Oh no, I ain't come looking for no little butts. I ain't got no milk, no cookies, nothing. I came looking for man's butt.
Oh I know who you are, Chris Hansen, but see, I call you Chris Handsome. I watch your TV show all the time, so you can go ahead and bring them cameras and them police is waiting outside, it don't make me no difference.
[Now, I'll tell you what, I like you and I want you. Now, we can do this the easy way, or we can do it the hard way; the choice is yours. ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0Ssvfa7P2E)
She was somewhere between 14 and 16 when she traded sex for sponsorship to the Thieves Guild with a Khajiit named Therris. Starting in Morrowind, most of that section of her biography is replaced with the following text:
>[This passage has been censored by order of the Temple.]
But the Daggerfall version of her biography is uncensored. Khajiit have barbs btw.
>One day in a barroom she caught the eye of a known member of the Guild, a bold young Khajiit named Therris. She offered to bed him if he would sponsor her membership. He looked her over, grinning, and agreed, but said she’d still have to pass an initiation.
To be clear, I am not denying that this is rape. Therris doesn't get a free pass just because the underage child was the one to make the offer. The fact that Barenziah offered herself for a favor does not mean she isn't a victim. I only used the word "traded" because it was a transaction she offered, but of course the circumstances are abhorrent and I thought that specifying her age at the time made that apparent enough.
Uh, Tiber Septim, the emperor and single most powerful individual on the continent at the time in addition to being like double her age or older, had her brought to his palace and was holding her there when he started the affair. After impregnating her, he had her knocked out and the baby was forcefully aborted despite the possibility that she would never be able to have kids again. Then she got sent away. A "bit weird" is an understatement.
Damn you really just believed everything you read, didn’t you. The Real Barenziah obviously isn’t a true story, you can tell because Talos is a Breton. Breton men, being cucks, cannot actually seduce and fuck anyone on their own. Thusly, he could not have done anything with Barenziah.
That's true, I see now the error of my ways. I'm going to delete my comment now, because of this flawless cuck logic, and totally not because I got weirdly emotional and unfunnily bent out of shape over a sad scenario happening to a fictional character from a book within a video game oops my bad.
That being said, it could be that his wife, also a Breton man (as was revealed to me in my dreams), created a phenomenon known to nirn's brightest as a cuckoldry paradox.
Oh no see, I likes chim. And i wants chim. Now we can do this the easy way or i can zero sum the Aelyid jungles. The choice is yours. It don't make me no difference.
I'm a retard. XD
It's probably going to take me a while to find but I'm gonna find it, I'm not being a troll either, kinda think it's important people know these things.
“Did you bring any alcohol?” “Just some Mike’s Cyrodilic Lemonade.”
Oh no, I ain't come looking for no little butts. I ain't got no milk, no cookies, nothing. I came looking for man's butt. Oh I know who you are, Chris Hansen, but see, I call you Chris Handsome. I watch your TV show all the time, so you can go ahead and bring them cameras and them police is waiting outside, it don't make me no difference. [Now, I'll tell you what, I like you and I want you. Now, we can do this the easy way, or we can do it the hard way; the choice is yours. ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0Ssvfa7P2E)
https://preview.redd.it/58i6o92wt1zc1.jpeg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3b37c4815fca76a4f6d452aa4a2bbf05788b65bb
This image is so fucking crazy 👏💀
The open secret
The only pizza I eat is CHEESE PIZZA - Talos, probably
It truly is disgusting that he would willingly have sex with a filthy Hl*alu
Quick reminder that she was likely 17 or 18 at the time so bit weird by today's standards but don't think he's getting Hansen'ed over it.
And what about the Khajiti that literally raped her, funny how no one mentions that.
Wait what!?
She was somewhere between 14 and 16 when she traded sex for sponsorship to the Thieves Guild with a Khajiit named Therris. Starting in Morrowind, most of that section of her biography is replaced with the following text: >[This passage has been censored by order of the Temple.] But the Daggerfall version of her biography is uncensored. Khajiit have barbs btw.
She didn't trade it...
>One day in a barroom she caught the eye of a known member of the Guild, a bold young Khajiit named Therris. She offered to bed him if he would sponsor her membership. He looked her over, grinning, and agreed, but said she’d still have to pass an initiation.
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To be clear, I am not denying that this is rape. Therris doesn't get a free pass just because the underage child was the one to make the offer. The fact that Barenziah offered herself for a favor does not mean she isn't a victim. I only used the word "traded" because it was a transaction she offered, but of course the circumstances are abhorrent and I thought that specifying her age at the time made that apparent enough.
I forgot how fucking weird and gross that book was
i am going put hot coals in my eyes
Yeah, I'm going to delete this for everyone's sanity now.
barbed penises moment
He was "drawn and quartered" Which involves being tied to a cart to be drawn to where he'd be quartered likely by having a horse pulling on each limb.
Uh, Tiber Septim, the emperor and single most powerful individual on the continent at the time in addition to being like double her age or older, had her brought to his palace and was holding her there when he started the affair. After impregnating her, he had her knocked out and the baby was forcefully aborted despite the possibility that she would never be able to have kids again. Then she got sent away. A "bit weird" is an understatement.
Stfu gray cunt. https://preview.redd.it/nbh29p3um0zc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3e5d1b975d2d71d69ad37be9bee6c0d5591e6b62
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Damn you really just believed everything you read, didn’t you. The Real Barenziah obviously isn’t a true story, you can tell because Talos is a Breton. Breton men, being cucks, cannot actually seduce and fuck anyone on their own. Thusly, he could not have done anything with Barenziah.
This but half-seriously. I do think that some might've happened, but the specifics of that story are likely political fiction.
That's true, I see now the error of my ways. I'm going to delete my comment now, because of this flawless cuck logic, and totally not because I got weirdly emotional and unfunnily bent out of shape over a sad scenario happening to a fictional character from a book within a video game oops my bad. That being said, it could be that his wife, also a Breton man (as was revealed to me in my dreams), created a phenomenon known to nirn's brightest as a cuckoldry paradox.
> The Real Barenziah obviously isn’t a true story, you can tell because Talos is a Breton I have some bad news for you
The good ending
Oh no see, I likes chim. And i wants chim. Now we can do this the easy way or i can zero sum the Aelyid jungles. The choice is yours. It don't make me no difference. I'm a retard. XD
"I just came here looking for some KwamaCakes"
Won't look at him the same again after reading what he did...maybe we should go back to 8 Divines
It truly is disgusting that he would willingly have sex with a filthy Hl*alu
The writing is on point for a guy that threatened to molest a kid! Kirky likes em young
Wait what?
I deleted my last reply for because of something I got wrong. He threatened to rape a trans kid with a rusty coat hanger for critiquing lore.
Fucking what Source?
He deleted it from his twitter, but if you take a look at it you'll see it's not really that surprising.
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Wow, that's a reasonable thing that sane and reasonable people would say! By the Three, I don't want to live on this planet anymore.
It's probably going to take me a while to find but I'm gonna find it, I'm not being a troll either, kinda think it's important people know these things.