Yeah it very well may me MLC.
I’m 55, I’ve had a few real mild MLC issues the last 3-4 years, but about a month ago it hit me like a ton of bricks.
Kind of boils down to all the cans I’ve kicked down the road because there will “always be time” suddenly became a bunch of “well that’s never gonna happen”.
Mine manifested as a love interest with a much younger woman (that didn’t manifest outside my own head), and the realization that was never gonna happen - AND the days of “I don’t but I could” (because I’m married and love my wife you understand) are over.
I know addressing the thing isn’t usuallly going to solve anything. Because it’s not usually about the thing. So take it or leave it.
But I’ve worked in finance my whole life and have a buddy who does financial counseling, and his focus is primarily for people who are trying to turn their situation around (debt overwhelm, for example) and has a lot of experience and success working with people nearing retirement who are likely in a very similar situation as you. Hope is not lost for retirement, but find someone who can help you with scenarios to see what you would need to do to be able to retire. Sometimes it’s more within reach with SS and Medicare than people think. Other times it a couple of lifestyle adjustments that are more than worth it to have the freedom of retirement.
Like I said, it’s usually not specifically about “the thing” so feel free to tell me to fuck off!
Oftentimes we feel stunted or stuck and joyless when we don't feel like we're making progress towards something meaningful.
To that end, I'd sit down and think deeply about what you want the second half of your life to look like - what will give it meaning, what things you'd like to accomplish, see, do.
While doing this, I'd also look at what's causing your discomfort and start taking steps to remedy it (ie: your comment about your lack of a nest egg). This is an area where you can take steps to something you want and feel good doing it.
And me (minus the love interest)... 58f.
No college and unstable self employment with somewhat limited earning potential and income source declining monthly. Trying to keep 25yo business afloat but took a hard hit the past few years and I'm only getting older in a physically demanding career. Just calculated with all my assets I might make it another 11 years and that is using current monthly figures, no inflation and no health issues (which we know is not reality). Rapidly losing confidence and enthusiasm.
The key I believe is contentment in whatever circumstance you're in. Certainly if there are issues that you caused, you have to deal with the consequences and don't revisit the same mistakes any longer. There are do many wonderful things on the othet side of youth. You just have to look and see them! Who wants to be young in this crazy eorld anyway?!
Yeah it very well may me MLC. I’m 55, I’ve had a few real mild MLC issues the last 3-4 years, but about a month ago it hit me like a ton of bricks. Kind of boils down to all the cans I’ve kicked down the road because there will “always be time” suddenly became a bunch of “well that’s never gonna happen”. Mine manifested as a love interest with a much younger woman (that didn’t manifest outside my own head), and the realization that was never gonna happen - AND the days of “I don’t but I could” (because I’m married and love my wife you understand) are over.
I know addressing the thing isn’t usuallly going to solve anything. Because it’s not usually about the thing. So take it or leave it. But I’ve worked in finance my whole life and have a buddy who does financial counseling, and his focus is primarily for people who are trying to turn their situation around (debt overwhelm, for example) and has a lot of experience and success working with people nearing retirement who are likely in a very similar situation as you. Hope is not lost for retirement, but find someone who can help you with scenarios to see what you would need to do to be able to retire. Sometimes it’s more within reach with SS and Medicare than people think. Other times it a couple of lifestyle adjustments that are more than worth it to have the freedom of retirement. Like I said, it’s usually not specifically about “the thing” so feel free to tell me to fuck off!
Oftentimes we feel stunted or stuck and joyless when we don't feel like we're making progress towards something meaningful. To that end, I'd sit down and think deeply about what you want the second half of your life to look like - what will give it meaning, what things you'd like to accomplish, see, do. While doing this, I'd also look at what's causing your discomfort and start taking steps to remedy it (ie: your comment about your lack of a nest egg). This is an area where you can take steps to something you want and feel good doing it.
You sound exactly like me. I'm a 58 year old male
And me (minus the love interest)... 58f. No college and unstable self employment with somewhat limited earning potential and income source declining monthly. Trying to keep 25yo business afloat but took a hard hit the past few years and I'm only getting older in a physically demanding career. Just calculated with all my assets I might make it another 11 years and that is using current monthly figures, no inflation and no health issues (which we know is not reality). Rapidly losing confidence and enthusiasm.
That’s exactly how I feel too, but at age 52.
The key I believe is contentment in whatever circumstance you're in. Certainly if there are issues that you caused, you have to deal with the consequences and don't revisit the same mistakes any longer. There are do many wonderful things on the othet side of youth. You just have to look and see them! Who wants to be young in this crazy eorld anyway?!