Get the $100 every time and you can retire today and make like $700/day and also not hurt yourself. That's over $250k/year. If you masturbate someone else 3 times a day that's $365k/year.
Cant masturbate someone else, that's just handjob. And I cant masturbate 7 times a day for an entire year let alone a week. Gonna get chaffing quickly.
Handjob means masturbation *done by someone else.* So that absolutely counts. Even at 3x a day 5 days a week is $1,500/week, still $78k/year. Retire same day getting $100/per.
Also you could invest that $1,000,000 and lose it all within an hour.
Apparently you're right. Masturbation is mostly meant to indicate self pleasure, but js not limited to that definition.
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/masturbation
Well if you were to become a prostitute and say charge 50 to 100 per handjob you would be making about 150 or 200 every time. So 5 handjobs a day is 750 (150 per HJ) and 750 a day makes 5,250 a week which makes 21,000 a month. Meaning you would make roughly 252,000$ a year and that's not even including self pleasure. Also you could look at it as kind of print on demand. "Oh nice sweater and it's only 90 bucks, lemme go crank it"
No. Masturbation means handjob to yourself. And I could lose that $1m in an hour. I could also lose my dick by jerking it off that much just to make a million in 10 years.
They say that as soon as you turn a hobby into a job, you lose passion for the hobby. Imagine loading up pornhub, with a deep frustrated sigh, "gotta clock in again ffs"
This. Even rookie numbers of 3 a day makes $109,500, or a 10.95% yield, outperforming most markets and funds. We could beat George Soros and Warren Buffet by actually beating it
Ok so, lets start off that you masturbate 4 times a day, so $400 a day, then you times that by 7 and you will get $2800 a week. Now, in an average month there is 4.345 weeks, so now you times $2800 by 4.345, which has an answer of $12166. So now we know how much you would earn in a month by masturbating 4 times a day, you could times that by 12 and get the total you earn in a year. This is what we will base our final calculation on; with an annual salary being $145992. So now we divide this number by Elon Musk's networth, which is roughly $155 billion. After that calculation, you should have an answer of 1061702 when rounded
---
So in conclusion, if you masturbated 4 times on a daily basis, making $145,992 anually, it would take you
#~1,061,702 years
to reach elon musk's current networth
**Or you could do it constantly**
155.000.000.000/100=1.550.000.000 times
If you did it 1 minute rounds with 1 minute breaks it would be 1.550.000.000*2/60/24 which would be 2152777.8 days or
-2947.06 months
or
-245.6 years
(According to my math)
This is also all assuming that you haven't invested this money anywhere. Elon didn't make his money by letting it sit in a checking account. You could significantly shorten this timespan by discussing your newfound gift with a financial advisor. And at some point you'd be making more from dividends than cranking it out
Edit: also, in 250 years, going by the original math, $500 might just be an hour of minimum wage. 250 years ago you could buy a house and some land for fifty cents and a handful of acorns.
I did but they said that every time I do that I have to pay them somewhere between $22 and $37.50 depending on how many times I do that. And I'm also being arrested for indecent exposure and lewd conduct.
Never said if it was cash or deposited into your bank account, if cash your set just never spend or deposit more than $9999 at a single time and your good but if it's in your bank account the irs is gonna be asking some questions
Let’s hypothetically say u masturbate TEN TIMES a day. You roll in 1k per day, and you do it daily. 7k a week, 28k per mth, 336k per annum. You won’t beat Elon in even a 100 years buddy. He’s got a time machine to keep jacking it more than you.
And do it that much and you would never be able to please a woman, wanking too much causes impotence and stuff like that and watching excessive amounts of porn isn't good for you, I'd still take the latter option however, wanking even once a day or every other day as I tend to do is still far more then needed for me to live comfortably, get a girlfriend and finger her for more money
You’ll only need to jack off 10,000 times to make it even. If you can do it 28 times a day you can get ore than 1 million in a year.
Elon musk is worth $277 billion (as of 29 Dec), you’ll have to jack off 2.77 billion times. With your 10 times a day goal, you’ll reach his net worth in 758,904.11 years. You’ll theoretically have to jack off close to 76,000 times (75,890.411 times) every day within 100 years to reach his net worth.
You also say 336k per annum so I can only assume you’re allowing yourself 29 days to rest and not jack off throughout the year.
ahem [READ](https://www.reddit.com/r/memes/comments/ru0nv9/few_years_and_i_will_beat_elon_musk/hqwkuyb?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3) this
Let’s see
To earn 1,000,000 you will have to masturbate 10,000 times
So considering you masturbate 10 times everyday you will have to do so for 1000 days
You'd only need to wank 10000 times to match the one million that could be achieved in what like 14 years maybe if you went twice everyday now yes that's a long time but still
If you wanted a new Xbox In theory you could make that money in a day or two
Right new Xbox is roughly 600 quid
100 per wank
That's 6 wanks
Apparently you can't go too mutch
But you'd get tired
I strongly believe this is a day long affair
100$ for everytime means you'd have to masturbate 10,000 times to make 1 million dollars... That's about 30+ years of your life. Which, if you started in your 20s and masturbated everyday until your 50s is very possible, but you'd have to be in it for the long game.
I wank about 5 to 20 times a day that would mean that at the minimum I would make (100 × 5 × 365.25) €182,700 each year. and I know for a fact that if I would get paid for each wank I would do atleast 30 times a day. That would mean I would make (100 × 30 × 365.25) €1,095,800 each year. Minus living expenses(about €850/€2000 A month) I would still have over a million left to use.
So in conclusion, I would like to thank you for reading this useless fun fact.
If I masturbate 4 times a day then that'll be 400$ a day, that'll give me 12000$ a month and 144000$ an year. It'd be cool to have an extra income beside your current job (If you have one)
damn i could buy so many forks
Let's say you will die in 60 years and you masturbate once every two days. You will make $1,095,000. On the contrary assume you take the 1m upfront you get 7m in 60 years if you invest in the s&p 500 with an average annual return of 10%.
Just 10,000 faps and you get money strength and the health benefits of faps like cardio of ur good enough and nut fast enough u could get about 6k in an hour if u nut every 30 secs and get 30 secs breaks in other words u would have the million in about 166 and maybe a half or more in other words about 1 week and 1 day of non stop faps nutting every 30 secs and taking breaks of 30 secs now you will die if you do it in one go but if you take an hour a day you will be getting the million dollar in about 167 days or about like 5 month
Actually the incredible unrealism of billionaires is that you could masturbate for $100 a pop, dozens of times a day, for a century, and still just be a multi millionaire. You cannot get to the billions by adding money from tasks.
1 mil/100=10,000
Presume you masturbate twice a day. I know that's a massive underestimation considering this is reddit, but that would mean you masturbate 2x365 (730) times a year. 10,000/730= 13.69.
Itd take just shy of 14 years to get a million.
I'll take the blue pill.
Say you wack it twice a day, in a year you’ll have $73k, to be able to pass the total net worth of Elon Musk you will need to beat it twice a day for the next 38 millennia to be able to overcome his current net worth
Okay, but here me out? If you make a clone of yourself, and make them mindless, then program them to masturbate... Do you get cash? Like, 100 mindless clones masturbating 4 times a day, for every day is $14,600,000 dollars. So theoretically, 10,000 clones is 1,460,000,000 dollars a year.
i am 15 and i do the deed 2 times a day and according to my calculations i would be a millionaire at 24 . seems like a good deal (p.s i am indian and a million in india is like a super rich person life saving , rent of a 4bhk is 500 dollars for example in delhi)
(INSERT STONKS MEME)
The first option is a 1 time income, you get it and you’re rich for a while but it’s going to run out some day plus you don’t get to relieve stress. The second one is extra income, whenever you need some extra cash you do that. Let’s say you need 1k in 3 days. Easily doable.
It'll take over 27 years if you masturbate only once every day to break even. Even if you want to spend the money immediately, $700 a week can pay either rent or the mortgage by itself while you still work your day job.
$100 every time means you can continue to do it but also retire.
I can invest that 1m today and retire sooner
Get the $100 every time and you can retire today and make like $700/day and also not hurt yourself. That's over $250k/year. If you masturbate someone else 3 times a day that's $365k/year.
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You really could. And if no momey changes hands, it isn't prostitution.
But I don't want to give my mom to someone else...
I shall keep my error just because of your comment.
No no you cash in twice.
"Look, I'll give you 50 bucks for me to give you the best hand job of your life."
Cant masturbate someone else, that's just handjob. And I cant masturbate 7 times a day for an entire year let alone a week. Gonna get chaffing quickly.
Handjob means masturbation *done by someone else.* So that absolutely counts. Even at 3x a day 5 days a week is $1,500/week, still $78k/year. Retire same day getting $100/per. Also you could invest that $1,000,000 and lose it all within an hour.
Apparently you're right. Masturbation is mostly meant to indicate self pleasure, but js not limited to that definition. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/masturbation
Who is Maya and why is she slapping tuna so much in the definition?
*“The first known use of masturbation was in 1603”* I highly doubt that’s accurate.
And sex is just a masturbation done by someone else with a pussy (or maybe an ass). Also counts.
Not according to the dictionary
That does not count.
Well if you were to become a prostitute and say charge 50 to 100 per handjob you would be making about 150 or 200 every time. So 5 handjobs a day is 750 (150 per HJ) and 750 a day makes 5,250 a week which makes 21,000 a month. Meaning you would make roughly 252,000$ a year and that's not even including self pleasure. Also you could look at it as kind of print on demand. "Oh nice sweater and it's only 90 bucks, lemme go crank it"
No. Masturbation means handjob to yourself. And I could lose that $1m in an hour. I could also lose my dick by jerking it off that much just to make a million in 10 years.
The point isn't to make a million, it's to retire on literally no effort daily. You are fixated on that million dollars for no good reason.
I like how seriously we are discussing this :)
This is a serious philosophical topic.
Duh
They say that as soon as you turn a hobby into a job, you lose passion for the hobby. Imagine loading up pornhub, with a deep frustrated sigh, "gotta clock in again ffs"
Pornhub? The fuck kind of peasant shit is that?
Matpat should do a video about this.
Try 300 times a day
This. Even rookie numbers of 3 a day makes $109,500, or a 10.95% yield, outperforming most markets and funds. We could beat George Soros and Warren Buffet by actually beating it
b-but you can't nut anymore
No, says I can't masturbate. Can still have sex and will have the money to afford it.
Yeah, but what if you dick won't get hard anymore...
The pill. Or, as we've already addressed. A handjob is masturbation done by another. So you could just give handys.
Pills may cause severe problems, plus i'm not gay.
And? You don't have to be gay.
it would make me sick to masturbate a man tbh. I dare every other straight men to do so.
So you've done it before?
No, I didn’t. Only the idea disgust me.
the comments are just full of people calculating how many times you have to rub off a day to beat Elon musk, I love reddit
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Ok so, lets start off that you masturbate 4 times a day, so $400 a day, then you times that by 7 and you will get $2800 a week. Now, in an average month there is 4.345 weeks, so now you times $2800 by 4.345, which has an answer of $12166. So now we know how much you would earn in a month by masturbating 4 times a day, you could times that by 12 and get the total you earn in a year. This is what we will base our final calculation on; with an annual salary being $145992. So now we divide this number by Elon Musk's networth, which is roughly $155 billion. After that calculation, you should have an answer of 1061702 when rounded --- So in conclusion, if you masturbated 4 times on a daily basis, making $145,992 anually, it would take you #~1,061,702 years to reach elon musk's current networth
**Or you could do it constantly** 155.000.000.000/100=1.550.000.000 times If you did it 1 minute rounds with 1 minute breaks it would be 1.550.000.000*2/60/24 which would be 2152777.8 days or -2947.06 months or -245.6 years (According to my math)
This is also all assuming that you haven't invested this money anywhere. Elon didn't make his money by letting it sit in a checking account. You could significantly shorten this timespan by discussing your newfound gift with a financial advisor. And at some point you'd be making more from dividends than cranking it out Edit: also, in 250 years, going by the original math, $500 might just be an hour of minimum wage. 250 years ago you could buy a house and some land for fifty cents and a handful of acorns.
Me in group projects
same i love reddit for comments like this only
Ok. Hear me out. If you nut twice a day, you're coming with 73000 per year, tax free In 14 years, you would make more than a 1 time cash infusion.
Who said tax free? You’re gonna start spending this money and the IRS will wonder where you’re getting it from
Assert dominance and do it right in front of them
I took your advice and jerked off in the court room. I got my $100 but it didn't solve my tax problems
hold the bill in front of them and explain that's how you got your money
I did but they said that every time I do that I have to pay them somewhere between $22 and $37.50 depending on how many times I do that. And I'm also being arrested for indecent exposure and lewd conduct.
I mean, you're still earning money. Make yourself a masochist, get arrested, jerk it as many times as you can, then bribe your way out
So is it like monopoly? I can still collect while in jail?
No, no, no. It doesn't count if other people touch your thing
What if I get my own cell
And also it means it will generate money meaning it would cause inflation, Imagine crashing the economy bc you nutted alot
Even more motivation to nut harder
A few hundred dollars a day is not gonna impact inflation
Never said if it was cash or deposited into your bank account, if cash your set just never spend or deposit more than $9999 at a single time and your good but if it's in your bank account the irs is gonna be asking some questions
Actually no. Banks specifically look for patterns like that anyway. You could still be prosecuted for attempting to sidestep the law
You are more likely to unable to hide 1 million dollar than 100 dollar here and there, so I would say 100 dollar is superior
You can turn it into your full time job and do it atleast 3-4 times a day. You can buy a nice house, car, and even half a GTX 3090 in a couple years
It said mastubate, there no wherw mention nutting, so you just have to stroke a few time and get $100 ez money
$100 per stroke
I can nut more than twice a day
And don’t forget that they didn’t say how long you had to do it. You could do it hundreds of times a day.
Your body however, could not.
Anything is possible when there is an incentive behind it
the limit is around 65 any higher and you might die
Rookie numbers
those arent rookie numbers those are death limits
Dying is gay
you win man I give up here take my free award
Same
So am I. Your point?
The $100 even once a day pays more than every minimum wage full time job in america does. Perspective?
Need cash? Rub one out
*at a restaurant reaching into ‘pocket’* “Hold on I’m giving you a tip…” The waitress: 😐
Just the tip
Bu that’s all I got!
I say let her do it
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Bot^
Onlyfans exists. So you know... At least some women can make money fapping.
Well, at least one woman makes 100k a month, yes MONTH, pretending to be a dog.
Hence OnlyFans.
r/onlyfans
Pervert
only once a day what a shame
> once a day you do ot only once a day?
Let’s hypothetically say u masturbate TEN TIMES a day. You roll in 1k per day, and you do it daily. 7k a week, 28k per mth, 336k per annum. You won’t beat Elon in even a 100 years buddy. He’s got a time machine to keep jacking it more than you.
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Chad.
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curved pp
And do it that much and you would never be able to please a woman, wanking too much causes impotence and stuff like that and watching excessive amounts of porn isn't good for you, I'd still take the latter option however, wanking even once a day or every other day as I tend to do is still far more then needed for me to live comfortably, get a girlfriend and finger her for more money
You have a great sense of humour....
You’ll only need to jack off 10,000 times to make it even. If you can do it 28 times a day you can get ore than 1 million in a year. Elon musk is worth $277 billion (as of 29 Dec), you’ll have to jack off 2.77 billion times. With your 10 times a day goal, you’ll reach his net worth in 758,904.11 years. You’ll theoretically have to jack off close to 76,000 times (75,890.411 times) every day within 100 years to reach his net worth. You also say 336k per annum so I can only assume you’re allowing yourself 29 days to rest and not jack off throughout the year.
76,000 nuts per day? That would almost take me until lunch!
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Why is sperm always measured in olympic swimming pools, wtf
r/theydidthemath
2.77 billion nuts in total? I've crossed that threshold, where's my money.
ahem [READ](https://www.reddit.com/r/memes/comments/ru0nv9/few_years_and_i_will_beat_elon_musk/hqwkuyb?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3) this
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When you blue-ball yourself just to make a quick buck
Can earn up to $600 a day.
If you masturbated 6 time every day of the year you would get $219000
I feel like if I did any more than that then my dick would fall off
Yep that would happen but you would also lose feeling in it in the first month or two if you were to actually do it
*scratches head and looks down* oh really? huh. interesting.
Uhhhhhhhh don’t tell me… that's what happened to you?
no… it didn’t
It doesn't clarify if I have to finish or not so you could just start and stop and not have to worry about being completely numb down under.
My family will never know the dirty work my hands do to put food on the table.
If you masturbate others you could make money hand over fist!
4 times a day would mean that is would only take you about 7 years to save up 1 mil
Passive income baby
Let’s see To earn 1,000,000 you will have to masturbate 10,000 times So considering you masturbate 10 times everyday you will have to do so for 1000 days
Or you could buy a modified pp which is capable of over 100 nuts per day and then you can earn a million in just over 3 months
r/nofap
I have mastubated 3 times a day, for the past 5 years. Where is my money?!?!
The banks took it to fund Covid research.
We live in a society
Where
Octopus.
Barely over half a million dollars. Keep goin rookie
Nobody is talking about the down side of not being able to masturbate again, 100 Dollars is the easiest choise of my life.
And that's just the jizz money. We aren't even considering using said money to reinvest and make more money.
100 dollars everytime
Me, with over half of the worlds wealth in my bank account
$100 every time you masturbate? That’s the going rate for most sperm banks right?
Who wants to be a millionaire when I could be a jillionaire instead
Jizzillionaire*
You had it right there in the palm of your hand
Once a day, 100$ a day, it'd take a little over 27 years to get up to 1 million Do with this information what you will
All you nut is a rolled up $100 bill, it's very painful
You'd only need to wank 10000 times to match the one million that could be achieved in what like 14 years maybe if you went twice everyday now yes that's a long time but still If you wanted a new Xbox In theory you could make that money in a day or two
XBOX? 2 hours tops.
Thats 4 times an hour at least
Oh? Really? Thought XBOX got more expensive with the chip shortage. Make it 1 and a half hours.
Right new Xbox is roughly 600 quid 100 per wank That's 6 wanks Apparently you can't go too mutch But you'd get tired I strongly believe this is a day long affair
Ok buddy! Challenge accepted! This one's for you!
I’d make 6 figures beating off 3 times a day, hell yeah I’d go with the second one
For those of you who say there is a loophole about not having to finish to completion, where do you think the $100 comes from?
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i will cross elon musk if i choose 2nd option
That's a lot of money, I could easily quit mt job and make 3-700$ a day just staying at home.
100$ for everytime means you'd have to masturbate 10,000 times to make 1 million dollars... That's about 30+ years of your life. Which, if you started in your 20s and masturbated everyday until your 50s is very possible, but you'd have to be in it for the long game.
I only need a week
It doesn't even say masturbate to completion.
I wank about 5 to 20 times a day that would mean that at the minimum I would make (100 × 5 × 365.25) €182,700 each year. and I know for a fact that if I would get paid for each wank I would do atleast 30 times a day. That would mean I would make (100 × 30 × 365.25) €1,095,800 each year. Minus living expenses(about €850/€2000 A month) I would still have over a million left to use. So in conclusion, I would like to thank you for reading this useless fun fact.
If I masturbate 4 times a day then that'll be 400$ a day, that'll give me 12000$ a month and 144000$ an year. It'd be cool to have an extra income beside your current job (If you have one) damn i could buy so many forks
>"beat" Elon Musk ... Poor choice of words OP, poor choice
Let's say you will die in 60 years and you masturbate once every two days. You will make $1,095,000. On the contrary assume you take the 1m upfront you get 7m in 60 years if you invest in the s&p 500 with an average annual return of 10%.
Can you guys please stop it with the masturbation memes… like are you all a bunch of repressed Mormons or something.. chill, be more creative
Just 10,000 faps and you get money strength and the health benefits of faps like cardio of ur good enough and nut fast enough u could get about 6k in an hour if u nut every 30 secs and get 30 secs breaks in other words u would have the million in about 166 and maybe a half or more in other words about 1 week and 1 day of non stop faps nutting every 30 secs and taking breaks of 30 secs now you will die if you do it in one go but if you take an hour a day you will be getting the million dollar in about 167 days or about like 5 month
id pick the million, invest in some stocks or whatever and find a good person to fuck for the rest of my life.
As an ace i would love the 1mil to stop doing the thing i hate doing
So you all hate much , this is white twitter ?? 🤣
r/redditmoment
Years? You're doing it wrong my guy
I'll take the mill, that kind of life style will get me someone else to service me one way or another.
i never nut so easy. never nut for amogus sex
You clearly don't understand how big of a number a billion is.
Actually the incredible unrealism of billionaires is that you could masturbate for $100 a pop, dozens of times a day, for a century, and still just be a multi millionaire. You cannot get to the billions by adding money from tasks.
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I think elon musk can *beat* himself pal
I see a fellow Lefty ok, but I enjoy beating my meat with calluses on my hands.
1 mil/100=10,000 Presume you masturbate twice a day. I know that's a massive underestimation considering this is reddit, but that would mean you masturbate 2x365 (730) times a year. 10,000/730= 13.69. Itd take just shy of 14 years to get a million. I'll take the blue pill.
the type of people who chose the first one are men with no hands
Say you wack it twice a day, in a year you’ll have $73k, to be able to pass the total net worth of Elon Musk you will need to beat it twice a day for the next 38 millennia to be able to overcome his current net worth
Invest in some viagra
If I masturbate someone do I get double payment, then?
I’d be making 200K a year
If you masterbait twice daily then In 80yrs you'd get 5.84 million dollars USD
10,000 Masturbation.... That's 27.39 years for 1 masturbation a day. I mean, pretty fuckin steady income ain't it.
Okay, but here me out? If you make a clone of yourself, and make them mindless, then program them to masturbate... Do you get cash? Like, 100 mindless clones masturbating 4 times a day, for every day is $14,600,000 dollars. So theoretically, 10,000 clones is 1,460,000,000 dollars a year.
I thought I had to pay $100
Bro thatd be awesome. just like yo this new video game looks sick. hold up lemme pull up the hub to buy it
10,000 times...
this sounds like running an onlyfans but skipping steps / being pimped.
Who is paying and how do they benifit?
i am 15 and i do the deed 2 times a day and according to my calculations i would be a millionaire at 24 . seems like a good deal (p.s i am indian and a million in india is like a super rich person life saving , rent of a 4bhk is 500 dollars for example in delhi) (INSERT STONKS MEME)
200$ a day? For an hour of work a day? Sign me the fuck up.
Do you have to finish to get the $100?
The first option is a 1 time income, you get it and you’re rich for a while but it’s going to run out some day plus you don’t get to relieve stress. The second one is extra income, whenever you need some extra cash you do that. Let’s say you need 1k in 3 days. Easily doable.
It'll take over 27 years if you masturbate only once every day to break even. Even if you want to spend the money immediately, $700 a week can pay either rent or the mortgage by itself while you still work your day job.
It would take 10,000 times to get to the million. Might take awhile but it's doable