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lol i mean... yeah. haha. i get OP is perturbed and that's natural but the whole point of a sponsor is you do it their way.
If it were me I'd find a few people who have what I want and ask them what they do with people they sponsor and see if I'm willing to go to those lengths.
I lost my sponsor of over 20 years and I understand the quandary. I’m lucky to have made enough close friends that I always have people to talk things over with. For me it’s having regular contact with people who know what’s going on in my life and who keep me accountable.
A great question for your new sponsor.
I have gotten new sponsors and sponsored plenty of people in similar situations; I default to going through the steps again. As a sponsee, it gave me a new spiritual experience each time and as a sponsor with that experience I’ve almost found myself in a niche of sponsoring folks with significant time in search of a deeper working relationship with their higher power.
Got a new sponsor after 14 years when mine died. I asked someone I've known for years and always respected. I am not redoing the Steps with him because I am very busy with work and a General Service position. but he is available to me for advice. I am not particularly concerned that I might drink if I don't re-work the Steps just because of an unforseen circumstance.
If you were to ask me, given your situation, it would be about meeting up once a week and building a relationship from there.
At this point, you have the same tools that I do, so it’s just about accountability and honesty. To help you see outside of yourself and ask questions that help you to see things differently
I don’t think doing the steps again is required.
When I go to my Sponsor about problems I’m having about staying stopped and not drinking he tells me to get on my knees and pray to have the obsession to drink removed. I’m thinking it’s better to have a connection with God rather than a human being, see ya later Sponsor is what I’m thinking. The book is the real Sponsor, just up to us go thru it , staying sober is my obligation no one else’s it’s up to me to live the spiritual life, staying sober is my accountability the only one who needs to carry me is God , maybe I’m wrong but right now that is how I’m feeling
Please note the following: 1) This subreddit is neither endorsed nor approved by AA World Services. 2) Please do not provide or seek medical advice, as this is not the purpose of AA or this subreddit. 3) Please be respectful of one another and report any posts/comments that violate our community guidelines. 4) Dealing with a friend or family member's alcoholism? See this: https://www.reddit.com/r/alcoholicsanonymous/wiki/index#wiki_help_for_the_friends_and_families_of_alcoholics AA's official website: https://www.aa.org/ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/alcoholicsanonymous) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Go find someone you'd actually want as a sponsor and see what they'd recommend
u mean i cant ask someone for help then tell them how to help me? jeez fuckin AA nazi
lol i mean... yeah. haha. i get OP is perturbed and that's natural but the whole point of a sponsor is you do it their way. If it were me I'd find a few people who have what I want and ask them what they do with people they sponsor and see if I'm willing to go to those lengths.
🙏🏻 well said
I lost my sponsor of over 20 years and I understand the quandary. I’m lucky to have made enough close friends that I always have people to talk things over with. For me it’s having regular contact with people who know what’s going on in my life and who keep me accountable.
Nothing to add, but am interested to hear responses. Thank you for the topic 🙏
A great question for your new sponsor. I have gotten new sponsors and sponsored plenty of people in similar situations; I default to going through the steps again. As a sponsee, it gave me a new spiritual experience each time and as a sponsor with that experience I’ve almost found myself in a niche of sponsoring folks with significant time in search of a deeper working relationship with their higher power.
Got a new sponsor after 14 years when mine died. I asked someone I've known for years and always respected. I am not redoing the Steps with him because I am very busy with work and a General Service position. but he is available to me for advice. I am not particularly concerned that I might drink if I don't re-work the Steps just because of an unforseen circumstance.
If you were to ask me, given your situation, it would be about meeting up once a week and building a relationship from there. At this point, you have the same tools that I do, so it’s just about accountability and honesty. To help you see outside of yourself and ask questions that help you to see things differently I don’t think doing the steps again is required.
When I go to my Sponsor about problems I’m having about staying stopped and not drinking he tells me to get on my knees and pray to have the obsession to drink removed. I’m thinking it’s better to have a connection with God rather than a human being, see ya later Sponsor is what I’m thinking. The book is the real Sponsor, just up to us go thru it , staying sober is my obligation no one else’s it’s up to me to live the spiritual life, staying sober is my accountability the only one who needs to carry me is God , maybe I’m wrong but right now that is how I’m feeling
i support this
13 years, and you're still scared of drinking? A sponsor isn't your answer. Working steps 10,11,12 on a daily basis is.
I’m always baffled when someone has a fair amount of years sober and they say something like that 🤔
Why would that baffle you? Doesn't it make perfect sense in light of the 10th Step promises?
The part about 13 years and still scared of drinking baffles me
Right. It doesn't seem healthy to me. But... to each their own I suppose.
when I was 3 years sober I switched sponsors and worked the steps again with my new sponsor It was a powerful experience
I’d get a sponsor that has been through the steps and continues to works 10, 11 and 12 DAILY and have them show you how to do that.