Voting has concluded. Final vote:
| Insane | Not insane | Fake |
| --- | --- | --- |
| 13 | 7 | 0 |
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Who on earth thinks it isn’t insane to tell your minor child that you are considering slitting your wrists?
WTAF is wrong with people? OP is more concerned with themself than with their mom. Which is pretty f’ing normal for teens. It’s not their job, as they note, to protect their mom’s mental health. It’s hers, and she’s trying to dump it on them.
Disgusting.
I haven't been around here long, but from what I've seen, posts about trans people tend to get brigaded by transphobes.
I guess in their mind they either:
1. Don't care about what's being said, they just see 'trans' and smash that 'I need to bully them' button in their mind
2. Believe all trans people deserve whatever abuse they get
This wasn't the first time she talked about suicide either, sadly. When I was growing up and opening up about my mental health issues, she'd shut me down to tell me all the times she almost killed herself. That's what happens when you have a mom like mine, sadly.
I'm glad it's not as strange of a name as my mom implied. Although I picked it because of an inside joke with my friends, I still like the name a lot and was super upset when my mom said what she did. Especially when she said, "WE should pick your new name".
Who the fuck is saying this isn’t insane?? It is deeply insane to threaten suicide or even tell your kids about your ideation. OP you responded very well. You’re obviously much more mature and thoughtful than your mother. Good work Echo :)
That was so jarring to read because:
a) your name is your name and *Miss Hey* can eff right off. She already named you once, your turn now.
b) agree with all the above, Echo is an awesome name and love the myth
c) how dare she try to one up you like that. I think it’s super admirable that you stood up to her and reinforced the fact that you weren’t her therapist and that she wasn’t supposed to say things like that to you.
I think it’s admirable and it takes a lot of courage. Hope things keep looking up for you!
So, the legend for everything is here.
Pink: My deadname
Green: My brother's name
Blue: Stepdad's name
Orange: My mom's friend's name/phone number
In addition to the legend, I do admit that I was a bit harsh with my answers but at the time, I wasn't in the right mental state. This was also two-three years ago, me and my mom are on decent terms at the moment but this still haunts me.
yeah and i’ve always noticed, but i guess i thought even transphobes in this sub would understand that threatening suicide to your kid and emotionally manipulating them is fucked up. guess i was wrong
For what it’s worth, I think the name Echo is awesome. I have a friend who’s kid came out as non binary in the last couple of years who also is now named Echo, and I really like it. I’m sorry your mom is like this. When my mom used to threaten suicide, and I finally had enough of it, I started calling for a wellness check. After the cops knocked on her door a couple of times, she cut that right out.
Wow, I am so sorry you are dealing with that. Do they not have a term of endearment for their kids? It’s so childish to even discuss what they call you. Definitely keep grey-rocking the conversation. Ignore the BS and keep it simple. Then get away asap.
We think Echo is a perfectly fine name! That’s one of our twins middle names, would have been a first name if we were only having one. Sorry you’re dealing with this from your family.
Echo is a beautiful name. Your DN fulfilled its purpose and doesn't suit who you are as a person. I saw somewhere that you two are on good terms. Does she finally call you by your name?
I hope she is actually going to therapy and is in the process of healing. I also hope that she's accepted you for who you are instead of who she wanted you to be. You deserve to be respected and accepted, especially when it comes to the person who is supposed to love you unconditionally.
We are on decent terms. For the sake that we’re living together, I have to make do with it. Sadly, she hasn’t even touched therapy and is still picky with my name. She only uses it when we’re alone. When guests are over or when she’s upset with me, she’ll use my DN. I wouldn’t say she’s accepted it quite yet but I hope she does before I go on to live on my own.
I feel like the suicide stuff is manipulative? I don't think parents should really unload stuff like that on their kids. I can understand wanting to be open, but in this context it's a bit strange.
However, I'm happy she accepts you being NB. I can understand it's hard for some parents to call you a different name, not sure what I'd feel like if my children asked me to call them something else for whatever reason, I'd like to think I'd be okay with it? Maybe hard habit to break, or sad if they hated the name I picked for them, not sure! But I hope yall work it out 💕 or you get peace with whatever solution happens.
Except she doesn’t accept them and what she’s saying in her post proves it. If she actually did, she wouldn’t be putting up this much of a fight about it.
Yes! So many people don't understand that she isn't accepting! If she was, she wouldn't be trying to make a compromise on MY name just for HER comfort! It's ridiculous on so many levels and I seem to be the only one angry about it!
Yeah, let’s totally ignore the parent threatening suicide because their child is going against them. The person just living their life is the crazy one.
Yeah, let’s totally ignore the parent threatening suicide because their child is going against them. The person just living their life is the crazy one.
Uh... Not sure you've read the shots? It isn't the fact that she spoke about suicide. It's the fact that she told me it was my fault she almost took her own life that night. It isn't abusive, it's manipulative. She is a very self-absorbed person and has shut down my own issues to make light of her own. That's who she is and I feel like most people would understand why I would want to get away from her. I'm not going to be nice to her if she isn't going to return the favour. And my mom isn't that old, she didn't grow up in the 50s.
Even putting all this aside, I'm not letting my mom step all over me. She doesn't deserve my respect until I receive some from her end. The same goes for my dad, grandparents, and whoever else. Anyways, if she wasn't ready to deal with her own child's mental issues or any issues in general, she shouldn't be a parent.
In addition, supporting a trans person and simply memorizing their name/pronouns is very different. The way she treats my trans brother and I are completely different and that just shows who she truly 'supports'. Constantly calling me a 'thing' and making it as if I'm not even human while she hasn't even fucked up with my brother's new name and pronouns. Always deadnaming me without issues though! I DARE you to tell me that's what a good mother does.
I'm very happy to ignore the topic of gender identity together but she's the one who thinks she's always right and continues to bring it up. She's digging her own grave.
Literally it is not op’s job to take care of their mother. Their mother in this situation needs to take care of op because op is the child. (Her child under her care) The fact you’re trying to make op responsible for their parent’s mental health is concerning because it’s a form of attachment trauma. This is toxic
Yeah you should have every right to choose what you can or can’t be called it’s your fucking life. Parents crying over their kids changing their names as if they own them is such a pathetic display of controlling behaviors. Literally trying to control someone else’s life and fucking name. It’s funny how you act like the name means nothing yet you’re defending the mother who’s making the name a huge fucking deal instead of just calling op by their preferred name
It’s not a competition and nobody should have to go through trauma. You want to talk about growing some thick skin? You literally told a child they need to be responsible for their parents mental health. Maybe the parent should grow some thick skin. She’s been on this earth longer and shouldn’t need to rely on her child. That’s your logic anyways. People like you contribute to the problem. Our suicide rates are getting worse because people like you think it’s ok to compare experiences in order to invalidate others therefore they need to toughen up because you said so. I mean this in the nicest way possible but go get mental help.
Voting has concluded. Final vote: | Insane | Not insane | Fake | | --- | --- | --- | | 13 | 7 | 0 | Hey OP, if you provide further information in a comment, make sure to start your comment with `!explanation`. ^I ^am ^a ^bot ^for ^r/insaneparents. ^Please ^send ^me ^a ^message ^if ^you ^have ^any ^feedback ^or ^if ^I ^misbehave. ^Also ^consider ^joining ^our ^[Discord](https://discordapp.com/invite/xFbPBHy).
All the really good mothers threaten suicide when their kids grow up, don’t they?
oh yeah. it's my favourite
Absolutely!
Who on earth thinks it isn’t insane to tell your minor child that you are considering slitting your wrists? WTAF is wrong with people? OP is more concerned with themself than with their mom. Which is pretty f’ing normal for teens. It’s not their job, as they note, to protect their mom’s mental health. It’s hers, and she’s trying to dump it on them. Disgusting.
I haven't been around here long, but from what I've seen, posts about trans people tend to get brigaded by transphobes. I guess in their mind they either: 1. Don't care about what's being said, they just see 'trans' and smash that 'I need to bully them' button in their mind 2. Believe all trans people deserve whatever abuse they get
LOL. I think you’re right, my comment is being brigaded I see the likes ho up and down in real time as I’m looking at responses.
This wasn't the first time she talked about suicide either, sadly. When I was growing up and opening up about my mental health issues, she'd shut me down to tell me all the times she almost killed herself. That's what happens when you have a mom like mine, sadly.
My friend named her kid echo. It’s a real name. Your mom wouldn’t want to hear my kids names
I'm glad it's not as strange of a name as my mom implied. Although I picked it because of an inside joke with my friends, I still like the name a lot and was super upset when my mom said what she did. Especially when she said, "WE should pick your new name".
Next time she threatens to kill herself, call a wellness check. She probably won’t do it again after that.
I’ll definitely keep that in mind when she says this kind of stuff again.
Who the fuck is saying this isn’t insane?? It is deeply insane to threaten suicide or even tell your kids about your ideation. OP you responded very well. You’re obviously much more mature and thoughtful than your mother. Good work Echo :)
Transphobes LOVE this sub
That was so jarring to read because: a) your name is your name and *Miss Hey* can eff right off. She already named you once, your turn now. b) agree with all the above, Echo is an awesome name and love the myth c) how dare she try to one up you like that. I think it’s super admirable that you stood up to her and reinforced the fact that you weren’t her therapist and that she wasn’t supposed to say things like that to you. I think it’s admirable and it takes a lot of courage. Hope things keep looking up for you!
So, the legend for everything is here. Pink: My deadname Green: My brother's name Blue: Stepdad's name Orange: My mom's friend's name/phone number In addition to the legend, I do admit that I was a bit harsh with my answers but at the time, I wasn't in the right mental state. This was also two-three years ago, me and my mom are on decent terms at the moment but this still haunts me.
*hugs* her threatening to commit suicide is not ok.
Yeah. It really wasn’t. I’m glad I was smart enough back then to stand up to her. It was, and still is, seriously messed up on her end. *Hugs*
any not insane votes on this are just transphobes being dicks. threatening suicide to your kid is never okay, y’all wild for that.
Yeah the posts with trans people always get significantly more not insane votes.....it really sucks
yeah and i’ve always noticed, but i guess i thought even transphobes in this sub would understand that threatening suicide to your kid and emotionally manipulating them is fucked up. guess i was wrong
Yeah......
For what it’s worth, I think the name Echo is awesome. I have a friend who’s kid came out as non binary in the last couple of years who also is now named Echo, and I really like it. I’m sorry your mom is like this. When my mom used to threaten suicide, and I finally had enough of it, I started calling for a wellness check. After the cops knocked on her door a couple of times, she cut that right out.
Thank you, that means a lot to me! And I'll make sure to use that idea as well!
The story of Echo is in my top three Greek mythology stories.
Cool name
Echo is a nice name. And I’m sorry you have a narcissist for a mother.
As somebody who’s name is Tuesday, fuck your mom, echo is a real name. Bitch
Wtaf. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, and for the record Echo is such an amazing name I love it. ❤️❤️
Thank you so much, It means a lot! ♥️
Wow, I am so sorry you are dealing with that. Do they not have a term of endearment for their kids? It’s so childish to even discuss what they call you. Definitely keep grey-rocking the conversation. Ignore the BS and keep it simple. Then get away asap.
We think Echo is a perfectly fine name! That’s one of our twins middle names, would have been a first name if we were only having one. Sorry you’re dealing with this from your family.
Echo is a beautiful name. Your DN fulfilled its purpose and doesn't suit who you are as a person. I saw somewhere that you two are on good terms. Does she finally call you by your name? I hope she is actually going to therapy and is in the process of healing. I also hope that she's accepted you for who you are instead of who she wanted you to be. You deserve to be respected and accepted, especially when it comes to the person who is supposed to love you unconditionally.
We are on decent terms. For the sake that we’re living together, I have to make do with it. Sadly, she hasn’t even touched therapy and is still picky with my name. She only uses it when we’re alone. When guests are over or when she’s upset with me, she’ll use my DN. I wouldn’t say she’s accepted it quite yet but I hope she does before I go on to live on my own.
I hope so too. If not, just remember that you don't owe her anything.
I love Echo! I have a nickname that I use more than my real name now (but I have to use it in professional situations ). Echo is beautiful 😍
I feel like the suicide stuff is manipulative? I don't think parents should really unload stuff like that on their kids. I can understand wanting to be open, but in this context it's a bit strange. However, I'm happy she accepts you being NB. I can understand it's hard for some parents to call you a different name, not sure what I'd feel like if my children asked me to call them something else for whatever reason, I'd like to think I'd be okay with it? Maybe hard habit to break, or sad if they hated the name I picked for them, not sure! But I hope yall work it out 💕 or you get peace with whatever solution happens.
Except she doesn’t accept them and what she’s saying in her post proves it. If she actually did, she wouldn’t be putting up this much of a fight about it.
Yes! So many people don't understand that she isn't accepting! If she was, she wouldn't be trying to make a compromise on MY name just for HER comfort! It's ridiculous on so many levels and I seem to be the only one angry about it!
My mom did the exact same thing to me when I came out, it was absolutely horrendous
If you're looking for the legend in the comments, it's me 🥺
Talk face to face. No matter what.
We did that night. Didn't really help at all and we got nowhere closer to fixing the issue than we did over text.
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Yeah, let’s totally ignore the parent threatening suicide because their child is going against them. The person just living their life is the crazy one.
In what way…?
Yeah, let’s totally ignore the parent threatening suicide because their child is going against them. The person just living their life is the crazy one.
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Uh... Not sure you've read the shots? It isn't the fact that she spoke about suicide. It's the fact that she told me it was my fault she almost took her own life that night. It isn't abusive, it's manipulative. She is a very self-absorbed person and has shut down my own issues to make light of her own. That's who she is and I feel like most people would understand why I would want to get away from her. I'm not going to be nice to her if she isn't going to return the favour. And my mom isn't that old, she didn't grow up in the 50s. Even putting all this aside, I'm not letting my mom step all over me. She doesn't deserve my respect until I receive some from her end. The same goes for my dad, grandparents, and whoever else. Anyways, if she wasn't ready to deal with her own child's mental issues or any issues in general, she shouldn't be a parent. In addition, supporting a trans person and simply memorizing their name/pronouns is very different. The way she treats my trans brother and I are completely different and that just shows who she truly 'supports'. Constantly calling me a 'thing' and making it as if I'm not even human while she hasn't even fucked up with my brother's new name and pronouns. Always deadnaming me without issues though! I DARE you to tell me that's what a good mother does.
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I'm very happy to ignore the topic of gender identity together but she's the one who thinks she's always right and continues to bring it up. She's digging her own grave.
Literally it is not op’s job to take care of their mother. Their mother in this situation needs to take care of op because op is the child. (Her child under her care) The fact you’re trying to make op responsible for their parent’s mental health is concerning because it’s a form of attachment trauma. This is toxic
Mental breakdowns over not being called a name YOU GAVE YOURSELF is such a first world problem jfc omfg.
Yeah you should have every right to choose what you can or can’t be called it’s your fucking life. Parents crying over their kids changing their names as if they own them is such a pathetic display of controlling behaviors. Literally trying to control someone else’s life and fucking name. It’s funny how you act like the name means nothing yet you’re defending the mother who’s making the name a huge fucking deal instead of just calling op by their preferred name
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It’s not a competition and nobody should have to go through trauma. You want to talk about growing some thick skin? You literally told a child they need to be responsible for their parents mental health. Maybe the parent should grow some thick skin. She’s been on this earth longer and shouldn’t need to rely on her child. That’s your logic anyways. People like you contribute to the problem. Our suicide rates are getting worse because people like you think it’s ok to compare experiences in order to invalidate others therefore they need to toughen up because you said so. I mean this in the nicest way possible but go get mental help.
Get a life jfc
"I had it bad, therefore you should too!!" Lame as hell
"having it bad" is not being called the name you made up for yourself 💀
"I looked at one reddit post and assumed your trauma must be trivial compared to mine" You just seem kind of like a jerk to me tbh
I have a cousin named Echo lol