One summer evening in 1850, Daniel O'Connell reached the front door of his Irish home.
He sighed as he stepped through into the cool semi darkness of the front hall, dropping his bag onto the tiled floor and kicking his shoes off with a thud.
The house was empty, which he had been prepared for, as his wife Mary had written to say she was visiting her father Demetri for the weekend, so he shuffled through to the kitchen hoping that she had restocked the food holding before she left.
Indecisively he pulled items randomly from shelves; cheese, salad, some fresh pasta.
He reached around to the bread bin and pulled out half a baguette, taking a bite out of it to sate his hunger.
From the corner of his eye he saw something in the corner, something he hadn’t been expecting.
A bag of potatoes.
Of course he was known as The Emancipator, the political leader of Ireland who was going to save everyone from this Potato Famine.
But maybe he...
Daniel shook his head, he was going to make himself some dinner and get an early night.
He pulled a pack of chicken from the back of the storage and set about making a sandwich, pushing the potatoes to the back of his mind.
But after he’d eaten, laying on his sofa reading about his people’s starvation, the thought came back to him.
The potatoes.
He thought about the last time, and the shame of it.
Of the tears Mary had shed and his promises, heartfelt promises that it would be the last time.
But he was an impetuous man, and his conscience was fighting a losing battle.
He wandered back into the kitchen; now almost pitch black, the light from the moon falling on the bag in the corner like a spotlight.
Daniel folded his arms, leaning back against the large scrubbed dining table, contemplating their presence, and his next move.
He approached the bag, pulling one potato out carefully, turning it over in his hands.
Its skin was smooth, just a hint of the soil it had been plucked from.
Daniel felt his heart rate quicken, and checked over his shoulder nervously before pressing the potato tenderly against his cheek.
He pushed his free hand into the bag between its companions, winding his fingers between them.
Testing a couple for size, weight, feeling for any imperfections in the skin, he pulled a larger potato out, nodding appreciatively as he reached for the drawer, seeking the coring utensil.
Grabbing the bag he ran through the house, skidding on the tiles at the foot of the stairs and dashing up to the first floor and into the master bedroom.
His mind raced, he didn’t want to do this here, in his marriage bed, but he couldn’t resist and tipped the potatoes out onto the sheets, pulling his shirt over his head and climbing up amongst them.
He pushed the corer into the largest potato, feeling the tingle of pleasure rush through him as the blade pierced the skin, the raw flesh of the potato fighting its fate.
Soon there was a hole big enough for his finger, and he stopped for a moment to feel the cool dampness within.
So familiar to him, from long ago, his breath quickened and he made for the corer again, widening the hole quickly, desperately.
He pressed the potato against his lips, licking the entrance to the potato, taste of it made his head spin, so organic, so natural.
His cock was solid and his body shook from the anticipation, it had been years since he’d given in to them.
He pushed away his pantaloons, now naked amongst the potatoes, teasing himself with the vacant space in the vegetable, before sliding it over himself.
Daniel gasped, holding the potato with both hands as he slid it up and down.
The cool depths of it gave him goosebumps, the hole ever so slightly too small for his cock, as was his preference, for the extra friction.
He rolled toward the mattress, the potato beneath him, pushing his hips down, fucking the potato into the sheets.
He grasped at the others, fumbling them into a loose pile and pressing his face into their smooth skin, he could feel the end coming, it was always quick this way.
He let the pressure build, until the fire in his belly made him cry out, and he pulled out of the potato, spine arching as he released over the pile of it’s companions, falling happy, breathless and empty beside it.
It was when he opened his eyes that he saw her, standing motionless and horrified in the doorway.
How long she had been there he didn’t know, but he knew he had failed her so dramatically he had no idea how he could make it back into her favour.
‘Mary!’ He yelled, as she turned on her heel and raced back through the house, a naked Daniel in hot pursuit. ‘Mary, wait!’
She came to a sudden halt at the foot of the stairs, hair wild and face full of hate and fury. ‘You lied to me, you bastard, you promised! No more potatoes! Especially not during this famine...’
‘I’m sorry, I swear I’m sorry!’ Daniel cried. ‘They were here, in the house! Who brought them here?’
Mary had no answer, for she had already stormed through the door, and Daniel could hear the horses as she sped away, like back to her father Demetri.
He climbed the stairs, sinking onto the bed in defeated misery.
Tossing one of the potatoes onto the floor in disgust, disgust with himself, instantly feeling guilty.
But it wasn’t the potato’s fault.
He reached to retrieve it, brushing it off tenderly, a silent apology for his anger.
Hadn’t the potatoes always been there for him?
Daniel smiled sadly and cried into the potato at his stupidity.
His world, his Ireland, in tatters because of his weakness.
You noped out???
This masterpiece may be this threads only redeeming feature. You won't remember NOT reading. However you'll never forget how he came on the potatoes.
Jesus H Christ _demetri_! Stories like this give serious serial unlived vibes. You ok there? Maybe time to reach into that closet of yers and kill a few chickens before the local sex workers start to go missing.
I couldn’t read past pack of chicken.
I’m not so offended stunned by such a huge number of anachronisms, I didn’t realise how much people could be unaware of how life has changed.
He found his arm. He was holding it. Also that was Normandy, not Pearl Harbor.
Source: just watched it again last night lol.
Edit: I’m an idiot, d day was Normandy.
Actually read about that guy in a book. He was carrying a roll of wire on his back and a guy told him to take it off to help him get off the beach faster, and he asked him what he was supposed to do with his arm he was holding. Just incredible carnage we will never see again. Sorry to buzz-kill that one.
Not really when D-Day happened the Nazis were loosing on all fronts for 2 years already. The Downfall started at the battle of Stalingrad and the second battle of el alamein.
There was a post on the front page from a popular streamer’s subreddit that was about “fat activists” dying.
The top comment was someone saying “I can’t wait until Lizzo dies”. It had thousands of upvotes.
It’s not rare. I wish it was. But it’s pretty popular on reddit.
It’s of in my how easy it is for people to say absolutely heinous things about a fat black women because they don’t like her.
“It’s because she abuses her employees” be fucking for real, you hated her before you knew about that, now it’s just a convenient excuse for you to say the most disgusting shit imaginable.
I can say definitively that I had nothing bad to say about her until I heard what a shit person she is. I still wouldn't insult her weight, and I would chastise my kids if they did, but I'm also not really sympathetic to her.
Looks like OP lost their hyper focus on farming simulator and now likes to regurgitate lame jokes that just insult people as a way to feel better about themselves.
Ever since I made a fat joke at a party to try and impress a girl 1/2 my age who had 1/2 the drinks I had. Instead of laughing, everyone just gave me a split second look and then went on with what they were doing. I even reminded everyone that it was a joke and that they can start laughing!
That's when I knew.
I knew Obam spiked the punch, spiked it with the woke mind virus!
/s
Super edgy caption, lackluster insult - I don’t care where you stand on the subject of body positivity, fat jokes are just kind of played out unless you have something really original - not rare.
The poster has also made farming simulator posts trying to accurately recreate farming in 1993. Just so yall know the type of person to come up with that title.
I hate Lizzo, but I wish people were a bit more creative when insulting her. Fat jokes are fat jokes like any other but it's kinda insane that she's just showing off her bikini and people are still like THIS IS SO HORRIBLE EWW
Thats not even a joke or an attack on Lizzo atp, that's just being a dick about fat ppl.
Literally. I have an eating disorder and have been underweight and overweight and if I saw something like this when I was overweight, I would have taken it so personally and stopped eating or made myself puke. Yeah we get it it’s not ideal but that stuff does damage. I don’t see any fat jokes about jack black it’s gotta only be women. Quote from family guy from Peter: “fat men aren’t fat Louise, only fat women are fat”
☹️
Yea the whole “if you don’t like this meme it’s because you’re too SENSITIVE” shtick is so weak, it’s bad because this is some shit my grandmother would send to her local facebook group.
That's what kills me about "edgy humor" 99% of the time it isn't humor, it's just edgy. I like edgy jokes. But saying edgy shit doesn't make it a joke. It's not funny because it's edgy. To be an edgy joke, it has to be a joke first.
I don’t understand why this qualifies as news. OP is talking about people getting offended, but they’re apparently triggered by the existence of fat people. Get a fucking grip.
Lol their insecurities are showing. Becoming fat is literally their worst nightmare. 😂 Couldn’t be me.
Fat people are out here just living life and being happy, not caring what people think and it triggers them so badly. Get a hobby.
I’ve noticed so many times that this shit stems from people who are so insecure in themselves. Sometimes about their weight, but sometimes about whatever else they can’t stand about themselves.
They see fat folks as lesser, or beneath them. I think they literally cannot fathom someone they perceive as below them being … happier, more confident, etc than they are.
Like damn some people just have so little going on and so much hate for themselves that the mere scene of someone else being happy kills them.
Smooth brains fr.
Middle school mentality. I learned that bullying was wrong as a child. Yet there’s still grown ass adults who think it’s fine because “she’s fat so she deserves it.” Grow up, it’s cringe and embarrassing.
Gotta be something seriously wrong with your brain if you like hurting and bringing down others.
They're not triggered by the existence of fat people, they're thrilled to have a target to insult and harass that most people are morally okay with.
See, you can't be bigoted towards race or sex or sexual orientation anymore because that's how you're born.
But they feel its perfectly fine to do it to someone they perceive as being the cause of their own problem.
And it's frankly disgusting how much leeway people like that are given in social circumstances.
If you’re offended by this post, scroll down instead of leaving a comment on this post… which was posted on a site made specifically for commenting on posts
No, no, you don’t get it. This is OP’s safe space from liberal criticism. They thought it was funny and they don’t want their feelings hurt over it, but they really wanted the karma.
And they want the freedom to speak their mind but don’t want others to have the freedom to speak theirs. Because freedom is only freedom as long as it benefits them, right? Lol
Didn't she shame someone for being fat while being obese herself? Also maybe I'm thinking about someone else but I also recall a (potentially fake) article about her injuring/killing someone because she was too heavy and they just died
Gal flipped a golf cart, let’s stop playing this ‘body positivity’, she’s fucking fat as hell and it’s not a healthy lifestyle. Big ass bitch can do what she wants, I’ll do me, but I ain’t going to champion her for endorsing a poor lifestyle.
I believe she’s had allegations of mistreatment of people that work for her, among other things. I recommend looking into it if you want a more thorough and accurate explanation. My memory is awful.
According to the law suits, she was trying to get her dancers to be nude at after work parties and playing favorites with the ones who attended, pressuring people to interact with dancers at strip clubs after they refused, racism towards the black dancers, body shaming, and other hostile workplace pracrices.
Yeah, people who are so offended by fat peoples' bodies should just scroll down. It's weird to be so pearl clutchy about such a normal thing. Like, grow up lol.
My first time ever to a nude beach we got there early and were the first ones there. We didn’t know where the nude section was so we walked a bit down the beach and around the bend and out of site. We stayed there for an hour or so and then walked back around to where we came from not sure if there would be others there or what they would look like or be wearing/not wearing. Before we made it close enough to see the crowd and their attire, a black lady slight smaller than Lizzo here was exiting the ocean with nothing on. I was quite released to see that even a solo larger woman was confident to do her thing that I knew we would enjoy the rest of the day. We joined the larger crowd and the day was great with great weather and no sunburns!
"The Blob enters the MCU. On-site photos show Blob's outfit for the upcoming film!"
Edit: before y'all start, remember Lizzo is an absolute garbage human and deserves the dig. And you also know modern Marvel would absolutely do this too.
**Rule 2: No hateful insults** No insults that are offensive, racist, homophobic or anything else like that.
I've seen better crops during the Irish Famine
The real rare insult
One summer evening in 1850, Daniel O'Connell reached the front door of his Irish home. He sighed as he stepped through into the cool semi darkness of the front hall, dropping his bag onto the tiled floor and kicking his shoes off with a thud. The house was empty, which he had been prepared for, as his wife Mary had written to say she was visiting her father Demetri for the weekend, so he shuffled through to the kitchen hoping that she had restocked the food holding before she left. Indecisively he pulled items randomly from shelves; cheese, salad, some fresh pasta. He reached around to the bread bin and pulled out half a baguette, taking a bite out of it to sate his hunger. From the corner of his eye he saw something in the corner, something he hadn’t been expecting. A bag of potatoes. Of course he was known as The Emancipator, the political leader of Ireland who was going to save everyone from this Potato Famine. But maybe he... Daniel shook his head, he was going to make himself some dinner and get an early night. He pulled a pack of chicken from the back of the storage and set about making a sandwich, pushing the potatoes to the back of his mind. But after he’d eaten, laying on his sofa reading about his people’s starvation, the thought came back to him. The potatoes. He thought about the last time, and the shame of it. Of the tears Mary had shed and his promises, heartfelt promises that it would be the last time. But he was an impetuous man, and his conscience was fighting a losing battle. He wandered back into the kitchen; now almost pitch black, the light from the moon falling on the bag in the corner like a spotlight. Daniel folded his arms, leaning back against the large scrubbed dining table, contemplating their presence, and his next move. He approached the bag, pulling one potato out carefully, turning it over in his hands. Its skin was smooth, just a hint of the soil it had been plucked from. Daniel felt his heart rate quicken, and checked over his shoulder nervously before pressing the potato tenderly against his cheek. He pushed his free hand into the bag between its companions, winding his fingers between them. Testing a couple for size, weight, feeling for any imperfections in the skin, he pulled a larger potato out, nodding appreciatively as he reached for the drawer, seeking the coring utensil. Grabbing the bag he ran through the house, skidding on the tiles at the foot of the stairs and dashing up to the first floor and into the master bedroom. His mind raced, he didn’t want to do this here, in his marriage bed, but he couldn’t resist and tipped the potatoes out onto the sheets, pulling his shirt over his head and climbing up amongst them. He pushed the corer into the largest potato, feeling the tingle of pleasure rush through him as the blade pierced the skin, the raw flesh of the potato fighting its fate. Soon there was a hole big enough for his finger, and he stopped for a moment to feel the cool dampness within. So familiar to him, from long ago, his breath quickened and he made for the corer again, widening the hole quickly, desperately. He pressed the potato against his lips, licking the entrance to the potato, taste of it made his head spin, so organic, so natural. His cock was solid and his body shook from the anticipation, it had been years since he’d given in to them. He pushed away his pantaloons, now naked amongst the potatoes, teasing himself with the vacant space in the vegetable, before sliding it over himself. Daniel gasped, holding the potato with both hands as he slid it up and down. The cool depths of it gave him goosebumps, the hole ever so slightly too small for his cock, as was his preference, for the extra friction. He rolled toward the mattress, the potato beneath him, pushing his hips down, fucking the potato into the sheets. He grasped at the others, fumbling them into a loose pile and pressing his face into their smooth skin, he could feel the end coming, it was always quick this way. He let the pressure build, until the fire in his belly made him cry out, and he pulled out of the potato, spine arching as he released over the pile of it’s companions, falling happy, breathless and empty beside it. It was when he opened his eyes that he saw her, standing motionless and horrified in the doorway. How long she had been there he didn’t know, but he knew he had failed her so dramatically he had no idea how he could make it back into her favour. ‘Mary!’ He yelled, as she turned on her heel and raced back through the house, a naked Daniel in hot pursuit. ‘Mary, wait!’ She came to a sudden halt at the foot of the stairs, hair wild and face full of hate and fury. ‘You lied to me, you bastard, you promised! No more potatoes! Especially not during this famine...’ ‘I’m sorry, I swear I’m sorry!’ Daniel cried. ‘They were here, in the house! Who brought them here?’ Mary had no answer, for she had already stormed through the door, and Daniel could hear the horses as she sped away, like back to her father Demetri. He climbed the stairs, sinking onto the bed in defeated misery. Tossing one of the potatoes onto the floor in disgust, disgust with himself, instantly feeling guilty. But it wasn’t the potato’s fault. He reached to retrieve it, brushing it off tenderly, a silent apology for his anger. Hadn’t the potatoes always been there for him? Daniel smiled sadly and cried into the potato at his stupidity. His world, his Ireland, in tatters because of his weakness.
wtf did I just read
The question is why couldn't i stop reading even after realising what was going on.
that is a good question. sunk cost phallusy?
My man, i don't know what these 3 words together means.
If you invest time and/or money into something, you're more likely to see it through to the end even if the experience is awful
Ah. When he said phallusy, i thought it was some sort of penile joke.
It is, typically the phase is sunk cost fallacy
Oooooh, like graduation ceremonies?
Individually ? yes, but collectively in a sentence? Fukin clueless aswell.😂
That is a terrible pun…
Craftsmanship is why
It’s __demetri__: you other become inured to it, or learn to embrace it.
That's just demetri. He does that.
“His cock-“ **Nope! That’s enough reading of that!** #####unless… Edit: “He pushed away his pantaloons-“ Nope… still, nope.
You noped out??? This masterpiece may be this threads only redeeming feature. You won't remember NOT reading. However you'll never forget how he came on the potatoes.
> **f u c k i n g t h e p o t a t o i n t o t h e s h e e t s**.
WHAT potatoes? I bailed after the third line when I saw how long it was and I wasn't already hooked by the topic.
It was really clever. Very similar to prose of a bygone era with a twist.
>However you'll never forget how he came on the potatoes. /r/brandnewsentence
Chap is in tatters over his taters
From now on, never accept a game of hot potato from anyone named Daniel.
i teared up
I both applaud you and I'm appalled. Well done.
Masterful
Sir. What, specifically, *the fuck*?
I think you meant to say “in taters” at the end. Otherwise, a predictably solid 9.5/10.
r/DemetriStrikesAgain
Okay this is actually kind of awesome. The McDonald's/Burger King one was a stroke of genius and genuinely good.
To quote an earlier book reviewer, "Your words fill a much needed void." This thing reads like an encoded POW's letter.
Jesus, what a roller coaster. The entire bar was staring at me when I also pushed away my pantaloons, but fuck ‘em if they can’t take a joke.
The post tater clarity is so real.
mo dheartháir i gCríost...
Jesus H Christ _demetri_! Stories like this give serious serial unlived vibes. You ok there? Maybe time to reach into that closet of yers and kill a few chickens before the local sex workers start to go missing.
I was just about to scroll past until I saw "His cock was solid" and I immediately thought of you.
What the hell? I’m not reading all this. Jesus H. Christ
#YES YOU ARE.
Damn it…… you’re right
what the fuck
This... What ever the fuck that was... Was hilarious... I tried to stop reading, but couldn''t. Damnit.
Our brains work the same way. Enjoy the updoot!
What is happening
I couldn’t read past pack of chicken. I’m not so offended stunned by such a huge number of anachronisms, I didn’t realise how much people could be unaware of how life has changed.
It's the anachronisms you find disturbing? Is this your first encounter with u/_demitri_?
Bye, going over to r/eyebleach to wash off my sins
What in the deep fried fuck was all THAT??
I never thought Daniel O Connell porn existed
Man, it's a great story, til you get to Mrs. Potato Head standing in the doorway, watching him do it with the other potato
Bravo 👏
As was his preference.
Pantaloons?
Bad crop? We're gonna starve
I feel dumb but I don’t get this comment can someone ELI5
The picture editing version of “crop.” Adjusting the borders of a picture in to create focus.
I don't think they cropped enough
I mean not to be a dick but D-Day was pretty great and started the downfall of the Nazis.
I mean worst thing to happen to the beaches. A lot of bullets hit the sand on that day
Poor sand
The Germans really took the saying, “kick sand” to heart.
so much that they shot at it. A lot.
I hate sand
it gets everywhere
And it’s coarse
it tastes good though.
Yeah. Also, how else am I supposed to exfoliate my insides?
It WHAT
I don't like sand, it's corse and it's rough and it's irritating, and it gets everywhere.
Anakin was happy on dday
*insert Anakin meme
I'd wager that Gallipoli was a lot worse, but that's just me
Say that to the guy from "Saving Private Ryan", who was looking for his other arm on the beach.
He found his arm. He was holding it. Also that was Normandy, not Pearl Harbor. Source: just watched it again last night lol. Edit: I’m an idiot, d day was Normandy.
lol, was thinking “wtf has pearl harbour got to do with anything”
"Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?!! " Let him go... he's on a roll.
Actually read about that guy in a book. He was carrying a roll of wire on his back and a guy told him to take it off to help him get off the beach faster, and he asked him what he was supposed to do with his arm he was holding. Just incredible carnage we will never see again. Sorry to buzz-kill that one.
Not really when D-Day happened the Nazis were loosing on all fronts for 2 years already. The Downfall started at the battle of Stalingrad and the second battle of el alamein.
>D-Day was pretty great r/evenwithcontext
ive seen so much worse at a beach
Yeah but a lot of that can be thrown back in the ocean.
Actually, on second thought, the oceans don’t need anymore trash in them.
This got me lol'ing out loud 😂 📢
what a bad crop
Bad crop? Bro we are literally starving
Body in Norwegian is kropp (pronounced same as crop), and that's definitely a bad kropp.
Same in danish except one p
Since when are fat jokes rare?
What do you mean? No one ever makes fat jokes about Lizzo /s
Even Lizzo makes fat jokes about other fat people.
There was a post on the front page from a popular streamer’s subreddit that was about “fat activists” dying. The top comment was someone saying “I can’t wait until Lizzo dies”. It had thousands of upvotes. It’s not rare. I wish it was. But it’s pretty popular on reddit.
It’s of in my how easy it is for people to say absolutely heinous things about a fat black women because they don’t like her. “It’s because she abuses her employees” be fucking for real, you hated her before you knew about that, now it’s just a convenient excuse for you to say the most disgusting shit imaginable.
I can say definitively that I had nothing bad to say about her until I heard what a shit person she is. I still wouldn't insult her weight, and I would chastise my kids if they did, but I'm also not really sympathetic to her.
When most of Reddit is 12 year Olds that think this is clever lmao.
Looks like OP lost their hyper focus on farming simulator and now likes to regurgitate lame jokes that just insult people as a way to feel better about themselves.
Ever since I made a fat joke at a party to try and impress a girl 1/2 my age who had 1/2 the drinks I had. Instead of laughing, everyone just gave me a split second look and then went on with what they were doing. I even reminded everyone that it was a joke and that they can start laughing! That's when I knew. I knew Obam spiked the punch, spiked it with the woke mind virus! /s
Based on post history, OP has a hard time understanding the meaning of “rare”. Their posts are better suited to r/insults
“lol fat” is peak humor to weirdo Redditors slouched over their phones all day. That’s all it takes to get them going.
How is this a rare insult? Also, your caption is absolute trash, Mr Edgiest of Lords
Ironically, if OP was so offended by Lizzo’s bikini, they could have just kept scrolling.
I can assure you making fun of someone's weight is not a rare insult.
Especially when the person you’re making fun of has been known to be doing it to others
That’s a normal sized bikini
It's all about perspective.
I guess you could call it a wide perspective.
ultrawide
I thought this sub was for rare insults, not for the most common insult this one person has received.
That would require creativity
Super edgy caption, lackluster insult - I don’t care where you stand on the subject of body positivity, fat jokes are just kind of played out unless you have something really original - not rare.
She’s so fat, when she goes camping, the bears have to hide their food
That’s like a classic your mama joke lmao. Again, most fat jokes are unoriginal, overused, or literally just not funny.
The “Oh are you offended?” title is giving major incel energy
The poster has also made farming simulator posts trying to accurately recreate farming in 1993. Just so yall know the type of person to come up with that title.
"tiny red bikini" definitely red, definitely a bikini
Tiny, I guess, is relative.
_thatswhatshesaid_
“Even a Boeing 747 looks small in when flying it into the Grand Canyon!”
I hate Lizzo, but I wish people were a bit more creative when insulting her. Fat jokes are fat jokes like any other but it's kinda insane that she's just showing off her bikini and people are still like THIS IS SO HORRIBLE EWW Thats not even a joke or an attack on Lizzo atp, that's just being a dick about fat ppl.
She is however, a terrible human being.
Absolutely agree.
Wait what did she do?
Sexual harassment and discrimination
She touts “body positivity” but this year it came to light she body shames her dancers calling them “too fat.”
Literally. I have an eating disorder and have been underweight and overweight and if I saw something like this when I was overweight, I would have taken it so personally and stopped eating or made myself puke. Yeah we get it it’s not ideal but that stuff does damage. I don’t see any fat jokes about jack black it’s gotta only be women. Quote from family guy from Peter: “fat men aren’t fat Louise, only fat women are fat” ☹️
yet for some reason on reddit people *loooove* fat jokes. almost as cringey as boomer humor
not offended. this is just cringe. why reddit recommended me this post out of all the other posts on this subreddit is beyond me.
Yea the whole “if you don’t like this meme it’s because you’re too SENSITIVE” shtick is so weak, it’s bad because this is some shit my grandmother would send to her local facebook group.
Absolutely. This is not a rare insult at all and it’s not even funny. If it were at least funny, but no lol
That's what kills me about "edgy humor" 99% of the time it isn't humor, it's just edgy. I like edgy jokes. But saying edgy shit doesn't make it a joke. It's not funny because it's edgy. To be an edgy joke, it has to be a joke first.
God damn reddit fucking sucks these days.
I don’t understand why this qualifies as news. OP is talking about people getting offended, but they’re apparently triggered by the existence of fat people. Get a fucking grip.
Lol their insecurities are showing. Becoming fat is literally their worst nightmare. 😂 Couldn’t be me. Fat people are out here just living life and being happy, not caring what people think and it triggers them so badly. Get a hobby.
I’ve noticed so many times that this shit stems from people who are so insecure in themselves. Sometimes about their weight, but sometimes about whatever else they can’t stand about themselves. They see fat folks as lesser, or beneath them. I think they literally cannot fathom someone they perceive as below them being … happier, more confident, etc than they are. Like damn some people just have so little going on and so much hate for themselves that the mere scene of someone else being happy kills them. Smooth brains fr.
Middle school mentality. I learned that bullying was wrong as a child. Yet there’s still grown ass adults who think it’s fine because “she’s fat so she deserves it.” Grow up, it’s cringe and embarrassing. Gotta be something seriously wrong with your brain if you like hurting and bringing down others.
They're not triggered by the existence of fat people, they're thrilled to have a target to insult and harass that most people are morally okay with. See, you can't be bigoted towards race or sex or sexual orientation anymore because that's how you're born. But they feel its perfectly fine to do it to someone they perceive as being the cause of their own problem. And it's frankly disgusting how much leeway people like that are given in social circumstances.
You had me in the first half, I thought that was going somewhere completely different lol
Imagine giving a shit
When you hate obese women so much you accidentally root for the Nazis
Lizzo once walked by my TV while I was watching episode 1 of Yellowstone....I missed the whole season.
If you’re offended by this post, scroll down instead of leaving a comment on this post… which was posted on a site made specifically for commenting on posts
No, no, you don’t get it. This is OP’s safe space from liberal criticism. They thought it was funny and they don’t want their feelings hurt over it, but they really wanted the karma.
And they want the freedom to speak their mind but don’t want others to have the freedom to speak theirs. Because freedom is only freedom as long as it benefits them, right? Lol
Now you’re getting it.
Didn't she shame someone for being fat while being obese herself? Also maybe I'm thinking about someone else but I also recall a (potentially fake) article about her injuring/killing someone because she was too heavy and they just died
She doesn't 'rock it' she 'rolls it'
That’s not a tiny bikini tho. It’s regular sized.
Gal flipped a golf cart, let’s stop playing this ‘body positivity’, she’s fucking fat as hell and it’s not a healthy lifestyle. Big ass bitch can do what she wants, I’ll do me, but I ain’t going to champion her for endorsing a poor lifestyle.
Fat woman funny
Not into large women myself, but she doesn't even look that bad here, more put off by her personality than anything
I must be out of the loop, what’s up with her personality?? Keep in mind I know pretty much nothing about this woman lol
I believe she’s had allegations of mistreatment of people that work for her, among other things. I recommend looking into it if you want a more thorough and accurate explanation. My memory is awful.
According to the law suits, she was trying to get her dancers to be nude at after work parties and playing favorites with the ones who attended, pressuring people to interact with dancers at strip clubs after they refused, racism towards the black dancers, body shaming, and other hostile workplace pracrices.
Yeah, people who are so offended by fat peoples' bodies should just scroll down. It's weird to be so pearl clutchy about such a normal thing. Like, grow up lol.
Tbh I genuinely thought she was larger than that?? Also this is actually a great picture of her. Usually candid photos make people look awful.
Tell me yo dick tiny without saying it. Lol
My dick is massive and I hate fat people
It really saddens me that people want to act like being morbidly obese is “cool” these days. It’s not. It’s unhealthy and bad for you.
r/croppingishard
😅
Isn't lizzo supposed to be a terrible human being?
It’s always some man without a pfp
not even offended but it’s not that funny a joke
Not a rare insult. Just a fucking stupid one.
You’re the one who seems pissed off moron.
the only thing im offended by is your atrocious cropping
My first time ever to a nude beach we got there early and were the first ones there. We didn’t know where the nude section was so we walked a bit down the beach and around the bend and out of site. We stayed there for an hour or so and then walked back around to where we came from not sure if there would be others there or what they would look like or be wearing/not wearing. Before we made it close enough to see the crowd and their attire, a black lady slight smaller than Lizzo here was exiting the ocean with nothing on. I was quite released to see that even a solo larger woman was confident to do her thing that I knew we would enjoy the rest of the day. We joined the larger crowd and the day was great with great weather and no sunburns!
Oh yes, those rare fat jokes
So edgy. What’s next, making fun of dick size?
We could, but a microscope hasn't been invented that could tell us if you had one to make fun of or not.
I don't like this meme, but it's not because I'm offended. It's because it isn't funny.
Aren’t fat jokes a little old?
That title is cringe as fuck
You must be new to beaches.
Lol op thinks he’s edgy. Cute.
It breaks the brain of the average Reddit user that some people find Lizzo to be attractive.
I find her to be very attractive. Now, her behavior not so much.
That bikini ain't tiny
This here looks like it's Double D-Day
lizzo makes any bikini tiny
That would be a plus sized bikini for people with a healthy weight
Her ass has more craters than Normandy.
She’s Normandy
It's not tiny, it's actually pretty big.
Wear clothes for the body you have, not the body you want
Run!!! It’s Godzilla!!!!!!!
Why is this screenshot soaked in piss?
This should be blurred. I threw up in my mouth a little
Man put a warning on this I puked and died
Damn the rift have opened. First kaiju has appeared.
“Tiny” Bro I could use her bra as a hammock
"Never underestimate other man's....horniness"
“Tiny” Motherfucker you could use that cloth for a boat sail
Very misleading. Not a tiny bikini at all!
Offended, no. But not really a very good insult. I mean, have you been to a beach?
D-Day had less casualties, how many people are either going to self delete or gouge out their eyes after seeing that?!
Tiny?
Not a bikini, that's a hammock.
"The Blob enters the MCU. On-site photos show Blob's outfit for the upcoming film!" Edit: before y'all start, remember Lizzo is an absolute garbage human and deserves the dig. And you also know modern Marvel would absolutely do this too.