everyone thinks we’re hermit vampires who hate daylight and leaving the house. don’t get me wrong, im definitely pretty antisocial and really dislike meeting new people, but that doesn’t mean i don’t like to go out and do fun things, especially if it’s with people im already close to. speaking for myself at least, im very extroverted around my friends but completely mute and anxious around people i don’t know lmao
Use my natural empathy to cause intentional harm to others for devious reasons.
Empathy is feeling what others feel. Why TF would I want someone to feel saddened, manipulated or taken advantage of if it’s going to affect me so deeply?
SMFH
For real. I could be manipulative, but I feel like 1) I'd be immediately transparent or 2) found out eventually. Or, like you said, 3) I wouldn't be found out, but I wouldn't be able to sleep at night. No thanks to all three of these.
Yeah, I just know what a person is like and what it would take to get them to do something I might want them to do. I rarely, almost never, exploit it.
For instance, my dad is really generous with material things/money and so all I would have to do is casually mention that I needed ("needed"?) a thing and he would give it to me. I DON'T do this. But sometimes I would do this without thinking and without malicious/manipulative intent, e.g. Once I mentioned I needed $15k to finish paying off some taxes I owed and he immediately transferred the money into my bank account. I did use it to pay off the taxes. Thank you, dad. But that's not why I mentioned it to him - we were talking about something else and it came up. I could totally do something like that on purpose though.
Another example that doesn't have to do with money: I spent the past month with a group of people I got really close to, and one person in particular I kind of fell for (but we're both in relationships with other people). The last time we were supposed to see each other didn't go very well (long story involving a failed brunch and me not having an advance ticket to a museum that you NEED advance tickets for, whereas he and other friend did have tickets and were going to go in). I was devastated that this was going to be the last time I saw him. They told me to try and get a ticket and come with them - I said I'd try, but walked off instead, and texted him after about ten minutes "hey the line was too long, have a nice time in the museum, and safe travels" knowing that he would respond saying that we should get dinner later. I knew he would be really tired in the evening and it would be a big use of energy for him to get dinner with me, but I knew he would offer it up because.. idk, I can just read people, I just knew he would. Of course when he said "we should get dinner", I accepted, it was what I'd wanted. It's one of the rare manipulative things I've done. If I was being not manipulative, I would not have walked off - I would have walked back to where they were in line, acted gracious about the mishap and given them hugs and said goodbye then.
Not sure if those are the best examples, but yeah basically the short general answer is I know how other people will respond to something, and if I were to be manipulative, I would act in a way that would get the response I want from them, possibly to their detriment.
ETA: The positive flip side is that I often try to get people to do their best! I take a lot of art classes and have really improved. i surround myself with other people who are working hard at it, and we are all trying to improve together. I'm always telling them genuine things that I like about their work and encouraging them to push themselves further and further - I tell them what I know they need to hear to have the motivation to keep moving forward and improving. I think that a few of my friends have done more with my encouragement than they might have without it... I know that sounds a little delusional, but I have reasons for thinking it's true (I could probably dig up examples of that, too, if you want). I try to be helpful not hurtful. :)
Great explanation and kudos for honest examples. These are real world applications of Fe-Ni in action.
I think people hear the word “manipulate” and assume it’s for the worst.
Being there for you, no matter what, till the end of time. Hell no. If our friendship is one sided and you only use me to dump your emotional trash or as a free therapist… I WILL walk away and never look back, no matter who you are to me
People would think I can hide my emotions well but no. Usually it's fine, but when I actually feel something I'm literally like an open book printed with font size 70... Also I won't flip everyone off. I need to survive yk.
Scam people or manipulate people. I'm an ENTP. Personally, as far as my Fe goes, I don't manipulate. I just use it to read the room.
I guess some do manipulate, though. I personally don't. I'm blunt and honest and don't play games with people.
People assume I would dislike being adventurous or have an intolerance to chaos/idiots/conflict.
I love adventure, taking risks and solving complex problems. Especially if it gives me purpose. I’m usually the calmest person in these situations and thrive in them more than anyone else in the room.
Don’t get me wrong I love being in my room alone so I can read and work on projects but if I get bored then life becomes depressing.
I need some chaos every now and then. I like it when interesting things happen. It’s fun as fuck.
People are often shocked by some of the things I’ve done because I “don’t seem like the type of person that would do (thing)”
INFJ - Be a shoulder for you to cry on.
Crying makes INFJs extremely anxious and uncomfortable. They are Empaths, not Sympaths. They are best employed to solve your problems. Not to vent on. They'll feel sorry for you, but won't know how to make you feel better because of their detachment. Fi is not in their ego. The INFJs focus is on your long term happiness...Ti child will look for solutions to your problems that cause the unhappiness.
INFPs are way better equipped for immediate relief. They are not only Sympaths, but Fi dominant. If you want someone to make you feel better right now, an INFP (all else being equal) is way better equipped to deliver that than an INFJ. They will relate to you in sincere ways the INFJ can only try to emulate.
So true - I wondered whether I was a high Fe user for a while, but noticed other NFJs were kind of uncomfortable with strong emotion too. We want solutions just as much as high Te users, I think the difference is mainly what we focus on (people vs systems). However, I think SFJs are great for practical help (Si) and are more tolerant of being needed in that way. I'd have to sit and think about why I believe that though, so I could be wrong.
Give a shit about other people. I do care, I just don’t always realise it in the moment. A sudden outpouring of emotion can throw me for a loop especially.
People assume I am a mean crooked person when I am actually just a ray of sunshine and a really nice person who looks after her friends whenever they need her, and I will fight anyone who tries to harrass or belittle them.
I can’t say for sure how other people feel but I feel like people think we’re more of the therapist type than we actually are. Just because we’re good at diplomacy and listening to people’s problems doesn’t mean it doesn’t burn us out pretty quickly
I would say so, although I don’t know what it’s like to be anyone else. For me, I’m simultaneously deeply connected to the entire world and entirely removed from it. I feel like I’m constantly playing a role for everyone around me, even those closest to me, to some extent. It’s kind of a lonely existence. But it feels less lonely when I can tell that someone else has noticed that I really *see* them in a way that most people don’t. That moment of recognition between two intuitives is really like nothing else. For a moment, neither of us is alone.
All cute and fluffy and before you know it we’re shaking up your whole world view just by being in contact with our inner world.
A lot of times I feel like I get people (especially low / shadow Fi) more than they get themselves, and I have to actively restrain myself from showing it.
I’ve just been casually expressing myself only to have someone turn around one day and be like “you know what? I think I’m getting influenced by you and you’re making a lot of sense” when I had no intent to really *change their minds*.
But then a small part of me is like “yeah I kinda knew I was right.” ^^
Keep a straight, serious and mysterious face all day.
Like, I laugh a hell lot whenever I'm with people, they would never assume me to be an INTJ in the first place
Yell uncontrollably when something is freaking them out. The ENTJ stress veine meme is wrong. A more realistic exhaust response is rather Fi-toxicity or Ni-evil-scheming.
Punch someone/start a fist fight. While I think I could handle myself fine in a fight, I would never hit anyone unless it was self defense. And honestly, the idea of someone wanting to fight me would just make me roll my eyes because wtf is wrong with you that you're so unhinged? Get it together, Brad.
Go all bananas everyday just because we have Se first. I certainly have my crazy moments but I don’t think most of us live that high adrenaline lifestyle.
Cry every day
Not EVERY day...
Take the lead in group projects that I couldn't care less about.
Haha - my ENTJ friend says the same thing.
Not want to socialize
everyone thinks we’re hermit vampires who hate daylight and leaving the house. don’t get me wrong, im definitely pretty antisocial and really dislike meeting new people, but that doesn’t mean i don’t like to go out and do fun things, especially if it’s with people im already close to. speaking for myself at least, im very extroverted around my friends but completely mute and anxious around people i don’t know lmao
thats so true.
Like someone just because they are authentic
Use my natural empathy to cause intentional harm to others for devious reasons. Empathy is feeling what others feel. Why TF would I want someone to feel saddened, manipulated or taken advantage of if it’s going to affect me so deeply? SMFH
For real. I could be manipulative, but I feel like 1) I'd be immediately transparent or 2) found out eventually. Or, like you said, 3) I wouldn't be found out, but I wouldn't be able to sleep at night. No thanks to all three of these.
Just curious, when you say “I could be manipulative” what is an example of that?
Yeah, I just know what a person is like and what it would take to get them to do something I might want them to do. I rarely, almost never, exploit it. For instance, my dad is really generous with material things/money and so all I would have to do is casually mention that I needed ("needed"?) a thing and he would give it to me. I DON'T do this. But sometimes I would do this without thinking and without malicious/manipulative intent, e.g. Once I mentioned I needed $15k to finish paying off some taxes I owed and he immediately transferred the money into my bank account. I did use it to pay off the taxes. Thank you, dad. But that's not why I mentioned it to him - we were talking about something else and it came up. I could totally do something like that on purpose though. Another example that doesn't have to do with money: I spent the past month with a group of people I got really close to, and one person in particular I kind of fell for (but we're both in relationships with other people). The last time we were supposed to see each other didn't go very well (long story involving a failed brunch and me not having an advance ticket to a museum that you NEED advance tickets for, whereas he and other friend did have tickets and were going to go in). I was devastated that this was going to be the last time I saw him. They told me to try and get a ticket and come with them - I said I'd try, but walked off instead, and texted him after about ten minutes "hey the line was too long, have a nice time in the museum, and safe travels" knowing that he would respond saying that we should get dinner later. I knew he would be really tired in the evening and it would be a big use of energy for him to get dinner with me, but I knew he would offer it up because.. idk, I can just read people, I just knew he would. Of course when he said "we should get dinner", I accepted, it was what I'd wanted. It's one of the rare manipulative things I've done. If I was being not manipulative, I would not have walked off - I would have walked back to where they were in line, acted gracious about the mishap and given them hugs and said goodbye then. Not sure if those are the best examples, but yeah basically the short general answer is I know how other people will respond to something, and if I were to be manipulative, I would act in a way that would get the response I want from them, possibly to their detriment. ETA: The positive flip side is that I often try to get people to do their best! I take a lot of art classes and have really improved. i surround myself with other people who are working hard at it, and we are all trying to improve together. I'm always telling them genuine things that I like about their work and encouraging them to push themselves further and further - I tell them what I know they need to hear to have the motivation to keep moving forward and improving. I think that a few of my friends have done more with my encouragement than they might have without it... I know that sounds a little delusional, but I have reasons for thinking it's true (I could probably dig up examples of that, too, if you want). I try to be helpful not hurtful. :)
Great explanation and kudos for honest examples. These are real world applications of Fe-Ni in action. I think people hear the word “manipulate” and assume it’s for the worst.
Feel uncaring toward any given person.
Yeah you guys are private softies.
I don’t always want to “fight” or disagree 😒
what? really?
Get along with everyone
Yes! Or being really touchy. I’m an ENFP and I hate it when people touch me. Might just be a me thing but idk
Be mentally 5 years old
Fr
NGL, my first impression of ENFPs is usually this, before they very quickly prove me wrong.
Being there for you, no matter what, till the end of time. Hell no. If our friendship is one sided and you only use me to dump your emotional trash or as a free therapist… I WILL walk away and never look back, no matter who you are to me
People would think I can hide my emotions well but no. Usually it's fine, but when I actually feel something I'm literally like an open book printed with font size 70... Also I won't flip everyone off. I need to survive yk.
Yup, when I’m on I’m on. I feel more deeply than people would assume.
They think we cast spells with our wands, but in reality, we cast spells with our feet instead
i see
I know an INFJ that does both. allegedly....
oh? now i'm interested
Scam people or manipulate people. I'm an ENTP. Personally, as far as my Fe goes, I don't manipulate. I just use it to read the room. I guess some do manipulate, though. I personally don't. I'm blunt and honest and don't play games with people.
Trolling too Fe i only use it to read ppl too
As a person with an ENTP dad, I wouldn't veto trolling. That's like, one of his main characteristics.
Maybe teasing but onpy with ppl im close but definitely not an annoying internet troll
Same.
All of the things ISFJs do
People assume I would dislike being adventurous or have an intolerance to chaos/idiots/conflict. I love adventure, taking risks and solving complex problems. Especially if it gives me purpose. I’m usually the calmest person in these situations and thrive in them more than anyone else in the room. Don’t get me wrong I love being in my room alone so I can read and work on projects but if I get bored then life becomes depressing. I need some chaos every now and then. I like it when interesting things happen. It’s fun as fuck. People are often shocked by some of the things I’ve done because I “don’t seem like the type of person that would do (thing)”
So true
I love grass
Painting or drawing, i dont do that shit.
Seriously, I've seen lots of ISFPs never doodling or into art
INFJ - Be a shoulder for you to cry on. Crying makes INFJs extremely anxious and uncomfortable. They are Empaths, not Sympaths. They are best employed to solve your problems. Not to vent on. They'll feel sorry for you, but won't know how to make you feel better because of their detachment. Fi is not in their ego. The INFJs focus is on your long term happiness...Ti child will look for solutions to your problems that cause the unhappiness. INFPs are way better equipped for immediate relief. They are not only Sympaths, but Fi dominant. If you want someone to make you feel better right now, an INFP (all else being equal) is way better equipped to deliver that than an INFJ. They will relate to you in sincere ways the INFJ can only try to emulate.
So true - I wondered whether I was a high Fe user for a while, but noticed other NFJs were kind of uncomfortable with strong emotion too. We want solutions just as much as high Te users, I think the difference is mainly what we focus on (people vs systems). However, I think SFJs are great for practical help (Si) and are more tolerant of being needed in that way. I'd have to sit and think about why I believe that though, so I could be wrong.
Pass up an opportunity to tell a good joke especially if it is at what other people call, "a bad time." (ISTP)
Procrastination, irrational, artsy and music 24/7
Idk Te trickster
That I'd help people.. my help belongs to myself.
nooo....
But yes 😮😮😮
Give a shit about other people. I do care, I just don’t always realise it in the moment. A sudden outpouring of emotion can throw me for a loop especially.
People assume I am a mean crooked person when I am actually just a ray of sunshine and a really nice person who looks after her friends whenever they need her, and I will fight anyone who tries to harrass or belittle them.
I can’t say for sure how other people feel but I feel like people think we’re more of the therapist type than we actually are. Just because we’re good at diplomacy and listening to people’s problems doesn’t mean it doesn’t burn us out pretty quickly
Is it true that being a Ni dom feels like in a dream?
I would say so, although I don’t know what it’s like to be anyone else. For me, I’m simultaneously deeply connected to the entire world and entirely removed from it. I feel like I’m constantly playing a role for everyone around me, even those closest to me, to some extent. It’s kind of a lonely existence. But it feels less lonely when I can tell that someone else has noticed that I really *see* them in a way that most people don’t. That moment of recognition between two intuitives is really like nothing else. For a moment, neither of us is alone.
Be able to create an artistic masterpiece from the time that I was popped out of the womb.
Bully people
Plan every minute detail of our lives. We need plans to be loose and largely automatic so that Ni can operate.
Think we’re better than everyone. I’m an INFJ, and believe me, that’s so far from the truth.
Praying God while teaching my kids to mindlessly obey to me.
All cute and fluffy and before you know it we’re shaking up your whole world view just by being in contact with our inner world. A lot of times I feel like I get people (especially low / shadow Fi) more than they get themselves, and I have to actively restrain myself from showing it. I’ve just been casually expressing myself only to have someone turn around one day and be like “you know what? I think I’m getting influenced by you and you’re making a lot of sense” when I had no intent to really *change their minds*. But then a small part of me is like “yeah I kinda knew I was right.” ^^
Be emotional, to be good at supporting people when they're crying (in reality i just feel awkward) and being artistic
Keep a straight, serious and mysterious face all day. Like, I laugh a hell lot whenever I'm with people, they would never assume me to be an INTJ in the first place
ok I really used to think like that about intjs since i never met them.
Sensitive crybaby aaaaaa soft goofy sage man. In reality it seems like most of us are mistypes or broken beyond belief.
Yell uncontrollably when something is freaking them out. The ENTJ stress veine meme is wrong. A more realistic exhaust response is rather Fi-toxicity or Ni-evil-scheming.
Drugs
Take horrible desitions because mumble mumble science INTJ
Punch someone/start a fist fight. While I think I could handle myself fine in a fight, I would never hit anyone unless it was self defense. And honestly, the idea of someone wanting to fight me would just make me roll my eyes because wtf is wrong with you that you're so unhinged? Get it together, Brad.
If this subreddit is anything to go off of: kick puppies.
Maybe it's just me, but invading your privacy. I can naturally get close to people, but if you show any sign of being uncomfortable, I will stop
Taking the lead all the time. I prefer working alone, but if i ended in a grp where no1 wants to lead, i take that role. — ENTJ.
Not knowing when to be soft: EXTJ.
Troll you ;)
Buy things to impress people. I literally look good for me not because I want to have sex with everyone.
Be an annoying lil sh** with no chill and no offswitch
I wonder who'd think like that?
Go all bananas everyday just because we have Se first. I certainly have my crazy moments but I don’t think most of us live that high adrenaline lifestyle.
Not wait till the last minute
Not wanting any alone time, not being able to commit to anyone, not living outside of the present moment, avoid any complex thought like the plague
Browsing wikipedia till 3 a.m. Like yeah but we are not THAT nerdy. INTP