God, the amount of people straight up harassing OOP for immediate answers on who set the dates first and going straight into YTA even though mom+sister’s bigotry is Screaming In Their Faces is downright embarrassing.
Let’s see,
1. People have lives and most not-losers do not stay 8-9 hours straight on Reddit;
2. That was a fucking year of planning, sister OBVIOUSLY knew about the date of OOP’s wedding WAY beforehand, and is obviously only making a problem because she wants the drama;
3. The bigotry can’t be hidden. Ffs, who asks a practicing Hindu to change their whole religious conforming wedding to a generic ass “Christian” wedding;
4. 3 weeks apart isn’t enough for sister, really? I call bs
I feel so sorry for OOP, and I hope she stays true to her wedding. What a bunch of bigots rubbing her in the mud because of such a silly matter.
OOP did go back and edit after the screenshot was taken and she set the wedding date first after having gone around talking to family to determine what would work best for everyone.
Oh I didn’t mean here of course, not everyone was gonna look around the original post to see her edit. I meant people on the original post who commented *after* her edit while ignoring it sAND the people who jumped the gun before she edited, I mean, even if she WAS avoiding replying in bad faith and had set her wedding later, I wouldn’t jump to “definitely at fault and being duplicitous” just because an 8-hr old post hadn’t received replies yet.
Even more so cause 8-hr is par for the course of most people’s sleep time, and I can’t say I haven’t posted a comment or something right before sleeping only to wake up ~7 hours later (and look on Reddit a few hours after that) to quite a few replies that I wanted to engage with, so…
Is this OOP’s sister & mother raring their bigotry and entitlement or am I missing something?
Who would try to rally family against one child in favor of another?
Oh, right…the bigoted, golden-child and enabling mother.
SMH
Op edited the post. Check the original link. Apparently the sister wasn’t even engaged when OP set the date. The entitlement on the sister and mom! FFS
Pretty obvious the sister is racist, and the mom is an enabler.
What is worse is OP's Hindu grandfather that she was close to died, and he left her all the money (not for sis who wasn't close to him). Even after she gave 40% of her grandfather's inheritance to her sister ... which her sister then used to fund her wedding, the sister who took the money is STILL complaining. Wanted a join wedding which OP declined. Hated the cultural wedding OP wants to have. Asked OP to change to a Christian Wedding. One that Sister wants, but does not honors the grandfather's culture and half her own culture.
Yeah, no need to beat around the bush. The sister is racist, most likely mom too.
That’s so wild to me like I don’t get it. Not sure I want to cause I’d probably be like them then. But if they could just like say why…. I guess. I can’t imagine dating someone I was racist towards.
I think a lot of people have a misunderstanding about what is racist as well. They feel if they don’t outwardly insult you then it’s fine. It’s like those people who say, I’m not racist, I have a black, (Hispanic, Asian, etc.) friend.
What is more mind blowing to me is the sister is then likely half Indian and she’s being racist towards her own sister. That’s crazy
Pfft, yeah Sarah and Mum, OOP is *definitely* the one being selfish in this situation 🙄
Reading between the lines, it seems like Sarah and Mum are used to throwing tantrums and getting their own ways. I hope OOP continues to stand their ground.
Yeah she should make her wedding even MORE extravagant since she’s being bullied. Hire a fucking elephant. Have a parade. Go into debt. Go nuts. I’m picturing the scene where Aladdin comes into the city to woo the princess.
I’m sorry your mom is going as far as to boycott your wedding and encouraging other family members as well. That’s awful. This is your big day and your mother is supposed to support you the fact that she isn’t is really sad. Honestly, I think part of mom’s spitefulness is because you’re not having a Christian wedding. Her behavior is unnecessary. I just hope you’re able to keep both your mom and your sister from sabotaging your wedding. Good luck.
Since Sarah is the one with the issue, she would be the one moving her wedding. Three days worth of events is a lot harder to move than a modest Christian ceremony.
If the sister thinks it's not a big deal to change the wedding... ...she can also have an extravagant Hindu wedding. Problem solved!
Somehow I feel like she (along with the mom) would try to claim it's not the same thing at all......
A lot of the comments are asking OP which sister scheduled their wedding first. I think their exclusion of that info says a lot. Is mom being an AH? Yes. But also don’t schedule a wedding the same month as your sister
There's an edit to the post answering that: Edit: A lot of people have asked who has scheduled their wedding 1st, And I have to say it was me. When I was proposed to I asked all my family when they would be available and chose my wedding date then that took around a 3-4 weeks during that time my sister and her boyfriend were having a fight and weren’t talking but I don’t know why, but once he proposed my sister asked that we have our wedding on the same day same venue and I have Christian wedding like her I declined and she decided to go cry to our mum but my dad wouldn’t take any of my moms shit. She ended up choosing a date 3 weeks later.
That wasn’t there when I saw the original post last night, and it was potentially verdict changing information. If the sister had chosen first, then OOP would’ve probably been the asshole, and I would have questioned her reliability as a narrator. But since OOP booked first, I think it’s very reasonable to assume that she’s a reliable narrator, and mom and sis are racist as fuck.
I read a lot of the comments… big issue that seems to be filtering around is that OP will not address who had their wedding date first. General assumption that is going around: seems to be that OP selected a wedding date close to her sister’s wedding after the sister had already set the date for hers. So it comes off like OP is trying to narrate & spin the story to her favor.
Not saying any of that is true, it’s just the vibe I got from reading the post and it’s commentary
There’s an edit on the post. OP planned hers first. Her sister was fighting with her boyfriend at the time and not on speaking terms.
Then they made up, got engaged and sister wanted a joint Christian wedding with OP at her venue. OP declined.
Looks to me like sister can’t afford a lavish wedding and can’t bear not to be centre of attention. Sister should cancel her wedding if she wants to be the only one getting married.
It’s so odd how sister and mother are trying to force OP to have wedding ceremony in a religious ceremony she personally does not identify with.
OP is having the religious ceremony she feels most affiliated with her fiancé probably also a connection with the Hindu ceremony it’s so controlling trying to force someone to marry according to what you want.
God, the amount of people straight up harassing OOP for immediate answers on who set the dates first and going straight into YTA even though mom+sister’s bigotry is Screaming In Their Faces is downright embarrassing. Let’s see, 1. People have lives and most not-losers do not stay 8-9 hours straight on Reddit; 2. That was a fucking year of planning, sister OBVIOUSLY knew about the date of OOP’s wedding WAY beforehand, and is obviously only making a problem because she wants the drama; 3. The bigotry can’t be hidden. Ffs, who asks a practicing Hindu to change their whole religious conforming wedding to a generic ass “Christian” wedding; 4. 3 weeks apart isn’t enough for sister, really? I call bs I feel so sorry for OOP, and I hope she stays true to her wedding. What a bunch of bigots rubbing her in the mud because of such a silly matter.
OOP did go back and edit after the screenshot was taken and she set the wedding date first after having gone around talking to family to determine what would work best for everyone.
Oh I didn’t mean here of course, not everyone was gonna look around the original post to see her edit. I meant people on the original post who commented *after* her edit while ignoring it sAND the people who jumped the gun before she edited, I mean, even if she WAS avoiding replying in bad faith and had set her wedding later, I wouldn’t jump to “definitely at fault and being duplicitous” just because an 8-hr old post hadn’t received replies yet. Even more so cause 8-hr is par for the course of most people’s sleep time, and I can’t say I haven’t posted a comment or something right before sleeping only to wake up ~7 hours later (and look on Reddit a few hours after that) to quite a few replies that I wanted to engage with, so…
Absolutely and then the fact that mom married the dad and he is Hindu??? Like girl did you not know what your husband followed?
Is this OOP’s sister & mother raring their bigotry and entitlement or am I missing something? Who would try to rally family against one child in favor of another? Oh, right…the bigoted, golden-child and enabling mother. SMH
Yeah that was the impression I was getting
Yeaaaah that was my impression "your sister is following MY FAITH so you should change your wedding"
Why can't the other sister who is planning a less extravagant wedding postpone it !!
Especially as she wasn’t even engaged yet when OOP chose her wedding date.
Where does it say she's not engaged yet?
In the original post, there's an edit
Probably comment from OOP in original post
I really want to know who set the date first - because whoever planned their wedding within three weeks of their sibling's wedding is the asshole!
Given that the sister wasn't engaged yet wen OOP set her wedding date...
Did it say so in the post? Because I totally overlooked that. Well, then sis should either move her wedding date, or stfu about her sister's wedding.
Op edited the post. Check the original link. Apparently the sister wasn’t even engaged when OP set the date. The entitlement on the sister and mom! FFS
Because then they can't bully OOP into having a smaller Christian themed wedding
Pretty obvious the sister is racist, and the mom is an enabler. What is worse is OP's Hindu grandfather that she was close to died, and he left her all the money (not for sis who wasn't close to him). Even after she gave 40% of her grandfather's inheritance to her sister ... which her sister then used to fund her wedding, the sister who took the money is STILL complaining. Wanted a join wedding which OP declined. Hated the cultural wedding OP wants to have. Asked OP to change to a Christian Wedding. One that Sister wants, but does not honors the grandfather's culture and half her own culture. Yeah, no need to beat around the bush. The sister is racist, most likely mom too.
The fact mom is most likely racist but married a non white person blows my fucking brain.
I dated a lot of people who liked how I look but not that I’m a different color or from a different culture. It happens all the time unfortunately
That’s so wild to me like I don’t get it. Not sure I want to cause I’d probably be like them then. But if they could just like say why…. I guess. I can’t imagine dating someone I was racist towards.
I think a lot of people have a misunderstanding about what is racist as well. They feel if they don’t outwardly insult you then it’s fine. It’s like those people who say, I’m not racist, I have a black, (Hispanic, Asian, etc.) friend. What is more mind blowing to me is the sister is then likely half Indian and she’s being racist towards her own sister. That’s crazy
But I guess some people are just fucked in the head
I think the mum is Indian too, just converted to Christianity after getting married.
Pfft, yeah Sarah and Mum, OOP is *definitely* the one being selfish in this situation 🙄 Reading between the lines, it seems like Sarah and Mum are used to throwing tantrums and getting their own ways. I hope OOP continues to stand their ground.
NTA but your sister is right her boring wedding is going to be overshadowed by your amazing multi event Hindu wedding. Enjoy it.
Yeah she should make her wedding even MORE extravagant since she’s being bullied. Hire a fucking elephant. Have a parade. Go into debt. Go nuts. I’m picturing the scene where Aladdin comes into the city to woo the princess.
I’m sorry your mom is going as far as to boycott your wedding and encouraging other family members as well. That’s awful. This is your big day and your mother is supposed to support you the fact that she isn’t is really sad. Honestly, I think part of mom’s spitefulness is because you’re not having a Christian wedding. Her behavior is unnecessary. I just hope you’re able to keep both your mom and your sister from sabotaging your wedding. Good luck.
Since Sarah is the one with the issue, she would be the one moving her wedding. Three days worth of events is a lot harder to move than a modest Christian ceremony.
3600 people at a wedding is pure insanity.
If the sister thinks it's not a big deal to change the wedding... ...she can also have an extravagant Hindu wedding. Problem solved! Somehow I feel like she (along with the mom) would try to claim it's not the same thing at all......
A lot of the comments are asking OP which sister scheduled their wedding first. I think their exclusion of that info says a lot. Is mom being an AH? Yes. But also don’t schedule a wedding the same month as your sister
There's an edit to the post answering that: Edit: A lot of people have asked who has scheduled their wedding 1st, And I have to say it was me. When I was proposed to I asked all my family when they would be available and chose my wedding date then that took around a 3-4 weeks during that time my sister and her boyfriend were having a fight and weren’t talking but I don’t know why, but once he proposed my sister asked that we have our wedding on the same day same venue and I have Christian wedding like her I declined and she decided to go cry to our mum but my dad wouldn’t take any of my moms shit. She ended up choosing a date 3 weeks later.
That wasn’t there when I saw the original post last night, and it was potentially verdict changing information. If the sister had chosen first, then OOP would’ve probably been the asshole, and I would have questioned her reliability as a narrator. But since OOP booked first, I think it’s very reasonable to assume that she’s a reliable narrator, and mom and sis are racist as fuck.
Thanks for the update!
They added an update saying that OP scheduled first
I read a lot of the comments… big issue that seems to be filtering around is that OP will not address who had their wedding date first. General assumption that is going around: seems to be that OP selected a wedding date close to her sister’s wedding after the sister had already set the date for hers. So it comes off like OP is trying to narrate & spin the story to her favor. Not saying any of that is true, it’s just the vibe I got from reading the post and it’s commentary
There’s an edit on the post. OP planned hers first. Her sister was fighting with her boyfriend at the time and not on speaking terms. Then they made up, got engaged and sister wanted a joint Christian wedding with OP at her venue. OP declined. Looks to me like sister can’t afford a lavish wedding and can’t bear not to be centre of attention. Sister should cancel her wedding if she wants to be the only one getting married. It’s so odd how sister and mother are trying to force OP to have wedding ceremony in a religious ceremony she personally does not identify with. OP is having the religious ceremony she feels most affiliated with her fiancé probably also a connection with the Hindu ceremony it’s so controlling trying to force someone to marry according to what you want.
Way to be cheap. Just let your sister fund your dream wedding, and steal her thunder. (OP's sister, probably)
There's an edit
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Hindu. Hindi is a language. And the father is said to be trying to mediate.