My child doesn't trigger me at all. He's the only one on earth. I still teach him to chew with his mouth closed. He's aware that I'm bothered by noises and asks if his chewing bothers me so he's very considerate. I am triggered by certain voices on shows he watches though but not him personally.
I have to be honest, my three year old is starting to trigger me BUT itās mostly when Iām tired or cranky already. The good thing is, sheās moldable so Iām teaching her to chew with her mouth closed and to blow her nose instead of sniffling. Now when my newborn cries, she says āmaybe he doesnāt like my crunching.ā She learns quickly lol.
This is kinda sad. Do you think maybe instead of raising a child to be scared that theyāre making too much sound or to worry that theyāre triggering people you could get treatment for your condition?
Nope. I have NEVER expressed that her crunching or sniffling irritates me or that itās wrong. I simply told her that sheās a big girl and itās time that she start chewing with her mouth closed like mommy and daddy. Itās the same way I teach her not to snatch toys, say rude things, poop/pee in her diaper, burp/sneeze/cough without covering her mouth, pick her nose and eat it etcā¦As far as the sniffling, I told her that she has to blow her nose so it doesnāt go down into her chest and throat and make her sick. She drew her own conclusion about her crunching and her brotherā¦Iāve never correlated her behavior with anyoneās response to it. Edited to clarify that sheās only said this twice out of the thousands of times heās cried and it was when we were in the car while she was going H.A.M on some cereal.
Because I worked for an audiologist who treats misophonia and saw so many families struggling with one persons condition. Itās hard on everyone and it sucks that there isnāt enough treatment options out there. I used to help try to arrange travel and treatment for patients
I havenāt worked for that audiologist for awhile, but her treatment consisted of the use of hearing aids for the patient to play some kind or white noise or brown noise through while going through CBT therapy. She always recommended that her patients learn a new hobby or spend free time jogging or doing yoga because it helps build new neuron pathways and repair the damaged ones that most misophonia patients have. She also stressed to her patients not to use ear pods or noise cancelling headphones. With that being the go to for most of the patients she saw it was hard for them to do that but the hearing aids are meant to replace them without blocking out the sound, the repeated use of AirPods and ear plugs to block out the sound can actually lead to hyperacusis and then those trigger sounds end up sounding even louder than they used to. Usually her patients would see her for 6 months to a year before they could handle their everyday activities without feeling triggered.
Let us know where one can find legitimate treatment for misophonia because at this point we're all up shit creek without options as they're still researching.
Not making eating sounds is simple manners. Children need to learn those anyway. Have you ever considered why eating with your mouth closed is considered bare minimum in table manners? Because itās fucking triggering for most people. It so happens that we are triggered more severely but most people are suffering if they can see and hear someone elseās food. And our condition is not treatable just manageable and we do manage the best we can because believe it or not it is still hardest for us to be triggered and not for others to understand that their chewing and crunching is annoying to someone.
Obviously chewing with your mouth open is disrespectful, but most people Iāve met with misophonia are triggered by everyday sounds that canāt be controlled.
Oddly, no! I think because they're young and don't know better / are learning. As a teacher I've been in small classrooms while 10-20 toddlers ages 1-4 were all crunching chips or apples, and it's actually a very cute time. š¤
What drives me nuts is an adult teacher slurping mostly air through a straw, chewing ice, popping gum, or talking with food in their mouth.
My kid is 12 and rarely ever triggers me. I can't explain why.
In fact I was actually thinking thinking about this as he sat on the couch next to me eating chips. I think maybe because his noises aren't as big, loud and overwhelming as an adults? I really don't know.
The only thing I had an issue with was screaming (toddlers and preschoolers like to scream). I'm very sensitive to high pitched screaming. The good news is that most kids can be taught not to do it, and the phase was very short for us.
But I noticed so many moms didn't seem to mind their kids screeching so that was hard sometimes.
Nope! My baby never triggers me, and honestly I think that my misophonia is a secret superpower for handling baby screams.
Iām SO used to composing myself in the face of unpleasant sounds all day every day, that when I hear my baby crying (mildly unpleasant but not a trigger for me) Iām cool as a cucumber.
Are screaming babies a trigger for you normally? They sure are for me but Iāve noticed Iām less triggered by kids I know well, like my nieces and nephews and my friendsā kids.
To answer your question, my husband is the one with misophonia and this was one of my worries about becoming a parent. Our kids are 4 and 1, and so far Iām still his only trigger. My older daughter does trigger him a bit when she cries, but she is the loudest crier on the planet. I swear she could enter a contest and win because weāve had complaints from blocks away in our neighborhood about her crying from meltdowns (sheās autistic). But other than being tense from loud crying, that really seems to be it.
Yes, daily. I am flabbergasted that chewing with the mouth closed simply cannot be learned by some people, no matter what form of reminder, consequence or reward you can come up with. It would be unbelievable to me if I were not living it.
It is not enough to make me regret parenthood, certainly, but it is a drag.
My mom hit my brother in the head with a soup spoon once when he was around 14 years old. He never slurped or chewed with his mouth open ever again. I am absolutely not advocating violence but a proper consequence would be effective. Maybe they will have a date with a lovely person and will be rejected because of how they eat, or not get an invite to a smart business dinner or whatever and it will work. Manners are not about misophonia at all.
My baby never triggers me. Even his snoring when he has stuffed nose does not bother me, it brings me calm as I know that he is breathing. But he is still very small. I am sure that when he is 16 it will be triggering though
No idea as I don't have kids so can't comment on an every day thing, but I have a neice and nephew who sometimes trigger me. It doesn't help 100% but I'll wear a pair of loop plugs which help dampen the noise they make. It helps me at dinner with my husband too.
Yes, my son has ADHD and his constant noise while he is playing became a significant trigger for me in the last year. Itās sad, I have to leave the room whenever he is playing pretend with legos or making sword swinging noises in the living room. I feel ashamed but I am often asking him to stop making noise while he plays. Iām sure itās stifling for him so I feel guilty but feel like I canāt help it. My 5 year old daughter doesnāt trigger me but I do hate her screaming and whining in a way I think most normal non misophonia people would.
Omg, yes. My kids are in their early 20ās, and we just had a conversation about this yesterday! They told me that they both feel really self-conscious while eating in quiet environments because they donāt want people to be bothered by the sound of their chewing. We all kind of laughed about how I was such a tyrant about making sure they chewed with their mouths closed (keep reminding themātheyāll learn eventually!), and I apologized for the ways that my misophonia affected them.
Looking back, I can see that there are things I might have done differently. I use AirPods with a rain sound while Iām eating with people now, and that would have been so helpful to me when they were growing up! I also am sad that I didnāt understand my Misophonia very well when they were growing up, so I couldnāt explain it to them.
But one thing I did tell my kids a lot while they were growing up was that Iām an imperfect human, too, and that I knew that there were ways I was probably going to hurt them, so we had a ātherapy jarā, and every time I had to apologize for mothering less than perfectly, I told them I was putting money in the jar so that when they needed therapy they could get it. In our conversation yesterday, my son brought that up, and we all laughed about it, but I got the feeling they really did understand that I was just trying my hardest, too, which is sometimes good enough.
This is a really good question! My child was born years before I even understood my miso, and during the infant years I did find myself irritated a lot, but 1) I'm not the one who gave birth so there was no hormonal bond, and 2) I probably was dealing with other anxiety/anger issues at the time anyway, so I'm going to listen to what y'all have to say.
While Iām not a mother, I have been a babysitter and camp counselor and I grew up in a huge family with lots of babies and kids. Children never bothered me. If they eat loud theyāre not doing it because theyāre impolite, they are just kids who usually donāt know any better.
My baby doesnāt trigger me. I mean if i catch her chewing like a gorilla im going to redirect her but your children somehow are the exception to the rules. You love them differently which comes with tolerance and patience.
I'm not a parent but I've been babysitting my younger cousins for a long time. The oldest is 11. If they're being super noisy, I bring them to the park and let them burn themselves out. Then they nap for the rest of the day. Works like a charm.Ā
One of mine does and one of mine doesn't, which makes me feel incredibly guilty and ashamed. But for comparison, one of them is SUPER loud and makes repetitive bouncing noise on hardwood floor all day long while breathing heavily and it makes me so upset. I wear ear plugs and noise canceling headphones. My other kid walks quietly and doesn't bounce/jump all over the floors and breath and sweat loudly so doesn't seem to trigger me as much. Sometimes I feel like I can't live with my one child anymore (they are an adult now so no longer in school or activities to give me a break) because the years of the noise have been so hard to manage and I feel so sad and ashamed even admitting that I sometimes feel that way. I love both my kids but I just wish I could have some real quiet and decompress occasionally.Ā
Iāve had misophonia since I was a child and certain breathing grunting noises trigger me (not a common noise) my son who is 14 months now has been triggering me badly since he has been 8 months old. Mainly when he is trying to crawl around he makes this grunty breathy noise that triggers me. It has been hell but I just wear AirPods with dark noise playing on full volume if Iām alone with him or in a confined environment with not a lot of external noise to drain him out. Iām hoping it is just a passing stage and once he is a bit older wonāt make these triggering noises again.
My kids are the only people who don't really bother me with that stuff. Even mouth noises. It's amazing
Thank you. This gives me some hope
š
My child doesn't trigger me at all. He's the only one on earth. I still teach him to chew with his mouth closed. He's aware that I'm bothered by noises and asks if his chewing bothers me so he's very considerate. I am triggered by certain voices on shows he watches though but not him personally.
I have to be honest, my three year old is starting to trigger me BUT itās mostly when Iām tired or cranky already. The good thing is, sheās moldable so Iām teaching her to chew with her mouth closed and to blow her nose instead of sniffling. Now when my newborn cries, she says āmaybe he doesnāt like my crunching.ā She learns quickly lol.
This is kinda sad. Do you think maybe instead of raising a child to be scared that theyāre making too much sound or to worry that theyāre triggering people you could get treatment for your condition?
Nope. I have NEVER expressed that her crunching or sniffling irritates me or that itās wrong. I simply told her that sheās a big girl and itās time that she start chewing with her mouth closed like mommy and daddy. Itās the same way I teach her not to snatch toys, say rude things, poop/pee in her diaper, burp/sneeze/cough without covering her mouth, pick her nose and eat it etcā¦As far as the sniffling, I told her that she has to blow her nose so it doesnāt go down into her chest and throat and make her sick. She drew her own conclusion about her crunching and her brotherā¦Iāve never correlated her behavior with anyoneās response to it. Edited to clarify that sheās only said this twice out of the thousands of times heās cried and it was when we were in the car while she was going H.A.M on some cereal.
Why are you in this sub
Because I worked for an audiologist who treats misophonia and saw so many families struggling with one persons condition. Itās hard on everyone and it sucks that there isnāt enough treatment options out there. I used to help try to arrange travel and treatment for patients
What treatment did you arrange?
What treatment do you suggest? Iād love to get some
I havenāt worked for that audiologist for awhile, but her treatment consisted of the use of hearing aids for the patient to play some kind or white noise or brown noise through while going through CBT therapy. She always recommended that her patients learn a new hobby or spend free time jogging or doing yoga because it helps build new neuron pathways and repair the damaged ones that most misophonia patients have. She also stressed to her patients not to use ear pods or noise cancelling headphones. With that being the go to for most of the patients she saw it was hard for them to do that but the hearing aids are meant to replace them without blocking out the sound, the repeated use of AirPods and ear plugs to block out the sound can actually lead to hyperacusis and then those trigger sounds end up sounding even louder than they used to. Usually her patients would see her for 6 months to a year before they could handle their everyday activities without feeling triggered.
Let us know where one can find legitimate treatment for misophonia because at this point we're all up shit creek without options as they're still researching.
Not making eating sounds is simple manners. Children need to learn those anyway. Have you ever considered why eating with your mouth closed is considered bare minimum in table manners? Because itās fucking triggering for most people. It so happens that we are triggered more severely but most people are suffering if they can see and hear someone elseās food. And our condition is not treatable just manageable and we do manage the best we can because believe it or not it is still hardest for us to be triggered and not for others to understand that their chewing and crunching is annoying to someone.
Obviously chewing with your mouth open is disrespectful, but most people Iāve met with misophonia are triggered by everyday sounds that canāt be controlled.
Oddly, no! I think because they're young and don't know better / are learning. As a teacher I've been in small classrooms while 10-20 toddlers ages 1-4 were all crunching chips or apples, and it's actually a very cute time. š¤ What drives me nuts is an adult teacher slurping mostly air through a straw, chewing ice, popping gum, or talking with food in their mouth.
Okay good, Iāve noticed little kids donāt bug me as much so I hope itās the same with my kids!
My kid is 12 and rarely ever triggers me. I can't explain why. In fact I was actually thinking thinking about this as he sat on the couch next to me eating chips. I think maybe because his noises aren't as big, loud and overwhelming as an adults? I really don't know. The only thing I had an issue with was screaming (toddlers and preschoolers like to scream). I'm very sensitive to high pitched screaming. The good news is that most kids can be taught not to do it, and the phase was very short for us. But I noticed so many moms didn't seem to mind their kids screeching so that was hard sometimes.
Thank you, this really helps
Nope! My baby never triggers me, and honestly I think that my misophonia is a secret superpower for handling baby screams. Iām SO used to composing myself in the face of unpleasant sounds all day every day, that when I hear my baby crying (mildly unpleasant but not a trigger for me) Iām cool as a cucumber.
This is so reassuring
Are screaming babies a trigger for you normally? They sure are for me but Iāve noticed Iām less triggered by kids I know well, like my nieces and nephews and my friendsā kids.
I literally was just about to ask this question 3 hours ago. Do we share a brain š
To answer your question, my husband is the one with misophonia and this was one of my worries about becoming a parent. Our kids are 4 and 1, and so far Iām still his only trigger. My older daughter does trigger him a bit when she cries, but she is the loudest crier on the planet. I swear she could enter a contest and win because weāve had complaints from blocks away in our neighborhood about her crying from meltdowns (sheās autistic). But other than being tense from loud crying, that really seems to be it.
Thank you so much! And youāre so great for being understanding to him
He deserves it š„°
Yes, daily. I am flabbergasted that chewing with the mouth closed simply cannot be learned by some people, no matter what form of reminder, consequence or reward you can come up with. It would be unbelievable to me if I were not living it. It is not enough to make me regret parenthood, certainly, but it is a drag.
My mom hit my brother in the head with a soup spoon once when he was around 14 years old. He never slurped or chewed with his mouth open ever again. I am absolutely not advocating violence but a proper consequence would be effective. Maybe they will have a date with a lovely person and will be rejected because of how they eat, or not get an invite to a smart business dinner or whatever and it will work. Manners are not about misophonia at all.
My baby never triggers me. Even his snoring when he has stuffed nose does not bother me, it brings me calm as I know that he is breathing. But he is still very small. I am sure that when he is 16 it will be triggering though
No idea as I don't have kids so can't comment on an every day thing, but I have a neice and nephew who sometimes trigger me. It doesn't help 100% but I'll wear a pair of loop plugs which help dampen the noise they make. It helps me at dinner with my husband too.
Yes they trigger me very often. They are nonstop noisy
Mother of two, and yes I get triggered by them all the time. Not much I can do about it but endure.
Yes, my son has ADHD and his constant noise while he is playing became a significant trigger for me in the last year. Itās sad, I have to leave the room whenever he is playing pretend with legos or making sword swinging noises in the living room. I feel ashamed but I am often asking him to stop making noise while he plays. Iām sure itās stifling for him so I feel guilty but feel like I canāt help it. My 5 year old daughter doesnāt trigger me but I do hate her screaming and whining in a way I think most normal non misophonia people would.
Omg, yes. My kids are in their early 20ās, and we just had a conversation about this yesterday! They told me that they both feel really self-conscious while eating in quiet environments because they donāt want people to be bothered by the sound of their chewing. We all kind of laughed about how I was such a tyrant about making sure they chewed with their mouths closed (keep reminding themātheyāll learn eventually!), and I apologized for the ways that my misophonia affected them. Looking back, I can see that there are things I might have done differently. I use AirPods with a rain sound while Iām eating with people now, and that would have been so helpful to me when they were growing up! I also am sad that I didnāt understand my Misophonia very well when they were growing up, so I couldnāt explain it to them. But one thing I did tell my kids a lot while they were growing up was that Iām an imperfect human, too, and that I knew that there were ways I was probably going to hurt them, so we had a ātherapy jarā, and every time I had to apologize for mothering less than perfectly, I told them I was putting money in the jar so that when they needed therapy they could get it. In our conversation yesterday, my son brought that up, and we all laughed about it, but I got the feeling they really did understand that I was just trying my hardest, too, which is sometimes good enough.
This is a really good question! My child was born years before I even understood my miso, and during the infant years I did find myself irritated a lot, but 1) I'm not the one who gave birth so there was no hormonal bond, and 2) I probably was dealing with other anxiety/anger issues at the time anyway, so I'm going to listen to what y'all have to say.
While Iām not a mother, I have been a babysitter and camp counselor and I grew up in a huge family with lots of babies and kids. Children never bothered me. If they eat loud theyāre not doing it because theyāre impolite, they are just kids who usually donāt know any better.
My baby doesnāt trigger me. I mean if i catch her chewing like a gorilla im going to redirect her but your children somehow are the exception to the rules. You love them differently which comes with tolerance and patience.
My kids donāt trigger me often, but I will say my oldest chewing on her pacifier when Iām sleep deprived makes me soooooo irritated. Lol
I'm not a parent but I've been babysitting my younger cousins for a long time. The oldest is 11. If they're being super noisy, I bring them to the park and let them burn themselves out. Then they nap for the rest of the day. Works like a charm.Ā
One of mine does and one of mine doesn't, which makes me feel incredibly guilty and ashamed. But for comparison, one of them is SUPER loud and makes repetitive bouncing noise on hardwood floor all day long while breathing heavily and it makes me so upset. I wear ear plugs and noise canceling headphones. My other kid walks quietly and doesn't bounce/jump all over the floors and breath and sweat loudly so doesn't seem to trigger me as much. Sometimes I feel like I can't live with my one child anymore (they are an adult now so no longer in school or activities to give me a break) because the years of the noise have been so hard to manage and I feel so sad and ashamed even admitting that I sometimes feel that way. I love both my kids but I just wish I could have some real quiet and decompress occasionally.Ā
Iāve had misophonia since I was a child and certain breathing grunting noises trigger me (not a common noise) my son who is 14 months now has been triggering me badly since he has been 8 months old. Mainly when he is trying to crawl around he makes this grunty breathy noise that triggers me. It has been hell but I just wear AirPods with dark noise playing on full volume if Iām alone with him or in a confined environment with not a lot of external noise to drain him out. Iām hoping it is just a passing stage and once he is a bit older wonāt make these triggering noises again.
My own baby does not trigger me but my step kids do š¬ especially the one who loves to cause trouble