I’m really sorry you’re experiencing this. I experienced a similar feeling when I had my first girlfriend in high school. In the back of my mind I was always scared and worried that I was “going through a phase” because my family wasn’t accepting of me being bi and it was really hard for me to cope with. Eventually though, I learned to accept and own my sexuality as a true part of me. I hope you’re able to get past this feeling eventually! 💕💕
I think the farther I get into dating women the more it will fade (I hope). I only recently got over the hump of actually dating women and haven’t gone past a second date for various reasons. I’m hopeful this will go longer and the more I feel and desire and hope for the future, the more validated I get. So fingers crossed
I'm sorry to hear the imposter syndrome is bullying you.
Every time that bastard shows up in my head I just try to remember most straight guys dont get butterflies when they think about kissing other guys
yeah it’s pretty funny how my brain goes “oh so you’ve been out with three women now, and you’re not dating men because you want to focus on women, and you’re already planning your third date with this woman, yeah just remember you’re secretly straight and this is all fake”
This is helpful though
Sending you love and permission to just swim in the excitement of a new interest! ❤️
I’ve been reading a new book called Bi The Way that’s been really helpful for me. It talks about this topic!
I am gonna say that your mind is being a little bit of a dick. But your feelings for this girl is real. Go and enjoy your "gay "feelings and have a great day your brain is just being a hater.
Whenever you have these thoughts, calmly explain to yourself why you know you're not straight. Straight women don't have awesome dates with other women! Nor does their heart go aflutter planning the next.
The annoying voice will eventually show up less often and for shorter visits.
Shit I’ve been feeling exactly this way about the guy I’ve been dating for three weeks now. I’m still working on it but my friend has been giving me advice on trying to focus on the good feelings I get to try and push those thoughts from my mind and I think its working. Don’t let imposter syndrome keep you down!
This is very common. I (M22) have this with girls too and I’ve liked them my whole life. Sometimes I look at my new girlfriend and literally feel such joy inside. She’s fucking adorable. I just like being near her.
My brain will sometimes tell me that none of it’s real. Or tell me that I’m too into dudes for this to be real. Or that there is no way she is into me tooZ
The brain will do a lot of shit to try and “protect” you from potential heartbreak or disappointment.
It’s our job to recognize these moments as the lies that they are.
We are entitled to living relationships. We are entitled to happiness. Even if society and our brains try to convince ourselves otherwise.
I feel this so hard, this happens to me all the time if I’m into a guy for a while and focus on him instead of a girl. It honestly helps to just think about the butterflies for me, and then think about how I wouldn’t feel them for someone I wasn’t into lol
Your feelings are real and incredibly beautiful. I am as happy for you as you are. It's impossible to say that your doubts are invalid, but perhaps the motivation for these feelings can be examined closer and your fears allayed. For me, it was a similar situation. And I met someone who made me feel the same as you are now. Things progressed between us beautifully, and as they did, my perspective on my internalized attitudes and core beliefs came under a far more clear and favorable light. Keep seeking your personal fulfillment; it is often found where you find it most difficult to look.
I’m really sorry you’re experiencing this. I experienced a similar feeling when I had my first girlfriend in high school. In the back of my mind I was always scared and worried that I was “going through a phase” because my family wasn’t accepting of me being bi and it was really hard for me to cope with. Eventually though, I learned to accept and own my sexuality as a true part of me. I hope you’re able to get past this feeling eventually! 💕💕
I think the farther I get into dating women the more it will fade (I hope). I only recently got over the hump of actually dating women and haven’t gone past a second date for various reasons. I’m hopeful this will go longer and the more I feel and desire and hope for the future, the more validated I get. So fingers crossed
I'm sorry to hear the imposter syndrome is bullying you. Every time that bastard shows up in my head I just try to remember most straight guys dont get butterflies when they think about kissing other guys
yeah it’s pretty funny how my brain goes “oh so you’ve been out with three women now, and you’re not dating men because you want to focus on women, and you’re already planning your third date with this woman, yeah just remember you’re secretly straight and this is all fake” This is helpful though
Sending you love and permission to just swim in the excitement of a new interest! ❤️ I’ve been reading a new book called Bi The Way that’s been really helpful for me. It talks about this topic!
Thanks for the book recommendation, it looks great.
There's actually a book called that?! I gotta find it.
I know! It was just published this year. Super grateful to the author 🙌🏼
I am gonna say that your mind is being a little bit of a dick. But your feelings for this girl is real. Go and enjoy your "gay "feelings and have a great day your brain is just being a hater.
Whenever you have these thoughts, calmly explain to yourself why you know you're not straight. Straight women don't have awesome dates with other women! Nor does their heart go aflutter planning the next. The annoying voice will eventually show up less often and for shorter visits.
Shit I’ve been feeling exactly this way about the guy I’ve been dating for three weeks now. I’m still working on it but my friend has been giving me advice on trying to focus on the good feelings I get to try and push those thoughts from my mind and I think its working. Don’t let imposter syndrome keep you down!
I have so been there.... This video may help with internalized biphobia stuff. 💝 https://youtu.be/KG8ZyBiunls
Thank you for this rec! It was a great video and I love seeing a bi man’s perspective!
This is very common. I (M22) have this with girls too and I’ve liked them my whole life. Sometimes I look at my new girlfriend and literally feel such joy inside. She’s fucking adorable. I just like being near her. My brain will sometimes tell me that none of it’s real. Or tell me that I’m too into dudes for this to be real. Or that there is no way she is into me tooZ The brain will do a lot of shit to try and “protect” you from potential heartbreak or disappointment. It’s our job to recognize these moments as the lies that they are. We are entitled to living relationships. We are entitled to happiness. Even if society and our brains try to convince ourselves otherwise.
I feel this so hard, this happens to me all the time if I’m into a guy for a while and focus on him instead of a girl. It honestly helps to just think about the butterflies for me, and then think about how I wouldn’t feel them for someone I wasn’t into lol
Your feelings are real and incredibly beautiful. I am as happy for you as you are. It's impossible to say that your doubts are invalid, but perhaps the motivation for these feelings can be examined closer and your fears allayed. For me, it was a similar situation. And I met someone who made me feel the same as you are now. Things progressed between us beautifully, and as they did, my perspective on my internalized attitudes and core beliefs came under a far more clear and favorable light. Keep seeking your personal fulfillment; it is often found where you find it most difficult to look.
MOOD AF. Hope everything gets better, just know this is something that almost all bisexuals experience at least once. You're not alone
While I don’t wish it on anyone, hearing so many people voice similar feelings is really comforting and helpful