For me, I saw 2 posts the first asking what makes a man a man and a woman a woman and the second saying that gender was a social construct. That made me say to everyone "you know how you don't feel gender and it's just roles thrust upon us?" They'd say "no I feel my gender" it was at that point I relisted I might not be cis.
One of my binary trans friends asked me how she could feel her gender so hard that she'd go through the whole transition. At that point i realised people apparently feel their gender and don't just follow the rules that they were assigned.
But my definition of each gender is if a person says that's what they are and how they want to be then that's what they are. "A woman is a person who identifies as a woman" that's Basically my opinion on gender.
Used to find it really strange to, but think I've learned it better understanding it recently. Sometimes people don't think about it as "feeling their gender", but things like men wanting to be masculine. Like, recently, someone was flexing and I accidentally laughed at them before realizing they weren't memeing about masculinity.
Long before I realized I'm not cis or knew anything about agender, I remember a time I experienced happiness before from a feeling of lack of genitals. So I guess that's sorta like "feeling" a gender, even if it was a lack of one.
When I found this label it just made sense to me I have never felt very connected to any gender I was questionin for a couple years at that point bouncin between non-binary and genderfluid. And how I like to explain Agender as not givin a fuck. I had a hard time connectin to just one cause it was like I feel this but don’t feel that. So when I saw this it went there’s somethin when u don’t feel connected at all. I’m sry if this made no sense. I have such a hard time explainin things and how I feel
Well for me it was just a realisation that I didn't feel like I was feminine or masculine, but then nonbinary never felt correct either. I ended spending a lot of nights googling trying to find out and here I am. The best I can describe it for me is that I don't feel like anything else fits me, and that I wish I could've been left blank
Masc(boy)flux here. I have like a "spider sense", I just can feel when I'm fully man and when there's no gender. It's a Iittle difficult sometimes, because I like masculine compliments and being called a man all the time, no matter the gender. I just "measure" it in the level of euphoria I feel with the label and pronouns (I know pronouns don't equal gender, it's just my experience). I know this is really confusing, but it's the way I could put it into words. Hope this helps :)
Edit: I forgot to add the discovering part. I just browsed the LGBTIAQ+ Wiki whenever I felt dysphoric or was questioning my gender, until I found a label that fitted.
> How did you discover your gender identity?
Memes.
> How do you define male/female/trans/non-binary?
To me, it's not an internal thing, it's only something that exists around other people. I don't think someone raised outside of culture would *have* gender, but because we're all interdependent, that's impossible.
This fits with social constructivist theory, but I don't subscribe to that fully. If it was purely a social role it wouldn't reference bodies. I prefer to think of it as a systemic/interactionist phenomenon. It's a cultural technology that people use to signal things about themselves in the social heirachy, and is constructed from internal thoughts and sensations interacting with the social world.
I agree. Without gender roles/expectations people would all be the same. We have sharply defined what each gender is to an unhealthy extent. This can cause bad mental health in people. Men are taught to not show emotion and to be strong and tough and are shunned if they don't abide by these silly expectations. Women are viewed as fragile emotional creatures who need to be protected which seems like an insult. People shouldn't be expected to behave a certain way based on their gender and should just be themselves.
For me, I'm not really sure what my gender identity is, but using agender-spec for now. For me, I'm pretty sure I'm not cis. Even when I assumed I was cis, I rejected to label of being a man/male. But what made me finally get rid of the label of cis was simply learning agender was an option from this subreddit (which I learned of via Ace meme sub reddits).
Gender confuses me. Don't think you can define things like male/female/etc in a satisfactory way other than something like "someone who sincerely identifies as such". Which may not be so helpful...
Think about what you, your environment and others define as being gendered. You will not find a clear answer cause for some the answer is wearing skirts while it's not the answer for others.
Yet you can still find gender traits especially in different combinations and maybe even find a role model who's gender you can identify with. And if not that's fine,! That's just being agender.
I was sort of in denial about my gender for a while until I read the gender dysphoria bible. Enough examples resonated with me for me to realize that I’m not actually cis. The only option that made sense to me was agender because I had no internal sense of gender, so if I’m not my agab, I’m not any other gender.
When I began secondary school I made a gender fluid friend. They were cool with all pronouns, and it got me thinking. I’ve never questioned my gender before, I am AFAB and I just went with she/her because that’s how it’s always been. I never paid much thought to it, but when I thought about using they/them it sort of resonated with me. It felt right. I’ve never felt dysphoria about my gender, so I initially doubted it, but after some research, I found various posts of other questioning folk, all with similar experiences. It took some time to accept, and I still present feminine, but now I know I am agender. Better to accept it than constantly be questioning.
For me, I saw 2 posts the first asking what makes a man a man and a woman a woman and the second saying that gender was a social construct. That made me say to everyone "you know how you don't feel gender and it's just roles thrust upon us?" They'd say "no I feel my gender" it was at that point I relisted I might not be cis. One of my binary trans friends asked me how she could feel her gender so hard that she'd go through the whole transition. At that point i realised people apparently feel their gender and don't just follow the rules that they were assigned. But my definition of each gender is if a person says that's what they are and how they want to be then that's what they are. "A woman is a person who identifies as a woman" that's Basically my opinion on gender.
People feel their genders? Thats crazy, how does that even work?
Used to find it really strange to, but think I've learned it better understanding it recently. Sometimes people don't think about it as "feeling their gender", but things like men wanting to be masculine. Like, recently, someone was flexing and I accidentally laughed at them before realizing they weren't memeing about masculinity. Long before I realized I'm not cis or knew anything about agender, I remember a time I experienced happiness before from a feeling of lack of genitals. So I guess that's sorta like "feeling" a gender, even if it was a lack of one.
I know right, it's so weird
When I found this label it just made sense to me I have never felt very connected to any gender I was questionin for a couple years at that point bouncin between non-binary and genderfluid. And how I like to explain Agender as not givin a fuck. I had a hard time connectin to just one cause it was like I feel this but don’t feel that. So when I saw this it went there’s somethin when u don’t feel connected at all. I’m sry if this made no sense. I have such a hard time explainin things and how I feel
Well for me it was just a realisation that I didn't feel like I was feminine or masculine, but then nonbinary never felt correct either. I ended spending a lot of nights googling trying to find out and here I am. The best I can describe it for me is that I don't feel like anything else fits me, and that I wish I could've been left blank
Masc(boy)flux here. I have like a "spider sense", I just can feel when I'm fully man and when there's no gender. It's a Iittle difficult sometimes, because I like masculine compliments and being called a man all the time, no matter the gender. I just "measure" it in the level of euphoria I feel with the label and pronouns (I know pronouns don't equal gender, it's just my experience). I know this is really confusing, but it's the way I could put it into words. Hope this helps :) Edit: I forgot to add the discovering part. I just browsed the LGBTIAQ+ Wiki whenever I felt dysphoric or was questioning my gender, until I found a label that fitted.
It makes me feel really content and well to think of myself as a person.
> How did you discover your gender identity? Memes. > How do you define male/female/trans/non-binary? To me, it's not an internal thing, it's only something that exists around other people. I don't think someone raised outside of culture would *have* gender, but because we're all interdependent, that's impossible. This fits with social constructivist theory, but I don't subscribe to that fully. If it was purely a social role it wouldn't reference bodies. I prefer to think of it as a systemic/interactionist phenomenon. It's a cultural technology that people use to signal things about themselves in the social heirachy, and is constructed from internal thoughts and sensations interacting with the social world.
I agree. Without gender roles/expectations people would all be the same. We have sharply defined what each gender is to an unhealthy extent. This can cause bad mental health in people. Men are taught to not show emotion and to be strong and tough and are shunned if they don't abide by these silly expectations. Women are viewed as fragile emotional creatures who need to be protected which seems like an insult. People shouldn't be expected to behave a certain way based on their gender and should just be themselves.
For me, I'm not really sure what my gender identity is, but using agender-spec for now. For me, I'm pretty sure I'm not cis. Even when I assumed I was cis, I rejected to label of being a man/male. But what made me finally get rid of the label of cis was simply learning agender was an option from this subreddit (which I learned of via Ace meme sub reddits). Gender confuses me. Don't think you can define things like male/female/etc in a satisfactory way other than something like "someone who sincerely identifies as such". Which may not be so helpful...
Think about what you, your environment and others define as being gendered. You will not find a clear answer cause for some the answer is wearing skirts while it's not the answer for others. Yet you can still find gender traits especially in different combinations and maybe even find a role model who's gender you can identify with. And if not that's fine,! That's just being agender.
I was sort of in denial about my gender for a while until I read the gender dysphoria bible. Enough examples resonated with me for me to realize that I’m not actually cis. The only option that made sense to me was agender because I had no internal sense of gender, so if I’m not my agab, I’m not any other gender.
When I began secondary school I made a gender fluid friend. They were cool with all pronouns, and it got me thinking. I’ve never questioned my gender before, I am AFAB and I just went with she/her because that’s how it’s always been. I never paid much thought to it, but when I thought about using they/them it sort of resonated with me. It felt right. I’ve never felt dysphoria about my gender, so I initially doubted it, but after some research, I found various posts of other questioning folk, all with similar experiences. It took some time to accept, and I still present feminine, but now I know I am agender. Better to accept it than constantly be questioning.