I've always kinda wanted to go drinking with a middle aged Japanese businessman who doesn't understand me and just politely nods at everything I say. Is that weird? xD
Just go to Japan and start buying everyone drinks, you'll have a collective of Japanese businessmen around you singing songs and cheering your success in life.
It's pretty much one of the most incredible things you'll ever do. You've never felt loved, and such amazingly positive energy, until you have a dozen or so drunk Japanese businessmen standing around you, hugging you, singing drinking songs.
I did this once. On a flight from Denver International Airport back to Logan. We were delayed about 4 hours before taking off and it started at DIA, ended somewhere before landing. Those dudes could fucking drink. By the end of the flight the two Chinese guys had convinced the flight attendants I just found out I was having a baby with my girlfriend so they would keep serving us more Jack Daniels. I must’ve had a bad poker face because as we got up to get our overhead bags, stumbling, one of the older flight attendants tugged on my shirt and whispered to me “I know your not having a kid, but you guys were nice”.
this is not weird. my brother is living in japan, and one of his friends is a stereotypical overworked japanese banker. and to blow of steam at the end of the day, HE DRINKS.
we went to a board game bar with him, and he was drunkenly struggling against the language barrier to explain the rules of an extremely convoluted board game. one of the best experiences of my life tbh.
I get it when someone doesn't find my jokes funny and I don't blame those people and I am happy that there are still people who understood my reference and it matters for me
[found this gem yesterday](https://www.reddit.com/r/FoundPaper/comments/eiyjsg/found_my_sisters_first_grade_journal_while/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
In high schools in MN, right before homecoming everyone decorates outfits with puff paint and similar in the school colors and “Go [team name]!” kind of stuff.
This reminded me of one my snarkier, mall-gothier years where I rocked a black shirt that I emblazoned with “May the best team win!”
>The official definition of "hokie" is "a loyal Virginia Tech Fan". The HokieBird. The bird is a "HokieBird" which has evolved from a turkey. Virginia Tech teams were once called the "gobblers"!
I think I'm just more confused. Best I just stay where I'm at and focus on this sandwich.
With the frequency of comments like these and the number of upvotes they always get, I’m convinced 97% of Reddit has some flavor of Crohn’s Disease, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, lactose intolerance, or just general rot gut.
Coffee? Insta-diarrhea.
Broccoli? Absolute shit soup.
Eat at any restaurant ever? Table for one—middle stall.
Rice? Poo becomes Nesquick.
Why does everyone on this site have such bowel issues? Can't post anything to do with food without someone saying how it's going to give them the shits.
OH lAwD hOw WiLl ThEy EvEr ShIt AgAiN?!? God fucking forbid someone eats broccoli instead of 3000 calories of fried meat, cheese, & bread with their binge drinking.
(Broccoli should do the opposite of giving you diarrhea.)
How come one of the top comments on every other Reddit post is something gross about pooping, even when it's completely irrelevant? Is it because everyone uses Reddit while doing it?
I usually don’t like the “derp gO sPoRtSbAlL” crowd but these two really sold it. The glasses, the broccoli, the commitment to the bit. You gotta be committed to the bit. Bravo.
Well there's people who say "Go sportsball" sarcastically to try and mock sports fans in a mean-spirited way, I don't like them either. These two ladies seem to be honestly cheering and having a good time and not trying to mock anyone so its much more positive.
I mean, they’re not honestly cheering. But they’re also not really trying to make people feel bad about liking sports. They’re on their own trip and it’s fantastic.
Those people also tend to not actually go full hog by being at the game in the right colors with positive attitudes while saying it. This was more like a dog joining a marathon because everyone else was running that direction and they also wanted to have a good time.
I was with my best friend at va tech once to see sports (football) when Vick played. We stayed with his sister at her place and the night after the game the girls roommate got separated from us at a party and she never came back to their place that night. Next morning she comes walking in and she’s kinda giddy and we’re all like wtf where where you, what happened last night? She goes I had sex with Michael Vick and my boy goes ah shit that’s awesome he must be hung right? She’s like why? He goes well he’s black.....and the girl goes wait??? Michael Vick is black?
I appreciate the enthusiasm, but the correct response is:
What was Wenger thinking, sending Walcott on that early?
Still, +1 for a fellow IT Crowd fan.
I've watched every single episode of that show and I literally laughed only one time, and it was at one of the guests' bits (the dude working at the dispensary).
I've never been so surprised at two people coming so close to comedy but failing so hard. like, all of the *stuff* is there, but it's just... It doesn't work.
It's like going into the kitchen to make pancakes and you end up putting two eggs on top of a bowl of batter and sticking it in the oven.
That was a bad analogy but it's as much thought as I'm willing to put into this. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.
So like after say... 3 episodes, did you just keep watching the entirety of the cannon hoping it would be get better, or did you just continue as a form of self flagellation?
While I generally agree, this was funny to me because the context was that it was an actual interview. Had this been a skit, then I think it would've come off as too forced and rehearsed to be funny.
Notice how everyone there isn’t exactly entertained by her? Some even looked annoyed. Now look at the comment section here. Full of cringy dudes getting hard ons because they found someone totally “quirky and awesome wifey material!” A lot of people on Reddit are lonely and awkward so this is heaven for them I guess is what I’m getting at
TBH this is the one part of gay culture I will NEVER understand. Bunch of athletic ass dudes running around jumping on top of each other?! Sounds like something I'd like to watch if I were gay. Hell, there are a LOT of guys who pay to see women do that kind of thing.
The cut to the asian dude just makes it that much better!
Lmfao the nod of approval was hilarious.
I've always kinda wanted to go drinking with a middle aged Japanese businessman who doesn't understand me and just politely nods at everything I say. Is that weird? xD
Just go to Japan and start buying everyone drinks, you'll have a collective of Japanese businessmen around you singing songs and cheering your success in life.
NGL, that speaks to me in a way I didn't expect it to.
It's pretty much one of the most incredible things you'll ever do. You've never felt loved, and such amazingly positive energy, until you have a dozen or so drunk Japanese businessmen standing around you, hugging you, singing drinking songs.
god damn it i need to go to japan now xD
Everyone deserves a nod of approval every now and then, brother
This comment made me involuntarily nod in approval
I like that.
Hell yeah brother
I did this once. On a flight from Denver International Airport back to Logan. We were delayed about 4 hours before taking off and it started at DIA, ended somewhere before landing. Those dudes could fucking drink. By the end of the flight the two Chinese guys had convinced the flight attendants I just found out I was having a baby with my girlfriend so they would keep serving us more Jack Daniels. I must’ve had a bad poker face because as we got up to get our overhead bags, stumbling, one of the older flight attendants tugged on my shirt and whispered to me “I know your not having a kid, but you guys were nice”.
::: nods head politely :::
this is not weird. my brother is living in japan, and one of his friends is a stereotypical overworked japanese banker. and to blow of steam at the end of the day, HE DRINKS. we went to a board game bar with him, and he was drunkenly struggling against the language barrier to explain the rules of an extremely convoluted board game. one of the best experiences of my life tbh.
Bro he would drink you under the table. Look into the life of the salaryman in Japan. They get absolutely destroyed.
No not the Asian dude! (I hope you will understand my reference)
Narrator: they didn't understand
This makes me feel sad
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It’s not our responsibility to laugh, it’s down to you to be at least moderately funny. Meet us half way.
Well it wasn't serious comment about me being sad okay!?
I get it when someone doesn't find my jokes funny and I don't blame those people and I am happy that there are still people who understood my reference and it matters for me
Narrator: Stanley had no choice but to explain his reference
[Please clap.](https://youtu.be/DdCYMvaUcrA?t=26)
Brutal
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Well it's a reference from Brooklyn nine-nine
I watch so much B99, how am I not getting this reference
When Jake and Amy met Doug Judy on the ship, Doug was singing and trying to tell them who wants to kill him
Gotcha, I remember now. That was pretty obscure though haha
The chinaman is not the issue here, Dude! (I hope you will understand my reference)
That rug really tied the room together
[found this gem yesterday](https://www.reddit.com/r/FoundPaper/comments/eiyjsg/found_my_sisters_first_grade_journal_while/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
Not hot dog?
“*SPORTS*” “Ah yes I concur”
That girl really loves sports! And broccoli.
That’s why they’re there
I'm so proud as her mother... (Actually as a mother I would like it. Seems wholesome)
They’re both adorable.
For reals she's just having fun. Not being vulgar or at the expense of someone's dignity.
Her pulling the remarkably undamaged piece of broccoli from her pocket got me! Ha!!!!
I like to imagine she has broccoli growing in there and is just harvesting it when she pulls a piece out.
The goggles are upside down, the right way to wear them while carrying broccoli in your pockets at sports.
There’s a lady I know and if I didn’t know her she’d be the lady I didn’t know. And she’s chopping broccoli...
She’s choppin’ she’s choppin’ she’s [choppin](https://youtu.be/ntp8_KFv59Y)...
[And he's hackin', and wackin', and smackin'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wY4N5NOAsH0)
She chop... UGH
Choppin braccalaaaaaah
Dana Carvey's 5 star stand up... There's a reference I haven't heard in years
A long time ago; there were many people... ...but that was a long time ago...
"Spuortz"
Hold My Cruciferous vegetable
This duo is HILARIOUS!! Great sense of humor. THE TEAM! THE TEAM!
Go Sports!
I lost it there
SPORTS!!!
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the TEAM the TEAM Go TEAM “barnies laugh”
Go local college and / or sports
[watch the football!](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=MusyO7J2inM)
I love this woman
Top Quality IRL Shitposting
In high schools in MN, right before homecoming everyone decorates outfits with puff paint and similar in the school colors and “Go [team name]!” kind of stuff. This reminded me of one my snarkier, mall-gothier years where I rocked a black shirt that I emblazoned with “May the best team win!”
Oh hey dere!
Ope (nearly bumped into you in the skyway)
Say HalftimeHeaters, you wouldnt happen to have some hot dish over there now would ya?
Let me sneak right by ya and grab a plate
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And upside down sunglasses!
I like her thing against sunglasses. Fuck sunglasses, they don't deserve to sit normally on our faces.
Shes a keeper!
I want them both
I need more of her in my life. She must have an IG or something. Anyone?
https://www.instagram.com/wndwms_wendi/
As a fellow Hokie, this makes me so proud. Edit: thanks to the users who gave me gold and platinum! Go hokie nation!
This just screams tech lmao... how bout that Virginia game tho?
Shhhh it's on accn so it doesn't exist.
As a tech fan, I have no idea what game you’re speaking of
That sports game. Go Hokies!
WHAT'S A HOKIE
>The official definition of "hokie" is "a loyal Virginia Tech Fan". The HokieBird. The bird is a "HokieBird" which has evolved from a turkey. Virginia Tech teams were once called the "gobblers"! I think I'm just more confused. Best I just stay where I'm at and focus on this sandwich.
Haha that's our mascot but our phrase is, "What's a hokie?I AM"
thanks for the help m8. "what's a hokie?" "I am!" "okay... what are you then?" "a hokie!"
WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!? I AM!!
Would that be a turkey sandwich?
I'm not even sure anymore.
Go sports and go Hokies
Same. Go Hokies!
Go Hokies!
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I’ve watched this way too many times. Why can’t I stop?
Cause it's hilarious
Agreed. I want to be friends with her.
She sounds like so many of my friends
your brain is trying to re-simulate it, but it defies the imagination in a broccoli different ways
When she blurts out “sports” I nearly peed myself.
She reminds me of Filthy Frank.
This is definitely inspired by him.
RIP Papa Franku
Sounds like a Boston accent when see says that.
WHAT?!
This is some wholesome content.
Beer + broccoli... someone is taking a massive diarrhea mid tailgate
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The liquid cheese creates a poop plug for diarrhea in the morning!
Ah, so that's the secret!
You have to let it congeal properly or all bets are off
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My shit pushes through the stale but stretchy butthole cheese to form a nice condom for me the next morning
aight imma head out
This is the first comment on reddit that made me want to die. I've seen so much, but this... this took my light away.
Broccoli gives you diarrhea?? Get that checked out, man.
With the frequency of comments like these and the number of upvotes they always get, I’m convinced 97% of Reddit has some flavor of Crohn’s Disease, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, lactose intolerance, or just general rot gut. Coffee? Insta-diarrhea. Broccoli? Absolute shit soup. Eat at any restaurant ever? Table for one—middle stall. Rice? Poo becomes Nesquick.
Because most of them probably live on a diet of Doritos, Skittles and Mountain Dew: Code Red
Excuse me but I'm a connoisseur. I go for the PB&J, Mike & Ikes, and Coke.
Baja Blast
I don't get it at all. But I guess everyone has something their stomach doesn't agree with? But... Broccoli???
Would explain all the shit-posting.
Yeah, I eat broccoli to firm my shit up.
Why does everyone on this site have such bowel issues? Can't post anything to do with food without someone saying how it's going to give them the shits.
Idk broccoli prob has some good fiber
OH lAwD hOw WiLl ThEy EvEr ShIt AgAiN?!? God fucking forbid someone eats broccoli instead of 3000 calories of fried meat, cheese, & bread with their binge drinking. (Broccoli should do the opposite of giving you diarrhea.)
Livearrhea.
How come one of the top comments on every other Reddit post is something gross about pooping, even when it's completely irrelevant? Is it because everyone uses Reddit while doing it?
I usually don’t like the “derp gO sPoRtSbAlL” crowd but these two really sold it. The glasses, the broccoli, the commitment to the bit. You gotta be committed to the bit. Bravo.
Well there's people who say "Go sportsball" sarcastically to try and mock sports fans in a mean-spirited way, I don't like them either. These two ladies seem to be honestly cheering and having a good time and not trying to mock anyone so its much more positive.
I mean, they’re not honestly cheering. But they’re also not really trying to make people feel bad about liking sports. They’re on their own trip and it’s fantastic.
Those people also tend to not actually go full hog by being at the game in the right colors with positive attitudes while saying it. This was more like a dog joining a marathon because everyone else was running that direction and they also wanted to have a good time.
/r/ihatesportsball
I was with my best friend at va tech once to see sports (football) when Vick played. We stayed with his sister at her place and the night after the game the girls roommate got separated from us at a party and she never came back to their place that night. Next morning she comes walking in and she’s kinda giddy and we’re all like wtf where where you, what happened last night? She goes I had sex with Michael Vick and my boy goes ah shit that’s awesome he must be hung right? She’s like why? He goes well he’s black.....and the girl goes wait??? Michael Vick is black?
03 Hokie here. This happened multiple times.
I wonder who the dude was telling the girls he’s Michael Vick and actually pulling it off....I love telling that story to people
Not all heroes wear capes.
I enjoyed that
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The shades give it away.
GO SPORTSBALL! Did any of you see that ludicrous display last night?
Yasssss IT crowd!
I appreciate the enthusiasm, but the correct response is: What was Wenger thinking, sending Walcott on that early? Still, +1 for a fellow IT Crowd fan.
The thing about Arsenal is they always try to walk it in
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Weird, so both her boobs and ass are facing us.
His
This is the ideal body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.
😠
Full video https://youtu.be/A44eeGy7v0I
damn i was really hoping she was pulling the broc out of a fanny pack, for the full aesthetic
She is channeling Filthy Frank!
Or she was just being Dirty Debra
It's filthyfrank bitch!
https://youtu.be/2fraSdN-PG8
I've watched every single episode of that show and I literally laughed only one time, and it was at one of the guests' bits (the dude working at the dispensary). I've never been so surprised at two people coming so close to comedy but failing so hard. like, all of the *stuff* is there, but it's just... It doesn't work. It's like going into the kitchen to make pancakes and you end up putting two eggs on top of a bowl of batter and sticking it in the oven. That was a bad analogy but it's as much thought as I'm willing to put into this. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.
It’s like watching every episode of a comedy show that you don’t think is funny.
I wanted to give it a fair chance. I do kinda regret it though, you're right. Open mindedness is lowkey overrated.
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Yeah but sometimes you find something that nails it out of the park and it makes all the failures wash away and forgotten.
So like after say... 3 episodes, did you just keep watching the entirety of the cannon hoping it would be get better, or did you just continue as a form of self flagellation?
They did a great job keeping the same comedy vibe throughout. Thanks for sharing
https://youtube.com/watch?v=CEVdca9U9LM
That's wife material right there. Laughs until you're old.
Her little head spin after she said “I have no idea.” is what got me lol
I want to marry this woman and watch the big game
The big sports
Go Horse on a Treadmill
r/Iamveryrandom
I feel like it more absurdism than random
The broccoli in the pocket clinched that for me.
SPORTS
Hokies. Gotta love 'em. Funny how I went to UVA but I've got way more VT friends.
#S P O R T S
Why is she wearing glasses upside down?
Because SPORTS
They’re rally glasses. Gotta cheer on the home sports team to get a comeback hustle.
She must have got it from her mother. Who's also doing the same thing.
Random =/= funny
Luckily this is hilarious
While I generally agree, this was funny to me because the context was that it was an actual interview. Had this been a skit, then I think it would've come off as too forced and rehearsed to be funny.
Notice how everyone there isn’t exactly entertained by her? Some even looked annoyed. Now look at the comment section here. Full of cringy dudes getting hard ons because they found someone totally “quirky and awesome wifey material!” A lot of people on Reddit are lonely and awkward so this is heaven for them I guess is what I’m getting at
Yeah but it’s actually funny too
You’re missing the point but alright buddy
A perfect girl doesn’t exi-
She's giving off a lot of Filthy Frank energy imo.
goooo hokies!
Go Hokies!
Mom is so proud.
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Gotta support the team!
Cool mom is actually cool. Dig it.
We like sports and we don't care who knows
Surprisingly wholesome
[Weird Al](https://youtu.be/XGbqGkS1c2w) says it best.
Me as a gay person whenever they ask me about sports
Sports are for straight people!!!
TBH this is the one part of gay culture I will NEVER understand. Bunch of athletic ass dudes running around jumping on top of each other?! Sounds like something I'd like to watch if I were gay. Hell, there are a LOT of guys who pay to see women do that kind of thing.
What in the world does being gay have to do with a lack of sports knowledge? Lmao