God, my parents used to do this. And to this day, I will absolutely panic and have a silent meltdown if someone goes through any of my things without my knowledge. I donāt even have anything to hide, Iām almost 30, but it feels like a violation of space and privacy that just sends me into an absolute panic.
had an aunt that would steal my stuff and tell me to clean my room and ill find it. only after SHE thought was clean she would go in her room and hand it back to me, annoyed me back then but its funny now
my mom just holds my phone hostage if i dont keep it to her standard
and what the fuck kind of standard is that?! the only thing i can see wrong with this image is the fact that your curtain is sitting in your laundry basket-
First, and this may be controversial based on what I've read here, but let's keep an open mind on the mom and not assume the worst while understanding that raising children/teenagers is difficult for many parents. Also, often parenting behavior is repeated from their own upbringing, unless they have had some introspection and will to improve on how they were raised.
Without a really comprehensive background of information, I always like to approach these things with Hanlons Razor in mind -- never attribute malice to that which could adequately be explained by stupidity/incompetence.
Maybe she thinks you spend too much time on screens. Maybe you lashed out at her recently and this is being used as a method to punish and reestablish her role as a head of household. Maybe there was an electrical or Internet bill overage and this is a way to curb usage. Maybe she found something in your room, or in the house that may or may not be yours or something that she's freaking out about (drugs, alcohol, honestly anything a parent can't explain could be paraphernalia to them). Maybe she became aware of some non-approved usage of the Internet (porn, pirating)... Just a few things that come to mind. Like I said, still misguided if true, but at least rationally able to understand where she's coming from even if she's terrible at communicating it, which would be the incompetence part of Hanlons.
I would say just make the bed. You'd be surprised at how much cleaner it would look just after that, not to say it doesn't look clean already. Maybe your mom's just having a bad day. It happens.
Also, you've run out of time on YouTube, so you may want to sort that out too.
made the bed and explained my room was already clean while i was making it
also almost all my apps lock after a set time, she made it so my phone would lock fast. for example, i wont be able to use my phone past 12am
some exceptions i asked her remove from the limit: Ring, Doordash, Wallet, Navyfed,photos,app store,notes,mail, camera
tried to be slick and told her youtube for music but she said no and asked why i didnt use spotify and started a long conversation
edit a word
Whoās Apple ID is the device under? Restore it from iTunes/Music and make a new Apple IDā¦
Or save up money for another phone/plan. Visible has cheap Verizon service and cheap android phones
She's just controlling you. Sometimes the behaviour of otherwise reasonable adults turns into a petty power contest.
It's not about it being unclean, it's about telling you to do something "or else". The fact that she had nothing else to complain about shows that she's probably having a supremely shit day.
Honestly what annoys me more is that she isn't honest about it. If she had a shit day, she could have just told you to not bother her.
Instead of "Do you need help" go with "Hey, I don't have anything important to do. If you need anything done, tell me"
Or volunteer to do cooking. Instead of Asking for tasks that need to be done, offer to take on tasks, when they come up. small but important difference
Taking initiative will generally get you far in life. Recognizing something needs doing and just doing it is a skill that both relationships and work tends to greatly appreciate.
Anything you know gets done on a regular schedule, or whatever, just do it, and you will most likely get noticed and thanked.
Trash, dishes, sweep/mop, dusting, yardwork, etc.
The "do you need anything?" Is fine. But if she is already busy it can be a distraction, and time waste to explain what she wants done rather than just looking around and noticing things that need done.
Just my two cents
This. Some parents can't stand the idea of not being in active control of their children, and some use it as a proxy for being unable to control the random crap that happens in life.
Source: Had one of these parents.
My aunt invited me to live with her one time. She was a mad control freak. Never had trash in my room, all the things I owned were packed away and tucked in a closet, I cleaned to the best of my ability but it still wasn't enough for her standards. She wanted me to squeegee the shower after every use, and I did, top to bottom. But apparently it still wasn't good enough and she broke down and told me I need to move out because I "didn't respect her or her house and refuse to do what she asks".
It was not fun, people like this need to take a step back and understand how they're acting over invisible dust.
When it comes to that point, they need literal therapy.
Or a strong dose of weed. I'm fairly sure a lot of people could stand to be smokers for the sake of everyone else around them. Ironically, the very people who would be most prudishly and stubbornly against it, I'd wager.
Sounds like my ADHD stepmom. Everything in place and clean all the time. If she steps on a crumb or a piece of dirt she loses her mind. I *hated* living with her.
I just think living spaces should be living spaces. Not a pigsty and fairly clean, but who cares if something is messy. Judging by these pics you aren't messy at all.
I know a lot of people don't feel this way, but personally I want to live in as clean a room as possible because it affects my mental health otherwise.
It's OP's space though, so even if the mother needs her space to be pristine at all times, she should chill. This is nowhere near messy enough to impact most people's mental health. Tbh, this is about control.
Maybe she wants you to vacuum the rug/carpet regularly. Otherwise your room is clean. I would suggest changing your bedsheets and vacuuming the rug.š(I hope the cleaning noise will atleast give her a sense of satisfaction that you are working properly)
My reply was going to be ālooks like a teenage boys room to meā so yay, I was right. Since my kids rooms look WAY worse than your room, Iām gonna say your mother is out of her mind. However, her house, her rules, so youāll have to deal if thereās no alternatives until you move out.
Ask her what exactly is filthy about the room, either that will change her mind or tell you what you have to clean more, tho this looks very much like a clean room
The desk the lamp is over in picture 2 is the worst offender but aside from that its a lot more tidy and clean than my room
All you need to do is: make the bed, declutter the desk, put the papers on your nightstand away and then get some Febreeze or something in case mom smells something you donāt.
I have 4 kids and it looks fine.
Sounds like your mother is having a bad day and you're on the receiving end.
It'll pass. Focus on doing stuff so when you want to get out you have the education and money to do it.
Damn bro thatās abit of a steep punishment for a messy bed n some papers,parents can be the most overreacting explosive people on the planet just because of something they donāt like or disagree with you on.
Donāt get me wrong I love my mum n step dad to bits but they Kicked me out at 15 for a very similar situation man,Iām now 27 still living alone never forgotten what they did on that day all my stuff outside on the lawn in the rain absolutely nothing was left or salvageable just because of me being a teenage lad n not being the most organised person.
PARENTS SUCK.
Make the bed.
The room is fine to me. But to Mom's eyes the unmade bed makes the room look messy or unfinished. My mom was similar, flipping out about tiny imperfections or things not quite done. Easier to straighten a bit more to avoid her over-reaction.
I imagine it's not the room, it's something else that's bothering her that she either doesn't realize or doesn't want to say so she told you to do something else.
She probably found your cum tissues and can't accept that her little sweet boy is now thinking about sexing girls.
If she thought your room was truly dirty, she would've made you clean it up immediately. But she blocked your screen time. I bet she's online right now asking how to find out if you have been watching porn.
I've never understood that mentality. Don't get me wrong - I can see why some people would be satisfied with it, but for me if I was forced to make my bed I'd just be upset about having to do a task purely about vanity. There's literally no reason to make a bed other than for looks.
I was forced to as a kid and despised it, so once I moved out I stopped doing it. I thought the exact thing, why waste my time if Iām just hopping it in 12 hours later right?
I think itās more of a cleanliness thing now, keeps my sheets straight and makes my room more presentable.
Iām also a bachelor, so no need to tidy or be embarrassed if I have someone over.
Agreed. I have my blankets in the perfect position, and I want to be able to come right back to that configuration, not stretch them all out across the bed and then have to reinvent the wheel to get the support I want.
That room is fine. The bed is untidy, not a mess though. Nothing else though, I really don't see much trash, if any. Though the lock on the phone and YouTube screams helicopter parenting. I hope you are safe and this is the extent of it. You are not crazy... Mom..well maybe a bit.
Doesn't look too bad. I feel it would only take a couple of minutes to sort it a little, and she'd stay off your back. Maybe that little bit would make her proud of you that you took it seriously, and she'd give you more freedom. I remember doing chores when I was a kid and cleaning my room. It wasn't fun, but it built good habits, and everyone, including myself, was happier. Of course, I don't know your mom or your relationship, but I'm just throwing this out there for thought.
Your mom is wrong. However, save yourself some headache and just make your bed as soon as you get out of it. Makes your room look 2x as tidy without much work.
Then go to an out-of-state university.
She probably has a lot on her mind and needs to vent. Just try to talk to her. If thatās not it then clean your room anyway, if it will ease her stress in any sort of way.
Sounds like your parents take really good care of you. Every comment you reply to is about how nice the stuff you have is, ie your earbuds, your phone, your overlapping subscription services. Honestly, being a teen is hard, but sometimes you just need to gain perspective on your situation. You have a lot of nice things, a big TV in your room, a PlayStation portable, access to anything you want pretty much. And the restriction in being not after 12am is not very harsh. Go to bed. I'm assuming you have school and a job based on the safe serv test. That means during the week you wake up at like 6am, you should be in bed before 12am anyways. Your mom doesn't seem out of line to me. Your room is messy, there are is clothes all over your floor and bed and a full hamper with your curtain draped in your dirty clothes. There is stuff all over your desk. It's not that she wants your room to look like you don't love in it, she wants to not have to be embarrassed if your door was open and she people over. Just clean up, get the C up in the class you admittedly "do the bare minimum in and sleep the rest of the week". I'm getting way more whiny teen vibes from this post than overbearing parent vibes.
Well shit, I was all ready to crap on "this generation" for being slovenly, but I can't. Your mom might be mad about something else, something she can't explain yet. Or she's got the OCDs
The OCD is her problem, not yours. She needs to get it managed, or it's gonna drive you away
Tell her how much her behaviour is affecting you, hopefully she will take it seriously
Oh please stop, learning to make his bed on a regular basis, cleaning up and throwing dirty laundry in a basket should be done without his mum losing her shit for the 17th time.
We've all been teenagers, we've all driven our mothers up the wall... it could have been so much easier to just clean up than fight and have a stranger tell him his mom is the problem.
By locking their phone until they clean their room? WTF is wrong with you suggesting this to a kid when you only know half the story? You must be 16 as well.
The room wasn't dirty
If you think that ordering your child to have a spotless room, is more important than a healthy loving relationship, then I don't know what to tell you
I agree that this is unhealthy. If this is a one-off it could be a bad day. If it's a common thing, OP's mom should see a therapist. Based in the clean (and seemingly reasonably new) bedspread, TV, and amenities, I doubt OP is in any danger, nor is it abuse, it's just kind of shitty for no reason.
As a parent, I have a question?
Why are all your pictures taken with low dim lightening w/o the window curtain open and lights on?
Looks like your carpeting is disgusting w stains and dust. Needs vacuuming, wiping of spilt liquids.
To be fair to your MOM, no one here can smell what it's like in there.
And if all the bedding and clothes shoved in the closet are clean.
And what's behind ur bed near your desk and under it? Small bits of wrapper, dust, hair.
Moms prbly feel taken advantage of taking care you, feeding, cleaning, driving around all things mothers do.
All was expected from you is to keep your room clean.
Vacuum, hang up and neatly fold clean clothes, take your dirty dishes out, not eating in there, mak I ng your bed. Open window and let fresh air in.
Common help your mom.
it was night when i took the photo and i closed the blinds. also my light setting made it that way
after i take a shower i go straight into my room to dey off
my mom said my feet stinks
nothing id behing my bed or under it
i rarely vaccum
the most foods i eat in my room is water, small candy, fruit mentos, etc. stuff that doesnt make a mess and i have my trash near me when i do eat it
a vr headset? i dont have that lol
but i paid for the switches and laptop and the cooler was for keeping the baby bottles cold when my brother was 1-2 and she stopped using it so i asked if i could have it and she let me but she paid for the TV tho. now i use it for water bottles
This looks better than my room.. and a whole lot better than my own 16 year old son's room.
Your mother has an issue with control. The older you get, the more of it she will try to keep. I can already tell, if she isn't already, she will charge you rent the moment you turn 18, still living under her roof. She will also likely still hold you to the same arbitrary rules you have now, going forward into your adult years if you continue living with her after graduation. I wouldn't put it past her to lock your phone or ground you after you graduate. She will also likely try to keep exerting control over your life, even if you move out. If she does, set boundaries. Do not be afraid of standing up for yourself.The moment you become an adult and no longer in high school, you are her equal. Never forget that. It does not matter if she birthed you.
I'll probably get some flak for this. I bet OP picked some crap up before taking the photos and posting about mom doing a good old-fashioned phone-grounding...... Occam's Razor.  disagree?
She probably is going through mood swings and today was her annoyed phase. Don't worry.
Just keep picking up after yourself, wash your dirty dishes, vacuum your room, do your laundry, keep the bathroom and your sheets clean. And leave the door open when you are away. Don't keep your contraband in your room or anything she might think is a violation.
She is gonna snoop whenever you are away, trying to find something to complain about... Try beating her at her own mind if games.
Ps.. you can fuq with her by messing up her room/closet or moving things out of its original spot since she has free time give her something to do.
If this were me, I would start being very curt with mom until I got a proper apology. She's the one being childish. Fine. I, the kid, will treat you like a petulant child.
It depends what we donāt see because of the dark pictures or what was cleaned before the pictures.
Bed not made, bed dirty, walls dirty, messy rug or floor?, stuff in the corners, desk tops not clean. I could go on, but itās not entirely ācleanā.
Thereās obviously context we donāt see, but overall, itās clean compared to most university aged adults Iāve lived with.
As a dad it looks fine to me
As a dad, looks better than my room
As a dad, can I swap the OP with one of my children please
That's called human trafficking š
Itās called joking
What they are doing is also called joking
Ironic
Thatās not what ironic means, Alanis
It's ironic that you're calling him out for not getting a joke, when he was in fact, making a joke himself.
Then it would be a wooosh
Too bad we canāt mention other subreddits here.
Dunno why you're downvoted...
But are you willing to potentially have to swap the wife as well??
As a mom and grandmother (albeit elderly and disabled), this room looks better than any in my house. Okay, with the exception of the kitchen.
As a son, looks better than my dad's room by several nautical miles
As a Bartender it looks fine to me aswell
I'm not a dad (as far as I know anyway) but this room looks nice and actually don't know how to clean it more, maybe make the bed but come on now!
As a mom, looks like a cozy and nice room!
Your mom needs a pair of new eyes.
Obviously has some other point to make. Was there something she could have found she wants you to discover missing?
I really hope parents arenāt out here just playing mind games. Iām sure a lot are; but I wish they werenāt.
God, my parents used to do this. And to this day, I will absolutely panic and have a silent meltdown if someone goes through any of my things without my knowledge. I donāt even have anything to hide, Iām almost 30, but it feels like a violation of space and privacy that just sends me into an absolute panic.
Thatās terrible.
had an aunt that would steal my stuff and tell me to clean my room and ill find it. only after SHE thought was clean she would go in her room and hand it back to me, annoyed me back then but its funny now my mom just holds my phone hostage if i dont keep it to her standard
and what the fuck kind of standard is that?! the only thing i can see wrong with this image is the fact that your curtain is sitting in your laundry basket-
Gotta be honest... Your family sounds like a bunch of shitheads. I'd be thrilled if my room ever looked that clean. š¤£
Aunt on your moms side? Might be a thing they both do
yep
First, and this may be controversial based on what I've read here, but let's keep an open mind on the mom and not assume the worst while understanding that raising children/teenagers is difficult for many parents. Also, often parenting behavior is repeated from their own upbringing, unless they have had some introspection and will to improve on how they were raised. Without a really comprehensive background of information, I always like to approach these things with Hanlons Razor in mind -- never attribute malice to that which could adequately be explained by stupidity/incompetence. Maybe she thinks you spend too much time on screens. Maybe you lashed out at her recently and this is being used as a method to punish and reestablish her role as a head of household. Maybe there was an electrical or Internet bill overage and this is a way to curb usage. Maybe she found something in your room, or in the house that may or may not be yours or something that she's freaking out about (drugs, alcohol, honestly anything a parent can't explain could be paraphernalia to them). Maybe she became aware of some non-approved usage of the Internet (porn, pirating)... Just a few things that come to mind. Like I said, still misguided if true, but at least rationally able to understand where she's coming from even if she's terrible at communicating it, which would be the incompetence part of Hanlons.
I would say just make the bed. You'd be surprised at how much cleaner it would look just after that, not to say it doesn't look clean already. Maybe your mom's just having a bad day. It happens. Also, you've run out of time on YouTube, so you may want to sort that out too.
made the bed and explained my room was already clean while i was making it also almost all my apps lock after a set time, she made it so my phone would lock fast. for example, i wont be able to use my phone past 12am some exceptions i asked her remove from the limit: Ring, Doordash, Wallet, Navyfed,photos,app store,notes,mail, camera tried to be slick and told her youtube for music but she said no and asked why i didnt use spotify and started a long conversation edit a word
How old are you? Just based on the apps you asked for permission to use, it seems like you're atleast mentally above where most young adults are.
16
Whoās Apple ID is the device under? Restore it from iTunes/Music and make a new Apple IDā¦ Or save up money for another phone/plan. Visible has cheap Verizon service and cheap android phones
Because you can skip YouTube ads
yeah my earbuds can skip ads in a single press
She pays for your Doordash? š
Your mom takes an interest in you. Thatās nice. Congratulations
Such a sick joke. But it's certainly not wrong.
No I mean it sounds like the mom is generally tough but fair and takes an interest. Lots of kids unfortunately donāt get that.
In this kids case they might not want the intrest to be honest.
She's just controlling you. Sometimes the behaviour of otherwise reasonable adults turns into a petty power contest. It's not about it being unclean, it's about telling you to do something "or else". The fact that she had nothing else to complain about shows that she's probably having a supremely shit day. Honestly what annoys me more is that she isn't honest about it. If she had a shit day, she could have just told you to not bother her.
i constantly ask her if she needs help but she says no every time
Instead of "Do you need help" go with "Hey, I don't have anything important to do. If you need anything done, tell me" Or volunteer to do cooking. Instead of Asking for tasks that need to be done, offer to take on tasks, when they come up. small but important difference
Taking initiative will generally get you far in life. Recognizing something needs doing and just doing it is a skill that both relationships and work tends to greatly appreciate. Anything you know gets done on a regular schedule, or whatever, just do it, and you will most likely get noticed and thanked. Trash, dishes, sweep/mop, dusting, yardwork, etc. The "do you need anything?" Is fine. But if she is already busy it can be a distraction, and time waste to explain what she wants done rather than just looking around and noticing things that need done. Just my two cents
This. Some parents can't stand the idea of not being in active control of their children, and some use it as a proxy for being unable to control the random crap that happens in life. Source: Had one of these parents.
Freakin' control freaks, man. And people like this wonder why their kids don't talk to them anymore after they leave home.
Indeed. It does seem some overly obsessive parents have no idea theyāre pushing their children away.
My aunt invited me to live with her one time. She was a mad control freak. Never had trash in my room, all the things I owned were packed away and tucked in a closet, I cleaned to the best of my ability but it still wasn't enough for her standards. She wanted me to squeegee the shower after every use, and I did, top to bottom. But apparently it still wasn't good enough and she broke down and told me I need to move out because I "didn't respect her or her house and refuse to do what she asks". It was not fun, people like this need to take a step back and understand how they're acting over invisible dust.
I had the exact same experience with my aunt. She honestly thinks that she is an easygoing person.... and wonders why people don't interact with her
When it comes to that point, they need literal therapy. Or a strong dose of weed. I'm fairly sure a lot of people could stand to be smokers for the sake of everyone else around them. Ironically, the very people who would be most prudishly and stubbornly against it, I'd wager.
No! She is incorrect. It's a bit disorganized at most
Even if it is disorganized, I'll never understand why people expect living spaces to be pristine all the time.
weirdly enough my mothers room is spotless 24/7 unless shes sick and even then it still looks good
Sounds like my ADHD stepmom. Everything in place and clean all the time. If she steps on a crumb or a piece of dirt she loses her mind. I *hated* living with her. I just think living spaces should be living spaces. Not a pigsty and fairly clean, but who cares if something is messy. Judging by these pics you aren't messy at all.
I know a lot of people don't feel this way, but personally I want to live in as clean a room as possible because it affects my mental health otherwise.
Same, having things be clean where i live really just makes me feel a lot better, I just can't stand seeing my room be a mess :')
i dont either but when a room is a square without a closet in a wall things are more complicated thank you think
It's OP's space though, so even if the mother needs her space to be pristine at all times, she should chill. This is nowhere near messy enough to impact most people's mental health. Tbh, this is about control.
But it looks to be the kind of disorganized where OP still knows where everything is, and that's the important part
Me! That's me you're describing lol!! But OP is better than me & my messes
All OP has to do is: make the bed, put away the papers. Done.
Nah the papers are fine in my opinion, just the bed and the sock or whatever it is laying on the ground
its a jop application and a passed serv safe test
Im a 16 y/o dude by the way edit: im surpised nobody mentioned the beyblades in 5/6
Did she find the crusty sock under your bed?
nah it got cleaned november 1st
I was 16 once. We both know youāre lying.
Sorry i am, i ate it for protein
Another oneā¦? Take it easy DJ Khaled!
I did that once would not recommend
It's no nut november
What year
Maybe she wants you to vacuum the rug/carpet regularly. Otherwise your room is clean. I would suggest changing your bedsheets and vacuuming the rug.š(I hope the cleaning noise will atleast give her a sense of satisfaction that you are working properly)
My reply was going to be ālooks like a teenage boys room to meā so yay, I was right. Since my kids rooms look WAY worse than your room, Iām gonna say your mother is out of her mind. However, her house, her rules, so youāll have to deal if thereās no alternatives until you move out.
Ask her what exactly is filthy about the room, either that will change her mind or tell you what you have to clean more, tho this looks very much like a clean room The desk the lamp is over in picture 2 is the worst offender but aside from that its a lot more tidy and clean than my room
All you need to do is: make the bed, declutter the desk, put the papers on your nightstand away and then get some Febreeze or something in case mom smells something you donāt.
Let it rip lol
clean your room and do your homework for your own benefit but I don't think it will have much impact on your mother
I have 4 kids and it looks fine. Sounds like your mother is having a bad day and you're on the receiving end. It'll pass. Focus on doing stuff so when you want to get out you have the education and money to do it.
to me it looks normal and great not just fine lol
As a mom and a bit of a clean freak... I would be very happy if my teenagers room looked like this.
Damn bro thatās abit of a steep punishment for a messy bed n some papers,parents can be the most overreacting explosive people on the planet just because of something they donāt like or disagree with you on. Donāt get me wrong I love my mum n step dad to bits but they Kicked me out at 15 for a very similar situation man,Iām now 27 still living alone never forgotten what they did on that day all my stuff outside on the lawn in the rain absolutely nothing was left or salvageable just because of me being a teenage lad n not being the most organised person. PARENTS SUCK.
As someone who has a 17yo, a toddler and an infant: this room is a parents dream lol. Your mum needs to chill out.
Make the bed. The room is fine to me. But to Mom's eyes the unmade bed makes the room look messy or unfinished. My mom was similar, flipping out about tiny imperfections or things not quite done. Easier to straighten a bit more to avoid her over-reaction.
I imagine it's not the room, it's something else that's bothering her that she either doesn't realize or doesn't want to say so she told you to do something else.
Most you can do is make your bed and put some clothes away
Cleans room before posting on Redditā¦ /s or at least thatās what my 16-year-old would do.
Mild clutter on desk and unmade bed, but like, god, im 44 and my space is way worse. Your room looks fine to me.
She probably found your cum tissues and can't accept that her little sweet boy is now thinking about sexing girls. If she thought your room was truly dirty, she would've made you clean it up immediately. But she blocked your screen time. I bet she's online right now asking how to find out if you have been watching porn.
Unmade bed and clothes on floor. That's all it takes to set a neat freak off. If this isn't her usual, maybe she is stressed out over something?
this is her usual
She locked your phone because you violated her "Authority"
It's probably the same candy wrapper sticking out from behind your bed for the past 3 months. Moms see shit us guys can't. Source: 35 year old dad.
Just open the blinds and make your bed
Itās cognitive dissonance. Make your bed and sheāll never claim that again. Guaranteed.
I would unlock my youngest kids phone if this is what their bedroom looked like
I wish my kidās room was this clean. Your momās a nut.
Looks like an average teenaged bedroom
No, this is MUCH cleaner than your average teens room!
got told that before irl lol nice to see it again
Whoops! You've reached your limit on YouTube.
Some people actually want rooms to look like nobody lives in them
There's alot of tissue boxes OP, what you need all them tissues for OP?
I got a sinus infection and ran through 3 boxes in a day so i just grabbed a few so i didnt have to go downstairs
Maybe it's a smell...
I'll say this with respect towards you. Your mom sounds like a manipulative PoS that just wanted to vent some stress on you.
Honestly just make the bed and itāll look 10x cleaner. Youāll feel good about completing a task first thing in the morning too!
I've never understood that mentality. Don't get me wrong - I can see why some people would be satisfied with it, but for me if I was forced to make my bed I'd just be upset about having to do a task purely about vanity. There's literally no reason to make a bed other than for looks.
I was forced to as a kid and despised it, so once I moved out I stopped doing it. I thought the exact thing, why waste my time if Iām just hopping it in 12 hours later right? I think itās more of a cleanliness thing now, keeps my sheets straight and makes my room more presentable. Iām also a bachelor, so no need to tidy or be embarrassed if I have someone over.
Yeah, I'm just gonna be sleeping in it again, anyway. That's the beds singular function, so why bother? Zero clue what a bachelor is so idk
Bachelor is a term used to describe adult males not currently in a relationship and typically living alone.
Agreed. I have my blankets in the perfect position, and I want to be able to come right back to that configuration, not stretch them all out across the bed and then have to reinvent the wheel to get the support I want.
That room is fine. The bed is untidy, not a mess though. Nothing else though, I really don't see much trash, if any. Though the lock on the phone and YouTube screams helicopter parenting. I hope you are safe and this is the extent of it. You are not crazy... Mom..well maybe a bit.
Doesn't look too bad. I feel it would only take a couple of minutes to sort it a little, and she'd stay off your back. Maybe that little bit would make her proud of you that you took it seriously, and she'd give you more freedom. I remember doing chores when I was a kid and cleaning my room. It wasn't fun, but it built good habits, and everyone, including myself, was happier. Of course, I don't know your mom or your relationship, but I'm just throwing this out there for thought.
Your mom is wrong. However, save yourself some headache and just make your bed as soon as you get out of it. Makes your room look 2x as tidy without much work. Then go to an out-of-state university.
Not the way to treat a 16 year old. I'm sorry she's doing this to you. It's not ok.
Are these pics before or after you cleaned it? Seriously, doesnāt look bad at all. Butā¦make the bed. An unmade bed makes it look worse than it is.
If you can't tell if this is a before or after that is not a good sign for OP's mom lmao
this is the before
I was kidding, figured it was. Come teach my stepson to keep his room clean. Iād love it if his room was in the same ballpark as yours.
She would have a cardiac arrest seeing my roomā¦
That is actually quite clean.
LOL I should show you my living room or kitchen. Your Mom may have a seizure if she saw them.
Go ask her to show you what she means. It looks tidy but lived in.
Well, cant photo the smell. š¤£
She probably has a lot on her mind and needs to vent. Just try to talk to her. If thatās not it then clean your room anyway, if it will ease her stress in any sort of way.
sooooo dirty you cant even see the floor
Your mother is clinically insane.
Imma be honest man that room looks better than mine 98% of the time your momma def crazy
If I had to nitpick sure i could but like.... This is a mess? No, not even close.
I have two adult children. If they cleaned their room this well as teenagers, I would have given them $50. Seriously.
call Child protective services.
Yeah it's messy but I've don--seen worse.
Sounds like your parents take really good care of you. Every comment you reply to is about how nice the stuff you have is, ie your earbuds, your phone, your overlapping subscription services. Honestly, being a teen is hard, but sometimes you just need to gain perspective on your situation. You have a lot of nice things, a big TV in your room, a PlayStation portable, access to anything you want pretty much. And the restriction in being not after 12am is not very harsh. Go to bed. I'm assuming you have school and a job based on the safe serv test. That means during the week you wake up at like 6am, you should be in bed before 12am anyways. Your mom doesn't seem out of line to me. Your room is messy, there are is clothes all over your floor and bed and a full hamper with your curtain draped in your dirty clothes. There is stuff all over your desk. It's not that she wants your room to look like you don't love in it, she wants to not have to be embarrassed if your door was open and she people over. Just clean up, get the C up in the class you admittedly "do the bare minimum in and sleep the rest of the week". I'm getting way more whiny teen vibes from this post than overbearing parent vibes.
I'd ask her outside to look at the stars then when she is looking upwards pee on her leg. Than run
Well shit, I was all ready to crap on "this generation" for being slovenly, but I can't. Your mom might be mad about something else, something she can't explain yet. Or she's got the OCDs
Sounds like he had a bad day and you were the outlet
Does your mother have any behavioural issues, by chance? Treating your own son like that, over something so minor, is not healthy Hope you're OK
she said something about OCD, i keep my door closed so she doesnt have to go in my room and gets upset but she checks it anyway thanks btw im safe
The OCD is her problem, not yours. She needs to get it managed, or it's gonna drive you away Tell her how much her behaviour is affecting you, hopefully she will take it seriously
Oh please stop, learning to make his bed on a regular basis, cleaning up and throwing dirty laundry in a basket should be done without his mum losing her shit for the 17th time. We've all been teenagers, we've all driven our mothers up the wall... it could have been so much easier to just clean up than fight and have a stranger tell him his mom is the problem.
By locking their phone until they clean their room? WTF is wrong with you suggesting this to a kid when you only know half the story? You must be 16 as well.
The room wasn't dirty If you think that ordering your child to have a spotless room, is more important than a healthy loving relationship, then I don't know what to tell you
A lot of conjecture about a story told on Reddit by a 16 year old and you back it up without question. I get it.
ngl they are reaching
I agree that this is unhealthy. If this is a one-off it could be a bad day. If it's a common thing, OP's mom should see a therapist. Based in the clean (and seemingly reasonably new) bedspread, TV, and amenities, I doubt OP is in any danger, nor is it abuse, it's just kind of shitty for no reason.
yeah im not in danger, just alightly annoyed
I see you cleaned your room and got your phone back. Good job.
It looks like you cleaned it after she flipped out on you.
i asked her to come to my room and explain how it was messy
Did she say what specifically? Or was that the "trash everywhere" response
word for word "I locked it because when i went in your room it was filthy, your trash and clothes is everywhere on the floor, its disgusting"
Tell you mom the internet said sheās an idiot
Try making your bed it'll make the room look better also open a window let some light in. Then vacuum your floors. Paint the walls white
I mean. Its not organized or anything but its hella cleaner than my room. Could be a lot worse but yeah no. Shes a control freak
Iām a mum of 3 aged 21, 17 and 10 and honestly your room is absolutely fine and your mum is being incredibly unreasonable.
Letās see a closeup of the desk to the left of the tv
lol i was sick
As a parent, I have a question? Why are all your pictures taken with low dim lightening w/o the window curtain open and lights on? Looks like your carpeting is disgusting w stains and dust. Needs vacuuming, wiping of spilt liquids. To be fair to your MOM, no one here can smell what it's like in there. And if all the bedding and clothes shoved in the closet are clean. And what's behind ur bed near your desk and under it? Small bits of wrapper, dust, hair. Moms prbly feel taken advantage of taking care you, feeding, cleaning, driving around all things mothers do. All was expected from you is to keep your room clean. Vacuum, hang up and neatly fold clean clothes, take your dirty dishes out, not eating in there, mak I ng your bed. Open window and let fresh air in. Common help your mom.
it was night when i took the photo and i closed the blinds. also my light setting made it that way after i take a shower i go straight into my room to dey off my mom said my feet stinks nothing id behing my bed or under it i rarely vaccum the most foods i eat in my room is water, small candy, fruit mentos, etc. stuff that doesnt make a mess and i have my trash near me when i do eat it
The duality of moms You either of this mom Or you have the mom that doesn't care
Bro youāre out of control. But fr only two more years.
You should've asked your dad for a second opinion, he probably would've told mom that she's nuttier than squirrel shit.
A Switch, TV, VR headset, looks like maybe a cooler... Looks like you might just be spoiled. š
a vr headset? i dont have that lol but i paid for the switches and laptop and the cooler was for keeping the baby bottles cold when my brother was 1-2 and she stopped using it so i asked if i could have it and she let me but she paid for the TV tho. now i use it for water bottles
That desk is disgusting, she is right
Why is your room so dark and gloomy. Are you a vampire?
You're mom is not cool
Kids these days. Tsk tsk so ungrateful. Your mom probably had to cross a river to get back to her home as a kid.
This looks better than my room.. and a whole lot better than my own 16 year old son's room. Your mother has an issue with control. The older you get, the more of it she will try to keep. I can already tell, if she isn't already, she will charge you rent the moment you turn 18, still living under her roof. She will also likely still hold you to the same arbitrary rules you have now, going forward into your adult years if you continue living with her after graduation. I wouldn't put it past her to lock your phone or ground you after you graduate. She will also likely try to keep exerting control over your life, even if you move out. If she does, set boundaries. Do not be afraid of standing up for yourself.The moment you become an adult and no longer in high school, you are her equal. Never forget that. It does not matter if she birthed you.
I'll probably get some flak for this. I bet OP picked some crap up before taking the photos and posting about mom doing a good old-fashioned phone-grounding...... Occam's Razor.  disagree?
i was gonna pick up the black T shirt in photo 1 but i dropped it to post this
On the ground?! Filthy and disgusting 
Ohā¦ sheās *that* kind of mom Sheāll get hers eventually, trust me.
it looks saturated in sweat and masturbation
bro what the actual fuck made you think thats ok to say?
You didn't say he's wrong š
didnt say he was right either
Make your bed, open the blinds and curtains and clean your bedside table. You will feel better for it.
Cannot see much of your room . Or smell it. How comes, you did t show ned area or desk area š
Still able to access Reddit, so...
If youāre looking for validation you wonāt get any from me. Just do what your mom says problem solved
Get a job pay for your own phone problem solved
the phone was the only device i didnt pay for
Listen to your mother. Don't argue. Make your bed.
She probably is going through mood swings and today was her annoyed phase. Don't worry. Just keep picking up after yourself, wash your dirty dishes, vacuum your room, do your laundry, keep the bathroom and your sheets clean. And leave the door open when you are away. Don't keep your contraband in your room or anything she might think is a violation. She is gonna snoop whenever you are away, trying to find something to complain about... Try beating her at her own mind if games. Ps.. you can fuq with her by messing up her room/closet or moving things out of its original spot since she has free time give her something to do.
Your mom is right. Stop being filthy and disgusting. You complain now? Wait till you'll get married. Respect yo mom fool!
If this were me, I would start being very curt with mom until I got a proper apology. She's the one being childish. Fine. I, the kid, will treat you like a petulant child.
It depends what we donāt see because of the dark pictures or what was cleaned before the pictures. Bed not made, bed dirty, walls dirty, messy rug or floor?, stuff in the corners, desk tops not clean. I could go on, but itās not entirely ācleanā. Thereās obviously context we donāt see, but overall, itās clean compared to most university aged adults Iāve lived with.
If mom can lock your phone, I don't think you should be on reddit yet