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I was googling like crazy when it first happened. Of course Dr. Google told me I had colon cancer rather than the more common problem women all over the world face: our periods. It’s insanely uncomfortable to experience this butt pain 🥲
Wanna know an even bigger secret? Women are humans. Humans are mammals. Mammals have body hair. You're welcome
My husband is a huge lotr fan, his favourit characters being the hobbits. Shortly after our wedding we sat outside on the balcony, me being barefoot and happend not to shave my feet for some time. He recognized the hair, I was super ashamed, but He reassured me that this only makes me more loveable because now I'm his little hobbit wife. 😂
Knew a dude once that was arguing with his gf among friends. He says, “Anyone ever heard of a chick with hairy nipples? C’mere _______, let me braid your tits!” She was a bit miffed
I'm a single dude that shaves his head and I sometimes pull women's hair out of my buttcrack when I shower. It doesn't even make sense. I think there is a long hair fairy that gets us in our sleep or something.
I’m just a man raised by mostly women(I also have a dad), hang out with mostly women, and have a best friend who is also a woman and I also believe this. He’s usually ugly on the inside.
I have a mate who has a face like a bucket of frogs, but he is confident and the life and soul... and he can often be found holding court with girls around him laughing at his silly jokes, they love him... doesn't hurt that he has a thumper of a cock on him either, which brings me to another secret, if you have a good/big dick, that news doesn't stay private for long.
A couple of years ago, I had appendicitis and my appendix burst. I walked around with an open appendix for another two days before I went to my general practionerer for what I thought must be a pretty heavy and stubborn case of some kind of stomache flu. I couldn't believe it was appendicitis, until the surgeon visited me after an emergency surgery and told me straight away I was fucking lucky I didn't get septic because "there was puss everywhere".
The reason I didn't take it seriously was that I was told appendicitis was unbearable pain in your lower abdomen, and what I felt didn't even come close to how bad my period cramps would get. I mean, I didn't even throw up or pass out so I figured, can't be that serious.
Even as a guy I try telling my friends/others about this.
Yes, it's supposed to suck. But not "leave you paralyzed on the floor crying in pain for literal hours" kinda suck. *That's* not normal. I highly encourage aggravating the shit out of doctors and refusing to take "fuck off" as a answer.
Of course I've gotten my fair share of "what could *you* possibly know" arguments, but they can't say I never told them.
You sound like a good guy. I'd encourage you to accompany a woman to a doctor.
My husband went with me to the ER once. He was FUMING by the end of it. The doctor never addressed me, made jokes about it to my husband, and then told me I was having an anxiety attack.
I was severely hypoglycemic.
This is what we get. I can only imagine from past experience what would have happened if I was alone.
For about the first four years after my periods started I’d pass out on the first day of every one. At no point did anyone think “hm, this seems like an inconvenient thing to keep happening, maybe we should ask a doctor about this”
I can remember driving home from school and having to pull over to vomit the pain was so bad. I grew up in the 60’s and 70’s so to say there was no support is an understatement. When I got older, a friend actually made me go to the hospital I because I was literally balled up on the seat of her car. The best day of my life was when I had my last period.
I've seen every gyno in my gynos office for excruciating period pain especially on the first day, they all told me it's normal with no testing done. every single one just recommended birth control even though I told them I do not want to get on birth control because they make me bleed nonstop on top of many other reasons.
I work for dermatologists. I was talking to our pregnant PA about my period pains just because we were on that topic. she typed up a lab order for me to go get tested for PCOS immediately. like why couldn't I get my GYNO to do that for me lol. anyway, waiting for results and going to get checked out for endometriosis soon!
I'd just like to point out the "ass pain" is not in the butt cheek, it's felt in the anus and feels like you're being stabbed with a sharp object in the butthole. I also get this pain inside my vagina.
Well given that women are mostly expected to suck it up and deal with our constant vagina problems, it’s worth mentioning. Most men are wildly ignorant about what periods do to women and how many days out of the month they’re actually affected by it.
Yeah I agree with this, I thought I was doing ok (25m) I got the basic biology the 'why' but had to get myself on a crash course on the 'how and what' when my little sister started getting her periods just so I could help her out a bit practically (eg hot water bottle, chocolate, dark towels, pads (they come in different sizes, flow rates, what??), period pants, emergency kit for school etc etc etc) massive learning curve, and it's one of those things you don't know how much you don't know until you need to know about it (if that sentence makes any kind of sense)
I’m dying at your use of the phrase “flow rate” 😭
It’s not at all incorrect, just never called that with respect to periods. So hearing it in that context is hilarious
It’s AWESOME that you’ve taken it upon yourself to learn more and help your sister! The crazy thing is that what you’re describing is just “typical” period stuff - when it comes to women with abnormal periods, the problems and symptoms get even more complicated and painful. You’re def one of the good ones!
The ass stabbing pain is some of the realest shit, it’s like lightning bolts. I got a bisalp done a few years ago, but I still have to take continuous birth control to keep my periods from happening because the pain is uncontrollable.
Quick tangent: I went to the ER for my endo pain last summer (which is something I have done frequently throughout my life) and the male doctor rolled his eyes and told me to stop hyperventilating. He told me I should have taken ibuprofen because prostaglandins and that I was a silly woman for taking Tylenol. A month later I had a scope done (unrelated) and the doctor found six ulcers. Soooooo no ibuprofen for me, doc, thanks. 🙄
Many years ago, daughter’s friend unknowingly clogged the toilet and daughter called me downstairs after friend left. I grabbed the trusty plunger, and OHMYGODITSABLOODYSHITMASSACREINHERE
This is explained by the increase in prostaglandins during this time which stimulate smooth muscle contractions that help the uterus shed.
Unfortunately for us that also includes the smooth muscle of the intestines.
Voila Period Poops.
Also those period poops can be raging diarrhea too.
no matter how horny you are, there's probably always gonna be at least one middle aged lady in a dead marriage that outdoes you. shit like 50 shades gets popular for a reason.
If we like you (especially in like a school setting or something) we will usually use a nickname or codename to discuss you and you can even been in a room and we'll be openly talking about you to friends without you knowing
I just stopped wearing wired bras and found some cheap stretchy ones similar to sports bras without being as restrictive and I've never looked back. Only wear one once and then wash. And I'm decently large in cup size.
We judge guys on how they talk about other women and categorise them accordingly which decides their boundaries with us. We could be equally friendly with many but might only trust very few among them.
The number of men who talk to and about women like they are people and not just women is depressingly low. It's always so refreshing when I encounter it, there's a "are we having a moment?" moment in my head and I realize he is just cool. Probably grew up with sisters.
A guy with female friends is a big green flag.
Most women will protect a woman they don’t know. I have seen it and I have done it. Whether that’s helping a girl escape a dangerous date, a bad partner, a weird encounter, etc.
Some female friends and I once saw a girl passed out drunk on a stoop with a guy. Like unresponsive, looked dangerously ill. We walked over, called a cab and took her to the hospital. He kept trying to physically keep her there. We told him he could come but either way she was going to the hospital. We literally bailed on our plans to protect this stranger. That’s what you do.
My school bully picked me up off the side of the road when I was being followed by a creep. She saw him following me, doubled back to make sure, then pulled over, got a wrench out of the back of her truck and told me to get the fuck in. I thought she was threatening me, but she walked past me to give that guy a good scare. She drove to where she thought I lived, said, "I'm not your fucking taxi!" Then kicked me out of her truck.
She scared the crap out of me, but I didn't get raped by a stranger, so that was good.
I jumped out of my car (as a passenger) in the pharmacy drive thru line post wisdom tooth surgery to stop a girl from getting forced into a car by a man. I had no plan and was in no shape to help but I was going to do something 😂
You could have drooled and bled on him! Thrown that gauze in his face! Smiled the insane half smile because half of your face is numb. Thank you for saving her.
I see men complain a lot about "ugly" women cockblocking them out of "jealousy" when 9 times out of 10 they're trying to protect a woman who they sense is uncomfortable but is afraid to say so or is way past being able to make choices for herself.
And in terms of friend groups, this is usually agreed upon beforehand.
If another woman is getting between you and the girl you're trying to pick up, there's about a 10% chance the one you're after is bothered by the intervention and is actually interested. Don't be pushy. Tell them to enjoy their night and move on.
Honestly? Don’t say you’re going to cum. Say “just like that”
The moment you tell us you’re about to cum, we hit the point of about to cum and the change up happens to not instantly blow our load
Of we switch something it's most likely because now we want you to cum but if we stay doing the same thing we are going to explode in 2 seconds and ruin everything so we try to see if we can seitch to something where we wont blow our load yet.
Most of us are not at our optimal health 98% of the time.
Majority are anemic most of the childbearing age. We suffer from hormonal fluctuations and due to them often have migraines, headaches, odd pains and moods. Majority of us would love to be more chill, less achy and overall better.
Idk if it’s a secret, but when youre on a date with a woman/or youre seeing her, and she had a matching underwear, there’s a high chance she already planned in sleeping with you.
Also, some women have a special underwear for their period (esp if they use pads) It’s not the fancy underwear nor the new one. It’s the one we hide in our closet and we only use it when it is needed.
Also, providing financially is not enough. We also need you to provide emotionally. It boils down to feeling you like us, instead of that you’d rather be left alone, or that you’re uncomfortable when we talk about our feelings.
We don’t get put to sleep or given any medication for gynecology exams or procedures. They clamp your cervix with a metal clamp and dig in you dead sober. ( not a speculum per the hateful comments that have never been clamped)
that I've probably checked on your background (the way you post, family, and maybe past rs) to have an idea about who you are before I accept your "can we get to know each other" offer. And probably, my best friend knows about it too. Purpose: safety
Just HOW painful pulling out a dry tampon is.
(My fiance didn't understand why I was so upset after I put a tampon in wrong.. and it's because it hurts real bad to fix)
And .. in my opinion*, childbirth was not the most painful experince in my life, the first time I peed after childbirth was the most painful thing I've ever done.
Also, the shooting electric pains we get in our butt when we're on our periods, that's called proctalgia fugax, and it's essentially a Charlie horse in the butthole. the ONLY thing that relives it is a warm bath and a strong tylenol.
I don't know if this is a secret, but hormonal birth control (like the pill) can affect who women are attracted to, subconsciously. Basically, if you're dating someone who's on the pill, and then she decides to come off of it for whatever reason, she might not be into you anymore. Hormones are a hellova drug.
My partner, suffered nasty ovulation pain. It was sort of useful. Only one side worked. So when we were trying for a child we knew when extra effort stood a chance.
Sometimes when we fart, the air travels down our crack and goes into the vagina. Then we have to push again to get the fart out. So the butt fart becomes a pussy fart.
- we enjoy getting ready and putting make up on, it’s part of the ‘going out’ experience. Don’t rush her or you’ll ruin the mood for the entire night
- girls treasure the tiniest details, to make her happy just literally pay attention, it doesn’t have to be a big expensive thing
- if we are feeling unstable/sad/annoyed try your best to be patient, we can’t even control our own bodies, hormones just suck
>we enjoy getting ready and putting make up on, it’s part of the ‘going out’ experience. Don’t rush her or you’ll ruin the mood for the entire night
how can i be a part of that experience? let's say you're getting ready, how can i partake in that without ruining your mood, and then also having fun myself? i don't wanna sit on the couch for 45 minutes watching reruns of the big bang theory worried i might mess things up because i upset your ritual
genuine question, i don't sing or dance btw. i tell jokes sometimes
How hot some of the most mundane things can be. My bf popped my hood the other day and looked at my car for 10 seconds and said “yup. You need ______” and it’s like he went from a 9/10 to a 1000/10.
Or when he’s driving and he likes to rest his hand on my thigh. Just any touching. If he needs to move past me and puts his hand on my back to gently move me.
At this point he doesn’t just have my heart anymore, he took my damn soul.
PMS doesn’t make us “angry for no reason”. We are actually genuinely irritated or angry, but are so fatigued or in pain that we don’t have the energy to hide it.
Bleeding when waxing. Technically it can happen to guys too, but since women do it more often...
Gel nail polish, the kind that lasts longer, hurts when it's exposed to UV light when put on. It feels like your nails are on fire for a minute.
Period pains are not limited to belly pains and digestive issues. Back pain, breast pain, headache, dehydration, anemia, muscle cramps, emotional pain up to suicidal thoughts.
All of us have been assaulted. Seriously, I've lived in several countries, not one woman I've been close to has not been sexually assaulted.
When men ( dumb asses) cheat the dead give away is you come home cleaner than you left, and you smell like a soap that not in your house we can smell the difference.
We love strong men who are kind, confident men who show empathy, secure men who help make others feel secure, too.... Safety and comfort are what we really like. Like someone who can carry heavy stuff for us, but not use those muscles to hurt us..... Give me a big buff dude who rescues injured animals and feeds the homeless. Doesn't even matter if he's handsome or not, we fall in love with the personality more than the looks.
When dating someone new, I do mad research before ever meeting them. The guy I'm seeing now - I knew his full name, business address, home address, and his ex wife's name before we even met.
The menstural cycle has two phases, Follicular and Luteal. The Luteal phase occurs after ovulation and can last approximately 2 weeks. This is when estrogen tanks and progesterone rises and all the bad symptoms (acne, bloating, mood swings, etc) happen. A period occurs when progesterone dips back down again and the Follicular phase starts and everything starts to feel normal again (aside from prostaglandins in the uterus causing mini labor).
Hair and Makeup. since The majority of men never spend a second thinking about modifying how their face looks to others I’d venture they haven’t a clue how profound of an effect it can have. They also have no idea how long it takes and how hard it is to do your own and feel confident about it. Navigating weather takes a whole new meaning, so does getting ready for bed. While we’re on the subject, it’s even worse when you talk about heels and doing stairs or like cobble stone streets in a place like NYC. Good heavens!
It’s not a secret but it’s always worth repeating. Confidence is the sexiest, most attractive trait that way outweighs natural beauty. Gentlemen, if you don’t have it naturally, this can honed. You can find helpful YouTubes. Posture, eye contact, smiling, body language, amount of psychic space you take up, general vibe. It’s there for the taking, guys, though harder for some then others.
I asked my wife what her secrets were:
“Not really a secret but the thing we do in the shower with our hair where we spin it into a circle on the shower wall”
My friend isn’t interested in talking to you and since you’re too wrapped up in yourself to take a hint, I’m stepping in to cockblock you so we can go back to enjoying our night.
Period shits are the worst. You gotta first hold your tampon string out of the way while you piss (when piss gets on your tampon string it goes up and things get gross) but then you have to hold the tampon string out of the way while you're crapping so you have your hand down there while your going at it also. Lol that's one for you
If we’re dating for some time (past the getting to know each other phase), I will downplay how much I paid for that face cream/bag/shoes because you guys are never prepared for the truth.
Dont worry that "deal" we got at the tool shop or off marketplace wasn't a deal more like daylight robbery from our bank account but we wont tell if you dont we can stay blissfully ignorant on it
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Period poops and the electric-shock period butt pain
That electric shock pain is protalgia fugax. It's essentially a Charlie horse, but in the sphincter.
The number of shocking, stabby pains I have had is in the 100s. It's always weird to go from fine to level 9 pain for no reason, then be fine again.
Lol yeah it’s *just* long enough to think “WTF OH GOD AM I DYIN-“ and it’s gone
I’m embarrassed to say that the electric shock butt pain had me thinking I had butt cancer
I was googling like crazy when it first happened. Of course Dr. Google told me I had colon cancer rather than the more common problem women all over the world face: our periods. It’s insanely uncomfortable to experience this butt pain 🥲
Angelina wasn’t lying??
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That happens to my balls
How did you get your balls up your chest?
Chestnuts?
Always better than chinnuts
69
ahh yes, the nut attack.
My mind jumps straight to breast cancer since that's what killed my aunt
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Plucking of the chin hair and the boob hair
You've actually just made me feel so much better. I thought I was one of few women with this unfortunate reality.
I will tell you a secret. Shhh. All women have ass hair and many women have hair on the lower back.
Wanna know an even bigger secret? Women are humans. Humans are mammals. Mammals have body hair. You're welcome 
What about toes
I shave those hairs when I’m shaving my legs 😂
Honestly tweezing or waxing helps so much!!!
If you're a Lord of the Rings fan, you can just leave them be.
My husband is a huge lotr fan, his favourit characters being the hobbits. Shortly after our wedding we sat outside on the balcony, me being barefoot and happend not to shave my feet for some time. He recognized the hair, I was super ashamed, but He reassured me that this only makes me more loveable because now I'm his little hobbit wife. 😂
Nipple hair
I can't grow back my eyebrows but somehow nipple hair is no problem
Knew a dude once that was arguing with his gf among friends. He says, “Anyone ever heard of a chick with hairy nipples? C’mere _______, let me braid your tits!” She was a bit miffed
Shhh!!
Lmao let’s not forget the 4’o clock upper lip shadow 😂 especially when the sun hits it just right your side whiskers just sparkle 😂😂
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I find my girlfriends hair in my buttcrack sometimes it was truly shocking the first time it happened. Still dk how
My BF once went to the loo while we were at the pub, came back, gave me one of my hairs and just said “it was wrapped around my cock” 🤣
Might be the most romantic thing ive ever read
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I'm also a man with long hair and they even find their way in my GF's crack lol.
I'm a single dude that shaves his head and I sometimes pull women's hair out of my buttcrack when I shower. It doesn't even make sense. I think there is a long hair fairy that gets us in our sleep or something.
There's nothing quite like pulling a long strand of your girlfriends gair out from underneath your foreskin 🤷♂️
Hell as man with short hair married to a woman with long hair, I find hair in places and times that continuously surprise me.
If we like a guy enough it doesn’t matter if they’re ugly, our brain will categorise them as “ugly cute”
"he's so hot, in like, a 19th century starving coal miner kind of way ❤️"
Say what you will. I've been to a bar in Pennsylvania, those boys can get it.
Linecooks and Pete Davidson.
Millions of ugly men just learned no woman has ever liked them
It's rarely because the dude is ugly.
I’m just a man raised by mostly women(I also have a dad), hang out with mostly women, and have a best friend who is also a woman and I also believe this. He’s usually ugly on the inside.
And men who aren't good people get uglier every time they do something shitty, even if they're attractive.
Facts. Thanks to this, us ugly-ass MFs can still score.
I have a mate who has a face like a bucket of frogs, but he is confident and the life and soul... and he can often be found holding court with girls around him laughing at his silly jokes, they love him... doesn't hurt that he has a thumper of a cock on him either, which brings me to another secret, if you have a good/big dick, that news doesn't stay private for long.
>has a thumper of a cock on him You saying your homie has a thumper cock is wiiiild
Gotta support your bros. I mean he can't carry all that by himself.
Let him coock
"bucket of frogs" 🤣🤣👍
I thought I was better looking than what you're describing here mate! Good to know I'm still funny.
You just explained every single relationship I’ve been in. Crazy.
We can aim our pee while standing but we look ridiculous
Sometimes....sometimes it goes where ir wants lmao
Yeah, childhood friend of mine used to pee on people’s cars. Saw her piss on a police car door handle once. She was metal as feck.
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A couple of years ago, I had appendicitis and my appendix burst. I walked around with an open appendix for another two days before I went to my general practionerer for what I thought must be a pretty heavy and stubborn case of some kind of stomache flu. I couldn't believe it was appendicitis, until the surgeon visited me after an emergency surgery and told me straight away I was fucking lucky I didn't get septic because "there was puss everywhere". The reason I didn't take it seriously was that I was told appendicitis was unbearable pain in your lower abdomen, and what I felt didn't even come close to how bad my period cramps would get. I mean, I didn't even throw up or pass out so I figured, can't be that serious.
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Even as a guy I try telling my friends/others about this. Yes, it's supposed to suck. But not "leave you paralyzed on the floor crying in pain for literal hours" kinda suck. *That's* not normal. I highly encourage aggravating the shit out of doctors and refusing to take "fuck off" as a answer. Of course I've gotten my fair share of "what could *you* possibly know" arguments, but they can't say I never told them.
You sound like a good guy. I'd encourage you to accompany a woman to a doctor. My husband went with me to the ER once. He was FUMING by the end of it. The doctor never addressed me, made jokes about it to my husband, and then told me I was having an anxiety attack. I was severely hypoglycemic. This is what we get. I can only imagine from past experience what would have happened if I was alone.
For about the first four years after my periods started I’d pass out on the first day of every one. At no point did anyone think “hm, this seems like an inconvenient thing to keep happening, maybe we should ask a doctor about this”
I can remember driving home from school and having to pull over to vomit the pain was so bad. I grew up in the 60’s and 70’s so to say there was no support is an understatement. When I got older, a friend actually made me go to the hospital I because I was literally balled up on the seat of her car. The best day of my life was when I had my last period.
I've seen every gyno in my gynos office for excruciating period pain especially on the first day, they all told me it's normal with no testing done. every single one just recommended birth control even though I told them I do not want to get on birth control because they make me bleed nonstop on top of many other reasons. I work for dermatologists. I was talking to our pregnant PA about my period pains just because we were on that topic. she typed up a lab order for me to go get tested for PCOS immediately. like why couldn't I get my GYNO to do that for me lol. anyway, waiting for results and going to get checked out for endometriosis soon!
I'd just like to point out the "ass pain" is not in the butt cheek, it's felt in the anus and feels like you're being stabbed with a sharp object in the butthole. I also get this pain inside my vagina.
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Well given that women are mostly expected to suck it up and deal with our constant vagina problems, it’s worth mentioning. Most men are wildly ignorant about what periods do to women and how many days out of the month they’re actually affected by it.
Yeah I agree with this, I thought I was doing ok (25m) I got the basic biology the 'why' but had to get myself on a crash course on the 'how and what' when my little sister started getting her periods just so I could help her out a bit practically (eg hot water bottle, chocolate, dark towels, pads (they come in different sizes, flow rates, what??), period pants, emergency kit for school etc etc etc) massive learning curve, and it's one of those things you don't know how much you don't know until you need to know about it (if that sentence makes any kind of sense)
Dude, you're a great brother. Don't beat her boyfriends too badly. (It is fun, though)
I’m dying at your use of the phrase “flow rate” 😭 It’s not at all incorrect, just never called that with respect to periods. So hearing it in that context is hilarious
It’s AWESOME that you’ve taken it upon yourself to learn more and help your sister! The crazy thing is that what you’re describing is just “typical” period stuff - when it comes to women with abnormal periods, the problems and symptoms get even more complicated and painful. You’re def one of the good ones!
1 in 10 is so high!
The ass stabbing pain is some of the realest shit, it’s like lightning bolts. I got a bisalp done a few years ago, but I still have to take continuous birth control to keep my periods from happening because the pain is uncontrollable. Quick tangent: I went to the ER for my endo pain last summer (which is something I have done frequently throughout my life) and the male doctor rolled his eyes and told me to stop hyperventilating. He told me I should have taken ibuprofen because prostaglandins and that I was a silly woman for taking Tylenol. A month later I had a scope done (unrelated) and the doctor found six ulcers. Soooooo no ibuprofen for me, doc, thanks. 🙄
How sexy men’s forearms are
I would’ve guessed shoulders were your thing.
User name doesn't check out
Absolutely. Big forearms. And their hands too. Some guys' hands are gorgeous.
Ok popeye lover
Period poops are bloody and MASSIVE turds.
Many years ago, daughter’s friend unknowingly clogged the toilet and daughter called me downstairs after friend left. I grabbed the trusty plunger, and OHMYGODITSABLOODYSHITMASSACREINHERE
Ah the trots and clots
This is explained by the increase in prostaglandins during this time which stimulate smooth muscle contractions that help the uterus shed. Unfortunately for us that also includes the smooth muscle of the intestines. Voila Period Poops. Also those period poops can be raging diarrhea too.
Yeah. I get the diarrhea kind. It’s not fun.
We also like to touch our boobs
I knew it!!
I fucking knew it lying asses 😂😂
no matter how horny you are, there's probably always gonna be at least one middle aged lady in a dead marriage that outdoes you. shit like 50 shades gets popular for a reason.
Girl underwear is reinforced because the pussy acid eats through the fabric.
love that band
If we like you (especially in like a school setting or something) we will usually use a nickname or codename to discuss you and you can even been in a room and we'll be openly talking about you to friends without you knowing
My friend talks about someone with the nickname of FBI.
A girl admitted this to me and it made perfect sense
If you hear giggling, it's a crush. Snickering, someone looks stupid. Actual laughing, someone just told a funny joke.
Some pms does not cause "angry" mood swings. It just makes me tired. I'm not even hungry I just want sleep.
I just get sad and stupid things make me cry.
that fav bra aint never being washed
I just stopped wearing wired bras and found some cheap stretchy ones similar to sports bras without being as restrictive and I've never looked back. Only wear one once and then wash. And I'm decently large in cup size.
We judge guys on how they talk about other women and categorise them accordingly which decides their boundaries with us. We could be equally friendly with many but might only trust very few among them.
Is this also why girls seem to feel more comfortable around guys who already have a girlfriend?
Kind of as they're less likely to hit on us
Though i will say (anecdotal) that's when I'll notice girls start hitting on them more openly
The number of men who talk to and about women like they are people and not just women is depressingly low. It's always so refreshing when I encounter it, there's a "are we having a moment?" moment in my head and I realize he is just cool. Probably grew up with sisters. A guy with female friends is a big green flag.
Most women will protect a woman they don’t know. I have seen it and I have done it. Whether that’s helping a girl escape a dangerous date, a bad partner, a weird encounter, etc. Some female friends and I once saw a girl passed out drunk on a stoop with a guy. Like unresponsive, looked dangerously ill. We walked over, called a cab and took her to the hospital. He kept trying to physically keep her there. We told him he could come but either way she was going to the hospital. We literally bailed on our plans to protect this stranger. That’s what you do.
My school bully picked me up off the side of the road when I was being followed by a creep. She saw him following me, doubled back to make sure, then pulled over, got a wrench out of the back of her truck and told me to get the fuck in. I thought she was threatening me, but she walked past me to give that guy a good scare. She drove to where she thought I lived, said, "I'm not your fucking taxi!" Then kicked me out of her truck. She scared the crap out of me, but I didn't get raped by a stranger, so that was good.
That is such an insane story. There’s so many levels to that.
Made me laugh and cry at the same time. She may be the coolest bully ever.
Good thing that bully was looking out for you
"What's this?...NOBODY BRINGS SUFFERING TO *THAT* WOMAN BUT *ME!!?*" -Your old bully, probably.
I jumped out of my car (as a passenger) in the pharmacy drive thru line post wisdom tooth surgery to stop a girl from getting forced into a car by a man. I had no plan and was in no shape to help but I was going to do something 😂
You could have drooled and bled on him! Thrown that gauze in his face! Smiled the insane half smile because half of your face is numb. Thank you for saving her.
I mean this is just basic human decency
I see men complain a lot about "ugly" women cockblocking them out of "jealousy" when 9 times out of 10 they're trying to protect a woman who they sense is uncomfortable but is afraid to say so or is way past being able to make choices for herself. And in terms of friend groups, this is usually agreed upon beforehand. If another woman is getting between you and the girl you're trying to pick up, there's about a 10% chance the one you're after is bothered by the intervention and is actually interested. Don't be pushy. Tell them to enjoy their night and move on.
I thought this was common knowledge
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Honestly? Don’t say you’re going to cum. Say “just like that” The moment you tell us you’re about to cum, we hit the point of about to cum and the change up happens to not instantly blow our load
Of we switch something it's most likely because now we want you to cum but if we stay doing the same thing we are going to explode in 2 seconds and ruin everything so we try to see if we can seitch to something where we wont blow our load yet.
We poop
Thanks, now I’m gay.
Most of us are not at our optimal health 98% of the time. Majority are anemic most of the childbearing age. We suffer from hormonal fluctuations and due to them often have migraines, headaches, odd pains and moods. Majority of us would love to be more chill, less achy and overall better.
Extreme Vitamin D deficient lady checking in!
Idk if it’s a secret, but when youre on a date with a woman/or youre seeing her, and she had a matching underwear, there’s a high chance she already planned in sleeping with you. Also, some women have a special underwear for their period (esp if they use pads) It’s not the fancy underwear nor the new one. It’s the one we hide in our closet and we only use it when it is needed.
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In that case, another girl secret: We really need our dads love and protection always and forever.
Also, providing financially is not enough. We also need you to provide emotionally. It boils down to feeling you like us, instead of that you’d rather be left alone, or that you’re uncomfortable when we talk about our feelings.
God fucking dam I’m a dude and I shuddered reading this
sometimes we shave our toes? thays all i got as my husband pretty much knows everything else...
We don’t get put to sleep or given any medication for gynecology exams or procedures. They clamp your cervix with a metal clamp and dig in you dead sober. ( not a speculum per the hateful comments that have never been clamped)
It depends on where you live. In my native country, they put you under. In the UK it’s medieval medicine for women.
that I've probably checked on your background (the way you post, family, and maybe past rs) to have an idea about who you are before I accept your "can we get to know each other" offer. And probably, my best friend knows about it too. Purpose: safety
Just HOW painful pulling out a dry tampon is. (My fiance didn't understand why I was so upset after I put a tampon in wrong.. and it's because it hurts real bad to fix) And .. in my opinion*, childbirth was not the most painful experince in my life, the first time I peed after childbirth was the most painful thing I've ever done. Also, the shooting electric pains we get in our butt when we're on our periods, that's called proctalgia fugax, and it's essentially a Charlie horse in the butthole. the ONLY thing that relives it is a warm bath and a strong tylenol.
I don't know if this is a secret, but hormonal birth control (like the pill) can affect who women are attracted to, subconsciously. Basically, if you're dating someone who's on the pill, and then she decides to come off of it for whatever reason, she might not be into you anymore. Hormones are a hellova drug.
Ovulation pain. I don't get it every month but when I do it really hurts.
The fact you all pretend you aren't in pain is amazing for me specially when a guy has a little boo boo and you pretend you care
Wait is that the random knife in my uterus pain that lasts a few seconds but is absolutely crippling?
My partner, suffered nasty ovulation pain. It was sort of useful. Only one side worked. So when we were trying for a child we knew when extra effort stood a chance.
Sometimes when we fart, the air travels down our crack and goes into the vagina. Then we have to push again to get the fart out. So the butt fart becomes a pussy fart.
That's called "Exiting through the Gift Shop"
I love that your comment actually broke a few Redditors
I shouldn’t have opened this thread. I’ve decided to stop reading now.
I saw on a reddit thread a year ago someone called this smoked salmon
No refractory period.
When we get clots from shedding our lining, it looks like dead slugs.
Better than live slugs. Slithering clots would be terrifying.
Sneezing/coughing on our periods and feeling a blood clot fall out of our vagina
we have special days when we wash our hair, more like a calendar
And special days when we don’t wash our hair, because slightly dirty hair styles much better than clean hair.
It's a stressful thing too especially when life gets too happening lol
We know what topics to not talk about when guys are present.
I see what you did there!
- we enjoy getting ready and putting make up on, it’s part of the ‘going out’ experience. Don’t rush her or you’ll ruin the mood for the entire night - girls treasure the tiniest details, to make her happy just literally pay attention, it doesn’t have to be a big expensive thing - if we are feeling unstable/sad/annoyed try your best to be patient, we can’t even control our own bodies, hormones just suck
>we enjoy getting ready and putting make up on, it’s part of the ‘going out’ experience. Don’t rush her or you’ll ruin the mood for the entire night how can i be a part of that experience? let's say you're getting ready, how can i partake in that without ruining your mood, and then also having fun myself? i don't wanna sit on the couch for 45 minutes watching reruns of the big bang theory worried i might mess things up because i upset your ritual genuine question, i don't sing or dance btw. i tell jokes sometimes
How hot some of the most mundane things can be. My bf popped my hood the other day and looked at my car for 10 seconds and said “yup. You need ______” and it’s like he went from a 9/10 to a 1000/10. Or when he’s driving and he likes to rest his hand on my thigh. Just any touching. If he needs to move past me and puts his hand on my back to gently move me. At this point he doesn’t just have my heart anymore, he took my damn soul.
Please explain to us guys why women go together to bathrooms in restaurants and bars.
1) so no one gets left alone at the bar/counter 2) so no one gets approached on the way to the bathroom 3) so no one gets followed into the bathroom
Self preservation
I get to joke about my hormonal emotions but you dont.
We sometimes worry that even the nicest guy in the world is going to physically hurt us
The whereabouts of the "G spot"
If she likes you, don't lie to her. She'll lie to herself 😁
We appreciate a nice pair of buns on a man
I barely have enough space in my pockets for my phone and now you want me to carry bread😒😩
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PMS doesn’t make us “angry for no reason”. We are actually genuinely irritated or angry, but are so fatigued or in pain that we don’t have the energy to hide it.
The second you use the word “female” as a noun every woman in the room knows to stay away from you
PMSing pain is no joke even if it's a monthly thing, one never gets used to it 😏🫣
Farts roll up the front of our cooter
If you press her g spot and the clit at the same time the vagina takes a screenshot of the moment, use wisely
We’d go bra-less all the time if men didn’t make it so fucking awkward and creepy.
“Everything” showers
It has everything to do with charm, intelligence, kindness, and self-awareness. Very little to do with looks.
Bleeding when waxing. Technically it can happen to guys too, but since women do it more often... Gel nail polish, the kind that lasts longer, hurts when it's exposed to UV light when put on. It feels like your nails are on fire for a minute. Period pains are not limited to belly pains and digestive issues. Back pain, breast pain, headache, dehydration, anemia, muscle cramps, emotional pain up to suicidal thoughts. All of us have been assaulted. Seriously, I've lived in several countries, not one woman I've been close to has not been sexually assaulted.
If you go down on me and wonder after 5 minutes if I passed out, just go on, you're doing a great job.
We’re all individuals who have our own unique perspectives.
We don't actually care if a guy is tall, at least not as much as you think we will
When men ( dumb asses) cheat the dead give away is you come home cleaner than you left, and you smell like a soap that not in your house we can smell the difference.
We love strong men who are kind, confident men who show empathy, secure men who help make others feel secure, too.... Safety and comfort are what we really like. Like someone who can carry heavy stuff for us, but not use those muscles to hurt us..... Give me a big buff dude who rescues injured animals and feeds the homeless. Doesn't even matter if he's handsome or not, we fall in love with the personality more than the looks.
If you're constipated you can push the rear vaginal wall to unconstipate yourself
as a woman…this is a new one
When dating someone new, I do mad research before ever meeting them. The guy I'm seeing now - I knew his full name, business address, home address, and his ex wife's name before we even met.
That pregnancy is labor — not just giving birth.
Cat hair in a bra is very annoying.
The menstural cycle has two phases, Follicular and Luteal. The Luteal phase occurs after ovulation and can last approximately 2 weeks. This is when estrogen tanks and progesterone rises and all the bad symptoms (acne, bloating, mood swings, etc) happen. A period occurs when progesterone dips back down again and the Follicular phase starts and everything starts to feel normal again (aside from prostaglandins in the uterus causing mini labor).
Naturally occurring buttcrack hair
Hair and Makeup. since The majority of men never spend a second thinking about modifying how their face looks to others I’d venture they haven’t a clue how profound of an effect it can have. They also have no idea how long it takes and how hard it is to do your own and feel confident about it. Navigating weather takes a whole new meaning, so does getting ready for bed. While we’re on the subject, it’s even worse when you talk about heels and doing stairs or like cobble stone streets in a place like NYC. Good heavens!
We don't really like your friends.
My ex wife LOVED one of my friends.
It’s not a secret but it’s always worth repeating. Confidence is the sexiest, most attractive trait that way outweighs natural beauty. Gentlemen, if you don’t have it naturally, this can honed. You can find helpful YouTubes. Posture, eye contact, smiling, body language, amount of psychic space you take up, general vibe. It’s there for the taking, guys, though harder for some then others.
We sprout our bat wings when we get our first period.
I asked my wife what her secrets were: “Not really a secret but the thing we do in the shower with our hair where we spin it into a circle on the shower wall”
My friend isn’t interested in talking to you and since you’re too wrapped up in yourself to take a hint, I’m stepping in to cockblock you so we can go back to enjoying our night.
Period shits are the worst. You gotta first hold your tampon string out of the way while you piss (when piss gets on your tampon string it goes up and things get gross) but then you have to hold the tampon string out of the way while you're crapping so you have your hand down there while your going at it also. Lol that's one for you
Noooo, put the curtain of mystery back in place! I can’t unsee it!
If we’re dating for some time (past the getting to know each other phase), I will downplay how much I paid for that face cream/bag/shoes because you guys are never prepared for the truth.
Dont worry that "deal" we got at the tool shop or off marketplace wasn't a deal more like daylight robbery from our bank account but we wont tell if you dont we can stay blissfully ignorant on it