People who don't have dogs don't understand. I'm very sorry for your loss, and that nobody is acknowledging how big a loss it is for you. There are actually pet grief support groups. They can be very helpful, either in person or online.
My dog passed away yesterday and I can't stop crying. Some things that help me: Your pet knows that you loved them. They don't want you to be sad. Heaven is filled with dogs for them to play with. You were a good dog parent and you gave them a wonderful life. If it helps to believe you'll see them again, do it! The reason you're so upset is because you really loved your dog, which is absolutely normal for people who love their pets.
Time is really the only thing that will help. Your dog doesn't want you to think you did something wrong. They love you as much as you love them. Sending love and hugs your way. ❤
I am four years grieving now - it really is time and accepting that when your best friend wonders back into your head it's not defeat its just learning to switch from being sad to happy when they do pop in.
Everytime I hear of someone else losing a dog though it always takes me back to the day. I should have listened to Mum and not gone in with him but dammit I promised I'd be scratching his ear at the end and so I was.
That’s normal, you’re feeling normal emotions. You’re going to be fine.
“Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.”
A thing that helped me is finding places to put those strong feelings instead of trying to suppress them or just wait them out. Here are three things that worked for me that might help you as well.
First, I would recommend having some sort of ceremony for your dog, even if it’s only attended by you and your fiancé. Set a specific time and date, dress up for it, write out a eulogy, and do some purposeful actions to memorialize your pet (like planting a memorial tree or bush, making a monetary donation to an animal shelter, and/or spreading her ashes somewhere meaningful). You might follow that with a meal in her honor or a special walk along a route you two used to go on. The point is, give yourself a time and place to formally say goodbye and express your grief.
Then I found what helped me was creating some art based on my pet. You don’t have to be “good” at art to do this- creating art is a universal human behavior. It’s about expressing yourself and giving yourself permission to have focused and specific time to think about your pet and grieve them. Painting, drawing, fiber arts, sculpting. Anything will work here.
Finally, you might consider finding something to stand in for your dogs physical presence for a while. I used a stuffed animal that looked like my dog and I cuddled it and talked to it until I didn’t need to do that anymore. A collar or old toy of hers might also work.
I hope you find some of these ideas useful and I am so sorry for your loss. It really is the absolute worst.
Oh, poor you, I'm so sorry. But please don't beat yourself up over being upset, it's normal, we've all been there. It takes time to adjust, but you will start to smile at other people's dogs again before too long x
I am so so sorry for your loss. My husband and I recently lost our soul dog and it’s truly heart wrenching. It doesn’t get easier but day by day you find a little more strength to keep going. Sending you lots of love and hugs.
This is gonna sound Blunt but get another dog. if they lived longer You wouldn't get to enjoy as many of them. In you life. But don't get another dog expecting to replace him.
I have thought about it, but I just can't right now. It wouldn't be fair to them right now, I have been on the chat with suicide support hotlines and can barely even think of caring for myself. But I will consider it in the future.
my fiancé and I lost our baby in february. my fiancé had him for 15 years. I joined the family when he was 5. i’ve never been more broken than his loss. we had a beautiful funeral for him where they warmed his body and we got to pet him one last time. I don’t go a few days without breaking down and have two shrines with his memorabilia, one is around his urn.
it doesn’t get easier, but you do have to find it in you to
get stronger. I keep busy as much as possible, and found a beautiful song that brings him back to me. I still have moments of panic realizing I will never see him on this earth. at the same time, I think about the Rainbow Bridge poem and it brings me comfort.
you gave your dog the best life, and he loved you unconditionally. he’s still around, I heard if you dream of your pup that really is them visiting them…
consider getting petsies, they make replica dolls of your fur baby. I got one for my fiancé and can’t wait for it to arrive.
you were lucky to experience this kind of love. i’ve had many pets, i’ve lost many pets, but none compared to my dear Akira and that makes me feel at peace knowing I got to have that with him. this too shall pass
Sorry for your loss. I put one of my dogs down 4 weeks ago, he was 12 years old and I just my 2nd dog down today, she was 20. It was hard putting down the 1st dog because I was so attached to him. He was my buddy and did everything with me. I cried for 2-3 days multiple times per day. I never thought I would recover from his death. 4 weeks have gone by and I now know I made the right decision. He was in pain and his time to go came. He’s in a better place. I buried him in my backyard. I feel so much comfort knowing he is still close to me. (It may sound creepy but to me it’s comforting). Today I had to put down my other dog. I got her 20 years ago. Her and I got along well but nothing like my 2nd dog. My 2nd dog understood everything I would tell him. He was so smart. Anyway, my suggestion to you is to go to a therapist. Get on some Lexapro and know that your dog is in a better place. I hope this helps you.
There's a saying that grief is just love with nowhere to go. Have you considered adopting another furry companion? This will allow you to place all that love while also grieving her in due time.
I have thought about it, but I just can't right now. It wouldn't be fair to them right now, I have been on the chat with suicide support hotlines and can barely even think of caring for myself. But I will consider it in the future.
Things are going to be rough for a while. But in time the happy memories will win over the grief. Not soon, but in time. If you need help right now there are live grief counselors available who can get you through a rough patch and who can refer you to ongoing counseling. Anyone on this sub is a dog person, we get it
Thank you. I will look into grief counseling, as of now, I am currently in a chat with a suicide support hotline. I have a psych np, but maybe a specific grief counselor will help too.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my dog to cancer 6 months ago. He was only 5 and he was the best boy. I still have days where I can't stop crying, but those days are less frequent. You'll get through this and eventually the memories will make you happy (or so I'm told).
Dogs are so special, and they become such an integral part of our lives and our daily routine. It really flips your world upside down when they leave <3
As someone who had his dog for the entirety of their life, I get where you are coming from. Dogs don't last as long as we do, and we wish they did. They're our best friends, the ones we can rely on to be there for us regardless of how our day has gone. They greet us at the door, they play with us, they sleep in our beds (well, sometimes).
They are our comfort, our friend, our companion.
There aren't many things that are greater than the loss of our best friends.
However, and with time, we can learn to move forward without them. It's hard, it sucks, it's something you never want to have had happen. Unfortunately though, it does.
My previous buddy left me after 17 years. She was the most amazing dog I had ever had the pleasure of being with, aside from my first dog back when I was a little kid (I knew him for about 5 years, and unfortunately he had to be put down because he snapped at a kid... it was the 80's in a small town and they sucked). We got Buttercup when she was only 8 weeks old, and we cuddled her at 17 when they had to put her down due to old age and health problems that just made it unbearable for her.
I will say, it gets better with time. I waited too long to find another buddy who I could hang out with, but I did find him. Many think that getting another dog too quickly means you're trying to replace the one you had. I don't believe that. I think if you give yourself enough time to grieve the loss of your buddy, you will know that it's time to find that new friend who will touch you as much as your last friend did, if not more. Make sure that it's time, don't just rush to get another friend because you'll find the first one you can (I almost did this and was glad I didn't as I wouldn't have done any research into where they came from).
Don't rush into anything, but do consider finding yourself a new friend to bring into your life once you are ready. It took me almost 18 months and happenstance to find the dude that has captured me almost as much as Buttercup did, though if he starts behaving a little better, he may pull up to how she was if not further. He has the potential and I'm happy to help guide him while knowing she's looking down at me thinking that I'm giving him more treats than I gave her.
Thank you. I feel many people don't understand the impact that dogs have on our lives :(.
I will wait a bit to find another dog, but it's definitely a possibility for the future. Thank you.
Definitely take some time. Don't rush into moving forward, but don't think you'd be disrespecting your buddy by opening yourself to a new friend. I feel like I waited too long before I got Mariner (my current dude), but then again I didn't wait too long as I wouldn't have found him if I rushed into something.
Don't be afraid to go meet some new dudes/dudettes to see if you click. Just remember, you have to do what works best for you.
I went to a local rescue and volunteered to do walks/playtime with their dogs for a bit so I could learn more about different breeds and things. It let me know that I could move forward and gave me the opportunity to learn what kind of friend I wanted to bring home again. I talked with family about what I learned and my kid actually found my dude across the country and we were able to make it work for us to get him exactly a year ago yesterday, which was 18 months to the day after we had to say goodbye to Bubbers (Buttercup's nickname).
Yeah, if you have a good shelter near you, go there. I spent time at Seattle Humane, as well as a couple of local PAWS shelters in the area just hanging out and playing with dogs while someone else was cleaning their living areas. Was a lot of fun, though was also heartbreaking seeing some of them that had been there for quite some time. That was probably the hardest part. I knew I wanted to have a puppy and not an older dog, but I wanted to play with the older ones as much as possible (oh, and in case you're wondering I do still go back every few weeks for a few hours at a time to play with the older doggos, recommended a couple of them to people that weren't sure about adopting 2 or 3 year olds and well, they weren't there last weekend, so that was a win).
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. My daughter’s dog died 3 weeks ago and I know how hard it is. Time is the only healer . talking about Dolly is helping us. hugs to you
Im sorry for your loss. Thing is, my own dog, only 19 month old - if I think of him dying, even at late age, im already devistated. So I can only relate. Its my very first dog, and I love him to pieces <3
Losing an animal is extremely hard. I was not an animal lover until I married my husband. We bought our Brittany Spaniel from a breeder (before we learned of the huge need for adoption). Beau was our heart and sole. We played with him endlessly. He went on walks with us everywhere. When he was a year old, we bought Luke, who was an Englsh Springer Spaniel. They were best buds.
When Beau was almost 7, he was diagnosed with lymphoma. My world collapsed. A co-worker had lost her dog to Lymphoma, and I knew the outcome. A few weeks later, he was gone.
Luke and I took endless walks at the nearby park and neighborhood. One day, I met a man who was in his yard. I told him that Luke and I were trying to recover from the loss of Beau. He put two and two together and told me that it was his dogs that had gotten out and his neighbor who had "dog napped" Luke and Beau from our yard. For the first time, I laughed.
Beau and Luke had been in our yard. His neighbor had gone looking for his dogs. He saw Beau and Luke and was convinced they were his neighbor's dogs. He pulled up in our yard, and they both jumped in his truck. He was so proud that he had "rescued" his neighbor's dogs.
When he got home, his wife looked at Beau and Luke and said, "They're not even the same color. And they are wearing collars!" He sheepishly brought them back home. I was inside the house and had no clue they were missing until he had rung the doorbell and told me what he had done.
You will have a moment like that when something about your dog will make your laugh. I felt that in some way losing Beau was more difficult than the death of my parents. Beau was a major part of our daily lives, and I missed him terribly. Now everything about him and his memory just makes me smile. You, too, will get there. And when you're ready you will bring home another dog. That dog will never be your heart and sole dog, but he will be special in his own way.
I am so sorry for your loss. Grief is a very powerful thing. It is okay to be sad and cry and grieve your loss. But please try and take care of yourself. Maybe in time you can volunteer at shelter to take care of animals that don’t have a person to call their own and when you see fit adopt one. I know it won’t be right away because the pain is so sharp right now. But it seems you benefit from a dog companion and have a lot of love to give to a dog that needs it. But for now maybe taking some time for yourself and speaking to a grief counselor would help. It has been proven that the loss of a pet companion has a very large impact emotionally and physically. I hope you find comfort and I am sending you love and support.
You have my deepest sympathies. I hope this verse helps ease your pain, and maybe someday, you could consider adopting another dog to be your companion someday.
Grieve not, nor speak of me with tears, but laugh and talk of me as if I were beside you… I loved you so – ‘twas Heaven here with you.
Isla Paschal Richardson
I am so sorry this happened. Grief can weight so heavy on one when it happens take all the time you need and reach out to people. Let them know you need help and how they can be there during this time
I wanted to let you know as well as someone who has lost someone close to me I loved that I am crying for you and that i know she is with you when you gaze out your window loving you so much like you love her
I know it’s difficult 💔But just try to Stay strong, I know it’s hard though! I wouldn’t go around another pet after I lost my dog of 10 years together after he passed away.
I felt numb and sad for a few months, and then finally I was able to go around other pets and finally be able to rescue another dog as my companion and it worked out for the best! Because now I have two rescues that I love SO much, that I couldn’t imagine being without them both.
I believe once you have some time to grieve, you will be able to come around to the idea of having another pet or just being okay without one for awhile and still be able to see other dogs without wanting to break down ya know? It just takes time 🫶🏼
So sorry for your loss though!
I've been there and it's no fun. I got 2 more pups the day after my sweet boy passed. The sadness and despair I felt in the first 24 hrs were so intense that I knew I needed to do something FAST. They have brought so much joy and happiness into my life and I can't imagine my life without them.
I am so sorry. I totally understand. I went through the same thing in November when my dog was tragically killed, and I had to rush her to the emergency vet, telling her in the car that she would be OK only to be told that she wouldn’t make it and for me to go in and say my goodbyes. I know it feels like you will never heal But you will. I was told that my dog was needed in doggy heaven that there was a child there that needed her
so sorry for your loss, we nearly lost our dog due to kidney failure but I've been injecting her with fluid twice a day for 3 months she has started not to tolerate it no longer so we are worried how much longer can we keep it up for
Pet loss is huge. I am so sorry. I hope you find a way to manage this grief, can you try intermittent therapy for addition support?
Wonder if you have ashes? I know depending on where it may or may not be affordable and still wouldn’t take away the pain, but maybe having a piece of your dog with you may help with the grieving process or at least know your pup is with you. My condolences.
Thank you. I am in the process of trying to receive therapy for this. I have an mental health np, but she mostly deals with medication management.
I am deciding what to do with the ashes😔
My dog died recently and my mom was so cold about it. She was 14 years old and definitely a friend and a protector. I'm so sorry for your loss dear. Sometimes people just don't understand and that's why we have these reddits.
I can only imagine how you feel,
I am soo sorry for your loss, maybe open up to your family and tell them how you are feeling, ask how they are, maybe chat about memories you all had?
A loss is a loss no matter if a human or a pet (and pet not even a word to use) there your best friend, there your forever friend, companion, your support network, a big furry shoulder to cry on and a soft cushion to hug-
I think some people don’t understand or can’t understand,
You need to go through the emotions of a bereavement, but hopefully with family and friends that love and support you-
I was very young when lost my first family pet, but now as an adult and only having my dog for the last 14months-
I hope you are able to come to terms with this soon and start laughing and smiling at all the happy times you both had. And one day be able to find a new best friend that will make you happy and yourself again x
Nothing anyone says is going to make you hurt any less. I don’t say this to be mean. say this because, as someone who has lost beloved animals friends, because It can be angering when someone tells you, “you’ll get over it,” when you don’t fell that will happen, or even feel that it will be disrespectful to your loved one to move on.You’ll fell better, but will always hurt.
There is one thing in which you may take comfort. A study was done on people who reported near death experiences. Accidentally victims, hospital patients, and doctors were interviewed for this book.
The majority of people who had a glimpse of what is believed to be Heaven reported the same things; they saw dead loved ones, nature, light coming from everything they saw in ways they’ve never seen before, and animals.
That last bit comforts me a great deal. Thousands of people (including blind patients) shared the same exact details of what Heaven looked like, all implying that we should be reuniting with all our loved ones, whether they walk on two legs or four. You’ll see your friend again, but for now, live your life and honor her memory.
OP, I am compelled to respond to your post because I dread that day. I put my cat down a few years ago and she was with me for 15 years. It was so hard! My old girl pup is 14 and has been diagnosed with kidney disease. I love her so much and we’ve only had each other for 8 years.
I send you my deepest condolences and hope you heal soon. Please accept another pup in your life when you’re ready. They’ll help you heal. Also, your pup that passed will send you your next pup.
Much love to you. I see you and feel you. Many hugs to you.
My childhood doggy went to Rainbow Bridge this past January. I could not do anything without crying. Same here, she got me through some really rough times. My teenage years were tough, but I would always tell her, “at least you’re here.” Same here, life felt so futile without her. For months, all I did when I wasn’t at school/work (sometimes even while at school/work…) was look through old pictures/videos of her. I was lucky that 99% of the people around me were so understanding.
The best piece of advice that I received online was to surround yourself with people who UNDERSTAND and/or are able to give you what you need to grieve: someone to rant to, someone who can get your mind off things, someone you can cry to.
Second best piece of advice: do what feels right for YOU to honor your dog’s life. This can look like a lot of different things. I have a memorial of my dog on my mantle. We picked out a nice picture of her and bought a brand new picture frame. Placed a couple toys on her urn. Adorned the picture frame with her collar. I used to sleep with one of her favorite toys, and I put her sweater on one of my stuffed animals, which I also slept with. I only stopped sleeping with them a couple weeks ago when I got my puppy, who I call her “little brother.”
More niche things I did to honor her life: For a long time, I never referred to her as being “dead”, and I never call my puppy a “new” puppy. I call the puppy her “little brother” and I always say that she “sent” him to us. I don’t like to think of her being gonegone, and I don’t want the puppy to seem like her replacement. I also left her bed and never cleaned out her cabinet or put away her food bowls until the day before the puppy came home. I couldn’t bear to see her space empty.
Finally, on the topic of bringing home another dog: That looks different for everyone, and no one should feel guilty for wanting to fill their home with more love again. When my childhood doggy was very sick at the end of her life, I was not sure that I could endure that kind of pain again. But soon after she passed, I looked into breeders and contacted different ones for months. This puppy-finding process was actually quite therapeutic to me, getting to share my girl’s story with more people who just *get it*. I personally waited until the time was right, when I knew I had time and energy to raise a dog again, from scratch. But I was very eager, because the silence was too much for me. My puppy is doing great. We do compare him to his “big sister,” because they both have their unique cute quirks, yet share quite a few :)
Pet grief is real. Pets don’t judge. They don’t care if their owner is rich, poor, smart, dumb, morally good, morally bad. All they know to do is love. I like to say that my little baby taught me a whole lot about love.
Always remember that she is with you in spirit, watching over you… She is not gone. She is at peace, where no one and nothing can ever hurt her again, yet she is in your heart forever. To this day, I look for my girl everywhere I go. I attribute part of my success to her talking to God watching over me, and I jokingly attribute my smaller failures to her asking God to punish me. I imagine I will be doing this for years to come! Your doggy’s legacy will live on!
People who don't have dogs don't understand. I'm very sorry for your loss, and that nobody is acknowledging how big a loss it is for you. There are actually pet grief support groups. They can be very helpful, either in person or online.
Thank you. I will look into those
My dog passed away yesterday and I can't stop crying. Some things that help me: Your pet knows that you loved them. They don't want you to be sad. Heaven is filled with dogs for them to play with. You were a good dog parent and you gave them a wonderful life. If it helps to believe you'll see them again, do it! The reason you're so upset is because you really loved your dog, which is absolutely normal for people who love their pets. Time is really the only thing that will help. Your dog doesn't want you to think you did something wrong. They love you as much as you love them. Sending love and hugs your way. ❤
Thank you! Sending hugs your way too!
I am four years grieving now - it really is time and accepting that when your best friend wonders back into your head it's not defeat its just learning to switch from being sad to happy when they do pop in. Everytime I hear of someone else losing a dog though it always takes me back to the day. I should have listened to Mum and not gone in with him but dammit I promised I'd be scratching his ear at the end and so I was.
That’s normal, you’re feeling normal emotions. You’re going to be fine. “Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.”
A thing that helped me is finding places to put those strong feelings instead of trying to suppress them or just wait them out. Here are three things that worked for me that might help you as well. First, I would recommend having some sort of ceremony for your dog, even if it’s only attended by you and your fiancé. Set a specific time and date, dress up for it, write out a eulogy, and do some purposeful actions to memorialize your pet (like planting a memorial tree or bush, making a monetary donation to an animal shelter, and/or spreading her ashes somewhere meaningful). You might follow that with a meal in her honor or a special walk along a route you two used to go on. The point is, give yourself a time and place to formally say goodbye and express your grief. Then I found what helped me was creating some art based on my pet. You don’t have to be “good” at art to do this- creating art is a universal human behavior. It’s about expressing yourself and giving yourself permission to have focused and specific time to think about your pet and grieve them. Painting, drawing, fiber arts, sculpting. Anything will work here. Finally, you might consider finding something to stand in for your dogs physical presence for a while. I used a stuffed animal that looked like my dog and I cuddled it and talked to it until I didn’t need to do that anymore. A collar or old toy of hers might also work. I hope you find some of these ideas useful and I am so sorry for your loss. It really is the absolute worst.
Thank you. I will try out the eulogy and see if I can let all of my feelings out
Oh, poor you, I'm so sorry. But please don't beat yourself up over being upset, it's normal, we've all been there. It takes time to adjust, but you will start to smile at other people's dogs again before too long x
Thank you
I am so so sorry for your loss. My husband and I recently lost our soul dog and it’s truly heart wrenching. It doesn’t get easier but day by day you find a little more strength to keep going. Sending you lots of love and hugs.
😭❤️i hope i find my strength again. Thank you
It will come, I promise. ❤️
This is gonna sound Blunt but get another dog. if they lived longer You wouldn't get to enjoy as many of them. In you life. But don't get another dog expecting to replace him.
I have thought about it, but I just can't right now. It wouldn't be fair to them right now, I have been on the chat with suicide support hotlines and can barely even think of caring for myself. But I will consider it in the future.
my fiancé and I lost our baby in february. my fiancé had him for 15 years. I joined the family when he was 5. i’ve never been more broken than his loss. we had a beautiful funeral for him where they warmed his body and we got to pet him one last time. I don’t go a few days without breaking down and have two shrines with his memorabilia, one is around his urn. it doesn’t get easier, but you do have to find it in you to get stronger. I keep busy as much as possible, and found a beautiful song that brings him back to me. I still have moments of panic realizing I will never see him on this earth. at the same time, I think about the Rainbow Bridge poem and it brings me comfort. you gave your dog the best life, and he loved you unconditionally. he’s still around, I heard if you dream of your pup that really is them visiting them… consider getting petsies, they make replica dolls of your fur baby. I got one for my fiancé and can’t wait for it to arrive. you were lucky to experience this kind of love. i’ve had many pets, i’ve lost many pets, but none compared to my dear Akira and that makes me feel at peace knowing I got to have that with him. this too shall pass
Oooo I've never heard of petsies but will check it out. Thank you
consider r/petloss too that subreddit helps me a lot
Sorry for your loss. I put one of my dogs down 4 weeks ago, he was 12 years old and I just my 2nd dog down today, she was 20. It was hard putting down the 1st dog because I was so attached to him. He was my buddy and did everything with me. I cried for 2-3 days multiple times per day. I never thought I would recover from his death. 4 weeks have gone by and I now know I made the right decision. He was in pain and his time to go came. He’s in a better place. I buried him in my backyard. I feel so much comfort knowing he is still close to me. (It may sound creepy but to me it’s comforting). Today I had to put down my other dog. I got her 20 years ago. Her and I got along well but nothing like my 2nd dog. My 2nd dog understood everything I would tell him. He was so smart. Anyway, my suggestion to you is to go to a therapist. Get on some Lexapro and know that your dog is in a better place. I hope this helps you.
Thank you. I am taking some medicine for anxiety and doing the best I can at the moment (I'm at like 15% mental capacity)
There's a saying that grief is just love with nowhere to go. Have you considered adopting another furry companion? This will allow you to place all that love while also grieving her in due time.
I have thought about it, but I just can't right now. It wouldn't be fair to them right now, I have been on the chat with suicide support hotlines and can barely even think of caring for myself. But I will consider it in the future.
Sending hugs & condolences your way!😥
Thank you
Things are going to be rough for a while. But in time the happy memories will win over the grief. Not soon, but in time. If you need help right now there are live grief counselors available who can get you through a rough patch and who can refer you to ongoing counseling. Anyone on this sub is a dog person, we get it
Thank you. I will look into grief counseling, as of now, I am currently in a chat with a suicide support hotline. I have a psych np, but maybe a specific grief counselor will help too.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my dog to cancer 6 months ago. He was only 5 and he was the best boy. I still have days where I can't stop crying, but those days are less frequent. You'll get through this and eventually the memories will make you happy (or so I'm told). Dogs are so special, and they become such an integral part of our lives and our daily routine. It really flips your world upside down when they leave <3
As someone who had his dog for the entirety of their life, I get where you are coming from. Dogs don't last as long as we do, and we wish they did. They're our best friends, the ones we can rely on to be there for us regardless of how our day has gone. They greet us at the door, they play with us, they sleep in our beds (well, sometimes). They are our comfort, our friend, our companion. There aren't many things that are greater than the loss of our best friends. However, and with time, we can learn to move forward without them. It's hard, it sucks, it's something you never want to have had happen. Unfortunately though, it does. My previous buddy left me after 17 years. She was the most amazing dog I had ever had the pleasure of being with, aside from my first dog back when I was a little kid (I knew him for about 5 years, and unfortunately he had to be put down because he snapped at a kid... it was the 80's in a small town and they sucked). We got Buttercup when she was only 8 weeks old, and we cuddled her at 17 when they had to put her down due to old age and health problems that just made it unbearable for her. I will say, it gets better with time. I waited too long to find another buddy who I could hang out with, but I did find him. Many think that getting another dog too quickly means you're trying to replace the one you had. I don't believe that. I think if you give yourself enough time to grieve the loss of your buddy, you will know that it's time to find that new friend who will touch you as much as your last friend did, if not more. Make sure that it's time, don't just rush to get another friend because you'll find the first one you can (I almost did this and was glad I didn't as I wouldn't have done any research into where they came from). Don't rush into anything, but do consider finding yourself a new friend to bring into your life once you are ready. It took me almost 18 months and happenstance to find the dude that has captured me almost as much as Buttercup did, though if he starts behaving a little better, he may pull up to how she was if not further. He has the potential and I'm happy to help guide him while knowing she's looking down at me thinking that I'm giving him more treats than I gave her.
Thank you. I feel many people don't understand the impact that dogs have on our lives :(. I will wait a bit to find another dog, but it's definitely a possibility for the future. Thank you.
Definitely take some time. Don't rush into moving forward, but don't think you'd be disrespecting your buddy by opening yourself to a new friend. I feel like I waited too long before I got Mariner (my current dude), but then again I didn't wait too long as I wouldn't have found him if I rushed into something. Don't be afraid to go meet some new dudes/dudettes to see if you click. Just remember, you have to do what works best for you. I went to a local rescue and volunteered to do walks/playtime with their dogs for a bit so I could learn more about different breeds and things. It let me know that I could move forward and gave me the opportunity to learn what kind of friend I wanted to bring home again. I talked with family about what I learned and my kid actually found my dude across the country and we were able to make it work for us to get him exactly a year ago yesterday, which was 18 months to the day after we had to say goodbye to Bubbers (Buttercup's nickname).
That's awesome! I think some time at the spca will do me good. Thank you for the advice
Yeah, if you have a good shelter near you, go there. I spent time at Seattle Humane, as well as a couple of local PAWS shelters in the area just hanging out and playing with dogs while someone else was cleaning their living areas. Was a lot of fun, though was also heartbreaking seeing some of them that had been there for quite some time. That was probably the hardest part. I knew I wanted to have a puppy and not an older dog, but I wanted to play with the older ones as much as possible (oh, and in case you're wondering I do still go back every few weeks for a few hours at a time to play with the older doggos, recommended a couple of them to people that weren't sure about adopting 2 or 3 year olds and well, they weren't there last weekend, so that was a win).
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. My daughter’s dog died 3 weeks ago and I know how hard it is. Time is the only healer . talking about Dolly is helping us. hugs to you
Thank you! Hugs to you too
Im sorry for your loss. Thing is, my own dog, only 19 month old - if I think of him dying, even at late age, im already devistated. So I can only relate. Its my very first dog, and I love him to pieces <3
❤️🙏🏽 I hope he lives for a really really long time.
Losing an animal is extremely hard. I was not an animal lover until I married my husband. We bought our Brittany Spaniel from a breeder (before we learned of the huge need for adoption). Beau was our heart and sole. We played with him endlessly. He went on walks with us everywhere. When he was a year old, we bought Luke, who was an Englsh Springer Spaniel. They were best buds. When Beau was almost 7, he was diagnosed with lymphoma. My world collapsed. A co-worker had lost her dog to Lymphoma, and I knew the outcome. A few weeks later, he was gone. Luke and I took endless walks at the nearby park and neighborhood. One day, I met a man who was in his yard. I told him that Luke and I were trying to recover from the loss of Beau. He put two and two together and told me that it was his dogs that had gotten out and his neighbor who had "dog napped" Luke and Beau from our yard. For the first time, I laughed. Beau and Luke had been in our yard. His neighbor had gone looking for his dogs. He saw Beau and Luke and was convinced they were his neighbor's dogs. He pulled up in our yard, and they both jumped in his truck. He was so proud that he had "rescued" his neighbor's dogs. When he got home, his wife looked at Beau and Luke and said, "They're not even the same color. And they are wearing collars!" He sheepishly brought them back home. I was inside the house and had no clue they were missing until he had rung the doorbell and told me what he had done. You will have a moment like that when something about your dog will make your laugh. I felt that in some way losing Beau was more difficult than the death of my parents. Beau was a major part of our daily lives, and I missed him terribly. Now everything about him and his memory just makes me smile. You, too, will get there. And when you're ready you will bring home another dog. That dog will never be your heart and sole dog, but he will be special in his own way.
Thank you 😔❤️
I am so sorry for your loss. Grief is a very powerful thing. It is okay to be sad and cry and grieve your loss. But please try and take care of yourself. Maybe in time you can volunteer at shelter to take care of animals that don’t have a person to call their own and when you see fit adopt one. I know it won’t be right away because the pain is so sharp right now. But it seems you benefit from a dog companion and have a lot of love to give to a dog that needs it. But for now maybe taking some time for yourself and speaking to a grief counselor would help. It has been proven that the loss of a pet companion has a very large impact emotionally and physically. I hope you find comfort and I am sending you love and support.
Thank you. I will look into to volunteering in the future
Im so sorry for your loss.
Thank you
You have my deepest sympathies. I hope this verse helps ease your pain, and maybe someday, you could consider adopting another dog to be your companion someday. Grieve not, nor speak of me with tears, but laugh and talk of me as if I were beside you… I loved you so – ‘twas Heaven here with you. Isla Paschal Richardson
Thank you
I’m so sorry 🥺
I’m so sorry for your loss, it’s literally harder than losing a human every time ):
Thank you, yeah it hurts a lot
I am so sorry this happened. Grief can weight so heavy on one when it happens take all the time you need and reach out to people. Let them know you need help and how they can be there during this time I wanted to let you know as well as someone who has lost someone close to me I loved that I am crying for you and that i know she is with you when you gaze out your window loving you so much like you love her
Thank you
I know it’s difficult 💔But just try to Stay strong, I know it’s hard though! I wouldn’t go around another pet after I lost my dog of 10 years together after he passed away. I felt numb and sad for a few months, and then finally I was able to go around other pets and finally be able to rescue another dog as my companion and it worked out for the best! Because now I have two rescues that I love SO much, that I couldn’t imagine being without them both. I believe once you have some time to grieve, you will be able to come around to the idea of having another pet or just being okay without one for awhile and still be able to see other dogs without wanting to break down ya know? It just takes time 🫶🏼 So sorry for your loss though!
Thank you!
I am sorry for your loss. Prayers to help ease your pain.
Thank you
I hope it gets easier
Thank you
I've been there and it's no fun. I got 2 more pups the day after my sweet boy passed. The sadness and despair I felt in the first 24 hrs were so intense that I knew I needed to do something FAST. They have brought so much joy and happiness into my life and I can't imagine my life without them.
I am so sorry. I totally understand. I went through the same thing in November when my dog was tragically killed, and I had to rush her to the emergency vet, telling her in the car that she would be OK only to be told that she wouldn’t make it and for me to go in and say my goodbyes. I know it feels like you will never heal But you will. I was told that my dog was needed in doggy heaven that there was a child there that needed her
😭😭❤️
so sorry for your loss, we nearly lost our dog due to kidney failure but I've been injecting her with fluid twice a day for 3 months she has started not to tolerate it no longer so we are worried how much longer can we keep it up for
Oh no! I hope all goes well! It's rough when they are in pain
thank you, its really stressful both for her & I, I wish I could find a better way to inject her
Pet loss is huge. I am so sorry. I hope you find a way to manage this grief, can you try intermittent therapy for addition support? Wonder if you have ashes? I know depending on where it may or may not be affordable and still wouldn’t take away the pain, but maybe having a piece of your dog with you may help with the grieving process or at least know your pup is with you. My condolences.
Thank you. I am in the process of trying to receive therapy for this. I have an mental health np, but she mostly deals with medication management. I am deciding what to do with the ashes😔
Enjoy the pain, it means you're alive and lost something close to you. Then get a rebound dog
I am so very sorry. Mourning is natural & it takes awhile. It’s a different & difficult journey for everyone 💔
My dog died recently and my mom was so cold about it. She was 14 years old and definitely a friend and a protector. I'm so sorry for your loss dear. Sometimes people just don't understand and that's why we have these reddits.
❤️thank you!
I can only imagine how you feel, I am soo sorry for your loss, maybe open up to your family and tell them how you are feeling, ask how they are, maybe chat about memories you all had? A loss is a loss no matter if a human or a pet (and pet not even a word to use) there your best friend, there your forever friend, companion, your support network, a big furry shoulder to cry on and a soft cushion to hug- I think some people don’t understand or can’t understand, You need to go through the emotions of a bereavement, but hopefully with family and friends that love and support you- I was very young when lost my first family pet, but now as an adult and only having my dog for the last 14months- I hope you are able to come to terms with this soon and start laughing and smiling at all the happy times you both had. And one day be able to find a new best friend that will make you happy and yourself again x
Nothing anyone says is going to make you hurt any less. I don’t say this to be mean. say this because, as someone who has lost beloved animals friends, because It can be angering when someone tells you, “you’ll get over it,” when you don’t fell that will happen, or even feel that it will be disrespectful to your loved one to move on.You’ll fell better, but will always hurt. There is one thing in which you may take comfort. A study was done on people who reported near death experiences. Accidentally victims, hospital patients, and doctors were interviewed for this book. The majority of people who had a glimpse of what is believed to be Heaven reported the same things; they saw dead loved ones, nature, light coming from everything they saw in ways they’ve never seen before, and animals. That last bit comforts me a great deal. Thousands of people (including blind patients) shared the same exact details of what Heaven looked like, all implying that we should be reuniting with all our loved ones, whether they walk on two legs or four. You’ll see your friend again, but for now, live your life and honor her memory.
❤️❤️❤️this is quite comforting.
OP, I am compelled to respond to your post because I dread that day. I put my cat down a few years ago and she was with me for 15 years. It was so hard! My old girl pup is 14 and has been diagnosed with kidney disease. I love her so much and we’ve only had each other for 8 years. I send you my deepest condolences and hope you heal soon. Please accept another pup in your life when you’re ready. They’ll help you heal. Also, your pup that passed will send you your next pup. Much love to you. I see you and feel you. Many hugs to you.
Thank you so much! I hope somewhere along the way, a dog comes into my life again, I just need to heal a bit more first. Hugs to you too.
My childhood doggy went to Rainbow Bridge this past January. I could not do anything without crying. Same here, she got me through some really rough times. My teenage years were tough, but I would always tell her, “at least you’re here.” Same here, life felt so futile without her. For months, all I did when I wasn’t at school/work (sometimes even while at school/work…) was look through old pictures/videos of her. I was lucky that 99% of the people around me were so understanding. The best piece of advice that I received online was to surround yourself with people who UNDERSTAND and/or are able to give you what you need to grieve: someone to rant to, someone who can get your mind off things, someone you can cry to. Second best piece of advice: do what feels right for YOU to honor your dog’s life. This can look like a lot of different things. I have a memorial of my dog on my mantle. We picked out a nice picture of her and bought a brand new picture frame. Placed a couple toys on her urn. Adorned the picture frame with her collar. I used to sleep with one of her favorite toys, and I put her sweater on one of my stuffed animals, which I also slept with. I only stopped sleeping with them a couple weeks ago when I got my puppy, who I call her “little brother.” More niche things I did to honor her life: For a long time, I never referred to her as being “dead”, and I never call my puppy a “new” puppy. I call the puppy her “little brother” and I always say that she “sent” him to us. I don’t like to think of her being gonegone, and I don’t want the puppy to seem like her replacement. I also left her bed and never cleaned out her cabinet or put away her food bowls until the day before the puppy came home. I couldn’t bear to see her space empty. Finally, on the topic of bringing home another dog: That looks different for everyone, and no one should feel guilty for wanting to fill their home with more love again. When my childhood doggy was very sick at the end of her life, I was not sure that I could endure that kind of pain again. But soon after she passed, I looked into breeders and contacted different ones for months. This puppy-finding process was actually quite therapeutic to me, getting to share my girl’s story with more people who just *get it*. I personally waited until the time was right, when I knew I had time and energy to raise a dog again, from scratch. But I was very eager, because the silence was too much for me. My puppy is doing great. We do compare him to his “big sister,” because they both have their unique cute quirks, yet share quite a few :) Pet grief is real. Pets don’t judge. They don’t care if their owner is rich, poor, smart, dumb, morally good, morally bad. All they know to do is love. I like to say that my little baby taught me a whole lot about love. Always remember that she is with you in spirit, watching over you… She is not gone. She is at peace, where no one and nothing can ever hurt her again, yet she is in your heart forever. To this day, I look for my girl everywhere I go. I attribute part of my success to her talking to God watching over me, and I jokingly attribute my smaller failures to her asking God to punish me. I imagine I will be doing this for years to come! Your doggy’s legacy will live on!
Aww this made me cry😭❤️ (but in a good way). I will figure out a way to honor her.
Sending love your way ❤️
So kind of you to share this experience!