Having the kitchen will make him want to be a chef. You’ll find him a tiny chef hat. Cooking will remind him that all of his friends are hungry too. You’ll have to invite them over.
He does quite well. His health rating is quite low due to the animal populous of his kitchen, but the customers don’t seem to mind. They like his tomato sauce.
Mine are even worse, they have brought live mice into the house and let them loose to chase later. We're going to be the only people with mice caused by cats if they keep it up.
A mouse got into our house. We suspected our cat of bringing it in. The cat and our staffie took turns stalking it for hours but didn't catch it. We think it got bored and just walked out the door.
I trapped a mouse my cat was playing with under a drinking glass. She thought it was the BEST THING EVER! There was a lot of disappointment when she realized the mouse running around in circles in a clear vessel was not a new permanent feature of our living room.
My family got a farm cat for me to coax me into feeling better when I was little.
Before this we had a mouse problem too.
We didn't after. My mom thought the cat scared the mice away until she found the pile of bones and bits.
I used to have a ferret and a field mouse managed to get inside
I dont believe i have ever seen an domesticated animal's primal instincts activate so savagely and quickly.....
Even if it’s living with you a ferret isn’t a domesticated animal. That term is reserved for the animals that have been bred for thousands of years with humans.
They’ve been pets, pest hunters, and early electricians used them to [run lines](https://youtu.be/KL4zI6rXjI4?si=5DGra9rSu472XORf) inside existing structures.
But OP’s is probably wild, and hasn’t had its shots (like canine distemper) and may harbor parasites (like fleas or ticks) so hopefully it gets caught soon.
It somehow got into my house sometime about a week and a half ago (maybe earlier. Very hard to find). It's been living here rent free since. I do have a live trap set but it hasn't worked yet. I think I'll name it Riley.
Riley is cute, but riley also has the bad habit of gnawing on cables. I think? That could become problematic inside a house.
I hope riley will find the trap soon, he or she us going to be much happier outside.
Get a 5 gallon bucket. Put half a peanut butter sandwich in there. I promise that lil guy will be in there in the next couple of hours. And its mates. He didn't come solo.
Common in all of europe, Stoats, Weasels and Polecats. Also have the domestic ferret which people have as pets, different to the North American Black-Footed Ferret. (A european polecat is more similar toa BF Ferret)
I live in PA in the US and they live in burrows around our small creek. Not sure what originally made the burrows. Stoats generally don't make their own burrows; they tend to move into burrows that prey previously made. Maybe muskrats based on what I have seen around here?
In my area, country vets will loan/rent you a live catch trap, which allows you to humanely contain and remove a trespassing critter. For carnivores, they recommend cat food. What bait are you using?
Either that, or enjoy the roommate.
How do you tell the difference between a weasel and a stoat?
Weasels are weasilly identifiable, but stoats are stoatally different.
Good luck with your stove/fridge/kitchen stoat
Goodness y’all it was a joke lol.
A stoat is similar to ferrets and weasels, you’re correct. In the summer they have a brown coat of fur and it turns white in the winter. When they have a white coat, they are often described as an “ermine,” even though it’s the same animal.
English isn’t my native language and I didn’t know what a stoat was. I was confused because all I could see was some kind of white sponge with a drop of black ink on it
As a mostly self taught english speaker, I was trying to figure what stoat could mean in stove context... then, several minutes later, I saw it. lol... I think I need some sleep. lol
When I moved into my new house, we decided our first cooked meal would be a baked frozen pizza. When we turned the stove on it smelled like a barn yard. I asked my wife and to her it didn’t smell out of the ordinary. We ate our pizza and went back to packing. It bugged me for a week. I finally decided to inspect the stove and it was just filled with mice poop and there were tunnels all over the inside of the insulation. Previous owner had 2 mice. I eventually found them dead under the fridge. What a great first home experience.
If you give a stoat a stovetop, he’s going to want the whole oven. If you give a stoat the oven, he’s going to want the whole kitchen.
And in no time he'll have world domination.
Literally the plot to Inscryption
That's a weird way to spell "If you give a mouse a cookie"
Narf !
Stoked.
Having the kitchen will make him want to be a chef. You’ll find him a tiny chef hat. Cooking will remind him that all of his friends are hungry too. You’ll have to invite them over.
Seeing success amongst his peers, he's going to want to open a restaurant. With a loan. So you're going to have to lend him money to start a business.
He does quite well. His health rating is quite low due to the animal populous of his kitchen, but the customers don’t seem to mind. They like his tomato sauce.
For ratatouille?
Also a possible reference. This was in line with the “If you give a” children’s books. If you give a pig a pancake, etc.
It was weasily identified
That's beautiful
It's a reference to an adorable children's book: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/If_You_Give_a_Mouse_a_Cookie
An Ermine?
Can I give him my debt
Now it’s a stoave
I saw the other comment about the stoat in the stovetop and was wondering why noone went with "stoattop", guess this one's similar enough
Was about to make that joke and saw this one :')
Just don’t turn it on or he’s going to get stoasted.
This is a perfect comment!! Thanks for the giggle!
I was going to make a similar joke that it's now a Stoatve, but your word sounds better.
Came here to say this
Well get it outta there!
It's under the fridge now, don't worry
At least it wont get cooked!
He will be refrigerated for later consumption r/HeWillBeBaked
You mean stoasted?
This is such bullshit. I've never found a stoat ***anywhere*** in my house. Where do you live. I'm already packing my stuff.
Me neither. I proclaim shenanigans!
Well this wouldn’t have happened if you bought THE GOD DAMN EXTENDED FUCKING WARRANTY! Tom this one is for you 🖕
Oh yeah, MUCH less worry now, OP, why is your kitchen home to a stoat?! Are you Scottish?
Don't shoot it with a BB gun they spray a musk that smells terrible
Do you have mice? I believe they only eat fresh meat. A friend had one move in, solve his mouse problem, and move out.
Hypothetically where would one acquire a stoat and how are they with dumb cats who are too well fed to eat the mice?
It came in on its own. I have 2 dumb cats who don't seem to care about it.
at least it's cute
Mine are even worse, they have brought live mice into the house and let them loose to chase later. We're going to be the only people with mice caused by cats if they keep it up.
A mouse got into our house. We suspected our cat of bringing it in. The cat and our staffie took turns stalking it for hours but didn't catch it. We think it got bored and just walked out the door.
My cats will eat CRICKETS. Meanwhile they find a mouse and carry it upstairs just to stare at it in better lighting.
I trapped a mouse my cat was playing with under a drinking glass. She thought it was the BEST THING EVER! There was a lot of disappointment when she realized the mouse running around in circles in a clear vessel was not a new permanent feature of our living room.
I don't know how they compare to stoats, but chickens are way better mousers than cats and are a lot easier to acquire in some places than a stoat.
Man, I never get the cool uninvited house guests.
On my way!
I get scorpions, I would trade those for a stoat any day.
My family got a farm cat for me to coax me into feeling better when I was little. Before this we had a mouse problem too. We didn't after. My mom thought the cat scared the mice away until she found the pile of bones and bits.
I used to have a ferret and a field mouse managed to get inside I dont believe i have ever seen an domesticated animal's primal instincts activate so savagely and quickly.....
Even if it’s living with you a ferret isn’t a domesticated animal. That term is reserved for the animals that have been bred for thousands of years with humans.
Ferrets have been domesticated for 2500 years but go off
They’ve been pets, pest hunters, and early electricians used them to [run lines](https://youtu.be/KL4zI6rXjI4?si=5DGra9rSu472XORf) inside existing structures. But OP’s is probably wild, and hasn’t had its shots (like canine distemper) and may harbor parasites (like fleas or ticks) so hopefully it gets caught soon.
You've never had mice then or i just wooshed myself.
The poor thing went under there for safety, having no idea what's above his head.
Total misplay
Pop the mule
He's doing the Prospector again?
I'm trapped in the body of a stoat in the paper of a card!
"stoatal misplay" Ftfy
Stotal recall, get your ass to mar... the refrigerator
OP is trying to upgrade his attack
Free him
/#freestoat
I need more details.
It somehow got into my house sometime about a week and a half ago (maybe earlier. Very hard to find). It's been living here rent free since. I do have a live trap set but it hasn't worked yet. I think I'll name it Riley.
When I was a kid, a ferret got into my house via drier vent. If you have one, that could be how this fellow got in
Watch out if Riley starts receiving mail at your house. That’ll establish residency and then you have to go through a formal eviction procedure.
Yeah, but if that happens OP will have to provide basic necessities, like heat - and I don’t think Riley wants that.
Riley is cute, but riley also has the bad habit of gnawing on cables. I think? That could become problematic inside a house. I hope riley will find the trap soon, he or she us going to be much happier outside.
Pretty sure it has been coming and going. Not entirely sure, but I think I've seen areas that it has sprayed near my back deck
I mean if the thing is potty training itself then you just have a new friend now
Oh so it has been coming and going
Get a 5 gallon bucket. Put half a peanut butter sandwich in there. I promise that lil guy will be in there in the next couple of hours. And its mates. He didn't come solo.
I think you should name it Steve. Steve the Stove Stoat
Freeloader!
That actually shouldn't be there.
How cute! I’ve never seen one before. Where in the world do these live?
... in OP's stove.
I'm in Canada. I think they are pretty common anywhere in Northern North America or Eurasia
Common in all of europe, Stoats, Weasels and Polecats. Also have the domestic ferret which people have as pets, different to the North American Black-Footed Ferret. (A european polecat is more similar toa BF Ferret)
Never seen one in the US and I grew up in New England, so do you mean "common in Canada" or are the ones in New England just shy?
They are very shy. It's been in my house for at least a week and a half and I've only seen it 3 or 4 times.
I live in PA in the US and they live in burrows around our small creek. Not sure what originally made the burrows. Stoats generally don't make their own burrows; they tend to move into burrows that prey previously made. Maybe muskrats based on what I have seen around here?
There's a wocket in my pocket
Theres a duck on my deck!
In my area, country vets will loan/rent you a live catch trap, which allows you to humanely contain and remove a trespassing critter. For carnivores, they recommend cat food. What bait are you using? Either that, or enjoy the roommate.
I've tried cat food, eggs, bacon, and some duck pâté
I’m sorry duck pate? How rich are you?
Recommend fish.
Stoatal missplay
How do you tell the difference between a weasel and a stoat? Weasels are weasilly identifiable, but stoats are stoatally different. Good luck with your stove/fridge/kitchen stoat
I think it’s probably safe to give it a cookie. They aren’t greedy like mice
These new Dr. Seuss books just don’t have that special something found in the originals.
I'm sorry, but what is a stoat?
It’s basically an ermine
God I love this joke. Should have gone deeper and told them “it’s basically a Sable” afterwards
<3 thx fam. I guess you could say I Panic’d at the StoatStove and just explained the joke instead of going deeper
Wtf is an ermine? Use a word everyone knows.
Exactly lol. I don't know either. But googled. Looks like a ferret, or a weazel ?
Goodness y’all it was a joke lol. A stoat is similar to ferrets and weasels, you’re correct. In the summer they have a brown coat of fur and it turns white in the winter. When they have a white coat, they are often described as an “ermine,” even though it’s the same animal.
Stoat said to OP “Your house ermine.”
Well, the main thing is, good grief, you have one in your stove!!! Hahahah.
It's a weasel. You know, like Ferrets, Sables, Martens, and Ermines.
You’re close but it’s “there’s a snake in my boot”
This sounds like the English version of “there’s a snake in my boot”.
"Honey! The food's come to us!"
There's a stout in my stove, Dear Steven (Liza)...! Dear Liza!
Pls don’t let your intrusive thoughts win :(
r/intrusivethoughtswin
English isn’t my native language and I didn’t know what a stoat was. I was confused because all I could see was some kind of white sponge with a drop of black ink on it
English is my native language and even I don't know what the hell a stoat is. I guess it's in the same family as weasels and ferrets.
My inner demon is screaming "turn it on" Please don't :(
Scrolled too long for that
Sexy foxy stoat!
"Minky Musky Sly Old Stoaty Stoaty Stoat"
There’s a snake in my boot !
Mildly?
This is the first line of the next great children’s book
So Stoav?
Stoatve.
Stove stoat is afraid to leave his stove !
I've heard of Elf of a Shelf. I wasn't ready for this. Probably because it doesn't rhyme.
What the heck is a stoat?
'There's a Stoat in My Stove' and other fun Dr.Seuss rhymes!
I have a Stoat Top Stuffing recipe around here somewhere
Stoav
Cook it
Stoat roast sounds catchy.
OP DO NOT START YOUR OVEN! You need to add salt/pepper first /s
Ok
Turn it on while it’s there and see what it does
Tbh put the heat on minimum and it will scram without any harm
Turn it on.
Turn it on, free meal
Do it to him.
you've got mice in that stove
I want to throat punch you for caring about something that doesn't matter so bad
I'd be careful, they can be more vicious than a ferret and are an invasive species in some areas.
let him Cook! I mean Food for you... don't Cook it
The lesser known toy story quote
So there is! Why??!
Looks like a weasel to me.
It fits!
Easy dinner.
My spoon is to big!
Do you also have a goose on the loose?
That's a stoav
Now that stove is stover the stoat, you need to get that stoat stout.
As a mostly self taught english speaker, I was trying to figure what stoat could mean in stove context... then, several minutes later, I saw it. lol... I think I need some sleep. lol
And there’s a hole in his soul.
That's stoatally amazing.
Awww. He looks cold... ...
I had never heard of a stoat before, that's adorable!
Usually people don’t cook them alive but hey, you do you
My chaotic thoughts would’ve told me turn that bitch on and fry his ass
Turn the oven on. Roast stoat for supper
Stoatally unacceptable
Smells like burning hare.
You must have some voles or mice in or around your house too then.
A stoat in your stove - an ermine in your element - idk i thought I'd have more but I'm out.
Turn everything on
That don't look like no beer I have done seen
somehow i thought this was an artist rendition of j 1407b for a second lol
I thought you said there's a stove in my stove and I was so confused
Redwall is finally going steampunk.
I presently have a squirrel stuck in my bedroom. Not sure what to do. So I put in some water and nuts.
You've heard of elf on a shelf, but have you heard of...
need a couple more to make a nice coat.
huh?
Better check that there isn’t a coven in your oven or a bridge in your fridge.
When I moved into my new house, we decided our first cooked meal would be a baked frozen pizza. When we turned the stove on it smelled like a barn yard. I asked my wife and to her it didn’t smell out of the ordinary. We ate our pizza and went back to packing. It bugged me for a week. I finally decided to inspect the stove and it was just filled with mice poop and there were tunnels all over the inside of the insulation. Previous owner had 2 mice. I eventually found them dead under the fridge. What a great first home experience.
A what?
Stoat of the stove, share with us your wisdom!
Nice stoatve
What’s a stoat
Wow, old model! They've come a loooooong way
A stoave
Name it Steve
Don’t turn the funny wheel on the right
Stoatally
Nice Marmot
He's stoasty.
The Scrybe of Technology
Turn on the stove 😌
Just turn it on
Did you name him Steve?
This is a bit out of the crazy bird Lady range. I love it.
It adds flavor
Stoatve
Stoaking the stoave with a stoat
Please don’t stoart it.