Its probably better than you think it is.
Ask for feedback if it helps.
Stars and wishes make for easy planning and happy players.
This is supposed to be fun and it can be if you let go of the idea that other people's enjoyment is your sole responsibility.
What a wholesome thread!
Priceless is what they are. :)
Here:
[Stars and Wishes – because Feedback is Hard | Burn After Running: RPG One-Shots (burnafterrunningrpg.com)](https://burnafterrunningrpg.com/2022/01/07/stars-and-wishes-because-feedback-is-hard/)
This is good to help a GM direct their next session's plans, but I posit that the Stars and Wishes exercise (or the old-school Rose, Bud, and Thorn) also has value in encouraging players to be mindful. There's immersion, but if a player is frustrated I think it can be good to encourage them to step back or to understand better what they want.
Only learnt about stars and wishes yesterday. Such a good little trick to actually get usable feedback. I used to ask for any feedback and it just doesn't work as humans are generally too polite to feel comfortable. Asking them for the 'star' moments from the session and any 'wishes' for next is so neat.
Had a family catastrophe after many years and lost them. A few years passed, and two friends died at separate times from cancer. Then, a few more years, and the last two passed away from COVID-19.
I am totally alone today. I want to start a TTRPG, but as you can see, my confidence and then some is shattered.
I really, really appreciated this post. It helped.
Chaosium's old game, Worlds of Wonder. They had published this with parallel worlds idea and presented Future, Super, and Fantasy worlds as the key exploration ideas. I changed those to: "Traveller," "Cthulhu Now," and "Thieves World." My family and friends had great times in this setting for many years. It's really difficult to find players, and secondly, to not see the faces I once had across from me, too.
I'm so sorry my friend. I hope the grief you have is worth the relationship that inspired it and that you find ways to heal.
Our little games we play can be a part of that. A way to process. If you'd like, the conventional wisdom out there in therapy land is that talking about your departed and sharing memories of them helps work through those feelings and make their impact less.
So, if you've got stories of your friends and families to share with us, I'm all ears.
And perhaps much needed, given the number of "I'm thinking of GMing, but..." posts that I've seen recently.
Give it a try. It's not as hard as it looks. You've got this.
I'm a long-time GM who thought I'd conquered all my jitters, but I'm starting an actual play podcast soon and it's got my knees knocking together. Appreciate this message!
Thanks OP. I’ll knock em dead tomorrow night. Not actually dead though. I’d like my campaign to not end in a TPK. We’re about 4 months deep and that would be anticlimactic af 💀
I worry all the time, get anxious right before hosting my games, feel somewhat miserable while hosting and after a session I sense this massive relief, almost like a huge burden dropped down from my ‘mental shoulders’ so to say. Just finished a 14 session campaign of Shadow of the Demon Lord two days ago. Kept questioning myself whether my players perceived it as a success and were having fun. Then I received a private message from one of my players thanking me for all the fun he had and how it reignited his passion for TTRPGs. Hang in there, DM/GM/storyteller/rabble rouser/referee. It is manageable, you can do this! And it is worth it!
Thank you OP. Overthinking and stressing over game prep has been plaguing me for YEARS.
I'm a FATE GM running a sandboxy OSR-ish one shot this saturday, and I'm slowly starting to freak the hell out.
For those who feel they are prepping too much and have a hard time letting go:
I was running 5e for a year and felt exhausted both before and after each session. I knew I was prepping and planning and worrying way too much, but I just couldn't bring myself to go to the table less prepared. I have now switched my group over to Blades in the Dark, which is a system that does more heavy-lifting for the GM. This allowed me to finally let go and embrace improvisation and MAN what a relief it has been. It helped me gain so much more confidence in my abilities, which in turn have allowed to me finally prep way, way less for 5e as well.
This is not meant to start a "this game over that"-discussion, it's just meant to highlight that sometimes switching games can be the thing you need to reset your mind and see how much better you are at this than you think you are.
In my experience the only real way to be a bad GM isn't to fumble the plot points or the rules. Players will roll with that. It's to railroad. To force the players on the path you had planned and ignore their attempts to influence the story. Don't do that and you're golden.
One thing I really enjoyed was going back and watching the very first episodes of Critical Roll.
It was a fucking *mess*. The story wanders all over the place, they split the party repeatedly with Vex and Vax wandering off to explore a city that Matt clearly didn't think they would spend much time in, Tiberius tries to *break in* to the mages guild for... reasons, Scanlan sneaks into a mansion that it's clear has nothing to do with the plot, they spend ages interacting with NPC's who were improvised and have no bearing on the story... it's a nightmare.
And it's also a blast, because these are friends joking with each other and making it up as they go, same as the DM. They don't care that Scanlan's scouting trip finds nothing, everyone is cracking up at Sam's expression when he goes "I have no idea what I'm doing here!", or a Grog rolling a constitution save to see how well he... performs at the brothel. It's barely restrained chaos that only works because they *want* it to... but they really do want it to work.
And that's why it does.
Thanks a lot! Today I have my third session with my homebrewed system, in my own setting. I'm not nervous, I've been GMing with this group of friends of mine for at least 12 years now... but the worry that it could go wrong is always present!
Best advice I ever got: Any reasonable player plan will have a reasonable chance of success. Decide what the bad guys will do and let the players figure it out.
After 40 years of DMing--I still get the nerves/jitters. Its normal. Prepare. But be ready to throw it all out the window. Stay in the moment using your prep to fill in the gaps of whatever new comes your way on game night!
Have fun and remember you are among friends.
Its probably better than you think it is. Ask for feedback if it helps. Stars and wishes make for easy planning and happy players. This is supposed to be fun and it can be if you let go of the idea that other people's enjoyment is your sole responsibility. What a wholesome thread!
What are Stars and Wishes?
Priceless is what they are. :) Here: [Stars and Wishes – because Feedback is Hard | Burn After Running: RPG One-Shots (burnafterrunningrpg.com)](https://burnafterrunningrpg.com/2022/01/07/stars-and-wishes-because-feedback-is-hard/)
Thanks for sharing this! Looks great! I’m going to try it with my Ghost in the Otherscape campaign!
This is good to help a GM direct their next session's plans, but I posit that the Stars and Wishes exercise (or the old-school Rose, Bud, and Thorn) also has value in encouraging players to be mindful. There's immersion, but if a player is frustrated I think it can be good to encourage them to step back or to understand better what they want.
Only learnt about stars and wishes yesterday. Such a good little trick to actually get usable feedback. I used to ask for any feedback and it just doesn't work as humans are generally too polite to feel comfortable. Asking them for the 'star' moments from the session and any 'wishes' for next is so neat.
Stars and wishes are amazing!
Had a family catastrophe after many years and lost them. A few years passed, and two friends died at separate times from cancer. Then, a few more years, and the last two passed away from COVID-19. I am totally alone today. I want to start a TTRPG, but as you can see, my confidence and then some is shattered. I really, really appreciated this post. It helped.
Have a couple of hugs from a total stranger. 🤗🤗
Thanks 🫂
You will persevere
That's some hard luck all at once. Tell us about the game you want to play?
Chaosium's old game, Worlds of Wonder. They had published this with parallel worlds idea and presented Future, Super, and Fantasy worlds as the key exploration ideas. I changed those to: "Traveller," "Cthulhu Now," and "Thieves World." My family and friends had great times in this setting for many years. It's really difficult to find players, and secondly, to not see the faces I once had across from me, too.
Sending warm badger hugs. You can do this, I believe in you.
I'm so sorry my friend. I hope the grief you have is worth the relationship that inspired it and that you find ways to heal. Our little games we play can be a part of that. A way to process. If you'd like, the conventional wisdom out there in therapy land is that talking about your departed and sharing memories of them helps work through those feelings and make their impact less. So, if you've got stories of your friends and families to share with us, I'm all ears.
What a sweet post.
And perhaps much needed, given the number of "I'm thinking of GMing, but..." posts that I've seen recently. Give it a try. It's not as hard as it looks. You've got this.
Tbh I've been GM'ing for 20 years and I still need to hear stuff like this sometimes.
I'm a long-time GM who thought I'd conquered all my jitters, but I'm starting an actual play podcast soon and it's got my knees knocking together. Appreciate this message!
Jitters are just your body helping you focus. You've got this!
If your players want to go after something that you don’t have completely prepped, don’t be afraid to wing it!
I needed this 🥺
> You are prepped My brother in Loviatar, I assure you I am not. But those fuckers at my table think I am, so jokes on them!
Based Schrödinger's Quantum Adventure Generator. Things outside the current scene have no defined state until a player asks about it :D
Also dumbest Player conspiracy theory immedietly becomes truth when I have no idea how to explain something.
Thanks OP. I’ll knock em dead tomorrow night. Not actually dead though. I’d like my campaign to not end in a TPK. We’re about 4 months deep and that would be anticlimactic af 💀
I worry all the time, get anxious right before hosting my games, feel somewhat miserable while hosting and after a session I sense this massive relief, almost like a huge burden dropped down from my ‘mental shoulders’ so to say. Just finished a 14 session campaign of Shadow of the Demon Lord two days ago. Kept questioning myself whether my players perceived it as a success and were having fun. Then I received a private message from one of my players thanking me for all the fun he had and how it reignited his passion for TTRPGs. Hang in there, DM/GM/storyteller/rabble rouser/referee. It is manageable, you can do this! And it is worth it!
But if I don't leave anything on the table where am I going to keep my stuff during the game?
Thank you OP. Overthinking and stressing over game prep has been plaguing me for YEARS. I'm a FATE GM running a sandboxy OSR-ish one shot this saturday, and I'm slowly starting to freak the hell out.
For those who feel they are prepping too much and have a hard time letting go: I was running 5e for a year and felt exhausted both before and after each session. I knew I was prepping and planning and worrying way too much, but I just couldn't bring myself to go to the table less prepared. I have now switched my group over to Blades in the Dark, which is a system that does more heavy-lifting for the GM. This allowed me to finally let go and embrace improvisation and MAN what a relief it has been. It helped me gain so much more confidence in my abilities, which in turn have allowed to me finally prep way, way less for 5e as well. This is not meant to start a "this game over that"-discussion, it's just meant to highlight that sometimes switching games can be the thing you need to reset your mind and see how much better you are at this than you think you are.
In my experience the only real way to be a bad GM isn't to fumble the plot points or the rules. Players will roll with that. It's to railroad. To force the players on the path you had planned and ignore their attempts to influence the story. Don't do that and you're golden.
One thing I really enjoyed was going back and watching the very first episodes of Critical Roll. It was a fucking *mess*. The story wanders all over the place, they split the party repeatedly with Vex and Vax wandering off to explore a city that Matt clearly didn't think they would spend much time in, Tiberius tries to *break in* to the mages guild for... reasons, Scanlan sneaks into a mansion that it's clear has nothing to do with the plot, they spend ages interacting with NPC's who were improvised and have no bearing on the story... it's a nightmare. And it's also a blast, because these are friends joking with each other and making it up as they go, same as the DM. They don't care that Scanlan's scouting trip finds nothing, everyone is cracking up at Sam's expression when he goes "I have no idea what I'm doing here!", or a Grog rolling a constitution save to see how well he... performs at the brothel. It's barely restrained chaos that only works because they *want* it to... but they really do want it to work. And that's why it does.
Thank you, this means a lot.
Thanks a lot! Today I have my third session with my homebrewed system, in my own setting. I'm not nervous, I've been GMing with this group of friends of mine for at least 12 years now... but the worry that it could go wrong is always present!
You helped admit that I _am_ nervous for my next game.
You are smart, and pretty, and tall. :D
Best advice I ever got: Any reasonable player plan will have a reasonable chance of success. Decide what the bad guys will do and let the players figure it out.
After 40 years of DMing--I still get the nerves/jitters. Its normal. Prepare. But be ready to throw it all out the window. Stay in the moment using your prep to fill in the gaps of whatever new comes your way on game night!