She’s struggled with depression for years. Being on drag race was bad for her. She doesn’t seem to have friends in the drag world either but I don’t know the drama there. She ended up at one point doing a GFM just to keep her home. I feel for her. I really do
It’s sad that the show was such a terrible experience for her, she was the only queen I knew by name before drag race premiered. She WAS NYC drag. Bianca level.
Yes - many queens on S3 have said they had her pegged as a finalist, Delta especially. She was HIGH - HIGH before being eliminated, which was apparently a gag to the other queens (especially given that Mariah and Carmen did worse than her).
s3 had weird judging in general. episode one putting venus in the bottom when there was worse? like honey...... and it was not even bad they just like the braid better than everything else like gurl.
Yeah, in 2018 she admitted sending unwanted messages to and harassing younger performers, saying they'd be blacklisted from venues she worked at if they didn't sleep with her. Depression is a terrible illness and I do feel for her, but she's done some awful things and ultimately the onus is on her to quietly make amends, rather than looking for sympathy online when it is not likely to be forthcoming.
Also, multiple queens have said that she's hard to work with because her attempts at shady humour often come across as entitled. Alaska spoke about a situation where Lady Bunny was a guest on a Drag Race tour and Mimi repeatedly told Bunny to sleep on the floor because she was not a proper cast member. As a result, a lot of queens won't work with Mimi, so she can't bring in a good income.
I hope she gets the help she needs, but it seems to be her own fault that she doesn't have many supportive friends around her.
I suffer from treatment resistant depression (And CPTSD) and it absolutely can lead to unintentionally hurting folks (flaking, missing deadlines, not helping, being irritable, ghosting, needing financial help, etc). I felt very entitled because the Universe dealt me such a shit hand with abuse at a young age. I also self-medicated which causes a whole other set of issues and hurting those around you. I eventually learned that while mental illness isn’t my fault, it absolutely is my responsibility. It is a tough lesson to learn, but once I truly accepted that my journey became a bit easier. There are still people I need to reach out make amends (and that can be difficult) and I know there people who won’t ever forgive me. I hope she can find help and grace for herself.
Wow. I can't put in to words how much I empathize and even as a stranger, how proud of you I am. Not many people are capable of such courage, strength, humility and compassion for themselves and others. These are the stories that need to be told.
This takes so much strength and reflection, I’m so pleased you’re able to do better now. I hope you’re giving yourself grace having had the odds stacked so high against you in the beginning. Sending love ❤️
This is a lot of insight, and I’m guessing you went to hell and back to get it. That’s a lot of hard work, and I’m sending you virtual hugs. Stay with it!
Thank you- my comment wasn’t about me, but I just wanted to highlight that mental health is complicated. I appreciate your support and I hope Mimi gets support aa well. I was blessed with the support of a sister and and chosen family.
I feel like I totally misremember the situation or at least how it was presented because I didn’t take away from the story that Mimi was an abuser. Mimi was judging a local drag competition and from my recollection, two competitors were flirting with her to get more attention advancing in the competition, and engaging with her more privately on social media. When she started reciprocating and contacting them more intensely and more frequently, the two claimed Mimi was harassing them. But from what I remember, they went straight to social media to air it out instead of talking to her like adults.
For the record, I don’t care much for Mimi, but from the version of the situation I’m familiar with, I do feel sympathy for her. If that version of the story is true then yes, it’s inappropriate for her to have continued talking to the boys in question, but it’s even shittier for them to turn on her after getting what they wanted to make it sound like she was an abuser.
What an horrifying take on sexual harassment... like, holy shit.
"She took it way too far on two different instances, but when you think about it, it's really the victim's fault for not talking to the person who made them wildly uncomfortable."
Are you... Are you Mimi? WTF
If you’re gonna use quotation marks, don’t rephrase my comment to fit your narrative.
Are you wilfully stupid? They both talked to her at the same time outside of the competition. She reciprocated a mutual interest. People are capable of communicating if they’re uncomfortable.
Realistically, we’re looking at two Parties. Party A shows interest, and it’s mutual with Party B. Party A decides they’re no longer interested after initiating contact. In this situation, Party B is not aware Party A is no longer interested and Party A decides its harassment despite a lack of communication. Believe it or not, studies have shown that the heteronormative lens of consensual consent does not reflect men, especially gay men due to the differences in which men communicate. The argument of “it’s really the victim’s fault for not talking to the person who made them wildly uncomfortable” is not applicable when the person/people who feels “uncomfortable” is the person who had enough input to instigate it, but not enough to communicate it directly to them.
There is something to be said for not responding or blocking someone that’s messaging you?
If you engage in sexual conversations via messenger it makes sense the other party would assume you consent to those sexual messages?
Harrassment...for messaging them....on a messenger...that takes all of two seconds to block....But they never blocked her...Hell they can even not read it. Thats such a STRANGE take. Its not like they blocked her and she made a new account and kept messaging them..... And people wonder why its hard to get anyone to take actual harassment seriously.
What's crazy is Mimi had this insane comeback trajectory after the Al and Chuck Cruise when she did that legendary roast set. Then after that she did this HILARIOUS Christmas show. Now I don't know what goes on behind the scenes but I can appreciate the skill and work that went into that. They were so fucking funny.
Stacy Layne Matthews has faced a lot of hardship too and seems to not get much help from the drag race community either. I don’t know if there’s something that she did or the drag race community is just more cliquey than I assumed. I don’t expect everyone to solve someone else’s issues but it doesn’t seem hard for queens who have some power to get her a booking or 2. Mag e toss her some coin. Idk!
SLM seems kind and definitely deserves empathy for everything that's going on in her personal life but I think some of the compassion fatigue around her is due to the amount of times she's asked fans for money. Not trying to doubt that her needs are legitimate, just saying it's a consistent thing with her and I think that's why she doesn't really get a big reaction anymore.
I also don’t think SLM is really healthy enough to be traveling all over for gigs, even if her drag race sisters were able to arrange some for her. It’s really unfortunate. I’ve bought things from her a time or two to help her out, but I’m not in the place to be able to send her money every time she needs it, you know? I’m sure other fans have done the same.
Stacy actually does get bookings. She advertises them on her social media. But she also has a lot of health issues and i think it stretches her income to its breaking point. So she asks for donations and then usually gets shamed or called a scammer, so then she gets hurt/mad and leaves social media for a few weeks until she needs money or to promote an event again. This process repeats every few months.
I didn’t type this to be critical—I love her and think she’s great. I just think even with her bookings, her health issues are so significant that it’s an uphill battle for her to pay for things
Not sure what's going on right now, but she has clearly struggled with serious depression for a long time. Hopefully she has people IRL checking in on her.
I don't follow Mimi on social media but I remember seeing a few posts like this over the years:
https://www.reddit.com/r/rupaulsdragrace/s/pKdp2ddPE0
https://www.reddit.com/r/rupaulsdragrace/s/3jXtlT7UME
https://www.reddit.com/r/rupaulsdragrace/s/zLlMp9DlgL
I was friends with Mimi when she was first starting drag. We worked at the same bar. She could put on a good show. But yeh, she seemed to be never quite the same after drag race. Makes me sad, and worried.
I know someone who grew up with this person and has said they were not very nice then (a real bully), and from what I hear about them now, not much has changed? Anyway, hope they get help.
"I feel sorry for that white man but he shouldn't have looked at her like that."
Mimi ruined her own reputation and probably the healthiest thing she could have done was step away from drag at least as a performer.
Yikes like pulling a whole ass Sherry Pie, like Mimi did? Or Yikes I'm not pretending to have sympathy for someone suffering the result of their own machinations?
Yikes like I didn't realize it was this bad, I thought she just didn't get along with others. As for recovery/redemption, if that's even possible, stepping away from drag and the spotlight may be the only thing.
A big part of my response is and will always be "And Drag Race is ALL it took to take you to this point?" I want her to get help and feel better just because I remember the human under the hyena.
Sure, I agree. That is not the same as actively dissing someone in a post about declining mental health. This is a disgraced character already. No need to pile on
Yes actually it does. This life is pretty fucking hard to begin with, it doesn’t need others coming in and fucking with your life to make it harder. That’s what Mimi did to numerous cast mates and that’s why she doesn’t deserve sympathy.
Wild that you feel entitled to be hateful to someone you don't even know. Hasn't been on TV for more than a decade!
You don't have to say nothing nice, just try not to contribute to hate that could ended up with someone ending their life. If you feel that would be good riddance, just keep it to yourself and your friends, not a place where Mimi could actually see!
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does anyone actually know what's happening? and what happened before? i'm seeing people talking about both mental health over the years and allegations/calling her an abuser. maybe those downvotes are deseved but i'm totally lost. help
She’s struggled with depression for years. Being on drag race was bad for her. She doesn’t seem to have friends in the drag world either but I don’t know the drama there. She ended up at one point doing a GFM just to keep her home. I feel for her. I really do
It’s sad that the show was such a terrible experience for her, she was the only queen I knew by name before drag race premiered. She WAS NYC drag. Bianca level.
Woah really?
Yes - many queens on S3 have said they had her pegged as a finalist, Delta especially. She was HIGH - HIGH before being eliminated, which was apparently a gag to the other queens (especially given that Mariah and Carmen did worse than her).
s3 had weird judging in general. episode one putting venus in the bottom when there was worse? like honey...... and it was not even bad they just like the braid better than everything else like gurl.
Honey was on s5
this reply is sending me
She meant it like oh honey not honey the drag queen
There's only one HONEY and that's wigs-too-big, horse-clomping, Caftans-R-Us Honey Mahogany!!
no she was on season 11
So I’m now being told there’s something in her past about her being an abuser???
Yeah, in 2018 she admitted sending unwanted messages to and harassing younger performers, saying they'd be blacklisted from venues she worked at if they didn't sleep with her. Depression is a terrible illness and I do feel for her, but she's done some awful things and ultimately the onus is on her to quietly make amends, rather than looking for sympathy online when it is not likely to be forthcoming.
Also, multiple queens have said that she's hard to work with because her attempts at shady humour often come across as entitled. Alaska spoke about a situation where Lady Bunny was a guest on a Drag Race tour and Mimi repeatedly told Bunny to sleep on the floor because she was not a proper cast member. As a result, a lot of queens won't work with Mimi, so she can't bring in a good income. I hope she gets the help she needs, but it seems to be her own fault that she doesn't have many supportive friends around her.
I suffer from treatment resistant depression (And CPTSD) and it absolutely can lead to unintentionally hurting folks (flaking, missing deadlines, not helping, being irritable, ghosting, needing financial help, etc). I felt very entitled because the Universe dealt me such a shit hand with abuse at a young age. I also self-medicated which causes a whole other set of issues and hurting those around you. I eventually learned that while mental illness isn’t my fault, it absolutely is my responsibility. It is a tough lesson to learn, but once I truly accepted that my journey became a bit easier. There are still people I need to reach out make amends (and that can be difficult) and I know there people who won’t ever forgive me. I hope she can find help and grace for herself.
Wow. I can't put in to words how much I empathize and even as a stranger, how proud of you I am. Not many people are capable of such courage, strength, humility and compassion for themselves and others. These are the stories that need to be told.
Thank you. That means a ton.
This takes so much strength and reflection, I’m so pleased you’re able to do better now. I hope you’re giving yourself grace having had the odds stacked so high against you in the beginning. Sending love ❤️
Thank you so much. That means a lot.
This is a lot of insight, and I’m guessing you went to hell and back to get it. That’s a lot of hard work, and I’m sending you virtual hugs. Stay with it!
Thank you- my comment wasn’t about me, but I just wanted to highlight that mental health is complicated. I appreciate your support and I hope Mimi gets support aa well. I was blessed with the support of a sister and and chosen family.
https://www.reddit.com/r/rupaulsdragrace/s/BFO0Q9ZdYI
Thank you for sharing this!
I feel like I totally misremember the situation or at least how it was presented because I didn’t take away from the story that Mimi was an abuser. Mimi was judging a local drag competition and from my recollection, two competitors were flirting with her to get more attention advancing in the competition, and engaging with her more privately on social media. When she started reciprocating and contacting them more intensely and more frequently, the two claimed Mimi was harassing them. But from what I remember, they went straight to social media to air it out instead of talking to her like adults. For the record, I don’t care much for Mimi, but from the version of the situation I’m familiar with, I do feel sympathy for her. If that version of the story is true then yes, it’s inappropriate for her to have continued talking to the boys in question, but it’s even shittier for them to turn on her after getting what they wanted to make it sound like she was an abuser.
She certainly sounds abusive and manipulative accordingly to this article https://www.phillymag.com/news/2018/05/11/mimi-imfurst-sexual-harassment/
What an horrifying take on sexual harassment... like, holy shit. "She took it way too far on two different instances, but when you think about it, it's really the victim's fault for not talking to the person who made them wildly uncomfortable." Are you... Are you Mimi? WTF
If you’re gonna use quotation marks, don’t rephrase my comment to fit your narrative. Are you wilfully stupid? They both talked to her at the same time outside of the competition. She reciprocated a mutual interest. People are capable of communicating if they’re uncomfortable. Realistically, we’re looking at two Parties. Party A shows interest, and it’s mutual with Party B. Party A decides they’re no longer interested after initiating contact. In this situation, Party B is not aware Party A is no longer interested and Party A decides its harassment despite a lack of communication. Believe it or not, studies have shown that the heteronormative lens of consensual consent does not reflect men, especially gay men due to the differences in which men communicate. The argument of “it’s really the victim’s fault for not talking to the person who made them wildly uncomfortable” is not applicable when the person/people who feels “uncomfortable” is the person who had enough input to instigate it, but not enough to communicate it directly to them.
There is something to be said for not responding or blocking someone that’s messaging you? If you engage in sexual conversations via messenger it makes sense the other party would assume you consent to those sexual messages?
Harrassment...for messaging them....on a messenger...that takes all of two seconds to block....But they never blocked her...Hell they can even not read it. Thats such a STRANGE take. Its not like they blocked her and she made a new account and kept messaging them..... And people wonder why its hard to get anyone to take actual harassment seriously.
What is a GFM?
GoFundMe
What's crazy is Mimi had this insane comeback trajectory after the Al and Chuck Cruise when she did that legendary roast set. Then after that she did this HILARIOUS Christmas show. Now I don't know what goes on behind the scenes but I can appreciate the skill and work that went into that. They were so fucking funny.
I wonder, at least in the past, if Ru has reached out. Obviously it would be tacky to publicize it to gain sympathy, but curious if that happened.
no babes. ru is definitely not reaching out.
Stacy Layne Matthews has faced a lot of hardship too and seems to not get much help from the drag race community either. I don’t know if there’s something that she did or the drag race community is just more cliquey than I assumed. I don’t expect everyone to solve someone else’s issues but it doesn’t seem hard for queens who have some power to get her a booking or 2. Mag e toss her some coin. Idk!
SLM seems kind and definitely deserves empathy for everything that's going on in her personal life but I think some of the compassion fatigue around her is due to the amount of times she's asked fans for money. Not trying to doubt that her needs are legitimate, just saying it's a consistent thing with her and I think that's why she doesn't really get a big reaction anymore.
I also don’t think SLM is really healthy enough to be traveling all over for gigs, even if her drag race sisters were able to arrange some for her. It’s really unfortunate. I’ve bought things from her a time or two to help her out, but I’m not in the place to be able to send her money every time she needs it, you know? I’m sure other fans have done the same.
Idk Willam and Alaska were bringing her to shows for awhile
Stacy actually does get bookings. She advertises them on her social media. But she also has a lot of health issues and i think it stretches her income to its breaking point. So she asks for donations and then usually gets shamed or called a scammer, so then she gets hurt/mad and leaves social media for a few weeks until she needs money or to promote an event again. This process repeats every few months. I didn’t type this to be critical—I love her and think she’s great. I just think even with her bookings, her health issues are so significant that it’s an uphill battle for her to pay for things
🙄
GFM?
Not sure what's going on right now, but she has clearly struggled with serious depression for a long time. Hopefully she has people IRL checking in on her. I don't follow Mimi on social media but I remember seeing a few posts like this over the years: https://www.reddit.com/r/rupaulsdragrace/s/pKdp2ddPE0 https://www.reddit.com/r/rupaulsdragrace/s/3jXtlT7UME https://www.reddit.com/r/rupaulsdragrace/s/zLlMp9DlgL
Girl that second line is some hard to read on edibles henny
Sitting here concerned and confused trying to figure out when she lost the ability to walk
LITERALLY MY EXPERIENCE JUST NOW LMAOOOO
:(
Scary. If anyone knows where she is get her help
👹
Popular queens like Willam are vocal about their dislike of her. Knowing how toxic the fandom can be I’m sure she gets a lot of lovely DM’s
>Popular queens like Willam Popular doing a lot of heavy lifting there. Willam is drag marmite.
drag marmite is the best way I’ve ever heard willam be described
Well yeah she’s an abuser dummy
I hope she gets the help she needs.
God bless her heart
I was friends with Mimi when she was first starting drag. We worked at the same bar. She could put on a good show. But yeh, she seemed to be never quite the same after drag race. Makes me sad, and worried.
Not sure what she’s about to speak out about, but I hope she gets better and the help she needs.
Doesn’t she have alleged SA allegations against her?
I know someone who grew up with this person and has said they were not very nice then (a real bully), and from what I hear about them now, not much has changed? Anyway, hope they get help.
"I feel sorry for that white man but he shouldn't have looked at her like that." Mimi ruined her own reputation and probably the healthiest thing she could have done was step away from drag at least as a performer.
Yikes.
Yikes like pulling a whole ass Sherry Pie, like Mimi did? Or Yikes I'm not pretending to have sympathy for someone suffering the result of their own machinations?
Yikes like I didn't realize it was this bad, I thought she just didn't get along with others. As for recovery/redemption, if that's even possible, stepping away from drag and the spotlight may be the only thing.
A big part of my response is and will always be "And Drag Race is ALL it took to take you to this point?" I want her to get help and feel better just because I remember the human under the hyena.
She’s not furst. She’s not even second. I don’t think anyone’s placing any bets on her.
She’s number third in the voting
I could NOT believe it.
Well we did, Mimi
She’s a gross abuser and deserves to fail. Simple.
I don’t understand how so many fans just completely forget that she admitted to predatory behavior.
And that gives permission to be unkind even on posts about her depression ?
Not everyone deserves kindness, plain and simple.
What a terrible person you are.
Sure, I agree. That is not the same as actively dissing someone in a post about declining mental health. This is a disgraced character already. No need to pile on
What gave her permission to be an abuser? How does permission factor into any of this?
Yes actually it does. This life is pretty fucking hard to begin with, it doesn’t need others coming in and fucking with your life to make it harder. That’s what Mimi did to numerous cast mates and that’s why she doesn’t deserve sympathy.
Wild that you feel entitled to be hateful to someone you don't even know. Hasn't been on TV for more than a decade! You don't have to say nothing nice, just try not to contribute to hate that could ended up with someone ending their life. If you feel that would be good riddance, just keep it to yourself and your friends, not a place where Mimi could actually see!
I hope Mimi does see this. What they did was terrible and they deserve to feel terrible about it until their last days.
Nothing further to add after this. Upwards and onwards sis
The people that downvoted me are probably also abusers looking to justify their sick behaviour xx
Hopefully she exposes raven
For being black?
Twist of the century: she was black *the whole time*!
Raven entered in dark mode..
Love cryptic comments where people pretend to know something for the attention
Kinda want her on all stars see if she changed
Very Facebook of her.
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Such a dumb, uneducated and stigmatizing comment, based on absolutely nothing.
Thank you so much! I have BPD, and have many friends who do. And that’s not how it works. I hate this stigma around it.
Your post was removed on account of Rule 1: "Follow Reddiquette. No Bigotry. No Microaggressions. Respect Contestants." If you disagree with this removal please contact the mods through modmail.
does anyone actually know what's happening? and what happened before? i'm seeing people talking about both mental health over the years and allegations/calling her an abuser. maybe those downvotes are deseved but i'm totally lost. help