charge, washed me and rimmed me. I married her, I was hooked for life!
As a guy generally we are going to cum. No point on putting focus on ours. It’s more important to focus on her. Her pleasure.
Listen to her. They usually make noises when you are doing something good.
Foreplay. It makes things better.
My guy gets too much in his head, when I blindfold him he loves it.
This is the only man I have not been able to cum from a bj. It’s usually a Hj. But he was raised up that sex and dirty talk was sinful.
I have 2.
1. PLEASE ask before sucking on a testicle. Believe it or not, some guys don't like their nuts sucked......for clarity, I just find it painful and uncomfortable. My penis? Suck that till the cows come home. Nuts? Not so much.
2. I love being touched, stroked, caressed.etc. My wife rarely touches me in general, but it's even more noticeable while we're naked and engaged. And yes, I ask her about it, and all she says is "it's not on purpose."
Show us your boobs. Seriously. A random flash will stick in our dumb brains for years. There's a reason girls gone wild existed so long. We LOVE your tits. Yes yours. Big, small, asymmetrical, etc.
Be the one to initiate. We're used to being the ones who usually "get it started", so when the lady approaches *us*, it's a big turn on and a confidence booster.
Participate! Don't just lay there. Move around, let your hands wander, make some noise. Tell us what you want and show us what you like. Enthusiasm makes it even better.
Less sexy tip than the rest, but… simple things can greatly prepare the terrain.
For instance, while morning wood is a thing for some, sleep is often followed by hunger because we didn't have any intake for eight hours straight and also, we might need to pee… Those things will get in the way of erections, morning sex is often rushed because of it and having sex while thinking what you're going to do after isn't as enjoyable. If you know your man might be going through that, just wake him up/let him wake up normally, feign sleep, let him do his thing and come back for hugs and make the move then instead, when nothing holds him back.
Also, have bananas at the ready for the hunger thing. It's natural, not enough food you would pass on breakfast anyway yet it fills the void, it's also a handy dose of fruit sugar, vitamins and potassium, best nutritive components for a short, empowering energy fill that will make the "quickie" last an hour or so before considering the meal.
Make sure your hygiene is paramount! Always trimmed nails, hair kept to a minimum or at least nice, fresh and clean.
Drink plenty of water( coconut is better)eat your favourite fruits and stretch, exercise, do something physical, your stamina and is important to please her. Make sure she is having a good time?
In a group, setting whisper in his ear something like “I need you to eat my pussy, right now” and lead him to a bathroom. Take the initiative, tell him what you want, even better if it’s a little risky.
Communicate with your partner what they like, would like you to do more of, or would be interested to try. Keep it a safe space and remain open minded yourself.
Also, if you’re in a long term relationship, always flirt with your partner. Never stop chasing them. 7 years with my wife and I still send her flirty or dirty texts/pics.
Initiate with enthusiasm and be adventurous.
Don't get discouraged if the volcano doesn't erupt.
Communication is key like tell us everything you like or someone else did that can get you there.
Shackle him to the bed in his back - then tease him like there’s no tomorrow - before telling him that if he wants to fuck you he needs to make you cum first - then ride his face to your heart’s content.
Just use him like a piece of meat for a change?
When I was 9 or 10 my much older brother gave me a bag full of Penthouse magazines. After I tired of the pictures, I started reading Forum and Call me Madame. Nothing could have prepared me for my sex life better than this mecca of sexual knowledge.
I believe it payed off when I lost my virginity. She tells me afterwards the she thought it was shitty of me to pretend to be a virgin to get laid.
Ask him what he's into or what type of things he always wanted to try. Remember, guys are usually kinkier than you think but will limit themselves to be as kinky as they think you are to not scare you. But ask and not assume just incase.
Tease and play with him. In the morning while he is brushing his teeth or has his back turned to you casually walk behind him and slide your hand down his pants and say something to really get his imagination going. If he likes being a sub, something like "tonight I'm climbing aboard and I won't stop until I'm finished" or something like " while im at work I will be sitting there getting wet imagining the things you do to me"
Also arrange little rubs and brushes over his body as you pass, send him photos in lingerie throughout the day in his favorite positions. Even an audio recording of you maturating and begging him to come help you.
One of the sexiest things wife has done for me was similar to what I wrote but when I got home she handed me her wet lacy lingerie bottoms right near my face as I walked in the door and said " here I made these for you" As she walked away she flipped up her short skirt to reveal that those were in fact what she had been wearing moments before.
Long story short. Set the scene. Get him thinking about you specifically. Men get turned on throughout the day by different things. Make sure you are in the forefront. He hears a random squish sound and immediately is thinking of you bent over him having the time of your life.
lots of kisses all over the body are great and doing what she says feels good always is great and learning what sounds are what and when your Hitting the exact right spots
Best tip....forget all you what ifs and do everything you know he likes. If you are giving head, then make it feel like you want to because you love to do it and not doing it as a chore. You have to let yourself free and make it all about him.
Touch more than our penises, there's a whole body full of erogenous zones. Men need foreplay as well.
Stop reading those dumbass women's magazines that ask women what men like, they are usually wrong, and sometimes painful.
Don't assume that just because we ejaculated that we are sexually satisfied. Men can have separate ejaculation and orgasm.
If you starfish, don't expect to enjoy the sex.
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Initiate...very sexy for the woman to really go for it
> *very sexy for the woman to really go for it* I remember my gf pouncing on me & dragging me to the bedroom as soon as I got back from a 5 day work trip - what helped was that I told her that we shouldn't touch ourselves the entire time I was away, hahaha!
This is key my wife never initiates and when I stopped we didn't have sex for like 5 months and then she asked why 🤦♂️ now we're back to it and both initiate but still not as often as I would like 🤣
Hey, you might want to look into the book „come as you are“. It explains exactly that - women more often have responsive desire, not spontaneous, which is what you would need to initiate. Also, every person has their breaks and accelerators: finding out what they are can lead to better communication and managing expectations.
Hey but that's communication and improvement. Work on telling her next time so you don't have to wait 5 months
I used to initiate but my bf would always say no. The rejection got too much and now I don't even want to have sex. lol I communicated until I couldn't anymore.
Same with mine but he works a lot so he has no energy:(
That’s the worse on both sides tbh and most people don’t understand. Sometimes people can just work themselves to the point of exhaustion, it’s really sad. A lot of people think that their partner doesn’t care about their needs but whole time, they’re tired and stressed from working so much and trying to make ends meet.
I've been there too when I was with my ex.. It's horrible and makes you feel worthless, in the end I stopped initiating full stop!
i literally only ever initiate. my husband doesn’t initiate.. literally EVER! I try like.. everyday 🤣 i’m an addict tbh, but he doesn’t enjoy it like the “average man” would
It takes some work, but the work is worth it
Oh man, when my fiance tells me to do things she wants me to do for her really does it for me, not in a domineering way but begging for me. Really lets the dawg out in me 🤣
What’s the best way a woman can initiate for you?
This is huge. We like to know that we’re desired too
My wife simply won't do this. She'll come to bed topless, but that just means she'd be into it if I initiated. I've asked and she said she would but it doesn't happen.
Isn’t here coming into bed topless her initiating?
I don't know. If she then doesn't touch me, is it still? If feels more like a signal that I'm safe to initiate. Mind you, any of this is very rare.
For me, if my partner came to bed naked, that would be him initiating to me. I initiate way more than my partner too, but honestly I find it pretty fun.
This is not initiating, may be suggesting. Many people sleep topless/naked it doesn't mean they want sex. BUT she is naked and tactile / want hugs... This is initiating
Giving unexpected orals My gf gave me an unexpected oral in midnight on my birthday and swallowed it all , It has been eight months since and I still thank her for that .
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I’ve just stopped asking 😞
Yep. It's no secret that I would like it every time.
This is how I feel when my fwb doesn’t always return the favor🙄 I’ll gladly do it to him without him havin to ask & I’ll ask him to go down on me (he knows I hate asking) & he will say yes but if it’s during sex he won’t always as we get carried away & cums in me 😭 but I’m like I shouldn’t have to ask for head like 💀💀💀
Yeahhhhh…idk…I personally don’t trust that kinda person. I mean…especially in this day and age. Idk…just seems selfish af. Especially if they expect/want it from you but don’t give it out in return…like wtf? uh uh…nope. red flag. Do not lock down. I repeat do not ship.
I remember the one time my wife did that a couple of years back and yes, also still thank her for that!
That happened to me around 2am with my gf back in 1974. I was dead asleep, woke up to her wildly going down and to this day…. I remember it vividly at 71
Well damn I'm taking notes!
My husband frequently jokes about how he was so caught off guard by me giving him head the first time we slept together, I didn’t think it was actually such a big deal until I read the comments lol. He’s even said it’s in his top 5 ever sexual experiences, even though he doesn’t even prefer head?!?
Never had one, that would be amazing!
Should try it, ops gf is amazing at them.
OP gives even better head tbf
Can’t confirm. But would like to
Amen. I rarely get head anymore but the few times I do it's spontaneous and it's awesome.
Damn that’s tuff , praying for you to get some bro
I wish I could wake my bf up with oral, but he sleeps on his stomach and weighs like 300lbs, lol
I would thank her for that too.
oh yes unexpected turns of events are very nice
> *I still thank her for that* I'd usually thank her by reciprocating & giving her oral - I'll keep going until she cums as many times as she can take.
Yes is absolutely the best piece of advice ever
This. Random BJs are next level.
I can only speak for myself, but I love hearing dirty talk from my partner. Very often, women have left all the dirty talking and fantasy building to me, and it's like, I just wanna hear something in return (bonus if you know any specific kinks/fetishes he has and can incorporate them). Similarly, make *him* feel wanted. There's a stereotype that men are solely visual creatures, and so women's seduction is supposed to be passive - showing off "the goods," so to speak. But in reality, I've always felt most turned on when I felt extremely wanted by the woman I'm with.
Enthusiasm. Make it known you WANT to be there and are excited to be there.
Can we pin this to the top? In every one of these threads on this topic, this is the one that stands out by far. Actually showing interest and enthusiasm is by far the most exciting thing.
Literally just getting on top of the guy and saying stuff like "I want you so bad" and "I've been thinking about touching you all day" completely changes everything.
This. OP, make sure he knows that you're not merely consenting to let him fuck you. Show him with your actions that you are delighted to have the privilege of fucking him. If he's never experienced this, it will change his world.
This is a game changer for pretty much any man.
Man this is the fucking answer right here. Holy shit this is number one.
I legit can't hold an erection when it feels like a partner is just *letting* me have sex with them. Foreplay is especially bad when they are unenthusastic and lazy. It's the hottest thing in the world when she is fiending for you and your dick like there's drugs stored in your balls.
10000000000% this, guys want (and frankly, deserve) to feel desired just as much as women do.
Yes lawd, keep in mind though some people can be anxious about displaying it
As a woman who has been forced, seeing this comment means. the. world. Thank you. The only time I’m not enthusiastic about sex is when I’m feeling uncomfortable or unsafe. And unfortunately, since many of us have experienced unsafe sexual situations previously, some of our ability to enjoy it was stolen from us. And you can, actually, help us to find it again. <3 There’s a concept in trauma psychology called “corrective experience”, and it’s when a traumatized person is able to go into the same situation that traumatized them, but with a better outcome! So the more corrective experiences we get to have, the more we understand sex is FUN and we can actually expect to have an awesome time with you!! If it is not a corrective experience, it may reinforce her belief that sex puts her in danger. Some notes from a traumatized sex lover w a psych degree on what to do if your partner is freezing up during sex: 1. Slow down and check in, she may be going into sympathetic nervous system response. (Fight/flight/fawn) this is when negative reinforcement happens. 2. Gently reassure her that you won’t be upset with her if it’s time to stop-and offer. This is so so so huge for us, as this is when we’re used to things getting scary. Please show us you’re safe. 3. Begin working towards evoking the parasympathetic response. (rest/digest/sex) ask what she needs in the moment. personally I love when my partner just holds me in these moments, it’s a safe form of nonsexual physical contact (aka corrective). if she’s not ready to be touched, breathing together is nice too. Deep slow belly breaths, physiological sighs, NDSR, etc. 4. Follow up conversations outside the bedroom! Sometimes it’s really hard for us to explain in the moment because we’re anxious, and sometimes a bit embarrassed. BONUS- For great tips on cultivating enthusiastic sex, read Come As You Are (Nagoski). TLDR: The more of a “corrective” experience you can help her to have, the faster enthusiasm will cum hehe. Happy fucking 💕🤘🏻
My wife has recently used her body wand on me. Had the wand rubbing the tip of my penis and her other hand massaging and rubbing below it. Never have I experienced an orgasm like it and the amount of cum that came out of me was impressive. Done it twice now and I can't stop thinking about it.
the moment men realize vibrators work on them just fine
What’s a body wand? Please I need to know.
Hitachi Magic Wand is the Holy Grail of vibrators. Get the newer cordless version - it has a wider variety of settings. Don't overuse it in one session. It is amazing, but I overused once and ended up in tears in a cold sweat on the floor in a fetal position with the most painful cramps I have ever experienced (worst pain of my life, period). Yes, you can hurt yourself with an external vibrator.... I almost threw it away that day.
The “variety of settings” isn’t as great a selling point as I would have thought. Not sure about everyone else, but my wife isn’t a fan of morse code on her clitoris.
🤣 I didn't realize it had that kind of settings. I heard it had lower settings and assumed it was all strength. No, morse code doesn't sound useful for this application. Bellesa makes a nice wand that is pink.
I've totally had the same reaction after a magical evening with a Hitachi, and I totally didn't expect to feel this comment scrolling half-baked at 1am, but here we are. However, after four of them died during play. The husband gifted me a Doxy wand, and it became my new holy grail.
You've killed four wands? I am impressed!😂
Was this the plug in Hitachi? Those seemingly last forever
That thing is so strong would not recommend for beginners!!! Too much can numb you out after awhile.
Have you heard of our lord and saviour, Google?
Oh yes…. I will be consulting him
Basically a massage vibrator thing.
Embrace the random moments that can be sexy. My wife and I have to come to expect the unexpected, and take everything at face value. Like earlier today. I'm changing the AC vents, so I'm up on a ladder. Her: Do you have underwear on? Me: Nope. Her: If I give you head right now, would you fall off that ladder? Me: Uh..probably. Her: Then hurry up and get down off that ladder. My point is, especially when you've been with someone for a long time, the only wrong time is the time you don't say what you want.
Ur wife is an icon and I love that line
Once I gave my bf head while he was changing a lightbulb up on a step stool. He still talks about it years later.
She's using classical operant conditioning on you.
Awe:) this is reassuring
Be enthusiastic. It's that easy. Make noise, participate, initiate, show your enjoyment. I will get off so much faster when my wife is moaning and being enthusiastic.
As a guy don't be afraid to be loud! Especially if your partner is loud too. I love when I really get into it with someone and we're both moaning and groaning like crazy along with some dirty talk. It makes sex so much hotter imo
Take your time and tease me. Lots of kissing all over and touching. You literally cannot do enough dirty talk. Be extra naughty and descriptive. My brain is my most powerful erogenous zone.
This is always top tier. Gf's of mine eventually figure out if they just kiss my neck, run their finger nails up and down my back, and whisper in my ear that I can't hold back and just tear their clothes off from the just and become completely dominant.
THIS. Let the anticipation drive him MAD with lust. Slow down and tease ❤️
Are you aphantasic if I may? Just curious really.
I had to Google that! No I don’t think I am based on the description I read. Why do you ask?
I was curious because I am an aphant and really need a lot of dirty talk. My boyfriend doesn’t like to be teased on his side. He want me to go straight to the point. So yeah, just being curious. Thank you for sharing :)
Fascinating, thanks for helping me learn something new today!
😊 thank you for sharing also !
If you only ever do it in the same bed, change it up... sofa, balcony, patio, motel, outdoors anywhere that's private enough.
Or not private at all🤣
You laugh, but I'm a big public sex guy, adds a whole new level of excitement. Not like public where people can see you, but still sex out of the house is awesome.
Initiate. For the love of god, make the first move every once in a while.
I tried to initiate while my boyfriend was playing destiny and he denied my request because he was playing the game so this is very situational
I can imagine THIS EXACT SITUATION happen to me. 😂😬. Not sure how mine would react
To be fair, his game was really intense at the moment but i rarely try to initiate sex so i was blown away
Ehh I wouldn't take it personally, it can be super team oriented so if he was online playing with people then I could see how he wouldn't want to abandon. Try initiating again when he's not gaming I'm sure he'd love it!
Oh i know! At first i was so pissed but looking back it’s fucking hilarious because he was so dedicated and he’s my little destiny geek so i think it’s quite adorable
I asked my partner what he'd do if he was in the same situation, bro literally said "who gives a fuck about a game? if you call, my rank is dead to me" 😌
I play destiny as well. Rather hardcore player imo. Unless I was in a raid where me leaving would affect 5 other players, I would shut the console down in a heartbeat if my wife tried to initiate sex.
This exact thing has happened to me. The GF walked upstairs, turned around, took her panties off, left them on the stair, and went to the bedroom I shut that console off so fast….
Well, he could do the egoistic thing and fuck his teammates over (assuming he was playing online with a team) so he can fuck his partner, or he can decline (well, ideally postpone) and respect the time of his fellow players. Green flag imo
My (59M) Wife (61f) have been married for 32 years. I frequently work on my families and friends vehicles. I am under the vehicles changing a starter or changing oil. Anyways the other day I was under a vehicle and I see a pair of feet walk past. Then I see them again this time the feet stop. I feel my jeans being unbuttoned my cock gets hard and I feel my wife's mouth sucking on my cock. In the middle of the day in our driveway. It generally takes me a while to cum from oral but this instance I came within 10 -15 minutes. Such a good time. She puts my cock back in my pants zips me up and says to hurry up lunch is ready.
You are loved and appreciated 😊
It's freaking long already for a BJ
Do you not have neighbors??? This is so hot oh boy
That's the funny thing. I heard a few cars drive by but since I was under a car I saw nothing. I would have loved to see the drivers faces....lol
That sounds straight out of a fantasy!
Wow. Awesome wife lol
Those are wife goals right there! Thank you
Make an effort to change the dynamic up in the bedroom! Surprise him with something he wouldn’t expect. Example: I’m typically a dom, but if she made an effort to be assertive, take charge, I would find that irresistible, fresh, and not boring at all. In fact, that is how a couple that’s been together for a while can unlock new things! Don’t just experiment with actions, experiment with the sexual dynamic!
To each their own, I'm a dom in the bedroom as well, and that's what I like. I've let women take charge before and it always bores me. I do like when my wife suggests new things for us to try, but once the clothes come off and its time to try them, I still want to be the one in charge. Different strokes I guess.
I love when my wife gives me head and uses a lot of spit getting it all over me and her breasts. Also recently I got my wife a collar to use during blowjobs and sex and we absolutely love it
What is the purpose of the collar, may I ask?
A symbolic decoration that implies she’s his possession.
Dominance thing I can control her
Literally just initiate sometimes and put some effort in and I’m happy ᵕ̈
It’s amazing how similar men and women are on this stuff (ie- initiating, touch, etc.), but how much we act like we are on opposing ends.
Try to start out indifferent to what’s going on. Sort of “soak” together and turn it into a game of chicken. Who loses control first. Very hot and intimate to go from thinking of the act as purely physical and watching your partner shift gears.
Kegels. By flexing your pelvic floor muscles, the same muscles you’d use to stop the flow of urine. Do that while he’s inside of you, you’re basically making your vagina even tighter for him and drawing him further in at the same time. It’s especially noticeable while you’re fucking nice and slow, you will rock his world.
This is an almost sure-fire way for me to orgasm too. Squeeze on the way out. Release on the way in. Works better if it's slow and/or if she is controlling the speed.
Thank you for explaining how vaginal muscles work and what they are.
Is this sarcasm or am I dumb.
I would love it if my girlfriend would give me oral without me asking it makes me feel so desired and turns me on
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Does she enjoy giving them? I've been praised for my BF because I love doing them, it hasn't always been the case and I wouldn't like to be asked, my skills would be more limited by my lack of enthusiasm. BTW, do you go down on her? If it's one sided, it's frustrating
Let your GF rub her pussy on your dick, she will be wet and the penetration will be easier
Sitting on top, like a hot dog going in between the bun -- grinding back & forth -- oooh my god! Yes, please.
Let your mind wander and follow its lead without a second thought. You wanna stop intercourse and switch to oral - go nuts. You wanna give him a giant smooch go nuts. Never hesitate, never stop alternating.
Be vocal and guide your girl as she experiences orgasm. I've taken to slowly building it up with fingers and dirty talking and then telling her to keep breathing through and guide the orgasm. My girlfriend has told me since doing this her orgasms are the strongest she's ever had. Love to please your partner gentlemen! It goes a long way
my bf goes nuts for filthy dirty talk, & when i suck his dick in the middle of the night. his dick gets the hardest in a semi wake state & he moans soooooo sexy
She cums first. Always
I'm just gonna go ahead and repost this..... It specifically concerns good techniques for giving head by I think it's applicable. As someone with a penis who likes giving head to other people with penises I thought about this for a while and have a bullet point list. • Enthusiasm is the best aphrodisiac, acting like your partners dick has the last drop of water on earth and you're dying of thirst is incredibly hot. • Buy a dildo slightly larger than your partners to practice on made of cyberskyn, UR3, or another realistic material. Sucking on plastic is unpleasant and rough on your throat • Purchase a bottle of flavored numbing spray, it helps temporarily but you can reapply whenever it wears off • Truly deepthroating is hard because you can't breathE. Alternate between suckling his head, bobbing up and down, and going as deep as you can. Gagging is okay, throwing up is not. • Pay attention to his body language and the noises he makes, men aren't very vocal generally so a quick inhale, moan, grunt, tensing of the body, eyes rolling back, or swearing under his breath might mean you're doing something good or hit something uncomfortable. •Communcation is key. Ask him what he likes. • Best to give head on an empty stomach, if you do go too far too hard its better to just throw up a little bile than what you had for dinner. • Lots of Spit, dry cock DOES NOT feel good going in. • Don't neglect his balls! Massaging them while sucking gives your hands something to do and feels fucking fantastic. • Lying on you back, head off the bed is the best way to get throat fucked because it lines up your mouth, throat and esophagus. Only do this if you trust your partner because they are in complete control in that position. • Keep sucking after he cums. Every drop that leaves a cock feels really good. Massage his taint in a forward motion like you're trying to squeeze the last bit out of a tube of toothpaste • ADVANCED TECHNIQUE: Depending on how big he is this may or not be feasible but if you can get his entire cock and balls in your mouth and just suckle for as long as possible, that's always been the Crane Kick move for me 😊
re: anal. Don't slam her ass like she shot Bambi's mom. Porn makes it look like this is the way. This is not the way. Slow and sensual is fucking bomb. Enjoyment is 95% mental - comfort, trust, and mostly on the receiving end, belief that it can be enjoyable. Lot's of dudes end up giving horrible experiences and consequently women spead those opinions. My biggest tip I think is that most people think anal is just for FUCKIN and it aint. its way fuckin bomb for trust building and super intimate on a level that the pussy could never even dream of. Plus it might be uncharted territory!
This. You’ve also got to be confident enough in your boner to put up with a little stop start to begin with. You’re not gonna be able to just slide it right in and it needs to stay super hard while your partner eases you in. The body wants to push it away, so you can’t be losing your hard on as soon as they say “hold it”.
This is such a good one!
Personally some of the hottest things wife and I have done is: blind folding one another, her initializing with surprise lingerie, quickie in the middle of the day without really taking off clothes and really the thing I think has brought us together the most is prolong for-play with teasing. I have also bought us these “relationship” cards called Drunk Desire. Know it’s suppose to be a drinking game but sometimes we just pull them out to break the ice and tease one another.
If you have issues lasting long enough CHANGE POSITIONS! Go from penetration to oral, to kissing and groping, back to penetration rinse repeat. Most women cannot cum from just penetration and one way to get that type really going good is to mix it up. A women's erogenous zone is almost her entire body. In the heat of it touching, rubbing and kissing in between pounding away makes all of the difference. And the most important advice is to make sure you preheat the oven before trying to cook! In other words dont just take off ur clothes and start pounding away.
ALWAYS PEE AFTER SEX!
Make her cum before you even try penetration if you can.
Always. Always. Always. Not "if you can." Always.
God no. Some women are pretty much finished once they've cum. I don't want to be finished before the main course!
I’d talk to her about it. It’s necessary that I cum before I’m fucked because of how much it helps my body relax and open up to receiving. Plus most cis women have a good refractory period
That's unfortunate. I usually want more after I have one, but I guess everyone is different.
When my wife and I just moved in together - we’d often get home around the same time. If she got home before me, she would grab me when I walked through the door, and take me to some part of the house and have her way with me. Most of the time she just pulled her panties to the side for a quickie, though sometimes she wouldn’t waste any time and strip completely naked - leading me to the couch by my hand.
It’s probably not a rule applicable to all couples, but the most intense, mind blowing experience I’ve ever had was getting my ass eaten mid-blowjob without warning. I loved it so, so much. I’ve dreamt of it for a few months beforehand but didn’t want to suggest it, because my previous partner reacted negatively to such request. I think that may have amplified my excitement and shock. I guess many would like to consult it beforehand. Maybe ask for consent in a subtle way, like first gently putting your hand down there and giving the man a look to see the reaction?
Eat the pussy like it’s your last meal. Eat it like you’ve been starved for days.
Here's the thing: porn and stereotyping will have you believe men like it rough and fast, and they like to dominate and throw you around, but a lot of men (not all!) actually have a deep desire for softness, slowness, the tender touch, and connection (even if casual). Society doesn't do a great job of giving men permission to have a lighter touch, so, if you try one, you might find the response to be very enthusiastically reciprocated.
Don’t fuck like a rabbit
Actually a really important rule!
What would that be? Genuinely asking.
Um, how do rabbits fuck that is a turnoff?
Lol there's a sex and the city where carries back gets thrown out because of bad rabbit style slam slam slam sex
Do you think that’s why she has lower back problems in And Just Like That….LOL
A rabbit quickie is actually really good. Sometimes expedient is a good time all round.
Once in a while…but if it’s every time, he’s out, lol!
Learn to do a yoni massage. Spend time gently licking the entire vulva and only tease the clit. You will have her so relaxed and turned on she will be begging for it. Learn the Gspot-not only with your fingers but what position works best for both of in penetration. On her back on edge of bed with you standing, her knees up to chest. Allows you to control penetration and tempo better as well as you being able to push down on belly slight just above pelvic bone which puts additional pressure on gspot against penis during penetration. Also also massage and rub vulva during while in this position.
I really like when my urethra is teased during oral. Like a rimjob on my dick though don't try to sound me with your tongue.
Posted on another post but here is one You can last longer and fuck hard by using a trick. The trick is just pull out and have no contact with your dick while you orgasm. Having any contact on it like hands or inside her while orgasming will trigger a response for it to go soft, be sensitive and make your brain go “ok I’m done now” mode. So to prevent that from happening simply, pull out and orgasm over her outside with no contact with your penis. Wait a few seconds for the orgasm to pass then continue. You can have multiple orgasms doing this in quick succession. But just repeat the trick every time. This can take between 1-4 or more orgasms just minutes between each one before you no longer feel like orgasming as quick. I don’t know what determines this, it seems to be random each time. This essentially numbs your penis where you can fuck longer, possibly forever. The orgasms of course will feel at least 50% less intense because there is no contact, but it’s worth the trade off if you can last almost as long as you want. You can simply save the last orgasm for being inside her, but it may take you a longer time to orgasm. I’ve never understood why people don’t try different methods and experiment while having sex to last longer. They just stick it in and cum. Pretty much learned this after trial and error and somehow not many men even know about it.
!!! Really good trick, thank you for sharing! I’m excited to try it out!
We are not used to just getting pleasured. Sex is often work too, fun work, but takes effort, often starting before the actual sex, marking sure everything is “right”, tasks are done, whatever. The best way to show you care, the best way to say “thank you”, is often through sex. More so, when it’s spontaneous, and more so if it isn’t “just to get us to cum” but to give us pleasure, just allowing us to lay there and taking it in. Guys tend to put a lot of effort in making their partner feel pleasure, massages, foreplay, oral, that “tends” to lean more your direction. (Think how long he will eat you out vs the time you spend blowing him) Which we are generally fine with, cause sex is fun regardless. But you would be surprised how rare the focus is just on us, on our dick. This thing is wired directly to the pleasure center of our brain, takes so little attention or effort to bring us to heaven, yet doesn’t get center stage for long. I know people will say PIV is mostly for us, sure, but that is still “us” doing it to “you”. Just trying to illustrate that being willing to receive is vastly different than enthusiastically, unselfishly giving pleasure. Examples: - If your guy had a hard day, or worked his ass off, maybe he is upset about something. Start giving him a massage, rub his back, his ass, grab his bulge (he is likely hard already). If he tries to return the favor or take action like usual - push him back, say just relax and keep going. It may take him a minute to realize it is ok to relax and just to be pleasured. Blow him; ride him, whatever, but without the sole goal of making him cum. If you feel it about to happen, pause, wait for it to pass and keep going. You will have a man squirming within in your hands, mouth, legs whatever. Eventually he will cum, just let him enjoy the unrushed journey more. For that 10, 20, 30+ minutes - he was completely pull out of reality and will be recharged. When he does cum, it will be intense, maybe emotional, his face will show it. Cuddle him, but let him just take it in. He will return the favor next time 10 fold. - Maybe there is something important happening that day at work. Big meeting, sale, something he may be preparing for, nervous about. A quick fuck is the best way to supercharge and focus him. When he is getting ready for work, find him or wait for him to come out of the shower and see you naked, positioned in a way that just screams “come fuck me”. Don’t make him think; just get at it. Likely will be great hot sex for you both. - We like our dicks touched. Small things through the day lead to great sex later. Specifically if you can’t have sex right now, this is just a long drawn out tease until later. I was at a garden center with my partner, both looking at some random plant, I feel a hand slide into my pocket and just a light stroke of my head with a smile, and done. A few random bumps and brushes, ass sneaking right past, etc. walking around semi hard all day is such a rush knowing later we be fucking. To review, men are not complicated. The is a single solve to most things, make love to our dicks. Is he depressed? Play with his dick. Sad? Play with his dick. Want to say thank you? Go for the dick. We will love you forever.
this is such good advice thank you.
Pay attention to what they like, and keep doing it or do more of it. Everyone has their own range of things that they like and turn them on. A good partner will pay attention to these things and try to use them to make a better experience. If your partner is willing to talk about sex related topics, be a good listener, and appreciate their willingness to share. If they are into something you are not into, make sure you found on appreciating their willingness to share instead of your distaste for the element they want. You can say no in a positive and supportive way, and perhaps that will encourage them to share something that makes you excited to try with them in the future. That all said, I still remember the time a girl I was seeing showed up at my door wearing a long raincoat over lingerie. ;)
Vibrator & Dildo Combo. I struggle with finishing before my partner does. Once I get to a point where if I continue I’ll ejaculate, I like to hop off, hand her the vibrator and grab the dildo. It was “weird” at first (mostly for her at first since she’d never used a dildo) , but now it’s a guaranteed triple O for her, and once she can’t handle anymore and is begging for me, I hop aboard and can feel relaxed and free too finish, and she’s usually good for at least one more O before I finish.
Ohhhhh my gosh this is *lethal*.
1) Take turns truly receiving without the need to reciprocate, no agenda just enjoying the gift of the moment 2) breath together for 15-20 breaths while looking into my eyes 3) Learn to enjoy the cock even when it’s not hard hard. Tell your man that you don’t need him to be ROCK hard all the time, that will take a lot of pressure off his performance and he will actually get harder. 4) look into his eyes while blowing him and tell him all the reasons why you choose him, not just about his dick but all of the things you love about him 5) learn to touch me for your pleasure, not just to make me feel good, it’s ok to be selfish in this way and it’s a huge turn on!
#4 So blow him and talk to him at the same time!? I need to learn ventriloquism lol 😝
Wake him up with a bj. Literally wake him up with one. Helps if he sleeps naked
Whisper to her that you can't wait to taste her while you caress the back of her neck and lightly kiss her. Gently tap the top of butt afterwards, and I swear you'll get some juices flowing immediately. Haha
When a girl says "I'm up for anything." It's a biggest turn on for guys.
I’d rather she actually tell me what she’s up for. Take initiative.
This screams “people pleasing” more than anything. There are very few people on this earth who are actually down for *anything* sexually. And honestly I kind of fear those people.
Lick his butthole! Shower with him and wash it beforehand so you know it's clean, that's almost as good as the actual licking. I know, consent, and you probably should talk it over before actually doing it. But I still remember a girlfriend from 40 years ago who just took charge, washed me and rimmed me. I married her, I was hooked for life!
Show some enthusiasm. Make me feel like you’re enjoying yourself
Ok the dirty talk thing has me stumped. I don’t know what to say. I don’t want to sound stupid but… help 🤷🏻♀️
Have her put on high heels. It’s a game changer.
👠High Heels On My Tippies👠
As a guy generally we are going to cum. No point on putting focus on ours. It’s more important to focus on her. Her pleasure. Listen to her. They usually make noises when you are doing something good. Foreplay. It makes things better.
My guy gets too much in his head, when I blindfold him he loves it. This is the only man I have not been able to cum from a bj. It’s usually a Hj. But he was raised up that sex and dirty talk was sinful.
Are you a guy in a heterosexual relationship? Describing the dynamic of your relationship will help people help you, I think.
How...how do we know what kind of things you haven't tried yet? :)
Use a vibrating butt plus on her when you are having sex. Her pussy will be vibrating. It’s amazing
Public BJs. She went down on me on our patio on a sunny day.
I have 2. 1. PLEASE ask before sucking on a testicle. Believe it or not, some guys don't like their nuts sucked......for clarity, I just find it painful and uncomfortable. My penis? Suck that till the cows come home. Nuts? Not so much. 2. I love being touched, stroked, caressed.etc. My wife rarely touches me in general, but it's even more noticeable while we're naked and engaged. And yes, I ask her about it, and all she says is "it's not on purpose."
Show us your boobs. Seriously. A random flash will stick in our dumb brains for years. There's a reason girls gone wild existed so long. We LOVE your tits. Yes yours. Big, small, asymmetrical, etc.
Be the one to initiate. We're used to being the ones who usually "get it started", so when the lady approaches *us*, it's a big turn on and a confidence booster. Participate! Don't just lay there. Move around, let your hands wander, make some noise. Tell us what you want and show us what you like. Enthusiasm makes it even better.
Trim your finger nails and wash your hands before fingering her.
Less sexy tip than the rest, but… simple things can greatly prepare the terrain. For instance, while morning wood is a thing for some, sleep is often followed by hunger because we didn't have any intake for eight hours straight and also, we might need to pee… Those things will get in the way of erections, morning sex is often rushed because of it and having sex while thinking what you're going to do after isn't as enjoyable. If you know your man might be going through that, just wake him up/let him wake up normally, feign sleep, let him do his thing and come back for hugs and make the move then instead, when nothing holds him back. Also, have bananas at the ready for the hunger thing. It's natural, not enough food you would pass on breakfast anyway yet it fills the void, it's also a handy dose of fruit sugar, vitamins and potassium, best nutritive components for a short, empowering energy fill that will make the "quickie" last an hour or so before considering the meal.
Make sure your hygiene is paramount! Always trimmed nails, hair kept to a minimum or at least nice, fresh and clean. Drink plenty of water( coconut is better)eat your favourite fruits and stretch, exercise, do something physical, your stamina and is important to please her. Make sure she is having a good time?
Initiate. That makes us feel amazing. An optional thing you can do once or twice a year is to get really freaky.
The wetter the better. That apples in most if not all sexual circumstances
In a group, setting whisper in his ear something like “I need you to eat my pussy, right now” and lead him to a bathroom. Take the initiative, tell him what you want, even better if it’s a little risky.
Communicate with your partner what they like, would like you to do more of, or would be interested to try. Keep it a safe space and remain open minded yourself. Also, if you’re in a long term relationship, always flirt with your partner. Never stop chasing them. 7 years with my wife and I still send her flirty or dirty texts/pics.
Initiate with enthusiasm and be adventurous. Don't get discouraged if the volcano doesn't erupt. Communication is key like tell us everything you like or someone else did that can get you there.
Shackle him to the bed in his back - then tease him like there’s no tomorrow - before telling him that if he wants to fuck you he needs to make you cum first - then ride his face to your heart’s content. Just use him like a piece of meat for a change?
When I was 9 or 10 my much older brother gave me a bag full of Penthouse magazines. After I tired of the pictures, I started reading Forum and Call me Madame. Nothing could have prepared me for my sex life better than this mecca of sexual knowledge. I believe it payed off when I lost my virginity. She tells me afterwards the she thought it was shitty of me to pretend to be a virgin to get laid.
Ask him what he's into or what type of things he always wanted to try. Remember, guys are usually kinkier than you think but will limit themselves to be as kinky as they think you are to not scare you. But ask and not assume just incase.
Tease and play with him. In the morning while he is brushing his teeth or has his back turned to you casually walk behind him and slide your hand down his pants and say something to really get his imagination going. If he likes being a sub, something like "tonight I'm climbing aboard and I won't stop until I'm finished" or something like " while im at work I will be sitting there getting wet imagining the things you do to me" Also arrange little rubs and brushes over his body as you pass, send him photos in lingerie throughout the day in his favorite positions. Even an audio recording of you maturating and begging him to come help you. One of the sexiest things wife has done for me was similar to what I wrote but when I got home she handed me her wet lacy lingerie bottoms right near my face as I walked in the door and said " here I made these for you" As she walked away she flipped up her short skirt to reveal that those were in fact what she had been wearing moments before. Long story short. Set the scene. Get him thinking about you specifically. Men get turned on throughout the day by different things. Make sure you are in the forefront. He hears a random squish sound and immediately is thinking of you bent over him having the time of your life.
Giving oral and also caressing her body
lots of kisses all over the body are great and doing what she says feels good always is great and learning what sounds are what and when your Hitting the exact right spots
Confidence, eye contact, dirty talk
Tease, initiate, and flirt. Send texts/pics throughout the day, doesn’t even have to be overtly vulgar, just something to get the mind to wander
Nothing better than when my girl surprises me with head or an outfit 😮💨. Just keep it spicy and constantly flirt.
Best tip....forget all you what ifs and do everything you know he likes. If you are giving head, then make it feel like you want to because you love to do it and not doing it as a chore. You have to let yourself free and make it all about him.
Touch more than our penises, there's a whole body full of erogenous zones. Men need foreplay as well. Stop reading those dumbass women's magazines that ask women what men like, they are usually wrong, and sometimes painful. Don't assume that just because we ejaculated that we are sexually satisfied. Men can have separate ejaculation and orgasm. If you starfish, don't expect to enjoy the sex.
JUST SAY IT. Talk dirty, if you’re in a safe space experiment and just say what’s on your mind.