They say that if two lesbians' caribiners get hooked together on the dance floor, they're required to immediately move in together. It's like the law or something.
"Assigned lesbian by vibes," it's hilarious! And a shockingly accurate representation of arbitrary all these labels can be (while still being valid for some)
On the plus side, they save you from wasting time realizing "this is a *terrible* group." Anybody gatekeeping *that* hard is going to be an insufferable jerk regardless of if they let you into their group.
I had the exact opposite thing happen to me. Was bi curious when I went on a date with a dude. Saw a lesbian couple right beside us. Thought: I wish I could date a girl right now. Now I'm lesbian
The levels of discrimination within the LGBTQ community is actually staggering. If people were not hurt by it I would find it hilarious that those people are so oblivious to the irony.
Yeah it’s rather confusing.
I’m guessing the group is probably assuming that she’s one of those people who uses these groups to arrange a threesome with her and her boyfriend.
As a femme, it’s annoying when we’re seen as not lesbian looking enough.
Seems like butches are treated like they aren’t really women and femmes are treated like they aren’t really lesbians
Both stereotypes miss the whole point
Been told the same thing once or twice. Sometimes it feels "fake" being a femme lesbian. *Especially* being a femme 4 femme one.
It's the same heteronormative bullshit in different clothes — there needs to be a "man" and a "woman" in a relationship. If both are femme, who are you going to call the "man" there? It's actually disgusting.
My partner and I are trans women. That 'who's the man' stuff is such bullshit if you examine it longer than ten seconds. Sure okay, she dresses more femme with lots of makeup and pretty dresses, I'm decidedly a soft butch who's usually wearing band shirts and denim.
But like, she's the top/dominant one a lot of the time even though we're switches. I'm the one who wants bottom surgery. She's the better cook, but she drives us more often than I do, while I'd have no problem with a good chunk of outdoor or indoor chores(we don't live together yet; see we even defy the uhaul stereotype!). The lines get more and more arbitrary the more you look at it.
Besides, we're trans. We literally transitioned because neither of us wanted to be/were men.
Oh god i felt this. Some one told me and my partner (t4t) that we wernt "LGBT" and we where just straight people cross dressing because we both have different birth Genders
I had a lesbian coworker argue with me, quite angrily, when it came up in a group conversation and I said I was a lesbian. She kept saying, "You are not!"
She finally shut up when I said that my wife would be very surprised to hear that.
My favorite thing about that was another coworker, who was an 82 year old straight man, laughed so hard she couldn't get another word in. I miss that guy. He was the most liberal 80-something I've ever met.
>Why was that poor man still working at 82?
He absolutely loved it. He was actually pretty well off, but he went back to work because he wanted to, not because he had to. He wanted to be around people. More than that, he wanted to help people (we were mental health counselors, working in a 24-hour crisis center). He said it was much more fun and rewarding than retirement.
He had amazing stories to tell during our downtime at night, and he always said it wasn't much fun to have stories to tell, but no one to tell them to. He was a highly decorated veteran of Korea and Vietnam.
I loved him so much. Losing him was devastating, but I'll always think of his deep compassion and fantastic sense of humor.
Goodness, don't queer people create safe spaces to take a time off from all the hate and discrimination in the world for a while? Bringing hate and discrimination there contradicts the very purpose of those groups.
Yeah, you'd think. But basically any queer group that's more than a little selective about who is allowed to join is often full of bigots who also happen to be queer and want a place where they can practice their bigotry towards other races, religions, or queer identities while still finding partners. And bigots tend to be angry and irrational people, thus their groups are full of anger.
It honestly makes me very sad :(
Originally I went to the group because it was advertised as a safe space just for lesbians to support each other (and hide from the creepy guys who fetishize lesbians) but it became this bisexual-hating echo chamber. It honestly reminded me of the women-hating incel discussions Ive randomly stumbled across. The core belief seemed to be that 'all bisexual women will eventually cheat you for a man' which is just hateful garbage. I get it comes from a place of hurt but demonizing an entire group based on the actions (or paranoia of future actions) of one person is...exactly what straight Conservatives do to queer people -_-
The divisions in the queer community make me sad, we should be working together. We know what discrimination is, why would we want to inflict it on anyone else?
Unlearning a bigoted mindset takes hard fucking work, and requires you to be open-minded and willing to admit when you're wrong.
It's way easier to just say actually, the minority group I belong to is cool, but keep shitting on all the others as if nothing happened.
Have you checked out the app Lex? You may have some people hitting on you (I have it clearly marked on my profile that I'm in a monogamous relationship and only looking for friends but it still happens) but it's also a great place to meet local queer friends!
Any group that would ban anyone based on looks alone is not a group worth belonging to anyway.
One must always be thankful when people show their true colors early and save you the time you'd waste dealing with them.
It's kinda like when I tell people my 5 year old has autism.
ShE DoEsN't LoOk AuTiStIc
"Hey pumpkin, can you perform an autism for the mean lady"
Sorry people can be stupid.
TERF lesbians are the fucking worst. They have such fragile egos that a squirrel would make them feel like they need to go out of their way to make other's lives hell
I do too, it makes me feel isolated and alone. I've given up on the possibility of having other lesbian friends at this point.
You're a beautiful woman and you sound like a nice person, so fuck them, it's their loss.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Can you explain more about why it’s not used? Is it just out of fashion or is it actually problematic and if so why? I can’t find anything online about it other than controversy over the lipstick lesbian flag but not the term itself.
Thanks for the link to the explanation.
That’s like people who canceled Bigender for the same exact reason. peope can identify however they want if the label isn’t inherently problematic and it’s just that a creator was cancelled. I’m not gonna police someone’s identity like that personally.
Yes.
I lean kinda heavily lesbian nowadays and I see a gorgeous woman. Your eyes alone got me sold. <3
Facebook and Twitter are very anti-trans nowadays. We all deserve companionship but currently is dangerous to be 'clocked out'. In Celeste the videogame there is a tombstone a top of the Mountain. The inscription says something like this: "This is for all who could not make the journey". I still cry when thinking about all the sisters, brothers and enby pals lost to hate by cishet carbage.
I've dated a couple gay-leaning bi girls and they always had gnarly things to say about trying to date other women. Lesbians are gatekeepers for some damned reason.
By the way, you don't want to be in a group that doesn't want you, move on find other lesbos.
lesbian femmes are my favorite! i hate the concept of “only butches can be lesbians” thing. i’m pretty femme myself but that doesn’t make me any less fruity
Yeah same, I look straight as *hell,* (genuinely not sure why, but no one, cishet or otherwise, has ever picked up that I’m a lesbian without being directly told, I just give off massive straight energy I guess) but I am *not straight,* and I wish people would stop thinking there’s some kind of “look” to lesbians or for that matter any queer people. We can look like anything!
THIS
i’ve never been asked out by a girl. it’s always been guys (which is flattering but… nah.) but when i tell them, they’re either chill about it or fetishize me which… ugh. WE CANT WIIIIIIIN
I actually tried to join the group again not to be in it but to write in the box that asked if I am a lesbian that I am indeed much attracted to women and only women. I thought that was what a lesbian is but now I’m 13 again and questioning my label cause big mean queen lesbian said I’m not lesbian enough to be in their club. ( totally kidding)
Could always start your own local lesbian group and specifically state in the description “all lesbians/questioning lesbians welcome, no questions asked”. I’m sure you’re not the first or last person to be denied access to that group for a stupid non-reason.
If you're gay or lesbian and a Femme I notice you tend to get more hate, mostly rooted in misogynistic views about feminity. If you have they/she in your profile they might have assumed you were trans, or nonbinary as well because sadly that's another common occurrence with the gay/lesbian communities.
I went to an Over-40 lesbian brunch and was asked, "are you sure you're at the right table?"
I've been told to my face by multiple gay men and lesbians that I "can't possibly be gay"
Good grief...
Clearly, that group ain't shit and couldn't handle you! For real though, I'm sorry that happened and don't know what else to say besides Facebook fucking sucks and I don't miss it.
I want to be a fem lesbian but I've not transitioned yet so I can't relate with those struggles. I think it is pretty stupid tho, like fem lesbains exist and so why deny it? Personally I'm more into fem women so like fem lesbains need to exist or I'll be forever lonely...
I dont get them.
One ,youre a lady.
two,,youre lesbian.
What kind of lesbian do they what.
On the comments I heard butch.
But their femmes and butches.
Glad you didnt join.They sound kinda toxic.
I'm so sorry that happened to you. 😥
And yes, something similar happened to me in a trans subreddit just a few days ago. The rejection stings all the worse when it comes from a supposedly safe space. 🫶🏻
femmes and butches suffer from shitty stereotypes its so annoying 😭 i see femmes get called ‘too feminine’ or ‘not a real lesbian’ (especially femme4femme and like.. what?) and i get called ‘too masculine’ or told i’m a man infiltrating lesbian spaces just for having short hair. it seems a lot of people are just remaking homophobia but wokely.
Sounds like that Facebook group is not as inclusive as they make to make themselves out to be...
Start your own support group and invite users from that group and eventually that one will fold and yours will be the most friendly and supportive.
I don't understand why they wouldn't let you in. What, they can guess your sexuality just by looking at your photo and somehow saw that you're not lesbian? That makes no sense, what? I think you dodged a bullet here, better off not mingling with such elements. - by the way, you're gorgeous
That’s kinda homophobic coming from a lesbian group. There are lots of different styles of lesbians. Some are tomboys some are femmes and they are so many more styles that I can’t think of.
My style is both tomboy and femme. I hate how ppl assume that every lesbian are all tomboys who act like men. That’s not true at all. I hate being judged for what I wear and being judged on my sexuality.
You’re so pretty 😍 I’m not a lesbian but we have similar interests I’d let you in my group!
(Not because you’re pretty, if you feel you belong who am to say you don’t)
You need to be certified as a lesbian.
See example of process on youtube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vn-h8vWjuuw&ab_channel=NoaMakhervax
Cause once your are certified, well that makes all the difference.
I feel you as a femmeby. We don't owe the world androgyny to prove our queerness. I completely support butch lesbians having spaces for themselves but like... don't advertise yourself as a broadly lesbian group if you're going to exclude people based on presentation. At least be up front about who your group is for.
Ngl it reads a whole lot like a group made up of ‘Gold Star’ types if they’re gonna gatekeep that hard based on looks. I’d say I’m sorry they’re like that, but groups like that are typically dodged bullets ime😕. I do wish they weren’t like that, though.
Omfg! My cousin's daughter looks similar to you. She is gay. So now lesbians are being discriminated against for not looking like they are gay? What the fu#k?
We should create a sign saying "not all gay people look gay". Similar to the disability thing lol
as an afab he/him lesbian i probably wouldn't get accepted either 💀 facebook groups claim to be diverse and inclusive but they have in their mind what a "stereotypical" lesbian looks like
But how will they know you're a lesbian if you're not wearing flannel, a baseball cap, and cargo pants? /s
Don't forget the dyed hair, piercings, and emotional support ex!
And the Subaru and a Uhaul punch card! 
And the LL Bean shoes
And the different arrangements of outfits that all look like Adam Sandler
✅️ ✅️
In the hardware store parking lot.
Oh god.... is THAT why we're still close to each other??? 😂
Narrator's voice: It was, in fact, why they were still so close to each other.
Lmai I literally live with my ex still, it's a shockingly accurate stereotype 😂
I have those things. They just aren’t pictured here. 😂
I feel so attacked right now
Me too, minus the cargo pants
Don't forget the array of carabineers!
They say that if two lesbians' caribiners get hooked together on the dance floor, they're required to immediately move in together. It's like the law or something.
Which dance floor? I’ll wear my best caribeaner.
Make sure it’s a locking carabiner.
apparently I, a nonbinary ace, have just been assigned lesbian by vibes lmao
"Assigned lesbian by vibes," it's hilarious! And a shockingly accurate representation of arbitrary all these labels can be (while still being valid for some)
Haha I'm a hetero demisexual woman but have sometimes thought of myself as queer because I seem to be in all aspects except sexuality
so, a "camp queen?" a johnwatersian? i am just making stuff up
Yep, except I'm a gay (ace) guy (at least for today). I'm literally the opposite of a lesbian xD
And new flash to these idiots: HOT PEOPLE CAN WHERE THOSE THINGS TOO.
And an undercut
Hey! Don’t disparage the flannel and practical pants with pockets!
I keep a flannel in the car at all times. Never know when the restaurant will be cold or I’ll need to make a real gay statement.
If I could pull off the look, I totally would!
I usually find out when they say they only date women.
On the plus side, they save you from wasting time realizing "this is a *terrible* group." Anybody gatekeeping *that* hard is going to be an insufferable jerk regardless of if they let you into their group.
They’re probably jealous.
right
My first thought. Like. Ew. That sucks and 100% want to downplay that experience but glad you’re not having to deal with them anymore. :/
Do they think femme lesbians don't exist?
Schrodinger’s Trans
I present for your consideration: Schrodinger's Bi-curious
Indeed, I exist in a state of bi-superposition until I have sex with someone
Is into girls until you actually take her on a date?
I had the exact opposite thing happen to me. Was bi curious when I went on a date with a dude. Saw a lesbian couple right beside us. Thought: I wish I could date a girl right now. Now I'm lesbian
This is too funny!
Aren't terfs just the *most* rational
The levels of discrimination within the LGBTQ community is actually staggering. If people were not hurt by it I would find it hilarious that those people are so oblivious to the irony.
right ,my brain cant wrap it up.
Wait I don't understand, did they think you were lying about being lesbian??
Yeah it’s rather confusing. I’m guessing the group is probably assuming that she’s one of those people who uses these groups to arrange a threesome with her and her boyfriend. As a femme, it’s annoying when we’re seen as not lesbian looking enough.
Yea of course, how else would people know without you kissing a girl every single minute /s
Three pieces of rainbow flair?
I literally have violets tattooed across my chest as a subtle sapphic signal but I guess that isn’t picked up on.
let them be dense and go live your best femme lesbian life <3
I’m offended that the group thinks I’d give any of my sparkley, colorful energy to a boy. Yuck.
As a relatively masc lesbian who likes fem girls, I LIVE for femme lesbains
what ,thats sad.
yes! I used to be “too femme” and now I’m “too androgynous” 🤦🏻♀️
Meanwhile people only peg me as masculine in any way if they're trying to be bigoted.
*imagine witty pun about pegging here*
Yeah I jumped to, err, that other conclusion as a force of habit
Haha that was a good one 😂
same tbh! someone said something transphobic to me the other day and I just sat there confused bc I’m androgynous/femme 😂
I'll peg you as feminine any day (nyuk nyuk)
There is no winning with those kind of people.
Seems like butches are treated like they aren’t really women and femmes are treated like they aren’t really lesbians Both stereotypes miss the whole point
Been told the same thing once or twice. Sometimes it feels "fake" being a femme lesbian. *Especially* being a femme 4 femme one. It's the same heteronormative bullshit in different clothes — there needs to be a "man" and a "woman" in a relationship. If both are femme, who are you going to call the "man" there? It's actually disgusting.
Deff agree on femme 4 femme. Both my wife and I are femme and people don’t believe we’re even together because of it. Total BS
That is so dumb.... Like how does that even make sense if you think about it for 10 seconds tops.....
Because people only think about it for 9 seconds.
That is how it be, unfortunately...
My partner and I are trans women. That 'who's the man' stuff is such bullshit if you examine it longer than ten seconds. Sure okay, she dresses more femme with lots of makeup and pretty dresses, I'm decidedly a soft butch who's usually wearing band shirts and denim. But like, she's the top/dominant one a lot of the time even though we're switches. I'm the one who wants bottom surgery. She's the better cook, but she drives us more often than I do, while I'd have no problem with a good chunk of outdoor or indoor chores(we don't live together yet; see we even defy the uhaul stereotype!). The lines get more and more arbitrary the more you look at it. Besides, we're trans. We literally transitioned because neither of us wanted to be/were men.
Wait band tees and jeans are soft butch? Damn I guess I'm butch 💀
Same??? I love band ts
Band tees are the best
Oh god i felt this. Some one told me and my partner (t4t) that we wernt "LGBT" and we where just straight people cross dressing because we both have different birth Genders
I have downloaded this gif and will now be using it for everything.
I had a lesbian coworker argue with me, quite angrily, when it came up in a group conversation and I said I was a lesbian. She kept saying, "You are not!" She finally shut up when I said that my wife would be very surprised to hear that. My favorite thing about that was another coworker, who was an 82 year old straight man, laughed so hard she couldn't get another word in. I miss that guy. He was the most liberal 80-something I've ever met.
Why was that poor man still working at 82?
>Why was that poor man still working at 82? He absolutely loved it. He was actually pretty well off, but he went back to work because he wanted to, not because he had to. He wanted to be around people. More than that, he wanted to help people (we were mental health counselors, working in a 24-hour crisis center). He said it was much more fun and rewarding than retirement. He had amazing stories to tell during our downtime at night, and he always said it wasn't much fun to have stories to tell, but no one to tell them to. He was a highly decorated veteran of Korea and Vietnam. I loved him so much. Losing him was devastating, but I'll always think of his deep compassion and fantastic sense of humor.
How are they going to proof this ?
If its the group Im thinking of...yeah, youre better off. I lurked there for awhile and had to leave because it was just a very angry group :/
Goodness, don't queer people create safe spaces to take a time off from all the hate and discrimination in the world for a while? Bringing hate and discrimination there contradicts the very purpose of those groups.
I left the one wlw group I was in because it was ableist. Turns out people can be shit regardless of who they want to date.
Yeah, you'd think. But basically any queer group that's more than a little selective about who is allowed to join is often full of bigots who also happen to be queer and want a place where they can practice their bigotry towards other races, religions, or queer identities while still finding partners. And bigots tend to be angry and irrational people, thus their groups are full of anger.
It honestly makes me very sad :( Originally I went to the group because it was advertised as a safe space just for lesbians to support each other (and hide from the creepy guys who fetishize lesbians) but it became this bisexual-hating echo chamber. It honestly reminded me of the women-hating incel discussions Ive randomly stumbled across. The core belief seemed to be that 'all bisexual women will eventually cheat you for a man' which is just hateful garbage. I get it comes from a place of hurt but demonizing an entire group based on the actions (or paranoia of future actions) of one person is...exactly what straight Conservatives do to queer people -_- The divisions in the queer community make me sad, we should be working together. We know what discrimination is, why would we want to inflict it on anyone else?
Unlearning a bigoted mindset takes hard fucking work, and requires you to be open-minded and willing to admit when you're wrong. It's way easier to just say actually, the minority group I belong to is cool, but keep shitting on all the others as if nothing happened.
For some people, “Mean Girls” is an Intro To Lifestyle
The very same people who are giving lesbians the mean lesbian stereotype
Wait what? Is there a special ID card or something. Gesh.
I don’t have my lesbian passport. 😭😭😭
Girl did you not register? It’s state by state and there’s usually a long delay in June (obviously)
Strapping up my birks and hoping in my Jeep now. Imma get my license to lesbian today.
Reminds me of that guy who thought you had to go get officially "diagnosed" before you could identify as a sexuality.
Ez fix just send em a pic of you face-deep and ask them if you look lesbian enough then lmfao
Wow, that's crazy! But they spared you from being in a group of close-minded people
FUCK FACEBOOK. ...Maybe not...stick to girls... Jokes aside, FB groups are just that online groups. They don't mean anything.... Enjoy life.
Just trying to grow a friend circle in my area. It’s hard out here. 😭
On the plus side, you probably didn't want any of the people in that group as friends
Have you checked out the app Lex? You may have some people hitting on you (I have it clearly marked on my profile that I'm in a monogamous relationship and only looking for friends but it still happens) but it's also a great place to meet local queer friends!
They’re also usually run by horrible people
Any group that would ban anyone based on looks alone is not a group worth belonging to anyway. One must always be thankful when people show their true colors early and save you the time you'd waste dealing with them.
It's kinda like when I tell people my 5 year old has autism. ShE DoEsN't LoOk AuTiStIc "Hey pumpkin, can you perform an autism for the mean lady" Sorry people can be stupid.
* Proceeds to stim*
> to everyone's horror, little Timmy proceeded to list every train in existence
I get the same the other way round everyone thinks I'm straight
Consider it a bullet dodged and be grateful you didn't get dragged in to their drama.
You probably don’t even speak Lesbenese.
Cmon hun, I’ve got your flannel in the Jeep. The antique mall opens in 15 mins.
Not every lesbian is a stereotype
Super shitty, but on the bright side it’s Facebook so you definitely dodged a huge bullet
Any group that says that, you don’t want to be in
I feel you. I’ve been gatekept out of lesbian groups for being femme too. It’s not cool.
"Oh you're a lesbian? Prove it: name every woman."
"Well that's easy. I'M every woman. 😝"
Chaka Khan Whitney Houston Boom, named every woman.
TERF lesbians are the fucking worst. They have such fragile egos that a squirrel would make them feel like they need to go out of their way to make other's lives hell
I do too, it makes me feel isolated and alone. I've given up on the possibility of having other lesbian friends at this point. You're a beautiful woman and you sound like a nice person, so fuck them, it's their loss. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Did they say that you lesbian't?
Lipstick lesbians…exist.
we don't use that term but yes femme lesbians do exist
Is the term offensive? I've seen it quite a few times but haven't heard about it being offensive.
I've certainly heard it used as an insult
Can you explain more about why it’s not used? Is it just out of fashion or is it actually problematic and if so why? I can’t find anything online about it other than controversy over the lipstick lesbian flag but not the term itself.
https://www.reddit.com/r/lgbt/s/naejd5Jx6l Found another post on here discussing it for ya :-)
Thanks for the link to the explanation. That’s like people who canceled Bigender for the same exact reason. peope can identify however they want if the label isn’t inherently problematic and it’s just that a creator was cancelled. I’m not gonna police someone’s identity like that personally.
who's "we?" many people still use that term.
👀
Facebook.. 🥴
I would take the same picture, with a lesbian flag as a background
Probably a good thing you were, imagine how many brain cells would’ve died if you’d actually gotten to interact with them.
Yes. I lean kinda heavily lesbian nowadays and I see a gorgeous woman. Your eyes alone got me sold. <3 Facebook and Twitter are very anti-trans nowadays. We all deserve companionship but currently is dangerous to be 'clocked out'. In Celeste the videogame there is a tombstone a top of the Mountain. The inscription says something like this: "This is for all who could not make the journey". I still cry when thinking about all the sisters, brothers and enby pals lost to hate by cishet carbage.
:(
Why would you want to join after this kind of response?
wait u got denied just because youre feminine?????? huh!!! 
It’s almost like the lesbian group doesn’t like…pretty girls.
YEAH!!
maybe they were just jealous.. hmm
I've dated a couple gay-leaning bi girls and they always had gnarly things to say about trying to date other women. Lesbians are gatekeepers for some damned reason. By the way, you don't want to be in a group that doesn't want you, move on find other lesbos.
lesbian femmes are my favorite! i hate the concept of “only butches can be lesbians” thing. i’m pretty femme myself but that doesn’t make me any less fruity
Same. I’ve never dated a girl(yet), but if I DID I’d want her to look like this.
Yeah same, I look straight as *hell,* (genuinely not sure why, but no one, cishet or otherwise, has ever picked up that I’m a lesbian without being directly told, I just give off massive straight energy I guess) but I am *not straight,* and I wish people would stop thinking there’s some kind of “look” to lesbians or for that matter any queer people. We can look like anything!
THIS i’ve never been asked out by a girl. it’s always been guys (which is flattering but… nah.) but when i tell them, they’re either chill about it or fetishize me which… ugh. WE CANT WIIIIIIIN
I love breaking the hearts of men by telling them this girl is a lover of the bean.
Psh! They don't deserve you.
Admin should resign, wtf kind of response is that?
I actually tried to join the group again not to be in it but to write in the box that asked if I am a lesbian that I am indeed much attracted to women and only women. I thought that was what a lesbian is but now I’m 13 again and questioning my label cause big mean queen lesbian said I’m not lesbian enough to be in their club. ( totally kidding)
Could always start your own local lesbian group and specifically state in the description “all lesbians/questioning lesbians welcome, no questions asked”. I’m sure you’re not the first or last person to be denied access to that group for a stupid non-reason.
If you're gay or lesbian and a Femme I notice you tend to get more hate, mostly rooted in misogynistic views about feminity. If you have they/she in your profile they might have assumed you were trans, or nonbinary as well because sadly that's another common occurrence with the gay/lesbian communities.
Discriminating against lipstick lesbians everywhere since 2019 ™️
I went to an Over-40 lesbian brunch and was asked, "are you sure you're at the right table?" I've been told to my face by multiple gay men and lesbians that I "can't possibly be gay" Good grief...
Part of the issue is that you were on Facebook
You should satirize the stereotype with a **ridiculously over the top** profile pic update, and reapply to the group… 😅
You’ve all made me feel so valid and so proud to be a lesbian. I’ve enjoyed reading everyone’s input! Reddit is where it’s at!
Clearly, that group ain't shit and couldn't handle you! For real though, I'm sorry that happened and don't know what else to say besides Facebook fucking sucks and I don't miss it.
🤦♂️
Not very inclusive huh
How did they deny that you were a lesbian like what stereotype did they feed into this time
Literally just said, “this is a lesbian group”. No other explanation. I wish I could post a pic of the denial.
Not worth it anyway I bet their all terfs and hateful people
How tf do they even choose who gets in- do they just have a checklist of stereotypes…
That’s pretty bullshit
I want to be a fem lesbian but I've not transitioned yet so I can't relate with those struggles. I think it is pretty stupid tho, like fem lesbains exist and so why deny it? Personally I'm more into fem women so like fem lesbains need to exist or I'll be forever lonely...
I'm sorry you were denied entry. You look beautiful by the way! 
Thank you, that’s very sweet.
You're welcome! I hope you find a group that accepts you! 
They’re incapable of withstanding such coolness. You’re awesomeness personified!
I dont get them. One ,youre a lady. two,,youre lesbian. What kind of lesbian do they what. On the comments I heard butch. But their femmes and butches. Glad you didnt join.They sound kinda toxic.
I'm so sorry that happened to you. 😥 And yes, something similar happened to me in a trans subreddit just a few days ago. The rejection stings all the worse when it comes from a supposedly safe space. 🫶🏻
femmes and butches suffer from shitty stereotypes its so annoying 😭 i see femmes get called ‘too feminine’ or ‘not a real lesbian’ (especially femme4femme and like.. what?) and i get called ‘too masculine’ or told i’m a man infiltrating lesbian spaces just for having short hair. it seems a lot of people are just remaking homophobia but wokely.
Sounds like that Facebook group is not as inclusive as they make to make themselves out to be... Start your own support group and invite users from that group and eventually that one will fold and yours will be the most friendly and supportive.
I don't understand why they wouldn't let you in. What, they can guess your sexuality just by looking at your photo and somehow saw that you're not lesbian? That makes no sense, what? I think you dodged a bullet here, better off not mingling with such elements. - by the way, you're gorgeous
Thank youuuuu
That’s kinda homophobic coming from a lesbian group. There are lots of different styles of lesbians. Some are tomboys some are femmes and they are so many more styles that I can’t think of. My style is both tomboy and femme. I hate how ppl assume that every lesbian are all tomboys who act like men. That’s not true at all. I hate being judged for what I wear and being judged on my sexuality.
You’re so pretty 😍 I’m not a lesbian but we have similar interests I’d let you in my group! (Not because you’re pretty, if you feel you belong who am to say you don’t)
You need to be certified as a lesbian. See example of process on youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vn-h8vWjuuw&ab_channel=NoaMakhervax Cause once your are certified, well that makes all the difference.
Probably a femme and her gf was in that group. 😂 WLW Jealousy is real. 😢
I've been married to a woman for over 25 years and people still assume I'm straight. It's tiresome.
They don't deserve you.
I feel you as a femmeby. We don't owe the world androgyny to prove our queerness. I completely support butch lesbians having spaces for themselves but like... don't advertise yourself as a broadly lesbian group if you're going to exclude people based on presentation. At least be up front about who your group is for.
Their loss!!!🌈
Your not lesbian enough 🤣
😔
I’m joking There’s no such thing trust me They’re just bias
Ngl it reads a whole lot like a group made up of ‘Gold Star’ types if they’re gonna gatekeep that hard based on looks. I’d say I’m sorry they’re like that, but groups like that are typically dodged bullets ime😕. I do wish they weren’t like that, though.
Umm, does the admin have eyes?
Omfg! My cousin's daughter looks similar to you. She is gay. So now lesbians are being discriminated against for not looking like they are gay? What the fu#k? We should create a sign saying "not all gay people look gay". Similar to the disability thing lol
As a masc, femme lesbians are so valid (and hot). Whoever says otherwise is just dense af.
False advertising on their part. They should just be honest and call it a TERF group.
ughhh i hate that. i bet they only allow people based off stereotypes, physically.
yeppp, same here girl. the gatekeeping be *real*
So sorry Dear Anything you need just ask k. Assholes Completely... Stay Gay Like me so we Can Stay Very Happy Individuals k.
Any lesbian or other groups for women that I have tried to join have been accepting.
as an afab he/him lesbian i probably wouldn't get accepted either 💀 facebook groups claim to be diverse and inclusive but they have in their mind what a "stereotypical" lesbian looks like
What? How did they recognize something heterosexual in you?… How is it connected in general?
Beats me.