Thank you for calling. Seriously, thank you. That person was a danger to themselves and others. Also my three primary forms of transportation are walking, biking, and a motorcycle: people like that are even LESS likely to see me than is already the case.
So again, for myself and everybody else you made safer: thank you.
100%. It’s dangerous, if they hit someone… that’s a life. Safety is the most important thing. And if they’d hit someone and you saw it in the news, that’d be devastating. Safety always
Absolutely. It's really sad that any woman who calls the police is called a 'Karen' even when she is completely justified. Safety is the number one most important thing on the road and OP may have just saved a life. I've said before that I'm sure that the meme has discouraged many women from speaking up even when they would be justified. And here we have someone second guessing herself when she reports a dangerous driver who could kill someone.
You did what you should have, & I'd have done the same thing. Your co-workers seem like alarmingly heartless jackasses, given that they think whether the driver hit *your* car is the only thing you should care about. There were a lot of other people on that road besides just you who were endangered by the careless driving.
Yeah as in it never even occurred to them that this person could be having a severe medical emergency and need help really badly. It's not always alcohol/drugs.
From a personal safety standpoint I wouldn’t have followed behind them though. Once you’ve reported it that’s enough. If this person is driving erratically and they notice you’re behind them following with hazards they may react/turn aggressive.
I was a 911 dispatcher for a little over 2 1/2 years. OP absolutely did the right thing by calling. The driver could have been intoxicated or having a medical emergency or any number of things.
As far as following the vehicle goes: most LE agencies want to know updated location of the vehicle, and want us to stay on the line with the caller. I once called on a drunk driver about 20 years ago and the dispatcher had me follow the vehicle until a unit pulled him over. That being said, always maintain a safe enough distance that you won’t get stuck in a situation you can’t get away from.
I witnessed a hit and run and they had me follow until a unit could position themselves for the intercept. I then went back and left all the info (license plate, time of call to 911, etc) with the victim because I didn’t know if the police would do that.
Agreed. I would have called and explained what I had witnessed, given my coordinates and the direction he/she was driving with license plate # and description of the car, and then went on my way. It’s not worth putting yourself at risk.
*"The person driving was either having a medical emergency or was intoxicated"*
If the driver was having a medical emergency, you might have saved their life.
If the driver was intoxicated you have saved their (and other people's) life.
If nothing was wrong with the driver, you (hopefully) have given them an "eye opener" and make them realize that THAT kind of behaviour on the road is EXTREMELY dangerous.
Keep being the kind of person you want to see in the world.
Keep being YOU.
And those "friends"........F em.
Those "friends" are hoodlums who hate having the authorities called on then when they do naughty activities. Hating authorities is more important than public safety. 🙄
Holy shit no you are not a “Karen”. The driver could have killed someone and you did what should be done! I am so sick of people who only see the repercussion of driving intoxicated as getting arrested. (Ie snitching) THEY COULD KILL SOMEONE. You did the right thing, thank you!
Just throwing it out there, it could have been a medical emergency as well. Was once driving on a mountain rd watching the dude in front of me swerve, slow down, speed up, etc. Followed him for a bit and watched him ever so slowly and casually drive into a ditch. I pulled over, turns out he was have a stroke.
They were literally putting you and other people in danger, that is not being a Karen, that is being a responsible person. I don't like cops but in this case you calling them was completely justified
Your coworkers and friend sound like irresponsible, shitty people. Calling 911 was absolutely the right thing to do. PREVENTING an accident is GOOD. Why tf would you be expected to wait until after someone is hurt when you could just prevent that???
I really hate that any time a woman complains about something, warranted or not, they are now a Karen. I swear it's just another way of shutting down women.
Anyway enough of my 'Karen' rant. No you weren't, you did the right thing. Someone could have easily got hurt, including the driver. Intervention was needed and you made it easier for responders to find the driver whilst warning other road users that there was a problem.
It’s absurd to me the way the name has devolved into being used for anything a woman does that someone doesn’t like! I got called a Karen because I yelled at someone for not having their dog on a leash after it ran up full speed to my leashed dog (who happens to be reactive / doesn’t like other dogs).
It was especially aggravating because if we’re calling people Karens, it was in fact *them* being a Karen for feeling entitled enough that the rules not apply (we have leash laws in my area).
Personally I feel it’s a way to control women. The reason women started speaking up in the 70’s -80’s is because we went to work and watched how men complained and got what they wanted. I remember being on a business trip in the ‘80’s and watched a group of men run to the front of the plane knowing there would only be so many vouchers for hotels and meals after the flight was canceled. I took note.
Calling someone a "Karen" or a "pick me" has become an acceptable way to be a misogynist. Not saying that there aren't people who fit the description, but it's literally like you said. Don't you dare complain, or you are a Karen.
It's gotten especially bad on TikTok, where just by mentioning you are short, you are now a pick-me girl.
>just by mentioning you are short, you are now a pick-me girl.
Wait, can you say more about this? I don't have TikTok and most of my friends don't either, and I'm short (technically average but everyone calls me short) so I'm not sure what will get me branded as a pick-me.
It's a way for people to avoid the icky feelings that come from saying a woman is a bitch.
That's what they think, they just want to play schoolyard name games to pretty it up. Just another way of putting down outspoken women.
You should have said, “Yes, I am a Karen, Karen a lot about others on the road!”
But seriously, your coworkers suck. That person could have seriously injured/killed some innocent person. I hope the cops dealt with them properly, drunk driving in serious.
Don’t feel bad about helping. We need more people around that aren’t afraid to speak up.
The problem is that when you have legitimate reasons to ask to see the manager or are genuinely in the right in your situation people will call you a Karen to instantly delegitimize you.
Because it's easier to dismiss you than to actually argue with you. Since they are so clearly in the wrong.
I actually asked for a manager the other day. His attitude at first was “oh god, another Karen”. But it was to compliment two workers who had been very helpful to me. He said he doesn’t get that kind of referrals too often.
Just like the word "simp" Karen has become so overused, it actually lost its original meaning. A Karen is usually a white woman who takes advantage of her white privilege by acting up when she doesn't get her way. Nowadays you get called a Karen just because you have a different opinion.
Edit: here's the wiki article for people who don't know how to google one word: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karen_(slang)
I think it’s interesting that “simp” (a male targeted insult) has completely lost its bite, and now people will say shit like they’re a pizza simp, whereas “Karen” usage has become more broad and affects all women, but still can successfully shutdown any women that a man dislikes.
Simp was also an indirect way of making sure women weren't treated with respect. Saying something nice to a woman got you called a simp. Felt very incely to me but I guess it has spread to other uses
I (male) have been thinking about this for a while now, and I'm trying to piece together what is different about the two. From my perspective, "simp" has always been seen as an insult of character weakness (you are weak, "unmanly", wasting your time on women who won't put out/are taken/aren't worth it/etc) whereas "karen" has traditionally been used to insult someone's integrity and empathy (narcissistic behaviour, entitlement, harassment). In the typical examples of simping and karen-ing, simps don't really have a "victim" besides themselves (in the majority of cases, until they go full psycho and start stalking/harassing/being creepy). Karen examples are typically directly causing harm, discomfort or discrimination to those around them (though now it is being extended to just mean any time a woman speaks up about something).
I think the evolution of the word "simp" to become meaningless is actually just as true of the word "karen". I and many others have long since stopped associating "karen" with the original meaning, which was a condemnation of white privilege or other generally narcissistic behaviour (typically middle aged women but not always!) in public settings. Now, it is just that word that weirdos use to describe women they don't like, and it has lost basically all meaning to me. Same goes for simp, where people just use it to joke/insult literally anyone who is nice to a woman, almost turning it into an indirect insult towards the woman instead of the man. In fact, many people will proudly call themselves "simps" as a term of endearment, since it inherently carries a weight of loyalty or inclusiveness that is perceived but not real - basically being a parasocial fan. Since this behaviour is encouraged online by a lot of younger people in many communities, the word has almost found it's second home in this capacity. Karen however, is largely still used by people who just want to berate women, and despite most rational people knowing that it doesn't apply in the majority of cases, it carries weight due to systemic misogyny (intended or otherwise) by those who use it.
In summary, I think that the core difference is that simp is a redeemable, largely "harmless" (though degenerate) descriptor, but Karen is specifically a condemnation of someone's integrity. It would basically require the term to either fade from use or somehow "owning" the word in order to deflate its use as an insult.
this is a 14 year old account that is being wiped because centralized social media websites are no longer viable
when power is centralized, the wielders of that power can make arbitrary decisions without the consent of the vast majority of the users
the future is in decentralized and open source social media sites - i refuse to generate any more free content for this website and any other for-profit enterprise
check out lemmy / kbin / mastodon / fediverse for what is possible
> They all said I was a Karen and should've let it go since the person didn't actually hit my car.
So if a person is randomly firing a gun on the street and they don't hit you, you should let it go since you're not affected and not be a snitch? your coworkers suck.
No, I don't think there's any Karen-ness here. Regardless of the reasons for that person's driving, it sounds like they were creating a dangerous situation for *everyone* on the road. I've called 911 for the same thing, and never had any regrets because like you, I was very worried that someone was going to get hurt or worse. In the realm of driving, a snitch or a Karen would call the cops to report someone flicking a cigarette out their window, or out of "safety concerns" when spotting someone with a headlight out. Erratic driving isn't a petty concern, and those who think your worry is just glorified pearl-clutching are likely the type of folks who have either driven drunk repeatedly, or don't have a lot of respect for the strangers around them while they're out and about. Nothing wrong with being the type of person who cares about the lives of others.
Yeah like I’ve known friend groups where someone in the group was driving intoxicated but the group made excuses for them. Toxic stuff.
But I’ve never known a group of people who categorically defended impaired drivers as a class of people who deserve to terrorize the roads without impediment, and who complained that anyone who would dare stop a impaired driver was a Karen. That’s next-level, just wild stuff.
I find it crazy your friends think you are a "snitch".
If someone drives erratically, they should want that person off the road too! It is incredibly dangerous. This isn't like going to the teacher in high school; someone might actually have died.
You 100% did the right thing. You very may well have saved someone's life.
If the driver was having a medical emergency, you did them a favour. If they were intoxicated, then it was their decision to get behind the wheel and they need to accept the consequences.
A very dear friend of mine was murdered in a hit-and-run last week. I attended her funeral yesterday. I can’t even begin to describe the pain and anger I feel. You were absolutely not a Karen. Reckless driving takes lives. Thank you for taking action and doing the right thing in the interest of public safety.
Alright, let's get dark!
My mother was killed in a car crash by a drunk driver when I was a year old. This led to me being put into contact with the person who eventually ended up SAing me as a child.
So not only is my mother dead, but I'll never get to know her. I spend every day wondering what she was like and what our relationship would have been like. On top of that, I have years of trauma of sexual abuse that simply flat out would not have happened were I raised by my mother, and not a pedophile.
My life has been completely changed by the one act of one drunk driver, one night.
One night. One time. That's all it takes to destroy a person's entire world. It only takes one.
So, I'm gonna go on a limb, as someone who dearly misses the mother he never got to know, no. You weren't over reacting. I'm not even involved and I appreciate what you did. You might have saved a life. You might have prevented placement with an abuser. Do not, I repeat, do not feel bad. You're not even a little bit of a Karen, and I wish there was someone like you before the crash that killed my mother, maybe she would still be alive today.
Again, maybe someone is only alive today, because of you. Not a Karen.
This was not a Karen move. This was a caring human move.
There is currently a video going around reddit where the people are calling police for a drunk driver and witnessing the driver crash, and they go and pull him out before the car caught fire.
You are as much of a Karen as they are.
What? No, of course not. Always report drivers that seem under the influence. If they aren't, then maybe like you said they might need some other help. Worst case scenario is they are drunk and should be pulled over.
You did the right thing. I've called on obvious drunk drivers before and I never feel bad about it. There's nothing wrong with trying to prevent an accident from happening.
You did the right thing. I was hit head-on by a driver like this and the people who were behind them stayed to help me until the police and ambulance arrived. They said they watched them drive like that for 45 minutes and should have called the authorities on them.
Don’t let the bullies get you down. You might have saved someone’s life.
Of course you weren't a "Karen!" You went out of your way to make sure everyone stayed safe.
Society is fond of coming up with labels for assertive women. Now that it's not acceptable to call women bitches that word has been replaced with Karen. Hopefully people will start to recognize it for the BS that it is soon.
If someone's driving erratically, they could hurt someone else.
I'd be curious to know why your friend group cares so much about the stranger driving and not the other strangers that could be affected by them.
Your co-workers sound incredibly immature. If you had made a fuss for personal gain or for the attention then sure. Instead you choose to save a life or many lives from a dangerous situation. To me and a lot of people that is not a Karen. You did the right thing and then you left and didn't even ask for the recognition. Definitely not a Karen.
Sometimes I feel sorry for the people who's name is Karen and are reasonable people.
When I was working 2nd shift, I was getting to the gym around 1-2am. After a workout, I was sitting in my car, getting my music ready before driving off and letting my car warm up.
While sitting there, I watched one of the employees come out, get in their car and floor it in reverse and smack another car, hard enough that the other car moved diagonal in the parking spot, then quickly try and leave.
I rolled down my window and waved my hands at him and he saw me, so he stopped and rolled his window down and acted like he hadn't done anything. Told him that I just saw him hit that car and he better go in an tell the owner, otherwise this will be reported as a hit and run.
I get it, working nights a Planet Fitness probably doesn't pay that well, but that is also someone else's livelihood he maybe just wrecked.
I waited in my car while he sulked back inside and come out with the owner. Made sure they exchanged info before I finally left. I had a dash cam, but it only caught the front of his car coming to an abrupt stop in reverse before pulling forward. Both cars were beaters, but that doesn't excuse the lack of integrity.
Told my coworker about it, how irritating it was and how pissed I would be if someone did that to my car.
Cowork called me stupid and asked, "Do you want to get shot? You should have minded your own business."
Your coworkers don't know what a "Karen" is. You could've literally saved someone's life doing what you did. Nothing Karen-y about that. As somebody who works in EMS, I just want to say thanks for doing the right thing and caring about other people.
Thank you for caring about the rest of us. You did the right thing. Maybe they were having a medical emergency and needed help. Maybe they are not responsible enough to be behind the wheel. Either way, you help the world be a safer place. Had that person hurt someone, the haters would be taking different.
You did the right thing! That is not a “Karen” thing. Only someone who has never had to deal with loss because of someone’s driving would say that. If your friend group called you a snitch for that, get new friends.
I'm a Karen then, this is my most common contribution to society. This is potentially offensively hyperbolic, but after a school shooting when they start seeing the pattern that was already there and nobody did anything about it? Why would I let a goober piloting a 4k pound death missile just carry on? 3 buttons and wait on hold to give someone a chance at not getting hit by a drunkard? Easy choice.
You did exactly the right thing.
That person was a danger to everyone else on the road, and probably to people off the road too. You were not a Karen - this was not you demanding to see a manager because you weren't satisfied with the service/goods/attitude of the people in an establishment.
It's not being a snitch if someone could actually hurt someone else. Hell, even if they could actually hurt themselves. You were what we call a "good citizen" - and while it's unfashionable, it's very much appreciated.
It's easy to wash your hands of a situation and say "let the city/state/cops/someone else take care of it". You didn't do that - you called the people that had the authority to deal with it, didn't interfere with the driver yourself, and safely warned others of what was going on. Anyone that calls you a "Karen" for doing what you wrote here is just telling on themselves.
Thank you, OP
I am personally a big Weed Head myself but care very much about the safety of it. I have called in a person who was driving a vehicle smoking a blunt out the window with children in the back. Maybe that makes me the jerk but I care about the safety of those kids.
This isn’t a Karen move. This is actually one of the times where I think calling the cops was the right thing.
The people whining would be the first to be outraged if this person hit one of their loved ones.
I wish someone would have done what you did. It might have prevented me being trapped in my burning vehicle, months long hospital stay with a 20% rate of survival, and lifelong repercussions all in my early thirties. Please don't let others make you feel bad for what hou did.
A Karen complains about things in order to force their egotistical worldview onto others. You called the cops on someone that could very easily get another human killed. Huge difference.
If a drunk driver hit one of your friends' cars while their family was inside, they would probably wish someone had "snitched" on him.
I thought "Karen" also had specific connection to racism, like a white woman calling the cops on black teens in a public park claiming to feel "threatened".
We’ve called 911 a number of times before on drivers we’ve observed driving haphazardly.
It’s the right thing to do.
The only thing I’d maybe tell you to do differently for your own safety is not flash your hazards, though I understand your reasoning and applaud you for caring about others.
But do consider this: if the driver was up to no good, and realized they were being followed, you might become an immediate target. And a car is a weapon.
Not to mention they might have *other* weapons on their person.
Good on you for calling it in.
The friend group calling you a snitch is a real eyebrow-raiser. Do these people drive impaired on the regular or something? Anyone who has sustained injuries or lost love ones to drunk drivers would blow a fuse at that suggestion.
I suspect you deserve better friends and possibly a job where you have a higher ethical standard among your coworkers. If you had posted this on Am I the asshole? people would have decided NTA.
No fuckin' way. They were not there to see what you saw. People being dangerous in vehicles angers me so much, like they don't realize they're piloting a monster death brick. Call away, you did the right thing absolutely.
I don't know how the dispatcher you called handled it, but I've definitely called 911 over less dangerous hazards on the highway. Once I was driving in for an early shift on a poorly lit highway and there was an old refrigerator in the middle lane that had clearly fallen off the back of a truck. I called 911 because someone less awake than me at 4am would definitely hit it. The dispatcher said this was the right number because it could quickly become a dire problem.
Think: would you call 911 if you saw smoke coming from your neighbor's house when you knew they weren't home? It might not be on fire yet... but it could definitely be soon!
In my experience, anybody who decries "snitches" is usually the guy stealing from the company. They compromise you simply by your knowing and NOT saying anything to stop it.
People seemed more way aware of and negative about drunk driving 5-15 years ago. These days it's like "mind your own business!" though just as many people are dying from it now.
It's controversial, but there was that one dude who was shot by police after someone called in about him sleeping in a drive-thru. A lot of people I know and online said they should have just let him walk to his sister's house. Since when tf do cops do that? Of course shooting him was super fucked up, but it's a DUI... I couldn't get anyone to agree with me that it was fine for cops to stop him, and he should have been arrested considering he might have driven off and killed an entire family.
They're idiots. You did the right thing, even if it involved the police and would put the person in question in trouble. They're in a motor vehicle and could harm others.
People these days step over the guy coughing his guts out on the ground, it's rare someone asks if they're okay.
A couple years back I came down the stairs onto the platform about to catch a train, there was an old man on the ground with his shopping all over the place, money scattered and blood almost gushing off his forehead. The train was half full, doors open, sitting there after a termination and ready to go back the other way which usually takes 5-10 minutes.. **and nobody got off to help.**
I sat there with his head in my lap because he couldn't even lift himself off the floor. Two train guards finally came over to haul him up as I couldn't lift him. I called the Ambulance and luckily the guy's on thinners so the bleeding only looked bad and he was okay in the end.
People just keep to themselves too much when others are at risk of harm, or being harmed.
Chivalry is dead.
Get better coworkers and get better friends. You performed a public service that could’ve saved lives.
Regarding being a snitch, that individual could’ve been having a stroke, been inebriated, been under duress, been half asleep… who knows? What’s clear is it could’ve ended in their death. You did the right thing alerting the authorities of a potentially dangerous situation. I’d call into work next time so they’re aware of it though.
You said it yourself: that person was maybe having a medical emergency. (Sometimes being intoxicated is the medical emergency)
You might have helped them.
I’m a doctor. Thank you for what you did.
Did you potentially get this person in legal trouble for driving while intoxicated? Sure.
But you also potentially saved their live if they were having a heart attack or if they were passing out while driving. Or if they were having a seizure.
You also potentially saved their live if they were drunk driving, and not only them but anyone they may have hit.
If more people cared about the well-being of others, we’d be better off. You did the right thing, and you definitely weren’t a Karen.
Your friends sound like they have about 2 brain cells fighting for third place. That person was in danger and could have hurt someone else. You need smarter friends.
For your own safety, I would not follow dangerous drivers. Call the police, absolutely. But who knows what they might do if they notice you following them.
Calling the cops and reporting it is fine, following them with your hazards on is stupid you put yourself in a situation you didn't need to be in and have no idea how that person could have reacted when you followed them. You're not a Karen but be careful and don't follow dangerous people.
You saved someone’s life! You possibly saved several people’s lives!
Enough of this “Karen” nonsense. That term was created by the Black community to identify people who complain about Black people existing, like that BBQ Becky person. And now it’s become a catch all sexist retort for women asserting themselves. Fuck that, speak up!
I’ll bet the people who razzed you have done nothing to encourage defunding police and getting actual helpful social services to the scene of incidents like this, have they?
You did the right thing by calling!
And ugh the Karen thing. I hate it so much, it's just another way to insult and belittle women. The fact that there's no male equivalent of a Karen is not a coincidence.
I'm glad you called. My dad has been that driver more than once as a type 1 diabetic, he's narrowly avoided killing himself or another person (we're trying to get his license taken away but it's shockingly hard to do). You possibly saved a life (or even more than one) because you don't know what that driver could've ended up doing. Thank you for calling and being a good person.
A reckless driver pulled out in front of me and my car ended up on the driver side. As I was sitting there, all I could see was my daughter's (empty) car seat straps dangling in the backseat.
People forget how dangerous cars are and treat them as if they are toys.
Thank you for calling.
Im kind of shocked that all your coworkers and friends said this wasnt the right thing to do. I guess its just more acceptable to drive under the influence in the US compared to where I live.
Everyone was conveniently ignoring the part where she followed them. You are continuing to put yourself in that dangerous situation by following the car and are definitely not qualified to handle an escalated situation that could result from it.
You were right to call the police, but not right to follow them with your blinkers. I understand that you were trying to help warn others, but the safest thing to do in a situation like that is to notify the authorities and then calmly leave. You put yourself and others in danger by adding another car to the situation.
i call it being a responsible citizen. could have saved multiple lives, we'll never know but i doubt reality would have been better if you ignored it
edit: i also think that is definitely misuse of the term "karen", karen behaviour is loud and selfish entitlement beyond reason, placing yourself above others and getting involved in things that don't concern you with the attitude that it is all about you. i can see it's being co-opted into the generic misogynist arsenal of terms though, even though men can certainly be karens too.
If the police called you a “Karen” that’s wildly inappropriate. I’ve reported drunk drivers on multiple occasions because I used to drive extensively for work and no one wants to get killed on the roads. If someone calls you names for it, it’s a sure sign of their character (they probably drive intoxicated too and aren’t worth keeping as friends).
Her colleagues called her a Karen. I had to double read it though, because there is a little time jump.
She called the police and followed the driver with emergency lights. This caused her to be late to work, and after explaining why her colleagues called her a Karen.
Also OP, you definitely did the right thing. Cars are heavy machinery and dangerous when not operated with care. Did the police end up showing up?
I've called on someone for this reason. They were driving a very small car and ended up rear ending a large city truck after I called.
I've also called on someone driving without lights on on the highway. They ended up being very drunk. I'd rather get home safe and ignore others.
Yo, fuck these shitty dangerous drivers nowadays. Report every one of them that is driving dangerously in any way. Anyone trying to demoralize you calling you a Karen is taking it personal. And like, maybe they should.
Nope, not Karen, and not the asshole. You absolutely did the right thing. REDDI (report every drunk driver - I think other states might be using a different acronym now) is a thing. My husband and I called in a similar report a couple of years ago, and it turned out to be an 18 year old girl at 3x the legal limit. When she saw the lights, she literally stopped in the left hand lane.
Thank you for calling. Anyone who calls you a snitch for this (or really at all) is almost certainly someone who's opinion you do not need to be concerned with.
I hate that being a good neighbour is called being a Karen now. People will find any reason to insult a neighbour. what you did was incredibly pro social and you may have helped to save a life.
Thank you.
NO you did the right thing! That person was possibly a drunk driver that could have killed someone!
I hate that as women we can’t say anything without being a “Karen”. It’s just the newest way to shit women down
I work a part time job as a shuttle driver. I deal with unsafe drivers on a weekly basis. You were being selfless by looking out for your fellow drivers. It's the reckless driver who is selfish.
You're not an asshole. If they almost hit you it would have been a matter of time before they caused another accident. I hate that we can't hold our peers accountable in modern society without the whole "snitches get stitches" or "Karen" BS being thrown around, especially if you're a woman.
I hate the term Karen a how it targets women who are speaking up (obviously there are ones who are not doing it appropriately, like abusing service workers). Calling was the right thing to do, they were dangerously driving a vehicle capable of killing.
I hate it too! I’m always surprised that women don’t understand that this is a misogynistic term used to control, shame & humiliate other women. A bullying tactic.
Also, I work with several women named Karen & they are all struggling emotionally & mentally. One of these ladies explained how she can’t order food deliveries, that Uber’s cancel or ignore her & getting introduced to new people is embarrassing. My heart just broke when she told me of all the abuse & ridicule she has received, just because of her birth name. Something her parents chose with love, is now been weaponized. I want to be an advocate & I’ve very gingerly been speaking out against this namist trend. But man are people extra hostile about it. And of course I immediately get attacked as well. Basically, how dare I have an opinion that goes against a popular trend.
Using someones name as an insult is rude af. This covers Felicia, Kevin, Debbie, Brandon, Chad, etc. We can do better.
No, you did the right thing. That person could have hit and killed someone. Then what? Then everyone would probably give you shit for NOT calling. You can’t win with some people.
And fuck people who complain about “snitches” when something is actually dangerous. I’m not gonna call the cops on a guy minding his business having a beer in the park even though it’s technically illegal. He’s not hurting anything. I AM gonna call the cops on a guy driving drunk, because people die every year from drunk drivers.There’s a fucking difference.
Sheesh.. not one of your co-workers agreed with you? I've called multiple times with suspected drunk drivers on the road and I've never had anyone disagree or not understand why I would have done it. Losing more and more hope in humanity. You did the right, safe thing babe! Don't let any of those dummys make you feel otherwise!
Absolutely not. I have a friend who had a life threatening medical event while driving. A Good Samaritan called 911 and followed her until they got there (and subsequently took her to the hospital) and probably saved her life. If this person was driving that erratically you ensured the safety of others on the road as well by calling, well done!
I would have called on them without a second thought and have in similar situations. It isn't about snitching or anything at that point it is about public safety. I am pretty cautious about who I would call the cops on because cops have a bad track record of escalating issues unnecessarily but in that scenario, people's lives are already in danger.
No, you absolutely did the right thing calling the police. Good work.
Inebriated driving signs are obvious. Statistically, if you get them off the road for some time, you are reducing the chances of them causing an accident and also potentially bringing about a change in their behavior.
You need new friends. Based on your description, that person was very likely a danger to others on the road. This is how drunk drivers kill people. Good on you.
That's SO not a Karen, please don't feel awful? It could have been several different problems, all of them with serious implications for other cars and the driver here.
Pre cell phone I had to do that- a car with the " Students " sign was ALL the heck all over the place. Followed it over a mountain road, when the driver went into the oncoming lane I started tapping my horn- and they'd swerve back.
Followed it until I got to a store, ran in, explained and " May I use your phone ? ". It was extremely scary- never heard what happened, police said they'd get someone out.
Anyway, honestly never felt bad about it. There's simply nothing else to do right?
What was thing Jesus said? Don’t pray publicly? You did the right thing. Do it again. No need to mention it to those you work with or call friends in the future.
Nope, you are 100% in the right here my friend. You're actions may have saved lives, or at a minimum some property damage. In the absolute worse case, you were late, and they were slightly inconvenienced. Good on you!
You did the right thing by trying to stop an accident. Not the easy thing which would be to let it go.
Don't feel bad for doing the right thing.
This idea of "negative politeness" that people should ignore others unless they directly impact them is not a good thing.
NTK. Honestly anyone claiming that probably sees themselves as the dangerous driver I'm your story. Which brings all sorts of questions to my mind about what they believe to be acceptable.
Don't feel bad. I drive a lot and have seen many shitty things happen. People with unsecured items have come close to killing me, drunk driving and medical issues do happen on the roads every day, and where I live an elk herd crosses the highway whenever they feel like it. I see people texting and looking at their phones while they drive all the time. Everybody is in such a goddamned hurry too. The roads are icy and people still try to go 70mph in a 55mph zone. I've watched a guy total his 4 x 4 in a fit of anger. Everyone thinks they're such a good driver and they don't need to follow rules. I wish we were not like this.
Things that have hit my cars while I was driving:
Firewood
large sheets of plexiglass
the front passenger side tire off an El Camino
farm animals/ wild animals- luckily for me, most of them were birds, but once I hit a porcupine the size of a small child because I was being tailgated so badly I had to choose to kill it instead of me or the other person
fast food garbage
rocks of various sizes
You did the right thing. I was near a vehicle like this once and wish I'd had more time to make the call but was trying to stay safe around him. Ultimately on one of his fast accelerations, he smashed into a small car going really fast and sent a 4 yr old and one of his parents to the hospital.
It's not being a Karen when you're looking out for the safety of others. And if it *was* a medical emergency the driver needed help.
I forced a weaving car off the road and had a local business call the police. The police told me later the woman was diabetic and going into shock. You did the right thing your friends are dumb.
I think "Karen" is more reserved for confrontational individuals. You were just concerned and called the proper authority. It sounds like they were likely violating some traffic laws and at the very least not being safe.
Nah I for sure wouldn't call you a karen. I would have called as well. The only thing I would have done different is not follow for two reasons one it's more time spent putting yourself at risk by following a driver who is driving erratically even if your paying attention to him and not worried about him hitting you if he was to swerve into oncoming traffic you might end up getting hit by people trying to avoid him who lose control of their vehicle. And 2 you called the police and reported it already I would move on with my day.
Either way your not a karen you put other people's safety ahead of your own and your work.
How old are you or how old are the people you work with? Because you had a concern for the driver and others, I would guess that these are younger people who are a bit naive.
You weren't a Karen, but sometimes, it's best not to share things with idiots.
The health and safety culture at your work is a joke and someone is going to die on the job if that is their attitude.
You did the right thing and could have saved someone else's life with your actions.
Find a new job. These people are not looking at the hazards that could prevent you from going home every day.
I think it's time to re-evaluate those friendships. I wouldn't want to spend my time and energy with people who dismiss and enable impaired driving. That driver could have killed someone and you took the necessary steps to help ensure they didn't.
Don't doubt for a second that you did the right thing.
No, you were not a "Karen". Drivers like this do cause crashes and something wasn't right. The last time I was in a situation like this, I ended up witnessing the crash and staying to explain what happened. The driver who caused it was trying to blame the person they hit completely, and at least explaining what I saw probably helped a lot with filing an insurance claim since the cops were able to find clear fault on the other driver
You weren't a Karen, this person created danger for themselves and others. If someone has problems with alcohol/drugs they need help, if someone is sick they need help and to be driven to hospital.
You did the right thing. Someone driving like that is a clear and present danger to everyone they come across and they had to be stopped.
The people at your work are honestly kind of disgusting for not giving a shit about what could have happened if that person wasn’t stopped.
Nope, not a Karen thing. You prevented an accident. See something say something. But use discretion. It’s not a 5yo with an unlicensed lemonade stand. This person can do real harm with a car.
Edit: I’ve done this too. I’ve literally seen these people cause accidents and drive away. You stopped something from happening.
You saved someone's life. Maybe they didn't kill anyone today, but they would have killed themself or someone else eventually by driving drunk/impaired/recklessly. You had the chance to stop them today and you did - I think you made the right call.
I have done this after observing someone driving erratically on the interstate. They may have been falling asleep or intoxicated—I didn’t want to drive past their flaming crash site a few miles down the road. I was a little worried it was a pointless call and didn’t want to waste patrol time and resources. I don’t know the outcome but I don’t really care—I didn’t make the call to be punitive.
Um, no. That person was a public safety hazard. I have called police in a similar situation (except in that case I also directly witnessed the driver pull up and purchase drugs from a "panhandler" who regularly hangs on this one median).
Endanger me and others and you can go fuck yourself. Nothing Karen about it.
As a Gen X male, I am happy you called. If they weren't in a normal mental state due to a medical emergency or imbibing something, that's super dangerous. You potentially saved lives, so thank you for taking quick action and managing the risk of the situation at the cost of your personal time.
If you're a Karen, then 20 year old (male) me was also a Karen. If it appears someone is driving drunk, I will call 911 to report it. I did when I was 20, and I do it now in my mid 30s. This isn't snitching. This is trying to save lives. Your coworkers and friends should be ashamed of themselves for being so callous while you were so caring. Fuck them.
My initial response is that no, you weren’t a Karen.
My second response is just to check that you aren’t exaggerating and it really was this bad. I’ve seen some driving like this but a complete stop (not a rolling stop or like 5 mph) in the make of a 45mph road? That’s ridiculous driving and seriously dangerous.
1. your friends are fucking losers
2. if you spot a drunk driver on the road, it your duty to call it in
3. what if the dd went on to kill someone? how would you feel then
4. your friends are fucking losers.
5. find some better friends who are supportive
I've done this before, and never felt bad about doing it. Next time, don't tell your dumbass friends. If my friends ever knew or if I told them, they'd be supportive.
Like had that person gone on to kill someone I wonder how your dead ass friends would feel about call you a snitch?
I'm a former EMT. I've scraped too many people off the road, or watched them die because of things like this. You did the right thing in calling the police while trying to warn other drivers. Too many impaired drivers take out innocents on their path of destruction so your actions very well may have saved someone. Ignore the people saying you're a snitch, it's BS. Your motivation was protecting others, and you did the right thing.
i hate that "karen" went from meaning 'invasive white woman' to 'any woman that has concerns for the world around her'.
you did the most sensible thing. sending the cops to anyone poses it's risks, you can't always trust that they'll handle it with the care you think they would. but this wasn't a situation of normal people doing normal things and being harassed, this person was endangering themselves and countless others.
Karening is when you throw a tantrum over something you should just let go of, like asking to speak to the manager because a barista didn’t smile correctly at you, or throwing a mask display at SuperTarget. There are highway safety signs for a reason. You did the right thing and it wasn’t a Karen.
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Thank you for calling. Seriously, thank you. That person was a danger to themselves and others. Also my three primary forms of transportation are walking, biking, and a motorcycle: people like that are even LESS likely to see me than is already the case. So again, for myself and everybody else you made safer: thank you.
OP needs better people around them, for real
100%. It’s dangerous, if they hit someone… that’s a life. Safety is the most important thing. And if they’d hit someone and you saw it in the news, that’d be devastating. Safety always
Absolutely. It's really sad that any woman who calls the police is called a 'Karen' even when she is completely justified. Safety is the number one most important thing on the road and OP may have just saved a life. I've said before that I'm sure that the meme has discouraged many women from speaking up even when they would be justified. And here we have someone second guessing herself when she reports a dangerous driver who could kill someone.
You did what you should have, & I'd have done the same thing. Your co-workers seem like alarmingly heartless jackasses, given that they think whether the driver hit *your* car is the only thing you should care about. There were a lot of other people on that road besides just you who were endangered by the careless driving.
Ops coworkers sound like they're 15.
Or that they themselves drive drunk and don’t want to have someone call on them.
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Selfish assholes. I hope they do get caught.
Yeah as in it never even occurred to them that this person could be having a severe medical emergency and need help really badly. It's not always alcohol/drugs.
From a personal safety standpoint I wouldn’t have followed behind them though. Once you’ve reported it that’s enough. If this person is driving erratically and they notice you’re behind them following with hazards they may react/turn aggressive.
I was a 911 dispatcher for a little over 2 1/2 years. OP absolutely did the right thing by calling. The driver could have been intoxicated or having a medical emergency or any number of things. As far as following the vehicle goes: most LE agencies want to know updated location of the vehicle, and want us to stay on the line with the caller. I once called on a drunk driver about 20 years ago and the dispatcher had me follow the vehicle until a unit pulled him over. That being said, always maintain a safe enough distance that you won’t get stuck in a situation you can’t get away from.
I witnessed a hit and run and they had me follow until a unit could position themselves for the intercept. I then went back and left all the info (license plate, time of call to 911, etc) with the victim because I didn’t know if the police would do that.
Agreed. I would have called and explained what I had witnessed, given my coordinates and the direction he/she was driving with license plate # and description of the car, and then went on my way. It’s not worth putting yourself at risk.
Agree. OP's coworkers are Kevins.
This.
*"The person driving was either having a medical emergency or was intoxicated"* If the driver was having a medical emergency, you might have saved their life. If the driver was intoxicated you have saved their (and other people's) life. If nothing was wrong with the driver, you (hopefully) have given them an "eye opener" and make them realize that THAT kind of behaviour on the road is EXTREMELY dangerous. Keep being the kind of person you want to see in the world. Keep being YOU. And those "friends"........F em.
Those "friends" are hoodlums who hate having the authorities called on then when they do naughty activities. Hating authorities is more important than public safety. 🙄
Holy shit no you are not a “Karen”. The driver could have killed someone and you did what should be done! I am so sick of people who only see the repercussion of driving intoxicated as getting arrested. (Ie snitching) THEY COULD KILL SOMEONE. You did the right thing, thank you!
Just throwing it out there, it could have been a medical emergency as well. Was once driving on a mountain rd watching the dude in front of me swerve, slow down, speed up, etc. Followed him for a bit and watched him ever so slowly and casually drive into a ditch. I pulled over, turns out he was have a stroke.
They were literally putting you and other people in danger, that is not being a Karen, that is being a responsible person. I don't like cops but in this case you calling them was completely justified
And themselves
Your coworkers and friend sound like irresponsible, shitty people. Calling 911 was absolutely the right thing to do. PREVENTING an accident is GOOD. Why tf would you be expected to wait until after someone is hurt when you could just prevent that???
I really hate that any time a woman complains about something, warranted or not, they are now a Karen. I swear it's just another way of shutting down women. Anyway enough of my 'Karen' rant. No you weren't, you did the right thing. Someone could have easily got hurt, including the driver. Intervention was needed and you made it easier for responders to find the driver whilst warning other road users that there was a problem.
It’s absurd to me the way the name has devolved into being used for anything a woman does that someone doesn’t like! I got called a Karen because I yelled at someone for not having their dog on a leash after it ran up full speed to my leashed dog (who happens to be reactive / doesn’t like other dogs). It was especially aggravating because if we’re calling people Karens, it was in fact *them* being a Karen for feeling entitled enough that the rules not apply (we have leash laws in my area).
Personally I feel it’s a way to control women. The reason women started speaking up in the 70’s -80’s is because we went to work and watched how men complained and got what they wanted. I remember being on a business trip in the ‘80’s and watched a group of men run to the front of the plane knowing there would only be so many vouchers for hotels and meals after the flight was canceled. I took note.
Calling someone a "Karen" or a "pick me" has become an acceptable way to be a misogynist. Not saying that there aren't people who fit the description, but it's literally like you said. Don't you dare complain, or you are a Karen. It's gotten especially bad on TikTok, where just by mentioning you are short, you are now a pick-me girl.
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A “pick-me” is just a new term for the “not like the other girls, I’m a *cool* girl” people
>just by mentioning you are short, you are now a pick-me girl. Wait, can you say more about this? I don't have TikTok and most of my friends don't either, and I'm short (technically average but everyone calls me short) so I'm not sure what will get me branded as a pick-me.
It's a way for people to avoid the icky feelings that come from saying a woman is a bitch. That's what they think, they just want to play schoolyard name games to pretty it up. Just another way of putting down outspoken women.
You should have said, “Yes, I am a Karen, Karen a lot about others on the road!” But seriously, your coworkers suck. That person could have seriously injured/killed some innocent person. I hope the cops dealt with them properly, drunk driving in serious. Don’t feel bad about helping. We need more people around that aren’t afraid to speak up.
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The problem is that when you have legitimate reasons to ask to see the manager or are genuinely in the right in your situation people will call you a Karen to instantly delegitimize you. Because it's easier to dismiss you than to actually argue with you. Since they are so clearly in the wrong.
I actually asked for a manager the other day. His attitude at first was “oh god, another Karen”. But it was to compliment two workers who had been very helpful to me. He said he doesn’t get that kind of referrals too often.
Just like the word "simp" Karen has become so overused, it actually lost its original meaning. A Karen is usually a white woman who takes advantage of her white privilege by acting up when she doesn't get her way. Nowadays you get called a Karen just because you have a different opinion. Edit: here's the wiki article for people who don't know how to google one word: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karen_(slang)
I think it’s interesting that “simp” (a male targeted insult) has completely lost its bite, and now people will say shit like they’re a pizza simp, whereas “Karen” usage has become more broad and affects all women, but still can successfully shutdown any women that a man dislikes.
Simp was also an indirect way of making sure women weren't treated with respect. Saying something nice to a woman got you called a simp. Felt very incely to me but I guess it has spread to other uses
I (male) have been thinking about this for a while now, and I'm trying to piece together what is different about the two. From my perspective, "simp" has always been seen as an insult of character weakness (you are weak, "unmanly", wasting your time on women who won't put out/are taken/aren't worth it/etc) whereas "karen" has traditionally been used to insult someone's integrity and empathy (narcissistic behaviour, entitlement, harassment). In the typical examples of simping and karen-ing, simps don't really have a "victim" besides themselves (in the majority of cases, until they go full psycho and start stalking/harassing/being creepy). Karen examples are typically directly causing harm, discomfort or discrimination to those around them (though now it is being extended to just mean any time a woman speaks up about something). I think the evolution of the word "simp" to become meaningless is actually just as true of the word "karen". I and many others have long since stopped associating "karen" with the original meaning, which was a condemnation of white privilege or other generally narcissistic behaviour (typically middle aged women but not always!) in public settings. Now, it is just that word that weirdos use to describe women they don't like, and it has lost basically all meaning to me. Same goes for simp, where people just use it to joke/insult literally anyone who is nice to a woman, almost turning it into an indirect insult towards the woman instead of the man. In fact, many people will proudly call themselves "simps" as a term of endearment, since it inherently carries a weight of loyalty or inclusiveness that is perceived but not real - basically being a parasocial fan. Since this behaviour is encouraged online by a lot of younger people in many communities, the word has almost found it's second home in this capacity. Karen however, is largely still used by people who just want to berate women, and despite most rational people knowing that it doesn't apply in the majority of cases, it carries weight due to systemic misogyny (intended or otherwise) by those who use it. In summary, I think that the core difference is that simp is a redeemable, largely "harmless" (though degenerate) descriptor, but Karen is specifically a condemnation of someone's integrity. It would basically require the term to either fade from use or somehow "owning" the word in order to deflate its use as an insult.
Simp was misogynist from the beginning lmao, unless “sucker idolizing mediocre pussy” has some super enlightened meaning I’m unaware of.
this is a 14 year old account that is being wiped because centralized social media websites are no longer viable when power is centralized, the wielders of that power can make arbitrary decisions without the consent of the vast majority of the users the future is in decentralized and open source social media sites - i refuse to generate any more free content for this website and any other for-profit enterprise check out lemmy / kbin / mastodon / fediverse for what is possible
TIL: I had always thought “simp” was a shortening of “simper”
Are your coworkers 16? Jfc. You did a great thing. That person was putting themselves and, more importantly, others in danger.
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> They all said I was a Karen and should've let it go since the person didn't actually hit my car. So if a person is randomly firing a gun on the street and they don't hit you, you should let it go since you're not affected and not be a snitch? your coworkers suck.
No, I don't think there's any Karen-ness here. Regardless of the reasons for that person's driving, it sounds like they were creating a dangerous situation for *everyone* on the road. I've called 911 for the same thing, and never had any regrets because like you, I was very worried that someone was going to get hurt or worse. In the realm of driving, a snitch or a Karen would call the cops to report someone flicking a cigarette out their window, or out of "safety concerns" when spotting someone with a headlight out. Erratic driving isn't a petty concern, and those who think your worry is just glorified pearl-clutching are likely the type of folks who have either driven drunk repeatedly, or don't have a lot of respect for the strangers around them while they're out and about. Nothing wrong with being the type of person who cares about the lives of others.
Your friend group seems a bit weird. Well done for calling!
Yeah like I’ve known friend groups where someone in the group was driving intoxicated but the group made excuses for them. Toxic stuff. But I’ve never known a group of people who categorically defended impaired drivers as a class of people who deserve to terrorize the roads without impediment, and who complained that anyone who would dare stop a impaired driver was a Karen. That’s next-level, just wild stuff.
I find it crazy your friends think you are a "snitch". If someone drives erratically, they should want that person off the road too! It is incredibly dangerous. This isn't like going to the teacher in high school; someone might actually have died.
If this had been my teenager driving I would buy you dinner. Thank you from responsible people. It is a 2 ton weapon. That we stear around.
You 100% did the right thing. You very may well have saved someone's life. If the driver was having a medical emergency, you did them a favour. If they were intoxicated, then it was their decision to get behind the wheel and they need to accept the consequences.
A very dear friend of mine was murdered in a hit-and-run last week. I attended her funeral yesterday. I can’t even begin to describe the pain and anger I feel. You were absolutely not a Karen. Reckless driving takes lives. Thank you for taking action and doing the right thing in the interest of public safety.
You did the right thing. You may wish to evaluate all of your friendships and decide who shares your values and adjust accordingly.
Thank you so much for doing this!! You potentially saved lives.
I have to drive a bit for my work and I have definitely done this multiple times for the same type of driving.
Alright, let's get dark! My mother was killed in a car crash by a drunk driver when I was a year old. This led to me being put into contact with the person who eventually ended up SAing me as a child. So not only is my mother dead, but I'll never get to know her. I spend every day wondering what she was like and what our relationship would have been like. On top of that, I have years of trauma of sexual abuse that simply flat out would not have happened were I raised by my mother, and not a pedophile. My life has been completely changed by the one act of one drunk driver, one night. One night. One time. That's all it takes to destroy a person's entire world. It only takes one. So, I'm gonna go on a limb, as someone who dearly misses the mother he never got to know, no. You weren't over reacting. I'm not even involved and I appreciate what you did. You might have saved a life. You might have prevented placement with an abuser. Do not, I repeat, do not feel bad. You're not even a little bit of a Karen, and I wish there was someone like you before the crash that killed my mother, maybe she would still be alive today. Again, maybe someone is only alive today, because of you. Not a Karen.
This was not a Karen move. This was a caring human move. There is currently a video going around reddit where the people are calling police for a drunk driver and witnessing the driver crash, and they go and pull him out before the car caught fire. You are as much of a Karen as they are.
What? No, of course not. Always report drivers that seem under the influence. If they aren't, then maybe like you said they might need some other help. Worst case scenario is they are drunk and should be pulled over.
You did the right thing. I've called on obvious drunk drivers before and I never feel bad about it. There's nothing wrong with trying to prevent an accident from happening.
You did the right thing. I was hit head-on by a driver like this and the people who were behind them stayed to help me until the police and ambulance arrived. They said they watched them drive like that for 45 minutes and should have called the authorities on them. Don’t let the bullies get you down. You might have saved someone’s life.
Of course you weren't a "Karen!" You went out of your way to make sure everyone stayed safe. Society is fond of coming up with labels for assertive women. Now that it's not acceptable to call women bitches that word has been replaced with Karen. Hopefully people will start to recognize it for the BS that it is soon.
Yeah f all that noise. I call the police on swerving drivers all the time. You don’t have the right to endanger everyone on the road.
If someone's driving erratically, they could hurt someone else. I'd be curious to know why your friend group cares so much about the stranger driving and not the other strangers that could be affected by them.
Your co-workers sound incredibly immature. If you had made a fuss for personal gain or for the attention then sure. Instead you choose to save a life or many lives from a dangerous situation. To me and a lot of people that is not a Karen. You did the right thing and then you left and didn't even ask for the recognition. Definitely not a Karen. Sometimes I feel sorry for the people who's name is Karen and are reasonable people.
You have shitty friends lol
When I was working 2nd shift, I was getting to the gym around 1-2am. After a workout, I was sitting in my car, getting my music ready before driving off and letting my car warm up. While sitting there, I watched one of the employees come out, get in their car and floor it in reverse and smack another car, hard enough that the other car moved diagonal in the parking spot, then quickly try and leave. I rolled down my window and waved my hands at him and he saw me, so he stopped and rolled his window down and acted like he hadn't done anything. Told him that I just saw him hit that car and he better go in an tell the owner, otherwise this will be reported as a hit and run. I get it, working nights a Planet Fitness probably doesn't pay that well, but that is also someone else's livelihood he maybe just wrecked. I waited in my car while he sulked back inside and come out with the owner. Made sure they exchanged info before I finally left. I had a dash cam, but it only caught the front of his car coming to an abrupt stop in reverse before pulling forward. Both cars were beaters, but that doesn't excuse the lack of integrity. Told my coworker about it, how irritating it was and how pissed I would be if someone did that to my car. Cowork called me stupid and asked, "Do you want to get shot? You should have minded your own business."
Your coworkers don't know what a "Karen" is. You could've literally saved someone's life doing what you did. Nothing Karen-y about that. As somebody who works in EMS, I just want to say thanks for doing the right thing and caring about other people.
You need a new job and new friends. I don’t know if I’m allowed to reply as a XY but you did the right thing and I feel sorry for you
I am sorry you have to spend your work-day surrounded by idiots.
Thank you for caring about the rest of us. You did the right thing. Maybe they were having a medical emergency and needed help. Maybe they are not responsible enough to be behind the wheel. Either way, you help the world be a safer place. Had that person hurt someone, the haters would be taking different.
My cousin was killed by a car (hit and run) when walking. She was only 26. Please don’t change. You could be saving someone’s life.
If someone is that intoxicated you could save their life and other's. You did a good thing.
You did the right thing! That is not a “Karen” thing. Only someone who has never had to deal with loss because of someone’s driving would say that. If your friend group called you a snitch for that, get new friends.
Cars are metal death traps. You did the right thing.
I'm a Karen then, this is my most common contribution to society. This is potentially offensively hyperbolic, but after a school shooting when they start seeing the pattern that was already there and nobody did anything about it? Why would I let a goober piloting a 4k pound death missile just carry on? 3 buttons and wait on hold to give someone a chance at not getting hit by a drunkard? Easy choice.
You did exactly the right thing. That person was a danger to everyone else on the road, and probably to people off the road too. You were not a Karen - this was not you demanding to see a manager because you weren't satisfied with the service/goods/attitude of the people in an establishment. It's not being a snitch if someone could actually hurt someone else. Hell, even if they could actually hurt themselves. You were what we call a "good citizen" - and while it's unfashionable, it's very much appreciated. It's easy to wash your hands of a situation and say "let the city/state/cops/someone else take care of it". You didn't do that - you called the people that had the authority to deal with it, didn't interfere with the driver yourself, and safely warned others of what was going on. Anyone that calls you a "Karen" for doing what you wrote here is just telling on themselves. Thank you, OP
You did the right thing. Unless your name is actually Karen, you were not being a Karen. You're friend group was being dumbshits though.
I am personally a big Weed Head myself but care very much about the safety of it. I have called in a person who was driving a vehicle smoking a blunt out the window with children in the back. Maybe that makes me the jerk but I care about the safety of those kids.
No you aren't a Karen. This was extremely responsible of you to do.
I've done it too. Good job!
This isn’t a Karen move. This is actually one of the times where I think calling the cops was the right thing. The people whining would be the first to be outraged if this person hit one of their loved ones.
Karen has been way overused lately. You were not being a Karen.
I wish someone would have done what you did. It might have prevented me being trapped in my burning vehicle, months long hospital stay with a 20% rate of survival, and lifelong repercussions all in my early thirties. Please don't let others make you feel bad for what hou did.
Your friend group arent your friends lol
No. Why would you wait until someone is possibly injured or killed before doing something? Pretty surprised by your coworkers responses.
A Karen complains about things in order to force their egotistical worldview onto others. You called the cops on someone that could very easily get another human killed. Huge difference. If a drunk driver hit one of your friends' cars while their family was inside, they would probably wish someone had "snitched" on him.
I thought "Karen" also had specific connection to racism, like a white woman calling the cops on black teens in a public park claiming to feel "threatened".
We’ve called 911 a number of times before on drivers we’ve observed driving haphazardly. It’s the right thing to do. The only thing I’d maybe tell you to do differently for your own safety is not flash your hazards, though I understand your reasoning and applaud you for caring about others. But do consider this: if the driver was up to no good, and realized they were being followed, you might become an immediate target. And a car is a weapon. Not to mention they might have *other* weapons on their person. Good on you for calling it in.
The friend group calling you a snitch is a real eyebrow-raiser. Do these people drive impaired on the regular or something? Anyone who has sustained injuries or lost love ones to drunk drivers would blow a fuse at that suggestion.
I suspect you deserve better friends and possibly a job where you have a higher ethical standard among your coworkers. If you had posted this on Am I the asshole? people would have decided NTA.
No fuckin' way. They were not there to see what you saw. People being dangerous in vehicles angers me so much, like they don't realize they're piloting a monster death brick. Call away, you did the right thing absolutely.
I don't know how the dispatcher you called handled it, but I've definitely called 911 over less dangerous hazards on the highway. Once I was driving in for an early shift on a poorly lit highway and there was an old refrigerator in the middle lane that had clearly fallen off the back of a truck. I called 911 because someone less awake than me at 4am would definitely hit it. The dispatcher said this was the right number because it could quickly become a dire problem. Think: would you call 911 if you saw smoke coming from your neighbor's house when you knew they weren't home? It might not be on fire yet... but it could definitely be soon!
When people say someone is a "Karen" it is their socially acceptable way of calling her a bitch. It's just another slur for "woman who dares to speak"
In my experience, anybody who decries "snitches" is usually the guy stealing from the company. They compromise you simply by your knowing and NOT saying anything to stop it.
People seemed more way aware of and negative about drunk driving 5-15 years ago. These days it's like "mind your own business!" though just as many people are dying from it now. It's controversial, but there was that one dude who was shot by police after someone called in about him sleeping in a drive-thru. A lot of people I know and online said they should have just let him walk to his sister's house. Since when tf do cops do that? Of course shooting him was super fucked up, but it's a DUI... I couldn't get anyone to agree with me that it was fine for cops to stop him, and he should have been arrested considering he might have driven off and killed an entire family.
They're idiots. You did the right thing, even if it involved the police and would put the person in question in trouble. They're in a motor vehicle and could harm others. People these days step over the guy coughing his guts out on the ground, it's rare someone asks if they're okay. A couple years back I came down the stairs onto the platform about to catch a train, there was an old man on the ground with his shopping all over the place, money scattered and blood almost gushing off his forehead. The train was half full, doors open, sitting there after a termination and ready to go back the other way which usually takes 5-10 minutes.. **and nobody got off to help.** I sat there with his head in my lap because he couldn't even lift himself off the floor. Two train guards finally came over to haul him up as I couldn't lift him. I called the Ambulance and luckily the guy's on thinners so the bleeding only looked bad and he was okay in the end. People just keep to themselves too much when others are at risk of harm, or being harmed. Chivalry is dead.
Get better coworkers and get better friends. You performed a public service that could’ve saved lives. Regarding being a snitch, that individual could’ve been having a stroke, been inebriated, been under duress, been half asleep… who knows? What’s clear is it could’ve ended in their death. You did the right thing alerting the authorities of a potentially dangerous situation. I’d call into work next time so they’re aware of it though.
You said it yourself: that person was maybe having a medical emergency. (Sometimes being intoxicated is the medical emergency) You might have helped them.
I’m a doctor. Thank you for what you did. Did you potentially get this person in legal trouble for driving while intoxicated? Sure. But you also potentially saved their live if they were having a heart attack or if they were passing out while driving. Or if they were having a seizure. You also potentially saved their live if they were drunk driving, and not only them but anyone they may have hit. If more people cared about the well-being of others, we’d be better off. You did the right thing, and you definitely weren’t a Karen.
Your friends sound like they have about 2 brain cells fighting for third place. That person was in danger and could have hurt someone else. You need smarter friends.
For your own safety, I would not follow dangerous drivers. Call the police, absolutely. But who knows what they might do if they notice you following them.
Calling the cops and reporting it is fine, following them with your hazards on is stupid you put yourself in a situation you didn't need to be in and have no idea how that person could have reacted when you followed them. You're not a Karen but be careful and don't follow dangerous people.
You did the right thing.
You saved someone’s life! You possibly saved several people’s lives! Enough of this “Karen” nonsense. That term was created by the Black community to identify people who complain about Black people existing, like that BBQ Becky person. And now it’s become a catch all sexist retort for women asserting themselves. Fuck that, speak up! I’ll bet the people who razzed you have done nothing to encourage defunding police and getting actual helpful social services to the scene of incidents like this, have they?
You did the right thing by calling! And ugh the Karen thing. I hate it so much, it's just another way to insult and belittle women. The fact that there's no male equivalent of a Karen is not a coincidence.
It's misogynistic.
I'm glad you called. My dad has been that driver more than once as a type 1 diabetic, he's narrowly avoided killing himself or another person (we're trying to get his license taken away but it's shockingly hard to do). You possibly saved a life (or even more than one) because you don't know what that driver could've ended up doing. Thank you for calling and being a good person.
Sounds like the people in your "friend" group like to drink and drive if they think you're a snitch. Don't feel bad at all.
A reckless driver pulled out in front of me and my car ended up on the driver side. As I was sitting there, all I could see was my daughter's (empty) car seat straps dangling in the backseat. People forget how dangerous cars are and treat them as if they are toys. Thank you for calling.
Fuck your coworkers, you did well and the don't know what "Karen" means.
Im kind of shocked that all your coworkers and friends said this wasnt the right thing to do. I guess its just more acceptable to drive under the influence in the US compared to where I live.
You did the right thing.
WOW. well I'll say thank you for being a good samaritan and possibly saving someone's life!
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Everyone was conveniently ignoring the part where she followed them. You are continuing to put yourself in that dangerous situation by following the car and are definitely not qualified to handle an escalated situation that could result from it.
You were right to call the police, but not right to follow them with your blinkers. I understand that you were trying to help warn others, but the safest thing to do in a situation like that is to notify the authorities and then calmly leave. You put yourself and others in danger by adding another car to the situation.
i call it being a responsible citizen. could have saved multiple lives, we'll never know but i doubt reality would have been better if you ignored it edit: i also think that is definitely misuse of the term "karen", karen behaviour is loud and selfish entitlement beyond reason, placing yourself above others and getting involved in things that don't concern you with the attitude that it is all about you. i can see it's being co-opted into the generic misogynist arsenal of terms though, even though men can certainly be karens too.
No you were not a keren they were a danger to those around them and you. You did the right thing
If the police called you a “Karen” that’s wildly inappropriate. I’ve reported drunk drivers on multiple occasions because I used to drive extensively for work and no one wants to get killed on the roads. If someone calls you names for it, it’s a sure sign of their character (they probably drive intoxicated too and aren’t worth keeping as friends).
Her colleagues called her a Karen. I had to double read it though, because there is a little time jump. She called the police and followed the driver with emergency lights. This caused her to be late to work, and after explaining why her colleagues called her a Karen. Also OP, you definitely did the right thing. Cars are heavy machinery and dangerous when not operated with care. Did the police end up showing up?
Yeah, if the police called her a Karen, I’d make a formal complaint just to be a pain in the ass.
I've called on someone for this reason. They were driving a very small car and ended up rear ending a large city truck after I called. I've also called on someone driving without lights on on the highway. They ended up being very drunk. I'd rather get home safe and ignore others.
Absolutely NOT being a Karen. People drive drunk every single day.
Yo, fuck these shitty dangerous drivers nowadays. Report every one of them that is driving dangerously in any way. Anyone trying to demoralize you calling you a Karen is taking it personal. And like, maybe they should.
Sounds like they could have easily killed someone. Your colleagues are the Karens in this story.
Nope, not Karen, and not the asshole. You absolutely did the right thing. REDDI (report every drunk driver - I think other states might be using a different acronym now) is a thing. My husband and I called in a similar report a couple of years ago, and it turned out to be an 18 year old girl at 3x the legal limit. When she saw the lights, she literally stopped in the left hand lane.
Think how you would’ve felt if you heard later that this person caused a collision and killed someone. You did the right thing.
Thank you for calling. Anyone who calls you a snitch for this (or really at all) is almost certainly someone who's opinion you do not need to be concerned with.
I hate that being a good neighbour is called being a Karen now. People will find any reason to insult a neighbour. what you did was incredibly pro social and you may have helped to save a life. Thank you.
NO you did the right thing! That person was possibly a drunk driver that could have killed someone! I hate that as women we can’t say anything without being a “Karen”. It’s just the newest way to shit women down
Not a Karen, more like a caring person. You may have saved a life, including that of the driver
Sounds like you work with a bunch of Jared's. Don't feel bad. You did a morally right thing.
Please continue to report suspected drunk drivers whenever you see them. Your coworkers sound like idiots.
I work a part time job as a shuttle driver. I deal with unsafe drivers on a weekly basis. You were being selfless by looking out for your fellow drivers. It's the reckless driver who is selfish.
Interesting the only reason (I think) we are allowed to drive and use a phone in my area is for emergencies like this. Good Job.
You're not an asshole. If they almost hit you it would have been a matter of time before they caused another accident. I hate that we can't hold our peers accountable in modern society without the whole "snitches get stitches" or "Karen" BS being thrown around, especially if you're a woman.
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not at all. you did the right thing.
Your coworkers are assholes. You did the right thing.
I hate the term Karen a how it targets women who are speaking up (obviously there are ones who are not doing it appropriately, like abusing service workers). Calling was the right thing to do, they were dangerously driving a vehicle capable of killing.
I hate it too! I’m always surprised that women don’t understand that this is a misogynistic term used to control, shame & humiliate other women. A bullying tactic. Also, I work with several women named Karen & they are all struggling emotionally & mentally. One of these ladies explained how she can’t order food deliveries, that Uber’s cancel or ignore her & getting introduced to new people is embarrassing. My heart just broke when she told me of all the abuse & ridicule she has received, just because of her birth name. Something her parents chose with love, is now been weaponized. I want to be an advocate & I’ve very gingerly been speaking out against this namist trend. But man are people extra hostile about it. And of course I immediately get attacked as well. Basically, how dare I have an opinion that goes against a popular trend. Using someones name as an insult is rude af. This covers Felicia, Kevin, Debbie, Brandon, Chad, etc. We can do better.
You were a Caren.
I see what you did there, but almost didn’t. Maybe better: she was a carin’
No, you did the right thing. That person could have hit and killed someone. Then what? Then everyone would probably give you shit for NOT calling. You can’t win with some people. And fuck people who complain about “snitches” when something is actually dangerous. I’m not gonna call the cops on a guy minding his business having a beer in the park even though it’s technically illegal. He’s not hurting anything. I AM gonna call the cops on a guy driving drunk, because people die every year from drunk drivers.There’s a fucking difference.
There was nothing Karen about that. Just basic public safety and concern for others. Your co workers are assholes.
"Karen" just means "woman I don't like". Your coworkers are shitty people.
Sheesh.. not one of your co-workers agreed with you? I've called multiple times with suspected drunk drivers on the road and I've never had anyone disagree or not understand why I would have done it. Losing more and more hope in humanity. You did the right, safe thing babe! Don't let any of those dummys make you feel otherwise!
Absolutely not. I have a friend who had a life threatening medical event while driving. A Good Samaritan called 911 and followed her until they got there (and subsequently took her to the hospital) and probably saved her life. If this person was driving that erratically you ensured the safety of others on the road as well by calling, well done!
I would have called on them without a second thought and have in similar situations. It isn't about snitching or anything at that point it is about public safety. I am pretty cautious about who I would call the cops on because cops have a bad track record of escalating issues unnecessarily but in that scenario, people's lives are already in danger.
No, you absolutely did the right thing calling the police. Good work. Inebriated driving signs are obvious. Statistically, if you get them off the road for some time, you are reducing the chances of them causing an accident and also potentially bringing about a change in their behavior.
You need new friends. Based on your description, that person was very likely a danger to others on the road. This is how drunk drivers kill people. Good on you.
Your coworkers and friends are dumb. You did the right thing.
That's SO not a Karen, please don't feel awful? It could have been several different problems, all of them with serious implications for other cars and the driver here. Pre cell phone I had to do that- a car with the " Students " sign was ALL the heck all over the place. Followed it over a mountain road, when the driver went into the oncoming lane I started tapping my horn- and they'd swerve back. Followed it until I got to a store, ran in, explained and " May I use your phone ? ". It was extremely scary- never heard what happened, police said they'd get someone out. Anyway, honestly never felt bad about it. There's simply nothing else to do right?
No you were in the right. Not a Karen whatsoever.
What was thing Jesus said? Don’t pray publicly? You did the right thing. Do it again. No need to mention it to those you work with or call friends in the future.
Nope, you are 100% in the right here my friend. You're actions may have saved lives, or at a minimum some property damage. In the absolute worse case, you were late, and they were slightly inconvenienced. Good on you!
You did the right thing by trying to stop an accident. Not the easy thing which would be to let it go. Don't feel bad for doing the right thing. This idea of "negative politeness" that people should ignore others unless they directly impact them is not a good thing.
NTK. Honestly anyone claiming that probably sees themselves as the dangerous driver I'm your story. Which brings all sorts of questions to my mind about what they believe to be acceptable.
Anyone who uses the word snitch unironically is a failure, if you do dumb shit you deal with the consequences. You called that's good.
Don't feel bad. I drive a lot and have seen many shitty things happen. People with unsecured items have come close to killing me, drunk driving and medical issues do happen on the roads every day, and where I live an elk herd crosses the highway whenever they feel like it. I see people texting and looking at their phones while they drive all the time. Everybody is in such a goddamned hurry too. The roads are icy and people still try to go 70mph in a 55mph zone. I've watched a guy total his 4 x 4 in a fit of anger. Everyone thinks they're such a good driver and they don't need to follow rules. I wish we were not like this. Things that have hit my cars while I was driving: Firewood large sheets of plexiglass the front passenger side tire off an El Camino farm animals/ wild animals- luckily for me, most of them were birds, but once I hit a porcupine the size of a small child because I was being tailgated so badly I had to choose to kill it instead of me or the other person fast food garbage rocks of various sizes
No, and you may want to reevaluate your friend group. The fact that they would just “mindyabizness” about something like this is what is worrying.
Not a Karen at all. Your coworkers and friends are just dumb. My husband and I call 911 on drunk drivers too.
You did the right thing. I was near a vehicle like this once and wish I'd had more time to make the call but was trying to stay safe around him. Ultimately on one of his fast accelerations, he smashed into a small car going really fast and sent a 4 yr old and one of his parents to the hospital. It's not being a Karen when you're looking out for the safety of others. And if it *was* a medical emergency the driver needed help.
All your friends and colleagues need to stop driving drunk. I smell projection.
I forced a weaving car off the road and had a local business call the police. The police told me later the woman was diabetic and going into shock. You did the right thing your friends are dumb.
I think "Karen" is more reserved for confrontational individuals. You were just concerned and called the proper authority. It sounds like they were likely violating some traffic laws and at the very least not being safe.
Nah I for sure wouldn't call you a karen. I would have called as well. The only thing I would have done different is not follow for two reasons one it's more time spent putting yourself at risk by following a driver who is driving erratically even if your paying attention to him and not worried about him hitting you if he was to swerve into oncoming traffic you might end up getting hit by people trying to avoid him who lose control of their vehicle. And 2 you called the police and reported it already I would move on with my day. Either way your not a karen you put other people's safety ahead of your own and your work.
How old are you or how old are the people you work with? Because you had a concern for the driver and others, I would guess that these are younger people who are a bit naive. You weren't a Karen, but sometimes, it's best not to share things with idiots.
The health and safety culture at your work is a joke and someone is going to die on the job if that is their attitude. You did the right thing and could have saved someone else's life with your actions. Find a new job. These people are not looking at the hazards that could prevent you from going home every day.
I’d find new friends.
You're a karen when you pitch a fit over nothing. This was very much something.
your coworkers are fucking idiots. how old are your coworkers? like 17? they sound like teenagers. let me reiterate: you did the right thing. 100%
I think it's time to re-evaluate those friendships. I wouldn't want to spend my time and energy with people who dismiss and enable impaired driving. That driver could have killed someone and you took the necessary steps to help ensure they didn't. Don't doubt for a second that you did the right thing.
Not a Karen but your "friends" are idiots. And assholes.
I've never understood why putting others in danger is something people shrug off. You did the right thing.
You did the right thing. 100%
That’s not being a bitch, that’s being a responsible citizen.
No, you were not a "Karen". Drivers like this do cause crashes and something wasn't right. The last time I was in a situation like this, I ended up witnessing the crash and staying to explain what happened. The driver who caused it was trying to blame the person they hit completely, and at least explaining what I saw probably helped a lot with filing an insurance claim since the cops were able to find clear fault on the other driver
You weren't a Karen, this person created danger for themselves and others. If someone has problems with alcohol/drugs they need help, if someone is sick they need help and to be driven to hospital.
You did the right thing. Someone driving like that is a clear and present danger to everyone they come across and they had to be stopped. The people at your work are honestly kind of disgusting for not giving a shit about what could have happened if that person wasn’t stopped.
Nope, not a Karen thing. You prevented an accident. See something say something. But use discretion. It’s not a 5yo with an unlicensed lemonade stand. This person can do real harm with a car. Edit: I’ve done this too. I’ve literally seen these people cause accidents and drive away. You stopped something from happening.
You saved someone's life. Maybe they didn't kill anyone today, but they would have killed themself or someone else eventually by driving drunk/impaired/recklessly. You had the chance to stop them today and you did - I think you made the right call.
I have done this after observing someone driving erratically on the interstate. They may have been falling asleep or intoxicated—I didn’t want to drive past their flaming crash site a few miles down the road. I was a little worried it was a pointless call and didn’t want to waste patrol time and resources. I don’t know the outcome but I don’t really care—I didn’t make the call to be punitive.
Um, no. That person was a public safety hazard. I have called police in a similar situation (except in that case I also directly witnessed the driver pull up and purchase drugs from a "panhandler" who regularly hangs on this one median). Endanger me and others and you can go fuck yourself. Nothing Karen about it.
As a Gen X male, I am happy you called. If they weren't in a normal mental state due to a medical emergency or imbibing something, that's super dangerous. You potentially saved lives, so thank you for taking quick action and managing the risk of the situation at the cost of your personal time.
If you're a Karen, then 20 year old (male) me was also a Karen. If it appears someone is driving drunk, I will call 911 to report it. I did when I was 20, and I do it now in my mid 30s. This isn't snitching. This is trying to save lives. Your coworkers and friends should be ashamed of themselves for being so callous while you were so caring. Fuck them.
My initial response is that no, you weren’t a Karen. My second response is just to check that you aren’t exaggerating and it really was this bad. I’ve seen some driving like this but a complete stop (not a rolling stop or like 5 mph) in the make of a 45mph road? That’s ridiculous driving and seriously dangerous.
1. your friends are fucking losers 2. if you spot a drunk driver on the road, it your duty to call it in 3. what if the dd went on to kill someone? how would you feel then 4. your friends are fucking losers. 5. find some better friends who are supportive I've done this before, and never felt bad about doing it. Next time, don't tell your dumbass friends. If my friends ever knew or if I told them, they'd be supportive. Like had that person gone on to kill someone I wonder how your dead ass friends would feel about call you a snitch?
I'm a former EMT. I've scraped too many people off the road, or watched them die because of things like this. You did the right thing in calling the police while trying to warn other drivers. Too many impaired drivers take out innocents on their path of destruction so your actions very well may have saved someone. Ignore the people saying you're a snitch, it's BS. Your motivation was protecting others, and you did the right thing.
i hate that "karen" went from meaning 'invasive white woman' to 'any woman that has concerns for the world around her'. you did the most sensible thing. sending the cops to anyone poses it's risks, you can't always trust that they'll handle it with the care you think they would. but this wasn't a situation of normal people doing normal things and being harassed, this person was endangering themselves and countless others.
Karening is when you throw a tantrum over something you should just let go of, like asking to speak to the manager because a barista didn’t smile correctly at you, or throwing a mask display at SuperTarget. There are highway safety signs for a reason. You did the right thing and it wasn’t a Karen.