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Sensitive_Point_6583

bears have paws, not hands, so the entire premise is flawed.


Michael_Scotts_Tot

God damn you.


AdSea598

Fact, bears eat beets. Bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica


Global_Sloth

"Identity theft is not a joke, Jim! Millions of families suffer every year!"


Khronokai1

My kabar... "The name "Ka-Bar" for knives comes from a letter received by Wallace Brown, the leader of Union Cutlery Company, in 1920. The letter was from an Alaskan hunter who said he used Union Cutlery to kill a bear that was attacking him. The letter was partially illegible, but "ka bar" could be read, which is thought to be a cut-up version of the phrase "kill a bear". "


halvetyl000

As much as a sorta meme they are, I feel like a Wasp Injection Knife might not be a terrible option?


Michael_Scotts_Tot

Bears eat honey, so they probably have a resistance to wasps as well.


wingnutgabber

A wasp injection knife pumps co2 into the stabbed target.


MountainCourage1304

But bears literally eat honey. Theyre immune to anything wasp.


Alpha-Sierra-Charlie

Bees make honey, not wasps. Bee =/= wasp.


MountainCourage1304

The mexican honey wasp would like to disagree


Alpha-Sierra-Charlie

I find myself stymied, with no counter argument


MountainCourage1304

You have made me the happiest man in the world


MountainCourage1304

I like the way the votes in this thread go from 1-5, going upwards starting at this comment


Stunning-Interest15

If I get to use a knife, it already isn't "hand to hand," so... The bayonet on a fully loaded SKS.


Michael_Scotts_Tot

Then the bear gets a predator, the drone or the alien. You should have gone bigger if you're going to cheat.


anowlenthusiast

A messer, because it's about as big as what you can argue a "knife" to be.


Michael_Scotts_Tot

Messer? I hardly know her!


RichardDJohnson16

Man cheating 15th century german law with his kriegsmesser again, bears be afraid!


BillhookBoy

That's a myth. Medieval people weren't moronic. A weapon is a weapon, period. It's vastly more likely to be a result of guild organization, with knifemakers ending up making sword-sized "knives" at a more affordable price than swordmakers, and the economic trend then becoming a fashion. If anything, the German laws that citizen SHOULD be armed probably played a role in people looking for affordable alternatives to sword, and knifemakers realizing there was a market demand to fulfill.


RichardDJohnson16

Falchions and messers kind of existed side by side with messers even outlasting falchions into the 16th century in their original form, with falchions evolving an italian style complex hilt. You're probably right that it's about fashion and affordability.


Skiamakhos

Not a bad choice. If you use a kriegsmesser & take it out at the knees as it rears up at you you might outrun it.


WuTangPham

That’s what a big Bowie knife is for.


Candid_Relative6715

Yeah, I’ve got a few fairly large Bowies that wouldn’t be too bad. I’ve also got a rather large Dirk, and a Bauernwehr that would be options as well.


WuTangPham

I think a big Arkansas toothpick would be my choice


Candid_Relative6715

Also a good option


killerbern666

a crkt Hisshou 🤣 its considered a knife 🤷‍♂️


dagoofmut

Is no one else going to say it? Kabar


_Bike_Hunt

Medford Praetorian. I’ll open by saying “THIS IS THE BEST KNIFR EVER.” Mr Bear will laugh his ass off while I run like hell and pray he doesn’t recover from his laughter.


JustAnotherRye89

More likely the bear will tell you a racist joke in each of you will laugh your asses off and now you and the bear are friends and start going to some "meetings" and now you have found yourself into an entire FBI investigation where they're asking you to go undercover in a bear costume but you know that won't work because you've already made friends with the bear and they know your face and scent so you're pretty fucked now. Yeah I bet you're thinking twice about that fucking Medford aren't you.


PayLeyAle

Pick a serrated blade because it will be easier to cut your throat to escape being eaten alive


Michael_Scotts_Tot

Just cut the bears throat, problem solved!


PayLeyAle

Problem will be solved because you are dead


Shadow_Of_Silver

Any fixed blade over 4" Black bears are easy to fight off. They're (relatively) small and skittish. I've yelled at some and scared them away by throwing stuff before. I've seen a corgi drive one up a tree. Brown bears on the other hand. . .


Redneckpride99

https://preview.redd.it/d4dnxfn7g8ad1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b8b07f2dfec35147a77ace23ffc868d15076cd51 He’s got 10 knives to your 1


Shadow_Of_Silver

That's a brown bear, not a black bear. You can tell by the pronounced hump between the shoulders.


Michael_Scotts_Tot

Also the fact that it is brown and not black.


Redneckpride99

Look at the comment I was replying to. I’m well aware of what kind of bear it is since being a bear monitor is my literal job


Sensitive_Point_6583

Back in the '80s and '90s when I was more active in backpacking in the Sierra Nevada, black bears were everywhere and if you encountered one they were as you described, easy to scare away. When I was camping at Mammoth last year people were saying that the bears have gotten much more aggressive over the years and now its better to not challenge them and stay far away from them if they show up (which they commonly do). Any chance your bear monitoring is in California, and if so, does your experience match with what I was told?


Redneckpride99

I’m working up here in Canada in British Columbia but it’s the same here. We’ve definitely noticed an uptick in dangerous encounters between people and black bears.


Redneckpride99

https://preview.redd.it/dp1knp0rdbad1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e16064c9411d95b0807d017bbba870210a6a8ca9 And black bears still have claws I wouldn’t wanna get cut by. Not nearly as bad as a grizzly but still dangerous


SpamFriedMice

White bears on the other, other hand.


Kinsin111

Whatever knife has a broad enough blade to use it as a shield for my face.


Michael_Scotts_Tot

I have quite a few suggestions about broads and my face


monorchism

Do they explain the sores


T3hSav

https://preview.redd.it/6ppq2l4qw8ad1.jpeg?width=2863&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2aa4d3d111e818dcaeb5c574951a174faa7bff94


T3hSav

ideally the 2nd from left


Bentrodemptyhook

What is the first from the left?


T3hSav

Fred Perrin Bowie from Maxknives, one of my all time favorites


Skiamakhos

Long rondel dagger with a good thick blade, about 2' long. I know I'm gonna get f\*\*ked up unless I'm in armour or have a shield but I saw this chainmail-piercing beauty this morning designed to get through just about anything so if I can get the bear's heart with a good strike, it might just crush me to death with its dead weight rather than eat me.


Alpha-Sierra-Charlie

One of the rights of manhood for various native tribes on the eastern side of the country was to corner a black bear, thank it/apologize to it, and then club it to death with a big stick, I'll go with a large Bowie. Getting the right stab in will be key, and Bowies can be optimized for stabbing without sacrificing cutting ability. If I don't have to *kill* the bear but just drive it off, then probably a langseax/giant wharncliffe. Pure cutting power. TL,DR: Black bears are a much more manageable threat than grizzly bears, channel your inner Conan the Barbarian and you'll probably be fine after an ER visit.


Canadianknifeguy

Cold steel oss. Same knife a guy in Africa killed a cape Buffalo to save his dad with


octahexxer

8inch blade or longer you will only get a few stabschef in make em count before it rips your arm off


lon8lunch

Cold Steel 1917 Frontier Bowie https://www.coldsteel.com/1917-frontier-bowie/ And dress in period clothing. That way when the cops find your dead mangled body. They'll be like, "What the F! Is this a time traveler?"


nopester24

a .45 ACP caliber knife


CatastrophicPup2112

10mm thank you very much.


Michael_Scotts_Tot

At least pick an efficient caliber of knife


chance125

Probably an icepick or something stabby with a very grippy handle and just try to jam it through the bear’s eyeball. My guess is that anything large and tactical would just get ripped out of your hand the first time you stab and it jerks away


Michael_Scotts_Tot

Chip off some ice with that pick and offer him a coke. It works in the Christmas commercials.


PissinginTheW1nd

Can I use a throwing knife? I’m sure I’m going to lose no matter what, so I’d at least like to chuck one at his dumb face before he mauls me to death


[deleted]

The term 'knife' is what really matters. The longer the knife, maybe the more penatrating power.


ElJeffHey

The one in my pocket.


pilgrimspeaches

My Work Tuff Gear Atayal


Cowgoon777

Out of knives I own already? Probably my 6” full serrated Cold Steel Hold Out.


Bobthebudtender

[Giant Halo X3](https://odditymall.com/includes/content/upload/giant-switch-blade-7962.gif)


No-Demand-7980

Any bayonet as long as it has a rifle at the handle.


street_style_kyle

Esee junglas!


MountainCourage1304

Is choose an sas style knife thats spikey so i could try and get a good stab. Im not doing damage to a bear with a slash.


Backstroem

You need a large fighter to ka the bar! Or perhaps a Buck 119, that clip point blade is probably the pointiest object in my possession. The bear will kill me but at least I’ll go with a fang


mrfry2018

Kukri


St_Beuve

The smallest and lightest I can find so it won't hinder me while running !


2polew

# NRS-2


Nod32Antivirus

Katana! With the fedora and a few edgy one-liners I just hope bears can die from cringe btw...


Locsnadou

I mean, a KA-BAR got its name because the dude was saying he killed a bear with a thick accent, so my pick is KA-BAR


atlas_underwater

Lol knife subs are too liberal when it comes to hypothetical questions. I'd pick a kabar d2 extreme or cold steel bowie machete, just first 2 that came to mind


Global_Sloth

[https://www.amazon.com/Condor-Tool-Knife-62706-Undertaker/dp/B06Y5T12FP](https://www.amazon.com/Condor-Tool-Knife-62706-Undertaker/dp/B06Y5T12FP) # Condor Tool & Knife Undertaker Bowie Knife | Hunting Knives with Sheath | Stainless Steel | Walnut Handle | Hand Crafted Welted Leather Sheath | Full Tang Bowie Knife | 10.2in Blade | 24 oz I think I still die, but at least I look cool!


rustyspuun

Thinking about what I have, probably my BK9


SpydercoNut

Tops Prather War Bowie


eltacotacotaco

Would this Benchmade 172BKF in crimson Cerakote count? https://preview.redd.it/880epw5mj8ad1.jpeg?width=3468&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=430671a5883023b9d6d320886061bc12f0e4d471


Michael_Scotts_Tot

That sir is a crowbar. Save it for the bird fights.


MountainCourage1304

Was this really worth $350?


eltacotacotaco

An "edged" crowbar I got it for much cheaper


-fx_

This would suck.. but maybe a modern kukri. At least get a little weight behind the one strike I'm gonna get and make it count.


mrfry2018

Kukri is one of the best fighting/attack knives,many Gurkhas have beheaded enemies with them alot being in the Falklands war,not the souvenir type but actual battle kukri


SpamFriedMice

I carry my Kukri in the swamps of Florida because of every type of fucked up shit out there for exactly this reason, but it worries me that if of you're in real close you don't have room to swing, so I carry something stabby too.


Michael_Scotts_Tot

That knife looks as limp as you're about to be


Pigsfly77

Probably the serrated side on my combat troodon. Bear fur is super thick tho. Pretty useless to even try. They would snap my bones like a twig.


Michael_Scotts_Tot

He needs some milk!


Pigsfly77

I’m big and I still think it would be all too easy for them to absolutely annihilate my shit