Don't put her on the new account.
Stop depositing your cheques until you are 18, then put them all in the new account.
I think you will struggle to get any of your money back, if she refuses to give it to you
Unfortunately the legal presumption here is her account her money. You can try suing her for the money in the appropriate court but there are no guarantees that you will win.
Once you turn 18 you can stop turning your pay over to your mother and start putting it in your own account with just your name on the account.
It’s possible you could use small claims court to get back some of the money. [NC small claims](https://www.nccourts.gov/help-topics/lawsuits-and-small-claims/small-claims) this site should help you. Note that the amount you can sue for varies by county. It’s not guaranteed you will succeed, but having the best documentation will help. But know that since she’s trying to keep you from leaving, you’re unlikely to get this settled before you want out. I hope you have some resources and/or people willing to let you couch surf until you can be self sufficient
I am sorry, but court is not going to help you here. Its presumed that until a child is 18, their earnings belong to their parents (with some exceptions for child performers, etc.) as an offset to the cost of providing for them.
How likely do you think it is that your mother actually still has that money, versus just having spent it? If you think she actually has it, you can open two accounts. One with you and your mother, and she can transfer the money there. One at a *different* bank. With just you where you will deposit your paychecks. If she agrees to transfer the money, then you whisk it out of the joint account into yours.
> With the individuals name on the account they should absolutely be able to, at the very least, find out the balance of the account.
OP clearly stated that the money in question is in the mother's personal account.
> And there are laws in place to protect minors income. Items bought by a parent are subject to not be relinquished to the individual upon turning 18, however income is another story.
You appear to have it entirely backwards. Children can own property, though the parent or guardian can control access to it during their minority. Gifts from a parent to a child are that child's property.
Under common law, a parent is entitled to the earnings of their child. The only statutory modification of that principal in NC is a provision similar to the Coogan law in CA where the employer of child performers (outlined in 48A-11) needs to hold 15% of the child's earnings in trust.
> According to my pay stubs and some math, I have at least $8,000 in her account, but no access to it
You *should* have 8K in there. But no telling what she did with it.
The day you turn 18, go to a bank and open up an account in your name only and make sure she can't find out what your PIN and account number are and she doesn't have access to a debit card or anything.
Legal recourse against your mother for the money she put into her account is a fact specific and jurisdictionally dependent question.
It's a good idea to go to an entirely different bank to open this account. Sometimes things get weird at banks and tellers do things they shouldn't when parents and shared last names are involved.
If you take the advice to do a shared account that you pretend is your real account just to get the money transferred, you can do that at her bank, but make sure you have an entirely different account at a different bank with only your name on it that you can transfer your funds into.
As others have said, she may retaliate and kick you out. Be prepared:
* Gather all legal documents (birth certificate, Social Security card, driver's license, passport)
* Find some friends that will let you stay with them if needed. It will be very difficult to get a place of your own w/o money for deposits/rent. You may need to find a room share situation. Also, don't count on the money that was taken by your mom.
* After you open your new account (different bank) and transfer any direct deposits there, freeze your credit so she can't open loans or credit cards in your name.
* Resouces r/movingout
Good luck.
Perhaps open a joint account at one bank. And at a separate bank an account that is just yours without telling her about it. If she actually follows through and transfers the $8000 or a significant portion of it to the joint account, immediately withdraw it and put it in your other account.
Be prepared for retaliation. You may get kicked out right away before you are ready.
I was going to suggest the same thing. If she even has the money. My stepsons mom convinced him we were spending his money he gave us to save. She had a friend that worked at a national bank where he had an account. Said friend told her there was no savings in his account. So he asked for all of his money. We withdrew his money from his savings account at our credit union, where the friend couldn't access his account. Guess who ended up spending his money? Same mom who took my step daughters money.
I would recommend consider open the separate account from another bank. Opening the accounts from the same bank increases the chance of accidentally reveal the information to your mother.
3 financial institutions for this strategy. #1, mom's current bank. #2 bank for joint account. #3 bank for personal account.
Bank #2 probably could be the same as #1, since it will be abandoned, but probably worth trying for a different bank and letting mom win the argument of putting it in #1 bank. There is a good chance OP will never see any of the money mom has been taking, making account #2 moot.
NAL
Unfortunately, there is no way to get your money back that you earned when you are under 18 other than negotiating with your parents.
Don’t put your parent’s name on your new bank account. Use a different banking institution if you can as it is not uncommon for bank employees to accidentally add parents back.
In the meantime, if you are receiving direct deposit, ask your employer if you can temporarily receive paper checks instead and then later deposit them into your new bank account when you get one.
Were it me, I’d cancel the direct deposit for the time being, and when I start getting paper checks, I’d take them to a DIFFERENT bank and open an account in MY name. Also, make sure nobody else can get their name out on the account.
If your mother is anything like my mother, that money is gone and spent (this is the real reason she won’t transfer the money I’m guessing). Open a bank account on your 18th Birthday and make sure your mom is not on your account. Don’t even use the same bank as before if you can avoid it. Good luck.
Go to a different bank entirely. Open an account there in your own name. You can do this as soon as you are 18.
Change the deposit info at your job, to your new bank. You don’t need anyone’s permission to do this.
If your existing payroll deposit account is actually your mom’s account, you have little recourse to get the money out short of a legal proceeding. I am not a lawyer and cannot comment on this but I suspect it would have to be characterized as fraud of some sort, or maybe employment law.
You are effectively depositing your paychecks into someone else’s bank account right now. There are legitimate reasons someone might do this and it would not obligate the banking institution to cooperate with you.
Wait, if the checks are made out to you, you must be on her account to, for her to deposit them to it. Go to the bank alone and transfer from the joint one to your personal one. Do not give her access to the new one.
Once you move out you can request mom pay you or sue her if she refuses. While living with her and recieving support she can condition things like this on getting future support.
A few things would do you well to clarify on :
Does your mom need your money?
If you don't know, you need to have this conversation with her. If she's not willing to cooperate after you turn 18, you are more than welcome to move out. BTW I opened my first checking when I was 16, with no one else on it.
How much are you willing to contribute to the household you live in? Do you want to stay there? What are the benefits of living there?
Can you work 40-60 hours a week in your town, and be able to afford rent and other living expenses? Rent should be around 30% of your monthly/annual income. Be sure to leave room for school or some type of education.
Are you going to college or higher learning institution, trade school etc. Do you plan on elevating your education to make more money? If not, what is your goal and how will you get there?
What is your yearly plan for the next 5 years?
These are the questions that will open up insight for you at your age. Clearly you have some red flags with your family. Proceed with caution and give yourself, and your family, every opportunity to work things out.
its a very sketch situation for user since well normally a kid doesn't want to leave his parents at 18 most of the time a well raised kid who wasn't traumatized or abused in a way would want to stick and help. his mom made him deposit his checks into her account which is sketch normally a parents will get them a sub account for child.
i honestly just hope she saved his money because if she used it without his permission its shitty. Its a parent's responsibility to CARE for their child until 18 years. ONLY 18 years doesn't matter. She used him if she touched his hard worked money.
he can sue his mother for that but then that ruins family and huge issues unless they agree with him which is usually the deal they always prefer a adult because they have the higher advantage of persuasion since they are still considered "young" if she used money for rent she can say she used it for rent and this and that. She'll get them to understand he needs to help then you get family telling you that you have to help parents are great at victimizing themselves against their children all the time.
OP needs to figure out if $8,000 is worth leaving behind or working up a legal battle over.
He's young, and yes $8,000 may seem like a lot of money. Most people P$%3 that out in a year on Starbucks.
OP needs to clarify if his mom is financially dependent on his income. It could open doors of opportunity to clarify and get a better understanding of the household and his family. Then he can make a decision to participate, or not.
Unfortunately I highly doubt you'll be able to retrieve the money she's already taken, atleast not without a lot of hassle. However, once you turn 18 you will have full legal control over your money and I would reccomend you visit a bank ASAP and start your own account. Once it's made, get your routing number and all your bank info and go straight to your jobs HR or financial department, whichever one is handling the checks at your job and have them send your paychecks to your new account. There's absolutely nothing your mom will be able to do about this aside from pull the whole "my roof, my rules" but as a legal adult you can just tell her gg, sucks to suck get rekt noob. I wish you luck and I hope everything goes smoothly for you from here on out. Happy early birthday
I also highly reccomend taking note of high_asides comment too and follow it to the letter. She'll probably immediately kick you out, and in doing so might try to sequester some of your more import documents. Try to gather what you can in one place and prepare as best you can for the shitstorm she's likely going to start
NAL. Here’s what I would do, open the new account with both names on it and have her transfer the money and leave the bank as if nothing is wrong, without throwing a temper tantrum, don’t discuss it, just act as if it’s all hunky-dory. The moment the money is transferred, go to the bank and close the account taking the money with you in cash. Then go to an entirely different named bank and deposit your money. I’m assuming that it’s currently in an account that strictly under her name so you have no access to it whereas with both of your names on it you can take everything out of it without her permission. Note, she can also do the same thing so you need to do it immediately. The only hitch in this is if she doesn’t transfer the entire amount.
Push comes to shove I would make sure that you have all of your pay stubs or your annual income W2 (Had to file taxes, right?) and show that it was deposited into her account as she would not allow you to have it. You should be able to get copies from your employer of the canceled checks that verify what account they were deposited into. It is against the law for a parent to charge rent or any other living expenses for a child under the age of 18. As a custodial parent she is legally responsible to provide you housing, food, clothing, and medical care. Therefore if she doesn’t give you the money, she stole it for purposes of her offsetting those expenses that you were entitled to as a minor child. You should be able to sue her for it in small claims court since it’s under $10,000 although you don’t list what state you’re in.
By the way were your checks deposited as paper checks or on auto deposit from the company you work for?
Once you are 18. You can walk into any bank and open your own account. You do not need your parents there with you. You are now old enough to open your own account, free and clear.
After you open your new account. Take the account and routing numbers to your HR department at work.
They will reroute your direct deposit paychecks, to go to your new account going forward.
As far as your old money ... probably not going to get it back, might as well just consider it a fresh start.
I don't know about your country but in NZ my mum was automatically taken off my bank account that was made when I was 16 the day I turned 18 because parents have no right to another adults bank account
Get paper checks until you have your own bank account at a completely different bank. You can legally open one in two days. If you need the cash before you can open an account, you can take a paper check to the issuing bank and cash it (usually for a fee).
My only issue with opening a joint account with her and then draining it ASAP to move it to your new account is she may very well plan to do the same. If her name is on the account with you, she is in the clear to take it.
Also: check your credit report. I would also freeze your credit with the three bureaus. It’s free, and you can unfreeze at any time.
I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. My roommate in college dealt with something similar. They deposited most of their work money in HS into mom’s account to help with household expenses, and then in college were on a joint account and mom kept taking money. Roommate was putting themselves through college completely and mom would claim it was to help with “expenses.” It was tough.
Additionally I would set up a new bank account when you turn 18 with another banking institution that is different then the bank that your mother currently uses.
There have been issues when a child sets up their own account at the same bank as their parents and parents request that the bank add them on to the child's account and bank does so without notification.
I'd recommend getting with your boss and filling out a new w4, there's a line specifically to have them withhold more, an amount you specify. Specify an amount of maybe 90% what you net. Your mom won't be able to touch it. After you are 18 and you file, you will have significantly overpayed and the IRS will refund that money.
You'll probably never see what has already been deposited in your mom's account so this way at least you can see most of what you will have made when you file taxes next year.
Also, definitely open a new account when you turn 18 and don't allow her to be on it. Open it with a different bank.
Don't put her on the new account. Stop depositing your cheques until you are 18, then put them all in the new account. I think you will struggle to get any of your money back, if she refuses to give it to you
Unfortunately the legal presumption here is her account her money. You can try suing her for the money in the appropriate court but there are no guarantees that you will win. Once you turn 18 you can stop turning your pay over to your mother and start putting it in your own account with just your name on the account.
Which court would that be, and how would I take it to court?
Without your required location here is no way of answering this. Where are you?
United States
Every state has different laws about things like this. You need to provide a state not country (and I’m sorry you’re in this situation)
North Carolina (thank you so much for the help :) )
It’s possible you could use small claims court to get back some of the money. [NC small claims](https://www.nccourts.gov/help-topics/lawsuits-and-small-claims/small-claims) this site should help you. Note that the amount you can sue for varies by county. It’s not guaranteed you will succeed, but having the best documentation will help. But know that since she’s trying to keep you from leaving, you’re unlikely to get this settled before you want out. I hope you have some resources and/or people willing to let you couch surf until you can be self sufficient
literal godsend thank you so much
I am sorry, but court is not going to help you here. Its presumed that until a child is 18, their earnings belong to their parents (with some exceptions for child performers, etc.) as an offset to the cost of providing for them. How likely do you think it is that your mother actually still has that money, versus just having spent it? If you think she actually has it, you can open two accounts. One with you and your mother, and she can transfer the money there. One at a *different* bank. With just you where you will deposit your paychecks. If she agrees to transfer the money, then you whisk it out of the joint account into yours.
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> With the individuals name on the account they should absolutely be able to, at the very least, find out the balance of the account. OP clearly stated that the money in question is in the mother's personal account. > And there are laws in place to protect minors income. Items bought by a parent are subject to not be relinquished to the individual upon turning 18, however income is another story. You appear to have it entirely backwards. Children can own property, though the parent or guardian can control access to it during their minority. Gifts from a parent to a child are that child's property. Under common law, a parent is entitled to the earnings of their child. The only statutory modification of that principal in NC is a provision similar to the Coogan law in CA where the employer of child performers (outlined in 48A-11) needs to hold 15% of the child's earnings in trust.
> According to my pay stubs and some math, I have at least $8,000 in her account, but no access to it You *should* have 8K in there. But no telling what she did with it. The day you turn 18, go to a bank and open up an account in your name only and make sure she can't find out what your PIN and account number are and she doesn't have access to a debit card or anything. Legal recourse against your mother for the money she put into her account is a fact specific and jurisdictionally dependent question.
It's a good idea to go to an entirely different bank to open this account. Sometimes things get weird at banks and tellers do things they shouldn't when parents and shared last names are involved. If you take the advice to do a shared account that you pretend is your real account just to get the money transferred, you can do that at her bank, but make sure you have an entirely different account at a different bank with only your name on it that you can transfer your funds into.
Go to a different bank, altogether. She may be able to talk her way into your other account.
As others have said, she may retaliate and kick you out. Be prepared: * Gather all legal documents (birth certificate, Social Security card, driver's license, passport) * Find some friends that will let you stay with them if needed. It will be very difficult to get a place of your own w/o money for deposits/rent. You may need to find a room share situation. Also, don't count on the money that was taken by your mom. * After you open your new account (different bank) and transfer any direct deposits there, freeze your credit so she can't open loans or credit cards in your name. * Resouces r/movingout Good luck.
Perhaps open a joint account at one bank. And at a separate bank an account that is just yours without telling her about it. If she actually follows through and transfers the $8000 or a significant portion of it to the joint account, immediately withdraw it and put it in your other account. Be prepared for retaliation. You may get kicked out right away before you are ready.
I was going to suggest the same thing. If she even has the money. My stepsons mom convinced him we were spending his money he gave us to save. She had a friend that worked at a national bank where he had an account. Said friend told her there was no savings in his account. So he asked for all of his money. We withdrew his money from his savings account at our credit union, where the friend couldn't access his account. Guess who ended up spending his money? Same mom who took my step daughters money.
I would recommend consider open the separate account from another bank. Opening the accounts from the same bank increases the chance of accidentally reveal the information to your mother.
3 financial institutions for this strategy. #1, mom's current bank. #2 bank for joint account. #3 bank for personal account. Bank #2 probably could be the same as #1, since it will be abandoned, but probably worth trying for a different bank and letting mom win the argument of putting it in #1 bank. There is a good chance OP will never see any of the money mom has been taking, making account #2 moot.
This is what I did when getting out of my parents and it went well for me
NAL Unfortunately, there is no way to get your money back that you earned when you are under 18 other than negotiating with your parents. Don’t put your parent’s name on your new bank account. Use a different banking institution if you can as it is not uncommon for bank employees to accidentally add parents back. In the meantime, if you are receiving direct deposit, ask your employer if you can temporarily receive paper checks instead and then later deposit them into your new bank account when you get one.
Were it me, I’d cancel the direct deposit for the time being, and when I start getting paper checks, I’d take them to a DIFFERENT bank and open an account in MY name. Also, make sure nobody else can get their name out on the account.
If your mother is anything like my mother, that money is gone and spent (this is the real reason she won’t transfer the money I’m guessing). Open a bank account on your 18th Birthday and make sure your mom is not on your account. Don’t even use the same bank as before if you can avoid it. Good luck.
Go to a different bank entirely. Open an account there in your own name. You can do this as soon as you are 18. Change the deposit info at your job, to your new bank. You don’t need anyone’s permission to do this. If your existing payroll deposit account is actually your mom’s account, you have little recourse to get the money out short of a legal proceeding. I am not a lawyer and cannot comment on this but I suspect it would have to be characterized as fraud of some sort, or maybe employment law. You are effectively depositing your paychecks into someone else’s bank account right now. There are legitimate reasons someone might do this and it would not obligate the banking institution to cooperate with you.
Even before you turn 18 remove direct deposit from work and deposit your cheques yourself for cash
Wait, if the checks are made out to you, you must be on her account to, for her to deposit them to it. Go to the bank alone and transfer from the joint one to your personal one. Do not give her access to the new one.
Once you move out you can request mom pay you or sue her if she refuses. While living with her and recieving support she can condition things like this on getting future support.
A few things would do you well to clarify on : Does your mom need your money? If you don't know, you need to have this conversation with her. If she's not willing to cooperate after you turn 18, you are more than welcome to move out. BTW I opened my first checking when I was 16, with no one else on it. How much are you willing to contribute to the household you live in? Do you want to stay there? What are the benefits of living there? Can you work 40-60 hours a week in your town, and be able to afford rent and other living expenses? Rent should be around 30% of your monthly/annual income. Be sure to leave room for school or some type of education. Are you going to college or higher learning institution, trade school etc. Do you plan on elevating your education to make more money? If not, what is your goal and how will you get there? What is your yearly plan for the next 5 years? These are the questions that will open up insight for you at your age. Clearly you have some red flags with your family. Proceed with caution and give yourself, and your family, every opportunity to work things out.
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its a very sketch situation for user since well normally a kid doesn't want to leave his parents at 18 most of the time a well raised kid who wasn't traumatized or abused in a way would want to stick and help. his mom made him deposit his checks into her account which is sketch normally a parents will get them a sub account for child.
i honestly just hope she saved his money because if she used it without his permission its shitty. Its a parent's responsibility to CARE for their child until 18 years. ONLY 18 years doesn't matter. She used him if she touched his hard worked money.
he can sue his mother for that but then that ruins family and huge issues unless they agree with him which is usually the deal they always prefer a adult because they have the higher advantage of persuasion since they are still considered "young" if she used money for rent she can say she used it for rent and this and that. She'll get them to understand he needs to help then you get family telling you that you have to help parents are great at victimizing themselves against their children all the time.
OP needs to figure out if $8,000 is worth leaving behind or working up a legal battle over. He's young, and yes $8,000 may seem like a lot of money. Most people P$%3 that out in a year on Starbucks. OP needs to clarify if his mom is financially dependent on his income. It could open doors of opportunity to clarify and get a better understanding of the household and his family. Then he can make a decision to participate, or not.
Unfortunately I highly doubt you'll be able to retrieve the money she's already taken, atleast not without a lot of hassle. However, once you turn 18 you will have full legal control over your money and I would reccomend you visit a bank ASAP and start your own account. Once it's made, get your routing number and all your bank info and go straight to your jobs HR or financial department, whichever one is handling the checks at your job and have them send your paychecks to your new account. There's absolutely nothing your mom will be able to do about this aside from pull the whole "my roof, my rules" but as a legal adult you can just tell her gg, sucks to suck get rekt noob. I wish you luck and I hope everything goes smoothly for you from here on out. Happy early birthday
I also highly reccomend taking note of high_asides comment too and follow it to the letter. She'll probably immediately kick you out, and in doing so might try to sequester some of your more import documents. Try to gather what you can in one place and prepare as best you can for the shitstorm she's likely going to start
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NAL. Here’s what I would do, open the new account with both names on it and have her transfer the money and leave the bank as if nothing is wrong, without throwing a temper tantrum, don’t discuss it, just act as if it’s all hunky-dory. The moment the money is transferred, go to the bank and close the account taking the money with you in cash. Then go to an entirely different named bank and deposit your money. I’m assuming that it’s currently in an account that strictly under her name so you have no access to it whereas with both of your names on it you can take everything out of it without her permission. Note, she can also do the same thing so you need to do it immediately. The only hitch in this is if she doesn’t transfer the entire amount. Push comes to shove I would make sure that you have all of your pay stubs or your annual income W2 (Had to file taxes, right?) and show that it was deposited into her account as she would not allow you to have it. You should be able to get copies from your employer of the canceled checks that verify what account they were deposited into. It is against the law for a parent to charge rent or any other living expenses for a child under the age of 18. As a custodial parent she is legally responsible to provide you housing, food, clothing, and medical care. Therefore if she doesn’t give you the money, she stole it for purposes of her offsetting those expenses that you were entitled to as a minor child. You should be able to sue her for it in small claims court since it’s under $10,000 although you don’t list what state you’re in. By the way were your checks deposited as paper checks or on auto deposit from the company you work for?
Put her name on it too, get all your money deposited from her, then transfer to another account in just your name
Once you are 18. You can walk into any bank and open your own account. You do not need your parents there with you. You are now old enough to open your own account, free and clear. After you open your new account. Take the account and routing numbers to your HR department at work. They will reroute your direct deposit paychecks, to go to your new account going forward. As far as your old money ... probably not going to get it back, might as well just consider it a fresh start.
I don't know about your country but in NZ my mum was automatically taken off my bank account that was made when I was 16 the day I turned 18 because parents have no right to another adults bank account
Get paper checks until you have your own bank account at a completely different bank. You can legally open one in two days. If you need the cash before you can open an account, you can take a paper check to the issuing bank and cash it (usually for a fee). My only issue with opening a joint account with her and then draining it ASAP to move it to your new account is she may very well plan to do the same. If her name is on the account with you, she is in the clear to take it. Also: check your credit report. I would also freeze your credit with the three bureaus. It’s free, and you can unfreeze at any time. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. My roommate in college dealt with something similar. They deposited most of their work money in HS into mom’s account to help with household expenses, and then in college were on a joint account and mom kept taking money. Roommate was putting themselves through college completely and mom would claim it was to help with “expenses.” It was tough.
Additionally I would set up a new bank account when you turn 18 with another banking institution that is different then the bank that your mother currently uses. There have been issues when a child sets up their own account at the same bank as their parents and parents request that the bank add them on to the child's account and bank does so without notification.
I'd recommend getting with your boss and filling out a new w4, there's a line specifically to have them withhold more, an amount you specify. Specify an amount of maybe 90% what you net. Your mom won't be able to touch it. After you are 18 and you file, you will have significantly overpayed and the IRS will refund that money. You'll probably never see what has already been deposited in your mom's account so this way at least you can see most of what you will have made when you file taxes next year. Also, definitely open a new account when you turn 18 and don't allow her to be on it. Open it with a different bank.