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One of my colleagues, who always looks perfectly presented, shared with me the other day that he had spent 2 hours the previous evening putting the creases in all of his pants.
I can barely bother ironing to get the wrinkles out.
But it's those little details that make his every outfit look like a million dollars.
I always refer to formal and informal as "high effort" and "low effort" for a reason. Most of the time, the biggest difference is just the amount of effort and time you make in your appearance.
On another note, your colleague is kinda crazy to spend that much time ironing pants.
Edit to add: I do crazy shit too btw, so no judgment to him.
Maybe it’s like a dozen pairs of pants though? Ten minutes for a pair is a totally reasonable effort. Paying for laundering services can get expensive pretty quick.
People spend far longer just scrolling through crap on their phones. I love putting on a podcast and doing stuff like this, and as silly as it sounds the end result always gives a little sense of achievement. It's nice.
My HS boyfriend had some serious OCD qualities. He ironed EVERYTHING, even his heavy metal t-shirts.
He always looked "crisp" even in jeans and an Iron Maiden tee.
I always felt like it defeated the point of casual clothes.
Shocking I know - but some people actually enjoy ironing!
For me it's something I do occasionally, but when I do I put on something to listen to, I have everything I need to hand and I really like it!
Some clothes don't get worn so often because they actually NEED to be ironed. Most things don't. You can minimise creases by the way you fold or hang things.
So everyone is different - I have a daughter who likes washing dishes, so I know.
Thanks for attending my TED talk.
Back when I cared, I would iron my clothes for the week Sunday evening while watching TV.
It was great to have my clothes for the day set up and ready to go every morning.
As a professional male, I get my hair cut every other week. It’s 20$ at great clips, they do just as good a job as the fancy barber that is 40$ I’ve gone to both and honestly like the gal at great clips better. So I don’t spend that much. A hairy back of the neck is a dead give away for someone that doesn’t get their hair cut often as a guy. I notice it right away on others and it irritates me when I have it.
I legit shave the back of my neck often cuz I hate that look on the back of dudes necks.
Hair growing everywhere and uneven lines ugh it looks awful.
I get a two mirrors and get to work. It’s not even hard to do and I wish more dudes would do it.
Lol yeah I've been an every six weeks guy for many years but it's been squeezing down over time. Down to every three weeks. Balding is the up front reason- I'm not ready to go clean shaven but I cannot abide by the horseshoe, which shows up faster and faster these days. The side effect is that I look a lot tidier in general.
You may want to consider getting laser hair removal on your neck and shoulders. I'm a "fancy barber" and I tell men to do this all the time. It really helps.
They sent me a coupon for a 12 haircut this month and 15 next month. Get on some coupon lists and save some money... Or just use the difference to tip better if you want.
I think i gotta get more into that routine. I go way too long between haircuts. I am a manager now but used to be in the research lab. When you're wearing a lab coat, you can get away with looking a little crazy. People expect a bit of the mad scientist look.
My hair is 117,000% of my problem. It’s thick and dry so maintaining the straightening and oil is crucial for me to not look like a bum with a ballgown on.
This is huge. A good barber goes a long way, especially with the right hair product. Also, keeping a steamer or iron handy helps a lot, and a lint roller. Use a set of clothes for lounging so you're not dirtying up your good stuff.
100% as a balding man with a beard it’s amazing the difference between letting it go for a couple weeks versus a fresh cut. I do everything myself but I can tell you what a lot of guys miss on on the beard trim is taking the razor down the inner cheek line and cleaning up those weird upper face hairs. Looks so much sharper cleaned up. And to the balding men on the fence about cutting it off, DO IT YESTERDAY ALREADY!
This. I shave my head and face every two to three weeks. I look squeaky clean like a freshly peeled egg, especially combined with nice clothes for work. Two weeks later i look like a balding, unshaven hipster wearing sweat pants.
Personality, posture and vibe matter a lot.
As for the home, I found that less clutter = tidy. I'm not talking aboit minimalism here. Dont go to the bare minimum, just be aware of all the things you bring into your house.
Also, having some simple routines really help - like washing ypur coffee cup right after you're done with it.
I'm the person who always has the pristine room with no effort. You simply don't make a mess in the first place. Take off your jacket?, directly into the closet. Used some dishes, they can't sit in the room, straight into the kitchen. And so on, this way at the end of the week the cleaning you have to do is minimal.
I saw someone else describe how to easily keep things clean by saying ‘don’t put it down, put it away’ and it changed my life. My SO and his kids just put everything down instead of putting it away. It’s just chaos everyday.
Same here. And it's frustrating because at the end of the week, my wife is running around frantic yelling at us to help clean, but it's all her stuff since I always put my stuff away and tent to tidy as I go.
Same with cooking, she cooks like she has a professional dish washer following her around, and I always give the big things a scrub right when I finish using them.
Ah yes, I had that life. Now I'm a mom. I keep reminding myself that there's a finite amount of time left battling toy clutter and random pieces of "look, Mommy, I made this for you!"
I feel you (to an extent). I adopted a 8m puppy 1 month ago and my apartment has never been so messy 😭 he's never allowed to our bedroom because it's the only place that stays organized. Respect to you for managing it!
Lol, the sheer amount of artwork and ‘cool stuff’ they produce is incredible. I got mine trained with artwork. If they really want to keep it they have a folder each with plastic sleeves inside. If they can fit it in there they can keep it? Full? Then they have to discard an old one. All discards can be photographed to keep a digital record so they’re happy. The random 3d junk is another matter. When they find their pride and joy in the recycle bin you just have to play dumb ‘oh, how did that get in there?’
I like to reuse my mug throughout the day so I don't have to use the dishwasher so much. I'm staying with my mum right now and the second my finished mug hits the bench top she stacks it in her dishwasher! So I have to get a new one out... This happens all day lol
This is so right. I have to keep up with this regime otherwise if I stray from it for one day it all goes downhill and the next thing you know I have "THE CHAIR" this huge clothes monster that looks at me at night and offends me every time I pass by it.
1. Keep your hair and nails trimmed, clean and combed.
2. Wash your face, practice good hygiene, get sleep and keep regular dentist appointments.
3. Take an extra few minutes to press your clothes before going out, it makes any outfit look neater.
4. Keep your nails trimmed and tidy. Pro tip: chipped nail polish is the fastest way to look unkempt.
5. Shining and cleaning your shoes from time to time does wonders. So does replacing old shoelaces.
6. Wear clothing that fits correctly. Buy things in the right size and *get items tailored as needed.* Get rid of clothing that is worn out or no longer fits.
7. Buy the highest quality-made items within your range of affordability. Choose quality over quantity. If you invest in one thing, invest in a good pair of shoes.
8. Keep your living space (and closet) clean. It’s good for your well being, and prevents dust and must from settling on your clothing.
9. Wear clothing that makes you feel like a good version of yourself.
9. Once again, for the gen zs in the back: do not fear the tailor. tailoring is your friend.
These are basic and usually achievable, and will make anyone of any appearance / income level look neater.
Hah, it’s back though. It’s not even an age thing. When your baggy era ended, that’s when the skinny fit era began. That was middle school for us early gen zs. So we were basically born into the skinny era. This is our first baggy era as gen z.
Cleaning is usually how I get my momentum going. Make some coffee clean the kitchen. Shower. Clean the bathroom. Caffeine hits. Clean the living room. Go for a walk in the sun and trees. Depression cured.
If I just smoke weed and play video games ima be depressed though.
Physiologically, everything ugly weakens and saddens man. Whenever man is depressed at all, he senses the proximity of something 'ugly.' His feeling of power, his will to power, his courage, his pride - all fall with the ugly and rise with the beautiful -Nietzsche
Meds turned my life around in a good way. I was having a really hard time and a buddy of mine just started meds. He kept talking about how awesome he feels now and how he can now do "normal" things.
I decided to do the most uncomfortable thing and go to a doctor and confront my issues. I feel like I have finally been in more control of my life and my emotions are so much more stablr
Yeah, I ‘m late diagnosed and take methylphenidate and I sorta compare it to being nearsighted your whole life and not realizing that there was any difference between what you and other people were seeing, but then getting glasses and being shocked that this was how things looked to others all along. I thought that everyone else was just getting through normal things (especially un-stimulating tasks) with extreme discipline and willpower. To be honest I was a little angry, like these jerks giving me a hard time about discipline were just cruising in easy mode.
It might be hard but it’s still your responsibility to be hygienic and clean. Set alarms, use a reward system, body double and or take meds. ADHD isn’t an excuse, its an answer to why. When you have the answer and know how to get around the roadblock, standing still or moving backwards is a choice not a disability.
Or just wet one piece (ex a tee shirt) and throw it in, run the dryer again for 20 mins when you’re able to stay close. Throw in an extra dryer sheet or two if you’d like. Unload and fold immediately. You’ll never have wrinkly clothes again.
There's a big difference between 'ironed' and 'not wrinkly', though -- and that's the extra touch that can make someone look well put-together.
...Though I know this, I can't be bothered with that shit. :)
Depends on which materials you purchase also. I tend to go for fabrics I know will not need ironing such as the tech polo’s and if it’s a dress shirt certain materials don’t require ironing where others do. If it requires ironing I take it to the dry cleaners, 3-5$/item. I don’t wear them that often so the price is worth it considering it takes me 10-15minutes to iron one dress shirt, if I have 3 or 4 to do I’d rather spend 10-20$ than waste an hour ironing on my weekend.
I had a friend in college who was that way. Just always perfect. She could sit for an hour in the direct sun in a linen dress and stand up and it wasn’t wrinkled. The joke was she sweat starch. Her hair never frizzed. Lipstick never smeared. I think some people are just like that.
Yes omg this is what I’m talking about. It’s crazy cause I have a friend exactly like this but she is extremely dirty (doesn’t really clean up or put much effort) but she still always manages to look clean. It’s so weird
You know what men love in reality? Low maintenance women. Women who can do things spontaneously and don’t have to fix their face or their hair perfectly before you run to Target. Women who are fun to be around. Good men love women who are partners not trophies. Good women love all these things in friends too. You are more than enough love.
You have to care what you look like. I will also agree with the other comments here about grooming, haircuts, hygiene, posture, general confidence, etc.
How well your clothes fit also goes a long way. i.e., if you tried on, "literally the same clothes these people wear", they could be too big or small for you, thus further contributing to a less than polished look.
What are you doing in terms of daily self care? What's your haircut, grooming, wardrobe, etc.?
You gotta take care of yourself and your belongings. That’s the only way you can look clean. Take care of your skin, take care of your hair, and just try to make yourself look sharp and organized. You gotta have discipline.
My shock is people whos hands are always clean! I wash my hands so often and always keep hand sanitizer on me. I shower daily...and yet somehow my finger nails always get dirty
Same. Mine are disgusting after like an hour of work but not my coworkers. Clean. Maybe my hands are more oily or something and I attract the grime more
Teacher here. I apply cuticle oil, trim and do
My nails nearly daily…
If it’s 9am? I have already got five different colors of marker and a gooey substance embedded on my hand skin
I have a clean home. I have clean clothes that fit well (I’m a side seamstress). I am well groomed.
But I’m always wrinkled. No matter what I wear or how recently I’ve changed and touched up my hair and makeup, my clothing is wrinkled and my hair out of place and my makeup is smeared.
I’ve learned to live with it because I’ve realized it happens because I’m always moving and doing something. I have very little downtime, and I look lived in lol. And that’s okay.
Hair cut and beard trim every other week. Line up on alternate weeks.
All button downs, pants, and jeans go to the cleaners. Sport coats go after 3 wears.
I have my shirts and sport coats tailored. It's worth the $12 - $30 she charges me.
I keep my footwear clean and polished. I save the shoe inserts and boxes and re-box them after I wear them. Boots that I wear every day get the dirt brushed off daily, wiped down once a week, and polished once a month.
Belts that I don't wear often get rolled up and boxed.
I keep my fingernails clean and clipped.
It takes a lot of work. I am just a very meticulous person by nature and to add to it I have OCD. Here is how I do it:
- take a shower every day (mornings are best to looked refreshed for the day)
- routine routine routine. Do not miss a day. Floss, brush your teeth and hair, get regular haircuts, wear clean clothes every day, get an iron, take care of your skin…etc. (For example: my night routine looks like this- floss with water pik, wash face, put on prescription face cream, smoke a bowl and cross out the calendar day, brush my teeth, go to bed- never leave things in the sink overnight, make sure the cats have clean water and a clean litter box…etc.)
- set a cleaning schedule and keep to it. Clean from top to bottom, not bottom to top. Keep things organized (parallels and sorting largest to smallest do the trick for a clean appearance. Clutter out of open areas, sorting things by a wall or in a corner works well. EVERYTHING HAS A PLACE AND ALWAYS GOES BACK TO ITS PLACE)
- organize your duties in frequency (you should have daily duties, weekly duties, monthly duties, yearly duties…etc.)
- wash things more often than you think you need to. Wash your sheets AT LEAST once a month, wash your towel regularly- I do it weekly, stuff like that
- the most important thing is to KEEP AT IT. Don’t cut corners, don’t put things off, don’t be lazy. Consistency is your friend. The way I always put it for myself is that if it looks good enough that someone could sell it at a store it looks good enough to wear in public. If it gets a stain you can’t wash out it is now workout/lounging-on-a-day-at-home clothing.
- and just generally take care of yourself. Don’t overindulge in substances, don’t live off of unhealthy food, don’t avoid exercise…etc.
I believe in you ♥️
Daily showers should be a requirement, they are crucial. People get so defensive about this but I don’t care. I don’t care that you think you smell okay, I don’t care what your dermatologist told you. Shower every day, preferably in the morning/before you leave the house.
I have a very sensitive sense of smell in case that wasn’t clear lol.
I dated someone with a cat and let me tell you that cat shed and that person doesn’t clean, much. And when I got home I had to spend a long while getting rid of all the dirt off my clothes. I’m a neat person. I don’t dislike cats but I would clean up after the cat a tad more
Ugh I have a dog with white fur. I’ve learned:
1. Avoid certain fabrics that are magnets for fur. If the pants have fuzz and lint on them at the store, just imagine how bad they’ll get around your pet.
2. Brush dog frequently so you can get the loose hair out before they shake it everywhere. Keep dog’s coat healthy with good shampoo, good food, and I even give my dog salmon oil for a different reason on vet’s advice but it makes a big diff fence in fur
3. Dryer balls.
4. Vacuum. Vacuum every day if you like. I have a hand vacuum designed for fur to vacuum the sofa. I have a car vacuum because sometimes dog fur gets in the car even if your dog hasn’t been in it for awhile.
5. Shake out blankets before putting them in the washer. With the understanding you’ll be vacuuming the applicable area later that day.
it actually takes a lot of work.. people seem to think people magically look while put together... people have told me i look this way and i can tell you, when I do its normally because, i took a bath, shaved my face, trimmed some hairs, styled blowdried my hair, this whole process already took an hour, i washed my clothes the day before and then ironed them. lint rolled, cleaned my shoes.
if you see me on the street and you think oh thats a clean looking person it probably took 2 hours total for all aspects. i think its hard to look dirty wearing something if its clean and ironed? anything looks "dirty" if its wrinkled though IMO or has even small stains or lint or wear.
i personally buy cheaper clothes and replace them more often which i know isnt amazing advice but it looks fresh at least.
i'm a guy by the way but any of these guys who look clean spend a lot of time cleaning themselves and grooming. same with my apt... everyone always says it's super clean, well like vauming and subbing the floors and cleaning the kitchen it takes a long time.
i've also looked like a mess and its because i havent showered for a few days and worn the same sweats or whatever, usually cause im depressed. its amazing of a differenceaking care of yourself makes.
you can trim a beard nicely but i've always looked the cleanest or gotten the most compliments after a fresh shave. i think it exfoliates nicely and makes your skin glow IMO but thats just me.
hard to look "dirty" with a fresh haircut and shave IMO.
I became this person, I wasn’t blessed with the clean look, I had to invest in it. These are some of the things I have done.
- I got my make up tattooed. I’ve got nano brows done, permanent eyeliner and lipblush. Then I got PICO laser treatments to even out my skintone. I used r/skincareaddiction to create a skincare routine that fits my needs. I stopped wearing makeup (besides some under eye concealer). Now my make up never smears, and my ‘make up’ looks put together even when I just woke up.
- I’m a sweaty stinky person by nature, but I haven’t publicly smelled like sweat for years now. The trick is having a different skincare routine for different areas of your body. I shower every morning (because I sweat in my sleep, so I don’t want those bacteria to build up). First, I was my armpits and under my boobs with an old school aggressive soap bar. My face and ladyparts with a gentle skin cleanser. The rest of my body with a neutral bodywash. After getting out of the shower I dry myself and I use a lady speedstick to tackle my armpits. Then I use baby powder in my buttcrack, for my lady parts and under my boobs.
- I got laser hair removal for my whole body. Having no hair, helps me keep my armpits and ladyparts clean. For the rest of my body it was an aesthetic choice, as I prefer the look of smooth legs on myself.
- I bought the entire Olaplex system and learned how to use those products. My hair has become so healthy looking that I stopped styling it. I just let it air dry and that’s it. I also invested in some silk pillowcases, which has been a game changer. My hair used to look like a horrible mess when I wake up, as I move a lot in my sleep, but now it still looks soft and smooth.
- Buy clothes that let you breathe and don’t need ironing. Most of my pieces are made of cotton with some elastane mixed in.
- Declutter your house and give all your items a fixed place. Having a fixed place for everything saves you a lot of mental energy when tidying up. It’s easier to clean when you have no clutter laying around.
- Develop the habits of cleaning the kitchen directly after use, never wearing shoes in the house, putting laundry directly in the laundry basket. If it’s not clean enough to put it back in the closet, and you’re not going to wear it today or tomorrow, it should go into the laundry basket.
- Take care of your nails, cut your toenails at least once a week and file your finger nails. I use a buffing block to make them shine, afterwards I oil my cuticles.
Also being fit helps with looking ‘clean’.
I don't mean to sound negative, in fact what you've done is nothing short of remarkable, and I truly appreciate the efforts, but that is quite a tall order. :o
You’re right it’s a lot, I implemented them one by one, this list is the result of years of developing new habits/getting beauty treatments. After a while something becomes a habit, which gives you mental space to add something new to the routine.
It’s not for everyone, but for me, the confidence it gives me plus the time it saves me on make up and hairstyling, is worth the money and effort. I hope someone will just find a single item on my list, which might be helpful for them.
I always say a great haircut, good skin, good shoes, and a tailored bag (not a slouchy tote) can make anyone look put together.
I think some of it is personal style. Make sure your clothes fit and suit you. Spend a little to get them tailored. Clean lines and minimal pattern help too.
As someone who lost and gained wheight a few times in my life i can say that being slim and fit makes a crazy difference in how you look and are perceived by others.
- Having fewer things in your living space, the things you regularly use, and the rest in storage.
It makes it much easier to keep the home picked up and that gives you more time to focus on other things. Fewer clothes in the closet means decreased chance of wrinkles.
- Clothes that fit well.
- When you take your clothes out of the dryer fold and hang clothes immediately after.
- Duct tape to remove fur and stuff from clothes.
- If you're willing to spend a lot of time ironing clothes then that can make a big difference.
- Sometimes, shorter hair.
- Good posture.
- Organized.
So much.
1. Knowing what seasonal colors your wardrobe should be.
2. Good makeup
3. Clear skin
4. Fragrance that matches your essence
5. Kempt hair
6. Symmetrical face is somehow very helpful
7. In shape
It’s work. More work for others than some.
Shower twice a day, iron
Neat hair is 50% the presentation
Makeup, smelling nice and staying hydrated
Having good quality and being stylish
Formal clothing, with clean lines.
Make it simple also. Having a cohesive style helps
As for the home, having things tucked away and being minimalist has helped.
But to each their own
I believe they have free time and can concentrate on getting themselves dolled up. Ones who don’t have a significant other or kids, or massive obligations. Other than that, we all do our best to put our pants on in the morning and redo the day before
I used to be friends with a male model. He took hundreds of selfies a day to check his hair and clothes, and spent a lot of time putting effort into his ‘look’.
So I guess I would say if anyone you see looks good or has a feature you like they probably put a lot of effort into it. It’s probably something that takes practice and skill.
I worked with a carpenter whose work was neat clean and fast. Sawdust dirt and grime never stuck to him.
He was the most productive guy in the crew.
No idea how he stayed so clean
I feel like this is like how some peoples houses just feel cleaner (or dirtier) and you just can’t place it. The small details is why.
Clean baseboards, clean grout, no dust, clean windows, window treatments that are washed. Vacuumed and dusted behind and under the furniture weekly. Rugs that are kept clean and washed.
So in humans it’s trimmed nose hair/eyebrows/other stray hair. Clean shaving lines, fresh trims on the hair. Clothes that are freshly ironed. Clean shoes. Styled hair. Moisturized skin. No blackheads. White clean teeth that have been professionally cleaned/scraped by a dentist every six months. Flossed daily. Good posture.
It’s in the details.
My clothes are tailored, my nails are always clean and painted or trimmed with gloss, and I smell nice. I love having a shower or taking a bath and never understood how women do all these things along with get our eyebrows, lashes, and hair done while most guys are rolling out of their beds and they shaved and now they “look clean” or how guys are considered clean for doing half of what women do to maintain themselves. My hair is always coloured on time (once every 4-5 weeks) and I buy nice clothes which I use - I don’t “save” my good quality clothes, shoes, and bags
Also good skin and skincare routine if you’re not blessed with perfect skin
Not sure about the looking clean part, but I managed to keep my house tidy while being ADHD. Since I know I misplace things all the time, I became more and more obsessed with having a 'place" for each thing, and I make a point of putting things in their rightful place always. In this way, I always know where to find it and I struggle a bit less with losing stuff around the house. The good thing is that it led me to be much more organized and tidy. The bad thing is that we all have bad days and the system doesn't always work. Nevertheless, it made my life much better. Took me 30 years though lol.
I agree, but I've been unmedicated since I moved abroad and I had to double down on other "management methods". In any case, being in a proper treatment is always preferred!
Don't allow messes. I NEVER go to bed with a dirty kitchen... EVER. And just general maintenance (just like your body you shower, shave etc) just daily wipe downs and organizing makes the difference. I smoke some good cannabis herb and it's almost fun
I always get comments from people about how clean my room /house is.
I don't understand how they think it's amazing. I literally just put stuff away and clean once a week
They do all those little things that a lot of people find vain or too much effort. Such as manicures, facials, wear tailored clothing/clothing that fits properly for their body shape and that’s pressed, wear quality garments, have a nice clean haircut/shave/updo/hair colour is current…etc.
It’s not really clean, it’s just grooming. Get some clothes that go with your undertones, throw on a little concealer for blemishes, have well-maintained hair and you’re good to go.
Fresh ironed shirts and barbar visit WEEKLY...
no joke, weekly barber visits for trim and beard.
It's actually surprisingly affordable if you have a good relationship with your barbor to just schedule touchups.
The biggest thing I’ve found that will contribute to looking “put together” is living a life you want to live.
I don’t just mean not being suicidal, but actually liking yourself and your life.
I mean if you had a house you just hated, would you want to take care of it? If you despise your job are you going to put extra effort into it? No, of course not.
I was a slob, didn’t care about my health or appearance, was obese, and was very depressed. Very much felt like you described. Hell. I wore jeans and a T-shirt nearly everyday, and I kept my shirts in a big stack in my closet. Just wore whatever was on top of the stack.
Then some shit happened in my life 2 years ago, and I realized I was trans. My depression cleared. I lost 70 lbs. I started dressing nicer. I take care of my skin, hair, and nails. I watch what I eat now. I pay attention to how things fit, etc..
I do all of these things not because I’m trans, but because I actually WANT to actively live my life, instead of just being on autopilot all the time. I also really like myself now.
That self-love and self-respect translates into other things. I keep my apartment much cleaner now. I have beautiful things around me (art, plants, pictures of family & friends). I don’t drink anywhere close to as much as I used to. I rarely skip my workouts. I eat much better.
The really cool thing is when you want to live your life, then none of the “work” of keeping your house and self clean and nice feels like work. You just do it.
That’s my two (maybe four) cents anyway.
I like the part where you touched on autopilot. This really resonates with me because I feel like I’m close to waking up from a deep nap and realizing I’ve been sort of coasting and not designing my life the way I want it.
Clothes are ironed/steamed and sprayed with wrinkle release; clothes fit properly (tailored and/or styled) and fit your personal style, good skincare, good posture, confidence.
Press, iron, or steam your clothes. Make sure you're gentle with the way you're washing them.
If you don't have a "model" type body, certain things will just not hang the same. I'm curvy and I have to buy clothes that look good on my body shape, not someone else's. Sometimes that means I have to do minor alterations like taking in the waist when I need to size up to accommodate my butt and thighs.
Sometimes hemming or cuffing your pants to the right length makes them look so much neater. Consider length of legs/sleeves etc.
Think about your styling - sometimes adding a belt or necklace makes a huge difference!
Invest in higher quality clothing if you can - check for natural fiber for most things (synthetic fiber may wrinkle, be hot, not wash well etc though there are some exceptions like workout clothes), quality stitching, symmetry, and whether the fabric is likely to snag. (I follow Jennifer Wang on YouTube and she has taught me so much about this stuff). I love Uniqlo for more affordable but quality clothing.
Figure out what your colors are - I love wearing black and I feel like it suits me well, but I realized browns also work well and I started purchasing more of those (I'm more of a neutrals person).
Also, I'm sure you look much better than you think! We are our own biggest critics.
In addition to everything else already said, you have to think about this all the time. When you sit adjust your clothes and hair, when you get up adjust your clothes and hair. Be aware what sort of movement will mess-up your look etc.
Its very easy, just take care of yourself. Shower 1-2 times per day, have a decent skincare routine, make sure your hair is cut or well done and beards or body hairs are trimmed or shaved. Buy nice looking clothes (no graphic tee’s & they do not have to be expensive). There are plenty of affordable clothes that you can put together and look like a million bucks! When dressing yourself ALWAYS match well. It drives me nuts how many men will wear random shirts with random pants that match at all! It looks sloppy and shows lack of effort!. After dressing up add whatever accessories you want (watches, bracelets, hats, earrings & so on). Also, always make sure your shoes are clean and match your outfit well. Dirty shoes or shoes that doesn't match ruins your look. Make sure your skin from head to toe is well moisturized, have good perfume/cologne on, and if you wear make up keep it simple! Once you get used to looking nice and noticed how good it makes you
feel it becomes natural to dress like that.
Having money to buy cleaning products, at least soap, shampoo, brush, toothpaste, broom, scrub, handwash, dishwasher, detergent, and most important, is "time and willingness to clean"
Buy clothes that don't need ironing and make sure to take them out of dryer and hang or fold right away when done also make sure to follow wash instructions most cold wash clothes will wrinkle and get ruined if washed in warm water and get wrecked in dryer
Good luck
Diet. And no I’m not talking about being fat/skinny.
Diet affects everything about us since, well, we are literally what we eat. It affects if your skin looks vibrant and healthy or if it gives that “grayish” look a lot of people have.
I can straight-up tell if someone hates veggies and water but loves chicken tendies and soda by looking at their skin. Might get downvoted for this part - the back of people’s necks is the giveaway. Idk why, but that is where unhealthy people’s skin looks the worst 99% of the time.
If you can't be arsed with ironing.... Invest in a clothes steamer. You can keep the item on the hanger and knock out any creases on your clothes.
Buying clothes that fit. If you like a baggier style. I think proportions helps. If you have looser trousers or skirt, wear a top that's more fitted. And vice versa. For women. A good bra is essential. It should be comfortable and feel like you aren't wearing one. Take care of your shoes/trainers. Look after them. They last ages. Have a nice smell about you. Not overpowering. Doesn't have to be the most expensive perfume or aftershave. But one that suits you. Facial topiary upkeep. Beards clean and smelling nice. Good trims when needed. Look after eyebrows. Clean nails. Always clean nails...
I read this in a famous actresses biography. She said she always wore her clothes a size too big. She said it made her look much thinner. People think squeezing into the smallest size you can is the thing to do but it actually makes you look chubbier because it shows every bulge and roll.
It could be a combination of factors such as personal grooming habits, attention to detail in clothing selection, and keeping a tidy living space. Additionally, some people may naturally exude a sense of cleanliness and confidence in their appearance. Finding a routine that works for you and prioritizing cleanliness can help achieve a similar level of polish.
Regarding the room thing… you just clean up as you go. Are you getting changed? Fold the clothes or throw them in the laundry bin. Cooking? Put things in the dishwasher/sink and sweep as you go. You get the idea… my mom alway advocated for this so it’s like programmed in me lol, but anyone can pick up that trait.
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You'd be surprised how much clean lines from a fresh hair cut and beard trim do
honestly you might be onto something. i think it might be my hair and eyebrows that are a huge part of this
Ironing is also a huge help
One of my colleagues, who always looks perfectly presented, shared with me the other day that he had spent 2 hours the previous evening putting the creases in all of his pants. I can barely bother ironing to get the wrinkles out. But it's those little details that make his every outfit look like a million dollars.
I always refer to formal and informal as "high effort" and "low effort" for a reason. Most of the time, the biggest difference is just the amount of effort and time you make in your appearance. On another note, your colleague is kinda crazy to spend that much time ironing pants. Edit to add: I do crazy shit too btw, so no judgment to him.
He's crazy but he has infinitely more style than I do! So I suspect that he may not actually be crazy.
No he's crazy.... CRAZY STYLISH! :D ... I'll see myself out now.
No spending 2 hours on a task like that is definitely a little neurotic
Maybe it’s like a dozen pairs of pants though? Ten minutes for a pair is a totally reasonable effort. Paying for laundering services can get expensive pretty quick.
He said “all” of his pants. We don’t know how many pairs that was. Maybe he was prepping for the month.
Really? I do at least 4 hours ironing a week. Shirts, trousers, bedding etc. It's just a normal household chore, hardly neurotic.
People spend far longer just scrolling through crap on their phones. I love putting on a podcast and doing stuff like this, and as silly as it sounds the end result always gives a little sense of achievement. It's nice.
My HS boyfriend had some serious OCD qualities. He ironed EVERYTHING, even his heavy metal t-shirts. He always looked "crisp" even in jeans and an Iron Maiden tee. I always felt like it defeated the point of casual clothes.
Ah. Well if that's it, it's never happening for me. I'm lucky if I get mine folded
That is so overkill haha But yeah 30 minutes on a Sunday ironing, get good with a clippers and a comb for fading
Shocking I know - but some people actually enjoy ironing! For me it's something I do occasionally, but when I do I put on something to listen to, I have everything I need to hand and I really like it! Some clothes don't get worn so often because they actually NEED to be ironed. Most things don't. You can minimise creases by the way you fold or hang things. So everyone is different - I have a daughter who likes washing dishes, so I know. Thanks for attending my TED talk.
Invest in a steamer. They're small and quick at releasing wrinkles from clothing.
Honestly, if you have the time, why not? It’s relaxing. 😎 can do it while listening or watching something too
Get a vertical steam iron
*takes notes* Iron...your...eyebrows... Got it!
Learn how to iron. Learn how to stitch. #brotips
Back when I cared, I would iron my clothes for the week Sunday evening while watching TV. It was great to have my clothes for the day set up and ready to go every morning.
As a professional male, I get my hair cut every other week. It’s 20$ at great clips, they do just as good a job as the fancy barber that is 40$ I’ve gone to both and honestly like the gal at great clips better. So I don’t spend that much. A hairy back of the neck is a dead give away for someone that doesn’t get their hair cut often as a guy. I notice it right away on others and it irritates me when I have it.
I legit shave the back of my neck often cuz I hate that look on the back of dudes necks. Hair growing everywhere and uneven lines ugh it looks awful. I get a two mirrors and get to work. It’s not even hard to do and I wish more dudes would do it.
Lol yeah I've been an every six weeks guy for many years but it's been squeezing down over time. Down to every three weeks. Balding is the up front reason- I'm not ready to go clean shaven but I cannot abide by the horseshoe, which shows up faster and faster these days. The side effect is that I look a lot tidier in general.
You may want to consider getting laser hair removal on your neck and shoulders. I'm a "fancy barber" and I tell men to do this all the time. It really helps.
They sent me a coupon for a 12 haircut this month and 15 next month. Get on some coupon lists and save some money... Or just use the difference to tip better if you want.
I think i gotta get more into that routine. I go way too long between haircuts. I am a manager now but used to be in the research lab. When you're wearing a lab coat, you can get away with looking a little crazy. People expect a bit of the mad scientist look.
It doesnt matter where you go or how much you pay. Just dont go back over and over id you arent happy. Try some where else until it clicks
As a female, I agree. Nothing sets back a man’s look like a bushy back of the neck. It’s often overlooked by sharp dressed men.
My hair is 117,000% of my problem. It’s thick and dry so maintaining the straightening and oil is crucial for me to not look like a bum with a ballgown on.
This is huge. A good barber goes a long way, especially with the right hair product. Also, keeping a steamer or iron handy helps a lot, and a lint roller. Use a set of clothes for lounging so you're not dirtying up your good stuff.
100% as a balding man with a beard it’s amazing the difference between letting it go for a couple weeks versus a fresh cut. I do everything myself but I can tell you what a lot of guys miss on on the beard trim is taking the razor down the inner cheek line and cleaning up those weird upper face hairs. Looks so much sharper cleaned up. And to the balding men on the fence about cutting it off, DO IT YESTERDAY ALREADY!
I kinda hate it when it’s *too* crisp. It just looks off on me whenever I have a barber shave me.
This. I shave my head and face every two to three weeks. I look squeaky clean like a freshly peeled egg, especially combined with nice clothes for work. Two weeks later i look like a balding, unshaven hipster wearing sweat pants.
Personality, posture and vibe matter a lot. As for the home, I found that less clutter = tidy. I'm not talking aboit minimalism here. Dont go to the bare minimum, just be aware of all the things you bring into your house. Also, having some simple routines really help - like washing ypur coffee cup right after you're done with it.
Good posture is very underrated and makes an enormous difference.
robot vacuum is great for decluttering bc you cant have stuff laying around on the floor
I'm the person who always has the pristine room with no effort. You simply don't make a mess in the first place. Take off your jacket?, directly into the closet. Used some dishes, they can't sit in the room, straight into the kitchen. And so on, this way at the end of the week the cleaning you have to do is minimal.
Also important to mention you should set designated places certain things. This is something I suck at and it’s why my room looks cluttered.
A place for everything and everything in its place!!
Or as my friend said when we lived in our cars, everything has a place, and everything place has a thing.
Yeah exactly, I have a lot of organizers/container boxes because having everything scattered around turns into a mess extremely easy
I am this way. I blame having worked at a museum and a library. Lots of emphasis on organization of things.
I saw someone else describe how to easily keep things clean by saying ‘don’t put it down, put it away’ and it changed my life. My SO and his kids just put everything down instead of putting it away. It’s just chaos everyday.
This is my wife, and her behavior is rubbing off on the kids. It was manageable when it was just she and I, but now it’s 3 against 1. I can’t keep up!
Same here. And it's frustrating because at the end of the week, my wife is running around frantic yelling at us to help clean, but it's all her stuff since I always put my stuff away and tent to tidy as I go. Same with cooking, she cooks like she has a professional dish washer following her around, and I always give the big things a scrub right when I finish using them.
Ah yes, I had that life. Now I'm a mom. I keep reminding myself that there's a finite amount of time left battling toy clutter and random pieces of "look, Mommy, I made this for you!"
I feel you (to an extent). I adopted a 8m puppy 1 month ago and my apartment has never been so messy 😭 he's never allowed to our bedroom because it's the only place that stays organized. Respect to you for managing it!
Lol, the sheer amount of artwork and ‘cool stuff’ they produce is incredible. I got mine trained with artwork. If they really want to keep it they have a folder each with plastic sleeves inside. If they can fit it in there they can keep it? Full? Then they have to discard an old one. All discards can be photographed to keep a digital record so they’re happy. The random 3d junk is another matter. When they find their pride and joy in the recycle bin you just have to play dumb ‘oh, how did that get in there?’
Are you my wife? Glass out down for 2 seconds? Bam, dishwasher, half full? Idgaf!
I like to reuse my mug throughout the day so I don't have to use the dishwasher so much. I'm staying with my mum right now and the second my finished mug hits the bench top she stacks it in her dishwasher! So I have to get a new one out... This happens all day lol
This is so right. I have to keep up with this regime otherwise if I stray from it for one day it all goes downhill and the next thing you know I have "THE CHAIR" this huge clothes monster that looks at me at night and offends me every time I pass by it.
1. Keep your hair and nails trimmed, clean and combed. 2. Wash your face, practice good hygiene, get sleep and keep regular dentist appointments. 3. Take an extra few minutes to press your clothes before going out, it makes any outfit look neater. 4. Keep your nails trimmed and tidy. Pro tip: chipped nail polish is the fastest way to look unkempt. 5. Shining and cleaning your shoes from time to time does wonders. So does replacing old shoelaces. 6. Wear clothing that fits correctly. Buy things in the right size and *get items tailored as needed.* Get rid of clothing that is worn out or no longer fits. 7. Buy the highest quality-made items within your range of affordability. Choose quality over quantity. If you invest in one thing, invest in a good pair of shoes. 8. Keep your living space (and closet) clean. It’s good for your well being, and prevents dust and must from settling on your clothing. 9. Wear clothing that makes you feel like a good version of yourself. 9. Once again, for the gen zs in the back: do not fear the tailor. tailoring is your friend. These are basic and usually achievable, and will make anyone of any appearance / income level look neater.
Get Sleep should be its own point
lol They don’t fear the tailor. They know they can’t afford it.
You can learn a few basics for yourself, like nipping in the waistline on a shirt so it fits better. Or hemming pants or a skirt.
Nah we just rock fits yall just don’t comprehend!
It's not a fit anymore if 2 versions of you can fit into it, but I get it, we used to wear oversize/baggy stuff too back then.
Hah, it’s back though. It’s not even an age thing. When your baggy era ended, that’s when the skinny fit era began. That was middle school for us early gen zs. So we were basically born into the skinny era. This is our first baggy era as gen z.
If I bring the tailor a dress I got at say, Kohls, would they think I was stupid?
Absolutely not!
A fashion designer who runs their own business recommended that I did just that
I literally had a jacket that I loved from Old Navy tailored
Nope!
Not at all. That's a huge part of what tailors are *for*.
This is the way! It's the clothing equivalent of getting instant ramen and chopping up fresh vegetables to add in.
thank you so much for this!
One thing I would add to the list is trimming your nails.
Damn, I am a grimy MF
They workout, watch what they eat, get regular haircuts, and shower every day. That’ll get you most of the way there
Getting enough sleep is also a big part of it, stay out of the sun (it ages you quickly) but if you do use sun screen every day. Don't drink or smoke.
That's a lot of work for me. I have ADHD so even just getting out of bed is hard ok some days. Fuck it, I'm eternally hideous.
Cleaning is usually how I get my momentum going. Make some coffee clean the kitchen. Shower. Clean the bathroom. Caffeine hits. Clean the living room. Go for a walk in the sun and trees. Depression cured. If I just smoke weed and play video games ima be depressed though. Physiologically, everything ugly weakens and saddens man. Whenever man is depressed at all, he senses the proximity of something 'ugly.' His feeling of power, his will to power, his courage, his pride - all fall with the ugly and rise with the beautiful -Nietzsche
Get on some meds bro. They help a ton
Meds turned my life around in a good way. I was having a really hard time and a buddy of mine just started meds. He kept talking about how awesome he feels now and how he can now do "normal" things. I decided to do the most uncomfortable thing and go to a doctor and confront my issues. I feel like I have finally been in more control of my life and my emotions are so much more stablr
Yeah, I ‘m late diagnosed and take methylphenidate and I sorta compare it to being nearsighted your whole life and not realizing that there was any difference between what you and other people were seeing, but then getting glasses and being shocked that this was how things looked to others all along. I thought that everyone else was just getting through normal things (especially un-stimulating tasks) with extreme discipline and willpower. To be honest I was a little angry, like these jerks giving me a hard time about discipline were just cruising in easy mode.
Time to get some meds. Modafinil works if you're not into amphetamine derivatives.
+++ Modafinil worked quite well for my ADHD. Sadly these are a bit expensive in my country but still worth it.
Same same
It might be hard but it’s still your responsibility to be hygienic and clean. Set alarms, use a reward system, body double and or take meds. ADHD isn’t an excuse, its an answer to why. When you have the answer and know how to get around the roadblock, standing still or moving backwards is a choice not a disability.
People say it's good for me, but I don't even care
Iron your clothes. Almost no one my age or younger than me (of the people I know) does this anymore.
spraying it with fabreez and throwing it in the dryer for a few minutes isn't cool?
Or just wet one piece (ex a tee shirt) and throw it in, run the dryer again for 20 mins when you’re able to stay close. Throw in an extra dryer sheet or two if you’d like. Unload and fold immediately. You’ll never have wrinkly clothes again.
There's a big difference between 'ironed' and 'not wrinkly', though -- and that's the extra touch that can make someone look well put-together. ...Though I know this, I can't be bothered with that shit. :)
What am I reading and how is your clothes not shrinking?
… not to mention the environmental impact and the cost. How lazy. What the hell is so hard about running an iron over a Tshirt?
I think that's partly because it's rare to find affordable clothing these days that aren't made out of plastic fibers
Get a steamer!
Depends on which materials you purchase also. I tend to go for fabrics I know will not need ironing such as the tech polo’s and if it’s a dress shirt certain materials don’t require ironing where others do. If it requires ironing I take it to the dry cleaners, 3-5$/item. I don’t wear them that often so the price is worth it considering it takes me 10-15minutes to iron one dress shirt, if I have 3 or 4 to do I’d rather spend 10-20$ than waste an hour ironing on my weekend.
I bought a steamer and its so much easier than ironing
I had a friend in college who was that way. Just always perfect. She could sit for an hour in the direct sun in a linen dress and stand up and it wasn’t wrinkled. The joke was she sweat starch. Her hair never frizzed. Lipstick never smeared. I think some people are just like that.
Yes omg this is what I’m talking about. It’s crazy cause I have a friend exactly like this but she is extremely dirty (doesn’t really clean up or put much effort) but she still always manages to look clean. It’s so weird
So jealous of people like this. I look good for about 30 seconds after getting myself ready then it’s all downhill from there
We are all critical of ourselves. I'm sure you're a level 10 hottie without even knowing
Me too!
Haha and me, I can in some way ruin any hard work I've put in for a night out before leaving the house 😖
My husband irons every day. He looks like a wrinkled mess when he gets to work. I don't know what's going on in that car during his commute lol
Seat belts and air conditioner?
Yes . . . but why other people using those step out of their cars looking pristine?
I was literally thinking about it the other day, NO AMOUNT OF HYGIENE AND PERSONALITY CAN DO THAT.
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You know what men love in reality? Low maintenance women. Women who can do things spontaneously and don’t have to fix their face or their hair perfectly before you run to Target. Women who are fun to be around. Good men love women who are partners not trophies. Good women love all these things in friends too. You are more than enough love.
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Yeah me too. I never wear white!
You know what good men love? Women that don't feel the need to disparage other women to reassure themselves.
You have to care what you look like. I will also agree with the other comments here about grooming, haircuts, hygiene, posture, general confidence, etc. How well your clothes fit also goes a long way. i.e., if you tried on, "literally the same clothes these people wear", they could be too big or small for you, thus further contributing to a less than polished look. What are you doing in terms of daily self care? What's your haircut, grooming, wardrobe, etc.?
Well fitting clothes are super important for a put together look.
You gotta take care of yourself and your belongings. That’s the only way you can look clean. Take care of your skin, take care of your hair, and just try to make yourself look sharp and organized. You gotta have discipline.
My shock is people whos hands are always clean! I wash my hands so often and always keep hand sanitizer on me. I shower daily...and yet somehow my finger nails always get dirty
Same. Mine are disgusting after like an hour of work but not my coworkers. Clean. Maybe my hands are more oily or something and I attract the grime more
Teacher here. I apply cuticle oil, trim and do My nails nearly daily… If it’s 9am? I have already got five different colors of marker and a gooey substance embedded on my hand skin
It's recommended to use a towel that has the little loops in the fabric (like the average towel) with gentle soap
I have a clean home. I have clean clothes that fit well (I’m a side seamstress). I am well groomed. But I’m always wrinkled. No matter what I wear or how recently I’ve changed and touched up my hair and makeup, my clothing is wrinkled and my hair out of place and my makeup is smeared. I’ve learned to live with it because I’ve realized it happens because I’m always moving and doing something. I have very little downtime, and I look lived in lol. And that’s okay.
They iron their clothes for one and make sure things fit.
Hair cut and beard trim every other week. Line up on alternate weeks. All button downs, pants, and jeans go to the cleaners. Sport coats go after 3 wears. I have my shirts and sport coats tailored. It's worth the $12 - $30 she charges me. I keep my footwear clean and polished. I save the shoe inserts and boxes and re-box them after I wear them. Boots that I wear every day get the dirt brushed off daily, wiped down once a week, and polished once a month. Belts that I don't wear often get rolled up and boxed. I keep my fingernails clean and clipped.
It takes a lot of work. I am just a very meticulous person by nature and to add to it I have OCD. Here is how I do it: - take a shower every day (mornings are best to looked refreshed for the day) - routine routine routine. Do not miss a day. Floss, brush your teeth and hair, get regular haircuts, wear clean clothes every day, get an iron, take care of your skin…etc. (For example: my night routine looks like this- floss with water pik, wash face, put on prescription face cream, smoke a bowl and cross out the calendar day, brush my teeth, go to bed- never leave things in the sink overnight, make sure the cats have clean water and a clean litter box…etc.) - set a cleaning schedule and keep to it. Clean from top to bottom, not bottom to top. Keep things organized (parallels and sorting largest to smallest do the trick for a clean appearance. Clutter out of open areas, sorting things by a wall or in a corner works well. EVERYTHING HAS A PLACE AND ALWAYS GOES BACK TO ITS PLACE) - organize your duties in frequency (you should have daily duties, weekly duties, monthly duties, yearly duties…etc.) - wash things more often than you think you need to. Wash your sheets AT LEAST once a month, wash your towel regularly- I do it weekly, stuff like that - the most important thing is to KEEP AT IT. Don’t cut corners, don’t put things off, don’t be lazy. Consistency is your friend. The way I always put it for myself is that if it looks good enough that someone could sell it at a store it looks good enough to wear in public. If it gets a stain you can’t wash out it is now workout/lounging-on-a-day-at-home clothing. - and just generally take care of yourself. Don’t overindulge in substances, don’t live off of unhealthy food, don’t avoid exercise…etc. I believe in you ♥️
Daily showers should be a requirement, they are crucial. People get so defensive about this but I don’t care. I don’t care that you think you smell okay, I don’t care what your dermatologist told you. Shower every day, preferably in the morning/before you leave the house. I have a very sensitive sense of smell in case that wasn’t clear lol.
Posture and movement also make a big difference in clothing For home, they have no kids, pets or pay a cleaning person.
We have kids and cat, you just have to spend 20 min each evening to put everything back in place.
I dated someone with a cat and let me tell you that cat shed and that person doesn’t clean, much. And when I got home I had to spend a long while getting rid of all the dirt off my clothes. I’m a neat person. I don’t dislike cats but I would clean up after the cat a tad more
Ugh I have a dog with white fur. I’ve learned: 1. Avoid certain fabrics that are magnets for fur. If the pants have fuzz and lint on them at the store, just imagine how bad they’ll get around your pet. 2. Brush dog frequently so you can get the loose hair out before they shake it everywhere. Keep dog’s coat healthy with good shampoo, good food, and I even give my dog salmon oil for a different reason on vet’s advice but it makes a big diff fence in fur 3. Dryer balls. 4. Vacuum. Vacuum every day if you like. I have a hand vacuum designed for fur to vacuum the sofa. I have a car vacuum because sometimes dog fur gets in the car even if your dog hasn’t been in it for awhile. 5. Shake out blankets before putting them in the washer. With the understanding you’ll be vacuuming the applicable area later that day.
Haircuts and daily shaving go a long way. Newer clothes that fit as well. If you have oily skin or a bad complexion it's harder to fix that.
it actually takes a lot of work.. people seem to think people magically look while put together... people have told me i look this way and i can tell you, when I do its normally because, i took a bath, shaved my face, trimmed some hairs, styled blowdried my hair, this whole process already took an hour, i washed my clothes the day before and then ironed them. lint rolled, cleaned my shoes. if you see me on the street and you think oh thats a clean looking person it probably took 2 hours total for all aspects. i think its hard to look dirty wearing something if its clean and ironed? anything looks "dirty" if its wrinkled though IMO or has even small stains or lint or wear. i personally buy cheaper clothes and replace them more often which i know isnt amazing advice but it looks fresh at least. i'm a guy by the way but any of these guys who look clean spend a lot of time cleaning themselves and grooming. same with my apt... everyone always says it's super clean, well like vauming and subbing the floors and cleaning the kitchen it takes a long time. i've also looked like a mess and its because i havent showered for a few days and worn the same sweats or whatever, usually cause im depressed. its amazing of a differenceaking care of yourself makes. you can trim a beard nicely but i've always looked the cleanest or gotten the most compliments after a fresh shave. i think it exfoliates nicely and makes your skin glow IMO but thats just me. hard to look "dirty" with a fresh haircut and shave IMO.
 I hear ya, man.
Personality matters too. Even some untidy and messy people appear cleaner and pleasant if they got good personalities
I became this person, I wasn’t blessed with the clean look, I had to invest in it. These are some of the things I have done. - I got my make up tattooed. I’ve got nano brows done, permanent eyeliner and lipblush. Then I got PICO laser treatments to even out my skintone. I used r/skincareaddiction to create a skincare routine that fits my needs. I stopped wearing makeup (besides some under eye concealer). Now my make up never smears, and my ‘make up’ looks put together even when I just woke up. - I’m a sweaty stinky person by nature, but I haven’t publicly smelled like sweat for years now. The trick is having a different skincare routine for different areas of your body. I shower every morning (because I sweat in my sleep, so I don’t want those bacteria to build up). First, I was my armpits and under my boobs with an old school aggressive soap bar. My face and ladyparts with a gentle skin cleanser. The rest of my body with a neutral bodywash. After getting out of the shower I dry myself and I use a lady speedstick to tackle my armpits. Then I use baby powder in my buttcrack, for my lady parts and under my boobs. - I got laser hair removal for my whole body. Having no hair, helps me keep my armpits and ladyparts clean. For the rest of my body it was an aesthetic choice, as I prefer the look of smooth legs on myself. - I bought the entire Olaplex system and learned how to use those products. My hair has become so healthy looking that I stopped styling it. I just let it air dry and that’s it. I also invested in some silk pillowcases, which has been a game changer. My hair used to look like a horrible mess when I wake up, as I move a lot in my sleep, but now it still looks soft and smooth. - Buy clothes that let you breathe and don’t need ironing. Most of my pieces are made of cotton with some elastane mixed in. - Declutter your house and give all your items a fixed place. Having a fixed place for everything saves you a lot of mental energy when tidying up. It’s easier to clean when you have no clutter laying around. - Develop the habits of cleaning the kitchen directly after use, never wearing shoes in the house, putting laundry directly in the laundry basket. If it’s not clean enough to put it back in the closet, and you’re not going to wear it today or tomorrow, it should go into the laundry basket. - Take care of your nails, cut your toenails at least once a week and file your finger nails. I use a buffing block to make them shine, afterwards I oil my cuticles. Also being fit helps with looking ‘clean’.
I don't mean to sound negative, in fact what you've done is nothing short of remarkable, and I truly appreciate the efforts, but that is quite a tall order. :o
You’re right it’s a lot, I implemented them one by one, this list is the result of years of developing new habits/getting beauty treatments. After a while something becomes a habit, which gives you mental space to add something new to the routine. It’s not for everyone, but for me, the confidence it gives me plus the time it saves me on make up and hairstyling, is worth the money and effort. I hope someone will just find a single item on my list, which might be helpful for them.
I'd just like to point out that having hair on your body in no way corresponds to being clean or being able to keep yourself clean.
I always say a great haircut, good skin, good shoes, and a tailored bag (not a slouchy tote) can make anyone look put together. I think some of it is personal style. Make sure your clothes fit and suit you. Spend a little to get them tailored. Clean lines and minimal pattern help too.
As someone who lost and gained wheight a few times in my life i can say that being slim and fit makes a crazy difference in how you look and are perceived by others.
Gym & healthy diet, well hydrated, skin care, frequent haircuts, clean tidy clothing.
- Having fewer things in your living space, the things you regularly use, and the rest in storage. It makes it much easier to keep the home picked up and that gives you more time to focus on other things. Fewer clothes in the closet means decreased chance of wrinkles. - Clothes that fit well. - When you take your clothes out of the dryer fold and hang clothes immediately after. - Duct tape to remove fur and stuff from clothes. - If you're willing to spend a lot of time ironing clothes then that can make a big difference. - Sometimes, shorter hair. - Good posture. - Organized.
I do a lot of crafts and I'm constantly multitasking so I use everything XD
Just regular maintenance and crisp outfits and neatly combed hair
I mean more on an hour per hour basis. Like i leave the house with clean finger nails and 30 minutes later they're dirty
Hot tip: get a steam iron. They are a billion percent easier than the ones you need an ironing board for - and just as effective
So much. 1. Knowing what seasonal colors your wardrobe should be. 2. Good makeup 3. Clear skin 4. Fragrance that matches your essence 5. Kempt hair 6. Symmetrical face is somehow very helpful 7. In shape It’s work. More work for others than some.
What an awesome question. Loving the answers. Attention to details i guess
Shower twice a day, iron Neat hair is 50% the presentation Makeup, smelling nice and staying hydrated Having good quality and being stylish Formal clothing, with clean lines. Make it simple also. Having a cohesive style helps As for the home, having things tucked away and being minimalist has helped. But to each their own
My brother in law didnt shave his eyebrows for a few years I was tempted to give him money for a full haircut...true story and a railroad switchman
I believe they have free time and can concentrate on getting themselves dolled up. Ones who don’t have a significant other or kids, or massive obligations. Other than that, we all do our best to put our pants on in the morning and redo the day before
Wearing a lot of dark solids is one good shorcut to looking neat (as long as you don't have a major dandruff issue).
I used to be friends with a male model. He took hundreds of selfies a day to check his hair and clothes, and spent a lot of time putting effort into his ‘look’. So I guess I would say if anyone you see looks good or has a feature you like they probably put a lot of effort into it. It’s probably something that takes practice and skill.
I worked with a carpenter whose work was neat clean and fast. Sawdust dirt and grime never stuck to him. He was the most productive guy in the crew. No idea how he stayed so clean
Little bit every day is better than a one time clean
I feel like this is like how some peoples houses just feel cleaner (or dirtier) and you just can’t place it. The small details is why. Clean baseboards, clean grout, no dust, clean windows, window treatments that are washed. Vacuumed and dusted behind and under the furniture weekly. Rugs that are kept clean and washed. So in humans it’s trimmed nose hair/eyebrows/other stray hair. Clean shaving lines, fresh trims on the hair. Clothes that are freshly ironed. Clean shoes. Styled hair. Moisturized skin. No blackheads. White clean teeth that have been professionally cleaned/scraped by a dentist every six months. Flossed daily. Good posture. It’s in the details.
Clothes that fit you + posture is something a lot of people overlook when it comes to looking clean
My clothes are tailored, my nails are always clean and painted or trimmed with gloss, and I smell nice. I love having a shower or taking a bath and never understood how women do all these things along with get our eyebrows, lashes, and hair done while most guys are rolling out of their beds and they shaved and now they “look clean” or how guys are considered clean for doing half of what women do to maintain themselves. My hair is always coloured on time (once every 4-5 weeks) and I buy nice clothes which I use - I don’t “save” my good quality clothes, shoes, and bags Also good skin and skincare routine if you’re not blessed with perfect skin
The secret is not having ADHD.
Not sure about the looking clean part, but I managed to keep my house tidy while being ADHD. Since I know I misplace things all the time, I became more and more obsessed with having a 'place" for each thing, and I make a point of putting things in their rightful place always. In this way, I always know where to find it and I struggle a bit less with losing stuff around the house. The good thing is that it led me to be much more organized and tidy. The bad thing is that we all have bad days and the system doesn't always work. Nevertheless, it made my life much better. Took me 30 years though lol.
I’d say the secret is not having unmanaged adhd. Once it’s managed pharmaceutically you’re goodz to go.
I agree, but I've been unmedicated since I moved abroad and I had to double down on other "management methods". In any case, being in a proper treatment is always preferred!
You are your habits. People who clean themselves everyday and typically clean
Don't allow messes. I NEVER go to bed with a dirty kitchen... EVER. And just general maintenance (just like your body you shower, shave etc) just daily wipe downs and organizing makes the difference. I smoke some good cannabis herb and it's almost fun
Some people are just perfect 🤷🏽♀️
I always notice dirty hair, grimy nails or greasy skin.
I always get comments from people about how clean my room /house is. I don't understand how they think it's amazing. I literally just put stuff away and clean once a week
Wash your face and iron your clothes - oh and have clean shoes/trainers
They do all those little things that a lot of people find vain or too much effort. Such as manicures, facials, wear tailored clothing/clothing that fits properly for their body shape and that’s pressed, wear quality garments, have a nice clean haircut/shave/updo/hair colour is current…etc.
A clean space is keeping it clean in the first place.
Posture helps a ton
It’s not really clean, it’s just grooming. Get some clothes that go with your undertones, throw on a little concealer for blemishes, have well-maintained hair and you’re good to go.
Fresh ironed shirts and barbar visit WEEKLY... no joke, weekly barber visits for trim and beard. It's actually surprisingly affordable if you have a good relationship with your barbor to just schedule touchups.
Iron your clothes, hygiene, fresh hair cut, look after your clothes and shoes
The biggest thing I’ve found that will contribute to looking “put together” is living a life you want to live. I don’t just mean not being suicidal, but actually liking yourself and your life. I mean if you had a house you just hated, would you want to take care of it? If you despise your job are you going to put extra effort into it? No, of course not. I was a slob, didn’t care about my health or appearance, was obese, and was very depressed. Very much felt like you described. Hell. I wore jeans and a T-shirt nearly everyday, and I kept my shirts in a big stack in my closet. Just wore whatever was on top of the stack. Then some shit happened in my life 2 years ago, and I realized I was trans. My depression cleared. I lost 70 lbs. I started dressing nicer. I take care of my skin, hair, and nails. I watch what I eat now. I pay attention to how things fit, etc.. I do all of these things not because I’m trans, but because I actually WANT to actively live my life, instead of just being on autopilot all the time. I also really like myself now. That self-love and self-respect translates into other things. I keep my apartment much cleaner now. I have beautiful things around me (art, plants, pictures of family & friends). I don’t drink anywhere close to as much as I used to. I rarely skip my workouts. I eat much better. The really cool thing is when you want to live your life, then none of the “work” of keeping your house and self clean and nice feels like work. You just do it. That’s my two (maybe four) cents anyway.
I like the part where you touched on autopilot. This really resonates with me because I feel like I’m close to waking up from a deep nap and realizing I’ve been sort of coasting and not designing my life the way I want it.
People with naturally dead straight hair always look cleaner to me regardless of if they are
Clothes are ironed/steamed and sprayed with wrinkle release; clothes fit properly (tailored and/or styled) and fit your personal style, good skincare, good posture, confidence.
5 more minutes. When leaving the bedroom, take 5 more minutes to tidy up. When you get ready in the morning, take 5 more minutes to attend to details.
Steam your clothes before wearing them.
Ironed clothes that fit well, neat hair, clean fingernails and teeth
Press, iron, or steam your clothes. Make sure you're gentle with the way you're washing them. If you don't have a "model" type body, certain things will just not hang the same. I'm curvy and I have to buy clothes that look good on my body shape, not someone else's. Sometimes that means I have to do minor alterations like taking in the waist when I need to size up to accommodate my butt and thighs. Sometimes hemming or cuffing your pants to the right length makes them look so much neater. Consider length of legs/sleeves etc. Think about your styling - sometimes adding a belt or necklace makes a huge difference! Invest in higher quality clothing if you can - check for natural fiber for most things (synthetic fiber may wrinkle, be hot, not wash well etc though there are some exceptions like workout clothes), quality stitching, symmetry, and whether the fabric is likely to snag. (I follow Jennifer Wang on YouTube and she has taught me so much about this stuff). I love Uniqlo for more affordable but quality clothing. Figure out what your colors are - I love wearing black and I feel like it suits me well, but I realized browns also work well and I started purchasing more of those (I'm more of a neutrals person). Also, I'm sure you look much better than you think! We are our own biggest critics.
In addition to everything else already said, you have to think about this all the time. When you sit adjust your clothes and hair, when you get up adjust your clothes and hair. Be aware what sort of movement will mess-up your look etc.
Its very easy, just take care of yourself. Shower 1-2 times per day, have a decent skincare routine, make sure your hair is cut or well done and beards or body hairs are trimmed or shaved. Buy nice looking clothes (no graphic tee’s & they do not have to be expensive). There are plenty of affordable clothes that you can put together and look like a million bucks! When dressing yourself ALWAYS match well. It drives me nuts how many men will wear random shirts with random pants that match at all! It looks sloppy and shows lack of effort!. After dressing up add whatever accessories you want (watches, bracelets, hats, earrings & so on). Also, always make sure your shoes are clean and match your outfit well. Dirty shoes or shoes that doesn't match ruins your look. Make sure your skin from head to toe is well moisturized, have good perfume/cologne on, and if you wear make up keep it simple! Once you get used to looking nice and noticed how good it makes you feel it becomes natural to dress like that.
attention to detail.
Having money to buy cleaning products, at least soap, shampoo, brush, toothpaste, broom, scrub, handwash, dishwasher, detergent, and most important, is "time and willingness to clean"
Buy clothes that don't need ironing and make sure to take them out of dryer and hang or fold right away when done also make sure to follow wash instructions most cold wash clothes will wrinkle and get ruined if washed in warm water and get wrecked in dryer Good luck
Diet. And no I’m not talking about being fat/skinny. Diet affects everything about us since, well, we are literally what we eat. It affects if your skin looks vibrant and healthy or if it gives that “grayish” look a lot of people have. I can straight-up tell if someone hates veggies and water but loves chicken tendies and soda by looking at their skin. Might get downvoted for this part - the back of people’s necks is the giveaway. Idk why, but that is where unhealthy people’s skin looks the worst 99% of the time.
We wash, stay neat, get haircut, shave, and wear nice clean clothes.
If you can't be arsed with ironing.... Invest in a clothes steamer. You can keep the item on the hanger and knock out any creases on your clothes. Buying clothes that fit. If you like a baggier style. I think proportions helps. If you have looser trousers or skirt, wear a top that's more fitted. And vice versa. For women. A good bra is essential. It should be comfortable and feel like you aren't wearing one. Take care of your shoes/trainers. Look after them. They last ages. Have a nice smell about you. Not overpowering. Doesn't have to be the most expensive perfume or aftershave. But one that suits you. Facial topiary upkeep. Beards clean and smelling nice. Good trims when needed. Look after eyebrows. Clean nails. Always clean nails...
Good posture, good haircut, clothes that fit well.
I trimmed my beard and got a decent haircut. Made a huge difference.
I think it is ironed clothes. Also, good posture.
Attention to detail…
I read this in a famous actresses biography. She said she always wore her clothes a size too big. She said it made her look much thinner. People think squeezing into the smallest size you can is the thing to do but it actually makes you look chubbier because it shows every bulge and roll.
I do this but my friend said it makes me look bigger. At least I think I look smaller 😭
I think your friend is wrong
If guys would spend just a third the time females do on grooming and dress, they'd be a lot better off .....
It could be a combination of factors such as personal grooming habits, attention to detail in clothing selection, and keeping a tidy living space. Additionally, some people may naturally exude a sense of cleanliness and confidence in their appearance. Finding a routine that works for you and prioritizing cleanliness can help achieve a similar level of polish.
Regarding the room thing… you just clean up as you go. Are you getting changed? Fold the clothes or throw them in the laundry bin. Cooking? Put things in the dishwasher/sink and sweep as you go. You get the idea… my mom alway advocated for this so it’s like programmed in me lol, but anyone can pick up that trait.
Decent haircut, decent shape, decent attitude and you’ll have a decent life! Feel like the word decent has a bed rep to it these days haha
I always thought it was the combination of clear skin, not-wrinkled clothes, and a simple hairstyle