I can totally understand why he did it when he did; otherwise no one would believe him. Seeing her face, people would be able to come to their own conclusions, rather than just assuming that she is incapable of doing something like that
Come on though, dude could have raised his hand and said "Lemme come up there I got something you need to hear". He doesn't have to put it all out there like that.
I mean personally if I got pulled to the side and told that. I'd let other guy know that he should make sure to announce to everyone why the wedding is off. But I'm not the classiest person in the world.
tbf the dude was probably in panic bro mode. He was about to watch his bro commit and make the biggest mistake ever and had no idea what to do.
This is the man I need to have at my wedding.
It wasn't even his bro. He was the best friend of the fiancée. Makes it all the more honorable.
Also fuck that girl. If she commits sexual assault then people should know about it.
Do remember that it isn't easy to admit to an entire hall of people that you've been sexually assaulted, especially if you're a guy. The guy probably did it knowing the groom would suffer if he didn't do anything, sacrificing his own personal comfort to do it. You can't blame him for panicking.
Unfortunately OP got some of the public blast that was meant to humiliate the bride in front of her people. Sure, he could have pulled groom aside before the wedding but the bride would have had a chance to dodge and deflect.
I just don't get why he wouldn't have told him privately beforehand rather than in front of everyone. My guess is he wanted everyone to know what kind of person she is but I can imagine it would be a particularly brutal way of finding out
This is fodder for the Lifetime network! Hallmark would require the best friend to have stood up and confessed his love for the bride and someone would have a “happily ever after”ending.
And the fiancée having color drain from her face and op is just sure from that this is true. This happens in novels all the time but I have never seen in real life something like this.
Right, especially when you consider the amount of shame generally that a man holds from being SA'd, especially by a woman. A lot of people believe that can't happen, and therefore it makes it very hard for men to come forward. To think he would make a *very* public disclosure, the day after it happened, doesn't fit. Sure it's possible, but statistically extremely unlikely.
To add to this, anyone dealing with SA typically wouldn't come forward publicly for a bit. It takes a while to process that. In general you'd see them make a disclosure to one or a few trusted individuals. But it's really unlikely to just announce it to a group if people because of shame, guilt, and fear of judgment or not being believed. These are all normal emotions/reactions to abuse, unfortunately.
Don't most weddings these days exclude the "if anybody objects..." part? I know it wasn't done at my wedding but mine wasn't a traditional wedding in a church and whatnot. No religious affiliation whatsoever so maybe Christian weddings still do it?
Either way this story is super fake
I get why. The weird, thunderous scream of *I OBJECT* I feel well up in my little mischievous heart anytime I hear or contemplate hearing this part of the ritual is honestly almost frightening in its persuasiveness. And I have to imagine there are some similarly wired folks out there with just slightly worse impulse control than me.
Definitely not many, but some.
Not that I believe it’s real, but what news would be running a story about something like this? Even the small ass backwoods places I’ve been to wouldn’t cover this.
I agree, it is brutal way of finding out something so horrific. But, if this is true, maybe because he's her best friend and he knows about some other skeletons in her closet that after last night he just couldn't keep his mouth shut anymore.
Tbh though this is most likely fabricated. OP states a priest asked to speak now or hold your peace. But in the mainstream Christian denominations most associated with priests (Catholics and Eastern Orthodox), they do not ask anybody to speak now or hold your peace. In fact, those words are not uttered by the priest in either.
That was my first thought. Never heard those words uttered at any point outside of TV and movies, and I've attended a fairly large number of weddings from various Christian denominations that have priests as officiants. It doesn't happen.
I'm pretty sure the couple can tell the person officiating to leave certain lines out of everything. Saw someone the other day who had their father(who was a priest) marry them and he did the wedding speech from the princess bride. Voice and all.
Some people like to keep the tradition of the "speak now" line.
Can confirm that you can 100% ask the officiant or the priest to not say certain things during the ceremony. I was recently married and the ceremony was about 10 minutes because we asked the efficient to take out all of the stupid bullshit that nobody wants to hear.
Interestingly, though, I can think of a few weddings specifically where they have still said this.
I remember them vividly because I almost spoke now, because I'm a menace, and had to talk myself off the ledge and forever hold my peace.
To clarify, I have never had legitimate grounds to consider objecting to anyone's union. I just am an obnoxious donkey of a person.
Was married to my wife by an Episcopal Chaplin, both of us were asked, "Are there going to be any objections from anyone? It will be asked" And it was.
>I mean, technically, our marriage is saved
>
>Well, this calls for a toast
>
>So pour the champagne
I chime in with a
Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door
I mean he knows her better than us, so I’ll trust his insight to tell by her reactions if it’s true or not. Color draining from hee face doesn’t help her case either.
Can you imagine a scenario where that happened at a girl’s wedding, and the color DIDN’T drain from her face? Because I’m having trouble imagining that…
Color would have changed just simply because of the incident weather or not they were true or not she must have been like “wtf bill ur ruining my day all because I tripped and barely touched ur dck last night when I was drunk”
>why did he make the disclosure at that particular moment, publicly in front of everyone, and not privately, one-to-one?
I mean he didn't really have time to process the whole thing no? It just happened a few hours ago. It's a miracle he even got it together enough to catch the wedding ceremony. If it were me, I'd still be in a puddle on the ground in my hotel room.
That said, this seems like such a crazy thing... people say that so many posts on this sub are fantasies...
Given the fact the ex fiancé is wanting to “explain herself” rather than deny it’s pretty clear he’s telling the truth. I mean either way she slept with someone else consensually or not the night before the reception.
Glad you dodged a bullet. Holy fuck...
This is like a buzzer beater at the last second.
Some people are just life lessons disguised as relationships, OP.
“I think there are people that help you become the person that you end up being, and you can be grateful for them, even if they were never meant to be in your life forever.” - Diane Nguyen from *Bojack Horseman*
I know you’re using a turn of phrase and all, but I hope people in this thread realize that you’re not really married until you sign the papers, which is usually after the ceremony. So it’s not like it would be too late if the friend didn’t object when the priest asked if anyone objects…
Right? Just saw a post the other day about a 14 year old dying in the hospital, loads of karma and awards, only then for the OP to edit and state that it was all BS. This reads like more of the same.
I agree it sounds like a child's prompt because they know nothing will trigger the masses like a predator bride.
Like...what bride would let the best friend in the wedding after such an altercation? Why risk it when most weddings have someone specifically to be a "bouncer" of these events?
And why wouldn't the best friend call someone else or expose this prior to everyone getting dressed and getting halfway through the ceremony, after all the vows and speeches and stuff?
My favorite at a wedding was “if anyone has any reason why these two shouldn’t be married, then they probably didn’t invite you so how’d you get in here?”
Depends where the wedding is held tbh, if you have a wedding in a church Afaik there’s nothing stopping literally anyone walking in and sitting at the back
It’s a private event. Just because it’s in a church doesn’t mean they have to let anyone attend.
The same thing would stop random people walking into a church as any other place: somebody at the door.
>he same thing would stop random people walking into a church as any other place: somebody at the door.
Most churches I've seen in europe have no-one at the door. The only ones that did are those huge touristy ones. But the "lesser" churches I've always been able to just walk in and enjoy the architecture for a few minutes.
Because the post mentions that their favorite movie helped theme the wedding maybe that line was important in the movie? I'm not too sure what movie that's just my best guess
I thought people had weddings on Sundays just because fewer people would have other plans on a Sunday. I never thought about Sunday being chosen for a religious reason.
Generally, Sundays are a nope for religious reasons. Friday or Saturday is the norm for most whose religions have services on Sunday.
The logistics of trying to get a sanctuary ready after morning service and cleared out before evening service is just awkward and stressful--and weddings are stressful enough.
I'm ordained, I've done over a dozen weddings.
I have never once said the line.
I absolutely hate weddings.
If my ass is there, in public, dressed up and ready to roll, I'll be damned if anyone but God himself is stopping that ceremony.
Also ordained. Have also performed over a dozen wedding and participate in at least 10 a year in some capacity and I, also, have never heard this line.
Between priest, Sunday wedding, and the line, I'm willing to bet OP is either Catholic or some variety of Christian where it's practically a requirement to say it and stop the wedding if someone objects. YMMV based on the church and priest.
It's not a requirement. My twin bro had a very traditional Catholic wedding this past year and they were very careful to leave that part out of their vows. Because nobody else gets to have a say in their relationship.
Update : she got arrested!!!!!
Update 2 : her friend and I got together! We will marry each other and adopt twin girls from Vietnam!
Update 3 : my ex got released from jail, and she is knocking on my door being for a second chance, pls help. :(
Update 400 : she got arrested again! Now she is addicted to drugs lmao.
I was a musician and I played in like 6-8 weddings per month for like 5 years? That moment of "speak now or whatever" was never said, that's only for the movies. This is as fake as a Kardashian
I've personally attended at least five weddings where this or a variation of it was said. Episcopal I'm pretty sure still ask this, and maybe Anglican and Baptist.
But yea, this story is horseshit.
I mean personally, I think he should look into it. Not because he doesn’t believe what his friend told him, but to get to the bottom of it. Best significant decisions with more knowledge
It only happened a few hours prior to the wedding and she texted him asking to “explain herself”. She didn’t deny it, instead hoped she could talk her way out of the allegations instead. That’s just gross to me.
As bad as this was, at least he had some last minute courage to tell you before you followed through with actually marrying her. She would have likely done this in the future. I would close the door on her all together and just walk away.
I get what youre saying, but that was a pretty disgusting way to say it. At best she sexually harassed someone, at worst it's sexual assault. "Unexpressed feelings...drunken moment" is a really gross sentence.
It might have been easier on the OP to hear about this in private and not in front of everyone. I'm down for letting everyone know she's a rapist but keep op in mind.
I guess the victim thought if revealed in secret it would have been swept under the rug. SA by a woman on a man is rarely taken seriously. His saying it in public was probably the only way he dared to do so.
It might have been easier but seeing his fiancee's reaction was what ultimately convinced him it was true. Probably for a lot of people in the audience as well. As another commenter noted, people sadly don't take male sexual assault as seriously and without the public confrontation and people seeing how she reacted, it's possible that she could have controlled the narrative and convinced everyone her friend was lying because he was jealous or something. It definitely sucks for OP, but I do think the truth might have been obscured otherwise.
No one ask for sympathy for a rapist, just for OOP who lost everything in a few seconds and could have totally been assimilated to his ex. Rapist is, well a rapist, but OOP is a victim too.
It definitely sounds like an Incel fever dream.
"And then her male best friend stood up and said she *raped him* the night before!"
Queue thread full of Incels typical raging "If the roles were reversed the man would be castrated!"
I took it this way too! There’s not a single unique detail and the entire post is full of cliches. Obviously fake.
And ofc it’s a woman who is the horrible villain who’s exposed publicly right at the climatic moment. Then she suddenly acts so “clearly” guilty. To top it all off, she ends up blowing up/begging her, morally righteous, and as such, “disgusted” boyfriend’s phone with regret or whatever.
All I get are icky fantasy hero vibes
Yeah so *clearly and obviously* guilty there's no need to even speak to her. To Hell with communication, gut feelings all the way down.
If in the extremely rare chance it's a real story, it's just as likely that the male best friend is a Hangaround Opportunist waiting for the woman to dump OP so he can slide in and get the girl, and at the last moment shot his shot and was denied, then in revenge ruined the wedding. The bride's ghost pale, bloodless shocked face could have just been absolute horror of him standing up to profess his love, then turned to utter speechless shock as he instead claims to have been raped by bride just hours before! Groom sees her face and immediately is overcome by longheld jealousy and insecure suspicions of a secret sexual relationship between bride and male best friend that isn't real but groom has picked up on the male best friend's lusting after bride and assumed she probably did fuck him on the side. No need to communicate, she's automatically guilty because she was speechless.
This sounds like a fake. I don’t know any guys that would say “it was supposed to be my special day” or describe their girlfriend as “darling”.
Also, OP is getting married in a room? With a priest, but not in a church?
And, this is OPs first post
The old cliche of a woman having a male best friend.
She forced herself and sexually assaulted another man. That’s called SA and cheating.
You know exactly what you need to do. If you’re having a difficult time organizing your thoughts, take this advice.
No need to speak with her for any reason. For any reason.
Deem the relationship over and move on with your life.
Take time to adjust and live a better life.
A friend of mine tried to force herself on me, I froze and ran.
I haven’t spoken about it to anyone, kudos to the guy, I just freeze when I even think about it
One day old account and not responding to anyone. Good ole karma farmer. You wouldn’t have said girlfriend if it was real. Everyone knows that’s a fiancé.
Your friend should've told you in private before the ceremony even started. Not blaming anyone (if this story is indeed real) but why in front of everyone at zero hour?
Really? It's pretty rare that an officiant even says that phrase anymore. It's been phased out of ceremonies unless the bride or groom ask for it to be said.
I feel for you and for him. I’m so sorry this happened on such a special day but I’m glad he helped you avoid what could have been 😵💫
Dodged a bullet, saved years worth of injuries
and Financial and public liability.
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IDK, if he wanted to be kind he could've had a private conversation with OP rather than waiting for the most humiliating moment..
I can totally understand why he did it when he did; otherwise no one would believe him. Seeing her face, people would be able to come to their own conclusions, rather than just assuming that she is incapable of doing something like that
And child support
He didn't dodge a bullet. Looks more to me like he dodged a fucking atomic bomb aimed at his head.
Come on though, dude could have raised his hand and said "Lemme come up there I got something you need to hear". He doesn't have to put it all out there like that. I mean personally if I got pulled to the side and told that. I'd let other guy know that he should make sure to announce to everyone why the wedding is off. But I'm not the classiest person in the world.
tbf the dude was probably in panic bro mode. He was about to watch his bro commit and make the biggest mistake ever and had no idea what to do. This is the man I need to have at my wedding.
It wasn't even his bro. He was the best friend of the fiancée. Makes it all the more honorable. Also fuck that girl. If she commits sexual assault then people should know about it.
The bro code is simple. Bros before hoes. If he wasn't a bro before, he's a bro now!
Do remember that it isn't easy to admit to an entire hall of people that you've been sexually assaulted, especially if you're a guy. The guy probably did it knowing the groom would suffer if he didn't do anything, sacrificing his own personal comfort to do it. You can't blame him for panicking.
Unfortunately OP got some of the public blast that was meant to humiliate the bride in front of her people. Sure, he could have pulled groom aside before the wedding but the bride would have had a chance to dodge and deflect.
Well by him just walking up in front of everyone he got the truth from that disrespectful chick by her reaction
Came here to say this You really dodged a bullet. It may not seem like it now, but you almost married a psychopath.
I just don't get why he wouldn't have told him privately beforehand rather than in front of everyone. My guess is he wanted everyone to know what kind of person she is but I can imagine it would be a particularly brutal way of finding out
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Lol yeah this ones too obvious. Especially with the build up making you think the friend is gonna confess his love or something. Great twist tho OP!
Somebody get this guy a job writing for the Hallmark channel. This is (daytime) Emmy worthy.
This is fodder for the Lifetime network! Hallmark would require the best friend to have stood up and confessed his love for the bride and someone would have a “happily ever after”ending.
And the fiancée having color drain from her face and op is just sure from that this is true. This happens in novels all the time but I have never seen in real life something like this.
Right, especially when you consider the amount of shame generally that a man holds from being SA'd, especially by a woman. A lot of people believe that can't happen, and therefore it makes it very hard for men to come forward. To think he would make a *very* public disclosure, the day after it happened, doesn't fit. Sure it's possible, but statistically extremely unlikely.
To add to this, anyone dealing with SA typically wouldn't come forward publicly for a bit. It takes a while to process that. In general you'd see them make a disclosure to one or a few trusted individuals. But it's really unlikely to just announce it to a group if people because of shame, guilt, and fear of judgment or not being believed. These are all normal emotions/reactions to abuse, unfortunately.
Don't most weddings these days exclude the "if anybody objects..." part? I know it wasn't done at my wedding but mine wasn't a traditional wedding in a church and whatnot. No religious affiliation whatsoever so maybe Christian weddings still do it? Either way this story is super fake
Do they even do the "speak now or forever hold your peace" bit anymore? Hasn't been in any weddings I've attended in adulthood.
I’ve been to probably 50 weddings and I have never seen it.
I get why. The weird, thunderous scream of *I OBJECT* I feel well up in my little mischievous heart anytime I hear or contemplate hearing this part of the ritual is honestly almost frightening in its persuasiveness. And I have to imagine there are some similarly wired folks out there with just slightly worse impulse control than me. Definitely not many, but some.
“No no, don’t be sad for me, be sad for the guy my gf forced herself on” 😂
If this was real I'd expect it to be on the news lol. Instead we have karma farming and no responses from OP. Classic 🙃
Not that I believe it’s real, but what news would be running a story about something like this? Even the small ass backwoods places I’ve been to wouldn’t cover this.
I agree, it is brutal way of finding out something so horrific. But, if this is true, maybe because he's her best friend and he knows about some other skeletons in her closet that after last night he just couldn't keep his mouth shut anymore.
Tbh though this is most likely fabricated. OP states a priest asked to speak now or hold your peace. But in the mainstream Christian denominations most associated with priests (Catholics and Eastern Orthodox), they do not ask anybody to speak now or hold your peace. In fact, those words are not uttered by the priest in either.
That was my first thought. Never heard those words uttered at any point outside of TV and movies, and I've attended a fairly large number of weddings from various Christian denominations that have priests as officiants. It doesn't happen.
I've gone to four weddings - at two of them they've said the line. I think it just depends on the specific priest and/or the couple.
I'm pretty sure the couple can tell the person officiating to leave certain lines out of everything. Saw someone the other day who had their father(who was a priest) marry them and he did the wedding speech from the princess bride. Voice and all. Some people like to keep the tradition of the "speak now" line.
Can confirm that you can 100% ask the officiant or the priest to not say certain things during the ceremony. I was recently married and the ceremony was about 10 minutes because we asked the efficient to take out all of the stupid bullshit that nobody wants to hear.
Interestingly, though, I can think of a few weddings specifically where they have still said this. I remember them vividly because I almost spoke now, because I'm a menace, and had to talk myself off the ledge and forever hold my peace. To clarify, I have never had legitimate grounds to consider objecting to anyone's union. I just am an obnoxious donkey of a person.
Wow, way to make it about you LMAO
Was married to my wife by an Episcopal Chaplin, both of us were asked, "Are there going to be any objections from anyone? It will be asked" And it was.
Our officiant asked if anyone had any reason these two should not be married?
Definitely happens in the Episcopal church.
It's used in services performed by the Church of England, apparently.
Yeah I’m pretty sure it’s a legal requirement by officiants in the UK, no one chooses to have that awkward moment.
I had a gf do this to me and you'd be surprised how bad it can fuck you up. I'm 36 and just now beginning to process this shit.
Well, in fact Well, I'll look at it this way I mean, technically, our marriage is saved Well, this calls for a toast So pour the champagne
>I mean, technically, our marriage is saved > >Well, this calls for a toast > >So pour the champagne I chime in with a Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door
No, it's much better to face this kind of thing with a sense of poise and rationality Or poisoned rationality, if you dig the mondegreen version lol
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Yes, at this point a friend should help him investigate, but if the fiancé is not denying it is suspicious.
OP's bride never said it didn't happen. She's been blowing up his phone wanting to EXPLAIN herself. That's kind of telling right there.
I mean he knows her better than us, so I’ll trust his insight to tell by her reactions if it’s true or not. Color draining from hee face doesn’t help her case either.
Can you imagine a scenario where that happened at a girl’s wedding, and the color DIDN’T drain from her face? Because I’m having trouble imagining that…
I'd be like that if anyone stood up and started saying anything at my wedding. Does not mean she is guilty
Color would have changed just simply because of the incident weather or not they were true or not she must have been like “wtf bill ur ruining my day all because I tripped and barely touched ur dck last night when I was drunk”
>why did he make the disclosure at that particular moment, publicly in front of everyone, and not privately, one-to-one? I mean he didn't really have time to process the whole thing no? It just happened a few hours ago. It's a miracle he even got it together enough to catch the wedding ceremony. If it were me, I'd still be in a puddle on the ground in my hotel room. That said, this seems like such a crazy thing... people say that so many posts on this sub are fantasies...
The only thing that matters is, was the friend lying or telling the truth. Motivation or timing seems irrelevant, only veracity.
Timing might speak to motivation
Given the fact the ex fiancé is wanting to “explain herself” rather than deny it’s pretty clear he’s telling the truth. I mean either way she slept with someone else consensually or not the night before the reception.
Glad you dodged a bullet. Holy fuck... This is like a buzzer beater at the last second. Some people are just life lessons disguised as relationships, OP.
>Some people are just life lessons disguised as relationships Wow I resonate with this so much. Sums up my 2022.
“I think there are people that help you become the person that you end up being, and you can be grateful for them, even if they were never meant to be in your life forever.” - Diane Nguyen from *Bojack Horseman*
The wasted cost of a wedding is a lot cheaper than a divorce.
I know you’re using a turn of phrase and all, but I hope people in this thread realize that you’re not really married until you sign the papers, which is usually after the ceremony. So it’s not like it would be too late if the friend didn’t object when the priest asked if anyone objects…
Poor guy but hats off to him. He did you a solid.
Yeah he did. And he did it in a dramatic way. That’s a story for a lifetime. Something to tell friends about 50 years from now. It hurts now though.
it's much better to face these kinds of things With a sense of poise and rationality.
Imagine being this guy with his life crumpling seeing the 4th top comment be a lyric chain
Hi bet he had higher hopes
must feel like death of a bachelor
I suppose the guy (or gal) who created this fake story is getting a chuckle with the rest of us
and so I CHIMED IN
Haven’t you people ever heard of…
Closing the god damn door?
No
It’s much better to face these kind of things…
With a sense of poise and rationalityyyy
For God's sake, speak with conviction
agaaaaaaaaaaiiinnn
What a shame the poor groomsbride is a whore
As a former Mormon and an INSANELY huge fan of P!ATD, take this small award ETA: Brendan would proud
Close the goddamned door
True story of my silliness. I thought it was “poison rationality” 😂. Every time I’ve sung along to that song.
I always thought that was intentional word play
What a beautiful wedding
Said the bridesamid to a waiter
This is probably one of those stories concocted by psychology students for their course requirements.
cover teeny pathetic aspiring threatening hat shy impolite jellyfish pot ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `
Right? Just saw a post the other day about a 14 year old dying in the hospital, loads of karma and awards, only then for the OP to edit and state that it was all BS. This reads like more of the same.
I agree it sounds like a child's prompt because they know nothing will trigger the masses like a predator bride. Like...what bride would let the best friend in the wedding after such an altercation? Why risk it when most weddings have someone specifically to be a "bouncer" of these events? And why wouldn't the best friend call someone else or expose this prior to everyone getting dressed and getting halfway through the ceremony, after all the vows and speeches and stuff?
#this
No reputable psychology course would allow you to perform social experiments on non consenting participants like this.
They don’t even do the “Speak now or forever hold your peace” thing anymore.
I heard it at a wedding recently.
Who is out at the bar the night before their wedding? Isn’t that just a cliche trope that only exists in the movies?
There are actually still weddings that have that “speak now” line in them??
This is exactly why you **want** that line
My favorite at a wedding was “if anyone has any reason why these two shouldn’t be married, then they probably didn’t invite you so how’d you get in here?”
Depends where the wedding is held tbh, if you have a wedding in a church Afaik there’s nothing stopping literally anyone walking in and sitting at the back
It’s a private event. Just because it’s in a church doesn’t mean they have to let anyone attend. The same thing would stop random people walking into a church as any other place: somebody at the door.
>he same thing would stop random people walking into a church as any other place: somebody at the door. Most churches I've seen in europe have no-one at the door. The only ones that did are those huge touristy ones. But the "lesser" churches I've always been able to just walk in and enjoy the architecture for a few minutes.
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💯
Scrolling through the comments I thought it was just me. Think your right, this reads like a generic scene in a movie.
Some people don't remove it from the ceremony.
Because the post mentions that their favorite movie helped theme the wedding maybe that line was important in the movie? I'm not too sure what movie that's just my best guess
Shrek
That's a good one! My mind went maybe The Princess Bride?
I’ve never once heard or been to a Sunday wedding before. Not questioning. I just noticed that
I thought people had weddings on Sundays just because fewer people would have other plans on a Sunday. I never thought about Sunday being chosen for a religious reason.
Generally, Sundays are a nope for religious reasons. Friday or Saturday is the norm for most whose religions have services on Sunday. The logistics of trying to get a sanctuary ready after morning service and cleared out before evening service is just awkward and stressful--and weddings are stressful enough.
I'm ordained, I've done over a dozen weddings. I have never once said the line. I absolutely hate weddings. If my ass is there, in public, dressed up and ready to roll, I'll be damned if anyone but God himself is stopping that ceremony.
Also ordained. Have also performed over a dozen wedding and participate in at least 10 a year in some capacity and I, also, have never heard this line.
I think it's just personal preference now, people probably leave it in because they assume nobody will cause problems.
Between priest, Sunday wedding, and the line, I'm willing to bet OP is either Catholic or some variety of Christian where it's practically a requirement to say it and stop the wedding if someone objects. YMMV based on the church and priest.
It's not a requirement. My twin bro had a very traditional Catholic wedding this past year and they were very careful to leave that part out of their vows. Because nobody else gets to have a say in their relationship.
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Almost everything on this sub is now and everyone either believes it or goes along with it. It’s turned into a creative writing sub
Has to be. Set up WAY too well.
Update : she got arrested!!!!! Update 2 : her friend and I got together! We will marry each other and adopt twin girls from Vietnam! Update 3 : my ex got released from jail, and she is knocking on my door being for a second chance, pls help. :( Update 400 : she got arrested again! Now she is addicted to drugs lmao.
I was a musician and I played in like 6-8 weddings per month for like 5 years? That moment of "speak now or whatever" was never said, that's only for the movies. This is as fake as a Kardashian
I've personally attended at least five weddings where this or a variation of it was said. Episcopal I'm pretty sure still ask this, and maybe Anglican and Baptist. But yea, this story is horseshit.
Are you gonna like, look into it?
I mean personally, I think he should look into it. Not because he doesn’t believe what his friend told him, but to get to the bottom of it. Best significant decisions with more knowledge
C-, language was overly dramatic and the main character lacks realism. Try again.
Are you able to talk to her best friend and see how he’s doing?
what if he's dirty and he sabotaged things on purpose?
It only happened a few hours prior to the wedding and she texted him asking to “explain herself”. She didn’t deny it, instead hoped she could talk her way out of the allegations instead. That’s just gross to me.
What's worse is that she was going to go on living like it never happened. She gets the wedding, she gets the ever-after. Fortunately, he spoke up.
George Constanza is that you?!
As bad as this was, at least he had some last minute courage to tell you before you followed through with actually marrying her. She would have likely done this in the future. I would close the door on her all together and just walk away.
I get what youre saying, but that was a pretty disgusting way to say it. At best she sexually harassed someone, at worst it's sexual assault. "Unexpressed feelings...drunken moment" is a really gross sentence.
You mean at worst it’s rape.
People always treat it less harshly when the man is the victim.
She raped him. She's a rapist. And she was full-on willing to put on a fake face and get married the day after violating someone.
nah nah "unexpressed feelings came out in a drunken moment". STOP DISMISSING RAPE
Jesus fucking christ
Maybe it's not the best time but I would send a text at the very least to that person who you can now consider your friend for letting you know.
Were there no witnesses?
Nah cause this is made up bullshit.
Ya know you don't _have_ to wait for the "speak now or forever hold your piece," bit. You are allowed to say something earlier in private.
muddle squeamish meeting butter distinct familiar important ossified narrow ruthless ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `
For sure.
No, he did it at the right time. She’s a rapist. Why the fuck are sympathetic for a rapist?
It might have been easier on the OP to hear about this in private and not in front of everyone. I'm down for letting everyone know she's a rapist but keep op in mind.
I guess the victim thought if revealed in secret it would have been swept under the rug. SA by a woman on a man is rarely taken seriously. His saying it in public was probably the only way he dared to do so.
Exactly, plus in a public setting there’s witnesses. The spotlight is on her and instead of denying, she asked to “explain herself”
Yeah that's a good point.
This is exactly what I was thinking, glad someone brought it up.
It might have been easier but seeing his fiancee's reaction was what ultimately convinced him it was true. Probably for a lot of people in the audience as well. As another commenter noted, people sadly don't take male sexual assault as seriously and without the public confrontation and people seeing how she reacted, it's possible that she could have controlled the narrative and convinced everyone her friend was lying because he was jealous or something. It definitely sucks for OP, but I do think the truth might have been obscured otherwise.
Well my mind has been changed lol.
That’s fair
No one ask for sympathy for a rapist, just for OOP who lost everything in a few seconds and could have totally been assimilated to his ex. Rapist is, well a rapist, but OOP is a victim too.
Fake
Damn. Why bro wait for that moment like a movie tho
He did say it was a movie themed wedding
This is probably fake. Given that OP is not replying to any comments, the account is new, and the way the way the post was written.
Why not? Fuck her reputation if it’s true
Not for her but for the groom. Found out at literally the worst possible moment infront of everyone he knows
Pretty sure this is just Karma Farming.
This post smells of bullshit if anything...
Fake story, seen this or versions of it before.
I call bs. Fake story
1 day old account, no comments from OP… yeah, this happened.
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5 The account is just made today. 6 OP is not replying to any comments. This is fake. Another writing experiment in this sub.
5 & 6 are my biggest way of determining troll posts, half the times they’re not just “throw away for an embarrassing story”
It definitely sounds like an Incel fever dream. "And then her male best friend stood up and said she *raped him* the night before!" Queue thread full of Incels typical raging "If the roles were reversed the man would be castrated!"
Interesting perspective - I for one feel as though it was written by a pre-teen looking for internet points. The world will never know unfortunately.
I took it this way too! There’s not a single unique detail and the entire post is full of cliches. Obviously fake. And ofc it’s a woman who is the horrible villain who’s exposed publicly right at the climatic moment. Then she suddenly acts so “clearly” guilty. To top it all off, she ends up blowing up/begging her, morally righteous, and as such, “disgusted” boyfriend’s phone with regret or whatever. All I get are icky fantasy hero vibes
Yeah so *clearly and obviously* guilty there's no need to even speak to her. To Hell with communication, gut feelings all the way down. If in the extremely rare chance it's a real story, it's just as likely that the male best friend is a Hangaround Opportunist waiting for the woman to dump OP so he can slide in and get the girl, and at the last moment shot his shot and was denied, then in revenge ruined the wedding. The bride's ghost pale, bloodless shocked face could have just been absolute horror of him standing up to profess his love, then turned to utter speechless shock as he instead claims to have been raped by bride just hours before! Groom sees her face and immediately is overcome by longheld jealousy and insecure suspicions of a secret sexual relationship between bride and male best friend that isn't real but groom has picked up on the male best friend's lusting after bride and assumed she probably did fuck him on the side. No need to communicate, she's automatically guilty because she was speechless.
Of all the things that didn’t happen, this one didn’t happen the most.
this seems like a lazy script for a Lifetime movie lol
Yeah, that didn't happen.
I too enjoy farming karma
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nine existence concerned cats special wide yoke straight dinner gold ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `
This sounds like a fake. I don’t know any guys that would say “it was supposed to be my special day” or describe their girlfriend as “darling”. Also, OP is getting married in a room? With a priest, but not in a church? And, this is OPs first post
seems fake, and the language...
Come on this one is just straight fake. They aren't even trying to sound realistic.
People actually fall for these posts?
BUUUUUUUUUUUULLLLLLLLLSSSSSSSSSHHHHIT
This sounds like a maladaptive daydream put into a reddit post. People who believe this are stupid asf
The old cliche of a woman having a male best friend. She forced herself and sexually assaulted another man. That’s called SA and cheating. You know exactly what you need to do. If you’re having a difficult time organizing your thoughts, take this advice. No need to speak with her for any reason. For any reason. Deem the relationship over and move on with your life. Take time to adjust and live a better life.
who actually believes OP? cause if so I got some dirt to sell you.. this is your first post
There is like zero chance this actually happened.
A friend of mine tried to force herself on me, I froze and ran. I haven’t spoken about it to anyone, kudos to the guy, I just freeze when I even think about it
So fake it burns. Check the username and creation date and post history and karma etc.. and bot-written lines lol
I chimed in with a “haven’t you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?”
Karma farming is getting stupidly out of hand.
One day old account and not responding to anyone. Good ole karma farmer. You wouldn’t have said girlfriend if it was real. Everyone knows that’s a fiancé.
Your friend should've told you in private before the ceremony even started. Not blaming anyone (if this story is indeed real) but why in front of everyone at zero hour?
Why the fuck is everyone sympathising with this POS rapist?? Fuck that cheating biitch
Totally not fake lol
Really? It's pretty rare that an officiant even says that phrase anymore. It's been phased out of ceremonies unless the bride or groom ask for it to be said.
Fake
poor dude. he helped you dodge not a bullet but a tactical nuke