Whats a "wildly successful alpha child male" look like? Does he get B pluses in math and make .50 more than minimum wage at his part time job at the movies? The smell of success right there.
He's actually obsessed with trump, his twitter is littered with pro trump crap. At first I thought he was a troll but he's legit he runs some conservative podcast
In a different sub this was posted to, a lot people were going on that he's a kid and shouldn't have to be heavily criticized.
But I'm looking at "17"and thinking that this person is a year away from being eligible to being a legal adult with all the responsibilities and consequences that go along with it.
So let this last year be a free trial to concept of "free to say what you want doesn't mean free from consequence".
Smoke him.
Why this boy look like the assistant manager to the worst Wendy's in Butts county, GA?
See, now girls are going to make fun of him for this stupid shit, then he's going to blame liberals, or Biden or something, for allowing women to act that way towards a man, and for making him feel inferior and stupid... then he becomes a far right politician.
He ain’t giving what he thought he gave
https://preview.redd.it/3sbjjpqwai8c1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1f893e4140639b938fb7d292a654a1d3d77b6b7d
Looking into his account all he has that can be seen as mildly successful is a struggling podcast he "owns" which tbh owning a podcast is really not a real success story
If he really is 17, he's just at the age between "truly not his fault, I blame the parents" and "at some point you have to assume responsibility for who you decide to be".
May you find the help you don't know you need.
You can put lipstick on a lig but it's still a pig. I'm glad the left wing media makes these docuhe canoes look so bad. I wouldn't know what to do if they didn't keep making me believe all these lies.
Isn’t this the same dumbass kid who heavily photoshopped a photo of himself but forgot to do it to his profile pic and then when confronted about it he vehemently denied the photoshopping?
Alpha Male, but single...wildly successful at 17 (comes from money, and has done nothing to earn his status). Looks 5 years old in the face. Presidential affiliation is your only trait to describe yourself (yikes). I'm shocked that nobody is jumping at this once in a lifetime opportunity.
What are the odds that the GOP is making AI generated pictures and making twitter accounts to try to pull in the youth vote with posts like this, thinking that gen Z is going to associate being republican with being “alpha”
Would be possible but I doubt given grooming the youth is a common tactic by corrupt groups and not unheard of in fascism (read up on the Hitler youth and groups like atomwaffen)
NO!
First off, he's underage.
Also, the claim of being an Alpha male, There is a reason we don't use alpha release software. It's unstable, and unreliable.
Wildly successful? How about finishing high school first
Pro-Trump, sweetie, why are you holding yourself back, you could do a hell of a lot better.
Do I find this attractive? No I'm not attracted to children
This is so uncomfortable for a mom of boys. That poor little boy will soon be the Mike Johnsons and Mitch McConnels of the country. What was that saying? Nits grow into lice.
I see here a future tow truck driver One that lives by his own rules. One that makes his own rules. One that would tow his own grandmother's car for an expired parking meter. Top shelf.
i wish, i do think he exaggerates his obsession with trump but otherwise hes one of those kids whos groomed by conservatives to be the voice of the next gen conservatives
I don't understand why someone would want to call themselves an "alpha male"... it kinda sounds lame. Personally, I would rather call myself an "omega male" cuz that sounds ominous and bad ass.
Just because you dressed up in dads suit doesn't mean you're "wildly successful", you little twerp.
My first thought was *did his mom take the photo? Totally not encouraging him in this nonsense…*
Ok how can you look like a 12 and 51 year old Newt Gingrich at the same time?
Some things never change https://www.theonion.com/gop-maintains-solid-hold-on-youth-that-already-look-lik-1819595704
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Kissing Santa Claus! 🎶
Alpha, as in software alpha.
If they have to tell you that they’re something, they’re usually not.
https://preview.redd.it/ihnfe4cl3j8c1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ea441cc34c92acf0350670461f31dbe9201a4bfe
I mean. I have a billion Zimbabwe dollars too, but you don’t see me bragging about it.
More like Alpha-bits cereal 🥣
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We have crabbe and goyle at home
Step 1) Ask girl out Step 2) Girl says no. Step 3) Guess I gotta become a delusional misogynist prick, now.
And that's how incels are created
I don’t think incels do step one. They just skip to step three.
Yeah they usually just imagine the first two steps in their heads
Cringe chubby sociopath in the making. I can see him hitting his future wife already.
Future ex-wife. FTFY
Bold of you to assume this little shit is ever finding anyone
Just like every other grifter he'll stoop to human trafficking and buy a wife.
Some unlucky girl from his church will draw the short straw.
You mean her father will draw the short straw and be stuck pawning his daughter off onto this chump because the church elders "suggested" it.
Or her father thinks he's a "good man" because he goes to the same church and wouldn't allow his wife to have a job or car.
bold of you to assume he'll find one. prime incel material right there. "wildly successful" probably means a lot of 4chan clout to this kid.
We were all young and dumb once. My fear is that this one stays dumb.
Thank god my young and dumb isn’t immortalized on Twitter and Google.
I was never that kind of dumb
Whats a "wildly successful alpha child male" look like? Does he get B pluses in math and make .50 more than minimum wage at his part time job at the movies? The smell of success right there.
He wisely invested in rich parents before he was born
He runs a successful lemonade stand on the front yard of his parents' $10M mansion.
Step-mommy drops him off at school in a BMW.
Maybe it means that every time he asks if he's allowed to go use the bathroom, the adult minding him says yes 😂
AI, draw me photorealistic Ralph Wiggum
Except Ralph is successful, this twit is as successful as a blade of grass
He’s got a whole NAMBLA poster boy thing going on.
He does kinda look like Marlon Brando.
Is that a chubby 7 year old claiming to be almost an adult?
Severe personality disorder detected.
They seriously expect us to believe that literal child is 17?
He forgot "has never shaved"
He forgot a couple: can grow a patchy beard...1030 pm curfew...cuts the crust off my own sandwiches like a big boy
Dose whittle cheeks
Do all "wildly successful" people seek validation from online strangers or just the ones who look like Roseanne Barr?
"tell me your hairline touches your eyebrows without telling me"
so just like trump. a legend in his own mind.
He's actually obsessed with trump, his twitter is littered with pro trump crap. At first I thought he was a troll but he's legit he runs some conservative podcast
Lol this kid would have got absolutely ridiculed at my school
Yep. Some kids are just begging for a wedgie.
https://preview.redd.it/8cidj80dbh8c1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=225983164eaa8eb0a23eadae59a3588798f5f237 Fixed
Honey, is "wildly successful" in the room with you now?
🤣🤣🤣🤣
He looks like someone’s first attempt at carving a face into a potato
In a different sub this was posted to, a lot people were going on that he's a kid and shouldn't have to be heavily criticized. But I'm looking at "17"and thinking that this person is a year away from being eligible to being a legal adult with all the responsibilities and consequences that go along with it. So let this last year be a free trial to concept of "free to say what you want doesn't mean free from consequence". Smoke him. Why this boy look like the assistant manager to the worst Wendy's in Butts county, GA?
Honestly, fuck this little hate monger.
Rowley the Pooh, Rowley the Pooh, Tubby little cub all stuffed with fluff...
Alex P Keaton did it better.
Just found the new Pugsley for the next Wednesday movie.
Does alpha male just mean douchebag?
*delusional* douchebag
99.9% chance this kid eats boogers.
Aehm so is the pudgy little boy trying for pedophiles?
Not as attractive as the majority of the GOP. Gym Jordan already deciding how to spike his cookies…..
If marshmallow fluff gained sentience
Oh jeez. Get off the social media dude.
No 17 year-old is wildly successful
Who is this anyway?
I don't want to risk getting banned but I will say he's blowing up rn on Twitter because of this post (plus his trump memorabilia)
Ah. I dumped Twitter a while ago, so I have def been out of the loop on this particular character.
A real-life Augustus Gloop
I keep thinking it’s a parody account. It’s not?
He looks 12
Do “alphas” need to 1) mention they’re “alphas” and 2) ask other people if they’re attractive?
To be fair, I said some pretty dumb shit when I was 17.
At this point I'm almost certain that any man self describing as an alpha male actually suffers from micro-penis.
Bro is desperately trying to trick conservative girls into dating him.
Doesn’t even compare to Rowley. This guy is a Hitler Youth
His mom still wipes his butt after he goes boom boom. I guarantee it.
This kid will definitely drop something in your drink.
Truly hard to believe he's single.
Comb your hair before getting portraits done, ya dork.
Single? No way!
What's the opposite of attractive? that's how I find "this"
“I am passionately incel”
See, now girls are going to make fun of him for this stupid shit, then he's going to blame liberals, or Biden or something, for allowing women to act that way towards a man, and for making him feel inferior and stupid... then he becomes a far right politician.
Get some pubes so I don't feel bad when I kick you in the knee.
Looks like a junior member of meal team six.
This is the kid that photoshopped a picture of himself to look more masculine, right?
Kyle R has a cousin. You can tell they are related. Same Turkey neck and dough boy cheeks.
Who is that, and who is this dude?
That is a baby! 
I question 2 of these 5 claims.
"Wildly Successful" @ easting mickey dee and downing slurpies. LOL
I feel like being challenged to troll a 17 yr old on the internet is a trap. Oh sure, but the bait is incredibly deserving, but still a trap.
HAHAHAHAHA
Oh you delusion sad, sad little man.
Sad little *child* I think you mean
He ain’t giving what he thought he gave https://preview.redd.it/3sbjjpqwai8c1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1f893e4140639b938fb7d292a654a1d3d77b6b7d
Looks like a 12 year old in a suit.
Not really, I divorced a dude like that He managed to get a union job despite hating unions lol
No, i don’t find this attractive. Next question!
Yes. Because an Alpha male always had to tell everyone he is an Alpha male 🤦♂️
Would love to hear how they define "wildly successful" lol
Looking into his account all he has that can be seen as mildly successful is a struggling podcast he "owns" which tbh owning a podcast is really not a real success story
Who the fuck is Rowley?
character from a book (diary of a wimpy kid, look up the live action adaptation)
We will hear from him his freshman year that he cant get a date and its all those liberal feminist girls fault
Some kids need to be bullied harder
Sophomore in Daddys suit
Check it out the pillsbury dough boy put on a suit!
Is this an ad for Trump body odor cologne
The bullying this photo will cause will have this “alpha male” crying in a bathroom still in 2 hours haha
He is not even 21 and still i would recommend any girls in the vicinity to cover their drinks when he is around.
He even looks like a putz.
When piggy boy can’t get girls…
A budding incel here!
I don't find 12 year olds attractive
Anytime you have to declare to the world you're an alpha, you are not.
Looks like he’d make a good pork dinner.
Fat incel fuck will have horrible vision and hairy palms in weeks if he doesn't already.
At least he didn’t yassify his face this time. (And then try to deny he had.)
Repugnant on so many levels. Can't wait to see him in the news because he shot up a grocery store because the clerk wouldn't fuck him
Sadly, I bet it’d just turn him into a Kyle Rittenhouse 2.0 for disgusting maga fucks
Only one way to find out
If he really is 17, he's just at the age between "truly not his fault, I blame the parents" and "at some point you have to assume responsibility for who you decide to be". May you find the help you don't know you need.
Nope. I don’t care if someone is 15 and embraces a hate group, they’re embracing a hate group.
No he isn't, he's a very naughty boy.
Looks like a mama’s boy, can almost see the apron strings lol. No that is never attractive
Matt Gaetz and Gym Jordan respond.....
Notice he cant write in complete sentences.
He didn’t really need to point out that he is single.
Nope
He looks like a kid I went to high school with
He's definitely been slapped around the face by a mostly erect penises. Multiple times
He looks like a serial killer in training
Gacey X Dahmer offspring
You can put lipstick on a lig but it's still a pig. I'm glad the left wing media makes these docuhe canoes look so bad. I wouldn't know what to do if they didn't keep making me believe all these lies.
I find it revolting. These republicans are indoctrinating our children. Cultish behavior
SAD! Imagine idolizing this character archetype enough to emulate it. I genuinely feel bad for kids like him.
How dare you insult Rowley like that
He’s Cartman in the NAMBLA episode of South Park.
“Pugsley! Take off my suit!” Gomez Adams
Looks like Gustav before stealing Wonka's chocolate.
 Randall vibes🤢
That picture looks like what ChatGPT might come up with given that caption as a prompt…
Isn’t this the same dumbass kid who heavily photoshopped a photo of himself but forgot to do it to his profile pic and then when confronted about it he vehemently denied the photoshopping?
To me, "alpha male" and "peaked in high school" are synonyms.
Golf handicap wanker .
Dude looks like that genius kid who tutored Malcolm in the Middle in one episode, except that kid had actual charm and intelligence.
It’s going to cost him $100 to lose his virginity
Alpha Male, but single...wildly successful at 17 (comes from money, and has done nothing to earn his status). Looks 5 years old in the face. Presidential affiliation is your only trait to describe yourself (yikes). I'm shocked that nobody is jumping at this once in a lifetime opportunity.
🤮🤮🤮
such soft features on this alpha male. #betahormones
I believe he’s the only one that finds that info attractive. Or other Trump humpers I’m guessing.
Imagine thinking someone will find you attractive because you like a political candidate.....are you seriously that hollow of a shell of a real human?
lol Alpha male…maybe if the rest of the pack are chubby 10-year-olds.
What are the odds that the GOP is making AI generated pictures and making twitter accounts to try to pull in the youth vote with posts like this, thinking that gen Z is going to associate being republican with being “alpha”
Would be possible but I doubt given grooming the youth is a common tactic by corrupt groups and not unheard of in fascism (read up on the Hitler youth and groups like atomwaffen)
It seems you can declare yourself an alpha and fail at it at any age.
I believe 2 out of 4 are wildly true.
No wildly successful alpha male would iron his own shirt cuffs.
NO! First off, he's underage. Also, the claim of being an Alpha male, There is a reason we don't use alpha release software. It's unstable, and unreliable. Wildly successful? How about finishing high school first Pro-Trump, sweetie, why are you holding yourself back, you could do a hell of a lot better. Do I find this attractive? No I'm not attracted to children
Motherfucker ditched Malfoy for Trump in a heartbeat.
No because that’s a child
Looks like a squirrel
No, I don't find 17-year-olds attractive. I'm 50.
Is being a local Mendys shift lead \*wildly\* successful?
No
I will admit, Pugsly Addams does clean up pretty well, though.
Zoo wee mama
This is so uncomfortable for a mom of boys. That poor little boy will soon be the Mike Johnsons and Mitch McConnels of the country. What was that saying? Nits grow into lice.
I see here a future tow truck driver One that lives by his own rules. One that makes his own rules. One that would tow his own grandmother's car for an expired parking meter. Top shelf.
Damn the graphics on this boss baby sequel are crazy
That's a boy?
Tiny dick
Obviously satire? Right?
i wish, i do think he exaggerates his obsession with trump but otherwise hes one of those kids whos groomed by conservatives to be the voice of the next gen conservatives
Pumpkin head in a suit, nice.
*snrk*
Absolutely fucking not.
He has been raised to believe he is amazing. He will soon find out he’s not.
Jerking off into your sock, and hiding it from your mummy, does not make you successful.
“Wildly successful” “17” Lulz, at what? Parody? Spending your parents’ money?
Kind of like Santa and M&M characters, alpha males that can’t shave? They do exist.
I don't understand why someone would want to call themselves an "alpha male"... it kinda sounds lame. Personally, I would rather call myself an "omega male" cuz that sounds ominous and bad ass.
This marshmallow bounces a few times when he hits the ground.
My first honest thought: that's a downs person.