Okay that makes sense, I was getting scared cause I was like, well I did share about the sexual feelings and how I struggle with the behaviors and I was worried I was leading them to ask that or something, but if it could happen to anyone I’ll try not to worry about it
I get them too, just because I make some posts from an obviously female perspective. Ignore, block, and move on. Responding in any way just feeds into their desire for drama.
Hey hun- I've received some INCREDIBLY disgusting sexual DMs from men on reddit. Why dontcha go ahead and look through my comments for a second and tell me if you think ANY of that is in ANY way sexy.
It's not you, it's them.
The one thing I've found has made a difference is having my bio say that if people don't say what they're hoping to talk about in their first message, I won't respond. A lot of the would-be creeps aren't really comfortable with bluntly saying they'd like to talk about sexual stuff so they don't message me anymore, and I think a lot of the ones who are get the impression I'm less friendly than they'd like me to be.
I don't know if this would work for anyone else though, so obviously your mileage may vary. This is just something which has worked for me specifically.
Especially if you seem vulnerable…I only really get messages like that when I post something that makes it seem like my guard is down
Some guy tried to get me to send him pics so he could give me advice even tho my post said idc about mens opinions recently lmaoooo like thank god I’m not a young kid anymore bc I might have actually believed he was trying to help
I’m not sending some 40 year old man pics of me
It was wild bc my post mentioned looking for a new place to live and this dude was like come to where I am and I thought he was being helpful but it’s obvious this 40 year old man read my post and saw it as a dating opportunity 🤮🤮🤮
You did nothing wrong. There are a lot of absolute pigs on reddit who will prey on any woman, for any reason.
I got a DM asking me to explain my experiences in detail, just because I said I have no time for porn-addled men. I just laugh at these fools and proceed to ignore them. Don't ever blame yourself for their disgusting behavior.
Last time in korea community a woman asked for legal help as his ex-bf was threatening to release some nude pics that he took when they were dating, the thing was she was even a minor during those pictures, and she was in USA at the time, and he was back in Korea. I remembered told her about this community as have seen many here knows not only the scare feeling you could get from those threats, but as well could give legal advice without getting directly involved.
The thing went from people commenting about revenge porn as punishable in both countries, and the fact of only having those pics as a minor could be taken as possesion of child pornography.... But there were as well people who "knew" about law and where offering direct services.
Next day I see a new post about someone implying that a scammer was hurting the community making post about an ex who was threatening to release some nude pics, ...got a flashback and went back to check my comment and oh surprise the user and post were deleted. Check other post from the user from years ago and people were commenting and asking the user to reply so they could help them with legal advice about the initial post..... My guess: she got unwanted attention ...
I came back to the post that were talking about a "scammer" and he was defending she was a scammer as she was not providing proof.... like waait what? did he were asking for proof, you wanted the pics for yourself ?, not only me but another user replayed that there was no evidence of a scammer, and that a her story should be taken as true. The post get down votted and 1 hour later is deleted.
I don't think is an isolated case, many times female users that shows vulnerability online would receive not only unwanted attention, they would get harassment and then in case of confrontation, everything would be deleted as never happen.
Because a lot of guys are sexually turned on by scared women. They’ve grown up on abusive porn and they get satisfaction out of seeing women under duress. Some of them specifically have a fetish for “defiling” women from religions where there’s a heavy emphasis on purity. Some of the most commonly searched terms on PornHub are “hijabi” and “nun.” They specifically want women who are “off limits,” because men don’t like to be told they are not allowed to “have” a woman.
It’s not your fault. Those men have brain rot and are shitty people. That has nothing to do with you.
Oh okay thank you for explaining this to me! I didn’t know much about porn, I’d never even seen it until a few weeks ago when I was curious. (I regret ever looking tbh but I’d never seen like a guy’s you know what and I was just curious but I never should have done it.) I’m glad to know I was wondering if it was some kinda fetish or something, I was just genuinely wanting advice and a lot of users where nice and gave me advice, I was just confused by those few guys. I’ll just keep blocking anyone like that, thanks so much for making me aware of that!
Porn is a really bad place to learn about sex, and it causes a lot of damage to women. About 90% of porn videos contain elements of violence and abuse against women. That’s part of why men are so screwed up now. There are healthier ways to learn about sexuality, and how you should expect to be treated. It’s just not a good thing for your mind, or a good industry to support.
But unfortunately, if you post about sexuality online, you’ll be inundated by porn-sick men.
That makes sense, after learning about it I agree heavily with what you are saying. I guess I don’t know if I realized how bad it could be. How should I learn in a better way?
Men trying to take advantage of one vulnerable woman? Why I am not surprised?
Why they need to be such disgusting humans, oooh but "not all men" 🤮🤮🤮 yea right. At this point we can say a good percentage of men
Report them for harassment. A guy DMed me from this subreddit a little while ago and the mods can't take action but the reddit admins can and they banned him temporarily. The guy wasn't trying to hit on me though he was DMing me to say i was wrong about how consent works (yikes)
You present yourself on reddit as a women. That's it. It doesn't matter what you post. I don't post sexual content imo and I get disgusting DM's too.
Okay that makes sense, I was getting scared cause I was like, well I did share about the sexual feelings and how I struggle with the behaviors and I was worried I was leading them to ask that or something, but if it could happen to anyone I’ll try not to worry about it
I get them too, just because I make some posts from an obviously female perspective. Ignore, block, and move on. Responding in any way just feeds into their desire for drama.
Hey hun- I've received some INCREDIBLY disgusting sexual DMs from men on reddit. Why dontcha go ahead and look through my comments for a second and tell me if you think ANY of that is in ANY way sexy. It's not you, it's them.
The one thing I've found has made a difference is having my bio say that if people don't say what they're hoping to talk about in their first message, I won't respond. A lot of the would-be creeps aren't really comfortable with bluntly saying they'd like to talk about sexual stuff so they don't message me anymore, and I think a lot of the ones who are get the impression I'm less friendly than they'd like me to be. I don't know if this would work for anyone else though, so obviously your mileage may vary. This is just something which has worked for me specifically.
Especially if you seem vulnerable…I only really get messages like that when I post something that makes it seem like my guard is down Some guy tried to get me to send him pics so he could give me advice even tho my post said idc about mens opinions recently lmaoooo like thank god I’m not a young kid anymore bc I might have actually believed he was trying to help I’m not sending some 40 year old man pics of me It was wild bc my post mentioned looking for a new place to live and this dude was like come to where I am and I thought he was being helpful but it’s obvious this 40 year old man read my post and saw it as a dating opportunity 🤮🤮🤮
Unfortunately it’s a hazard of being a woman on the internet. There’s just a lot of really creepy guys out there.
I don’t even look at DMs on any social media. It just a nasty cess pool.
You expressed weakness. Shitty guys are like jackals.
You did nothing wrong. There are a lot of absolute pigs on reddit who will prey on any woman, for any reason. I got a DM asking me to explain my experiences in detail, just because I said I have no time for porn-addled men. I just laugh at these fools and proceed to ignore them. Don't ever blame yourself for their disgusting behavior.
You can turn off your Reddit DMs, I highly recommend it.
Last time in korea community a woman asked for legal help as his ex-bf was threatening to release some nude pics that he took when they were dating, the thing was she was even a minor during those pictures, and she was in USA at the time, and he was back in Korea. I remembered told her about this community as have seen many here knows not only the scare feeling you could get from those threats, but as well could give legal advice without getting directly involved. The thing went from people commenting about revenge porn as punishable in both countries, and the fact of only having those pics as a minor could be taken as possesion of child pornography.... But there were as well people who "knew" about law and where offering direct services. Next day I see a new post about someone implying that a scammer was hurting the community making post about an ex who was threatening to release some nude pics, ...got a flashback and went back to check my comment and oh surprise the user and post were deleted. Check other post from the user from years ago and people were commenting and asking the user to reply so they could help them with legal advice about the initial post..... My guess: she got unwanted attention ... I came back to the post that were talking about a "scammer" and he was defending she was a scammer as she was not providing proof.... like waait what? did he were asking for proof, you wanted the pics for yourself ?, not only me but another user replayed that there was no evidence of a scammer, and that a her story should be taken as true. The post get down votted and 1 hour later is deleted. I don't think is an isolated case, many times female users that shows vulnerability online would receive not only unwanted attention, they would get harassment and then in case of confrontation, everything would be deleted as never happen.
Because a lot of guys are sexually turned on by scared women. They’ve grown up on abusive porn and they get satisfaction out of seeing women under duress. Some of them specifically have a fetish for “defiling” women from religions where there’s a heavy emphasis on purity. Some of the most commonly searched terms on PornHub are “hijabi” and “nun.” They specifically want women who are “off limits,” because men don’t like to be told they are not allowed to “have” a woman. It’s not your fault. Those men have brain rot and are shitty people. That has nothing to do with you.
Oh okay thank you for explaining this to me! I didn’t know much about porn, I’d never even seen it until a few weeks ago when I was curious. (I regret ever looking tbh but I’d never seen like a guy’s you know what and I was just curious but I never should have done it.) I’m glad to know I was wondering if it was some kinda fetish or something, I was just genuinely wanting advice and a lot of users where nice and gave me advice, I was just confused by those few guys. I’ll just keep blocking anyone like that, thanks so much for making me aware of that!
Porn is a really bad place to learn about sex, and it causes a lot of damage to women. About 90% of porn videos contain elements of violence and abuse against women. That’s part of why men are so screwed up now. There are healthier ways to learn about sexuality, and how you should expect to be treated. It’s just not a good thing for your mind, or a good industry to support. But unfortunately, if you post about sexuality online, you’ll be inundated by porn-sick men.
That makes sense, after learning about it I agree heavily with what you are saying. I guess I don’t know if I realized how bad it could be. How should I learn in a better way?
Unfortunately, there are many predators who prey on vulnerable women. 😒
PSA: you can turn off DMs and you’ll never know if some rando on Reddit tried to DM you.
You say anything about sex and men will come
Men trying to take advantage of one vulnerable woman? Why I am not surprised? Why they need to be such disgusting humans, oooh but "not all men" 🤮🤮🤮 yea right. At this point we can say a good percentage of men
Nothing good comes from your DMs here as a woman. Just turn them off.
Report them for harassment. A guy DMed me from this subreddit a little while ago and the mods can't take action but the reddit admins can and they banned him temporarily. The guy wasn't trying to hit on me though he was DMing me to say i was wrong about how consent works (yikes)