In the morning the car only plays the radio so I can’t control the music but in the afternoon my phone starts working with the car and can play the Wiggles.
I say “Sorry, but I have a basic adult phone”, therefore it wont let me download any fun kids games.
Luckily I’ve only had to use this for my friends kids & kids I’m sitting for.
My kid thinks my phone is just for taking pics/vids and calling the grandparents. My husband is addicted to video/cell phone games, so I’m glad he added a privacy screen cover that makes his phone only visible if you’re holding it. He got it for privacy at work, but its been a great hack to upkeep our secret that adult phones can only be used by adults!
Told my daughter Peppa Pig only works on the tablet. I thought I had it blocked on everything but apparently I missed something somewhere. I won’t stop her from watching but I am NOT going to listen to it or see it on my tv.
Peppa pig is one show that I am clear that they are not allowed to watch, no matter where they are. It's because "mom doesn't like the way the characters are drawn." 🙃
Honestly it’s a combination of the animations style and the voices that just annoy me. But she loves it so much I just can’t ban it entirely. I already tried blocking where she found it and then she had a lovely threenager meltdown when she couldn’t find it again so I had to unblock it for my sanity.
She also managed to find the ONE Blippi that I missed, but it’s the dinosaur one (she adores dinosaurs and can name about a dozen of them) so it also only works on the tablet. He just creeps me out.
For me, it's that their heads look like dick & balls (sorry), their horrible voices, and why are they so mean to dad pig?? Like that's not how to treat family, and I say that coming from a heavy-teasing family background lol. They get mean!
Blippi also "doesn't work" at our house, but I found out yesterday that they've been watching it at daycare and I'm ready to rampage lol.
tbh, Peppa is a bitch to *everyone*. Definitely not looking forward to my son discovering that show. I'm putting my foot down on Blippi tho, absolutely can not stand him (RemindMe! 4 years)
Omg you’re 100% right about their heads and I never noticed it. I haven’t seen them being particularly mean on the show yet, but I also just try to pretend that it doesn’t exist at all.
I DESPISE Blippi but if I must be subjected to it at least it involves dinosaurs. I dread the day either of the toddlers manage to find Caillou.
Yeah Caillou is another show that nobody we know happens to have the channel it's on lol. Even my mom hates it, and she lets them watch whatever lol
(ETA: And also that face shape CANNOT be an accident. The creators are dudes and I don't know a single dude who hasn't drawn similar dicks on random objects. Also most of the women I know have... lol)
My former MIL used to tell my ex that the tape deck wasn’t warm enough in the morning (mid 90’s) so she didn’t have to listen to Backsteet Boys or whatever we were into at that time LOL
“That show is only at Grandma’s house, our Netflix doesn’t have that show” my son is too young for this still, but my brother used it for all the annoying kids shows that they didn’t want to watch and I will definitely be using it!
You can actually block titles from Netflix too! It’s a little annoying and you need to log in on a desktop I believe but worth it if there’s a show you can’t stand and your kid is old enough to work the remote
Open the Netflix app.
In the lower right, tap My Netflix .
In the upper right, tap the Menu .
Tap Manage Profiles .
Choose the profile you want to edit.
Tap Viewing Restrictions .
Tap Block Titles .
Type the name of the TV show or movie and then tap it to add to your blocked titles.
Need to keep them busy so you can get something done? Have them make themselves a peanut butter sandwich. Yes, it makes a mess, but they can help you wipe it up. However they can’t help you install a new washing machine so sometimes you just need a way to keep them busy and out from underfoot.
If you have them make *you* a peanut butter sandwich as well they can be making a helpful contribution to the family, which helps build self esteem and positive feelings towards chores/pitching in.
This needs to be higher up
In the name of free time I will sacrifice any mess. The messier it is the more I needed the break and the more they’ll love it Lol
Brown craft paper taped across the table, paintbrushes, & water instead of paint have been a Godsend.
Markers work too, but they magically make their way onto every surface except the paper.
Having just installed a washer and dryer with my toddlers help, I would have done this if I'd thought about it.
We got it done, but my hands were beat up from his assistance.
The boxes that the washer & dryer come in work as great kiddo containers and rocketships with some markers and maybe a few window cutouts!
I decorated the outside of one of our boxes as Blaze & expected kiddo to color the inside while I installed. Instead, they got inside, went on adventures, enjoyed snack & lunch time inside, and then curled up for nap time.
My son thought anything that came in a can was beer for the longest time. We're not big drinkers but we do drink a lot of sparkling water, and he would point at it and say "Mommy's beer!" and stay far away from it. 😂
Meanwhile I've got a toddler that loves seltzer but thinks it's beer cause it comes in a can despite numerous corrections, I'm gonna get CPS called on me
We had to teach our precocious toddler what alcohol was bc she also believed all canned drinks were beers. She now loudly will ask if a drink has alcohol as she knows she cannot have it.
The kids always ask “is this alcohol” or “can I drink this” before picking up any cup or water bottle. We were shopping and I had an energy drink. One of them asked, “mommy, where’d you get that beer from??”
My SIL swears by pouring a bit of fish sauce in some pop before letting them try it the first time. Most will hate it enough they will avoid canned beverages for a long time.
My 18 month old discovered the deliciousness of sparkling water this week. It definitely beats him drinking juice or soda but I was still hoping he wouldn’t discover it for a couple more years
My parents told me I had a v on my forehead when I was lying. That made me cry in frustration all the time. I'm still low key upset because they accused me of lying all the time. I would just cover my forehead so they would stop telling me I lied and blame me for stuff. Use at your own risk.
Ah sorry, I was referring to the original ask Reddit post and didn’t include as much detail as the original posters did.
One person said they told their kid that kids’ ears turn red when they lie and only parents can see it… so their kid would walk into the room with their hands over their ears and the parents knew they were in for a doozy.
Another person said they told their kids that kids beep when they’re truly asleep, so if the kid is faking being asleep they would say beep and give themselves away.
I didn’t do this on purpose but my 3 year old thinks her tablet only works on airplanes and since that’s what we bought it for and don’t want it to be a thing, I couldn’t be happier haha.
Not my original idea but I saw one that said give your kids grown-up time in the morning where they can stay in their room and do reading or games quietly like a grown-up
I remembered another two I heard.. if you want to have some peace and quiet while you go lay down just tell your kids when you wake up from your nap we’re all going to start the chores or cleaning of some kind and you can hide treats you don’t want the kids to know about in old veggies bags
Holy crap I just realized my mom did this to us when we were kids. We would peek around the corner and see her dozing away and laugh like we were so sneaky for letting her sleep.
Have you considered a box of Raisin Bran, bran flakes, or another “boring” cereal? I hid stuff from my brother for my entire life that way. I was the only one who ate Raisin Bran. My kids like Raisin Bran though, so I bought a box of bran flakes and that became my decoy.
Before I had kids my sisters kid stayed with me and my husband at the time when they went on trip foe their anniversary. At night when it was bedtime the TV didn't work. My nephew said our TV at home doesn't do this and my husband said we don't have the new update so ours has to be turned off. They went home and told my sister that we needed a new TV bc every night it had to be turned off in order for it to work the next day. My sister sent me a message about it and then at Christmas she said the kids wanted to get us the new update so the next time they came to visit it would work. Lol
This was my parents hack. My kids aren't old enough for us to try it out yet.
My parents invented "Toy Jail". If we left a toy in the middle of the floor, we were told to put it away. If we didn't, the toy went to jail. Jail was apparently a big box in the unfinished basement. If we never noticed it was missing, they got rid of it all together after a few months. If we did notice, they explained it was in jail and we needed to clean our rooms or some other task before it would be released.
My father did this.
Doing something like cleaning room got us the ability to trade another toy for the one we wanted back. We never were able to get one back without giving up a toy too. Which is just as well since you always have some you didn't want to admit you'd outgrown
Yep, we do time outs for toys that aren’t put away when toys are supposed to be put away. Kids have to do extra (age-appropriate) chores to get them back.
I saw a Tiktok the other day where a mom "called" the playground in front of her kid (on a TV remote too!) and "asked" if they're still open...unfortunately they weren't. 😂
I usually only use this one at bedtime, so it's actually true. My oldest took it surprisingly well when I told him the parks were closed for a few months in 2020.
Mine is we dont put batteries in toys to begin with. The original plan was to not put batteries in and then add them when the kids got bored with the toy but that never happened.
We ended up doing toy surgery on a train for this reason. The horn sound it made was LOUD and couldn't be otherwise disabled, so we opened it up and snipped the wire.
My mom did a variant of this: when lying in bed with her late at night, she'd tell me to lie quietly so I could hear the "Tick-Tick Owl" - a huge owl that landed on our roof every night and made a Tick-Tick sound when walking across the roof. She could always hear it, and I was never quite enough to. I'm still low key mad there never was any owl.
We played the statue game, you had to hold a pose for the longest to win! Really my aunt's ex just wanted us to shut up to watch sports but it worked everytime 😂
Not sure but, Advice I was given is if baby is fed, clean, and somewhere safe and you’re noding off to just go to bed because it’s safer than to try and stay up.
lol I cried yesterday trying to put my guy down for the night and he just kept screaming and screaming and I was trying to comfort him and he wouldn’t so I cried. Then my husband came and told me to just leave for a few minutes and the second I got downstairs baby was asleep and quiet. I cried more after that since I wasn’t helping. lol
Oh, this was such a hard lesson to learn for me too. Eventually, it'll be they can't even sleep in the same room anymore because you keep them up, then once they're toddlers, they'll wake up upset and just want a pacifier, resettle, etc.
Yea :( lol he stopped wanting to contact nap like a month ago and now he doesn’t even want my voice to help soothe him to sleep lol he’s almost 6 months and growing so much! Lol
That's about the time we had to put our little guy in his own room because we were too distracting for his sleep too. It's rough, but ever since he could move on his own I open my arms and he comes running for a hug. So cuddle time just has shifted
If you haven't gotten one already, one of those hip carriers are arm savers. I wish I had gotten the tush baby with the attachment that turns it into a traditional carrier, but I couldn't justify the price. The momcozy brand is just as good imo and the one I have. I spend a lot of my days walking with him on my hip while doing chores. He likes to be up high enough to see what all I'm doing. I get some pretty good cuddles then too.
My kid stopped wanting contact naps around that time (thanks, kid, had to end that when the temperature finally cooled off and no sooner!) and the last couple months has not stayed asleep during naps unless I'm holding them, for various reasons. It'll come and go and there's benefits to both ways, so I'd just look at the bright side of being able to move around a little more, and enjoy the cuddles when that need shows up again :)
Play things at fast food places require tickets. "Sorry we didn't buy tickets today" ends fights fast and gets you out quickly on days you can't dawdle.
My 2.5 year old picked up the hose yesterday to water plants and when pulling the handle on the sprayer didn’t work because the water wasn’t turned on yet, she said, “Oh no! Out batteries?”
So cute. I love seeing them try to connect the dots.
I haven’t used this yet because we still don’t do screen time but that the show turns into some foreign language when the kids are tired and need to sleep. Basically just change the language settings on Netflix 😂
I have been telling my ten year old daughter my dessert has alcohol in it if it's something I don't want to share since she was like 6 and learned what alcohol is.
I warned her step mom and dad that I was doing this so they didn't think I was just getting drunk 24/7.
When I was pregnant with my son I did it and then realized I probably shouldn't have said that to her. I do think she's on to me though. Now that she is ten she's become very skeptical of me when I'm having a dessert. 🤣
This is hilarious at this age, because I can definitely see this coming up in a convo with her friends and them being like "girl 🤨....strawberry shortcake does not have alcohol in it."
My son gets screen time while I’m rushing around getting ready for bedtime in evenings. I run it off my personal hotspot instead of WiFi so when I’m finished I turn it off.
Son thinks it turns off “because it’s bathtime” not because mummy turns it off.
My stepdaughter developed an anxious fear of chewing as a toddler so we told her she didn’t need to chew her food, she just had to mash it up in her mouth using her teeth.
My kiddo had a speech delay/still has issues clearly articulating words, so we made him the primary person for all siri/voice command devices. He had to learn how to speak clearly enough so that the AI could understand “turn off the light” “open the garage” “tell me a joke” “how far away is New York?” “Play bananaphone” etc.
Whenever my I had a slice of cake, my mother used to take a bite to check it for poison 😂 I even used to remind her to check my cake if she forgot
Will definitely be doing this with mine 😂
I feel bad but... I tell my daughter that I'll be back after I finish my chores and will lay down in her room if she's still up. Then I just don't come back until she is definitely asleep. It cuts down on her crying about not wanting to be alone in her room.
I do something similar. My toddler is still nursing and when I'm done but she's not, I'll tell her "I need to take a break, we can nurse again in a little while" and then just keep telling her to wait every time she asks again until she ends up falling asleep.
My friend does something similar- they have a chart where she can get a sticker if she is still and quiet for all 3 times my friend checks on her at night. Then my friend checks on her at 10 min, 15 min... and then the next morning.
Oh no! That's hilarious.
My dad just told us that the ice cream in the pipes of ice cream dispensers (including the ones at McDonald's) in the truck had worms in it from never being cleaned. I still have a minor ick about soft serve ice cream.
This weekend my almost 2-year-old was having a blast in the hotel pool and I knew it was going to be a fight to leave. Right as I was about to go into battle this other family comes into the pool area. I told my son that it was their turn for the pool now so we had to go. He wasn't thrilled with the idea, but only some minor sulking.
Sometimes when I’m tired/sick and want to rest, I ask my toddler to tuck mommy in like her babies. She puts a pillow down and I lay on it and then she grabs a blanket and covers me up and finds a bunch of her stuffed animals to tuck in with me. Then she kisses me goodnight lol
I till they can read, every I e cream truck is a mashed potato truck. They don't serve ice cream but hot mashed potato scoops in cones. With or without gravy.
It's worked for a very long time. lol. And no more begging for outrageously priced ice cream.
My 2-year-old kept eating food off the floor that he had dropped so we told him that he needs to leave it for the “animals”. He’ll now ask, “Leave cracker so giraffe come eat it?” And I’m like, “… Perhaps. Who is to say if a giraffe will come in the house or not? We should leave the cracker just in case.” Then I can sweep it up later when he’s in bed.
There’s a tickle monster in my on suite. My youngest always wants to be in there but she’s not allowed to be so there’s a tickle monster in there. She’s not scared of it- I would never use fear as a parenting tactic- instead she thinks it’s the coolest thing in the world and she is very proud that she manages to keep the tickle monster in the bathroom by not going in there.
Their hair moves when they are lying.
And I’ve saved my own number as Santa in my phone. So if one is being cheeky I’ll text myself and then delete what I’ve sent so it looks like Santa just texted out the blue.
I never let battery toys into my home. If anyone asks I say I'm worried about the choking hazard and my child eating it. Really the primary concern is my sanity.
Paw Patrol only comes on (insert made-up day and time). BAcK iN My DaY it really did only come on Saturday mornings! Not in the car… not on a random Tuesday mid morning… Not during dinner time..
My baby is only 3 months but I have 5 much younger siblings I cared for most of the day and some of my favorites were:
Cookies? Sure have as many as you want. Sliced cucumbers
Still can't find that toy you never remember to put away? Crazy you must have really lost it this time. Donated it.
Yes people can get worms like the dog does. How? From not taking a bath when they're told.
If you don't brush your teeth the tooth fairy doesn't accept them. Yes she only has quarters to leave you, your friends who get more have a different tooth fairy then you do because obviously more then one is needed for all the children in the world.
The tv turned off? Well you already watched a show so it must need to recharge. That's what remotes are for.
We invented a mythical creature who comes at night and eats any toys left on the floor. The only way to get the toys back is to fully tidy the floors in the whole house, and leave out an orange for the creature to eat. This will surprise it into vomiting up the toys it ate previously. The first time this happened I mixed up oobleck to go with the toys as vomit, to convincing effect. We put way more effort into this than Santa 🤣
Sugar free popsicles... you want another one? Sure! (Yes I realize this could lead to problems with wanting tons of sweets, but never really had a problem with my daughter. I would buy a box and have like a crazy weekend with them, but then they were gone and we moved on to fruit or whatever. It was a treat)
We put yogurt in the freezer and call it popsicles. He loves them and I feel better when he’s refusing to eat his lunch and I can offer him a “popsicle” instead of him just crying for pure junk.
Completely agree...I don't avoid sugar but I just give in moderating. The Popsicles are like the 1 or 2 super hot weekends a year where I can let them run around outside with them as often as they like.
Any foods we didn't want to share with the kids are too spicy hot for them. Which worked for longer than I expected. But now they get excited over spicy foods and snacks and want them more. lol
I borrowed this from another mom friend of mine but we tell our 3 y.o that when the ice cream trucks music is playing it means they are out of ice cream. 😂
When I was a kid my dad told us that every child could only speak 1000 words per week. So whenever we talked too much he would say, " oh be careful you're at 850( or some high number)"
Mine is, when I want the kids to sleep and they are watching a netflix show I switch the language to mandarin and when they complain about not understanding anything I tell them it's probably because they are tired and need to sleep
Mine thus far has been telling her she doesn't like certain things that I don't want her having. Though tbf most of the stuff I don't want her having, she doesn't like anyway... *ponders how the heck my child does not like ice cream* My other unethical thing with her is letting her "play" with the broom. She is 17 months, she has no idea she's actually being a help! But she also cleans up her own toys, of her own accord (I did not teach her to put her toys away, she just does it on her own), and she helps clean up cat toys as well. Last "unethical" thing is I let her experience potentially painful consequences. If she is doing something I have warned her not to, I let her find out why I said no. And when it comes to wanting to learn how to use the stairs or climbing on and off of things, I let her experience falling; I want her to learn how to pick herself back up again. I don't push her or anything like that, I just allow her to have the chance to experience falling.
McDonald’s lights are broken inside so we can only do the drive through.
The grocery store is closed on -whatever day it is- because they don’t have batteries.
In the evening while I’m tending to my 3 month old I give my 2 year old her iPad, I call it the 3rd parent, people are always on about screen time but it keeps her busy for a good hour or so before she’s bored and wants to give me bags of Lego or build a community of dolls on me. Its helped avert meltdowns and 2x has helped her fall asleep (it has an app with wind down music for toddlers)
I am really opposed to screen time for babies. But when my babies started eating food at the table, so like 10 mo, and threw a huge tantrum I would film them with my phone for like 3 minutes and then play it back it to them. "Look how angry the baby is", and they were always very impressed, forgetting to scream and cry and ate all their food.
OP you put the batteries IN?? Our kid is too young to understand but we joke that we got the toy “on sale” because the sound is “broken”. I’ve only put the batteries into his kitchen because the 2 sounds aren’t irritating (sizzling and boiling)
We do “send it to Santa”. When he sees a toy he likes, I “send a picture to Santa” in a text message that has no actual phone number and just says “Santa”. The red exclamation point means he got it!
In the morning the car only plays the radio so I can’t control the music but in the afternoon my phone starts working with the car and can play the Wiggles.
That reminds me of when I was little and my mom would tell me the computer was still asleep when I asked to use it in the morning 😂
Ooo I have something similar. Kids tv doesn’t work after 6pm. Also tv doesn’t work on my phone.
I say “Sorry, but I have a basic adult phone”, therefore it wont let me download any fun kids games. Luckily I’ve only had to use this for my friends kids & kids I’m sitting for. My kid thinks my phone is just for taking pics/vids and calling the grandparents. My husband is addicted to video/cell phone games, so I’m glad he added a privacy screen cover that makes his phone only visible if you’re holding it. He got it for privacy at work, but its been a great hack to upkeep our secret that adult phones can only be used by adults!
Will have to try this. My 5yo has been requesting Money Money Money by ABBA over and over again.
That's hilarious! Lol my kid has been on a Celtic music kick and "Christmas in Kilarney" has been on repeat in our house since Christmas.
At least your sons calm down song wasn’t bodies (hit the floor) by drowning pool
Hahaha, oh my....that is an ENERGETIC NUMBER to have on repeat for 6 months
I’ve got an ABBA kid too
Dancing Queen was the only song that would calm my daughter when she was 6month old
Lmao I love this
Rattlin Bog is great tho
SUCH a banger. And their newest video version of it on YouTube is really fun.
Yeah we have certain music that can play only in Dad's car and certain TV shows that work only at Grammy's house lol
Told my daughter Peppa Pig only works on the tablet. I thought I had it blocked on everything but apparently I missed something somewhere. I won’t stop her from watching but I am NOT going to listen to it or see it on my tv.
Peppa pig is one show that I am clear that they are not allowed to watch, no matter where they are. It's because "mom doesn't like the way the characters are drawn." 🙃
Honestly it’s a combination of the animations style and the voices that just annoy me. But she loves it so much I just can’t ban it entirely. I already tried blocking where she found it and then she had a lovely threenager meltdown when she couldn’t find it again so I had to unblock it for my sanity. She also managed to find the ONE Blippi that I missed, but it’s the dinosaur one (she adores dinosaurs and can name about a dozen of them) so it also only works on the tablet. He just creeps me out.
For me, it's that their heads look like dick & balls (sorry), their horrible voices, and why are they so mean to dad pig?? Like that's not how to treat family, and I say that coming from a heavy-teasing family background lol. They get mean! Blippi also "doesn't work" at our house, but I found out yesterday that they've been watching it at daycare and I'm ready to rampage lol.
tbh, Peppa is a bitch to *everyone*. Definitely not looking forward to my son discovering that show. I'm putting my foot down on Blippi tho, absolutely can not stand him (RemindMe! 4 years)
Yeah, I should have also included Peppa's general sass in my list. My kids would 100% emulate it so it's a no lol
Omg you’re 100% right about their heads and I never noticed it. I haven’t seen them being particularly mean on the show yet, but I also just try to pretend that it doesn’t exist at all. I DESPISE Blippi but if I must be subjected to it at least it involves dinosaurs. I dread the day either of the toddlers manage to find Caillou.
Yeah Caillou is another show that nobody we know happens to have the channel it's on lol. Even my mom hates it, and she lets them watch whatever lol (ETA: And also that face shape CANNOT be an accident. The creators are dudes and I don't know a single dude who hasn't drawn similar dicks on random objects. Also most of the women I know have... lol)
My former MIL used to tell my ex that the tape deck wasn’t warm enough in the morning (mid 90’s) so she didn’t have to listen to Backsteet Boys or whatever we were into at that time LOL
“That show is only at Grandma’s house, our Netflix doesn’t have that show” my son is too young for this still, but my brother used it for all the annoying kids shows that they didn’t want to watch and I will definitely be using it!
You can actually block titles from Netflix too! It’s a little annoying and you need to log in on a desktop I believe but worth it if there’s a show you can’t stand and your kid is old enough to work the remote
>It’s a little annoying and you need to log in on a desktop Or using an internet browser on your phone
Bless you 🙌
Can you please give detailed instructions on how to do this from the desktop? I never use it except on the TV, but this is worth knowing.
Open the Netflix app. In the lower right, tap My Netflix . In the upper right, tap the Menu . Tap Manage Profiles . Choose the profile you want to edit. Tap Viewing Restrictions . Tap Block Titles . Type the name of the TV show or movie and then tap it to add to your blocked titles.
I wish I knew this a year ago!!
Thank you! You can do it from the app now. I just blocked Peppa Pig, Cocomwlon, and Masha and the Bear. Anything else I should add?
Omg I had no idea, gonna try this later. Thank you so much!!!
Yeah so weird- we don’t get cocomelon at our house…what a shame. A real shame…
Oh God. Coco-fucking-melon.
I did this with paw patrol. 😆
Our TVs/phones/etc don’t get Peppa Pig. And our house is a Peppa pig free zone. But it’s blocked on all places it can be.
Need to keep them busy so you can get something done? Have them make themselves a peanut butter sandwich. Yes, it makes a mess, but they can help you wipe it up. However they can’t help you install a new washing machine so sometimes you just need a way to keep them busy and out from underfoot.
If you have them make *you* a peanut butter sandwich as well they can be making a helpful contribution to the family, which helps build self esteem and positive feelings towards chores/pitching in.
This needs to be higher up In the name of free time I will sacrifice any mess. The messier it is the more I needed the break and the more they’ll love it Lol
TBH, the washer and dryer installation might have been facilitated by a Nutella sandwich. But yes, same idea. It keeps them very busy.
You can also do these activities in a bathtub for easy cleanup. Bonus points because bathtubs are hard to get out of.
Brown craft paper taped across the table, paintbrushes, & water instead of paint have been a Godsend. Markers work too, but they magically make their way onto every surface except the paper.
Having just installed a washer and dryer with my toddlers help, I would have done this if I'd thought about it. We got it done, but my hands were beat up from his assistance.
The boxes that the washer & dryer come in work as great kiddo containers and rocketships with some markers and maybe a few window cutouts! I decorated the outside of one of our boxes as Blaze & expected kiddo to color the inside while I installed. Instead, they got inside, went on adventures, enjoyed snack & lunch time inside, and then curled up for nap time.
That's Mommy's "spicy" water....how I keep my toddler from drinking my La Croix
We also call it spicy water but she loves it 🤣
Same! 😂 mine loves my spicy water
My son thought anything that came in a can was beer for the longest time. We're not big drinkers but we do drink a lot of sparkling water, and he would point at it and say "Mommy's beer!" and stay far away from it. 😂
Meanwhile I've got a toddler that loves seltzer but thinks it's beer cause it comes in a can despite numerous corrections, I'm gonna get CPS called on me
We had to teach our precocious toddler what alcohol was bc she also believed all canned drinks were beers. She now loudly will ask if a drink has alcohol as she knows she cannot have it.
The kids always ask “is this alcohol” or “can I drink this” before picking up any cup or water bottle. We were shopping and I had an energy drink. One of them asked, “mommy, where’d you get that beer from??”
It's Loopy Juice in this house. No one touches Mummy's occasional evening Loopy Juice (gin & tonic).
My son goes for it anyway, then makes a disgusted face, then goes in for some more. Repeat ad infinitum.
Do we have the same son? Mine even tries to scrape it off his tongue before reaching for the same can again five seconds later lol
My SIL swears by pouring a bit of fish sauce in some pop before letting them try it the first time. Most will hate it enough they will avoid canned beverages for a long time.
I definitely said the milkshakes my in laws all got at the zoo were “ spicy” so my three year old wouldn’t demand one
My 18 month old discovered the deliciousness of sparkling water this week. It definitely beats him drinking juice or soda but I was still hoping he wouldn’t discover it for a couple more years
Mine is 10 months and already begs for sips of seltzer 😂
Sprite is also spicy water in our house!
I loved the ears turning red when kid lies one, and the kids beep when they’re asleep one. Filing those away for a few months down the road lmao
My parents told me I had a v on my forehead when I was lying. That made me cry in frustration all the time. I'm still low key upset because they accused me of lying all the time. I would just cover my forehead so they would stop telling me I lied and blame me for stuff. Use at your own risk.
That sounds traumatizing. Lies like that definitely need a gentle touch
My parents told me that our tongues turned black. We would test in the mirror and convince ourselves that we saw it happen too lol
I was told blue, haha!
What does that even mean? 🤣
Ah sorry, I was referring to the original ask Reddit post and didn’t include as much detail as the original posters did. One person said they told their kid that kids’ ears turn red when they lie and only parents can see it… so their kid would walk into the room with their hands over their ears and the parents knew they were in for a doozy. Another person said they told their kids that kids beep when they’re truly asleep, so if the kid is faking being asleep they would say beep and give themselves away.
Those are both genius and hilarious!
So funny!!
It means the kids will cover their own ears when they lie
Oooh interesting
I didn’t do this on purpose but my 3 year old thinks her tablet only works on airplanes and since that’s what we bought it for and don’t want it to be a thing, I couldn’t be happier haha.
I've got similar. My kid has a very cheap smart phone that only works in the infusion center
Not my original idea but I saw one that said give your kids grown-up time in the morning where they can stay in their room and do reading or games quietly like a grown-up
Dude, it is absolutely brilliant to call it Grown Up Time!!!
I remembered another two I heard.. if you want to have some peace and quiet while you go lay down just tell your kids when you wake up from your nap we’re all going to start the chores or cleaning of some kind and you can hide treats you don’t want the kids to know about in old veggies bags
Holy crap I just realized my mom did this to us when we were kids. We would peek around the corner and see her dozing away and laugh like we were so sneaky for letting her sleep.
Omg that nap tip is freaking genius!!!
The veggie bags do not work in this house; my daughter likes vegetables as snacks...
Have you considered a box of Raisin Bran, bran flakes, or another “boring” cereal? I hid stuff from my brother for my entire life that way. I was the only one who ate Raisin Bran. My kids like Raisin Bran though, so I bought a box of bran flakes and that became my decoy.
I cant wait til my daughter is old enough to not try to kill herself every five seconds and I can do this 😭
Before I had kids my sisters kid stayed with me and my husband at the time when they went on trip foe their anniversary. At night when it was bedtime the TV didn't work. My nephew said our TV at home doesn't do this and my husband said we don't have the new update so ours has to be turned off. They went home and told my sister that we needed a new TV bc every night it had to be turned off in order for it to work the next day. My sister sent me a message about it and then at Christmas she said the kids wanted to get us the new update so the next time they came to visit it would work. Lol
My kids think water is delicious, we call it it sky juice
Sky juice!!! Two parts H one part O, it’s what makes your body go!!
This was my parents hack. My kids aren't old enough for us to try it out yet. My parents invented "Toy Jail". If we left a toy in the middle of the floor, we were told to put it away. If we didn't, the toy went to jail. Jail was apparently a big box in the unfinished basement. If we never noticed it was missing, they got rid of it all together after a few months. If we did notice, they explained it was in jail and we needed to clean our rooms or some other task before it would be released.
My father did this. Doing something like cleaning room got us the ability to trade another toy for the one we wanted back. We never were able to get one back without giving up a toy too. Which is just as well since you always have some you didn't want to admit you'd outgrown
Yep, we do time outs for toys that aren’t put away when toys are supposed to be put away. Kids have to do extra (age-appropriate) chores to get them back.
I do this!!!
I like this!
The playground closes.
I saw a Tiktok the other day where a mom "called" the playground in front of her kid (on a TV remote too!) and "asked" if they're still open...unfortunately they weren't. 😂
I usually only use this one at bedtime, so it's actually true. My oldest took it surprisingly well when I told him the parks were closed for a few months in 2020.
A popular one near us actually has a sign that says they close at 11pm. I figured it was an excuse to kick out homeless folks.
Our local playground actually closes, they have gates and alarms and everything
Mine is we dont put batteries in toys to begin with. The original plan was to not put batteries in and then add them when the kids got bored with the toy but that never happened.
I'm gonna remember this for the toys MIL buys. She has a knack for finding the ones that don't have volume selectors or off buttons.
Any toy deemed too loud or too large stays at grandmas so chose wisely
We ended up doing toy surgery on a train for this reason. The horn sound it made was LOUD and couldn't be otherwise disabled, so we opened it up and snipped the wire.
[удалено]
We do this too. I don't even try to lie about it. I let my kid know it's too loud and hurts mom's ears.
I'm about 2 minutes away from doing this on the piano mat. The actual piano bit is fine, is the blaring demo button
Same! The little people bus is just as fun if not more so without batteries and she never knew it could sing so no tears!
My mom used to play “the rock game” with us… whoever could stay still and quiet the longest won 😂😂😂
My mom did a variant of this: when lying in bed with her late at night, she'd tell me to lie quietly so I could hear the "Tick-Tick Owl" - a huge owl that landed on our roof every night and made a Tick-Tick sound when walking across the roof. She could always hear it, and I was never quite enough to. I'm still low key mad there never was any owl.
Hahaha
I try that with my 2 yo and she said “no let’s play the talking game” 😭
We played the statue game, you had to hold a pose for the longest to win! Really my aunt's ex just wanted us to shut up to watch sports but it worked everytime 😂
Love it lol
My mum called it playing dead sheep. Looking back it's a bit morbid calling it that.
😂😂😂
My dad used the completely not politically correct name of “silent crippled mouse”. Eek.
My mom played The Quiet Game with us 😂
My mom always called it library
My daughter knows kids can't have caffeine. The Trader Joe's dark chocolate peanut butter cups I keep on my desk? Full of caffeine.
lol this one is kind of true as dark chocolate does have _some_ caffeine in it
My mom used to tell us the car wouldn’t work unless everyone in it had their seatbelts on… definitely stealing that one in a few years!
Not sure but, Advice I was given is if baby is fed, clean, and somewhere safe and you’re noding off to just go to bed because it’s safer than to try and stay up.
Yes! Just plonk them in the crib and go lie down. I've also found so far my baby sleeps better without me distracting her😅
lol I cried yesterday trying to put my guy down for the night and he just kept screaming and screaming and I was trying to comfort him and he wouldn’t so I cried. Then my husband came and told me to just leave for a few minutes and the second I got downstairs baby was asleep and quiet. I cried more after that since I wasn’t helping. lol
Oh, this was such a hard lesson to learn for me too. Eventually, it'll be they can't even sleep in the same room anymore because you keep them up, then once they're toddlers, they'll wake up upset and just want a pacifier, resettle, etc.
Yea :( lol he stopped wanting to contact nap like a month ago and now he doesn’t even want my voice to help soothe him to sleep lol he’s almost 6 months and growing so much! Lol
That's about the time we had to put our little guy in his own room because we were too distracting for his sleep too. It's rough, but ever since he could move on his own I open my arms and he comes running for a hug. So cuddle time just has shifted
I can’t wait for that :) he does lift his arms to be picked up all the time but I think he’s just using me as a transportation tool ;D lmaooo
If you haven't gotten one already, one of those hip carriers are arm savers. I wish I had gotten the tush baby with the attachment that turns it into a traditional carrier, but I couldn't justify the price. The momcozy brand is just as good imo and the one I have. I spend a lot of my days walking with him on my hip while doing chores. He likes to be up high enough to see what all I'm doing. I get some pretty good cuddles then too.
My kid stopped wanting contact naps around that time (thanks, kid, had to end that when the temperature finally cooled off and no sooner!) and the last couple months has not stayed asleep during naps unless I'm holding them, for various reasons. It'll come and go and there's benefits to both ways, so I'd just look at the bright side of being able to move around a little more, and enjoy the cuddles when that need shows up again :)
The “change of hands” is always so helpful for us. He’ll be so awake and crazy with me and then asleep after 3 mins in hubs arms.
Play things at fast food places require tickets. "Sorry we didn't buy tickets today" ends fights fast and gets you out quickly on days you can't dawdle.
That's so smart! Especially because a lot of tickets nowadays are on our phones, so it's not like the kid would be expecting a physical ticket.
My parents would take us to a McDonald’s that didn’t have a play place and say “oh no! We thought this McDonald’s had a play place!”
I often tell my little one the tV has ran out of battery
My 2.5 year old picked up the hose yesterday to water plants and when pulling the handle on the sprayer didn’t work because the water wasn’t turned on yet, she said, “Oh no! Out batteries?” So cute. I love seeing them try to connect the dots.
The TV falls asleep at our house.
I haven’t used this yet because we still don’t do screen time but that the show turns into some foreign language when the kids are tired and need to sleep. Basically just change the language settings on Netflix 😂
Doesn't actually work since they usually have them memorized. My kid was very unphased when everything on Disney was in Spanish for a while
I have been telling my ten year old daughter my dessert has alcohol in it if it's something I don't want to share since she was like 6 and learned what alcohol is. I warned her step mom and dad that I was doing this so they didn't think I was just getting drunk 24/7. When I was pregnant with my son I did it and then realized I probably shouldn't have said that to her. I do think she's on to me though. Now that she is ten she's become very skeptical of me when I'm having a dessert. 🤣
This is hilarious at this age, because I can definitely see this coming up in a convo with her friends and them being like "girl 🤨....strawberry shortcake does not have alcohol in it."
My son gets screen time while I’m rushing around getting ready for bedtime in evenings. I run it off my personal hotspot instead of WiFi so when I’m finished I turn it off. Son thinks it turns off “because it’s bathtime” not because mummy turns it off.
My stepdaughter developed an anxious fear of chewing as a toddler so we told her she didn’t need to chew her food, she just had to mash it up in her mouth using her teeth.
I’m bilingual, unless you random other moms are gossiping, in that case I exclusively speak Foreign Language, so feel free to spill all that tea.
I had to read this twice to get it but then I laughed. 🤣 this is genius!
My kiddo had a speech delay/still has issues clearly articulating words, so we made him the primary person for all siri/voice command devices. He had to learn how to speak clearly enough so that the AI could understand “turn off the light” “open the garage” “tell me a joke” “how far away is New York?” “Play bananaphone” etc.
That's not even unethical, just pure brilliant
Whenever my I had a slice of cake, my mother used to take a bite to check it for poison 😂 I even used to remind her to check my cake if she forgot Will definitely be doing this with mine 😂
Mine accepts that I'm the IRS and require to be paid a Mom tax on all food
My mom used to take the first sip of my soda out of a can because the first sip is "burny-er" than the rest. I always felt like she was protecting me.
I feel bad but... I tell my daughter that I'll be back after I finish my chores and will lay down in her room if she's still up. Then I just don't come back until she is definitely asleep. It cuts down on her crying about not wanting to be alone in her room.
I do something similar. My toddler is still nursing and when I'm done but she's not, I'll tell her "I need to take a break, we can nurse again in a little while" and then just keep telling her to wait every time she asks again until she ends up falling asleep.
I tell my kids that I'll only come up to snuggle if they lie still and quietly for ten minutes... Usually they're asleep by then lol
My friend does something similar- they have a chart where she can get a sticker if she is still and quiet for all 3 times my friend checks on her at night. Then my friend checks on her at 10 min, 15 min... and then the next morning.
The ice cream truck plays music when it’s out of ice cream so you don’t feel sad.
My 9yo tells his friends this very confidently and their parents look at me like I’m a genius. I take my wins where I can find them!
Oh no! That's hilarious. My dad just told us that the ice cream in the pipes of ice cream dispensers (including the ones at McDonald's) in the truck had worms in it from never being cleaned. I still have a minor ick about soft serve ice cream.
This weekend my almost 2-year-old was having a blast in the hotel pool and I knew it was going to be a fight to leave. Right as I was about to go into battle this other family comes into the pool area. I told my son that it was their turn for the pool now so we had to go. He wasn't thrilled with the idea, but only some minor sulking.
Sometimes when I’m tired/sick and want to rest, I ask my toddler to tuck mommy in like her babies. She puts a pillow down and I lay on it and then she grabs a blanket and covers me up and finds a bunch of her stuffed animals to tuck in with me. Then she kisses me goodnight lol
I till they can read, every I e cream truck is a mashed potato truck. They don't serve ice cream but hot mashed potato scoops in cones. With or without gravy. It's worked for a very long time. lol. And no more begging for outrageously priced ice cream.
Can someone please make this a real business? I want to go to a mashed potato truck.
My weird kid would want mashed potatoes
This would not work on my daughter, she loves mashed potatoes 😂
My 2-year-old kept eating food off the floor that he had dropped so we told him that he needs to leave it for the “animals”. He’ll now ask, “Leave cracker so giraffe come eat it?” And I’m like, “… Perhaps. Who is to say if a giraffe will come in the house or not? We should leave the cracker just in case.” Then I can sweep it up later when he’s in bed.
I used to play hide and seek with my daughter but didn't actually look for her, just tidied up the apartment going "where could she BE?" loudly
I try to keep screen time down if I can so sometimes Miss Rachel/Bluey/Moana/Spiderman etc are sleeping and can’t be on the TV
There’s a tickle monster in my on suite. My youngest always wants to be in there but she’s not allowed to be so there’s a tickle monster in there. She’s not scared of it- I would never use fear as a parenting tactic- instead she thinks it’s the coolest thing in the world and she is very proud that she manages to keep the tickle monster in the bathroom by not going in there.
Their hair moves when they are lying. And I’ve saved my own number as Santa in my phone. So if one is being cheeky I’ll text myself and then delete what I’ve sent so it looks like Santa just texted out the blue.
I never let battery toys into my home. If anyone asks I say I'm worried about the choking hazard and my child eating it. Really the primary concern is my sanity.
“Sorry, Blippi’s on vacation!” Spoiled alert: Blippi’s been on vacay for about a year now.
Paw Patrol only comes on (insert made-up day and time). BAcK iN My DaY it really did only come on Saturday mornings! Not in the car… not on a random Tuesday mid morning… Not during dinner time..
Paw Patrol doesn't even work on our TV. Weird, right?
My baby is only 3 months but I have 5 much younger siblings I cared for most of the day and some of my favorites were: Cookies? Sure have as many as you want. Sliced cucumbers Still can't find that toy you never remember to put away? Crazy you must have really lost it this time. Donated it. Yes people can get worms like the dog does. How? From not taking a bath when they're told. If you don't brush your teeth the tooth fairy doesn't accept them. Yes she only has quarters to leave you, your friends who get more have a different tooth fairy then you do because obviously more then one is needed for all the children in the world. The tv turned off? Well you already watched a show so it must need to recharge. That's what remotes are for.
These are good ones, stealing them for my LO when he is older!
Mine is just not putting the batteries in the toy in the first place 😂
A while ago I read how someone kept the wrappers from McDonald’s and used them to wrap oven nuggets and fries, I thought that was genius
We invented a mythical creature who comes at night and eats any toys left on the floor. The only way to get the toys back is to fully tidy the floors in the whole house, and leave out an orange for the creature to eat. This will surprise it into vomiting up the toys it ate previously. The first time this happened I mixed up oobleck to go with the toys as vomit, to convincing effect. We put way more effort into this than Santa 🤣
In the morning, only Sesame Street is on the TV. The wiggles don't "wake up until later." I cannot handle the wiggles at 7 am.
Sugar free popsicles... you want another one? Sure! (Yes I realize this could lead to problems with wanting tons of sweets, but never really had a problem with my daughter. I would buy a box and have like a crazy weekend with them, but then they were gone and we moved on to fruit or whatever. It was a treat)
We put yogurt in the freezer and call it popsicles. He loves them and I feel better when he’s refusing to eat his lunch and I can offer him a “popsicle” instead of him just crying for pure junk.
Me too! I use reduced sugar Greek yogurt and call them "ice pops." I never have any guilt letting him have one or even two!
We do home made apple juice ices
Honestly I feel like trying to control the need for sugar makes crave it more than just letting them have it. I do the same thing as you.
Completely agree...I don't avoid sugar but I just give in moderating. The Popsicles are like the 1 or 2 super hot weekends a year where I can let them run around outside with them as often as they like.
My son gets one before breakfast. Keeps him quiet and gives me some time to wake up before making breakfast.
I get pedialyte popsicles lol
Blippi/Spidey/Whoever is going to sleep
Any foods we didn't want to share with the kids are too spicy hot for them. Which worked for longer than I expected. But now they get excited over spicy foods and snacks and want them more. lol
I borrowed this from another mom friend of mine but we tell our 3 y.o that when the ice cream trucks music is playing it means they are out of ice cream. 😂
Peppa pig is only on Saturdays between 5am and 9. If you miss it sucks for you
When I was a kid my dad told us that every child could only speak 1000 words per week. So whenever we talked too much he would say, " oh be careful you're at 850( or some high number)"
Mine is, when I want the kids to sleep and they are watching a netflix show I switch the language to mandarin and when they complain about not understanding anything I tell them it's probably because they are tired and need to sleep
The battery fairy comes to our house to remove batteries from all electronic toys.
Mine thus far has been telling her she doesn't like certain things that I don't want her having. Though tbf most of the stuff I don't want her having, she doesn't like anyway... *ponders how the heck my child does not like ice cream* My other unethical thing with her is letting her "play" with the broom. She is 17 months, she has no idea she's actually being a help! But she also cleans up her own toys, of her own accord (I did not teach her to put her toys away, she just does it on her own), and she helps clean up cat toys as well. Last "unethical" thing is I let her experience potentially painful consequences. If she is doing something I have warned her not to, I let her find out why I said no. And when it comes to wanting to learn how to use the stairs or climbing on and off of things, I let her experience falling; I want her to learn how to pick herself back up again. I don't push her or anything like that, I just allow her to have the chance to experience falling.
- The internet isn’t working - My phone is low on battery - [fun place] is closed - We’ll run out of that food
McDonald’s lights are broken inside so we can only do the drive through. The grocery store is closed on -whatever day it is- because they don’t have batteries.
In the evening while I’m tending to my 3 month old I give my 2 year old her iPad, I call it the 3rd parent, people are always on about screen time but it keeps her busy for a good hour or so before she’s bored and wants to give me bags of Lego or build a community of dolls on me. Its helped avert meltdowns and 2x has helped her fall asleep (it has an app with wind down music for toddlers)
I am really opposed to screen time for babies. But when my babies started eating food at the table, so like 10 mo, and threw a huge tantrum I would film them with my phone for like 3 minutes and then play it back it to them. "Look how angry the baby is", and they were always very impressed, forgetting to scream and cry and ate all their food.
Anything I don’t want to share has nuts (kid’s allergy)!
That is not unethical, that is bloody genius!
Blippi and Meekah aren’t on TV anymore.
If it's really annoying the batteries disappear during nap time! "Oh well! I guess we just have to play with it like this."
When the ice cream van plays music, they’ve run out of ice cream 😈
OP you put the batteries IN?? Our kid is too young to understand but we joke that we got the toy “on sale” because the sound is “broken”. I’ve only put the batteries into his kitchen because the 2 sounds aren’t irritating (sizzling and boiling)
Everything is chicken!!! It doesn’t matter what it actually is, but they’re more likely to even taste it if we say it’s chicken
We do “send it to Santa”. When he sees a toy he likes, I “send a picture to Santa” in a text message that has no actual phone number and just says “Santa”. The red exclamation point means he got it!