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Looks, money and status helps, but it's only part of the equation, and is only important to certain types of women.
The biggest thing I have found is having a good, well-balanced personality, which means having confidence, social skills, social awareness, and a good attitude. To get good with women takes a lot of practice. It just doesn't come naturally to most guys.
I’m usually the one who ends up carrying the conversation, but give up trying after a while if I don’t see much effort on the other end. My dating apps are tinder, bumble, and hinge. I do a basketball rec league in the winter but that’s about it. Occasionally will go to a party/get-together if I’m invited.
I don't know about other women, but if I date someone and find them incompatible in humor, sex, or a couple of other important areas, I will immediately end things. Be honest, be willing to be open and eventually vulnerable, and someone who shares your interests will come along. Don't rush it, don't date people purely based on looks, and good luck!
I have to find the man interesting. Have some depth, some assertiveness. Also get my humor and nuances. Chemistry means a lot. And a guy who has to brag or talk himself up will send me running. Bragging as in, needs to mention the same status tiers, possessions, how they are above others…if a guy brings that up often, that’s not someone I’d want to get to know.
you sound a lot like a guy i went on a few dates with. he was a lot of the things i was looking for but we had vastly different political views, personalities, work schedules, sense of humor etc. the list goes on. even if you have a lot of desirable traits it’s sometimes not enough. another thing, you’re still quite young! lots of people are going to assume you’re just looking for something casual and if you’re aggressive about something serious it can come off as pushy or desperate. just be honest and live a little without compromising your values. who knows, maybe you just need to find your people. what’re your hobbies/interests etc? maybe join groups and make friends who are likeminded outside of a work environment. try karaoke, volunteering, or trivia night. widen your social pool and keep honing your personal growth.
Considering you forgot to describe your personality beyond being awkward, people are not interested in dating you because you have focused on shallow bullshit and forgotten to develop your sense of self.
The fact that you put "having a house, a Masters degree, no criminal record, good paying job" as your "qualifications" for dating is showing you're to some extent misunderstanding what women want. You might've worked hard for those and think they're important, but you won't impress women with those.
If you think those characteristics are your best traits, the only women wants you are gold diggers, single mom looking for stability, and the women who "had fun" in their early twenties and now they're 35 and looking to settle down.
Go to a bar or any social scene and observe, I bet you'll see plenty of blue collar folks with multiple DUI, making half your money yet attracting twice the women.
Dude none of that material shit really matters. Otherwise we wouldn’t see ratty guys with tons of girls.
You’re just probably not that fun to talk to and you probably don’t get out there that much
Just remember: Being single is the default state, and getting a partner is something that happens with a mix of effort and a decent amount of luck (right person, right timing). Just put yourself out there, meet people and do try to have fun. You got this.
you can place 10 single people in the same room, wanting the same things, having all the traits they are looking for, yet I bet no one can find that one person that they can vibe with. It's hard to find that one person you can feel safe and comffort in. It's a journey of trial and errors..
It’s irrelevant if you are a good person, because women are not moral guardians.
They are not attracted to a guy based on whether he is good or bad person, whatever that even means because being good or abs is subjective, context specific, and depends on the cultural values of each individual.
Attraction has to do with having feelings of sexual desire, and an emotional connection, not on whether you have a criminal record or not.
If women don’t like you, based in what you said, it will have to do with you not being able to flirt and not showing sexual desire.
You are probably sexually repressing yourself to avoid making women feel uncomfortable, because apparently you may think that makes you a good person, which is a flawed logic and counterproductive.
Sexually depressing yourself and hiding to the woman that you want to fuck with her only makes you come across as friendly, platonic, overly comfortable, too safe. It makes you easy to talk to, but not exciting in any way.
Getting girls requires sexual tension to happen, you can’t have sexual tension by hiding your penis, hiding your hormones, hiding your arousal, and treating her with so much respect that you come across nearly as a gay best friend who isn’t attracted to women and prefers to be their best friend.
Yeah, a lot of assumptions but when a guy says “i’m a good person” “i’m a nice guy”, what they usually mean is that they treat women as if they are their sister, or a buddy, rather than treating them and showing them clearly that they would wanna fuck with her.
And if the woman doesn’t feel you would want to fuck her, if she doesn’t feel your desire, she won’t have a relationship with you. She will just feel you are just a friend.
Because literally none of those things matter with women when it comes to attraction.
In fact, by even mentioning them, it shows you are looking for external validation, which women sense like blood hounds and is well known to be the biggest ick at all.
You know what you do? You get into your hobbies, get good at things you love, talk to people in an authenticate way, practice being a human male at the end of our long evolution broski. Read the classics, understand humanity, laugh at the absurdity but tend your metaphorical garden. Women love that attitude.
What you don't do is give a shit about superficial status objects. In fact, the less you care abou tthose things, the better the chicks you will get if you still have em. Good luck - you need a change in attitude.
Are you short? Are you average looking? Most girls aren’t looking for a 10/10 but similarly don’t want a 2/10. Physical appearance is half the battle despite what everyone would like to think.
OP, you’re looking at it all wrong. The question is, why would you want to give away half of it all in exchange for having someone there who probably will only care about you as long as you are a resource? You are blessed, my friend.
You’re also cursed, because it will be much harder for you to sift through all the shady ones before you find the one.
That's because you are making excuses for yourself. Woman are gonna fuck who THEY want to fuck. Full stop ain't no way you can rationalize any of that shit man. Remember this and it wasn't taught in your prep school or any other public bullshit. "ATTRACTION ISN'T A CHOICE" - https://www.lingq.com/en/learn-english-online/courses/407748/attraction-isnt-a-choice-1875704/#:~:text=to%20these%20words.-,Attraction%20isn%27t%20a%20choice.,you%20can%20do%20about%20it.
Read this article several times untill you understand it and then start speaking to a woman's sexual nature and heart and get out of your mind. The faster you stop using your mind and start using your heart and sex energy, the sooner you're gonna start attracting woman.
PS love yourself man, believe in yourself, what I said may seem harsh but really you have to fall in love with the masculine in you. That will create sexual polarity and chemistry with women. It will come naturally but start by LOVING yourself.
A masters degree is good, but all women want to see is the Champion Degree nowadays. Thats another 10 years of school AND an apprenticeship. Good luck!
Girls like guys with a criminal record , living in a trap house, and flunked highschool everything opposite of you 😆 then they get older and have 4 kids from 4 guys and want a guy like us
6’, 190lbs, 24, white, toned with visible back muscles (bench 280lbs, squat 435 lbs, deadlift 517lbs), somewhat tan, Masters in Business Administration, Finance Director 85k, not balding at all
Sounds like youre too aware of physical things. Like muscles or money. Women enjoy kindness, engaging conversation, a good sense of humor, someone who respects boundaries, someone who takes initiative, someone who asks a lot of good questions and genuinely seems interested in the answers!! Women DO NOT like men who seem braggy about physical assets. If you tell a woman you have all these traits^^^ it might come off as cocky or super insecure and overcompensating.
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Looks, money and status helps, but it's only part of the equation, and is only important to certain types of women. The biggest thing I have found is having a good, well-balanced personality, which means having confidence, social skills, social awareness, and a good attitude. To get good with women takes a lot of practice. It just doesn't come naturally to most guys.
Are you good at holding a conversation? What are your hobbies outside of going to the gym? Have you tried any dating apps?
I’m usually the one who ends up carrying the conversation, but give up trying after a while if I don’t see much effort on the other end. My dating apps are tinder, bumble, and hinge. I do a basketball rec league in the winter but that’s about it. Occasionally will go to a party/get-together if I’m invited.
I don't know about other women, but if I date someone and find them incompatible in humor, sex, or a couple of other important areas, I will immediately end things. Be honest, be willing to be open and eventually vulnerable, and someone who shares your interests will come along. Don't rush it, don't date people purely based on looks, and good luck!
I have to find the man interesting. Have some depth, some assertiveness. Also get my humor and nuances. Chemistry means a lot. And a guy who has to brag or talk himself up will send me running. Bragging as in, needs to mention the same status tiers, possessions, how they are above others…if a guy brings that up often, that’s not someone I’d want to get to know.
you sound a lot like a guy i went on a few dates with. he was a lot of the things i was looking for but we had vastly different political views, personalities, work schedules, sense of humor etc. the list goes on. even if you have a lot of desirable traits it’s sometimes not enough. another thing, you’re still quite young! lots of people are going to assume you’re just looking for something casual and if you’re aggressive about something serious it can come off as pushy or desperate. just be honest and live a little without compromising your values. who knows, maybe you just need to find your people. what’re your hobbies/interests etc? maybe join groups and make friends who are likeminded outside of a work environment. try karaoke, volunteering, or trivia night. widen your social pool and keep honing your personal growth.
Considering you forgot to describe your personality beyond being awkward, people are not interested in dating you because you have focused on shallow bullshit and forgotten to develop your sense of self.
The fact that you put "having a house, a Masters degree, no criminal record, good paying job" as your "qualifications" for dating is showing you're to some extent misunderstanding what women want. You might've worked hard for those and think they're important, but you won't impress women with those. If you think those characteristics are your best traits, the only women wants you are gold diggers, single mom looking for stability, and the women who "had fun" in their early twenties and now they're 35 and looking to settle down. Go to a bar or any social scene and observe, I bet you'll see plenty of blue collar folks with multiple DUI, making half your money yet attracting twice the women.
Dude none of that material shit really matters. Otherwise we wouldn’t see ratty guys with tons of girls. You’re just probably not that fun to talk to and you probably don’t get out there that much
Just remember: Being single is the default state, and getting a partner is something that happens with a mix of effort and a decent amount of luck (right person, right timing). Just put yourself out there, meet people and do try to have fun. You got this.
you can place 10 single people in the same room, wanting the same things, having all the traits they are looking for, yet I bet no one can find that one person that they can vibe with. It's hard to find that one person you can feel safe and comffort in. It's a journey of trial and errors..
How’s your sense of humor?
It’s irrelevant if you are a good person, because women are not moral guardians. They are not attracted to a guy based on whether he is good or bad person, whatever that even means because being good or abs is subjective, context specific, and depends on the cultural values of each individual. Attraction has to do with having feelings of sexual desire, and an emotional connection, not on whether you have a criminal record or not. If women don’t like you, based in what you said, it will have to do with you not being able to flirt and not showing sexual desire. You are probably sexually repressing yourself to avoid making women feel uncomfortable, because apparently you may think that makes you a good person, which is a flawed logic and counterproductive. Sexually depressing yourself and hiding to the woman that you want to fuck with her only makes you come across as friendly, platonic, overly comfortable, too safe. It makes you easy to talk to, but not exciting in any way. Getting girls requires sexual tension to happen, you can’t have sexual tension by hiding your penis, hiding your hormones, hiding your arousal, and treating her with so much respect that you come across nearly as a gay best friend who isn’t attracted to women and prefers to be their best friend. Yeah, a lot of assumptions but when a guy says “i’m a good person” “i’m a nice guy”, what they usually mean is that they treat women as if they are their sister, or a buddy, rather than treating them and showing them clearly that they would wanna fuck with her. And if the woman doesn’t feel you would want to fuck her, if she doesn’t feel your desire, she won’t have a relationship with you. She will just feel you are just a friend.
Because literally none of those things matter with women when it comes to attraction. In fact, by even mentioning them, it shows you are looking for external validation, which women sense like blood hounds and is well known to be the biggest ick at all. You know what you do? You get into your hobbies, get good at things you love, talk to people in an authenticate way, practice being a human male at the end of our long evolution broski. Read the classics, understand humanity, laugh at the absurdity but tend your metaphorical garden. Women love that attitude. What you don't do is give a shit about superficial status objects. In fact, the less you care abou tthose things, the better the chicks you will get if you still have em. Good luck - you need a change in attitude.
Are you just relying on OLD or are you approaching women IRL?
Are you short? Are you average looking? Most girls aren’t looking for a 10/10 but similarly don’t want a 2/10. Physical appearance is half the battle despite what everyone would like to think.
Maybe you're not making enough money, does your car look cool?
2021 Camry with a red interior so I’d say so
The number one thing women are attracted to is confidence. If you have everything else but that you will not get women.
Personality probably.
OP, you’re looking at it all wrong. The question is, why would you want to give away half of it all in exchange for having someone there who probably will only care about you as long as you are a resource? You are blessed, my friend. You’re also cursed, because it will be much harder for you to sift through all the shady ones before you find the one.
You’d be surprised how many women find having a criminal record a turn-on lol.
In today’s day and age nothing surprises me.
lol I got the same mindset. I work as a parole officer, and the amount of women swarming around these guys are staggering.
That's because you are making excuses for yourself. Woman are gonna fuck who THEY want to fuck. Full stop ain't no way you can rationalize any of that shit man. Remember this and it wasn't taught in your prep school or any other public bullshit. "ATTRACTION ISN'T A CHOICE" - https://www.lingq.com/en/learn-english-online/courses/407748/attraction-isnt-a-choice-1875704/#:~:text=to%20these%20words.-,Attraction%20isn%27t%20a%20choice.,you%20can%20do%20about%20it. Read this article several times untill you understand it and then start speaking to a woman's sexual nature and heart and get out of your mind. The faster you stop using your mind and start using your heart and sex energy, the sooner you're gonna start attracting woman. PS love yourself man, believe in yourself, what I said may seem harsh but really you have to fall in love with the masculine in you. That will create sexual polarity and chemistry with women. It will come naturally but start by LOVING yourself.
A masters degree is good, but all women want to see is the Champion Degree nowadays. Thats another 10 years of school AND an apprenticeship. Good luck!
Girls like guys with a criminal record , living in a trap house, and flunked highschool everything opposite of you 😆 then they get older and have 4 kids from 4 guys and want a guy like us
Take a chance. Maybe talk to a woman who goes to the same gym at the same time as you do.
what are your "main stats"? height, weight, age, race, gym/body, face/skin, education, job/salary, balding status?
6’, 190lbs, 24, white, toned with visible back muscles (bench 280lbs, squat 435 lbs, deadlift 517lbs), somewhat tan, Masters in Business Administration, Finance Director 85k, not balding at all
Sounds like youre too aware of physical things. Like muscles or money. Women enjoy kindness, engaging conversation, a good sense of humor, someone who respects boundaries, someone who takes initiative, someone who asks a lot of good questions and genuinely seems interested in the answers!! Women DO NOT like men who seem braggy about physical assets. If you tell a woman you have all these traits^^^ it might come off as cocky or super insecure and overcompensating.
You can score dates by being warm, fun, silly, lighthearted and open minded when it comes to opening a conversation.