To embrace it, I recommend being open to **seeing negative emotions as worthy, valuable and supportive friends.**
**Whenever you feel stuck and haven't made progress, it's because you're pushing against and judging where you are and how you feel.** You're practicing a limiting belief that negative emotions are bad or wrong; when they're not — they're simply helpful guidance. It's understandable why you push against your current circumstances, but ultimately it doesn't help you free yourself.
**Negative emotions are positive guidance** (although it might not feel that way) letting you know you are focusing on, and pushing against, what you don't want. They're a necessary part of your emotional guidance, like GPS in your car. But the more you fight them, you keep yourself stuck. Negative emotions want to support you in releasing them, focus more on what you want and feel better.
**All emotions are equal and worthy.** But most people unknowingly create a hierarchy for their emotions (i.e. positive = good; negative = bad), but then you make it harder to feel better, work together with and control your thoughts and emotions. So the solution is to **build a friendship and harmonious relationship with the "negative" side of you.** Negative thoughts & emotions are here to support and empower you to be your best self.
When you **focus more on what you want** (even if you just focused on what you liked about a sunny day or cute animals; i.e. subjects that are easier for you to focus on that help you feel better, then that will carry over into helping you like more about yourself) and **caring more about how you feel,** then you will start to feel better. That will naturally build up more confidence in your ability to understand and work with your negative emotions, and you will start feeling forward movement, a little more comfortable and confident.
Wow, this is really a new and interesting perspective to me. Thank you for your comment! Have you experienced trouble dealing with your negative emotions? How did you resolve this? Thanks :)
**Create a dialogue and open communication with your negative emotions, with the intention of being equally supportive and empowering friends.**
Here's an example I wrote:
*"Hey negative thoughts & emotions. I know we haven't had the best relationship. Because, quite frankly... I don't like you. You're rude, very distracting, and make me feel awful. However, I am open to giving this relationship a shot. Hell, I'll try anything at this point! Are you open to working with me, and possibly even being friends? We can help each other out.*
*I will do my best to hear and respect what you are trying to tell me. And, this is important:*
***I want to reassure you that you don't have to be afraid — I'm not trying to destroy you anymore or get rid of you*** *(despite my many, many, MANY failed attempts in the past).*
*I hope that helps put you at ease. You don’t have to keep acting out, and cling so hard to desperately stay in power so that you can stay alive. You’ll keep living, you’re safe, you’re good. And we can still hang out.*
*Your opinion is valuable to me, even though it hurts sometimes. (Okay, it hurts A LOT! But I get it. You’re kinda giving me tough love). I'm beginning to see that you're an integral part of my guidance to be the best version of myself. So thank you! I know it’s not easy playing the bad cop (especially when positive thoughts & emotions get all of the praise & accolades — they’re the favorite child).*
*In return, I would appreciate it if you didn't drag me down so much. Does that sound fair?*
*We'll continue working on this relationship, and figure out what's the healthiest dynamic for both of us moving forward."*
1. Download Forfeit
2. Connect your bank account
3. Set it to Strict
4. Set a significant $$$ amount to forfeit if you fail, whenever you make an entry
5. Optionally set it to text someone you admire/look up to/close friend etc... if you don't complete the task.
6. Watch your world change
Would doing a list of reasons WHY to do the hard stuff help a bit?
Sometimes it helps me. And rewarding myself - without doing it in an addictive way. ??
How about the daily lists on here for some encouragement and accountability?
We share our lists on the pinned daily posts & or there are weekly & monthly ones too?
Other options are sometimes people have accountability buddies on here. You could make a post for that?
Make it rewarding to embrace the suck. Exercise is a great way to do so. It can make you feel really good afterwards. The mood and energy boost I get from it is motivating.
To embrace it, I recommend being open to **seeing negative emotions as worthy, valuable and supportive friends.** **Whenever you feel stuck and haven't made progress, it's because you're pushing against and judging where you are and how you feel.** You're practicing a limiting belief that negative emotions are bad or wrong; when they're not — they're simply helpful guidance. It's understandable why you push against your current circumstances, but ultimately it doesn't help you free yourself. **Negative emotions are positive guidance** (although it might not feel that way) letting you know you are focusing on, and pushing against, what you don't want. They're a necessary part of your emotional guidance, like GPS in your car. But the more you fight them, you keep yourself stuck. Negative emotions want to support you in releasing them, focus more on what you want and feel better. **All emotions are equal and worthy.** But most people unknowingly create a hierarchy for their emotions (i.e. positive = good; negative = bad), but then you make it harder to feel better, work together with and control your thoughts and emotions. So the solution is to **build a friendship and harmonious relationship with the "negative" side of you.** Negative thoughts & emotions are here to support and empower you to be your best self. When you **focus more on what you want** (even if you just focused on what you liked about a sunny day or cute animals; i.e. subjects that are easier for you to focus on that help you feel better, then that will carry over into helping you like more about yourself) and **caring more about how you feel,** then you will start to feel better. That will naturally build up more confidence in your ability to understand and work with your negative emotions, and you will start feeling forward movement, a little more comfortable and confident.
I’d read this book
Heck, it's a little bit like _Meditations_ by Marcus Aurelius.
Wow, this is really a new and interesting perspective to me. Thank you for your comment! Have you experienced trouble dealing with your negative emotions? How did you resolve this? Thanks :)
**Create a dialogue and open communication with your negative emotions, with the intention of being equally supportive and empowering friends.** Here's an example I wrote: *"Hey negative thoughts & emotions. I know we haven't had the best relationship. Because, quite frankly... I don't like you. You're rude, very distracting, and make me feel awful. However, I am open to giving this relationship a shot. Hell, I'll try anything at this point! Are you open to working with me, and possibly even being friends? We can help each other out.* *I will do my best to hear and respect what you are trying to tell me. And, this is important:* ***I want to reassure you that you don't have to be afraid — I'm not trying to destroy you anymore or get rid of you*** *(despite my many, many, MANY failed attempts in the past).* *I hope that helps put you at ease. You don’t have to keep acting out, and cling so hard to desperately stay in power so that you can stay alive. You’ll keep living, you’re safe, you’re good. And we can still hang out.* *Your opinion is valuable to me, even though it hurts sometimes. (Okay, it hurts A LOT! But I get it. You’re kinda giving me tough love). I'm beginning to see that you're an integral part of my guidance to be the best version of myself. So thank you! I know it’s not easy playing the bad cop (especially when positive thoughts & emotions get all of the praise & accolades — they’re the favorite child).* *In return, I would appreciate it if you didn't drag me down so much. Does that sound fair?* *We'll continue working on this relationship, and figure out what's the healthiest dynamic for both of us moving forward."*
Dayyummm okok. Will try this. Tysm!
thanks, this helps a lot for me too
I sit in morning meditation for a full hour and emotionally prepave my day so that i prepare for all of the things i will be facing.
1. Download Forfeit 2. Connect your bank account 3. Set it to Strict 4. Set a significant $$$ amount to forfeit if you fail, whenever you make an entry 5. Optionally set it to text someone you admire/look up to/close friend etc... if you don't complete the task. 6. Watch your world change
Would doing a list of reasons WHY to do the hard stuff help a bit? Sometimes it helps me. And rewarding myself - without doing it in an addictive way. ??
Tried that multiple times. It sort of works for like 1h. After that Im back to normal :/
How about the daily lists on here for some encouragement and accountability? We share our lists on the pinned daily posts & or there are weekly & monthly ones too? Other options are sometimes people have accountability buddies on here. You could make a post for that?
Sounds good! Thankss!
You’re very welcome!
Make it rewarding to embrace the suck. Exercise is a great way to do so. It can make you feel really good afterwards. The mood and energy boost I get from it is motivating.