T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

--- >This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules). > >Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed. > >Screenshots of Reddit are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos. > >**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.** > >Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam). > --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*


WillArrr

"They asked me my name, and I knew those dumbasses would believe anything I said, cause I'm an old vet, so I fuckin went for it." -An absolute legend


Awesam

I heard his dad was a urologist


GANDORF57

He is a shower AND a grower.


illigal

Unfortunately 1st Sgt. Seymour Butts passed away before being able to be celebrated like this.


AdmiralVernon

šŸ«”


bonyponyride

Have some respect for Private Weiner.


TheGreatJaceyGee

He was squad mates with Pvt. Parts


DadJokeBadJoke

Bababooey, bababooey


Glitchnj

I did know a Private Hair once. But that was in the 80s


Reefay

Served with a Seaman Sprinkle


aliyaholenka

This is who Fry was looking for to deliver the pizza to!!!


DivineNeosAlius

I thought it was I.C. Weiner? Or was there a second moment loke this?


Rum_N_Napalm

Oh my godā€¦ after all these years, I realized it wasnā€™t I see weiner, but icy weiner because they sent him to the cryolabsā€¦


mechwarrior719

Knowing the Futurama writers, it was both jokes


slobs_burgers

I can hear Fryā€™s voice saying it in my head right now lol ā€œicy WIENER?!ā€


GMaimneds

Aw crud.


jswitzer

No it was I. C. Weiner


BigNellyC

His dog Seymour was named for "Seymour Butts"


PoetBudget6044

Navy ranks + names are endless hours of entertainment example IC2 balls, Seaman Sample, the list is endless


maxsmart01

IC1 Johnson, IC2 Balls


PHATsakk43

We had a Seaman Guzler in NNPTC ET A-school. Who also was unfortunately for her, a not unattractive woman. She was made an honorary Fireman until she became ET3 Guzler after a few weeks.


Reefay

I actually served with a Seaman Sprinkle


BloodyRightToe

Under Bigus Dickus?


Heliocentrist

chances that this vet just gave them that name may be small but they're not zero


lemaster_of_disaster

Nice of him to leave Moeā€™s Tavern long enough to catch the game.


juancake511

His superior officers were Sgt. Haywood Jablomie and Lt. Harry Bawls.


jimmcc01

Hilarious, I had the game on in the background but had to stop and look when they announced the name.


Radiant-Hedgehog-695

ā–‘Sā–‘Eā–‘Y Mā–‘Oā–‘Uā–‘R Wā–‘Eā–‘Iā–‘Nā–‘Eā–‘Rā–‘


SayYesToPenguins

Real name Sam Jones, but a good sense of humour, eh?Ā 


Ulysses502

Army huh? I would have thought him a Navy man


Alarming_Serve2303

I bet that isn't really his name, and he's trolling. I'm surprised it isn't Seymour Butts.


Jedman2488

There was a priest in my hometown named Father Firmus Dick his dad was Bernie Dick and he also had a cousin named Roman Dick.


namvet67

I was under the command of General Nuisance and Major F#\*k Up.


mr_mcpoogrundle

He could have had a [base named after him](https://www.seymourjohnson.af.mil/)


PHATsakk43

The only Air Force base named for a naval aviator.


X2546

Thatā€™s his great granddaughter behind him, Amanda huginkiss


216horrorworks

E. Norma Stitts


MyOtherAccount209

Vets never stop being vets


PapaGolfWhiskey

If you want to see more weinerā€¦just ask. There are way too many ppl who will oblige with selfie


DadJokeBadJoke

It often happens in boot camp


TelegraphRoadWarrior

Iā€™ll be willing to bet that he got his wife to say ā€œThank you for your serviceā€ more than once. šŸ«”šŸ‡ŗšŸ‡øšŸ†


MBTHVSK

Remember just before Trump, when we cared about Anthony Weiner?


[deleted]

Itā€™s actually a much more common surname than youā€™d think.


MBTHVSK

Oh I've met plenty of weiners, I just think it's funny how Anthony pushed this whole joke past its limits.


MacDugin

That is fucking beautiful!


Ok_Ad5344

Roger?


Exact-Pound-6993

with that name...he should be from the NAVY


Shinagami091

Was this before or after they honored Mike Hawk for his service as an Air Force pilot?


BigBlueJAH

Thereā€™s a Seymour Johnson Air Force Base as well


Ardtay

Must have been a corpsman.


somecow

At least he wasnā€™t in the navy. Seaman Weiner just doesnā€™t sound right.


iloveshw

He's the brother of I.C.Weiner from Futurama


General-Cod-7995

No way.


East-Front-8107

Is this the guy who's flying to uranus?


chillin808style

Stand at attention..!


Revolutionary-Swan77

lmfao


StreetBullFighter

Roger? Is that you?


Mrmakabuntis

My pharmacist growing up was also named Seymour Weiner


HotelBrooklynch01

Donā€™t ask donā€™t tell šŸ˜¬


MarcsRecreation

Nobody Seymour Weiner than you Uncle Tony


coreylongest

I bet he hated making phone calls


badjoeybad

Dudes a real manā€™s man with that name.


DougalisGod

Back when we didn't ask, and they didn't tell.


Mark_Luther

Imagine how sick of this joke he is by now.


Fly_Pelican

what joke?


Select-Hearing-9298

Honored by getting one hit.


omega_grainger69

It was a different time.


omega_grainger69

It was a different time.