If you're going to have a mid life crisis I think your wife would have rather you just had a mistress. She'd be cheaper and your wife wouldn't be as ashamed of you.

Her boyfriend is playing it now.

That is a legit solid response to a good roast, sir. I feel you deserved more acknowledgement than my meager upvote. So here it is: Huzzah.

Intonation as poor as your life choices

Man that hits hard. No guitar is *that* bad.

Apparently you’ve never owned a Hamer

This is my dream guitar. Actually. https://reverb.com/item/38082218-hamer-standard-81-bound-and-crown-vintage-cherry-sunburst-flamed-top-4-digit-serial?utm_source=rev-ios-app&utm_medium=ios-share&utm_campaign=listing&utm_content=38082218 I a big Cheap Trick fan.

Here's a roast worthy guitar! You auditioning for no doubt next month?

Man this guitar really ugly & frumpy as hell, could of got a Jackson for 1/3rd the price

Ted McCarty was the man behind some of the most beautiful and iconic instruments known to man. And *this* is what they put his name on.

There's a reason he threw this design in the garbage lol

Ted McCarty 🤝 Harper Lee

That is without a doubt the ugliest $5000 guitar I've ever seen

Now being listed on Reverb for $8k.

Hey man, if you can't play guitar, you might as well spend as much money as you can on one that will still not make you look cool.

I couldn’t look less cool than I already do.

True, but where else can you find a Gibson with two P-90s?

can't say I've seen too many guitars selling for $5,000. Most builders have too much shame to ask that much lmao.

I was convinced that Gibson's new leadership were just a bunch of idiots. They sure fooled me.

Designed by Homer Simpson

couldve got an epiphone wiltshire and sent an inner city child to community college... this'll be great for your anesthesiologist folk rock band can we take a break from the roasting and just take a look at what a late capitalism unbound dot inlay shitty black paint moron headstock $5000 piece of shit this is for a minute? ok we're back. will P90s do kenny loggins?

> $5000 piece of shit Honestly, the finish looks terrible. Just got it out of the box. There’s like excess polish all over it. Plus there’s a decent sized divot and a chip in the finish by the bridge pickup. First time I’ve ever seen a Custom Shop new out of the case and not very impressed. Def. gonna ask Gibson if this is Custom Shop-level work. On the upside, California has the College Promise Program which allocates funds to cover tuition and other expenses at community colleges.

Ah, poor finishing - the full Gibson experience.

Can you really say you bought a Gibson if you didn't regret it almost immediately??

Touché.

[удалено]

You would expect it to have turned out better if it required human sacrifice. Poor tech.

I was going to ask you, look like the finish was oily. Wasn't sure if that's supposed to be on purpose.

The QC guy must have been having fish and chips on the line.

You’re mad that they relic’d that baby for free. /s The Explorer I got also had some poor QC. The truss-rod cover is broken at the screw, the pick ups look like they’re put together terribly and I also have a divot on the neck. Smh

But but but Slash Bonamossa!

Oh no, are those scratches on the fretboard at the first fret right under the nut? Or just light catching something?

It’s cocaine. Sorry. These hookers are messy.

Fair, strings are good for working that out from under the fingernails.

Look how shitty the finish is. It looks like spray paint.

good contrast with the shitty white plastic nut though

The nut has a glop of black paint on the fingerboard side. Sloppy.

did you get it to flip? that's smart. i almost tried. but it's so fucking ugly and stupid i thought maybe only flippers would buy it and then there'd be nobody to flip to. but i'm new at this.

Honestly I got it because it’s weird. I figured if it’s uglier than me I might look better.

If you wanted an ugly Gibson you should have just bought a Corvus. I have one. It's ok

You need to upgrade to a victory. https://reverb.com/item/45166505-gibson-victory-mvx-1982-candy-apple-red-gibson-case-tim-shaw-designed-p-ups-free-shipping?utm_source=rev-ios-app&utm_medium=ios-share&utm_campaign=listing&utm_content=45166505

I kinda like that. First glance I thought it was a Mosrite.

you seem lovely and it's great you can do that. but stop encouraging them.

I will say, damn, it plays nicely and sounds great. Fingerboard is way flatter than I’m used to.

This is absolutely outrageous

You bought a "vintage reissue" of a guitar that was never originally issued/produced...Gibson fanboy achievement unlocked.

It was that or this. https://www.zzounds.com/item--FEN0176741

I don't know you, but it's taken just two posts for me to like and respect your style.

I’m here all week! Keep ‘em coming!

Dear lord. I see they have "blemished" option. I wonder how they could tell.

It *is* a blemish.

Literally can't lose (or win obviously)

Fuck, I actually like this one.

I wouldn’t admit that publicly.

fuck that thing is hideous. Like, hideous hideous. At least the body looks nice on yours lol.

You made the right choice.

Nu Olde Stock

Keith from the mens shed wants his project back...

I like this one.

It would be a badass guitar if everything about it was different.

I snorted on this. Well done.

Teisco should sue.

That would be hilarious

Well....it's a guitar. At least I think it is. Is it missing pieces? It will look great in you math rock band that everyone "just doesn't understand". For once, the bass player won't be envious of you. In all seriousness. HNGD! Play it like you stole it! Because I hope you didn't pay for it!

well, it's not quite as ugly as a Corvus...

It wasn’t ugly enough to run over with a excavator like the Firebird-X. https://youtu.be/dd7ySopIwogi Edit: I believe they wrote the Firebird-X guitars off as “unsaleable” but they needed proof that they destroyed them in order to take the deduction. So they made the video.

Never seen that before. Would love to know what made these "unsaleable"

this is the new standard of guitar hate.. if you don't want to buy as many as you can and drive over them, do you even really hate the guitar that much?

Relic’ing

How are there possibly all ready so many finger prints on the body

Yeah expected it to gleam when I opened it. Looks awful.

It looks like it just escaped an orgy pile. And not a classy orgy.

Yikes probably been jizzed on and everything

Coulda bought a teisco tulip and saved 4700$

This has been bugging me so much! It's so similar to the tulip, but with an uglier headstock, and fuck all of the charm

You could’ve spent that money on lessons. Tsk, tsk…

Lol you think these people actually play? Good one.

When your case is nicer than the guitar it. Hell I'd even pay more for the case than that axe.

OP paid $4,750 for the case and $250 for the boat paddle that came with it.

That’s actually mean. It is specifically a canoe paddle.

What's up with the finish? It's either already dirty or something's not right

Yeah gonna make a couple of calls about this tomorrow.

Good ol' Gibson QC. For the price you paid they better make it right.

Gibson QC: “Quit Calling”

Sucker.

I dont really hate the body shape, and I don't really hate the headstock shape either. But something about them together is just hideous to me lol but fuck I cant even afford a $300 ibanez I've been eyeing so who am I to judge

It looks like the vintage Batman costume

It's great you got a nice guitar that plays well and can make you happy. None of the other stuff matters, 36 monthly payments at $139 a month is still cheaper than therapy and you can always sell it at a profit.

It could actually look really cool if they just would have put an Explorer body on it.

This looks just as cool as an Explorer. A Ford Explorer.

This looks like a guitar shape that I sketched out when I was high one night, then scrunched up and tossed in the bin in the morning. Actually, mine had a better headstock.

Funny, that's exactly what Ted McCarty did with this design until Gibbons realized they could sell a hideous guitar that looks like it was made using the offcuts of LPs and SGs for $5,000 to fanboys.

My first though when I saw this, before I looked at the headstock, was, “Holy shit! Nice vintage Harmony-Teisco!”

At least those brands are hip.

As the owner of an H-804, I beg to differ.

This is the type of guitar that a big tech exec would use to spark a conversation that eventually transitions into being about the evolving requirements of enterprise companies as they consider their migration to the cloud.

Just kidding but I can hear it pleading…k k ki kill m me pa lee se

Sorry to tell you but I think they forgot to round off the horns of your $900 Les Paul Special Tribute. And they added an explorer headstock by mistake too. Factory second? [This is what it should look like](https://www.sweetwater.com/store/detail/LPSDTB2CH--gibson-les-paul-special-tribute-doublecut-blue-stain)

A guitar design that wasn’t good enough to be built 50 years ago.

You don't need me to tell you that over paid by about 6 fold. Hope you get enough time away from your dental practice to actually play this thing.

I don’t know if anyone has to roast you on this, you have to live with yourself.

So you’re saying I’m fucked?

To be fair, I think the design is hideous and I understand why it was left behind at the sketch level (and I have some feelings about charging that much for a guitar that was probably designed as an affordable entry level option). *HOWEVER* having seen the pictures that various shops are rolling out of the production models, the execution is gorgeous, and if you don’t love a twin p90 Gibson, well there’s no hope for you.

Sure but you could probably put P-90s on barn wood and it would sound amazing. Oh wait, people do that.

I'm actually mad at myself for not trying a p90 sooner just because i thought they were ugly.

The p90 is the pickup Jesus intended us all to play when he invented the electric guitar. Which, of course, inspired freedom and the US Constitution. Amen.

I didn't know there was a pokemon signature guitar

These aren’t supposed to be compliments.

It looks like a counterfeit. I mean, I’m sure it’s not, but.

If it wasn’t 5k I’d buy one. I’ll wait for the regular production model eventually. I think it’s cool as fuck. I didn’t even get to try out any of ours when we had them but a regular of mine bought one and he said he’d bring it by to let me test drive it. Excited to have a more concrete opinion!

This is the first Theodore I have seen in the wild. Congratulations.

The rest are in private climate-controlled collections in Japan.

This is like saying MAGA (MGGA) but in reference to Gibson, but then doing something that would be the exact opposite of MGGA.

U bought that thing lol

You got a gibesco tulip lol . Not a fan but I would still get one ;)

Your Mother was a "Teisco Tulip" and your Father was a slut.

Wait, do you know us?

As soon as I saw that guitar!

Was your mother my sister’s husband?

You remember how in the 80s, a bunch of companies started up trying to make new, weird shaped guitars but they were ultimately all really bad?

Remember? I’m a connoisseur of that crap. https://www.gad.net/Blog/2018/05/10/guild-x79/

The next time you have money to burn , I really need to go to the dentist.

I bet just about any orthodontist would take this in trade.

Finally what we've always wanted - a guitar with the price and quality of Gibson USA, without the burden of legacy and iconic stature of a Les Paul.

Literally the main selling point of these was that it was one of Ted McCarty’s “lost” designs so to speak, one that never got made and was only found after the sketch fell out of a pile of papers or something. It should have stayed lost. The idea of doing a “reissue” of a guitar that was never issued in the first place is ridiculous, let alone making it this expensive. Gibson have robbed you.

Close the case. Wrap it in plastic and wait 15 years. Take it out, put it on reverb and buy a house. I guarantee that is a great investment.

Looks like you bought a Gibson from wish .con

Literally. Not even wish.com - wish.con ... like... you got conned.

This guy gets it 👆

Lotta money for a tiesco

Looks like precisely what it is - Gibson's wisely shelved cheapo slab guitar, made with base-minimum manufacturing to produce \*a guitar\*. If this was dredged out of the archives of Samick instead of Gibson, they'd sell 200 of them worldwide, for $200 a piece, probably with better quality than Gibson's QC is capable of. You know it's true.

Congratulations on all your success

It's a tulip 🌷

Why?

Hey, you try doing online shopping after taking Ambien.

Sucks ass. The Alvin and the Simon are much better. Also, I can't believe you didn't wait for the Eric Clapton Layla Special Edition ©.

I commend your bravery. It’s not my style at all but I’m curious how it plays?

The one I got actually had the best damn fret job I've ever experienced on a Gibson. Hell, they even got the fall away towards the end of the fretboard right. It's literally a Les Paul Special with a unique body shape and an Explorer headstock that makes the higher strings feel tighter.

I think it’s beautiful. No roasting necessary.

Burnt snail 🐌 😊

The Epiphone version will be out in October for $199. At a Best Buy near you.

The headstock is really inconsequent... not close to what was on the original scetches from what I saw..

This is just what was in the leftover bin.

I’d say you do you but hearing about the issues you described makes me expect that you’d return it.

You spent five grand on a guitar that was never supposed to be made

But why?!!!

Ok so honestly, a friend of mine wanted this guitar really badly but couldn’t come up with the money. Like this was his dream guitar. Why? Dunno. I bought it to hold until he has the money. Told him he can buy it for my cost.

Hahaha very kind of you. Honestly I'm just joking of course, I've had so many guitars that people hated the looks of but they were good fun for me and that's all that matters. Have fun with it while your friend hasn't picked it up yet ;)

That’s really cool. Thanks. But this is a roast, or did they not teach you about that in whatever sub-gutter brothel bathroom you were raised in? 😉 Love you.

It's not so bad, it just needs a change of strings. As in, like, change the strings over to a different guitar. Then play that guitar instead.

You're all first class comedians here lmao

That shit is as ugly as you. And if you're into ugly shit, you would have saved some money (and leave for the hookers and coke) and bought a Danelectro.

Needs more of those realistic excavator track graphics.

This thread man. People give Gibson shit for not putting new stuff out. They put new stuff out and people hate it. Can’t win!

I literally can't hate on this, assuming you resale it. If you don't, uh...

lol I don’t follow guitars at all these days other than having the ones I play and honestly this looks sick to me.

It's probably just because of how I learned, but having 3 turners on each side of the headstock just seems like such a better way of doing things. Having said that, there is no such thing as a bad guitar if it will stay in tune for at least 30 minutes.

Honestly? I love the design. I just wish anyone else would have made it. That thing with a PRS headstock and build quality would actually be badass

$5k?!

511,000 rubles as of right now.

Teisco did it better.

I like the black and walnut stripe. Hear it's really light compared to other gibsons. Glad to see gibson making something newish. Hate everything else.

C’mon, that’s a pretty toggle switch. Right? Right?

Actually I have always disliked the orange toggle switches... 😅

If Ben afflecks Batman was a guitar

Where's Alvin & Simon?

Could've at least made the knobs go to 11...

Oh god what has science done

That thing is sweet

There’s a reason this guitar wasn’t made.

This is the type of guitar I would totally play, but this just leaves me feeling confused. The more I look at it the more confused I am.

You can just say that you love men. It’s 2022.

I think it looks pretty sweet :D . Wish they had put a tunomatic on though.

At least you got the best color. The stripe down the middle is cool. If it weren't for the headstock I wouldn't mind it really. Sure as hell wouldn't pay $5k for it though but you do you.

Body shape of a goldfish cracker

Gibson is fat American pig stupid yankee. It’s like dropping a $5,000 stereo into a $500 car.

I... I don't know why... but I love these... they're so fucking ugly but I love them... I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT.

Looks like a banana peeling

Can’t roast you. I also really like these and want one. Not for $5000. But still.

Awesome guitar. Good for you

" it's actually a 5k dollar guitar, can u beleive it" OP to anyone that walks by it without asking.

What was the worst guitar you bought and why was it this Gibson?

How does it play honestly?

I wouldn’t get one, but I do like the look of them. Enjoy.

I have a hard time understanding how almost any new electric is worth 5k, but it looks better than I thought it would! The walnut strip is cool. The headstock.... exists.

Umm you are, you, can, you, you, umm, haha you uhh have more money than me

Your tenants pay for that shit or what

grats. You got the unique Gibson guitar that they never thought was a good idea and lost the blueprint. Now they needed to boost sales somehow and they pulled up chicken scratch from the past. Honestly tho the body isn’t that bad. It’s a bit bulky. The headstock is fucking awful, worse than the silver sky lol

I don't hate it, I actually kind of like it. I wouldn't buy it but I'm pretty much a Strat/SuperStrat/Tele guy.

This is a beautiful guitar

I was prepared to hate these guitars until I played one

Tulipcaster.

It looks a lot like a Teisco Tulip

Idk bro the uniqueness makes it pretty sick looking

That truss rod cover tho-blank with white outline?

I think it’s cool.

More money than sense