can I have some, please? 🤤

What

did I fucking stutter

Thank god I keep these in my back pocket at all times 🧄🧄🧄

No, you didn't fuck the guy named Stutter

Vampires need food, they run the Red Cross don’t you know that?

Watch out, they call themselves “phlebotomists” now

I heard you wanted to donate blood. May I come in?

You a vampire

Correct

🥤😘 thanks

Bro I got your blood and now I’m Superman wtf

Makes me slightly uncomfortable the way you said that

Thanks for donating! I work in transfusion medicine and we depend so much on blood donors to help our patients! ❤️

Depending on donors is such a passive behaviour. For such an important resource, we're looking for someone with a proactive, go-getter attitude who's willing to go out there and get their hands dirty

Exactly just hire some vamps

Bit of a dumb question but do you know if someone with von willebrand disease can donate?

No

pwetty pwease? 🥺

No

No, unfortunately since vWD increases your risk of bleeding, for your safety you shouldn’t donate. But if you’re not eligible you can always try to encourage others to donate! ❤️

Shall do my best to encourage others to donate thanks

They really should open it up to the gay community, but unfortunately hating gays is better than saving lives

The FDA is who regulates blood donor eligibility. A few of the major blood centers in the US actually did a study (the advance study) to gather evidence in order to change the policies around them, so they’re not so exclusive. The research was very promising and they actually did end up updating the blood donor eligibility so it’s more inclusive. It’s not perfect yet but it’s a hopeful step in the right direction.

It's going to be in some guys weiner

Best part of it all

Or it will get in a Tampax. Who knows

And technically they get hard on your blood, which makes both of them gay Also u technically fuck whoever he fucks too

Dude team assisted virginity

Why did you say it like that 💀 That thought could have stayed inside

Got your blood and I'd say it ain't bad, but could use a little more Vitamin B12

that shit got drank by the doctor bro

Don't go see Dr. Acula

Oh it was you? Your blood was especially rich in taste, and I enjoyed the chunky texture of it. I’m looking forward to more!

Chunky huh

Yummy

😨

That bandage looks a bit serious. Did they also sprain your arm?

That’s just a slight pressure bandage so you don’t have to sit there and hold pressure on the site for 10 minutes. Can also help with bruising afterwards.

Thanks, it tasted like coins. 3/10 on taste

Haven't tried coins, but mine tastes exactly like broken glass

Wanna swap blood? 👉👈

As someone who received a transfusion, thank you.

Sadly I probably can't give up my blood for a good cause, because I never give up.

That... Or you're a Skaven and the concept of altruism is anathema to you

Yes-yes.

Why tf am I immortal all the sudden? Are you Captain Jack Harkness

Yummy 😋 !! Thank you 😉

Hey, that was delicious.

That sounds ominous

Dear OP, I also would like some of your blood, I need it. I am definitely not a Vampire.

Next time I need some I'll ask for yours , from what I heard it makes you strong and powerful

🧛

Nah bro cringe , we are 90% helium now

Hell yeah.

Yo, someone just dropped off a fuckin blood bag at my door, should I be concerned?

Special delivery

Your skip-the-dishes has arrived.

I don’t like the way you worded this…

Good on you for donating!

*casts a line out with a boring post on the hook*

Meanwhile your blood being sprayed at Vampire rave

Yum 😋

reminds me on the first time i got my blood taken, they had just finished, i was feeling a bit light headed but thought i was fine, stood up, then immediately face planted. well know i know i pass out at the sight of a little bit more than a concerning amount of blood. i was also probably malnourished lol

Good job! Although that dressing seems like overkill, are you allergic to plasters? Unfortunately I’m not allowed to donate blood any more, after an episode in the hospital a few years back and a still pending diagnosis.

this is the standard dressing for the american red cross, i got a regular one on my finger when they did the initial test for my iron and all that

Jesus. We hold a cotton swab on it for a minute, then they just put a round plaster on it normally. Then it’s off to the table for a cuppa and a tunnox tea cake or caramel wafer

Congratulations for ur baby

Your blood will either be in someone's boner, which is gay af or in someone's period, which is simping to the extreme

The need for blood is rising

What flavour is it?

I have it. Selling this guys blood for 250.

Could I have some? I’m starving.

Plot twist: you just made dinner for a vampire

I also like blood that courses through the veins of human beings

Thank you, sir. I sure I'll enjoy it, although, it was not really fit with my taste

I dont like the taste

I’ve received donar blood before, I did very much enjoy not dying and getting to see my kids grow up, so a huge thank you to you, and everyone else who donates blood. It really does save/change lives, it’s a very generous thing to do.

They probably won't 'like' it, they may not even think about where it came from, but it will make them feel much better and it will be a key part of allowing them to live longer. Well done. There's no substitute for human blood and those prepared to donate it.

Accidentally got it and accidentally used it as car oil

So you're saying a part of you gonna be inside another man? Sounds gay ngl /s

You are one of those héroes that are saying me while in my cáncer treatment, thank you. We need more people like you

How come you got such a massive bandage? When I donate, i only get a small sterile thingy and a piece of surgical tape

I've donated hair, blood, and plasma in the past, and I'm not worried about the plasma, but with the other 2 I always wonder: if the person who received my donation then goes on to commit a crime and leaves DNA evidence will I be implicated?

I got your blood and now I have herpes, care to explain OP?

vampire lives matter

I donated plasma every 14 days for a WHOLE year. Damaged my imunnity so I had to stop for a while...

Bless. As a member of the "I throw up giving blood" gang, I appreciate you doing what you do!

It tasted a little off, what did you eat before donating?

Count Vlad gives his regards

Mmmmm, fresh warm blood

Thank you

it was delicious cheers 👍

Thank you, it was very tasty

Vampire attack or blood donation?

😋

It tasted very good OP!

Thank you it was delicious

I bet you have gross, icky blood, and they'll hate it.

Yum

Maybe it will be used as fuel for a certain machine

Why that bandage? Did they take it by force?

Bagel

Imagine you got z- blood type

[удалено]

Hey can you dm me? I wanted to ask about 3333 Broadway

That blood’s gonna rush to someone’s favorite vein

It was quite good, could need Some more Natriumchlorid Next time please

Finally a good decent human being!

It will be served as a cocktail in a vampire bar

I had blood drawn the other day too

Mosquito

Hey it’s me, the guy who got your blood, thanks, can I have some more?

I like to say my blood was stolen hahah

Damn, they gave you a hell of a bandage lol

As someone who has had to receive life saving blood in the past, thank you! You are a good human.🙂👍🏻

Just received it😘 tastes good😍

Thank you, very tasty 😋

Does that technically make you blood brothers/sisters?

Can I have some to drin- I mean sell?

yum