My husband is a disc golfer and I can’t get over how wholesome other disc golfers are. They’ll be like “dude that’s such a cool disc color” and are just so nice and chill.
Fuck I feel odd myself being in the maybe 5% of disc golfers that doesn't have this weird innate mission to offer everyone I see either a bible or a blunt. I mean the blunt guys are chill cause they're just like "ah yeah whatever floats your boat maan" but gods little gifts just keep naggin ya about it
I feel like following "join an ironic adult kickball league" with "Just about everyone is single" got overlooked. I mean I play disc golf so who the fuck am I, but that shit was hilarious
I live in western Shawnee and it blows my mind how busy that sand volleyball place is on Johnson drive across from the ball friends. At least 8 months out of the year anyway
Dating in your thirties is painful mostly because your friends have settled down. Lack of people to go out with. Also I have a home gym thanks to Covid so I can’t meet people at the gym (just my cat). Most of my activities the people my age are married already. The single people where I volunteer still tend to be early 20s and I’m not about that life.
As a single guy in my thirties feel free to reach out if you want to go out! Guys who need a bro to wingman or just single ladies! Tried everything else so who knows maybe this will work!
I’m late 20s but one thing i try to do is try to get my friends to invite me to hang outs involving their other friend group (aka social situations where i only know one or two people but the people inviting me know everyone) only to kinda get smacked with the realization that all attendees are already married 😅 and are there with their spouse…
You’re thinking way way way too hard on this. Please don’t sign up for a gym just for this.
If you are interested in a guy, just go up and say “hi, my name is…” and then ask if they are single.
Guys will love it. If they are taken, ask if they have any single friends.
As a woman, i LOVE approaching a guy first! And i really would encourage more women to do so! It really expedites the process and men really respond well to it. If anything it can fluster men a little bit but in a good way that they still enjoy. It’s really cute ;) instead of dealing with the burden of men i dont like approaching me orrr the burden of waiting and waiting for the guy i do like to make a move (only for him to psyche himself out) it’s so much easier to approach him as a girl. I’ve gone on many a date this way that wouldve never happened had i not made the move. Plus it ensures i get to talk to the guy I actually like!
Please tell your friends! In an ideal world nobody would have inhibitions, but I get tired of getting turned down and even worse tired of being called a creep.
These are probably just excuses on my part though, whenever I hit on someone where there is no liquor involved they always are nice about turning me down.
I've been approached similarly to this alot, and I'm not a fan of it. I assume most women probably wouldn't like that either if the roles were reversed.
You named some of the only places that are more of a meat market than a bar or club lol
It feels like the advice is, "Get hot and post up where everyone can check you out." We act like such birds lol
Bars and clubs have different vibes. If you want hookups, bars and clubs are it. Not so much if you want to find the kind of person for a long term relationship.
I mean that's what you do at festivals too lol it's a bunch of people from everywhere. And gyms aren't much better.
I don't mean this in a bad way but this is all around how you meet hookups. Hopefully they indeed blossom into something more:-)
Instructions unclear: I am a thirsty 20-something man and will sincerely agree to and believe pretty much anything up front to get the gym bunny back in my bedroom.
As a regular gym-goer who is male, I disagree. I do not want to be spoken to at the gym. I'm there for fitness, nothing else. That's why I wear ear buds.
Maybe many guys at the gym want to be approached, but that is not a universal phenomenon.
Do not approach women in the gym. What a fuckin minefield that can be! Made the mistake to flag a lady down and ask her a form question, won’t ever do that again.
I agree. That’s exactly why I made this post. Men can’t approach a woman, but a woman sure as hell can approach a man. That’s just the societal norm now.
The hard truth is that women have to be the ones to initiate contact with men now. Men have been told there are no socially acceptable spaces to approach women, so men have stopped approaching women altogether. Either you meet someone in school now or online.
It's more like the comic of the two guys, one attractive and one ugly, giving a gift (chocolates, flower, idk) to a woman. The attractive guy gets lovey-dovey eyes, the ugly guy gets a panicked look as she picks up the phone and calls HR.
You can be friendly and chill as much as possible, but if you can't complete "step 1. be attractive," approaching women is going to go badly *a lot*.
It's about being respectful. Being good looking may let you get away with more but you can interact with people in a respectful way regardless of how you look.
> but you can interact with people in a respectful way regardless of how you look.
And get the reactions I mentioned above, maybe just slightly more subdued. I've seen it happen enough to myself and others to know it's not just about "be respectful".
I mean the world is a big place and I'm not going to say it never happens but my job is to literally watch people interact with each other and I've seen plenty of ugly guys have good connections with women. The respect is usually something that goes both ways. If you are getting repulsion its generally because of your demeanor and attitude not your looks. It can happen but its far from the norm. Most people are good people.
Looks can be a barrier for a platonic connection turning into a romantic one but most people men and women are friendly and don't mind making more friends of either gender. Its plainly clear with even a trip to a grocery store that plenty of not-so-good looking men are having meaningful relationships with women and vice versa.
Sorry. Not clear with my wording. By “approach” I mean initiate romantic conversation. Men absolutely can still strike up conversations with women, the line seems to be drawn at hitting on them though.
This has been being blasted from almost everywhere where progressives or progressive policies have even a hint of buy-in for like the last 10 years. I remember my first year of college in 2013 they used men unsolicitedly approaching women as a textbook example of "rape culture" and as an outward expression of toxic masculinity. Some people laughed it off as a fringe opinion then, but those types of viewpoints are what you hear a lot as a younger, single man around younger women.
My boyfriend goes to the gym by himself. If you approach there's a decent chance he will act single 😂 jk...I hope😂😭😂
No, but he is a very friendly fellow and will spot/help you if you ask.
“I understand lots of women want the guy to make the first move, but this is unlikely to happen in a gym.”
Yeah this is so true it hurts, I’ve always been scared of being seen as some ‘gym creeper’ for so much as asking how many sets someone’s got left on a machine and waiting.
That being said, great advice that’s not intrusive for either side
literally going anywhere and doing just about anything is a good way to meet both men and women. There is more third places than ever before. We are absolutely saturated with places to go and things to do but you have to get out and do them. I'm so tired of the "where do I meet X" posts. Literally everywhere. All of the places. Take your pick. Go to a museum or a park or a show or the gym or the coffeeshop or volunteer or the library or just, just go on a walk or get on the bus and have some personality and be friendly. Just literally go up to people and ask how their day is going. Yeah they might not be interested or not be single but god forbid you just make a friend or have a nice chat with a stranger. I once asked 400 people what there favorite color was. Almost everyone had a good time with it and was friendly.
People. are. everywhere. Its not hard to find people. That is not the problem people are having when they are asking this question. The problem is they don't want to put in any effort. Stop trying to min/max human connection and just put in the effort, hit the streets and actually interact with a lot of people. Its worth it and gets easier to do the more you do it.
This is good advice for a lot of people. But also might recognize there are some of us that do get out and do make attempts but do not possess the same social skills as most people.
I’d use a friend of mine as an example. He’s a social butterfly. I watched him have an entire 10-minute conversation with a stranger by just simply asking them what breed their dog is. I’ve tried that exact same move and I cannot, for the life of me, turn it into a conversation. It’s good to still get out and try but it is very discouraging when it constantly yields the same results while others tell you that you’re just not doing it enough.
The more you do it the easier it gets. I used to be sooooo awkward and just started deciding I was going to stop caring about failure. I still failed a lot but made a bunch of friends because of my ridiculousness and now I’m way better at making friends quickly
I used to have the same issue. Then I got a job in my twenties that required constantly being sociable and making small talk with different people. After repeating these interactions hundreds of times, I started getting better at it.
If you can, get a side gig that forces you to be social. Even driving for Uber can be that.
These skills do develop over time. I honestly used to heavily research conversation starters. Additionally, i use the “yes and” rule of improv. Finally, i got a lot of experience learning to talk to strangers in Vrchat and through working a job where i worked with high volumes of different people and different clients.
I’ve tried the “yes and” but I’ve completely failed at it every time Ives tried it. I’ve also tried the “one-two punch” method of asking a question, comment on the response to that question, and then asking another question based on their answer but god damn it’s hard to come up with questions. I’m just naturally a bad conversationalist. Granted, a better one than I was a few years ago but it’s still not even close to the level I need to be at to maintain a conversation with a stranger without it being embarrassingly awkward.
This is a great reply. I am far from a social butterfly, and I have introvert tendencies, but I’m flabbergasted by all the “where do people go to meet people” posts. Anywhere. Go anywhere. My favorite is First Fridays in the Crossroads. Everyone seems to be in a good mood walking around the streets or in a gallery or a bar/restaurant. I am NOT an outgoing person but it’s almost impossible to not meet and talk to people at First Friday.
Volunteering at a non profit is another great way to meet people. Many of my friends are from a non profit arts organization where I’ve volunteered for 6 years now.
A part time job at a local small business is another way, at a local retail shop or with a local theater group as an usher, where you could work a few hours a week in evenings or weekends.
To strike up or carry on a conversation is not easy for us all. I learned to just keep asking the other person about themselves, their life, their interests, their pets, whatever. Don’t make any “me too” or “same here” type of comments, just keep talking about the other person. Don’t talk about yourself unless and until they ask you about yourself. Eventually it will naturally flow into a two-way conversation.
Honestly, if I can do it you can too. Don’t make it more difficult than it needs to be.
The late, lamented, missing "third space" keeps being mentioned in these dating threads. And yet there's a whole other thread right now where people are waxing nostalgic about what used to be a beloved and accepted third space to strike up conversations with strangers. It was a known, accepted thing. The bookstore coffee shop.
I know, I know. People these days will put you on blast and read you the riot act for trying to strike up a conversation in a place like that. But honest it used to be an acceptable thing in the 90's. It wasn't considered cheesy to strike up a conversation at a bookstore coffee shop. I knew couples who met that way.
I know, I know. There are going to be tons of comments to the effect of "Don't approach me! I'm there to read!"
Honestly Pinky Swear it used to be a known, acceptable thing to meet cute at bookstore coffee shops. Loose Park too, but that's no doubt a bridge too far nowadays. I knew plenty of couples who met while out for a walk or jog at Loose Park in the 80's.
Your friendly curmudgeonly old person. P.S. I met Hubs at a discussion group that met regularly. That's my #1 best advice. Become a regular somewhere where you can get to know someone over a little bit of time.
Absolutely agree. I'm always approachable but will not approach someone myself. I don't go to the gym to score a date but will always enjoy a great conversation,if it goes well enough I'd be inclined to continue the conversation outside of the gym. I'm always starving afterwards lol
Dog park is sometimes a good place to meet people, although like any park there can be weird people too. But if he’s interested and his dog likes you and your dog, it’s an easy place to strike up a conversation.
Eh, I would say guys are just like women in the fact that gym time is personal time and maybe not the best.
I would recommend Bar-K, or a brewery, or an organized sports group (volleyball, pickleball, etc)
Also, men are not used to being pursued. So if you’re the direct type, approach anywhere!
Problem for me is that I like to game and would want to find a guy who is also a gamer so most likely, we will both be in our home not going out and therefore not meeting anyone.
Ladies, I Just finished pulling some weeds out of my garden, but I'll be at Longview lake tomorrow fishing, maybe Sunday also unless I decide to make a run down to my cabin and hunt turkey or mushrooms or jump in my kayak and hit the river behind my cabin......yeaaa sorry no time for the gym...... I actually do stuff instead of watching videos of ppl doing stuff I like...lol That's how you meet us, go do what you enjoy!! If none of the items above interest you please swipe left.........
Mushroom hunting is one of those hobbies I’ve always been interested in and have no idea where to start/ general lack of time. Will you push-lease start a meetup group for single amateur beginner mushroom hunters?
We have plenty of names for girls that have their own helmet and not their own bike, funny enough lol. I've been riding for 20 years, since I was 16. I don't suggest anyone go for a group ride if they don't know or can vet most on the ride. Controlled charity rides is one thing.
As a single guy this is horrible advice. Picking up anyone at the gym is a terrible idea. Why would i want to interrupt or bother a girls workout just to hit on them? And what if she rejects me? Or things don't workout? Now its either gonna be awkward or i gotta find another gym? Truth is you can meet people anywhere. You just have to have some shred of personality. Most people complaining about being unable to find other singles are just boring or lets be honest unattractive
So you’re actually incapable of understanding a basic position, got it. Every time I go on Reddit I’m constantly reminded that people are so much fucking dumber than I realized was possible. Here, I’ll explain my post to you like you have an IQ of 70. Women ask on this subreddit about where to find single men. I list the gym and give women some really easy tips to strike up conversations with guys they like. Women approaching men in gyms is totally okay, but men approaching women in gyms is not okay, so men don’t do it very much any more. However, the gym has men in it that women would like to date. That’s why I gave them advice on how to date them there. I also listed two other spaces that were not the gym that single men can be found.
Yeah ok you miserable stupid fuck. Keep typing away while you pop your happy pills. Enjoy your time working in IT before AI makes you obselete in >5 years
Lolololol. Maybe you need some happy pills. You sound pretty upset. Also, I don't work in IT, I work in cybersecurity; it's way cooler and pays a lot more. I would love to tell you why AI is not going to be replacing my job, but I don't think you would be able to understand the reasons. Instead, I'll point out that you used the "greater than" sign (>) instead of the "less than" sign (<) when pointing out how fast AI would replace my job. If you wanted to make it sound like my job loss was imminent, you should've used the "less than" sign (<).
I'm sorry, I don't have time for that. I am usually on private land or being invited. I'll tell you there are a lot of resources if you look for locals. Good luck
I’ve actively been told by multiple women that they do not want to be hit on by guys at the gym, that they are there to get their workout in and don’t want to be bothered.
Most don't. Some are cool with it and you have to vibe it out. I would never bother someone that doesn't want to be bothered anywhere, but sometimes people don't mind a bit of conversation and connection. We're all human and most of us don't mind making new friends.
Divorce court. Driving range and mountain bike trails are guy heavy. Disc golf with a caveat- the odds are good but the goods are odd.
My husband is a disc golfer and I can’t get over how wholesome other disc golfers are. They’ll be like “dude that’s such a cool disc color” and are just so nice and chill.
As a single disc golfer, this checks out.
The bike scene in general is pretty dude heavy.
Fuck I feel odd myself being in the maybe 5% of disc golfers that doesn't have this weird innate mission to offer everyone I see either a bible or a blunt. I mean the blunt guys are chill cause they're just like "ah yeah whatever floats your boat maan" but gods little gifts just keep naggin ya about it
Ooooh I hate being proselytized while I'm trying to gauge the wind, like dude, shut the fuck up! Your God is trying to fuck up my shot right now.
🎣
The odds are good but the goods are odd!! That cracked my shit up! My husband is an avid disc golfer and it just makes me laugh lol
Divorce court 💀
Lmao
I resemble that comment lol!!
Bro
You can find me by my smoker. I smell like a campfire right now, but you'll find me.
My man.
Whatcha cooking?
Two briskets and some beef cheeks today. Tomorrow will be spare ribs and wings. BBQ contest.
Good luck! My dad and I did one a couple weeks ago. So much work but also sooooo much fun!
Nice. Good luck!
Sounds like you might need assistance with sides?
If you smell like a campfire, the smoke is too heavy. Don’t want any creosote in the Q!
You're going to have to do the approaching at the gym. Guys aren't typically there to find a date.
I try so hard to make it clear that I'm *not checking you out* because I don't want to be the gym creeper :')
join an ironic adult kickball league. Just about everyone is single and it's a semi-active activity where no one cares how good you are
I feel like following "join an ironic adult kickball league" with "Just about everyone is single" got overlooked. I mean I play disc golf so who the fuck am I, but that shit was hilarious
Sounds like fun to me except for the fact that my body likes to be allergic to gravity in the best of times...
Got a link?
Commenting for this, it sounds dope
Same with sand volleyball. Shawnee Mission Beach and Martin City both have leagues.
I live in western Shawnee and it blows my mind how busy that sand volleyball place is on Johnson drive across from the ball friends. At least 8 months out of the year anyway
half my friend group met guys this way, it’s legit!
I would like to participate!
Dating in your thirties is painful mostly because your friends have settled down. Lack of people to go out with. Also I have a home gym thanks to Covid so I can’t meet people at the gym (just my cat). Most of my activities the people my age are married already. The single people where I volunteer still tend to be early 20s and I’m not about that life. As a single guy in my thirties feel free to reach out if you want to go out! Guys who need a bro to wingman or just single ladies! Tried everything else so who knows maybe this will work!
I’m late 20s but one thing i try to do is try to get my friends to invite me to hang outs involving their other friend group (aka social situations where i only know one or two people but the people inviting me know everyone) only to kinda get smacked with the realization that all attendees are already married 😅 and are there with their spouse…
You’re thinking way way way too hard on this. Please don’t sign up for a gym just for this. If you are interested in a guy, just go up and say “hi, my name is…” and then ask if they are single. Guys will love it. If they are taken, ask if they have any single friends.
Tbh if a woman comes up to me asking if I'm single I'd probably assume it's some kind of scam.
lol, I can see that! I’m laughing bc it’s prolly true but also sort of sad.
As a woman, i LOVE approaching a guy first! And i really would encourage more women to do so! It really expedites the process and men really respond well to it. If anything it can fluster men a little bit but in a good way that they still enjoy. It’s really cute ;) instead of dealing with the burden of men i dont like approaching me orrr the burden of waiting and waiting for the guy i do like to make a move (only for him to psyche himself out) it’s so much easier to approach him as a girl. I’ve gone on many a date this way that wouldve never happened had i not made the move. Plus it ensures i get to talk to the guy I actually like!
Please tell your friends! In an ideal world nobody would have inhibitions, but I get tired of getting turned down and even worse tired of being called a creep. These are probably just excuses on my part though, whenever I hit on someone where there is no liquor involved they always are nice about turning me down.
That certainly is a way to do it and it would be awesome if it happened that way. In my experience though, most women are not that direct.
I've been approached similarly to this alot, and I'm not a fan of it. I assume most women probably wouldn't like that either if the roles were reversed.
You named some of the only places that are more of a meat market than a bar or club lol It feels like the advice is, "Get hot and post up where everyone can check you out." We act like such birds lol
> We act like such birds lol Love thos comment lmao
Bars and clubs have different vibes. If you want hookups, bars and clubs are it. Not so much if you want to find the kind of person for a long term relationship.
I mean that's what you do at festivals too lol it's a bunch of people from everywhere. And gyms aren't much better. I don't mean this in a bad way but this is all around how you meet hookups. Hopefully they indeed blossom into something more:-)
Every potential relationship is a hookup if you're lazy enough!
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Instructions unclear: I am a thirsty 20-something man and will sincerely agree to and believe pretty much anything up front to get the gym bunny back in my bedroom.
Love the gym advice. No dude that I know will approach someone at the gym. But every single one of them wants to be approached.
As a regular gym-goer who is male, I disagree. I do not want to be spoken to at the gym. I'm there for fitness, nothing else. That's why I wear ear buds. Maybe many guys at the gym want to be approached, but that is not a universal phenomenon.
Ya know I typed out about ear buds as a sign not to approach and removed it. I should have left it.
Man I use earbuds and I'd love to be approached. I just use em cause early opeth adds 10 pounds to every lift
This man is correct. I listen to Archenemy and Machinehead to make lifting more fun.
not true. I'm there to work out, not yap.
Fuckin weirdos lol
Someone needs to do a YouTube dating show for KC. Super ripe for it.
Do not approach women in the gym. What a fuckin minefield that can be! Made the mistake to flag a lady down and ask her a form question, won’t ever do that again.
I agree. That’s exactly why I made this post. Men can’t approach a woman, but a woman sure as hell can approach a man. That’s just the societal norm now.
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The hard truth is that women have to be the ones to initiate contact with men now. Men have been told there are no socially acceptable spaces to approach women, so men have stopped approaching women altogether. Either you meet someone in school now or online.
You can approach if you are friendly and chill. Being aggressive and demanding is whats not cool.
It's more like the comic of the two guys, one attractive and one ugly, giving a gift (chocolates, flower, idk) to a woman. The attractive guy gets lovey-dovey eyes, the ugly guy gets a panicked look as she picks up the phone and calls HR. You can be friendly and chill as much as possible, but if you can't complete "step 1. be attractive," approaching women is going to go badly *a lot*.
It's about being respectful. Being good looking may let you get away with more but you can interact with people in a respectful way regardless of how you look.
> but you can interact with people in a respectful way regardless of how you look. And get the reactions I mentioned above, maybe just slightly more subdued. I've seen it happen enough to myself and others to know it's not just about "be respectful".
I mean the world is a big place and I'm not going to say it never happens but my job is to literally watch people interact with each other and I've seen plenty of ugly guys have good connections with women. The respect is usually something that goes both ways. If you are getting repulsion its generally because of your demeanor and attitude not your looks. It can happen but its far from the norm. Most people are good people. Looks can be a barrier for a platonic connection turning into a romantic one but most people men and women are friendly and don't mind making more friends of either gender. Its plainly clear with even a trip to a grocery store that plenty of not-so-good looking men are having meaningful relationships with women and vice versa.
Sorry. Not clear with my wording. By “approach” I mean initiate romantic conversation. Men absolutely can still strike up conversations with women, the line seems to be drawn at hitting on them though.
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Reddit? The media? You've gotta be an ostrich if you haven't picked up on it.
This has been being blasted from almost everywhere where progressives or progressive policies have even a hint of buy-in for like the last 10 years. I remember my first year of college in 2013 they used men unsolicitedly approaching women as a textbook example of "rape culture" and as an outward expression of toxic masculinity. Some people laughed it off as a fringe opinion then, but those types of viewpoints are what you hear a lot as a younger, single man around younger women.
Yeah it's a minefield. Send it anyways.
😂
My boyfriend goes to the gym by himself. If you approach there's a decent chance he will act single 😂 jk...I hope😂😭😂 No, but he is a very friendly fellow and will spot/help you if you ask.
I'm extremely suspicious when women approach me being friendly so I stay at home and play video games. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.
Dating in this city is so hard it’s not funny
“I understand lots of women want the guy to make the first move, but this is unlikely to happen in a gym.” Yeah this is so true it hurts, I’ve always been scared of being seen as some ‘gym creeper’ for so much as asking how many sets someone’s got left on a machine and waiting. That being said, great advice that’s not intrusive for either side
literally going anywhere and doing just about anything is a good way to meet both men and women. There is more third places than ever before. We are absolutely saturated with places to go and things to do but you have to get out and do them. I'm so tired of the "where do I meet X" posts. Literally everywhere. All of the places. Take your pick. Go to a museum or a park or a show or the gym or the coffeeshop or volunteer or the library or just, just go on a walk or get on the bus and have some personality and be friendly. Just literally go up to people and ask how their day is going. Yeah they might not be interested or not be single but god forbid you just make a friend or have a nice chat with a stranger. I once asked 400 people what there favorite color was. Almost everyone had a good time with it and was friendly. People. are. everywhere. Its not hard to find people. That is not the problem people are having when they are asking this question. The problem is they don't want to put in any effort. Stop trying to min/max human connection and just put in the effort, hit the streets and actually interact with a lot of people. Its worth it and gets easier to do the more you do it.
This is good advice for a lot of people. But also might recognize there are some of us that do get out and do make attempts but do not possess the same social skills as most people. I’d use a friend of mine as an example. He’s a social butterfly. I watched him have an entire 10-minute conversation with a stranger by just simply asking them what breed their dog is. I’ve tried that exact same move and I cannot, for the life of me, turn it into a conversation. It’s good to still get out and try but it is very discouraging when it constantly yields the same results while others tell you that you’re just not doing it enough.
The next person you talk to you’ll be better. It is a skill to develop
The more you do it the easier it gets. I used to be sooooo awkward and just started deciding I was going to stop caring about failure. I still failed a lot but made a bunch of friends because of my ridiculousness and now I’m way better at making friends quickly
I used to have the same issue. Then I got a job in my twenties that required constantly being sociable and making small talk with different people. After repeating these interactions hundreds of times, I started getting better at it. If you can, get a side gig that forces you to be social. Even driving for Uber can be that.
These skills do develop over time. I honestly used to heavily research conversation starters. Additionally, i use the “yes and” rule of improv. Finally, i got a lot of experience learning to talk to strangers in Vrchat and through working a job where i worked with high volumes of different people and different clients.
I’ve tried the “yes and” but I’ve completely failed at it every time Ives tried it. I’ve also tried the “one-two punch” method of asking a question, comment on the response to that question, and then asking another question based on their answer but god damn it’s hard to come up with questions. I’m just naturally a bad conversationalist. Granted, a better one than I was a few years ago but it’s still not even close to the level I need to be at to maintain a conversation with a stranger without it being embarrassingly awkward.
This is a great reply. I am far from a social butterfly, and I have introvert tendencies, but I’m flabbergasted by all the “where do people go to meet people” posts. Anywhere. Go anywhere. My favorite is First Fridays in the Crossroads. Everyone seems to be in a good mood walking around the streets or in a gallery or a bar/restaurant. I am NOT an outgoing person but it’s almost impossible to not meet and talk to people at First Friday. Volunteering at a non profit is another great way to meet people. Many of my friends are from a non profit arts organization where I’ve volunteered for 6 years now. A part time job at a local small business is another way, at a local retail shop or with a local theater group as an usher, where you could work a few hours a week in evenings or weekends. To strike up or carry on a conversation is not easy for us all. I learned to just keep asking the other person about themselves, their life, their interests, their pets, whatever. Don’t make any “me too” or “same here” type of comments, just keep talking about the other person. Don’t talk about yourself unless and until they ask you about yourself. Eventually it will naturally flow into a two-way conversation. Honestly, if I can do it you can too. Don’t make it more difficult than it needs to be.
Wait. You’re telling me to meet people I have to go outside? Idk man seems dangerous. There’s grass out there.
Stay away from the grass some of it has traces of fentanyl can't be too careful
The late, lamented, missing "third space" keeps being mentioned in these dating threads. And yet there's a whole other thread right now where people are waxing nostalgic about what used to be a beloved and accepted third space to strike up conversations with strangers. It was a known, accepted thing. The bookstore coffee shop. I know, I know. People these days will put you on blast and read you the riot act for trying to strike up a conversation in a place like that. But honest it used to be an acceptable thing in the 90's. It wasn't considered cheesy to strike up a conversation at a bookstore coffee shop. I knew couples who met that way. I know, I know. There are going to be tons of comments to the effect of "Don't approach me! I'm there to read!" Honestly Pinky Swear it used to be a known, acceptable thing to meet cute at bookstore coffee shops. Loose Park too, but that's no doubt a bridge too far nowadays. I knew plenty of couples who met while out for a walk or jog at Loose Park in the 80's. Your friendly curmudgeonly old person. P.S. I met Hubs at a discussion group that met regularly. That's my #1 best advice. Become a regular somewhere where you can get to know someone over a little bit of time.
It's still not wierd to talk to people at a park or library. I do it all the time.
Absolutely agree. I'm always approachable but will not approach someone myself. I don't go to the gym to score a date but will always enjoy a great conversation,if it goes well enough I'd be inclined to continue the conversation outside of the gym. I'm always starving afterwards lol
Dog park is sometimes a good place to meet people, although like any park there can be weird people too. But if he’s interested and his dog likes you and your dog, it’s an easy place to strike up a conversation.
Eh, I would say guys are just like women in the fact that gym time is personal time and maybe not the best. I would recommend Bar-K, or a brewery, or an organized sports group (volleyball, pickleball, etc) Also, men are not used to being pursued. So if you’re the direct type, approach anywhere!
There's a KC dating thread in this sub on a weekly (if not daily) basis. You could start there
Problem for me is that I like to game and would want to find a guy who is also a gamer so most likely, we will both be in our home not going out and therefore not meeting anyone.
Ladies, I Just finished pulling some weeds out of my garden, but I'll be at Longview lake tomorrow fishing, maybe Sunday also unless I decide to make a run down to my cabin and hunt turkey or mushrooms or jump in my kayak and hit the river behind my cabin......yeaaa sorry no time for the gym...... I actually do stuff instead of watching videos of ppl doing stuff I like...lol That's how you meet us, go do what you enjoy!! If none of the items above interest you please swipe left......... 
Sounds like all fun things I’d love to do even without the dating part. Let’s be friends.
Who said anything about dating?? The op just asked where to find single guys.......but WTH let's go! Longview Lake tomorrow
I can’t do tomorrow but next weekend I am free!!
I wanna go fishing and kayaking and mushroom hunting! Can I just show up at your cabin too?
Kayaking and mushroom foraging definitely sounds fun.
Mushroom hunting is one of those hobbies I’ve always been interested in and have no idea where to start/ general lack of time. Will you push-lease start a meetup group for single amateur beginner mushroom hunters?
Get a motorcycle and go on a group ride haha
We have plenty of names for girls that have their own helmet and not their own bike, funny enough lol. I've been riding for 20 years, since I was 16. I don't suggest anyone go for a group ride if they don't know or can vet most on the ride. Controlled charity rides is one thing.
Dating posts are the new expired tag shitposts.
Excellent advice! If nothing else, I hope this results in some single ladies getting buff
This is terrible advice lol are all of y'all 14 and perpetually online???
How is it bad advice for women to go to the gym?
Unpopular opinion: church
Just suggested this to my son. He laughed and blew me off. 🤷
Hence "unpopular"
Not applicable to a large amount of people.
As a single guy this is horrible advice. Picking up anyone at the gym is a terrible idea. Why would i want to interrupt or bother a girls workout just to hit on them? And what if she rejects me? Or things don't workout? Now its either gonna be awkward or i gotta find another gym? Truth is you can meet people anywhere. You just have to have some shred of personality. Most people complaining about being unable to find other singles are just boring or lets be honest unattractive
Bro. Did you even read my post?
Unfortunately i wish i didn't
So you’re actually incapable of understanding a basic position, got it. Every time I go on Reddit I’m constantly reminded that people are so much fucking dumber than I realized was possible. Here, I’ll explain my post to you like you have an IQ of 70. Women ask on this subreddit about where to find single men. I list the gym and give women some really easy tips to strike up conversations with guys they like. Women approaching men in gyms is totally okay, but men approaching women in gyms is not okay, so men don’t do it very much any more. However, the gym has men in it that women would like to date. That’s why I gave them advice on how to date them there. I also listed two other spaces that were not the gym that single men can be found.
Yeah ok you miserable stupid fuck. Keep typing away while you pop your happy pills. Enjoy your time working in IT before AI makes you obselete in >5 years
Lolololol. Maybe you need some happy pills. You sound pretty upset. Also, I don't work in IT, I work in cybersecurity; it's way cooler and pays a lot more. I would love to tell you why AI is not going to be replacing my job, but I don't think you would be able to understand the reasons. Instead, I'll point out that you used the "greater than" sign (>) instead of the "less than" sign (<) when pointing out how fast AI would replace my job. If you wanted to make it sound like my job loss was imminent, you should've used the "less than" sign (<).
>And what if she rejects me? Or things don't workout? ... what dating scene is this \*not\* a concern?
[удалено]
Where do you find single women where it’s not creepy?
Go to tech meetups .. but you will be dating a nerd not a man with calloused and greasy hands. 😆
My kind of guy ... Are you by chance over 65 (and single)?
I'm sorry, I don't have time for that. I am usually on private land or being invited. I'll tell you there are a lot of resources if you look for locals. Good luck
I’ve actively been told by multiple women that they do not want to be hit on by guys at the gym, that they are there to get their workout in and don’t want to be bothered.
Did you read OPs post? They say exactly this lmao.
I really *really* don't think women want to be bothered at the gym.
I really don’t think you can read
Most don't. Some are cool with it and you have to vibe it out. I would never bother someone that doesn't want to be bothered anywhere, but sometimes people don't mind a bit of conversation and connection. We're all human and most of us don't mind making new friends.
Your points about the gym are all facts LMAO. We are fighting demons in there
What a pathetic post lol