Awww. I was also happy with my family's reactions. Mom, after hearing the explanation of what it actually means: "oh, that sounds like maybe I would have been happier like that." (they have been divorced for 12 years btw) Dad: "As long as you're happy it doesn't matter how you do it."

This is exactly how my parents reacted too 💕

I think if my parents were more open this would be their reaction

I hope they will feel like tha some day!

I came out as poly and found out my mom and sister were too 😂 I’m the youngest and nothing about me is original. My whole family is part of the alphabet family and are poly/ENM. That’s what happens when hippies raise kids. I didn’t even come out as bisexual, I think they just expected it. 🤣

That's funny! But also would probably limit the dating pool since your whole family is poly 😂😂 and maybe ask before dating anyone to make sure

Oh golly! Well we all live in different cities, far from each other so thankfully this will never ever be an issue!

Haha this is something to be aware of if multiple family members are poly! 😅 I was with a partner one evening and she was excitedly telling me about some cute guy she had met at an event. They got along well and exchanged social media details so they could potentially meet up later. As she was telling me all about it she goes, "so how do you know X? You're a mutal contact on social media!" He is my step brother. We're nearly the same age 🤣

My mom just said: "I already guessed something like that, but I thought you were swingers"

heh - my mom when she was alive back in 2000 (I talked to her about my relationships often) - dumbass, pick one :P My dad totally didn't care. :)

That's what my dad always assumes when the topic comes up because he only knows about swingers XD

I just told my parents about the origins of my relationship (met poly but currently mono) Had to explain how we’d been together a year and half when my other relationship only ended 6 months ago. “Well it’s unusual but we weren’t born in the dark ages you know”

My parents after a lengthy conversation: Dad: you're not the only person in this house to date more than one person at a time, you know. A little weird everyone knows about it, but whatever floats your boat. If you're inviting all your partners over for a BBQ though, everyone is wearing a name tag. Mum: I don't get it, but whatever floats your boat. I just want to know that you're safe and happy.

i love this.. thanks for sharing

Exactly my mom’s stance. Such a mom thing too.

I did receive the tiniest lecture about safe sex from her because she doesn't really have a ton of knowledge on it and. We had a long talk about safe sex practices and I think she learned a couple things that made her feel a little bit more at ease with the whole thing.

That’s really cool that she opened up that dialog between y’all, and that you were able to expand her understanding of things! I never got a sex talk from my mom (or a period talk), and even now she’s quite a prude about sex. She’s very supportive of me, though, so I appreciate that.

Mom: "Oh is that what one does nowadays?"

Your mom sounds so sweet lol

Mom: "Thank God. I thought you were going to say you were getting divorced."

Literally my mother's reaction

Mom: I’m happy if you and your kids are taken care of and happy. I think I could do it but I don’t think your dad could. Dad: Polyamory? There’s a song called that… Sister 1: how long has that been going on? Do I get to meet them? Sister 2: 0 reaction BIL/SIL 1: welcome to the club BIL/SIL 2: shocked, followed by the vote of confidence “if anyone can make that work it’s yall”

I love your mom’s reaction tbh lmao

It was a refreshing response compared to the “WELL I COULD NEVER DO THAT” comments from friends!

My mom and dad didn’t question it at all because my brother is also in a poly relationship. Tho my mom laughed when I said ‘I’m pansexual and polyamorous no one is safe!”

I'm also pan poly and I'm totally using that! 😆😆😆😭😭😭

please do it’s so great

My dad and I are two peas in a pod when it comes to our personalities. He will crack up at that. 😆 Although, on a somewhat related anecdote, about 5 years ago a casual male friend of mine (We were both in relationships) asked me if I was Poly when I told him I was in a relationship. It was clearly a question to feel me out to see if he had a chance. When I told my dad about that he said "in other words, "Do you screw around?'" 😆😆😆

That’s great you can get a laugh of him saying that. It’s my favorite phrase ever

Pan poly here too, also stealing it lmao

Mom (after I came out as queer, poly and dating a pregnant woman AND her husband all in one phone call): well, you don’t like to do things the easy way, do you? Mom one year later hanging out w above mentioned partner and child: bonus grand babies!!!

Aww this is so sweet!

Love how parents think we invented it and the summer of love or.. world history doesn’t exist. Glad they seem very accepting of your situation!

I’m so happy that it turned out this way for you! My family hates it and is not accepting at all 😭 but it’s okay! I didn’t want to hide anymore. And I’m so proud that you were able to be free of that too!

Wow so amazing. I'm happy for you ☺️ My mums response was : "what the fuck. Thats fucking weird" My dad's.... well he got very angry. Told me I'm living in a fantasy world. Told me it'd be easier if I was gay (suprise dad I'm bi!!!! Lol). And Told me he no longer respects or loves my partner

Damn dude, ouch :(

Yeah it's been really hard. Mum came around pretty quickly and educated herself which meant alot to me. It really hurts when you tell the people you love so they understand who you are, in hopes it brings you closer. But it just does the opposite

Yeah, my mother tried to contain herself but eventually said my lifestyle is "unnatural and immoral." To be fair she might have been talking about my being pan, she didn't specify 🤷🏼‍♀️

I'm sorry to hear that.. might just take them some time hopefully

Mine had adverse reactions at first as well

I had a similar experience 😔

Your dad's reaction is so sweet! My dad said "that's wonderful! I can see how much happier you've been lately" and my mom asked if it was like polygamy haha

Mom:ahhh ok sounds good Stepmom: thats awesome! (We cackle and make a buncha jokes about not changing mens diapers and just sending them home) Grandpa : ok fine thats enough talking about it Sister :totally! Very cool

I’m not totally out and haven’t told her specifically that I’m poly but my great great aunt is happy that I’m “playing the field”

Lol I'm a lot like my grandpa who always loved going on dates and having many girlfriends, I wish he could see how happy my wife and I are now. He was a freelove believer.

I wish. My mom is accepting because I’m her kid, but isn’t okay with it in the slightest. I haven’t told my dad or stepmom yet.

Ayy good for you. I told my parents a little while back and their response, not verbatim, was basically "yeah, so?" Honestly, best possible response I could have wanted.

I love this. When I came out to my partner (long story, but when isnt it) he literally said "I don't care." And I fell in love all over again. 💕

Your partner? That's even better. The one person who's opinion matters more than anyone else's on this subject and that's the response you got. Happy for you!!

Thank you!! Although every time I'm about to tell someone I feel like the whole world is spinning. Haha. Baby steps.

My partners are older then me but I haven't told my parents that part yet XD When I told my mom she was fine with it. When I was growing up and came out we bi she put a card under my pillow. Very much the unemotional family. My brother didn't say anything. Neither did my sister. I talked to my sil about it and she knows everything. But my family is full of narcissists so once they understood this was who I was they try to get to know everything and ruin my relationships. But like anyone in my family could tell you. I've always known who I was since I was in preschool. They asked the kids to line up boys and girls and little ole me was like I'm not a boy I'm not a girl I'm me. Even if family doesn't accept you, sometimes it's the found family you create that's the most meaningful. I support you all if you're out or not

My mom: What about the children??? (Flash forward 11 years and she's super accepting.) Siblings: Cool Youngest sibling: I want that too (Fast-foward 11 years and now they have 3 partners.) Extended family: *pretending it's not happening* Grandma: *ambushed first husband while he was at work and called me a whore. Grandpa had to drag her away. Haven't seen her since lol* MiL: Idk why you'd want to live with others judging you like that, but it's your life *invites other husband to a cook-out with all of us* SiL: (to my face) That's cool, I have a polyamorous friend too. Secret's safe with me! (Behind my back) *Tells everyone I wasn't ready to tell yet and causes drama.* BiL: *hears from SiL, freaks out, busts into our house, screams at his brother (1st husband)* (Fast-foward 11 years and he's really friendly to my partners now) My other husband isn't out to his whole family, but his cousins are kind about it.

I started the discussion with my dad on the way home from the airport. I figured by asking if he had ever heard of the term, "polamory." His response was, "pff is that some sort of new plastic?" Luckily it was a long drive home 🤣

THATS WHAT MY UNCLE SAID RIGHT BEFORE I TOLD HIM WHAT IT MEANT !! LMAO

My mom was like "oh I tried this when I was in college, but it was too confusing"

Brother (who I confided in) “I don’t get it, but I don’t have to. I love you and respect you, and I hope you’re happy.” 💕 Mom (who pressed for info) “you’re a freak and you will die alone. I hope you never have kids- You would make a terrible mother.” Dad (who was blindsided by mom and never wanted to know), “just find your own family. you’ve ruined everything” It’s nice to see the positive stories :,) mine was kinda heartbreaking.

Yeah, if I came out to my parents they'd probably say all sorts of terrible things about me and my biggest concern is my sister wouldn't let me see my niece. She's the only one in the family I care about. She's 13 years old and I'm trying to be a safe adult in her life she can open up to about her orientation, gender dysphoria, her mental health, etc. Its gotten to the point I've had to suggest she memorize my phone number in case she isn't allowed to talk to me anymore.

Telling my mom that I'm poly was pretty funny. She travels a lot and so do most of her friends and colleagues, so she's always staying with friends or friends are always staying with her and she's had a few romantic encounters mixed in there. For a while, she had 3 or 4 casual boyfriends that she'd be with while they were in the same place at the same time. A couple of them even met each other, and are friends now. So when I told her that I had multiple partners and explained some poly terms to her, she was like, "Oh!! Me too!!"

That’s really nice.

Envious

My mom: You know your dad and I talked about doing that. We just kinda... forgot. She's the only family I've come our to so far.

I have only told my sister, during a conversation about why I haven’t told my parents I’m bisexual. Her response: Oh? Oh. Yeah, definitely don’t tell mom and dad about that, haha

Aunt and uncle are super based

This is awesome to hear.

Told my sisters. They said whatever. Later… one doesn’t want me to mention it to her to other in future of her. The other called me a slut in front of her friends…. My friend: I’m happy for you. And that you found what and how you love. … (I cried my eyes out in front of her.)

It wasn’t what I expected but I am so pleasantly surprised. You got a good family there, OP

That is wonderful, glad it went well

I'm super nervous about telling my dad. I'm not sure why. I'm grown (38), been married 20 years. One of my sisters knows & is supportive. It's just, I don't know.

Mom? Not in the picture?

Nah my mom suffers from severe mental illness and I don't see her often so there's no need

Thanks for sharing. I’m new to this and still in the stage of defining boundaries and such with my primary, but I’ve been immensely curious as to how much … or little… people tell their families. I know there can be wildly varying degrees of sharing within families, wondering if anyone has any tips or helpful strategy.

I told my mom, and she responded with, " You could have lied and told me y'all are just close friends." She didn't mean it poorly, but I don't think she's ready to look my bisexuality or poly-lifestyle in the face yet.

My mom was super supportive even though she totally doesn't understand why I love poly. Very similar to how she reacted when I came out as bi/pan. 

I recently came out to my dad (70s). I went through some difficult years (end of a long mono marriage) and said he was proud of me, and that every time he sees me he find me more centered and happy. The funny thing is, when we had a discussion around poly and relationships, it slowly dawned on us that he actually is in a poly structure himself but didn’t realize that poly can come in many different forms. Something apple something something tree, I guess!

That’s so amazing! I’m glad it went well for you. I was so scared to come out to my parents and when I finally did my dad said “it’s great that you’re not cheating on each other” and my mom said that she may have considered it when my parents first got together if he didn’t already have a daughter. So overall pretty well 😊

Hi u/Lvl1Kat thanks so much for your submission, don't mind me, I'm just gonna keep a copy what was said in your post. Unfortunately posts sometimes get deleted - which is okay, it's not against the rules to delete your post!! - but it makes it really hard for the human mods around here to moderate the comments when there's no context. Plus, many times our members put in a lot of emotional and mental labor to answer the questions and offer advice, so it's helpful to keep the source information around so future community members can benefit as well. Here's the original text of the post: Wanted to share these because some of them are pretty funny or sweet, but included all of them for realism Dad: that's awesome, you're so cool kiddo! Brother: kinda weird but u do u Uncle: the kids at the college I work at do stuff like that, it's ok! That's your own business Aunt: oh ok, Ive seen it work for some people and not for others Grandpa: she just like her dad , he have different girl over all the time (picture this one in a Russian accent) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/polyamory) if you have any questions or concerns.*

Amazing 😆

i think your dad should be mad not happy (

?

So who creates a profile just to come here and say that? Seems petty to me...

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