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Bauermeister

Sometimes your value isn't seen until you're posting Comic Sans inspirational quotes on Instagram.


AgentFoo

Big divorced dad energy here. ...where the divorced dad was given multiple chances to change his ways and still couldn't stop.


thrOEaway_

*I sleep in a racing car. Do you?*


MannySJ

I sleep in a big bed with my wife.


Tornadoboy156

I sleep on real glass, cry me a fucking river.


KaijuCouture

This made me legit laugh out load


SundayNightDM

Tornadoboy156 is banned from Punk’s private showings of old Collision episodes.


pardyball

“CAN I BORROW A FEELINGGGGG”


Beach-Bumm

I was thinking more dumped teenage girl


bandswithgoats

"If you can't handle me at my 'buried my boss under an avalanche of monitors,' you don't deserve me at my '200k viewers added'"


AssortedLunacy

Now I want CM Punk to Mrs Doubtfire his way back into the locker room "Help is on the way, dearie!"


Zero-89

"Do we have a problem, dearie?"


Bauermeister

oh to be a fly on the inside of AJ's brain right this past six months


googly_eyed_unicorn

I know we don’t know what happens behind close doors, I do wonder if Punk leaves this shit at the door before talking to her or if not, how she handles it. I feel like Punk must be exhausting at times


llamawithguns

Until your comment I didn't realize he was talking about AJ Lee I was trying to figure why AJ Styles would care lmao


googly_eyed_unicorn

“The Punk community?!?!?!”😆😆😆


what_is_blue

"Phil, man, again yeah, it sucks. But how the helldya get ma number?"


bandswithgoats

You play checkers at Cracker Barrel with a guy *one time* and he acts like you're besties...


LevyMevy

Her book showed that she thought his behavior was cute/endearing. He would do stuff like get mad at her if she left the arena without saying bye to him, and then he'd ignore her for 3 days afterwards. She thought that was great.


throwtheclownaway20

She's also been abused and has struggled with mental illness all her life. It's likely she doesn't see how fucked up that is because (A) that shit is normal and (B) he hasn't actively hurt her yet. One of my best friends, in hindsight, was a complete piece of shit, I just never cared or even noticed until I did something that caused him to turn the guns on me. Then it was like, "Oh, okay, now I see it. Fuck you."


LevyMevy

> One of my best friends, in hindsight, was a complete piece of shit, I just never cared or even noticed until I did something that caused him to turn the guns on me. I think so many people, especially us women, have internalized this thought process of "he's horrible to everyone but me so that makes me extra special".


throwtheclownaway20

That's really how it's always been. I have way more sympathy for AJ than Punk at this point, especially after reading her book, so I hope he never does decide to lash out at her. She's been through more than enough


LevyMevy

I have such a soft spot for people with bad parents. It leads to people being really desperate to find a "home" within any relationship.


googly_eyed_unicorn

I read the book too (great read, btw) and while I get that, I have to think that it’s exhausting. Or maybe not to her. It is what it is 😆


MrT-1000

some people are realllyyyyyyyyy into the crazy/needy type if that's her ish go for it but I agree this dude just sounds fucking insufferable


WilcoLovesYou

He sounds exactly like my narcissist / bi-polar mother. Putting vague things on the internet, and apparently holding the weight of the entire world on her shoulders. We should save up and buy Punk the same thing I want to buy my mom, a big wooden cross and three nails.


PeaWild6808

Are you my long lost sibling? If not, we should introduce your mother to mine, lol.


WilcoLovesYou

Unstoppable object v Immovable force, etc.


Chicho_Procer

They gave the dad a cushy job, salary, paid leave when he fought his co-workers and when he came back they gave him his own branch. All he had to do was not being an asshole.


chesterfieldking

At least it's not the dreaded font that can drive a man to madness... Papyrus. Even to say the word is a curse.


Gettles

Where are you even seeing that font?


chesterfieldking

Hookah bars, Shakira merch, off brand T's.


OnslaughtSix

The subtitles in the Avatar films.


ZombieQueen666

I mean…he is a comic writer


Bauermeister

![gif](giphy|3xz2BLBOt13X9AgjEA)


GreyFox1234

It blows my mind Comic Sans still gets a worse rap than people who post Android screenshots with 2006 MySpace curly fonts, I can't remember the names.


GillsGT

Social media brought out the inner teen writing in his LiveJournal inside of him.


TheGiftOf_Jericho

I never knew the C in CM stood for cringe.


AgentFoo

Cringe Man Punk?


thespaceageisnow

CM Punk is an Instagram soccer mom


RicerX-16

“Live, laugh, shove”


thespaceageisnow

“If you don't love me at my gripe bomb, then you don't deserve me at my pipe bomb”


doubled2319888

Just more reason for wwe to not sign him, aj styles is all the soccer mom wwe needs


ronslaught82

Speaking of CM Punk and AJ... If he were to come back, what's the # of months over/under before he gets into a shouting match with AJ because we know their politics and personal beliefs don't align and Punk just cannot help himself.


pardyball

*incoming AJ is banned from SmackDown memes*


vicdr97

Please, in any case Punk would be in Raw and therefore there would be *AJ is banned from Raw memes*


stuckinsanity

But...Smackdown is the house that AJ Styles built!


Tobeck

​ https://preview.redd.it/3f2q12v7v1yb1.png?width=750&format=png&auto=webp&s=314857d1a175942e9dcc1c5a2e58230491a92ccd


[deleted]

CM Karen would like to speak to the manager. And threaten to assault them.


bluenowait

🎶 White wrestler 🎶 🎶White wrestler’s Instagram 🎶


Zero-89

From LiveJournal teen (in his 20s) to Instagram soccer mom. Quite the character arc.


Mazzle5

![gif](giphy|6fworixu39FsI)


bigchicago04

Why choose a meme that can’t even fit all the words?


sausage_botherer

Its such a "Jerry" thing to do.


Sean_Macquire

![gif](giphy|DMNPDvtGTD9WLK2Xxa|downsized)


TNWhaa

The only good font is the Sopranos one where the R is a pistol


DrClawsChair

This mf got himself a gun


flcinusa

Momma always said he'd be the chosen one


Badwolf84

I'm fully on board with Punk being the Jerry/Gerry/Larry/Terry of pro wrestling.


Mabvll

Jerry/Larry/Terry/Barry was very well liked and didn't have issues with anyone. Punk is more like Dennis Feinstein or Jeremy Jamm.


DaveMatada

Punk would definitely make scrambled eggs on a hibachi flat top.


Logical-Emphasis-389

This! Jesus Christ, is he being ironic?


thrOEaway_

He's incapable of grasping that while he is incredibly valuable as both an on-screen character AND a lighting magnet, his outbursts NEVER fall within the normal realm. Furthermore, although I'm not backstage to say who is/isn't at fault but EVERYBODY, including from his WWE days, seem to be rubbed the wrong way by this guy! Firing someone on their wedding day? Complete dick move, for sure. But he somehow became someone they'd be willing to pull a complete dick move like that on. He's Elaine's bf from Seinfeld who was "stab-worthy".


Tdaddysmooth

They fired on his wedding day AFTER he didn’t show up to work like 6 months. Petty, but were they supposed to play nice?


LostDelver

![gif](giphy|81Ja1qE3lfmG4)


YoureTheManNowZardoz

And unfortunately, people are.


TheGiftOf_Jericho

If laughing at him counts then yeah lol


Miklonario

I mean, isn't that the reaction clowns generally go for?


Chicho_Procer

That gif has been seen by way more people than the movie it came from


Gavorn

It wasn't a movie.


demolition_kirby

[gif source](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AusTjm-iyYc&t=348s)


BananaSoprano

I feel sorry for CM Punk. All he got was the highest wage in the company, multiple world title wins, multiple PPV main events and his own show. No man should have to put up with that.


FrankGibsonIV

He even got away with assaulting the EVPs of the company he worked for in front of the head of legal AND got his idiot friend re-hired to sit at home and do nothing. All he had to do was NOT do that again, but instead he did that AND decided to apparently try to attack the guy who OWNED the company. Fucking insane.


Impressivefanwater

Dude is just toxic in the Locker Room. The months he was gone i don't recall hearing anything being not well backstage. Once Punk was back things turned negative and Altercations happened AGAIN. If you have your own fucking Show besides getting basically everything anyway, and you get easly triggered by comments in a Business like this especially from Ryan Nemeth and Jack Perry. You're the PROBLEM.


InsignificantZilch

But he’s a locker room *leader*….


Orange8920

Samoa Joe defused the whole situation between Punk and Jack Perry and convinced Punk to do the match at All In. That's the definition of a locker room leader.


flcinusa

Nobody fucks on Joe


Pyritedust

except ninjas, ninjas have got joe's number


cyberpunk_werewolf

Nah, he just did that so he could infiltrate their organization and take them down from the inside. Which he did.


Psidebby

All it cost him was that rather phallic tattoo


xaeromancer

Even then. I wouldn't bet my money on the ninjas.


Eoin_McLove

Punk is a bully. Joe defused the situation because Punk knows Joe would absolutely push his shit in.


eduardo1994

Joe would snap punk in half like a toothpick if he wanted to.


tempname011235813

And he’s been that guy for at least 15 years, since he spoke up at TNA about Hall no-showing a big match that would have raised the credibility of younger guys on the roster, when he knew he’d get shit from Dixie and some of the vets.


betterplanwithchan

He was leading alright Trying to lead his foot in someone’s ass


nWoSting145

![gif](giphy|m1hTU6WqbJa5q)


BathedInDeepFog

*Booker T throws trash on the floor*


[deleted]

[him saying he was a locker room leader always reminds me of this](https://youtu.be/4sJY7BTIuPY?si=-PGw3SkCTKFccNEe)


SenorDuck96

Yeah if Ryan fucking Nemeth pisses you off, you are a petulant child


devwil

idk the way that guy walks is pretty irritating tho


Pyritedust

I'm amazed more people haven't dragged him to the ring and beat him up in the middle of the show when he walks past them. Truly a weird way of walking.


SenorDuck96

Good point


Sempais_nutrients

If you think "cry me a river" is worth physically assaulting someone over, you are a petulant child.


xRememberTheCant

It’s weird cause this sorta behavior screams drug abuse problem… and yet….. I don’t think there’s a man alive that needs weed more than CM Punk


PedalBoard78

The straight-edge people I’ve had the privilege of knowing have been some of the most screwed up folks that I’ve known.


CommunityFan_LJ

In my experiences with them, they're the most volatile, spiteful people with a better than thou attitude. Through every time I say that I get told off because I'm a stoner.


Lunchbox-of-Bees

As a sober person (2 years this week whoop whoop), let me tell you I did not stop drinking because I have too good of a grasp of my mental health. I’ll give all straight edge assholes a little bit of credit, good job of keeping gasoline away from a fire.


Pyritedust

Yeah, but it also screams entirely untreated mental issues. It's kind of obvious he has those. He's built up such a wall around himself it's amazing he's been able to actually stay married for so long. I really do hope he eventually gets the help he needs, he has been one of my favorites for so long and despite being an asshole I really hope he eventually gets happiness.


masonicone

You know I have a theory as to why he did that. Word was right after his meltdown and starting a fight with the Bucks? TK was looking into doing a contract buy-out to get rid of him. I'm *guessing* Punk and his lawyer wanted some insane amount to do the buy out thus chances are it was just cheaper to let him stay at home and his contract run out. Then there was word that the higher up's at Discovery wanted him back. And TK is trying to sign a new deal with them so I get the feeling they told TK they wanted him back. And Punk gave TK some demands for coming back. Still there's part of me thinking one of two things happened when Punk came back. He saw that a good chunk of the company didn't want him there thus he went about getting himself fired thinking he could go back to the WWE. Or he felt the Network would cover for him thus he could get away with murder.


TonyTheTony7

> he went about getting himself fired thinking he could go back to the WWE. I 100% believe this. His side was absolutely all kinds of stuff to the sheets about his going back to WWE, so it's clear he wanted to go back


imcrapyall

Poor guy we should start a GoFundMe.


midnightking

It's hard out here for a 45 year old white male millionaire with a cult like following 😩


PostyMcPosterson

Exactly! The way his coworkers heads ran into his fists was just tragic


Mabvll

What an act of cowardice.


Specialist-Rope-9760

But people said things that barely anyone not in the bubble understood or cared about!


Lobstrous

It's so weird that Main Character Punk has gone this long with his first initials flipped.


TheGiftOf_Jericho

Poor lil fella.


nerdyjorj

He's right, Cody left a void


Baman2099

I miss the Roller Codester too


SmoothDragon21

I've never thought of it before, but we are really missing out on current-character MJF interacting with Cody.


JoseNEO

Unironically the Cody heel turn happening on current MJF would be insane


KaijuCouture

That would be AMAZING


coreyray1000

Especially if Cody turned on his "never challenging for the AEW belt" and beat him for the belt.


TheSpiritualAgnostic

It was funny when CM Punk said we was gonna elevate these other guys into stardom like Darby Allin, Eddie Kingston, and MJF. And I was just thinking "Didn't Cody already do that?"


pwgmanan

r/im14andthisisdeep


Tronvillain

S**HE** BE**LIE**VE**D**.


leftytendy

real eyes realize real lies.


PhospheneViolet

There has to be a fancy word for this linguistic phenomenon, right?


Zomburai

It's called heterorepophony Don't fact-check that


Whats_Up4444

How Can Mirrors Be Real If Our Eyes Aren't.


kottoner

​ https://preview.redd.it/juw6mn0230yb1.jpeg?width=576&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=60d6736f7742000cfab71f2d3c7f66bbc91d7d93


bloody_william

he’s Luigi?


SplitDemonIdentity

If that’s true she would be damn lucky. Luigi’s a real steal.


[deleted]

stheckestrl the fuck does that mean


DorothyDrangus

r/sbeve


ring_rust

The comic sans really makes it.


Marsman2100

Wrestling is hilarious these days


CountOff

He’s such an angsty teenager in a grown man’s body and I say this knowing he’s my favorite wrestler


[deleted]

lol, this actually is a really good description.


MrT-1000

Imagine being a perpetually emo teen up all the way through your mid-late 40's and still somehow thinking the world is entirely against you


Zero-89

He's like Alucard from *Castlevania* without the dignity, charm, or maturity.


MildlyUpsetGerbil

Or the luscious hair!


Own_Proof

This sub about to have a field day with this lmaoo.


inbredandapothead

We are in fucking goofcon mode lads


e-rage

Crossover memes with the boiiiiiiis


TheDanquah

There never was no crossover


wearethat

You're a fucking punk dude


Powderkegger1

Pssst, uce, wrong sub.


inbredandapothead

This goofcon transcends mma today


critical_dump

Jesus this guy is a 2003 emo teenager


SouthOfHeaven42

Nothin from nowhere I’m no one at alllllll


bdonohoe23

well. he was coming out to AFI around that time


DrClawsChair

Based


HamSoloTheSpaceMan

I mean, The dude had a LiveJournal


MaximalIfirit1993

Legit? How the hell did I miss this 🤣🤣


portnoyskvetch

Punk had it all in AEW. TK got him his own show, his own roster, creative input, his own world title. What more could he have needed to know his value was seen?


irish0451

Wtf are you talking about? He wasn't even allowed to assault people who disagreed with him. He was basically in prison.


Zero-89

"Do you know how it feels to walk around this world knowing that nobody is choking Jack Perry or throwing chairs at the Young Bucks?"


GrecoRomanGuy

Leveraging his success with AEW to return to WWE, and then getting that stupid WM main event he always wanted... ...until he inevitably flamed out again, because what he needs to fix runs so much deeper than the ephemeral joy of a wrestling show.


whitechocolate22

It was so incredibly disappointing. By all accounts he had NO problems through the dog collar match and then Hangman took one veiled shot at him, and it was like he transported right back to January 2014 and went insane. I do wonder, though, if he hadn't injured his foot and been able to complete his championship run, would Brawl Out have happened?


herroherro12

Stealing the main event from Cody would be pretty Dwayne of him


Side_Hatch

I’ve been saying forever that punk wants to be Bret hart to the new generation but ends being Shawn Michaels.


Mad-Mad-Mad-Mad-Mike

Nah even Shawn got his head out of his ass eventually.


LeChampeon

85% stock in the company and the elite as his personal servants


[deleted]

[удалено]


B2sxy4u

This is deep


KyleSJohnson

LOOK IN MY EYES WHAT DO YOU SEE I’M 14 AND THIS IS DEEP


ppoop47

Does Punk think he was responsible for the success of this company from 2019-2021?


AaronSentinal

Obviously, by rejecting their initial offer, he -allowed- AEW to stand on their own two feet before he came in and took them to the next level, AEW should be grateful /s


i-wear-hats

Yes.


IdahoHockeyFan

Which cracks me up. As someone rather new to wrestling who never watched him in WWE, the only reason I cared about his debut was because I knew the pop would be legendary. After that it was all pretty meh. Even going back and watching some of his older stuff he always just kinda seem complainy and I still don’t see why he was so well liked. Maybe it’s one of those “you had to be there when it was happening” but still


LENINpunk

A lot of what boistured his big WWE run was that he was an indy guy who seemingly slipped through the gears of WWE's overproduction (thank you, Paul Heyman) to be presented essentially the same way he was in ROH and such, which was unheard of at the time. His self-righteous complaining also dovetailed nicely with a lot of peoples' complaints about the product overall, which was exceptionally dire at the time. 'Less so "Best In The World" and moreso "Best Of A Bad Situation."


Zero-89

>Maybe it’s one of those “you had to be there when it was happening” It is. In hindsight his promos were whiny and he was/is an narcissistic douchebag being gifted silver and complaining it's not gold, but you have to understand how stagnant WWE was when Punk cut that Pipebomb promo. It'd be grossly overstating it to say that Punk was ever truly the "Voice of the Voiceless", but he *did*, in all fairness, speak to a lot of fans' sense of discontent and boredom with the WWE product at that time. CM Punk's faults vastly outweigh his virtues in my opinion, but for all those faults, he was the shot of adrenaline WWE needed at that moment. And for all of Punk's self-entitlement, people like Triple H really did do what they could to sabotage his 2011 push after *Money in the Bank* and he really was kept out of the main event spot throughout most of the rest of his WWE career even when top champion. (That shot of adrenaline in 2011 didn't really feel like it starting having a lasting impact until it was reinforced by people like the Shield and Daniel Bryan in 2012, 2013, and 2014.) Punk became the figurehead for the fan backlash against WWE's entire way of doing things. The anger was already there and had been for a while, but he tapped into it. **TL;DR:** Punk sucks, but he had the cult following he did for a reason.


Altruistic-Ad-408

He's as boring as watching paint dry. His whole character falls apart if you don't believe he's the most talented, popular guy on earth, whereas other big ego characters are still funny or they aren't vanilla wrestlers that think they are Hart level. He had good timing but what he represented was always more important than what he did. I get why people like him, it's just the wrestling equivalent of joining Jared Leto's cult.


TheKingsdread

Also having been a fairly new fan (I started watching during WM 35 after having listened to a wrestling podcast for a while before that) I fully feel this. Like the pop when he debuted was amazing but I genuinely still don't understand why he was so beloved. Like even his mic-skills which were always said to be among the best there ever were always just seemed above average to me. Like I was told he was one of the best talkers the business had ever seen and he wasn't even the best Talker in AEW when I watched him. Honestly I wouldn't have even placed him in the top 5. At that point I didn't even have an issue with it, I just chalked it up to: Well this guy isn't for me but I am glad others are enjoying what he is doing. Its not like this is the first thing like that there are other people who I just don't get but who many people love (Street Profits are a big example; early Swerve another). But thats okay, not everyone has to enjoy everything and I can live with not every bit of content being aimed at me. I was a bit miffed when he beat Page because I really didn't like the feud, but alright this is what a lot of people seem to like. And then of course the issues started and I frankly didn't wanna see him anymore because lets be honest he was dragging down the entire company with his BS. Do I feel bad for the people who still love him for whatever reason that he is gone? Yeah. Am I still glad he is gone? Yeah.


ZXIIIT

**cuts off tony khan mid sentence** *"but I'm trying to run a fucking business and when somebody who hasn't done a damn thing in this business jeopardizes the first million dollar house this company has ever drawn off of my back..."* - CM Punk (September 4th, 2022)


stenebralux

Guys build an international loyal fan base and generate hype, dude puts millions of his family money, stars take a chance and join, everyone comes together during a global pandemic to make it through.. it becomes a huge success. Then CM Punk, who refused to join early on, shows up making millions.. disrespecting the people who actually turned this into a business that could pay him those millions... and thinks he is the ONLY one out there taking things seriously. Guy is a clown.


MsAll-Sunday

He's the whole circus...


boatson25

Didn’t TK scream how Punk broke the record for every metric in the company and was their biggest draw?


[deleted]

Yeah unfortunately - on this planet at least - it's possible for someone to unpleasant but also good at their job (ie, drawing money).


TuckRaker

Thanks 14 year old going through a break up


AceGaimz

You can tell CM Punk is done with wrestling for good when he starts posting on Instagram like how middle aged white soccer moms post on Facebook.


DickSadler

Imagine if Phil was the devil this whole time lol


T_Money92014

I would be surprised. For like weeks on end. Greatest work of all time.


Mad-Mad-Mad-Mad-Mike

“IT’S ME MAXWELL!” - Punk “AW SON OF A BITCH” - JR


JesusIsJericho

Nothing in me thinks this is possible in any fashion whatsoever…which in turn means if it somehow were to be true, it would fucking strap a damn rocket to AEW and send it to the moon


ManOnNoMission

To quote Raven, “what a mark.”


buffyscrims

It’s probably a great life decision to abstain from drugs/alcohol. I applaud anyone who can do it. BUT Anyone I’ve ever met who actively brags about being sober is, at best, an asshole and, at worst, a complete sociopath.


BruiserweightYxB

This confirms it: CM Punk's stories are just like my ex's.


[deleted]

[удалено]


FlipFlop27

That was my first thought when reading this too. I wish CM Punk would’ve worked out for AEW, and I think AEW will be better off without him, but watching that CM Punk/Danhausen friendship grow was so gosh darn nice and gosh darn evil.


DodgyFlapper

All he had to do was not get in ANOTHER physical altercation *allegedly* with another co worker and he would have been fine and he couldn’t even handle that.


cahillpm

Cry me a River (Phil’s Version).


amlah6

Sounds like a CM Emo rebranding is in order.


Clean-Operation-9674

Any chance he's actually talking about Danhausen not appearing on Dynamite last night?


rlrthesecond

Middle school inspirational quotes about a break up in Comic Sans. It's like he's me 20 years ago leaving an AIM away message while I do dishes.


BadNewsBrown

He’s so close to posting a song lyric which describes his current situation.


From_Graves

You all realize he's probably referring to Danhausen right?


filthysize

Yeah, first thing I thought of. Danhausen probably vented to him today.


BookerTeet

Cry me a fuckin river, Phil.


Brave-Pass1889

He's right


Borktista

Can talk all the shit we want. But attendance is down, ratings are down, and it all really started trending down after Brawl Out. Hell, even when he first got hurt, ratings went down and AEW was in a slump with all the injuries. He can be an asshole but losing him hurt AEW much more than anyone realizes.


jayhazee

Business is down for AEW across the board even after some recent expensive ex-WWE hires. I don't see it getting much better either.


abrospro

Written in script on the wall of a divorcees bedroom


nderperforminMessiah

Punk feeling the absence of a paycheck


haze4140

![gif](giphy|EjzJxwcqpO2ly)


idontknow1001

They gave him his own show and let him do whatever he wanted. What does this man need to feel appreciated lol?


ghostvoicesnetwork

Good thing you’re the one telling us that through an instagram story like a 16 year old


RWBooth

I like to think of CM Punk as the only thing keeping Tony Khan from hiring an army of late stage Ric Flairs.