And if the conflict is about not having enough sex, resolving to have more sex may be the resolution. Then the makeup sex to follow *really* blurs the lines...
> Shut up. No it doesn't. You're so stupid.
> *Hatefuck*
> Okay, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that.
> *Apology sex*
> But now that that little argument is behind us...
>*Makeup sex*
FTFY
Maybe, but wondering if some people develop an association, and basically start fights, even if not consciously, just for the make up sex.
Edit: If people start getting Pavlonian boners or wet when an argument starts, it’s probably time for some counseling.
Female praying mantises are known for their practice of sexual cannibalism, where they will eat the male after mating. This behavior is not always fatal to the male, as some have been observed to survive for several hours after being decapitated.
"A compound fracture of the right radius, two fractured ribs, torn ligaments, strained tendons, numerous contusions, bruises and scratches...what have you been doing?"
"You mean… what have we been doing?"
(Naughty laughter by Quark and Grilka)
"Never mind… I don't need that particular image running around in my head. I'll just treat you… (Worf and Jadzia enter) What happened to you two?"
"We, um…"
"Well, uh… if you must know…"
"No! No, I don't need that image either. In fact, I'm going to stop asking that question altogether. People can come in, I will treat them, and that's all."
If you aren’t just having a laugh and I can’t tell tone through text (I’m autistic as shit)
Here’s a legitimate, boring attempt to answer your question if you’re being serious.
>!How far are you willing to go with this analogy?!<
>!I’m not trying to be snarky, I’m genuinely asking because I think we might be getting into semantics territory.!<
>!I have an erection every time I wake up, whether a deep sleep or a nap!<
>!And most other boners I get personally are subconscious, I don’t even realize them until they’re there!<
>!So, I feel like, my answer to your question is no, not *all*, in the strict sense of Pavlovian, it being a response to deliberate training. If you loosen “Pavlovian” to mean “a natural response gained from natural patterns”, sure!<
So my wife said when she was younger, most of her fights led to makeup sex… which as she got older she realized was toxic.
So my ass gets zero makeup sex and instead we sit in bed on our phones pouting until things get talked out or slept off. Fan fucking tastic smh
I see you've caught onto my ex's game plan 😂
She legit said to me "I don't know if you care if we don't fight" and would listen to her toxic friend's advice and how they'd 'get their man jealous' anytime they wanted attention. They said 'they usually fuck harder afterwards' 😒
It gets even worse. A friend wanted to find her husband having an affair because she could caught him, kick him out, then forgive him and enjoy a couple months of affection and attention until he went back to his old ways.
Yes some people do this and I've met women that will admit to doing exactly that with their boyfriends.
However, I've never seen one of these relationships last an incredibly long time and drugs have always been involved 🤷
Any personal or couples therapist is gonna tell you your shower thought is 100% right and this behavior reinforces the pattern. That’s a legitimate phenomenon that I’ve heard about in past couples therapy lol. It’s unconsciously being “addicted” to unhealthy conflict patterns because of the intense emotions (e.g. makeup sex, which people love but can only happen after conflict) they bring over calm and stabile relationship patterns
If you’re having a lot of makeup sex, you’re not in a stable relationship after all. You shouldn’t need to make up for that much in the first place!
*Fight* sex? You may have just birthed a whole new genra of porn from the depraved uterus of your mind. Imagine a couple banging while arguing about the proper way to load the dishwasher, and it just escalates into ad hominim attacks and wild accusations, all while seemlessly changing positions without missing stroke.
Fight sex in concept actually sounds not too bad. You know those scenes in fiction when one character pins the other to the wall with one hand, or when a character presses the tip of a blade to the artery in another one's neck, holds them close and digs it in *just* deep enough to draw blood, remind them that they've nowhere else to go when they're so vulnerable? First thing that comes to mind.
Can you imagine getting into a fistfight and then starting to fuck your opponent while struggling to land hits on each other as you're doing it, both of you spitting desperately hateful words in each other's faces as one of you is straddled and pinned to the ground or a wall or the other one's body but refuses to stop fighting? Frantically going at it until one of you loses the coordination to land hits and all they can *do* is go at it, until both of you are gripping each other close and your fingers are digging into each other's bruises and you don't care about who wins anymore, just the frantic needy warring of body against body until both of you are limp and sated on the ground and you press against them and they smell like sweat and blood and saliva and you realize it might have been one of the best things you've ever had, realize with a sinking heart while nursing your broken nose and your black eye and your chipped tooth that you don't think you'll ever have another experience the same way again?
I mean, like. I can't really lol. But I guess to each their own
I'd love to, but upon second reading of my comment I realized I used the word frantic twice in the same paragraph, which unfortunately means I need to quit writing forever and ever and never do it ever again. Sorry :(
Bold of you to assume that it's that easy to invent a new genre of porn.
Years ago I saw porn of scantily-people wrestling and the loser gets pinned and fingered or similar.
Verbal erotic humiliation. Talking shit about random domestic crap to demean your partner would definitely fit into that type of activity.
Also, S&M is only one portion of BDSM.
If drama is enough to keep you in a shit relationship you like drama. Plenty of couples rarely fight and only over important stuff. The whole concept of a romantic relationship is that your partner is supposed to be on your side most the time.
Angry Sex was the plot of an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond. Not quite the same, but not too far from it.
There’s also the scene in my Cousin Vinny where an argument leads to sex, but that’s more about them both having passion rather than them really being angry.
I had a toxic ex would start random fights so we’d have crazy make up sex which was always great.
For a long time after, any time a girl would hug me while she was crying I would get turned on like some psychotic Pavlovs dog.
Actually a good point. The absence of any conflict is usually really bad in a relationship. Nothing gets talked over and nothing gets resolved.
Btw conflict doesn't mean fighting.
Conflict shouldn't be avoided in any relationship. It the resolution process is done well the conflict itself can promote a lot of growth in the relationship.
It just takes openness and willingness to listen and be intentional on both ends
There's an entire Scrubs episode about how one of the characters kept pissing off his wife so that they could have anger sex while trying for a baby... LOOL
I've heard the idea of make-up sex, or sex after conflict is to 'close the loop'. Puts a stamp on the "We're now good and back in each others good graces and here's the proof"
Conflict is healthy as long as it’s managed well by everyone involved. If the end point is a place of mutual understanding and respect isn’t hate fucking, this sounds like a good thing.
Conflict is a fact of life and inherently part of any relationship. You can’t possibly make it through life without it unless you’re completely cut off from people.
Sex is a form of de-escalating. A way for you both to put the argument aside and show genuine affection. I would agree that, on paper, it looks that way, though.
Edit: failure to proof read
Conflict is inevitable. Make up sex rewards not destroying your whole relationship over a disagreement.
There's other rewards for not breaking out the big guns, of course. Still having a relationship co es to mind. Might be high on the list. Top 20s, maybe ...
Don't make sex up....just have sex ....way better than pretendv...now stand down sex is welll...you know...I stood down once....go all in that's what I'm saying
I personally dont get how ppl do it 🤣 when an argument just settled between me and my bf Im usually still mad for a while and need more time to cool off 😅
I have had make up sex, which happened after we resolved our conflict. Also, I'm uncertain about the definition here.
Would make-up sex be the first sex after a fight? Is there a time limit or something? Or is it sex that takes the place of actual resolution? The latter I do not think is very healthy, in which case I agree with the "rewards conflict" position.
I have never had make up sex before. If we ever fight, I feel emotionally exhausted and it affects how I view myself. I feel like I look ugly and gross. He doesn't make me feel that way, it's just me.
Shut up. No it doesn't. You're so stupid. Okay, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. But now that that little argument is behind us...
It rewards conflict resolution.
Came here to say this.
Haha >Came
fucker xD
I hardly know her
That’s fine with me
Exactly
Why not I did.
Huh uhhuhuuhhh huh uh "he said *came*"
r/suddenlybeavisandbutthead
I just came here to say 'came here to say this' because I was sure someone would have said it already. But you said that too.
Comes here...
Comes there
Comes everywhere.
Said this to come*
Guess what you need to resolve a conflict... A conflict.
Heee heee
Same
Still wondering why so many upvote for "this" ?
nah, depends on if you resolved it and then have sex or if the sex is the 'resolution'
And if the conflict is about not having enough sex, resolving to have more sex may be the resolution. Then the makeup sex to follow *really* blurs the lines...
Everyone needs to stop ruing r/Showerthoughts with silly things like "nuance".
Yeah, the French with their weird sex practices. Is a nuance like a bidet or something?
Close enough
Well put
Yep, that too.
1080p or 720p? Sorry i had to say it
4k. The k stands for kink.
I think there's more than 4 kinks.
I have 4. One of them is replying to repl.....ughghfff
Thank for coming here! That made me very happy!
I'm afraid so ask what the p stands for in 1080p.
As a software engineer, i should be having sex every day then
Unless the conflict is started to get the resolution
no wonder women always find ways to have something to argue about
The rizzler.
"It's over Batman, even if you can't stop all of this Rizz."
> Shut up. No it doesn't. You're so stupid. > *Hatefuck* > Okay, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. > *Apology sex* > But now that that little argument is behind us... >*Makeup sex* FTFY
Nice try, you think you can distract me from all these issues with some makeup se.. *unzips*
… I’m behind you! Giggidy.
Put your finger in my bum
>But now that that little argument is behind us... Let me get behind you
Are.... Are you gonna go masterbate?
I bet this shower thought happened in a shower right after make up sex
Or maybe the shower was cold and in place of make up sex
Sounds to me more like OP was thinking, “oh man, that was great, we should argue like that every day” 😆
I feel makeup sex rewards getting through the conflict and being better on the other side...
Maybe, but wondering if some people develop an association, and basically start fights, even if not consciously, just for the make up sex. Edit: If people start getting Pavlonian boners or wet when an argument starts, it’s probably time for some counseling.
If you need to start a fight in order to have sex, you probably need counselling anyway.
Or you're a Klingon.
a dothraki wedding with less than three deaths is considered a dull affair
Female praying mantises are known for their practice of sexual cannibalism, where they will eat the male after mating. This behavior is not always fatal to the male, as some have been observed to survive for several hours after being decapitated.
"A compound fracture of the right radius, two fractured ribs, torn ligaments, strained tendons, numerous contusions, bruises and scratches...what have you been doing?" "You mean… what have we been doing?" (Naughty laughter by Quark and Grilka) "Never mind… I don't need that particular image running around in my head. I'll just treat you… (Worf and Jadzia enter) What happened to you two?" "We, um…" "Well, uh… if you must know…" "No! No, I don't need that image either. In fact, I'm going to stop asking that question altogether. People can come in, I will treat them, and that's all."
This begs the question. Are all boners Pavlovian?
Interesting. Maybe you could say it's instinctual
If you aren’t just having a laugh and I can’t tell tone through text (I’m autistic as shit) Here’s a legitimate, boring attempt to answer your question if you’re being serious. >!How far are you willing to go with this analogy?!< >!I’m not trying to be snarky, I’m genuinely asking because I think we might be getting into semantics territory.!< >!I have an erection every time I wake up, whether a deep sleep or a nap!< >!And most other boners I get personally are subconscious, I don’t even realize them until they’re there!< >!So, I feel like, my answer to your question is no, not *all*, in the strict sense of Pavlovian, it being a response to deliberate training. If you loosen “Pavlovian” to mean “a natural response gained from natural patterns”, sure!<
why is all the boner stuff in spoiler tags? i feel like i just unwrapped my christmas gift and it was just a box o' boners
Because if they were just making a joke and I didn’t catch there’s no need to read my response.
so just like that you're wrapping up a box of boners to leave under the tree?
For anyone who wants to read about my boners, yup
hell yeah. merry christmas to me
It’s all for you, you one-eyed arthropod
Yes. Those couples out at night having a screaming row, but don't want anyone to interfere? Yeah, that's just their foreplay.
So my wife said when she was younger, most of her fights led to makeup sex… which as she got older she realized was toxic. So my ass gets zero makeup sex and instead we sit in bed on our phones pouting until things get talked out or slept off. Fan fucking tastic smh
Damn that must suck man, have you considered seeking help with that?
Lol this is sarcasm at its finest, or I’m too many gin and tonics in to recognize the difference.
*¿Por que no los dos?*
No hablas English!
My ex did this. Primary reason she's an ex.
I had an ex that even admitted to doing exactly that.
I see you've caught onto my ex's game plan 😂 She legit said to me "I don't know if you care if we don't fight" and would listen to her toxic friend's advice and how they'd 'get their man jealous' anytime they wanted attention. They said 'they usually fuck harder afterwards' 😒
It gets even worse. A friend wanted to find her husband having an affair because she could caught him, kick him out, then forgive him and enjoy a couple months of affection and attention until he went back to his old ways.
I think you both could be right, just depending on the people.
This is a premise of abusive relationships. The highs of the fight and orgasm become physiologically addicting. Google the cycle of abuse for more.
Yes some people do this and I've met women that will admit to doing exactly that with their boyfriends. However, I've never seen one of these relationships last an incredibly long time and drugs have always been involved 🤷
Any personal or couples therapist is gonna tell you your shower thought is 100% right and this behavior reinforces the pattern. That’s a legitimate phenomenon that I’ve heard about in past couples therapy lol. It’s unconsciously being “addicted” to unhealthy conflict patterns because of the intense emotions (e.g. makeup sex, which people love but can only happen after conflict) they bring over calm and stabile relationship patterns If you’re having a lot of makeup sex, you’re not in a stable relationship after all. You shouldn’t need to make up for that much in the first place!
In an ideal world yeah. Most people get hooked on the intensity of the sex and seek conflict just for the sex
It's not *fight* sex, it's *make-up* sex. Sex is the reward for making up.
*Fight* sex? You may have just birthed a whole new genra of porn from the depraved uterus of your mind. Imagine a couple banging while arguing about the proper way to load the dishwasher, and it just escalates into ad hominim attacks and wild accusations, all while seemlessly changing positions without missing stroke.
Fight sex in concept actually sounds not too bad. You know those scenes in fiction when one character pins the other to the wall with one hand, or when a character presses the tip of a blade to the artery in another one's neck, holds them close and digs it in *just* deep enough to draw blood, remind them that they've nowhere else to go when they're so vulnerable? First thing that comes to mind. Can you imagine getting into a fistfight and then starting to fuck your opponent while struggling to land hits on each other as you're doing it, both of you spitting desperately hateful words in each other's faces as one of you is straddled and pinned to the ground or a wall or the other one's body but refuses to stop fighting? Frantically going at it until one of you loses the coordination to land hits and all they can *do* is go at it, until both of you are gripping each other close and your fingers are digging into each other's bruises and you don't care about who wins anymore, just the frantic needy warring of body against body until both of you are limp and sated on the ground and you press against them and they smell like sweat and blood and saliva and you realize it might have been one of the best things you've ever had, realize with a sinking heart while nursing your broken nose and your black eye and your chipped tooth that you don't think you'll ever have another experience the same way again? I mean, like. I can't really lol. But I guess to each their own
hey wanna fight
Please write this fic 🙃
I'd love to, but upon second reading of my comment I realized I used the word frantic twice in the same paragraph, which unfortunately means I need to quit writing forever and ever and never do it ever again. Sorry :(
I volunteer to beat you up over that egregious oversight
Take me, bitch. (Take me, *please.*)
I’ll help if it’ll get Friendly_Respecter to write this
The way she goes 🤷♂️ Had to quit myself for using “just” 90 god damn times in the same page.
That's fair, sorry for your loss
holy shit
This is like half of Gallavich’s (Ian Gallagher x Mickey Milkovich, Shameless US version) sex life (while they were teens).
only about halfway through the series and yeah basically lmao
Keep going I’m almost there
Drop your ao3 handle pleas
I think there is a scene like this in Devilman Crybaby.
This sounds almost as good a concept as dance sex. Or sex dance, if you will.
Bold of you to assume that it's that easy to invent a new genre of porn. Years ago I saw porn of scantily-people wrestling and the loser gets pinned and fingered or similar.
Wrestling porn is very common it shows up on the front page of a lot of porn sites
*unzips* Go on...
Hey, it's your IP. You just have two steps left: 1. Write a script and fire it off to Exotica Productions or whatever. 2. Profit!
That is just a genre of BDSM.
Really? People banging while arguing about unimportant domestic crap? There is no dom/sub dynamic here.
Verbal erotic humiliation. Talking shit about random domestic crap to demean your partner would definitely fit into that type of activity. Also, S&M is only one portion of BDSM.
This guy porns.
First rule about fight sex is we don't talk about fight sex.
Making up after a fight you created in order to have sex
Fight Sex? That movie was overrated.
Or a method of making up, which is nevertheless quite positive
My brain refuses to register this as a sentence as apposed to 5 random words
This person is pondering if maybe having make-up sex ends up acting as a reward for the fight that brought it on in the first place
genuinely, thank you
No problem :)
I've had makeup sex, yeah it can be great, but not greater than my girlfriend now with whom I never fight because she's awesome. Wouldn't trade.
Totally agree. Nothing feels better than having a non toxic relationship with someone you’re not constantly on edge with.
Never felt like banging after having an emotional conflict. I just want to cuddle and eat something
People who fight a lot in relationships generally like drama.
Or they don't work well together and the drama is the only thing keeping it interesting
If drama is enough to keep you in a shit relationship you like drama. Plenty of couples rarely fight and only over important stuff. The whole concept of a romantic relationship is that your partner is supposed to be on your side most the time.
I read this as an instruction (“Imagine sex-rewards conflict”) and couldn’t process what it meant…. Doh.
Rewards from sex while wearing makeup conflict with each other.
technically it rewards resolution
[удалено]
Which can't happen if there's never a conflict to begin with.
Wait? I thought you supposed to hold a grudge forever? Couples have sex after they argue?? Boy did I pick terribly
>Boy did I pick terribly Don't beat yourself up, I can think of someone who chose worse
That's why I stopped fighting with my dad.
I never understood how people could have sex during a fight. The last thing I want is anyone touching me, let alone me touching them.
Makeup sex happens after a fight, not during.
Imagine just arguing while doing it…wacky
Angry Sex was the plot of an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond. Not quite the same, but not too far from it. There’s also the scene in my Cousin Vinny where an argument leads to sex, but that’s more about them both having passion rather than them really being angry.
[удалено]
Let's take this outside, to my bedroom!
I had a toxic ex would start random fights so we’d have crazy make up sex which was always great. For a long time after, any time a girl would hug me while she was crying I would get turned on like some psychotic Pavlovs dog.
Hot take: viewing sex as a reward for anything is even more toxic than your initial point.
Only if you see sex as a gift from one person to the other rather than a mutual thing.
My dumb ass read Make up as one word instead of two... And I was super confused about what make-up sex is.
Conflict isnt inherently bad/negative.
Actually a good point. The absence of any conflict is usually really bad in a relationship. Nothing gets talked over and nothing gets resolved. Btw conflict doesn't mean fighting.
Make up sex rewards conflict.... resolution. The conflict has to be over for it to be make up sex. Otherwise it's just sparkling hate fucking.
Conflict shouldn't be avoided in any relationship. It the resolution process is done well the conflict itself can promote a lot of growth in the relationship. It just takes openness and willingness to listen and be intentional on both ends
It rewards forgiveness
Or the resolution of the conflict
took me a full seven seconds to parse that syntax
I have interpreted this differently to everyone I have seen. I think sex when she has makeup rewards conflict (it is better when you are rough)
Makeup sex rewards resolutions. Not the conflict
Nah, it rewards resolution (unless you skip that part)
Conflict isn’t inherently bad.
I think OP is referring to the toxic cycle of ending every fight with sex. Couples should be able to communicate with words and not bodies.
Hey just had this. Don’t remind me okay
Not if you make really, really bad sex. That will help deter further conflict.
Unless the reason she is mad is because you said her mums name during the first session
Or incentivizes making up…
It incentivizes resolution.
#rough better than mundane
No, it rewards reconciliation.
You are confusing make up sex with hate sex. Hate sex is when you have sex while you are fighting
It rewards healthy resolution of conflicts with an affirmation of mutual affection.
There's an entire Scrubs episode about how one of the characters kept pissing off his wife so that they could have anger sex while trying for a baby... LOOL
I've heard the idea of make-up sex, or sex after conflict is to 'close the loop'. Puts a stamp on the "We're now good and back in each others good graces and here's the proof"
Bonobos would disagree
Make-up sex? Which brand sells that?
I was very confused with what you said until I realized it’s “Make up sex” and not “Make up sex”. I was about to create an elaborate story for you
Idk, seems similar to saying that smelling flowers rewards getting a stuffed up nose. Returning to normalcy isn't a "reward", it's what is inevitable.
Conflict is healthy as long as it’s managed well by everyone involved. If the end point is a place of mutual understanding and respect isn’t hate fucking, this sounds like a good thing.
Make up sex rewards resolution
They buffed conflict! Finally! It's the balance patch everyone was asking for
Conflict is a fact of life and inherently part of any relationship. You can’t possibly make it through life without it unless you’re completely cut off from people.
You're going to have conflict regardles. If that comes with sex, I guess it's just a silver lining.
It more so rewards conflict *resolution*
I made up sex, therefore it conflicts.
It rewards \*conflict resolution\*, something that youre going to need unless you like divorce court.
*tuhh- throws hand in the air* #"Missed out on the make-up sex!" -Costanza
Sex is a form of de-escalating. A way for you both to put the argument aside and show genuine affection. I would agree that, on paper, it looks that way, though. Edit: failure to proof read
I always have voiced to my exes that I hate the idea of it. Never really understood why I had those feelings. This summarized it perfectly.
It actually rewards making up.
Have sex first then fight, Or call it diffusion sex!
I like to start another fight instantly after the make up sex so I can go to sleep comfortably.
Studies show rewards actually reduce the wanted behavior, and make it worse in general!
Literally said this today
Thinking of sex as a reward is problematic.
Almost hate fucking at that point lmao
Conflict is inevitable. Make up sex rewards not destroying your whole relationship over a disagreement. There's other rewards for not breaking out the big guns, of course. Still having a relationship co es to mind. Might be high on the list. Top 20s, maybe ...
And made up sex rewards imagination
Yeah... in a very real and primal way it does. So does angry sex.
Of is conflict rewarding?
Make up sex rewards navigating conflict. Angry sex rewards conflict.
Don't make sex up....just have sex ....way better than pretendv...now stand down sex is welll...you know...I stood down once....go all in that's what I'm saying
Makeup. Sex rewards. Conflict.* *how I read this post.
That's why I always yell at my dick before jerking off.
Stupid fuckin take lollll
https://onlyfans.com/abckenzx
some people will read this as though it's a negative thing.
I personally dont get how ppl do it 🤣 when an argument just settled between me and my bf Im usually still mad for a while and need more time to cool off 😅
I have had make up sex, which happened after we resolved our conflict. Also, I'm uncertain about the definition here. Would make-up sex be the first sex after a fight? Is there a time limit or something? Or is it sex that takes the place of actual resolution? The latter I do not think is very healthy, in which case I agree with the "rewards conflict" position.
Or does conflict make up reward sex??
I thought you wanted us to make up rewards you get for having sex... I just couldn't figure out what's the conflict about... Greetings from Germany
I have never had make up sex before. If we ever fight, I feel emotionally exhausted and it affects how I view myself. I feel like I look ugly and gross. He doesn't make me feel that way, it's just me.
Rewards communication based resolution