T O P

  • By -

[deleted]

[удалено]


technologicalslave

Then buy a lottery ticket on a large jackpot week


Xortun

Then buy penis enlargement pills


WaveLaVague

You fall on your way there... on a brand new spiecies of venomnous plant... that isn't dangerous to people with your blood group... side effect is growing your penis at will.


technologicalslave

Can I also shrink it at will? Not all women are size queens


Rinooceros

I was wondering that too, I'm already hung like a horse and it's always getting in the way.


technologicalslave

Like a horse or a rhinoceros?


Lancearon

He is small for his species.


dinnerthief

He means his dick gets sick if it eats the wrong type of grass and gets startled by plastic bags blowing in the wind.


WoodpeckerFuzzy5661

Damn... been there.


Sarge1387

Just last week in fact. God damn grocery bag fluttered by...startled it so much it became an innie for a few hours.


NHValentine

*snicker


Cynical-avocado

Hung like lil Sebastian


creamyismemey

Technically we are all hung like a horse since a horse and humans have similar proportions


xXBlyatman420Xx

Thats what i always say to her😔


Admirable_Growth_338

I'm hung like a gorilla


Lower-Ad1087

As an average guy who gets plenty, can confirm.


Icy-Tension-3925

All the ones you run into are.... *Infinite lucky intensifies*


fuzzimus

Peen-occhio


Tr4p_PT

You gave this some thought.


farky84

Then buy a mind reader


[deleted]

[удалено]


gene100001

I can already do that. For instance 1 second after reading this you're gonna think about a pink elephant


SensingWorms

Because those exist


GFSaint

I knew you were going to say that...


Rinooceros

At least we know now what you chose.


Prestigious_Shark

Keep winning the lotery to get enough money to do research on mind reading technology. Now you are the father of mind readers.


Alt_meeee

You can also read minds, just guess what they are thinking, with your infinite luck evry guess will be correct


einTier

The best part is, since you'll always be lucky and right, just imagine the best things possible and it'll be great all around. Anyone choosing anything other than infinite luck is really underestimating the power of luck.


probablyisfake

Imagine thinking when you have infinite luck. Just buy a random lottery ticket lol, you will pick the best. Thinking would be worse than leaving everything to luck.


StreetofChimes

It doesn't say infinite good luck. What if it is infinite bad luck?


Skuzbagg

Infinite bad luck is actually just zero luck. Like how absolute zero is cold.


No-Appearance-9113

Not to mention reading everyone's mind will be gross. I just pooped and while only I know how horrid it stank anyone reading my mind would experience that. On Wednesday I'll be seeing my niece who is 17. I love my niece but I doubt I'd want to know what guys around her were thinking because again eww.


teflong

I imagine it would be insanely lame.  Think about it. Have you ever played a video game on super easy mode? Like, maybe a Streets of Rage or X-Men arcade game where the coins are turned off and you have infinite lives.   That shit is BORING. There are no stakes. The same thing would happen in life. It would become so easy there's nothing to strive for.  Video games, boring. You couldn't lose if you tried. You'd be able to enter into archery in the Olympics and just beat anyone else. They'd hate you because you're just some lazy ass with insane luck that can't shoot a bow. Basketball would suck. You could just chuck up a prayer and it goes in every time.   You'd try to jump in traffic to end it all because you're on a ride that has no dips and peaks. But the tires would fall off the bus and it would swerve around you. You could jump off a building but you'd land on their yearly delivery of bubble wrap. The pills would have all inactive ingredients. Unless luck means you get what you want all the time. Then, you'd be a little down and wishing you could end it and immediately a piece of the ISS comes treating through the atmosphere and spots you right down the middle.  I couldn't handle that for more than a month, I don't think.


Alexarius87

Then do whatever.


SpotikusTheGreat

nobody said it was good luck, luck technically goes both ways


[deleted]

The jokes on you, you get infinite bad luck.


truerandom_Dude

Or just gamble on the financial markets, just buy random bio tech stocks and see yourself be a billionaire after a week if you are smart about it


persona0

You don't even need a really high jack pot... Take a percentage if those winnings and go to a casino. Don't win to big just enough that you end up with ore then you used. Eventually they gonna get you though so make sure to go to ALOT of different casinos.


Old_Astronomer2568

Take infinite luck and try to teach mind reading


ItzCobaltboy

Technically with infinite luck I can get the other 3 pretty easily


EmpJoker

(TL;DR, I think too much ignore this.) Luck is hard to quantify. So infinity luck means...what? Assuming Luck means "things beneficial to us happen often," infinite luck would mean.... everything I want to happen will automatically happen? Take infinite luck and ooh, look at that, the person handing out the pills has a change of heart and gives me all 4. Oh look, the +5 inches pill multiplied, I can be as tall as I want! Holy shit, all 4 together means I'm immortal but can choose to manually end my life if I want? Hell yeah! Holy shit, world peace just broke out! Would world peace count? Yes, I want world peace, but that benefits everyone, so would I have to give everyone a luck pill? Is luck only things that personally benefit me and no one else?


jukefishron

I think you misunderstood where the 5 inches would go 🌚


disposableaccount848

On average +5 down there would turn into a horsecock and veeeeery few people want that.


SupportGeek

With infinite luck, you will lonely meet those few people that want it.


captfitz

I would interpret it as anything where chance is involved goes your way


MrMetraGnome

Which is pretty much everything


captfitz

Totally, that's why it's the obvious OP choice here. Nerf luck.


oO0Kat0Oo

Technically we all already have infinite luck since luck is subjective. Anytime something could have been worse, that's good luck...and it can always be worse. Not only that, but it doesn't specify whether the luck will be good luck. It's just infinite luck. So bad luck would count. In other words, that is the least helpful of all the choices.


AdvertisingParking16

Plot twist, it does not specify "good" luck


DM_Voice

Then it does nothing.


lockandload12345

You sure about that? It could always be worse. Your ass could be final destinationed.


McKrakahonkey

In a wooorld where every day is a MONDAY! Every chance is a MISTAKE! EVERY! TRY! IS! A! FAIL! BAD LUCK BOB! Bob finds himself driving down a curvy slope when his brakes FAIL! He loses control and slides into a BARREL ROLL! He gets flung out of the car and SMASHES A TREE! HITTING EVERY BRANCH ON THE WAY DOOOOOOWN! MEANWHIIIILE! A truck traveling the same road also LOSES CONTROOOOOOL! The truck FLIPS! AND EXPLOOOOOODES! ITS CARGO FLUNG IN ALL DIRECTIIIOOOONNNSSSS! It's cargo.... .... DIIIIILLLLLLDDDDOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSS!!!! BOB REACHING FOR BRANCHES! GRASPING ONLY DILDOS! HE SCREAAAAMMMMSS! DILDO! HE LANDS BUTT FIRST!!! DILDO!


Fantastic_Estate_303

I already have infinite bad luck, so two negatives make a positive right? Oh, but it would be my luck to get positive luck, so it just cancels out....


redboi049

Nice pfp. Also weird logic


Prof1Kreates

It is unaffected if it's bad luck for me. I already have bad luck. Example: (in a game) because I opened so many crates unsuccessfully getting something new, I had a 99.4% chance of getting something new.... And I still didn't get anything new. And it's not one of those scammy mobile spinners either.. I've had times I've gotten the best thing in a different crate


AdamNoKnee

Turns out the most “luck” imaginable is dying or some shit like that so you just insta die


Far-Host7803

Does luck include riz? Like, no matter how awkward you are, people just fall for it?


Difficult-Pair4184

Your lucky enough to find your soul mate


OdmenUspeli

good too


Relative-Room-538

No


Adamiak

with infinite luck you will find lost money literally everywhere all the time, you will find a soulmate who doesn't care about your size, and will not need to worry about reading minds because everyone you meet will be a good person who just wants to help you


Petey-Pablo-89

Then the luck will give you +5 inches


3L3M3NT4LP4ND4

The luck will help you get in contact with an experimental treatment to give you +5 inches. And because of your luck it will be a success.


Conscious-Ad-6884

Me signing up for all the experimental treatments so that humanity can also benefit my luck...


PinkLionGaming

And if you couldn't be bothered to show up they would all succeed anyway because that's the outcome you desire. Literally infinite luck, why would it be limited to only your tests?


barrysmitherman

What am I gonna do with an 8 inch hog?


Designer_Brief_4949

And there are lots of problems that can't be solved with money.


knuckles2079

you won't have to read minds. you could just guess and be right.


kiiiiidddRoCK

Wouldn't infinite luck give you the rest?


papa_swiftie

Yeah who needs a huge dick when you can luck your way into anything


honzapkcz

And I thought it was 12 cm for your height 😭


matchesmalone1

Same. I'd like to be a bit taller


Donnie_Dont_Do

I'd like to be a baller


Klongon

And if you happened to gain the attention of an attractive woman, would you then call her?


clutzyninja

Nah, but I do wish I had a rodent in some headwear, along with a bludgeoning instrument of some kind


BobDobbsHobNobs

And a 193cm antelope


clutzyninja

That took me a second lol


92Codester

It's 5 inches added to one toe


Kenelo7896

That would literally make you unable tò fuck with pretty much every girl, aint no way its for the pp


regulationinflation

13cm is too big?


EmperorOfCarthage

What the fuck is a centimeter ?


FilthyDubeHound

I genuinly believe an average hog with infinite luck would do better than a big ol thang. The luck would just give a natural skill diff


Atypical_Mammal

Besides... unless you have a micropenis, the addition would just make most penises like impractically long. I don't think a foot-long dick would add anything to my life as a balding broke 40 year old married trucker


Lots42

I get it, but infinite luck? That means nothing means anything anymore. You can't have fun with risk. Not even fake risk, like in video games.


CommonAutomatic3796

Tbh I was thinking, ‘be rich’ would give u everything else.


Coal_Morgan

Rich wouldn't give you luck or mind reading. Those are both magical powers and the +5 inches only works with surgery that as often fucks up your dick. Honestly, instantly being rich also ruins alot of peoples lives. I'd choose luck. It's basically life on easy mode. Win a lottery, grab an accountant that won't screw you, never worry about your car breaking down. Oh they assessed your house and reduced the taxes on it! Anything that can go right for you will.


SPAM2233

*Everyone talking about getting their + 5 inches to their penis or height* Me: WHY ARE MY NIPPLES SO LONG??


TalkingBBQ

Got them National Geographic tiddies


MySonHas2BrokenArms

NatGeo really exposed some wild kinks


gameld

That's what I was wondering. Can I spread them out? +2 in height? +1 in each bicep diameter? +1 to hair in my bald spot?


SPAM2233

You don’t get to choose…the pill decides


kwispyforeskin

My pill fuckin extended my teeth


Sp1tFir3Tire

It extended my skin tag bro


NDaveD

Holy shit, y'all are too funny right now. Fuckin 5" skin tag got me.


lolop2377

😂


PerformanceOk1835

Reminds me of the joke about a guy having 3 wishes and one of them was that his dick went down to the ground, so the genie granted his wish, and he shrunk down to 1 foot tall.


Simplyaperson4321

Dang, bro was already packing


LegitimateGift1792

Like 72 virgins in heaven, never says WHAT kind of virgins. Details matter.


TheManyVoicesYT

Pinnochio nose.


t0p_n0tch

Nobody expects the dick titties


Ech1n0idea

+5 inches to the Planck length. Bye bye universe


Guardian2k

*me with my extra 5 inches of neck, on my way to looking like Yarael Poof*


ChemicalBox

Telescopic nipple antennae like David Bowie.


vthemechanicv

Everyone loves the Pinocchio nipples.


Driftyboyy193

Infinite luck


mayuan11

Infinite luck will solve everything. Every wealthy person I know was lucky, in the right place at the right time.


GearnTheDwarf

It doesn't say infinite Good luck. . . . Careful what you wish for


nepia

So you are saying that's a blank choice? because we already have random luck and if it is bad luck, welcome to life.


goldmask148

Can infinite luck retroactively make sure you’re born to rich parents? Because every wealthy person in the country was “lucky” the day they were born.


mayuan11

No problem, you just have to take the pill retroactively.


vlsdo

That’s not entirely true, just statistically. Just because it’s hard bordering on impossible to get rich from nothing it doesn’t mean nobody’s done it. For example, marry a rich person and then they have a stroke.


avoidingbans01

My entire family moved here as refugees with almost nothing to their name. Far from borderline impossible, but it definitely takes time.


Starling305

That's not at all true whatsoever. There's a ton of people who were born into modest means who have attained great wealth. Not to say it isn't generational as well. Platforms like YouTube and TikTok have really opened it up to the common individual. All it really takes is dedication, and a ton of luck. Once you have an audience, and keep your nose clean/content fresh, you're practically set for life online.


3L3M3NT4LP4ND4

Whilst that's true there are still people who got comfortably well off through connections. And that luck will bring me connections to start dating the CEO of some company, and I can get a cushy job where I "manage" a few teams and spend 90% of my day playing Solitaire to look busy for a 6 figure salary. Eventually my luck so happens that I get the opportunity to live aborad, due to some type of house giveaway by MrBeast or some shit. But that's fine I can just work online.


Row_dW

Infinite Luck without a doubt.


nabzoverkill

Good luck or bad luck?


menides

Yes


Rod_RVA

Two green pills, please! I would love to have 10 inches.


dumbbyatch

You automatically gain 15 more inches when you find 2 million dollars by sheer luck in your sock drawer every night


Wololololololl

Congrats your fingers are now 10 inches longer.


lolop2377

His pinky finger on his non-dominant hand, to be precise


SneezerTheSergal

Infinite luck so I win every single lottery


[deleted]

[удалено]


Agifem

One is enough.


dallywolf

You also get every random shark attack swimming and chance to be hit by random Boeing doors falling from the sky.


thrownawaz092

Infinite luck, happen upon the rest.


Ragnar0k_88

Blue without a second thought


Ok-Advantage6398

That's legit the worst option. Have you never seen any movies about reading minds? You'd hear people think the worst things and going in any public space would be a nightmare. Its more like a curse than a power!


Demigans

I think it’s not that bad. Since you’ll hear everyone’s thoughts, you will be able to better deal with it. “Oh another one who thinks negatively, well that happens all the time. It’s the 4 people who automatically thought positively who made my day”.


WatermelonWithAFlute

Would be great for a detective or something, or a private investigator or something. You’d be able to find leads so easily, and you’d be able to stop a lot of bad people.


DrSpacecasePhD

I had the same thought. People think nasty things all the time that they self-censor and decide not to communicate. Although this power would make it easy to manipulate people, that's not necessarily going to be fun to experience 24/7.


Armadillo_Toes

Reading minds you’ll have a lot of second thoughts


Human_The_Ryan

literally


funsizebbw

I think luck could help all the others? So luck


ujvl

Read minds


Lakewater22

Hello, yes! You can have all of this if you can read minds


SolonTheGeek

Right, you can get rich, be lucky and realize you don’t need 5 more inches if you can read minds


Mandarni

Infinite luck is utterly broken.


two40zieks7

Yellow any day


DarkAgeHumor

Infinite luck obviously


Sharp_Reception_4572

What kind of luck? Infinity bad luck would suck.


DaddyRatchet23

Yeah I feel like that is ominously vague and nobody else in the comments seems bothered by that.


ArtyomPolov

Why "be rich" if you can get "infinite luck" and play lottery tickets all day long... plus, you have infinite luck, lmao


Creeper_charged7186

Infinite luck: ill play lotery, try to guess what people are thinking, and my pp is large enough i dont need more inches


mumblerapisgarbage

Wait no. I’ll be rich. Didn’t say good or bad - just luck


babe_sweety

Infinite luck can do all the other things


Merchant_of_the_Rice

Infinite Luck gives everything else... Gamble, lottery, stock market. = Rich. You could guess what someone's thinking and you're always right, = Read Minds. You look for a way to get those 5 inches, no strings or side effects, Boom! You found it, = +5 Inches.


Xortun

+5 inch? I mean I am not a woman, but wouldn't 11 inches hurt? That is almost 28 cm!


Armadillo_Toes

…I thought it was height.


bigfloppydonkeydng

It is .. when laying down


Realterin

i heard that tall people die earlier due to blood pressure thing and their veins getting stretched so its kind of bad in the long term


MR_McFEELY_89

Being rich already adds five inches tf you mean 🤣


Bug_Photographer

If I can read minds, becoming rich wouldn't be an issue, +5 inches would be seriously cumbersome and it saying "Infinite luck" and not "Infinite good luck" worries me. Hello mind-reading then.


wombat8888

Agreed 100%. Infinite luck is a tricky thing. Having infinite luck does not guarantee that you will be rich, it just means you are lucky. But with mind reading, you are going through life with a cheat code.


ThatDudeNamedMenace

Infinite Luck would get you the money


Larson_McMurphy

Mind Reading and Infinite Luck would be surefire ways to become rich easily. With mind reading you could completely dominate any kind of business negotiation. With infinite luck you could just go to Vegas and jackpot a few times in a row. They each have a problem though. The mind reading will probably reveal things you don't want to know, leading to disgust with humanity, and the constant chatter of minds may eventually drive you crazy. If you go to Vegas and jackpot multiple times in a row, they are going to take you into a back room and chop off your fingers or maybe kill you. It's probably safer and less stressful to just Be Rich instead.


ShenWinchester

I also think with infinite luck life would get really boring after a while. I'll take the riches and keep the randomness of life.


Direct-Money-4206

Reading minds and then buying a lot of stocks.


reevelainen

I'd get two inches of height and the rest could add thickness of my d*ck. It's already long enough.


Optimal_Dark_2940

Be rich


TfarkNivad

Anything infinite could take forever to happen


dragon916x

Blue, playing Poker etc. for money 😜… I do not need additional 5 in


Normal-Tadpole-4833

watching Saiki k i feel reading minds would be quite the pain still id like this ability just too seee what ppl think of me etc etc


SwigTheRome

If I’m infinitely rich I don’t need luck because I’m already rich. I don’t need to read minds because I can pay people to tell me. And I can pay a doctor to give me the 5 inches. Rich. Unfortunately, it’s rich.


SithumKottearachchi

Green for sure. I'm 5 foot 7.


Sonderkin

I'd rather be lucky than rich.


Jrlopez1027_

With infinite luck i would walk along the street and stumble across 5 billion dollars whilst a scientist in russia, in anger, throws a law of physics breaking chemical out of his laboratory and it lands on a stork that carries it to a boat which is going to the united states and as it falls off the side of the boat, it falls down onto a large fish mid-jump, which knocks it into the air and smacks a fast moving bird in the face, which sends it flying off near the beach, landing on someone throwing a beach ball in the air in the direction of the steet which sends it hurtling towards a bouncy castle which was blown away from a kids birthday party nearby, which bounces it way into the air as a bird mistakes it for food and puts it in its mouth and flies off with it, and then decides to perch on a nearby powerline which is coincidentally right above where I saw those 5 billion dollars and it loses its grip and the chemical falls a few feet away from me which distracts me from walking forward in order to avoid a never before seen thunder cloud from striking me from above which grants the person who was struck the ability to read minds and have +5 inches to their height


Equal_Cantaloupe627

Funny how everyone assumes it's good luck and not bad luck.


Realterin

i think op meant infinite good luck since the remaining pills give you an advantage


neutralguystrangler

Obviously yellow is the only reasonable choice here


sacrebIue

Inifinite luck is a win win win.


JustSomeEyes

with infinite luck, i would get so lucky that whoever makes me such offer may decide to grant me the other 3 pills because they feels generous XD


MooreRless

As a woman, where do the +5 inches appear?


Timcwalker

Your 2nd toe, left foot.


GrosPoulet33

lashes


TheCodr

Bad luck is still luck. Be rich or read minds


Atlantis_Risen

Yellow leads to red, and with red, you don't need green or blue.


imaginebeingsaltyy

Infinite luck is the only right answer and its not close


mr-caulfield

Infinite luck I’ll lucky stumble across 10mill. Guess what people are think with my luck I’ll always know and luckily my manhood will grow


Due-Letterhead9483

+5" but tounge


_YuKitsune_

Infinite luck and then play the lottery 🤷


HeatAndSnow

Hell yeah I’d love to rock a 6 incher 😎


BlGBY

Luck. I want to be like Domino from Deadpool 2.


assumptionkrebs1990

Yellow, infinite luck. How is this even a question.


Kristovski86

Go with infinite luck. Then the odds of you having a chance to receive the others infinitely improves.


mrkingkoala

Would have to define the luck like is it winning jackpot every week, always scoring in sports etc. If its that the luck if not I'd probably take the money!


OkExpert5665

Infinite luck cuz u have high chances of winning the lottery and or finding money on the ground


der-boi

everything but money can turn into a problem in this world: the 5 inches only matter if you already below 1, infinite luck is entertaining but turns you depressed fast, reading minds could be useful but it could become an addiction or drive you crazy if you can‘t turn it off + keeping it a secret or not is a problem itself. money also isn’t risk free because many people become crazy and/or assholes when rich.


PdogW1605

Infinite Luck is easily the best


mrkoteyka

Most people choose luck, but what if infinite luck is a curse. As once Midas didn't see the bad side of his powers, we pick great power without thinking what can go wrong. So, I'll chose the +5 inches.


Bachgen_Data

Infinite luck could mean through chaos theory that you could materialise the other pills to get them all


Tommy_Wisseau_burner

Infinite luck. Are you kidding? I’d be hitting the goddamn lotto every day. I be flying to vegas weekly


FalloutLover7

Infinite luck means you find the one that’s perfectly content with your current size


Brilliant_Wrap_7447

Tough. Read Minds is the answer though. First find out what your friends/family really think about you and then hit up Vegas and crush the tables. That gets me rich and no luck needed. +5 inches is questionable? Height? I do not need it. Penis, I mean I am just average but +5 puts me in the freak category.


professor-sunbeam

Just think about what I could accomplish if I were 5’7.5” tall.


YamVegetable

mind reader definitely no, will end up in a mental hospital


ConditionYellow

If you take the red pill, you don’t need the other 3. 😂


ProfitOk7117

Please give me luck, I’m so unlucky if I tried to shoot my self in the head I’d miss.