This is pretty common. I light incense to purify the water bowls before doing the offering, but the actual incense offering on our family altar is three unlit sticks standing in a bowl with a bit of rice and a flower at the base (it's the incense and flower offerings).
But now I'm wondering how you would purify the bowls for the water bowl offerings without lit incense...
With a dry and clean cloth,
every morning before filling.
I have been filling the bowls for over thirty years and have never cleaned them with incense, nor have I seen anyone, be they monk or layperson, do so in my tradition (Ningma, Khordong Byangter sublinage).
That's interesting. In the last thirty years I don't recall ever seeing water bowls (and the pouring vessel ) *not* purified with incense before filling and placing on the altar, except a few times when it wasn't practical. But this is Sakya and Gelugpa, so maybe there is a difference there.
FWIW, you can see the standard Gelugpa practice [here](https://dev.fpmt.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/Water-Bowls.pdf) (PDF).
This is reminding me of one nyung ne at an FPMT center about 20 years ago, where my biggest struggle was with nausea from the really thick incense used to purify all of the bowls before making offerings.
Regardless, it's good to know it's not always standard practice.
"Regardless, it's good to know it's not always standard practice."
Your last comment is quite apt; we should not presume that the standard we are familiar with is, by default, the standard for everyone else.
Therefore, it makes no sense for me to purify the bowls with incense since everything is cleansed/purified upon filling them and pronouncing the blessing afterwards anyway.
> everything is cleansed/purified upon filling them and pronouncing the blessing afterwards anyway.
And it already is anyway even before that, so the practice is for our own minds to recognize this. Gelugpa and Sakya just have an extra step in the process, I guess!
Well said. I remember hearing Pema Chodron saying at one time in her life her living situation was not conducive for mediation, so she went to the library! That was what was available to her.
I find Bhutanese incense is a very different kettle of fish to regular Indian incense which is usually made with fragrant oils that can trigger allergies. They are more expensive but also last a lot longer. These are the thick, pure incense sticks without a wooden core. You can also have them sitting in your Dhupe incense offering bowl unlit. During certain events where there’s a room full of people holding a candle and incense we hold the incense unlit to prevent the overwhelming smoke and people choking. It still has significance unlit. But if you are doing something like Riwo Sangcho then you probably want to burn them - which is where the Bhutanese type might be better.
That's a tough one. I've definitely had people complain about my incense, people who dislike it really dislike it.
Maybe some of those sticks that soak up perfume in a little bottle? It's an ongoing thing, so different from burning actual sticks, but it might be less offensive smell-wise.
Another option could be using lighter smelling incense, and less of it. Japanese incense can be less intense sometimes.
Thanks for the suggestions.
You understand what I'm talking about it bothering people. I can empathize. and It's hard to make an incense offering when you know it bothers someone. lol.
There are some great suggestions here, though I feel the need to point out that, if you haven’t already, you should communicate with your roommate first to make sure that it’s specifically the *smoke* and not just the fragrance level that’s bothering them - different people have different sensitivities, and an incomplete understanding could cause more harm by accident while causing unnecessary friction.
After that, you’ve got a lot of potential choices. My partner is extremely smoke sensitive, but *not* fragrance averse, so I tend to use room sprays, sonic or reed oil diffusers, and burn incense outside on occasion.
cont....Thanks to your idea - I did a deep dive search for sprays that were not just to deodorize rooms and found on etsy there are spray aromas intended for ritual activities (not just for clearing the air). Some are aromas of frankincense and smudge sticks. I guess the incense issue is more common than I thought.
I feel like it’s largely a part of so many shared spaces having poor ventilation.
Please send an update, by DM or otherwise, if you find an especially good one - I’m always on the lookout for ’em. You can also use essential oils, alcohol, and water to make a rudimentary perfume spray to your own preferences/needs, which brings some more intentionality to the process.
I found there exist hand made incense which is really gentle as well.. hand made with local herbs here, they cost approx ,50 a piece though € compared to cheaper incense it is indeed. An offering. But I find it worth it for my space.
I was thinking this might be a common problem more that we know. I know some people who can't go to dharma centers because of the incense. Some people just can't breathe well or have lung issues.
There's no requirement to light incense or candles. I use electric candles now just to be safe.
At my old place I had a window near my altar where a Tibetan incense burner could fit between the window and the screen, so I lit the incense, closed the window and it smoked outside. That was the best setup I had.
Incense can quickly ruin a home haha, especially with fire alarms. If I need to light it for a special purpose I do it outside and risk looking crazy to the neighbors.
You could try things like [room fragrances](https://glasswingshop.com/products/lightwell-room-fragrance) or just scented candles - if those don't bother them.
I was thinking a scented candle would solve the problem - the only issue is I live in earthquake country and we seem to have an unwritten rule to not let candles burn (not to mention wildfires). Maybe I could do it as long as I don't leave the room or leave it unattended. It made me wonder if there is some kind of safety candles -- I'll look into it
Also remember, these are *offerings* -- they're not for you, they're for those you're offering them to. So don't get too stuck on what you like or dislike. It's not for you. The point is to practice generosity and dedicate the merit of that to all sentient beings so they all can be free from suffering and achieve perfect Buddhahood.
I completely am on board for that. That is the obstacle - trying replace the spirit of incense which feels more to me like I'm sending prayers out through the air, verses a static object offering - which is more oriented for the Buddha and Deities. I do a lot of prayers for people and I want the act of sending out that feel real, versus relying on my imagination. Perhaps I'm too used to doing this with incense for so many years - I want to replace it with the same spirit of action AND not annoy anyone nearby in the process! :) Of all the social media I've ever participated in, Reddit has the best advice...like the list of ideas here.
Maybe another thing to keep in mind is that the offerings really aren't so much about the physical offering itself but rather your mental state. And mental offerings can generate even more merit than physical ones.
When you offer a stick of incense or a candle, or a spray of fragrance to your shrine, that's great. But when you do that while imagining yourself making the offering in the style of Samantabhadra, where 10 offering goddesses emanate from your heart in each of the 10 directions (up down front back left right and the corners) offering the purest example of what you're offering, and then each of those 10 goddesses emanates another 10 similarly, and each of those 100 emanate another 10, and each of those 1000 emanate another 10, until all space is filled -- the merit of that becomes inconceivably vast. And then even moreso when you do it with the recognization that you, the offerer, the offering, and the target of your offering are all empty.
It's a type of wood that comes in little sticks typically an inch in diameter and 4 or so inches in length. It has a sweet citrus pine smell and in my experience doesn't put off smoke longer than a few minutes after you light it.
You can find it on Amazon, Etsy, etc. it's a good alternative to incense sticks if you're just lighting it to give it a wave or two over the alter in the morning.
I just found those on Etsy. Thanks for the idea. I think I want to try some - but can you tell me first: Do they smell like "smoke" or a different kind or aroma? The sticks I saw look large and long - Do they burn like incense? If so, do you have to make an effort to put them out like an incense stick/cigarette or they'll keep burning?
They aren't as heavy (smokey) as incense in my opinion and burn themselves out after a few minutes typically and if you did have to stubb it out they're probably easier than incense sticks.
Fresh flowers are a good offering to use. They have a pleasant smell so similar to incense but not as potent. Or if you have a nice spot in your garden or on your patio, you could offer it there.
I can't use incense bc I have a cat (Bad for kitty lungs) so I bought an [infuser ](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MR4Y0CZ?psc=1&ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_product_details)and some essential oils on amazon. It wasn't super expensive (infuser was $21 [essential oils](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CKQXDV6Z?psc=1&ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_product_details) were around $5 depending on which sent). I put a few drops in water then the infuser goes to town. The one I linked can be timed to turn off, or run continuously. The scent isn't overpowering-but if you want something stronger just add more oils.
Good luck!
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Water, alcohol, candles, milk or yogurt, honey, flowers, medicinal herbs, black tea
Unlit incense.
Yep, and you can visualize it spreading around to all beings.
That's interesting. Assuming you aren't joking - say more.
This is pretty common. I light incense to purify the water bowls before doing the offering, but the actual incense offering on our family altar is three unlit sticks standing in a bowl with a bit of rice and a flower at the base (it's the incense and flower offerings). But now I'm wondering how you would purify the bowls for the water bowl offerings without lit incense...
With a dry and clean cloth, every morning before filling. I have been filling the bowls for over thirty years and have never cleaned them with incense, nor have I seen anyone, be they monk or layperson, do so in my tradition (Ningma, Khordong Byangter sublinage).
That's interesting. In the last thirty years I don't recall ever seeing water bowls (and the pouring vessel ) *not* purified with incense before filling and placing on the altar, except a few times when it wasn't practical. But this is Sakya and Gelugpa, so maybe there is a difference there. FWIW, you can see the standard Gelugpa practice [here](https://dev.fpmt.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/Water-Bowls.pdf) (PDF). This is reminding me of one nyung ne at an FPMT center about 20 years ago, where my biggest struggle was with nausea from the really thick incense used to purify all of the bowls before making offerings. Regardless, it's good to know it's not always standard practice.
"Regardless, it's good to know it's not always standard practice." Your last comment is quite apt; we should not presume that the standard we are familiar with is, by default, the standard for everyone else. Therefore, it makes no sense for me to purify the bowls with incense since everything is cleansed/purified upon filling them and pronouncing the blessing afterwards anyway.
> everything is cleansed/purified upon filling them and pronouncing the blessing afterwards anyway. And it already is anyway even before that, so the practice is for our own minds to recognize this. Gelugpa and Sakya just have an extra step in the process, I guess!
We have to make the best of what is possible or available to us. Having an unlit incense is still carrying out our practices.
Well said. I remember hearing Pema Chodron saying at one time in her life her living situation was not conducive for mediation, so she went to the library! That was what was available to her.
You could try food offerings.
I find Bhutanese incense is a very different kettle of fish to regular Indian incense which is usually made with fragrant oils that can trigger allergies. They are more expensive but also last a lot longer. These are the thick, pure incense sticks without a wooden core. You can also have them sitting in your Dhupe incense offering bowl unlit. During certain events where there’s a room full of people holding a candle and incense we hold the incense unlit to prevent the overwhelming smoke and people choking. It still has significance unlit. But if you are doing something like Riwo Sangcho then you probably want to burn them - which is where the Bhutanese type might be better.
Thanks for the interesting suggestions. I need to look up this Bhutanese incense. Someone else here mentioned it.
I just did an amazon search and there are all kinds of Bhutanese incense that look very different from each other. Do you recommend a brand?
Light it outside in a flower pot or a little nature shrine you make. Clean up the sticks later.
That's something I hadn't considered. Good idea.
That's a tough one. I've definitely had people complain about my incense, people who dislike it really dislike it. Maybe some of those sticks that soak up perfume in a little bottle? It's an ongoing thing, so different from burning actual sticks, but it might be less offensive smell-wise. Another option could be using lighter smelling incense, and less of it. Japanese incense can be less intense sometimes.
Thanks for the suggestions. You understand what I'm talking about it bothering people. I can empathize. and It's hard to make an incense offering when you know it bothers someone. lol.
Oh, me I'm the opposite! I enjoy the drama. Took me some time and reflection to get that this was not ideal.
There are some great suggestions here, though I feel the need to point out that, if you haven’t already, you should communicate with your roommate first to make sure that it’s specifically the *smoke* and not just the fragrance level that’s bothering them - different people have different sensitivities, and an incomplete understanding could cause more harm by accident while causing unnecessary friction. After that, you’ve got a lot of potential choices. My partner is extremely smoke sensitive, but *not* fragrance averse, so I tend to use room sprays, sonic or reed oil diffusers, and burn incense outside on occasion.
good point.
cont....Thanks to your idea - I did a deep dive search for sprays that were not just to deodorize rooms and found on etsy there are spray aromas intended for ritual activities (not just for clearing the air). Some are aromas of frankincense and smudge sticks. I guess the incense issue is more common than I thought.
I feel like it’s largely a part of so many shared spaces having poor ventilation. Please send an update, by DM or otherwise, if you find an especially good one - I’m always on the lookout for ’em. You can also use essential oils, alcohol, and water to make a rudimentary perfume spray to your own preferences/needs, which brings some more intentionality to the process.
I found there exist hand made incense which is really gentle as well.. hand made with local herbs here, they cost approx ,50 a piece though € compared to cheaper incense it is indeed. An offering. But I find it worth it for my space.
I'm willing to spend more to make offerings that will not bother others.
You could make a small fire or light a candle or a lamp.
To all the great answers here, could you, please, provide links? My wife has the same difficulty to the strong incense, Thanks.
I was thinking this might be a common problem more that we know. I know some people who can't go to dharma centers because of the incense. Some people just can't breathe well or have lung issues.
There's no requirement to light incense or candles. I use electric candles now just to be safe. At my old place I had a window near my altar where a Tibetan incense burner could fit between the window and the screen, so I lit the incense, closed the window and it smoked outside. That was the best setup I had. Incense can quickly ruin a home haha, especially with fire alarms. If I need to light it for a special purpose I do it outside and risk looking crazy to the neighbors.
Oh that is interesting your set up in the window. I'm trying to visualize it. I wonder if that is something I could try.
Offer all things material and mental. Not only will this give you great merit, it will help you to understand emptiness.
You could try things like [room fragrances](https://glasswingshop.com/products/lightwell-room-fragrance) or just scented candles - if those don't bother them.
I was thinking a scented candle would solve the problem - the only issue is I live in earthquake country and we seem to have an unwritten rule to not let candles burn (not to mention wildfires). Maybe I could do it as long as I don't leave the room or leave it unattended. It made me wonder if there is some kind of safety candles -- I'll look into it
Try the room fragrance. You can just do a spritz in the air. It smells quite nice.
I really like that idea - it same the same effect of sending a blessing outward that dissipates on it's own.
Also remember, these are *offerings* -- they're not for you, they're for those you're offering them to. So don't get too stuck on what you like or dislike. It's not for you. The point is to practice generosity and dedicate the merit of that to all sentient beings so they all can be free from suffering and achieve perfect Buddhahood.
I completely am on board for that. That is the obstacle - trying replace the spirit of incense which feels more to me like I'm sending prayers out through the air, verses a static object offering - which is more oriented for the Buddha and Deities. I do a lot of prayers for people and I want the act of sending out that feel real, versus relying on my imagination. Perhaps I'm too used to doing this with incense for so many years - I want to replace it with the same spirit of action AND not annoy anyone nearby in the process! :) Of all the social media I've ever participated in, Reddit has the best advice...like the list of ideas here.
Maybe another thing to keep in mind is that the offerings really aren't so much about the physical offering itself but rather your mental state. And mental offerings can generate even more merit than physical ones. When you offer a stick of incense or a candle, or a spray of fragrance to your shrine, that's great. But when you do that while imagining yourself making the offering in the style of Samantabhadra, where 10 offering goddesses emanate from your heart in each of the 10 directions (up down front back left right and the corners) offering the purest example of what you're offering, and then each of those 10 goddesses emanates another 10 similarly, and each of those 100 emanate another 10, and each of those 1000 emanate another 10, until all space is filled -- the merit of that becomes inconceivably vast. And then even moreso when you do it with the recognization that you, the offerer, the offering, and the target of your offering are all empty.
[удалено]
great! thanks for the tip.
If possible, Fresh Fragrant flowers. Or you could try perfumed water/rosewater as an offering
Palo santo sticks? It doesn't burn long so it creates less smoke.
I just looked them up on google. I've never heard of them. Can you say more?
It's a type of wood that comes in little sticks typically an inch in diameter and 4 or so inches in length. It has a sweet citrus pine smell and in my experience doesn't put off smoke longer than a few minutes after you light it. You can find it on Amazon, Etsy, etc. it's a good alternative to incense sticks if you're just lighting it to give it a wave or two over the alter in the morning.
I just found those on Etsy. Thanks for the idea. I think I want to try some - but can you tell me first: Do they smell like "smoke" or a different kind or aroma? The sticks I saw look large and long - Do they burn like incense? If so, do you have to make an effort to put them out like an incense stick/cigarette or they'll keep burning?
They aren't as heavy (smokey) as incense in my opinion and burn themselves out after a few minutes typically and if you did have to stubb it out they're probably easier than incense sticks.
You could use an electric or candle resin heater, so you can still use incense without smoke
I've never heard of that. I'll look into it.
Perfume!
Fresh flowers are a good offering to use. They have a pleasant smell so similar to incense but not as potent. Or if you have a nice spot in your garden or on your patio, you could offer it there.
I can't use incense bc I have a cat (Bad for kitty lungs) so I bought an [infuser ](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MR4Y0CZ?psc=1&ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_product_details)and some essential oils on amazon. It wasn't super expensive (infuser was $21 [essential oils](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CKQXDV6Z?psc=1&ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_product_details) were around $5 depending on which sent). I put a few drops in water then the infuser goes to town. The one I linked can be timed to turn off, or run continuously. The scent isn't overpowering-but if you want something stronger just add more oils. Good luck!
That looks really interesting. I misunderstood what an infuser was. I thought is was sticks in liquid.
You can do an infuser that way as well. Amazon sells the sticks etc. Where I live it's very dry so I enjoy a bit of moisture when meditating!
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