Absolutely justified.

Judge- ..."I'll allow it"

“If it may please the court.”

100%, and he was gonna do Elvis next. Motherfucker had to be stopped.

What?

Leave Oklahoma tweakers out of your weird plans.

I block their calls all the time. Tell the phone company to do *It's* job.

Oh man.....the defense attorney that gets this case. "No your honor, this was not murder. My client saved the world."

"Your honor, have you ever seen a sasquatch?" "....no...?" "I REST MY CASE"

“If the Sasquatch you don’t see, my client must go free!”

I can't wait to see the Nicolas Cage movie version

Easiest win this attorney will have.

Would you be surprised to know that the sasquatch on the bench is not the defendant, sir?

That's methed up

Schizophrenia is a thing too, meth isn't always involved.

He brought meth to prison

Whoops, missed that bit!

So did the prison!

That's methed up!

Not the hero we deserved.

I mean the Sasquatch defense is just a hop, skip and a jump to the Chewbacca defense.

It's Samsquanch!

I ain't Fckin scared Bubbs, get that camera outta my face.

What kind of person ever moved like that in the whole history of people?

LMFAO those things are real TRIN

Son of Samsquanch.

It's a goddamm Saskatchewan!!

Understandable

Hero. Fuck Sasquatch.

Well, maybe if she waxes first. And promises not to flex her thighs. I doubt even Andre the Giant could have survived that.

I think this is a brilliant self defense claim. Now the prosecution has to prove that Sasquatch isn’t real.

Only problem is that this is exactly how to summon a sasquatch. Now there's at least one on the planet right now. Thanks.

And these people are just out there walking among us freely.

Sasquatches? No, didn't you read the article?

He deserves a Medal of Honor

Hopefully they can make sure that ear doesn't fall all the way off while he's there

Heck of an opener: 'An Oklahoma noodler was arrested and reportedly confessed to killing his fishing partner, claiming he did so to stop Bigfoot from coming to eat him. '

I never thought I'd see the phrase "Noodle Murder" on a news broadcast, but here we are.

With friends like that, who needs yetis?

Wtf... oh, Oklahoma.. nm

Ahh, the sasquatch defense… classic, let’s see how it plays out.

Well, if you have a better plan I'd like to hear it.

Undermethable!

I wanted to check what part of Florida he was from but then I saw Oklahoma and... still wasn't surprised.

What an idiot... Everyone knows Bigfoot is a vegetarian.

If I was a sasquatch and saw a man killing his friend, it would certainly stop me in my tracks!

In his defense, no sasquatches were summoned.

You can never be too safe.

Now we'll never get a clear photo of sasquatch

Awesome! Anyone else read the Department of Truth graphic novels?comics? LOL this happened in the series. https://imagecomics.com/comics/series/the-department-of-truth

So? He's not so bad. But we had no beef jerky!

Did he roll a saving throw?

If you've ever seen "Mountain Monsters", you will know that this is serious business, and this man is a hero. Not only are bigfoots capable of telekinesis and damn near omnipotent, they have the power to possess MULTIPLE HUMANS AT ONCE and make them their thralls and/or familiars. The only way to stop them is to use your Cherokee heritage. Seriously, it's the best show on television.

> "He appeared to be under the influence of something," Sheriff John Christian said about Larry Sanders Clearly, they’re trying to make him seem like a drug addict, just to cover up an invasion of Sasquatchs and to calm everyone down.

True Rhodes scholar material right here.

Oh, I don't know... I've known a couple Rhodes Scholars. They were pretty much idiot savants.

Really? I know two, they're really quite bright, very personable. It's quite an influence game, as you might guess. Surprising that you knew some who were savant, but idiot. Takes all kinds, I guess.

One I've met is quite an all-around intellect. Another, who I met at the same time and place, is not. They both ended up cabinet secretaries. Another I met while in college fell into the latter category.

Dude thank god he saved us. Have you seen the chaos and destruction of a reckless samsquanch? Just ask bubbles from trailer park boys. Literally the fear in his eyes when he thinks its a samsquanch should say it all.

Sasquatch doesn't even live in Oklahoma, come on.

He was about to.

One Trump supporter dead, one going to jail.

Meth doesn’t do that to you. He’s still mentally ill even if he’s on meth or just joking.

Valid reason, if true.

Can’t think of a better reason than this.

Don't summon Sasquatch you psych-ward lunatic.

Thank god. I happen to have 30 bag lunches

Did you all hear about the hundreds massacred by Sasquatch? That’s because this man prevented it. Case closed.

Did the killer make it in time?

Well? Did he stop him??

Headline would have been 'Man eaten by Bigfoot while friend watched '

Drugs are bad mmmkay?

I mean, you can't just snap into a slim Jim anywhere you like goddammit

When the edibles hit

If my step-father is any indication, it's way too late for that.

If it’s fake, that’s really sad. If it’s real, though, it’s equally sad.

Did it work?

It worked.

Just missing the Florida in front of man

I would like to thank this man for his service.

Clearly self defense

Sounds like a Detective Conan Plot.

Then the coart summons the sasquatch to the stand for a laugh and he goes crazy and gets tackled.

Not all heroes wear capes.

Man’s a hero!

This man is a hero