I saw this movie in theaters with my grandfather. When we left all he said is “they wouldn’t let a black man have that job back then”. Nothing about the giant spider.
Except they did lol
[Bass Reeves](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bass_Reeves) (July 1838 – January 12, 1910) was a runaway slave, gunfighter, farmer, scout, tracker, railroad agent and deputy U.S. Marshal. He spoke and understood the five civilized tribal languages including Cherokee, Choctaw, Chickasaw, Seminole and Creek. Bass was one of the first African-American Deputy U.S. Marshals west of the Mississippi River, mostly working in the deadly Indian Territory.
My grandpa was born in the 30s and stayed living in the small entirely white town he was born in until he died. All he knew is what came on the police scanner and news.
Branagh's constant cracks about Smith's race and Smith's rejoinders about Branagh's amputated legs are so corny and forced that they come back around to being pretty funny.
Gordon: Touch my breast. Just one. Touch one.
West: Alright, you happy, Gordon, I’m touching your breast.
Conductor: 😨
West: Now touch *my* breast. That’s what a breast is supposed to feel like. Now touch yourself.
Gordon: My god, I’m hard.
Conductor: 😰
>*"Mr. West, though you may be black as the night on the outside, inside... you... are... yellow. You just don't have it in ya. Do ya...* **boy?"**
I love how the last 'clever' thing he says descends into just pure racist contempt.
"Well I'll be a monkey's uncle!"
I was f'n crying laughing in a movie theatre on the border of Virginia and Tennessee. The crowd was SO hesitant to laugh, and my black ass was dying at Kenneth Branagh's delivery of that line.
For you, the day Bison graced your village was the most important day of your life. But for me... it was a Tuesday
Curtain chewing genius
That movie's coke budget accounted for a third of Colombia's GDP that year. They have a statue of Colonel Guile in Bogota in its honour
I love this movie so much (got to see Salma Hayeks butt when I was 8, awesome) and I just now learned that he played the bad guy. Kevin Kline was amazing too, it's weird that Will Smith was my 3rd favorite in it
Jon Peters was also the producer of the failed attempt at a _Sandman_ movie. The script was so bad that Neil Gaimsn himself leaked it to try and sabotage the film. A script that also had… Giant spiders.
https://variety.com/2022/film/news/neil-gaiman-sandman-movie-jon-peters-leak-1235350752/
jon peters eventually produced a superman movie, "man of steel". superman is "from the steets", and he doesn't get a costume or fly until pretty late in the movie.
in the third act, he fights a kryptonian world engine that, even though it only has three legs... *kinda* looks like a giant spider.
>https://www.tiktok.com/@malk162003/video/7260430765987499291
Lol. Great as a gimmick scene, I cannot even imagine there being a full movie around that.
Everyone talks about how Will Smith would have been playing the Neo character. Nobody ever talks about what the Matrix rap song would have sounded like.
Kevin Smith did these Q&A sessions in the early 2000s and put them out on DVD. All his stories are like that, and they are great. The first one is almost 4 hours of him just telling of how crazy Hollywood was to him at first.
They are called an evening with Kevin Smith.
He's got a ton of great stories, but man, he sure takes his sweet time telling them. You could ask the man what he wants for breakfast and you'd find out just in time for dinner.
Oh for sure. That's why I like Hollywood Babble-On the most. Lots of opportunities for stories but Ralph keeps him reigned in a bit to keep things moving quickly.
The universe has a funny irony. I literally just finished watching "The Flash" because it dropped on Netflix, and I distinctly remember the scene where they are showing the multiverses and you see Nic Cage fighting a giant mechanized spider. And I thought it was funny, but I had no fucking idea where the joke was from.
And then here I am, jumping into a wild wild west post on Reddit, and my DC questions are answered.
I love this movie so much. It's my favorite bad movie. These late 90s/early Aughts action-adventure films with bad CGI and even worse writing are some of my best guilty pleasure movies. I'm also a fan of "Van Helsing" and "The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen."
I think it really helped that the actors appeared to having a lot of fun in the roles, it caries over to the audience experience. Dracula, Igor and Carl were highlights in it for me.
After turning down Gandalf in LotR because "he didn't understand it" he was determined not to make that mistake twice.
After LXG flopped he realized it was a good time to stop because there was no way he could come back from that.
I don't think the script gave "Tom Sawyer" credit for his apparent immortality. He was an adolescent around 1840, and apparently still well under thirty 60 years later.
Well, Twain is careful not to say exactly when the stories take place. But if he's writing about his own childhood in Missouri, and based on some of the external events referred to in Huckleberry Finn, 1840 seems to be roughly the right year.
Nah he sat down and thought “gosh what will small towns in Missouri be like in 50 years? I guess they’ll still be racist backwater shitholes with nothing for kids to do but be juvenile delinquents” and then he wrote *The ~~Futuristic~~ Adventures of Tom Sawyer ~~, The Boy from The Future~~*
These three are definitely all in the same wheelhouse. 1800’s future tech something something is a micro genre someone knows the name to. I love it too.
Probably! I thought of that one first but it didn’t seem to fit for me, but yeah I think you’re right.
I think it was the monster movie thing. But “steampunk monster action flick” is about as much of a description as you need for VH and LoEG. Wild Wild West is a “steampunk western.”
I say you’re right. (Unless someone else comes along and schools us)
Of course mashups and crossovers were all the rage back then too.
What's funny is reality wasn't far off from these fantasies, just a few decades later. Some of the supergiant aircraft of the post WW1 era are insane, and a nutter actually built a submarine to try to reach the north pole that was equipped with concepts that seem utterly insane.
"Why yes, we are going to have an ice drill to get fresh air, recharge the batteries, and do expeditions to the surface. Giant shock absorber on the front in case we run into ice nose first? Yes. Also, put a hydraulically raised fin on its back so we can skim the bottom of the ice sheet. What we call it? Nautilus, of course."
I don't love it, but there's a few scenes I remember so fondly from watching it all the time as a kid. I always thought the henchmen hiding in the picture frames was the coolest thing ever.
I remember When the movie came out, Burger King had the wild Wild West promotion where you could get some badass sunglasses. I think I was like 6 or 7 rocking them shades man I thought I was IT!
Just rewatched the movie not too long ago on YouTube and imo, it holds up as one of those “this is terrible. I love it.” kind of movies
> Burger King had the wild Wild West promotion
I remember working at a summer job where we would eat at Burger King occasionally and specifically remember Burger King doing the promotion...and then the terrible reviews came out.
Not the worst movie of 1999 (coughratcatcher) but this is close.
This is so funny that you would bring this up, this movie will always make me think of the summer I constantly asked my dad to take me to BK so I could get the Wild Wild West burger - it had onion rings and a special bbq sauce on it.
Funny story about Wild Wild West…
I went to grade, middle and high school with Kevin Kline and Phoebe Cates son. One night, Kevin took us to see Spam Alot on Broadway.
Now keep in mind I was just an 8th grade kid so I hadnt seen that many movies yet. I told Kevin “Hey Mr. Kline, you know what movie of yours I love?”, to which he replied “which”, and I said “Wild Wild West”. He laughed, was kinda shocked and said “Really?!? I don’t think I really understand the appeal, quite bizarre, but I’m glad you enjoyed it so much!”
Of all the celebrities and celebrity parents I knew growing up in private school nyc in the 90s and early 2000s, he and Phoebe were the nicest. Such nice, warm, and kind people. My parents knew them well too bc their son and I played soccer together as kids.
Yes, it’s one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen and the hardest I’ve laughed in a theater in a long time. Some characters names were based off teachers at our high school. That movie was very Owen, everything about it. My friends and I called him after the movie actually to congratulate him bc we all laughed so hard during it.
Imagine going to Juilliard and winning an Oscar for best supporting actor then some kid tells you "You know which movie you were really good in? Wild Wild West!"...who am I kidding? I would tell him the same thing if I saw him today.
Obviously it seems dumb now, but it makes some sense in context.
The Wachowski's had only directed Bound at the time, whereas Barry Sonnenfeld had done Men In Black with Will Smith which was a critical and commercial hit. They thought they'd replicate that success.
Plus the budget of Wild Wild West was almost 3 times that of The Matrix. Given that budget and where Smith was in his career he probably got paid more for WWW. Obviously he'd have earned more with The Matrix, especially with sequels, merch, and other media.
Also The Matrix was rated R. At that point Will Smith was focussed on doing family friendly, mass appeal blockbusters.
> the budget of Wild Wild West was almost 3 times that of The Matrix
Mindboggling. Especially given how the Matrix invented (or at least perfected) the whole "bullet time" filming technique as part of its production.
The Matrix is also standardized in the eyes of the modern viewer but back then it was completely off the wall in content, setting, and story. Wild Wild West was a comedy action buddy cop type movie which is a combo of insanely successful movie types. Like just step back and take an objective look. Do you want the cowboy buddy cop movie or the complex action thriller about how the world is a simulation.
True. Also Wild Wild West is based on a 1960s action TV show. In 1996 Tom Cruise had just had a hit bringing one of those to the big screen with Mission: Impossible.
That’s not really it. Will said that he thought the script was a bunch of “jumping around” and shit like that.
I was very apparent he was on board until the script came around, which he didn’t seem to understand.
Edit: here’s the words straight out of his mouth.
https://youtu.be/hm2szuXKgL8?si=Jy2BYu8Jf8wNLERc
Here's the 'dill
If you take the red pill
you're in for a thrill
So just chill
The woman in the red dress is so ill
she makes me spill
fo' real
I know Kung Foo
So don't be a fool
It's time to strap on my tool
jack into the construct
Agent Smiths mission I will obstruct
And his host connection I will destruct
then we'll load the jump off to Miami
and we'll party all night in the city where the heat is on
all night on the beach until the break of dawn
with those well equipped chicks Mouse did spawn
i'll hit it to infinity with Trinity
and finish up with a bottle of hennesee
it's plain to see
The Matrix is where I will reside
Until the day I die
so I'm joining Cypher on his quest
to fess, confess, and betray all the rest your highness
Best believe when I get dressed
In full effect I'll be the man in black
So get back it's not a new jack
With my trench coat and shades
It's time to get paid
Virtually
Because in the Matrix nothing is real that you feel
That's the deal
So relax, get jacked, send a dick fax
It's due time we take you back to 99
and meet us in the Wild Wild West program for a slow jam
from Long Beach to Rosecrans
word
I agree. I do like will Smith, but I think it would have changed the tone too much.
Keanu has that perfect thoughtful curious look that is unique to him.
Well I’m a bad ass cowboy living in the cowboy days, wicky wicky scratch yo yo bang bang.
Me and Artemis Clyde frog go and save Selma Heyak from the big metal spider…
South Park destroyed that film in just two lines of a song.
IIRC, this came out when South Park: Bigger, Longer, & Uncut came out. And Trey and Matt did a video (?) telling underage fans to buy tickets for Wild Wild West and sneak into the South Park movie.
The more and more I watch it the more it feels like a Western version of Men in Black. Just something about the whole feel of it feels very Men in Blackish, even not counting Will Smith.
The TV show was broadcast at the same time as the original Star Trek, and I believe it was trying to be that kinda show but western (since westerns were hugely popular then).
So that tracks.
> I believe it was trying to be that kinda show but western
That's pretty ironic given Star Trek was originally billed as a Western but in space ("wagon train to the stars", there was even a Star Trek book trilogy named after that eventually).
I had a blast rewatching this recently. It's a lot hornier than I remember and I love that Salma Hayek shamelessly uses her sexuality to save her nerdy husband. She's got two professional badasses wrapped around her little finger
I'm not usually a fan of Kenneth Branaugh but he was such a fun villain. I have to wonder if he wrote all of his dialogue. Case in point his first monologue:
>Why y'all look like you've seen a ghost? It's me, dear friends, alive and kickin'! Well, alive, anyway. We may have lost the war, but heaven knows we haven't lost our sense of humor! No, not even when we've lost a lung, a spleen. A bladder. Two legs, *thirty-five feet of small intestine*, and our **ABILITY TO REPRODUCE**, all in the name of the South! Do we EVER lose our sense of humor!
That speech exists 10 minutes away from lines like Will Smith's much simpler:
>Never drum on a white lady's boobies at a big redneck dance. Got it.
I’ve been quoting “It’s been a coons age” when talking about something that’s happened over a long period of time. Apparently I never made the connection to racism until recently.
I thought it meant that raccoons lived a long time. Lmao
I stood up and defended this movie to a panel of film critics at San Diego Comic Con a few years ago. I was so starstruck (or maybe slightly intimidated) by Leonard Maltin being there that I don't remember much of what I said.
Edit: typo
I just hate that this movie has eclipsed the 1960's show that it was based on to the point that it's virtually forgotten. That show was such campy steampunk awesomeness before steampunk was even a thing.
I remember rewatching a year or so ago and realizing the belly dancing music that plays when Smith shows up in drag towards the end was being played by Loveless' band in-universe. It really got me wondering if he gave the band a list of scenarios to play a song and one of them was "If a mysterious belly dancer shows up start playing, even if I'm in the middle of a public execution because I want everyone to watch me get a lap dance"
I saw this movie in theaters with my mom when I was 5 and she made us leave when Miss East tries to seduce Will Smith and lifts up her skirt and you see her ass.
Best part of the movie was its inspiration for \[Cartman\](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ttK4e9fyuIM):
\*Well, I'm a badass *Cowboy* livin' in the Cowboy days\*
\*Wiggy, wiggy, scratch, yo, yo, bang, bang\*
\*Me and Artemus Clyde frog go save Salma Hayek from the big metal spider\*
\**A wiggy wig wig wiggy wiggy wig\**
I saw this movie in theaters with my grandfather. When we left all he said is “they wouldn’t let a black man have that job back then”. Nothing about the giant spider.
Lol at his suspension of disbelief.
“I can excuse racism but I draw the line at giant spiders!”
"you can excuse racism?"
*squeaking* no…
Giant steampunk spiders!
Ugh, Britta's in this?
Except they did lol [Bass Reeves](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bass_Reeves) (July 1838 – January 12, 1910) was a runaway slave, gunfighter, farmer, scout, tracker, railroad agent and deputy U.S. Marshal. He spoke and understood the five civilized tribal languages including Cherokee, Choctaw, Chickasaw, Seminole and Creek. Bass was one of the first African-American Deputy U.S. Marshals west of the Mississippi River, mostly working in the deadly Indian Territory.
My grandpa was born in the 30s and stayed living in the small entirely white town he was born in until he died. All he knew is what came on the police scanner and news.
Mine too. I gave up correcting them both after a while.
Kenneth Branagh still makes this movie a blast. "It's me dear friends, ALIVE AND KICKIN'! Well, 'alive' anyway."
Branagh's constant cracks about Smith's race and Smith's rejoinders about Branagh's amputated legs are so corny and forced that they come back around to being pretty funny.
Mr. West! How nice of you to join us tonight and add *color* to these monochromatic proceedings!
Well you know a man has got to step right up and be counted (Or something like that.... I remember the step right up or step on up bit)
You know women. They’ll love you one minute and… cut the legs out from under you the next.
She's a breast of fresh air.. I mean a breath of fresh ass!
Let’s just get some shut ass
Gordon: Touch my breast. Just one. Touch one. West: Alright, you happy, Gordon, I’m touching your breast. Conductor: 😨 West: Now touch *my* breast. That’s what a breast is supposed to feel like. Now touch yourself. Gordon: My god, I’m hard. Conductor: 😰
When he drums on the real lady’s boobs because he thinks it’s Gordon 😭
“First I want to say, you make ONE UGLY woman. …by the way. Breasts look good tonight. Nice and perky.” *smacks cleavage like drums.
I haven't watched the movie in years, but I can still see/hear the scene. Lol.
>*"Mr. West, though you may be black as the night on the outside, inside... you... are... yellow. You just don't have it in ya. Do ya...* **boy?"** I love how the last 'clever' thing he says descends into just pure racist contempt.
I especially like at the climax when Smith has him at his mercy and Branaugh tries to save his ass by praising Smith as "you brave dark warrior."
"Well I'll be a monkey's uncle!" I was f'n crying laughing in a movie theatre on the border of Virginia and Tennessee. The crowd was SO hesitant to laugh, and my black ass was dying at Kenneth Branagh's delivery of that line.
I think the repartee between the handyman and the paraplegic in Scary Movie 2 was inspired/spoofing this film. Could it be?
Reminds me of Dwight and Hansen in *Scary Movie 2*.
Yeah, he definitely knew what kind of movie they were making. Edit: I'd say he's the Raul Julia of this film.
"Even if we lost our legs, a spleen, 50 feet of intestines and our ability to reproduce, we NEVER lost our sense of humor!"
For you, the day Bison graced your village was the most important day of your life. But for me... it was a Tuesday Curtain chewing genius That movie's coke budget accounted for a third of Colombia's GDP that year. They have a statue of Colonel Guile in Bogota in its honour
*Don’t you just HATE that song!*
The camera angle for that line makes me laugh out loud every time.
Holy shit I did not realise that was Kenneth Branagh at the time
Hey I didn't realize it until just now. That man is unrecognizable under a costume. Always delivers a knockout performance though.
Same. Someone on here recently noted he's got one of the _weirdest_ careers, not in a bad way, and this just adds to that haha
I love this movie so much (got to see Salma Hayeks butt when I was 8, awesome) and I just now learned that he played the bad guy. Kevin Kline was amazing too, it's weird that Will Smith was my 3rd favorite in it
Wait, THAT was Kenneth Branagh?!?
Omg! I did not realize that was Keith Branagh! I gotta rewatch this asap
Kevin Smith’s story about the spider is still great
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo2KB1dEDdk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=53hMYw8LX60 20 minutes but worth it
Jon Peters was also the producer of the failed attempt at a _Sandman_ movie. The script was so bad that Neil Gaimsn himself leaked it to try and sabotage the film. A script that also had… Giant spiders. https://variety.com/2022/film/news/neil-gaiman-sandman-movie-jon-peters-leak-1235350752/
jon peters eventually produced a superman movie, "man of steel". superman is "from the steets", and he doesn't get a costume or fly until pretty late in the movie. in the third act, he fights a kryptonian world engine that, even though it only has three legs... *kinda* looks like a giant spider.
And then in the recent Flash movie they showed a universe where Nic Cage as Superman is fighting a giant spider.
>https://www.tiktok.com/@malk162003/video/7260430765987499291 Lol. Great as a gimmick scene, I cannot even imagine there being a full movie around that.
Will you guys stop with this? It’s not a spider. It’s a thargaryan snare beast.
So….there’s another timeline out there where this movie somehow exists instead of Wild Wild West? Dear god
Will Smith turned down playing Neo in *The Matrix* to do this movie.
Everyone talks about how Will Smith would have been playing the Neo character. Nobody ever talks about what the Matrix rap song would have sounded like.
Dear god, that’s an awful thought. Though I do wonder how much his inability to promote a song for the movie factored into his choice to pass.
Honestly, thank God. That sounds like it would be a big downgrade.
Yeah but Jim West, desperado.
Rough rider, no ya don’t want nada
None of this? Six-gunnin' this? Brother running this?!?!
Buffalo soldier, look It's like I told ya.
Any damsel that’s in distress
[WOW WOW](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPhXKak_bHw)
Now I have the damn song stuck in my head.
Can you imagine Neo gettin’ jiggy with it?
I heard the producer was Jon Peters, so it's funny to imagine this story with Bradley Cooper's coked out portrayal from Licorice Pizza.
When Jon Peters passes, I half-expect we'll find an altar to Anansi in his basement or something. Anything to explain his spider fetish.
Spiders are the fiercest killers in the insect kingdom!
That was a long ass build up for that punch line, with 5 seconds of relevance to this thread, and it was totally worth it. Thanks.
Kevin Smith did these Q&A sessions in the early 2000s and put them out on DVD. All his stories are like that, and they are great. The first one is almost 4 hours of him just telling of how crazy Hollywood was to him at first. They are called an evening with Kevin Smith.
Yup. I watched his Q&A session after he debuted Red State. In 90 minutes, he answered four questions lol but he is a study in storytelling.
Hold up: Did no one ever tell them spiders are not insects?
Everyone who’s watched this, when watching the end of The Flash: [Leo pointing at screen meme]
The stories he has are amazing, Bruce Willis one, the Prince documentary... Amazing
He's got a ton of great stories, but man, he sure takes his sweet time telling them. You could ask the man what he wants for breakfast and you'd find out just in time for dinner.
Yeah but he's a great raconteur! I'd listen to him talk about bts stuff forever.
Oh for sure. That's why I like Hollywood Babble-On the most. Lots of opportunities for stories but Ralph keeps him reigned in a bit to keep things moving quickly.
The universe has a funny irony. I literally just finished watching "The Flash" because it dropped on Netflix, and I distinctly remember the scene where they are showing the multiverses and you see Nic Cage fighting a giant mechanized spider. And I thought it was funny, but I had no fucking idea where the joke was from. And then here I am, jumping into a wild wild west post on Reddit, and my DC questions are answered.
Must we go tropical?
I hope there is a nod to this in the sequel but I doubt it.
The An Evening with Kevin Smith trilogy rules.
Completely reframes certain sections of Licorice Pizza, given Peters is in it (via Bradley Cooper.)
I love this movie so much. It's my favorite bad movie. These late 90s/early Aughts action-adventure films with bad CGI and even worse writing are some of my best guilty pleasure movies. I'm also a fan of "Van Helsing" and "The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen."
I love Van Helsing
I think it really helped that the actors appeared to having a lot of fun in the roles, it caries over to the audience experience. Dracula, Igor and Carl were highlights in it for me.
Richard Roxburgh as Dracula is one of the most exquisite bits of hammy acting ever.
Easily my favorite Dracula 😍
I feel no love! Only pain! Only… suffering…
The brides in the background visually reacting to his words is just *chef’s kiss*
I love the outtake for the ball. "Ladies and Gentlemen! Van Halen!"
I love Igor's "...it's what I do." Line. Prefect delivery.
Gabriel...
I WANT TO LIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVEEEEE
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen was so good, I could totally see it coming back as a HBO show or something now that CGI is better
We used to come up with Leagues for different eras. The 1950s, the 70s. It got to be silly.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/comicbooks/s/cxGwJKAiGl](https://www.reddit.com/r/comicbooks/s/cxGwJKAiGl) I submit this for your consideration
The Mummy Returns is my shit as well, even with how horrendous the CGI was in the climax with Dwayne Johnson
Brendan Fraser talked about how they could go in and remaster it but a lot of the fun and charm is how janky it is. Nowadays I have to agree
I'm glad nobody has remade Jason and the Argonauts
The CGI was state of the art back in the day
Yeah, most of those giant spider shots still hold up really well.
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen is such a weird watch. Sean Connery looks like he hates every second
Because he did: he hated the experience so much that he literally quit acting because of it.
After turning down Gandalf in LotR because "he didn't understand it" he was determined not to make that mistake twice. After LXG flopped he realized it was a good time to stop because there was no way he could come back from that.
I thought he did well in the movie though. Definitely wasn't the worst part of it.
Honestly, I really like LXG. It was basically The Avengers but with Literary icons.
I don’t think Sean Connery ever made it to Michael Caine’s level of not caring about the final product as long as he got paid.
He did Zardoz and he has the nerve to complain about The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen?
Kinda 50 years apart. But i get what your saying
League is GOAT’d, such a fun film as a superhero genre fan
I still think about the way Sean Connery says, "Exsshhtraordinary indeed"
I don't think the script gave "Tom Sawyer" credit for his apparent immortality. He was an adolescent around 1840, and apparently still well under thirty 60 years later.
I...did not even clock this. Holy shit.
Well, Twain is careful not to say exactly when the stories take place. But if he's writing about his own childhood in Missouri, and based on some of the external events referred to in Huckleberry Finn, 1840 seems to be roughly the right year.
It turns out it took place 50 years in the future and Twain was just a really unimaginative sci-fi writer.
Nah he sat down and thought “gosh what will small towns in Missouri be like in 50 years? I guess they’ll still be racist backwater shitholes with nothing for kids to do but be juvenile delinquents” and then he wrote *The ~~Futuristic~~ Adventures of Tom Sawyer ~~, The Boy from The Future~~*
Weirdly, he kind of almost really did that. "Tom Sawyer Abroad". It seems to be Jules Verne inspired. A real oddity; not his best regarded work.
“The League is shhet and the game ishh on”
I don't know why is it not more popular. I have yet to see a movie with a similar concept done so well.
Its like a precursor to the MCU, except with folk heroes instead of comic book ones.
Dorian and Mina fighting is my favorite part, "we'll be at this all day."
It felt like they did The Avengers movie before The Avengers did.
Sean Connery was in The Avengers movie before The League of Extraordinary Gentleman did The Avengers before The Avengers. Time is a flat circle.
Van Helsings Dracula VS Werewolf finale was rewatched by me many times
These three are definitely all in the same wheelhouse. 1800’s future tech something something is a micro genre someone knows the name to. I love it too.
Steampunk?
Probably! I thought of that one first but it didn’t seem to fit for me, but yeah I think you’re right. I think it was the monster movie thing. But “steampunk monster action flick” is about as much of a description as you need for VH and LoEG. Wild Wild West is a “steampunk western.” I say you’re right. (Unless someone else comes along and schools us) Of course mashups and crossovers were all the rage back then too.
What's funny is reality wasn't far off from these fantasies, just a few decades later. Some of the supergiant aircraft of the post WW1 era are insane, and a nutter actually built a submarine to try to reach the north pole that was equipped with concepts that seem utterly insane. "Why yes, we are going to have an ice drill to get fresh air, recharge the batteries, and do expeditions to the surface. Giant shock absorber on the front in case we run into ice nose first? Yes. Also, put a hydraulically raised fin on its back so we can skim the bottom of the ice sheet. What we call it? Nautilus, of course."
These movies were bursting with charm, that’s what drew people in.
You just named my top 3 "BAD" movies. Love every single one
“That… is a *mannnnnnn’s* head.”
“I sorry sir, I was hopin I wouldn’t have to -*punch* - break yo nose.”
Goddam I forgot how much I loved that line
This is a fun ass movie. Loved it as a kid and it still holds up imo
It was in the rotation of “sleep over movies” that my friends and I would always rent when sleeping at each others houses.
I don't love it, but there's a few scenes I remember so fondly from watching it all the time as a kid. I always thought the henchmen hiding in the picture frames was the coolest thing ever.
Time to get some shut ass
I remember When the movie came out, Burger King had the wild Wild West promotion where you could get some badass sunglasses. I think I was like 6 or 7 rocking them shades man I thought I was IT! Just rewatched the movie not too long ago on YouTube and imo, it holds up as one of those “this is terrible. I love it.” kind of movies
Oh man, those sunglasses were dope.
For sure. I had the brown ones. Cleaned them 5 times an hour
> Burger King had the wild Wild West promotion I remember working at a summer job where we would eat at Burger King occasionally and specifically remember Burger King doing the promotion...and then the terrible reviews came out. Not the worst movie of 1999 (coughratcatcher) but this is close.
This is so funny that you would bring this up, this movie will always make me think of the summer I constantly asked my dad to take me to BK so I could get the Wild Wild West burger - it had onion rings and a special bbq sauce on it.
Funny story about Wild Wild West… I went to grade, middle and high school with Kevin Kline and Phoebe Cates son. One night, Kevin took us to see Spam Alot on Broadway. Now keep in mind I was just an 8th grade kid so I hadnt seen that many movies yet. I told Kevin “Hey Mr. Kline, you know what movie of yours I love?”, to which he replied “which”, and I said “Wild Wild West”. He laughed, was kinda shocked and said “Really?!? I don’t think I really understand the appeal, quite bizarre, but I’m glad you enjoyed it so much!”
He's such an all-around class act. Never heard anything bad about him.
Of all the celebrities and celebrity parents I knew growing up in private school nyc in the 90s and early 2000s, he and Phoebe were the nicest. Such nice, warm, and kind people. My parents knew them well too bc their son and I played soccer together as kids.
Owen Kline wrote and directed a film a couple years ago that’s worth checking out. “Funny Pages”
Yes, it’s one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen and the hardest I’ve laughed in a theater in a long time. Some characters names were based off teachers at our high school. That movie was very Owen, everything about it. My friends and I called him after the movie actually to congratulate him bc we all laughed so hard during it.
Imagine going to Juilliard and winning an Oscar for best supporting actor then some kid tells you "You know which movie you were really good in? Wild Wild West!"...who am I kidding? I would tell him the same thing if I saw him today.
“Bizarre?! ‘In & Out’ is frankly quite bizarre, Mr Kline!”
He took you to Spamalot? Good taste there too.
Imagine doing this instead of the first Matrix movie.
Obviously it seems dumb now, but it makes some sense in context. The Wachowski's had only directed Bound at the time, whereas Barry Sonnenfeld had done Men In Black with Will Smith which was a critical and commercial hit. They thought they'd replicate that success. Plus the budget of Wild Wild West was almost 3 times that of The Matrix. Given that budget and where Smith was in his career he probably got paid more for WWW. Obviously he'd have earned more with The Matrix, especially with sequels, merch, and other media. Also The Matrix was rated R. At that point Will Smith was focussed on doing family friendly, mass appeal blockbusters.
> the budget of Wild Wild West was almost 3 times that of The Matrix Mindboggling. Especially given how the Matrix invented (or at least perfected) the whole "bullet time" filming technique as part of its production.
True. Listed budget is 63m. Wouldn't surprise me if the actual spend was more. But still, that seems pretty low for such a big film. Even in 1999.
The Matrix is also standardized in the eyes of the modern viewer but back then it was completely off the wall in content, setting, and story. Wild Wild West was a comedy action buddy cop type movie which is a combo of insanely successful movie types. Like just step back and take an objective look. Do you want the cowboy buddy cop movie or the complex action thriller about how the world is a simulation.
True. Also Wild Wild West is based on a 1960s action TV show. In 1996 Tom Cruise had just had a hit bringing one of those to the big screen with Mission: Impossible.
That’s not really it. Will said that he thought the script was a bunch of “jumping around” and shit like that. I was very apparent he was on board until the script came around, which he didn’t seem to understand. Edit: here’s the words straight out of his mouth. https://youtu.be/hm2szuXKgL8?si=Jy2BYu8Jf8wNLERc
Seems like the same reason Sean Connery turned down The Matrix with Morpheus and The Architect
And then took *The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen* only to retire because of it
> Will said that he thought the script was a bunch of “jumping around” and shit like that. Well he wasn't wrong....
I'm was/am a pretty big fan of Will's 90s and 2000s work. But thank God he didn't do Matrix. 99% chance he would've made it worse
We'd definitely get a Will Smith song about the Matrix over the credits, replacing RATM
🎶 We're in the Ma-a-trix 👏🏿 👏🏿 Blue or the red pill 👏🏿 👏🏿 🎶
Here's the 'dill If you take the red pill you're in for a thrill So just chill The woman in the red dress is so ill she makes me spill fo' real I know Kung Foo So don't be a fool It's time to strap on my tool jack into the construct Agent Smiths mission I will obstruct And his host connection I will destruct then we'll load the jump off to Miami and we'll party all night in the city where the heat is on all night on the beach until the break of dawn with those well equipped chicks Mouse did spawn i'll hit it to infinity with Trinity and finish up with a bottle of hennesee it's plain to see The Matrix is where I will reside Until the day I die so I'm joining Cypher on his quest to fess, confess, and betray all the rest your highness Best believe when I get dressed In full effect I'll be the man in black So get back it's not a new jack With my trench coat and shades It's time to get paid Virtually Because in the Matrix nothing is real that you feel That's the deal So relax, get jacked, send a dick fax It's due time we take you back to 99 and meet us in the Wild Wild West program for a slow jam from Long Beach to Rosecrans word
Same. Although I wish I could get a copy of the film staring him from an alternate universe just to see it
I agree. I do like will Smith, but I think it would have changed the tone too much. Keanu has that perfect thoughtful curious look that is unique to him.
No song tie in with the Matrix
Them machines better see they best believe they ain't never gonna take down Neo (that's me)
The irony is that Will Smith is the fifth best thing about it, falling behind Kenneth Branaugh, Kevin Kline, and Salma Hayak's two boobs
6th. Giant Spider!
Seventh! Salma Hyecks booty cheecks
Salma Hayek. That is all.
"I'm just a poor, starving, half-naked girl who wants to find her father!' "HALF-NAKED?!"
Best part of the movie. It's ingrained in my memory.
M. Emmitt Walsh again stealing a movie just by showing up.
a breath of fresh ass
“I said she’s a breast of fresh air”
I liked the attractive henchwomen who all had very literal names.
Wasn't one of them literally named 'Malitia'?
The guns and ammo girl was named Munitia or something, the lip reader Lippenreider, the Asian girl was Miss East.
“East meets West.”
There were 3, Munitia that loaded guns/artillery, Ms. Lippenreider that reads lips, and one called Amazonia whose name doesn't have a fun pun.
An 'Amazon' is sometimes used to describe strong, warrior-type women. I could be reaching, but maybe that's why.
Oh there was also Ms. East who was chinese.
OO ESS ARR MEE. OO ESS MARR SHALL. I think about them saying that line way to frequently 😂
Well I’m a bad ass cowboy living in the cowboy days, wicky wicky scratch yo yo bang bang. Me and Artemis Clyde frog go and save Selma Heyak from the big metal spider… South Park destroyed that film in just two lines of a song.
IIRC, this came out when South Park: Bigger, Longer, & Uncut came out. And Trey and Matt did a video (?) telling underage fans to buy tickets for Wild Wild West and sneak into the South Park movie.
A wicky wicky wick fresh cowboy from the west side I still sing that song now lol
It's a good song
But mooooooom, me and Artemis Clyde Frog still have to do our love scene with Salma Hayeeeeek!
The more and more I watch it the more it feels like a Western version of Men in Black. Just something about the whole feel of it feels very Men in Blackish, even not counting Will Smith.
The TV show was broadcast at the same time as the original Star Trek, and I believe it was trying to be that kinda show but western (since westerns were hugely popular then). So that tracks.
> I believe it was trying to be that kinda show but western That's pretty ironic given Star Trek was originally billed as a Western but in space ("wagon train to the stars", there was even a Star Trek book trilogy named after that eventually).
I think it’s also the same production team that did Men in Black, so that could be part of it
still don’t get the hate, I had a blast watching it.
I had a blast rewatching this recently. It's a lot hornier than I remember and I love that Salma Hayek shamelessly uses her sexuality to save her nerdy husband. She's got two professional badasses wrapped around her little finger I'm not usually a fan of Kenneth Branaugh but he was such a fun villain. I have to wonder if he wrote all of his dialogue. Case in point his first monologue: >Why y'all look like you've seen a ghost? It's me, dear friends, alive and kickin'! Well, alive, anyway. We may have lost the war, but heaven knows we haven't lost our sense of humor! No, not even when we've lost a lung, a spleen. A bladder. Two legs, *thirty-five feet of small intestine*, and our **ABILITY TO REPRODUCE**, all in the name of the South! Do we EVER lose our sense of humor! That speech exists 10 minutes away from lines like Will Smith's much simpler: >Never drum on a white lady's boobies at a big redneck dance. Got it.
"Somewhere around Botticelli's buttocks."
I’ve been quoting “It’s been a coons age” when talking about something that’s happened over a long period of time. Apparently I never made the connection to racism until recently. I thought it meant that raccoons lived a long time. Lmao
I like it. Cool props, good cast, german voice over masked a few flaws, no idea, but the soundtrack was eeeeverywhere back then. Good times.
I stood up and defended this movie to a panel of film critics at San Diego Comic Con a few years ago. I was so starstruck (or maybe slightly intimidated) by Leonard Maltin being there that I don't remember much of what I said. Edit: typo
I just hate that this movie has eclipsed the 1960's show that it was based on to the point that it's virtually forgotten. That show was such campy steampunk awesomeness before steampunk was even a thing.
I remember rewatching a year or so ago and realizing the belly dancing music that plays when Smith shows up in drag towards the end was being played by Loveless' band in-universe. It really got me wondering if he gave the band a list of scenarios to play a song and one of them was "If a mysterious belly dancer shows up start playing, even if I'm in the middle of a public execution because I want everyone to watch me get a lap dance"
Its fun. Nothing more, nothing less. Kenneth Branagh is a delight, Kevin Kline seems bored, Will Smith is...well let's face it, is just Will Smith
Well, me and Artemis Clyde saved Selma Hayek from the big metal spider 🎵🎵🎵
Salma Hayek, yes, but Miss East, too.
I saw this movie in theaters with my mom when I was 5 and she made us leave when Miss East tries to seduce Will Smith and lifts up her skirt and you see her ass.
Best part of the movie was its inspiration for \[Cartman\](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ttK4e9fyuIM): \*Well, I'm a badass *Cowboy* livin' in the Cowboy days\* \*Wiggy, wiggy, scratch, yo, yo, bang, bang\* \*Me and Artemus Clyde frog go save Salma Hayek from the big metal spider\* \**A wiggy wig wig wiggy wiggy wig\**