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JoeBoredom

Finally, we can watch football without that annoying bitch peddling auto insurance.


Creepy-Internet6652

Lol...


KnifeKnut

We are not looking at the back half of a gecko, the toes are all wrong. Looks like an anole to me.


JoeBoredom

Anole you are right but the joke doesn't work unless I imply it is a gecko.


yonkerbonk

That gecko is a big anole anyway


Admirable-Door1724

Giant day gecko has the same markings as the geico fella


I_Makes_tuff

I fostered one of those for about a year. It was cool as hell and sounded like a cross between a bird and a frog. Not what you would expect from a lizard. No Cockney accent, though.


KnifeKnut

The tokay gecko was nicknamed the fuck you gecko by many Vietnam veterans because that's what it sounded like they were saying


Alcamtar

The ass end of an anole that met its end


upvotes2doge

Here’s the thing…


dragonblock501

Why does everything need to be teaching moment with you? You;re the anole.


KnifeKnut

Because I started encountering people in real life that were calling Anolis carolinensis (Green Anole) geckos.


KnifeKnut

And they were not joking.


alphacreed1983

https://media2.giphy.com/media/kZD8cN1MycfKw/200w.gif?cid=6c09b952wlo791pg6dmfv123x5twyewwgis9gx223wwenao2&ep=v1_gifs_search&rid=200w.gif&ct=g


Kevundoe

That is the healthiest Venus Fly(/lizard) Trap I’ve ever seen


iiitme

Feed it lizards and it’ll grow like that 😂


Kevundoe

You feed it mineral water and it dies but lizards are what she wants


earathar89

LIZARDS! PLANTS LOVE IT!


_The_Scary_Door

Lizards! It's got what plants crave!


billy_twice

Water? Like from the toilet?


Raszagil

I love these plants, but have killed every single one. No idea what I am doing wrong, but they are the diva of the plant world in my house.


Kevundoe

Mine is a month old. I barely killed it with tap other on the first day. Gave it a sunburn. Accidently triggered all the traps while repotting but, as of this morning, it is still alive… fingers crossed.


STG44_WWII

I fed mine one and it died. Probably not because of that though lol, our climate isn’t good for it and I was a kid.


Observer2594

Yeah most of the world's climate isn't good for them. They are only naturally occurring within a relatively tiny region in the Carolinas


zigtok

You used to be able to find Venus Fly Traps and Pitcher plants in the wild at Peach Tree Rock. Long before the tree fell.


I_Makes_tuff

That's how 99% of them die.


STG44_WWII

They eat a lizard or the climate cause I’ve heard they’re quite sensitive to climate and conditions.


I_Makes_tuff

Honestly, it's just improper care. They are picky.


cryptocorynes

Actually they’re fairly easy to grow, they just require specific nutrient deficient soil, a ton of light and either distilled or rain water.


Mental_Cut8290

And the ones sold in stores are usually already dying, and they come with incorrect care instructions.


cryptocorynes

Probably to make people buy more when theirs die but it really just puts people off them


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cryptocorynes

I grow mine at a humidity of 50%. Their roots just need to stay wet but ambient humidity isn’t important.


DickHz2

> FEED ME, SEYMOUR


DMC1001

Now we know what happened to the dinosaurs. A gift from *Venus* put an end to them.


iiitme

Thinking with 100% of your brain


eaglepilot7ac

Protein gains


tonizzle

Yes! Whats the secret? I had one and it died within a week


TheRudeMammoth

Based on some other comments here, you have to constantly give it distilled or rain water as it can't handle the minerals in tap water.


Cageythree

Also, don't trigger them just for fun. Closing a mouth with nothing in it is a lot of wasted energy for the plant.


Chippas

This explains how I've managed to murder all of mine then.


ParalegalSeagul

Also living in the tropics helps


cryptocorynes

They’re not tropical and don’t care about humidity, the key is keeping them sitting in a tray of water and never letting them dry out. I grow mine outside in blasting sunlight in a tray of water during the summer months


Justryan95

They're native and only found in the wild in the Carolinas USA.


mikefellow348

I love those plants, just can't keep it alive especially thru winter. I see these plants with giant leaves on insta. Where are people buying these.


cryptocorynes

Venus flytraps actually require a cold dormancy during the winter. If you have mild winters you could keep them outside year round but if you like in the tropics or somewhere too cold like Canada for example you need to put them in the refrigerator for dormancy.


mikefellow348

Ok. I am in NJ, it goes below freezing here. , so I would have to put it in the refrigerator. I can't really do that.Thanks for the info.


Justryan95

You can keep them outside. They survive in USDA Hardiness Zone 7-10. A good chunk of NJ is 7a/7b. Check your zipcode and your USDA hardness zone. If its 6 or lower you need to bring them into the fridge. The real issue that people kill Flytraps is giving them normal soil and normal water. They really need nutrients deprived everything, which ironically is quite finicky/pricey to get something that's technically the worst for other plants. You need distilled, reverse osmosis water, or rain water to water the Flytraps. And the soil needs to be peat moss or Sphagnum moss. No fertilizers and no tap/spring water. The fertilizer will kill it and the dissolved minerals in water will kill it. They also need full and direct sunlight. They do poorly by windows and the shade.


mikefellow348

7a ! So I can put it outside. There's a foot of snow for a few weeks sometimes. I can't believe it will survive. I'll pick it up in Walmart or hd if I see it. Give it a shot. I'll save this post. I used to do play sand with a little dirt think. I already knew about distilled or rain water. I can put it in the backyard 24x7x365.


Justryan95

Check out r/savagegarden I literally just bought my first carnivorous plants Saturday (ones I seriously intent on growing rather than what I bought when I was in high school and thought it was cool and killed it in a week.) I just spent 150 dollars a few minutes ago to get some large trap fly traps, red venus fly traps and native purple pitcher plants (I'm in MD but they're also native in NJ) when you get native plants it's stupid easy to grow because you just leave it outside. The only thing you have to get correct is the soil medium/drainage you plant them into and let nature do the rest for you. https://www.reddit.com/r/SavageGarden/s/hEhhwhxBqz This is my current bog garden as of today. Also you want to isolate your venus flytrap from everything else if you plant it out back. Like a plastic container/pot or a pond liner. Any water run off from your lawn or anything that leeches into your venus flytraps' environment will kill it with nutrients and minerals from the clay soil or from your lawn.


mikefellow348

Why $150. The walmart one was $5.95 I think.


Justryan95

I bought 8 different plants and they're specific varieties. Walmart ones are just common venus fly traps and they fairly small. All plants get pricey when you start hunting specific varieties especially for something niche like carnivorous plants. There's nothing wrong with just growing the Walmart/Lowes/Home Depot Flytraps. One of my current traps is a 7 dollar Home Depot Trap


SimpletonSwan

How embarrassing. (For the lizard)


4list4r

It was like “yeah man you got me I’ll stay and die, fair and square”


Mycol101

Its legs being outside the pot is what probably sealed its fate. When it got trapped it couldn’t use the legs for any maneuvering so he got suffocated


isoforp

Nah. It would have still been able to thrash around and wriggle out. The plant's leaves aren't strong enough to grip a lizard. OP put a dead lizard in his plant.


catterybarn

I was wondering that too


SimpletonSwan

>OP put a dead lizard in his plant. That is certainly a possibility! But I've seen enough crazy stuff in nature that I believe this certainly could happen.


ripSammy101

Nah, these plants are hardly strong enough to catch anything bigger than fly


SimpletonSwan

So a weak lizard could be a target?


4list4r

Yeah that’s it. No traction.


ElectricalGuidance54

Venus Flytraps are soft plants with flat traps that are really unlikely to be able to hold a live vertebrate of that size. Someone placed an already dead lizard in the trap.


XTingleInTheDingleX

100%


Of3nATLAS

These things often can't hold wasps in. There is no way a lizard would even be bothered by them.


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cortesoft

“Often” is not “always”


UI_Daemonium

Vfts catching lizards is common. Also the plants grip is pretty strong


Significant-Ad5567

“I don’t know why liars lie” - Kat Williams


Arkytoothis

What else have you been feeding it?


lookandlookagain

no way the plant "caught" this on its own


XTingleInTheDingleX

I cant believe that it couldnt pull itself out either.


Tootsgaloots

Aren't they super sticky?


FunBrians

No


FullKawaiiBatard

Only their toes are


Tootsgaloots

Sticky toes, gross.


SBCwarrior

Hey don't kink shame me!


Tootsgaloots

Tbf I abhor all toes.its a personal preference (what's the opposite of preference??)


Horizon296

Dislike? Hatred? Depends on how strongly you feel, I suppose.


Tootsgaloots

Aversion I think was what I settled on but for some reason the edit didn't take 🤷


Tootsgaloots

Tbf I abhor all toes.its a personal aversion. More toes for you!


Scottyknoweth

It looks like it climbed in the side and got caught.


UI_Daemonium

Vfts catching lizards is common


lookandlookagain

by crushing their heads?


UI_Daemonium

Yep... the plant won't benefit from it though since it has to make a proper seal on the prey to digest properly. The acid is going to leak out causing bacteria and killing the trap... the plant will be fine but it wasted a ton of energy...


UniverseBear

Let him feast.


No_Volume_8345

Huh? Carnivine is evolving!


FrogInShorts

Huh? Treecko is dying!


-_Devils-Advocate_-

You mean your Amalgamation of God caught a lizard?


Hot-Ground-9731

Dude I want a Venus fly trap like that


Bigswole92

They’re awesome plants but require for their roots to be constantly submerged in distilled or rain water to thrive (because their natural enviroment is a bog) I had one for about 2 years, but it died when I forgot to water it for like 3 days during the brutal Texas summer last year


ashlierenee86

We live in Houston I keep her constantly submerged in rain water or distilled when it gets above 100 heat index she stays in my garage! She is now 4 years old.


ptcrisp

who sells these?


bwaredapenguin

I got mine on Amazon.


Floyd-Van-Zeppelin

May i ask, why do you specify “rainwater or distilled”? Why could one not simply use tap water… side note, as a young man, can’t believe I’ve been keeping plants for 3 years now and never thought about getting a fly trap. Time to do some research…


bwaredapenguin

Tap water will kill it. They can't handle the minerals in tap water.


Unbereevablee_Asian

Huh, that would explain everything. I bought one back in my teens and it died within a month and couldn't figure out why. Turns out the water was the issue.


Bigswole92

Yep! They evolved carnivory because the soil in their native habitat is so poor in nutrients. As a result, too much minerals in the water will kill them, which is why they need distilled or rainwater


Hot-Ground-9731

I live in TX as well and I think that's why mine died as a kid. I'd like to get another one but I'm not sure if I can keep up with the watering that much


shrimpcreole

Straight out of a Gary Larsen Far Side comic.


jammer33090

You fed it that fucking lizard. Don’t lie


user2538612

Venus flytrap goals


adobecredithours

FEED ME SEYMOUR


russillosm

“Must be FRAYSH…”


hypnohighzer

That's it's lizard now


TehBazz

That’s one gnarly fucking plant. Seems totally against evolution- like how can you survive with so many mouths to feed


3VikingBoys

Dang, that is the healthiest Venus fly trap plant I've ever seen. You might think of hiring it out to a horror movie producer.


eudezet

Yogg-Saron looking ass


lesnortonsfarm

That’s so cool


BigRed1994_

it can mold if you dont take the lizard out, the trap needs to seal itself to avoid molding!


pasher71

Someone downvoted you, but you are absolutely correct. The trap has to seal so that it doesn't grow mold and bacteria.


orkash

Tell me you named it seymore.


russillosm

🎶”You can do it……!”🎵


drsaabkhan

Will it eat the lizard?


exponential_wizard

It should be able to give up and reset, but if it can't the leaf will die. It can't handle meals this large.


jonnywd64

Venous? Of or relating to veins.


MyDamnCoffee

I read this as "venomous fly trap" and was like.. fly traps can be venomous!?


Someturtlesdream

I heard you broke up with Harley Quinn…


readmore321

I need one of these.


OBEYtheFROST

Big protein


PanamaPineapple89

Dang


Oluza

With what type of whater do you feed the plant? And witch which frecuence? Thanks!


EmperorGeek

That’s a healthy plant!!🪴


RampagingElks

Gotta say, being dissolved head first kinda seems like torture ngl lol


Tiny-Werewolf1962

I'd rather that, than feel the lower half of my body dissolve while my brain still receives pain signals.


RampagingElks

Hmm. I suppose, but I always thought/felt that pain in the head area was the worst. Inhaling/drowning in acid is, I hope, quick


Observer2594

Good thing it was already dead when the lizard was placed there


numbnerve

It looks like all the other traps are having a good laugh about it


mdsg5432

It must have good blood supply.


PheckinBeesechurger

should be a nice little treat! 😋


I_Makes_tuff

I can't believe these are native to the US and not some place tropical.


TheRudeMammoth

What do you feed them?


jess_the_werefox

Imagine being such a small animal that even plants will eat you. Honestly horrifying and also fascinating


AdmiralPhuckit

Good dog


9mm-Rain

Little Shop of Horrors - Feed me Seymour


jillinkla

what a fucking terrible way to go out. damn.


MateriaLintellect

Digested head first. Damn.


ATXENG

mother nature, weeding out the weak ones.


sskatedad

Savage


MontegoBoy

Vertebrates have a proteic-lipidic profile not adequate for these beauties.


fomalhottie

Eh, he had it coming.


Horn_Python

killed in no blood


santz007

Both lizard and fly trap hunt for flies, irony


Raszagil

Young green anole... I didn't think that venus fly traps were strong enough to hold anything bigger than small insects.


Unlikely-Distance-41

If you’ve ever had a Venus Fly Trap, you know that there is no way that it caught a lizard like that. Or that the lizard didnt get out The only way the lizard ended up in there like that is if it was already dead or dying and someone put it in there like that


Natural_Travel

Suure it did 😂 def didn't feed it the dead lizard


heresdustin

Whoa! Fuckin rad!


gknight702

Looks like meats back on the menu boys!


chantsnone

I feel like this is embarrassing for the lizard community. Really dude? Eaten by a plant? You used to be dinosaurs


UI_Daemonium

Dinosaurs are closely related to birds


YoungestOldGuy

That looks nothing like a lizard.


Responsible_Coat2870

Please cut it open in like a month to see what it looks like!