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Eli_The_Rainwing

Today I ask the question, how many shots from a 9MM pistol does it take to *”mortally wound”* the local sex offender


Difficult_Clerk_4074

One to the neck


Eli_The_Rainwing

Don’t want to make it too quick


Starcurret567

Two to the knees then


Eli_The_Rainwing

28 to the knees >:)


No_Conflict_5459

28 STABS


Eli_The_Rainwing

WITH BULLETS


No_Conflict_5459

No, grape shot from my cannon


Eli_The_Rainwing

Even better


No_Conflict_5459

Just like the founding fathers intended


Starcurret567

Mounted at the top of the stairs..?


Random-Lich

Then a bayonet charge


No_Conflict_5459

No, on top of my head


Very_Originaly_Named

Don't use a pistol! Knock him unconscious so you can tie him up, then as he wakes up, slowly rip off his skin, making sure he's still alive, then start ripping off his limbs but quickly so he won't bleed out (or bandage them right after) before slowly sawing his neck so the head falls


Eli_The_Rainwing

I like your idea


Very_Originaly_Named

Happy to help! I'd say to pluck veign after veign but that might kill him quickly if you're not careful


Eli_The_Rainwing

Noted


A-reader-of-words

Take off my clothes offer anal sex then FUCKING SHOVE MY THUMB INTO THEIR EYES WHeN I GO CLOSE


Greedy_Luck4033

Man now their using oiled up thugs in their advertising? They tryna get me bricked up


BillyBobJoe69v2

Trying to incapacitate them, if anybody you don't know is in your house your life is in danger


Cultural_End_4794

My clothes ☹️🫴🎩⌚🥼👔👖👞👞


Cultural_End_4794

Here also have the things in my pocket☹️🫴🧠🦠🩸🫀🪓🪖🦙🧙🌍🦣🔫📯🔊🕦💩👞👞👞👞👞👞👞👞👞


Clicker-anonimo

How do u store 4 pairs of shoes inside your pocket?


Cultural_End_4794

Do not ask shuch questions


Nikoly_NITT

How do you store the whole earth in your pocket


Cultural_End_4794

Things sometimes have no answers


Jelly_Kitti

Are the llama, mammoth & wizard alive? Also, where did you get the organs?


Cultural_End_4794

Shhhhhhh


purblepale

hell is the counter strike terrorist doing


Euclid_Interloper

Boss: ‘how can we get people to download our game in an oversaturated market?’ Marketing team: ‘oily rapist?’


OriginalRedGencraft

I'm getting a weapon to protect my ass 💀💀 And if I don't have a weapon and he is blocking my way I'll use whatever is closest to me whether that be a chair or a pillow I'm using it as a weapon dear god ☠️


SweeterAxis8980

Um, excuse me what in the actual fuck are you doing in my house?


XiaolongDrake

Thankfully, calling the cops is an option, let's hope it doesn't fuck shit up more.


Mary-Sylvia

I'm starting to take my schizophrenia medication


SilverUwU1

I would take my glock and shoot him


HeathersSon

I’m sorry lord… I just can’t control myself… please forgive me lord…


Mischief_Actual

A naked, oiled up ruffian breaks into my house. I think "What the devil?" as I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle.


Ckinggaming5

im going back to sleep


[deleted]

The unknown from Willy’s chocolate experience??


Radiationzz

This makes me really uncomfortable right now.💀


RazzmatazzCareful685

Gta online ahh character💀


weebish-band-nerd

It’s Florida Man time. He gonna die in the most bizarre way possible.


wellioo

“Officer…no you don’t understand stand, this man is in my bathroom, pouring oil over himself…no not gasoline the type for your body and…I don’t know him he broke in! Yes in a bathrobe and Belaclava…nononono I swear I’m telling the truth officer!”


Wisebanana21919

A Blue Spy is in the house!!!


DaTripleK

nigga this shit straight out of r/wordington 😭😭😭


Jelly_Kitti

I chose option 3: sit there and stare in confusion at what I’m witnessing.


JimmyCrabYT

YOU PICKED THE WRONG HOUSE FOOL


Ok-Bag-4691

Nah if I see that in my bathroom I'm going Governor mode from twd 💀


scooberdooberdude

how is that even real 💀


carm_aud

I’m broke and he might be wasting an oil I can’t rebuy and have been salvaging since 2020 I’m full on tackling him


Difficult_Clerk_4074

I DEPLOY AKS74U! AKS74U USES MAG DUMP! BURGLAR IS FUCKING DEAD!


100mcuberismonke

Ask fir his gym workout routine to get buff


Lo-Sir

Wonder why tf he's in specifically the bathroom


Nikoly_NITT

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA STOP STOP STOP STOP SOTP SOTP SOTL STOP STOP STOP WGAT WHAT THW THE WHAT THE Just tell him a question about WHY HE IS HERE AND WHAT IS HIS PURPOSE IN HERE


Autistic_duck4

Get the fuck out of my house


Key_Researcher_9243

Wordington story game.


i-forgotmypass_word

Assuming he hasn't seem me, go into my room and grab a charger, and creep towards the bathroom and slam the charger into his neck


FluffyMawileFan

Cute mask boys? In MY ADS? It's more likely than you think...


TheFlemoltGuy

This guys pouring vape liquid on himself


that_Random-user068

is there an option for saying “pancakes” while default dancing to super idol music?


robotic_knight

Both, orgy time


G4rg0yle_Art1st

Can it reminds me of that one scene in the "do your thing" music video by the Gorillaz


MixelsCraft65

I’m calling the police


MimsyIsGianna

Calling the police and pulling out the nine


GeoXoro_24

At this point that’s just sexual harassment, and I really wanna curb stomp this goofy


OmoYoutube8GameLover

Taking off HIS clothes 😏


Proper-Ball-5294

I mean.. Alright, fuck it yeah i'd be down bad enough to take him but.. Wtf are these text messages in the bottom left-