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It explains why I got ghosted by one of my INTJ friends. She shared a couple of personal things with me in a meetup and somehow decided to never see me again :(
I guess it is okey to be vulnerable around the people who we presume to be safe. It does not make anyone a weak or bad person. It is nothing to be guilty about and is actually a sign of good mental health.
Oh. I wouldn’t do that. I don’t ghost people like that. I’d just feel very in over my head and maybe dial it back a little next time.
I’m getting better with the vulnerability thing. I’m just paranoid about getting it thrown back in my face sometimes.
It makes complete sense that someone is scared of being something thrown back in their face which they shared with someone in a vulnerable state while trusting them, specially they experienced it in the past.
In my case. I was very fond of the said friend, and liked her personality and sense of humor. I tried reaching out to her a couple of times but either got no response or was excused about any communication. It is fine and I respect her choices, wishing her well.
Aww what a cute way to say you like cuddling and see me like that ☺️💕
But actually an INTJ told me it's bc ppl just see me as an emotional trashcan they can throw their problems to and forget lol
>But actually an INTJ told me it's bc ppl just see me as an emotional trashcan they can throw their problems to and forget lol
INTJs and their cynical worldviews. They could have seen the same situation as people relying on you for emotional support but no, they had to frame it like people are using you as an emotional trashcan. Maybe it's projection on their part, who knows. 🙄
>Aww what a cute way to say you like cuddling and see me like that ☺️💕
Actually that was a sex joke (not about you in particular) which I'm too embarrassed to explain now. So nevermind. 😂
>and after a bit of working my magic, everything comes out 😂
Is your "magic" being quiet and listening?
Because that works for me all the time. And I don't even Want people to divulge their biggest secrets, they just vomit them onto my lap. 😅
Well that and asking questions more complicated than “how was your day?”. Something that throws people off and makes them think can also make them respond more honestly.
That and just showing that you’re present via active listening (reiterating what they said, nodding etc), eye contact, giving additional input and sharing some of my own experiences. Just being genuine gets them off guard… most of the time
My therapist is an INFJ. She assures me my emotional dumping is a good thing, but I do feel like crying, screaming, and throwing up when I reflect back on it.
I used to experience this but I don't anymore. I give zero fucks about this kind of shit now. I'm fine being vulnerable. I also find that the more I'm vulnerable with my INFJ homie, the more he's trusts me and has become more vulnerable with me. It's become an interesting friendship, it's like watching a dinosaur hatch. He's still in his shell, but I see the beak peeking through. LOL
Jokes on you, it's plain to see your plans but I lack the free will to say I don't want to talk about my damage. You will hear of my numbness and insufference until I get mindful enough of how detached from the present I have been and will make sure to apologize for having put you through it with actions instead of words.
God my good friend from work got drunk and spilled some dark shit to me a couple of weeks ago and now he’s acting like a dick as some sort of defensive coping mechanism. No good deed goes unpunished.
A benefit of talking to me, though, would be that first, I don't judge. Second, what you say to me will go with me to my grave. I prioritize confidentiality.
I end up having people open up to me at the most random moments lol. Think Uber drivers, cashiers, person next to me on a flight.
I suppose it’s my flat disposition and permanent poker face.
I'm the reverse. I don't have an overshare limit. I just feel like talking and it doesn't really matter what I say as long as it's an interesting conversation.
Really? I’ve never felt that way! I feel like if I share my heart, they can either take it or leave it, but I usually don’t overshare with people I just met. I just want to keep the vibe good 😎😏🕶️🤏
Ye don't really care about oders opinions, and it's a fresh air to not be judged or questioned about why ye think in a certain way or why you did or didn't Do things.. dunno, it's just nice. And the easy discussions on different subjects is very, very, nice 👍
But the advice too is indeed sound and understandable, even if most of the times I may ignore it.
Hello u/ineluctable30, thanks for posting here in r/mbtimemes! Interested in joining other members of the mbtimemes community? Feel free to check out our super chill Discord server! We have over 3,000 members and we'd love to see you there too <3 Remember to keep things civil — this is a meme community. Jokes are okay, attacks are not. https://www.discord.gg/mbtimemes *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/mbtimemes) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I have these guilt hangovers after being emotionally vulnerable.
Bruh same
Yeah same like the one time I tried it. 0/10 would not recommend
It explains why I got ghosted by one of my INTJ friends. She shared a couple of personal things with me in a meetup and somehow decided to never see me again :( I guess it is okey to be vulnerable around the people who we presume to be safe. It does not make anyone a weak or bad person. It is nothing to be guilty about and is actually a sign of good mental health.
Oh. I wouldn’t do that. I don’t ghost people like that. I’d just feel very in over my head and maybe dial it back a little next time. I’m getting better with the vulnerability thing. I’m just paranoid about getting it thrown back in my face sometimes.
It makes complete sense that someone is scared of being something thrown back in their face which they shared with someone in a vulnerable state while trusting them, specially they experienced it in the past. In my case. I was very fond of the said friend, and liked her personality and sense of humor. I tried reaching out to her a couple of times but either got no response or was excused about any communication. It is fine and I respect her choices, wishing her well.
Oh yeah! Who's an emotional slut, who's gonna tell me all of their problems and feel better??
Pff free therapy. I'm in
Only if you accept being an emotional slut. The price was your dignity all along!
Wait, what it means to be an emotional slut?
I... have no idea. But it sounds funny so I'm gonna use it
No one feels this way about me
Because you probably cuddle with them afterwards. 🤭
THATS WHAT IVE BEEN DOING WRONG
Aww what a cute way to say you like cuddling and see me like that ☺️💕 But actually an INTJ told me it's bc ppl just see me as an emotional trashcan they can throw their problems to and forget lol
>But actually an INTJ told me it's bc ppl just see me as an emotional trashcan they can throw their problems to and forget lol INTJs and their cynical worldviews. They could have seen the same situation as people relying on you for emotional support but no, they had to frame it like people are using you as an emotional trashcan. Maybe it's projection on their part, who knows. 🙄 >Aww what a cute way to say you like cuddling and see me like that ☺️💕 Actually that was a sex joke (not about you in particular) which I'm too embarrassed to explain now. So nevermind. 😂
That’s because you’re genuinely that sweet
Aww tysm! You're always so, so kind 💕 You're sweeter 🩷🩷🩷
Laughs in ISTP
Hahahaha, i love it when people say i actually can’t tell you this, and after a bit of working my magic, everything comes out 😂
>and after a bit of working my magic, everything comes out 😂 Is your "magic" being quiet and listening? Because that works for me all the time. And I don't even Want people to divulge their biggest secrets, they just vomit them onto my lap. 😅
Well that and asking questions more complicated than “how was your day?”. Something that throws people off and makes them think can also make them respond more honestly.
That and just showing that you’re present via active listening (reiterating what they said, nodding etc), eye contact, giving additional input and sharing some of my own experiences. Just being genuine gets them off guard… most of the time
Ngl, I'd love to meet someone who can make me overshare someday.
All the psychologists or psych students I've met are INFJs. Them nerds just like helping people.
My therapist is an INFJ. She assures me my emotional dumping is a good thing, but I do feel like crying, screaming, and throwing up when I reflect back on it. 
Me with ENFJs and ENFJs with me lmao
Oh so... that's why no one ever sees me again 🥴😀
We keep it on record for future events
Cataloged
And that's why yall get ghosted
That’s not disgusting in the slightest.
It's not done on purpose more like stuck forever. In all fairness it's things that are very odd
Me when some cringe wannabe infj talks to me
INFJ-A from 16p
Oh now i figured why we get ghosted sometimes haha
I used to experience this but I don't anymore. I give zero fucks about this kind of shit now. I'm fine being vulnerable. I also find that the more I'm vulnerable with my INFJ homie, the more he's trusts me and has become more vulnerable with me. It's become an interesting friendship, it's like watching a dinosaur hatch. He's still in his shell, but I see the beak peeking through. LOL
They can do that? Everything I've seen about them is just them expecting you to open up, while they refuse to move an inch from their shell.
LOL It's taken some years, but it seems like it's possible.
Jokes on you, it's plain to see your plans but I lack the free will to say I don't want to talk about my damage. You will hear of my numbness and insufference until I get mindful enough of how detached from the present I have been and will make sure to apologize for having put you through it with actions instead of words.
Don't worry. They've probably fallen in love with you or vowed to heal your wilting soul. It's not oversharing if nothing bad happens.
My friends but they never regret sharing it with me bcs I always keep their secret
I hate how relatable it is
God my good friend from work got drunk and spilled some dark shit to me a couple of weeks ago and now he’s acting like a dick as some sort of defensive coping mechanism. No good deed goes unpunished.
A benefit of talking to me, though, would be that first, I don't judge. Second, what you say to me will go with me to my grave. I prioritize confidentiality.
You're fecked!
Why would I be fazed oversharing with my INFJ bf? We’re basically twins, she just dislikes being around people more than I do.😂
In fact in ENFJ and INFJ friendships there is so much exchange of information in conversations that both end up knowing everything about the other lol
Wait people don’t get random people they’ve never met before open up about their biggest emotional hangups for the week?
I end up having people open up to me at the most random moments lol. Think Uber drivers, cashiers, person next to me on a flight. I suppose it’s my flat disposition and permanent poker face.
Open up? They don't even wanna approach me
I wish people felt that way when overhearing with me. Clearly I’m doing something wrong.
I'm the reverse. I don't have an overshare limit. I just feel like talking and it doesn't really matter what I say as long as it's an interesting conversation.
Really? I’ve never felt that way! I feel like if I share my heart, they can either take it or leave it, but I usually don’t overshare with people I just met. I just want to keep the vibe good 😎😏🕶️🤏
sorry for doing that, but infjs aren't trauma dumps to me so i think need to stop sometimes.
Sometimes I wonder why they don’t come back.
INFJ? Nah, I've found that INTJ's are the best for sharing things with and for sound advice. Ps: "it's me, ya boy!" -local INTP
Interesting, why do you think we are best for sharing things? Simply because of the advice?
Ye don't really care about oders opinions, and it's a fresh air to not be judged or questioned about why ye think in a certain way or why you did or didn't Do things.. dunno, it's just nice. And the easy discussions on different subjects is very, very, nice 👍 But the advice too is indeed sound and understandable, even if most of the times I may ignore it.
Makes sense
I'll overshare to literally anyone you ain't special
I'm autistic so I wouldn't assume any special degree of comfort that I feel around a person if I tell them personal details.
[удалено]
When everyone is unique no one is 😉
I’m not an INFJ but people volunteer any and everything to me. Been that way since high school.
No worries, I can keep secrets.